Homer and Jethro made a good song called CHILD PSYCHOLOGY

When Ma and Pa was fast asleep and I'd start to squall
They'd grab me by my tiny feet and bang me agin' the wall
When I started cuttin' teeth and when I'd start to whine
They'd massage my little gums with good ol' turpentine

::chorus::
I wish that you could see, the way they treated me
I wish my folks had known about that child psychology

And when I got on their nerves and they could stand no more
Well, they'd just get the hammer and nail me to the floor
They'd pick me up and baby me when I'd start to yell
They'd tie a rock around my neck and throw me in the well

::chorus::

When they'd put me in the tub no one would ever see
If the water was too hot hot or was too cold for me
If I turned blue it was too cold they didn't care alot
They always knew that I'd turn red if the water was too hot

'course irony's a dangerous thing in the hands of children (drunks) and hillbilly singers.

HTML line breaks added --JoeClone, 2-Oct-01.