LOL! I'd forgotten some of these (Have you seen the back of your neck? What a classic!)

My mother's favourites..

"Ach, haud yer whist" (be quiet)
"Ach, it's far aff yer backside, ye willnae sit on it" (anything painful that you complained about)
"Yer neither sugar no salt, ya willnae melt" (for when complaining about getting wet)
"Who rattled your cage?" (For when you bothered her about anything...)
"Get that lip aff the flair" (for when you weren't happy for whatever reason)
"You'll be laughing on the other side of yer face in a minute" (General threat of violence.. *G*)
"You're a clatty bugger" (for despairing at your general state)
"What did your last slave die of?"

Aren't mothers wonderful...? LOL!