Charley, I opened this thread at around 7:00 this morning and started right out putting together my contribution. I had to put it on the back burner though (I'm at work). When I came back to it, I read your great contribution. Just want you to know, my use of the phrase, "...in a right pickle" is an honest coincidence and not any attempt to steal your words.   

Borrowed tune: She'll Be Comin' 'Round The Mountain

I'm a Slovak by the name of Richard Krahl,
And on me this high adventure did befall,
Well, I'm lucky that I'm here,
And I owe my life to beer,
Now here's my tale, as best I can recall.   

I was drivin' 'round the mountain in my car,
I was drivin' 'round the mountain in my car,
In my Audi I was going,
And Lord, how it was snowing!
I was drivin' 'round the mountain in my car.

I got buried in an avalanche of snow
I got buried in an avalanche of snow
When I realized what hit me,
I knew no one'd come to git me,
'Cause my whereabouts nobody'd ever know.

Well, I sat there all alarmed and filled with fear,
And I thought, "You're in a real pickle here!"
Then I rolled down the window,
Tried to use my hands to scoop snow,
Which was futile, so I quit and had a beer.

I had with me sixty bottles of that brew,
And as I sat and pondered what to do,
I drank one, and then another,
And then I thought, "Oh bother!
When I need a pee, what am I going to do?!"

Then a plan began to take shape in my brain,
The more I drink, the more I'll need to drain,
I recalled, once in a blizzard,
When I had to "drain the lizard",
Where I peed, it left a melted, yellow stain.

So, I set about in earnest to get free,
I drank and drank until I had to pee,
When I pissed, the snow would melt,
And even though it smelt,
I kept going out of sheer necessity.

Just as my beer supply was running low,
I had pissed my way through 15 feet of snow,
Stumbling legless down the pass,
I kept on falling on my ass,
Then a rescue team conveyed me down below.