Speaking of "Courtin' In The Kitchen", as I did a few entries above, started me musing! And hence …

COORTIN' WITH TWO KITTENS
Come Nordic bach-el-ores and to me pay attention
Don't ever mess with whores, they're the devil's own invention
We enquired as to the price, it only cost a pittance
And therefore in a trice we were coortin' with two kittens
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

It was eighty years ago, my mother entered labour
My elder brother, Joe, looked on his bro' with favour
And since that fateful day, we've never once been parted
And together all the way, we've never yet been thwarted
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

Our house-guests were sublime, built like two fashion models
And so, before much time, we set to kiss and cuddle
Although long in the tooth, the pair of us were smitten
Bowled over, that's the truth, by the coortin' of two kittens
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

It was on and off the bed and round and round the house, sir
A flash of firm, young leg and a bit of mouth-to-mouth, sir
I felt so energised - 'tween my teeth I had the bit in -
By the sight of long white thighs as we coorted with two kittens
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

The miles upon our clocks began to tell a tale, sir
The girls began to mock as our stamina did fail, sir
"I must now respose, it would be far more fittin'
Than rippin' off the clothes and coortin' with two kittens"
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

We're in the land of Nod; the girls go on a spree, sir
I vow unto my God such a sight you'll never see, sir
They robbed we brothers blind, every furnishin' and fittin'
There was damn all left behind after coortin' with two kittens
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy

Me wallet it was cleaned, me biscuit tin was robbed, sir
I'm sure those lovebirds preened at the thought of such a job, sir
Never more again, will I let meself be bitten
No more I'll play the game of coortin' with two kittens
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye, with me too-rye-too-rye-addy
With me too-rye-too-rye-aye and me too-rye-too-rye-addy