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29 Mar 07 - 02:05 PM (#2010922) Subject: Lyr Add: THE PORTREE KID From: John MacKenzie THE PORTREE KID As recorded by the Corries A man came riding oot the west One wild and stormy day He was quiet, lean and hungry His eyes were smoky grey He was lean across the hurdies But his shooders they were big The terror o' the hieland glens That was the Portree kid Chorus: Heedrum ho, heedrum hay The teuchter that cam' frae Skye. His sidekick was an orra man And Oh! but he was mean. He was called the midnight ploughboy And he cam' frae Aberdeen. He had twenty-seven notches On his cromach, so they say And he killed a million Indians Way up in Stornaway. Portree booted in the door He sauntered tae the bar He poured a shot o' Crabbies He shouted "slainthe bha" While Midnight was being chatted up By a bar room girl called Pam She said "Well howdy stranger. Would ye buy us a Babycham?" Now over in the corner sat Three men frae Auchtertool. They were playin games for money In a snakes and ladders school. The fourth man was a southerner Who'd come up from MacMerry. He'd been a river gambler On the Ballachulish Ferry Portree walked tae the table And he shouted "Shake me in " He shoogled on the eggcup He gave the dice a spin He threw seven sixes in a row And the game was nearly done But then he landed on a snake And finished on square one. The game was nearly over And Portree was daein' fine He'd landed on a ladder He was up tae forty-nine. He only had but one to go And the other man was beat When the gambler cowped the board up And shouted "You're a cheat!" Men dived behind the rubber plants Tae try and save their skins The accordionist stopped playing His sidekick dropped the spoons. He said "I think it's funny Ye've been up that ladder twice And ye ayeways dunt the table When I go to throw ma dice" The gambler drew his sgian dhu As fast as lightning speed Portree grabbed a screw-tap He cracked him o'er the heid And then he gave him laldy Wi' a salmon aff the wa' And he finished aff the business Wi' his lucky grouse foot's claw. Portree walked up tae the bar He said "I'll hae a hauf And dae ye like the way I stuck it on That wee Macmerry nyaff. But the southerner crept up behind His features wracked wi' pain And gubbed him wi' an ashtray Made oot o' curling stane. The fight went raging on all night Till opening time next day. Wi' a break for stew and stovies Aff a coronation tray. It was getting kinda obvious That neither man would win When came the shout that stopped it a' "There's a bus trip coming in" They sing this song in Galashiels And up by Peterhead Way down o'er the border Across the Rio Tweed. About what became of Portree, Midnight and the gambling man; They opened up a gift shop Selling fresh air in a can. A wee bittie culture for the masses. Giok |
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29 Mar 07 - 07:46 PM (#2011194) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid From: Q (Frank Staplin) See "The Portree Kid" as posted by Benjamin Bodhra/nai. 21 Feb 98, in thread 4122: Portree Kid Thread #4122 Message #21948 Posted By: Benjamin Bodhra/nai 21-Feb-98 - 05:55 PM Thread Name: Lyr Req: Ghost Riders in the Sky Subject: Lyr Add: THE PORTREE KID
As an aside here's a parody: |
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30 Mar 07 - 12:38 AM (#2011402) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid From: Jim Lad I have a friend who does "The Wild Colonial Boy" to this tune. It's hilarious. The Portree Kid is a classic though. It was really sad to see the late Johnny Cash try to turn it into a country song. (before he died) Is nothing sacred? |
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13 Sep 08 - 02:30 PM (#2439334) Subject: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,J. Thompson Hello. I have never heard "The Portree Kid", but I have not got it on CD. I have two CD's, with two versions. One with The Corries, and one with Alastair McDonald. Which one is the best, so which one should I hear first? Are there any other recordings of this song that's even better? Did Andy Stewart or Jimmy Logan ever record it? Thanks J. Thompson |
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13 Sep 08 - 09:47 PM (#2439648) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Susanne (skw) Haven't heard the Macdonald version, but he's usually good. From the Corries this is one of their few humorous songs that actually make me laugh. I think they do it very well. Just go ahead, listen (in whatever sequence) and enjoy! |
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13 Sep 08 - 10:20 PM (#2439667) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Effsee I think the Portree Kid was written by Bill Hill, Just a wee bit after Andy Stewart's or Jimmy Logan's time. |
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14 Sep 08 - 12:03 AM (#2439734) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Joe Offer Well, I have to admit that this song is filled with cultural references that mean nothing to this Wisconsin exile in California. Asking for an explanation of the whole song would be too much - but could somebody please explain the title to me? -Joe Clueless- |
