The Sinking by Micca (verse 4 by Dave the ancient mariner)
 (Tune:  Fiddler's Green) 
 

I went on a package to Thailand last year 
To visit the night-spots and try the Thai beer 
I heard all my comrades after nights on the booze 
Complaining out loud as they made for the loos 

Chorus:
I'm going to whoop my cookies 
I'm going to spew my ring 
The turmoil intestinal's 
Worse than the Maelstrom 
And there's no soft tissue at the Holiday Inn 

It wasn't the whiskey it wasn't the gin 
It wasn't the ice cubes that floated within 
It was not Delhi belly or the plague that's bubonic 
We all went down with the Thai tonic.

Chorus

I don't want a gin with ice and a slice 
The memories it brings back are not very nice 
I spent half my hols in the bog on my own  
and flew back to Gatwick seated on the throne 

Chorus

I've just had another, followed through from a fart 
I felt like I shit out a Donkey and cart 
They said don't drink the water my God its not true 
Don't eat or drink anything's what you should do 

Chorus

I'll never go back to South Asia again 
I left half my insides afloat in a klong 
The weather is lovely the temples are free 
But sinking Thai tonic is too much for me