Man...I go off to the beach for a few days, and I miss a thread like this?! Why is it that when I'm here all we do is snipe at each other, and when I leave, all the good stuff happens? Is this some kind of comment on me, y'all? :)
Anyway, my whining aside...practical uses for Spaw. I think he'd be a great superhero. "SPAWMAN!!! Saving the world from Self-Importance, Self-Righteousness, and Stupidity!" See? It's fun to say. Lots of nice alliteration. He could have a dulcimer for a weapon and a possum for one of those little companion deals like Falcor's falcon. I'm thinking he'd be kinda like SpaceGhost, complete with the Spank Ray. That's practical, right?