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14 Sep 08 - 07:25 AM (#2439864) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Micca Joe, Portree is the biggest town on the Isle of Skye, on the West coast of Scotland, and since country music is very popular in Scotland the "Wild west" name affectation is not that unusual. The word "Teuchter" in the chorus is more difficult, it has a distinct niche meaning (In Ireland the word Culchie means much the same thing) of a Thick uneducated rural born and bred labourer. |
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20 Jan 09 - 07:52 PM (#2544553) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST WHere can I download the portree kid song? |
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20 Jan 09 - 08:05 PM (#2544568) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle By the way, Bill Hill (the author)is still very much alive and kicking: must be somewhat younger than either Jimmy Logan or Andy Stewart! He MC'ed a charity concert in Edinburgh at the weekend, and entertained us with some more hilarious poetry. Don't know if he ever recorded the song himself, and he doesn't do much singing in concerts now,though can still be heard in the sessions. |
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24 Jan 09 - 12:12 PM (#2547889) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle Guest, you'll probably have to buy the CD: it's not on Itunes. See here for the Corries website, it's on their "Comedy Collection" CD. http://www.corries.com/product_info.php?products_id=36 |
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25 Jan 09 - 09:57 AM (#2548702) Subject: RE: The Portree Kid, which version? From: sheila Is that Bill Hill, the same one who used to sing with Bill Smith's (ex-Corrie Folk Trio) wee brother Tom, back in the 60s? |
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11 Sep 12 - 04:02 PM (#3402960) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST Just discovered this old thread while trying to find a link to the lyrics for someone. It could well be that Bill Hill sang with Bill Smith's brother -- no idea really except that there must be some connection between Bill H and the Corries. They sang at least two of his parody songs -- Lucille was another. Also, the Corries Website sells Bill's own recordings. To the person who asked earlier in this thread if Bill recorded this, too: Yes, he did. It's on Youtube and probably on one of his CDs for sale on the Corries Website. I think it sounds almost as good as the Corries' version; I haven't heard any other ones. I always enjoy Roy Williamson's expressive voice, whether comedy or melancholy lament, so I'm kind of partial to theirs. |
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14 Sep 12 - 06:48 PM (#3404812) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle Here's an old recording of the man himself singing it at a live gig - and I don't think anyone has mentioned so far that the tune is "Ghost Riders in the Sky". And yes, he was one of the crowd around Edinburgh in the 60s - and still is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8XT8oTcko0 |
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15 Sep 12 - 09:03 AM (#3405041) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Guest TF Bill Hill, writer of "Portree" is alive, well and a legendary Edinburgh City tour guide. If Bill doesn't know something about old Edinburgh, it's not worth knowing. The song is available on CD along with a lot of equally scurrilous songs from; edinburghtourguide.co.uk".In Bill's version you get all the verses as well. He is a most entertaining companion and a very dear friend. Not of mine but surely somewhere..... |
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15 Sep 12 - 05:05 PM (#3405261) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: it'smagic @GUEST,Guest TF: Can you give us that url for Bill's site again? It didn't work with www in front. I got connected to the invasive, annoying iamwired site, which gave me about 20 sites called edinburgh tour guide. I would love to go on one of his tours the next time I'm in Edinburgh. |
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16 Sep 12 - 07:35 AM (#3405554) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Guest TF. www.edinburghtourguide.co.uk. Or search Bill Hill in facebook should get you there. |
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16 Sep 12 - 07:40 AM (#3405555) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Guest TF While I'm on it, Bill and his, then, wife Jean sang in The Cairn Trio with the late Tom Smith in the late 60s early 70s. They toured with various versions of "The White Heather Show" and very good they were too. |
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16 Sep 12 - 07:44 AM (#3405557) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: maeve Here's the blue clicky: http://www.edinburghtourguide.co.uk/ |
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16 Sep 12 - 05:28 PM (#3405816) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Guest TF Sanku. |
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26 Jan 19 - 12:30 AM (#3973555) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,ActiusAquila Well, I've listened to the Corries version of this song and like the tune, but I'm neither from the UK nor American so I'm confused as to why it's a funny song... can anyone tell me why "curling stane" and "fresh air in a can" are so funny? |
