While I recognize that plagiarism is a form of flattery and appreciate the implied compliment, I see no reason for you to get the credit and/or take the blame* for my "You might be a Super-Patriot if..."
As background, it was written for another forum as a satirical comment to some of the conservatives there (who make most of the conservatives here look like bleeding heart liberals).
However, in the spirit of equal time for all:
You might be an Left Wing Liberal Nut if....... . 1. The only flag you owned prior to 9/11 was the UN Flag and it still is. 2. When you went into buy a flag, you were outraged that Wal-Mart wasn't carrying Taliban Flags and planb to organize a protest. 3. You don't know what the 13 stripes or 50 stars are for but you are sure they are symbolic of oppression and war-mongering. 4. You think the purpose of Memorial and Veterans Day is to glorify war. You usually wear a black armband for all the innocents unjustly murdered and fly a Peace flag. 5. You have been registered to vote since you were old enough. 6. You have never had to serve on a jury as your impassioned speech explaining why the jury system was part of the plot by white males to oppress people of color. 7. You refuse to give blood because of a boycott against the company that makes the needles.. 8. You support the Bill of Rights but are sure the penumbra of rights includes a prohibition against war-mongering conservative, big-money white males being allowed any rights at all. Other than paying for social programs. 9. You think that anyone who agrees with the president should be deported. 10. You are registered to vote but you have never voted as a symbolic protest against the oppressive, racist establishment that discriminates against the victimized poor and people of color. 11. You worry a lot about dependence of Mid East Oil while you drive to the Rally for Feminists Against War in your SUV. Alone. Because your spouse needed stop at Public on the way home and you didn't want to have to wait. 12. You think "My Country Right or Wrong" is silly because it's impossible for the US to be right.. 13. You think that the solution is to engage in meaningful dialogue with the al qaeda and to begin by offering full reparations for all past wrongs and future ones as well. 14 The Star Spangled Banner is a jingoistic, hard to sing song that glorifies war and the oppression of people of color everywhere. As a Nation we should allow each distinct ethnic or interest group there own National Anthem at all public events and include a period of silence for those to whom all anthems are offensive. 15. You think radical/liberal internet sites are a reliable source of information about American History. Extra credit if you get ALL your ideas from Noam Chomsky and approved feminists sites. 16. You fully support the statement: "What's wrong with America is male dominated capitalism " 17. You think that what we really need to do is make all white anglo-saxon males pay reparations to anyone who feels they have been victimized. Those members of minorities who don't feel they are victims are in denial and need to be counseled and helped to understand the extent of their victimization 18. You know exactly where Afghanistan is. In fact, you know the physical address of the UN aid mission to Kabul. You aren't too sure about where the local homeless shelter is but wish all those tacky homeless sorts wouldn't hang around the peace rally.
* Your "I was just trying to protect you" argument won't hold water.