Here they are:

SHAVING CREAM

Benny Bell

I have a sad story to tell you,
It may hurt your feelings a bit,
Last night when I walked into my bathroom,
I stepped in a big pile of

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.

I think I'll break off with my girlfriend,
Her antics are queer I'll admit,
Each time I say "Darling, I love you"
She tells me that I'm full of

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.

Our baby fell out of the window,
You'd think that her head would be split;
But good luck was with her that morning:
She fell in a barrel of

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.

An old lady died in a bathtub,
She died from a terrible fit,
In order to fulfil her wishes,
She was buried in six feet of

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.

When I was in France with the army,
One day I looked into my kit,
I thought I would find me a sandwich,
But the darn thing was loaded with

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.

And now, folks, my story is ended:
I think it is time I should quit.
If any of you feel offended,
Stick your head in a barrel of

Shaving cream, be nice and clean,
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.
DMS

We always thought it was really funny, too, and as close as we dared to get to saying a real 'swear word!'

Denise:^)