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26 Jan 19 - 10:53 AM (#3973564) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle There are a lot of Scots words and references in it which might make it difficult for non-Scots to understand it all. A "curling stane" (stone) is a huge lump of granite, used for the on-ice sport of curling: you may have seen it in the Olympics.If you've ever tried lifting a curling stone you'll know how heavy it is! Maybe it's not funny to "gub" someone (hit them over the head) but it would be a heavy weapon if you did! "Fresh air in a can" just refers to the sort of con tricks that can be played on tourists - "take a bit of Scotland back with you". Believe that if you will! The tune is, as I said way back up the thread, from "Ghost Riders in the Sky". |
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28 Jan 19 - 08:01 PM (#3973895) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Sol Re. Micca's post. I've always understood that'a teuchter' (pronounced 'choochter' - the 'ch' as in 'loch')is someone who resides in the countryside. i.e. not a city or town dweller. (N. Americans would say 'someone from the Boondocks') The Portreeve Kid is riddled with Scots words that non-Scots might not grasp. e.g. Cowped = spilled or knocked over. Nyaff = dislikeable common person Gub = to strike someone on the face. |
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29 Jan 19 - 03:35 AM (#3973913) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Joe Offer I posted a message to this thread in desperate cluelessness in 2008. I got the impression must be some sort of backwoods place, deep in the wilderness of savage Scotland. Well, I went to Portree on the Isle of Skye in 2015, and I loved it. This photo (click) may be visible to you if you're logged into Facebook....or not. But I liked Portree, and bought my favorite "mouthie" there. -Joe- |
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29 Jan 19 - 06:17 AM (#3973939) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Jack Campin Portree wasn't exactly buzzing when I was there last (not long after this song was written) - I think that's the point. I feel the same as Susanne - most of the Corries' attempts at humour don't quite work, but this one does. |
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29 Jan 19 - 07:27 PM (#3974059) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle And my husband was at a Burns supper (all male event) last weekend, where the legendary Bill Hill was one of the guests and regaled them with some more of his parody/poetry. |
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30 Jan 19 - 08:06 PM (#3974204) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST Is the Corrie's version not the original? |
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31 Jan 19 - 12:11 PM (#3974247) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,kenny No - the "original" would be by the guy who wrote it - Bill Hill, although I don't know for definite who recorded the song first. I was thinking about Bill last week while hearing "Tae A Haggis" - Bill had a brilliant parody, "Tae A Mealie Pudden". |
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17 Feb 19 - 04:23 AM (#3977252) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: Tattie Bogle And at another Burns supper last night (mixed company this time!) Bill gave us his take on "Veganuary" - basically there wouldn't be much left of your traditional Burns supper meal left once you take out all the non-vegan items! |
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02 Mar 19 - 01:07 PM (#3979871) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Naina Tal Personally liked the original best (Bill Hill's) Much funnier. I have it on vynil somewhere. Point of this post though, is that The Corries cut some verses from it. Anyone have the full lyric? |
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12 Mar 19 - 08:51 AM (#3981635) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: The Portree Kid, which version? From: GUEST,Guest Somewhere at home my wife has a recording of Bill Hill's "Police Record" (recorded at a police social club in Edinburgh in the seventies or eighties, which has both The Portree Kid and To a Mealie Pudden on it (along with other tracks). It also contains a nice introduction to the Portree Kid explaining the similarity between the Wild West and the West of Scotland. (e.g. The Wild West has the Texas Rangers, we have the Glasgow Rangers). The Corries omit two verses, at least, from The Portree Kid. I suspect that it is because of the references they contain. The first one (third verse) is something along the lines of: They....(something or other I can't remember), Called in at Fort Augustus for to join the Cavalry, At the Heughmagandie Tearooms, they stopped off for a bite, And at Black Jock MacPhee's Hotel, they stopped off for the night. Then second last verse.. (from memory) My God cried Jock, "Tam, get your pipes and play outside the door, Put up the Monarch o' the Glen while I clean up the floor, Portree, put out the ashtrays made out of scallop shells, Hide a' the decent whisky, and get out Haigs and Bells" The latter verse would affect potential sponsorship, while the former has the Scots word Heughmagandie which I won't bother to translate, but some people might know. |
