Hah! Mormons may offer a planet but your Jesus offers a place next to him and his old man through the pearly gates. We can offer ten mins with Betty Swollox. If you survive that, Dave will make you a plate of chips and black pudding. Still with us? I'll get the karaoke machine out and give you my rendition of Dancing Queen. And don't forget, we give you fully unredeemable air miles with your weekly subscriptions. Bloody established religions. No marketing . Except of course when exploiting poor countries.
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