BS: wit

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 17 Sep 04 - 09:05 PM

You know we wouldn't want to do half a job...

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Joe_F
Date: 17 Sep 04 - 06:17 PM

You folks, you're a wit & a half, you are.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: pdq
Date: 17 Sep 04 - 11:27 AM

Sign in front of house in Florida:

             1    Charley
             2    Frances
             3    Ivan
             4    SALE

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 16 Sep 04 - 08:29 PM

half-

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: RichM
Date: 16 Sep 04 - 03:47 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 05:20 PM

Sorry, Marion, I guess I am just part of the dumbing down of America. Of course I meant a $30 bag. Foot-in-mouth disease, I guess.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Marion
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 03:54 PM

Dave O., I've got to ask:

Was substituting "30 pound bag of groceries" for "30 dollar bag" just a mistake, or was it an allusion to Kendall's pun about England and America merging (in title of other thread)?

If the latter, well done.

Marion

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: GUEST,Larry K
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 03:53 PM

My uncle in Canada used that grocery line 30 years ago.   I have used it numerous times since.   I think it is very funny.

Wit and humor are being lost.   Part of it is the dumbing down of society.   I think it started with Roseanne and the numerous spin offs who showed the lower side of society.    (Married With Children, Simpsons, South Park)   There is also the dumbing down of society in the work force.   Try asking a clerk to make change without the cash register.    If a bill comes to $7.52 and you give the clerk two pennies, they are completely lost.

I think some of the loss of with has to do with political correctness.    You can't tell a joke in the workplace without fear of losing your job.    I am far more likely to be fired for a bad joke than for doing a bad job.   What is funny to 99 people is offensive to one person and that seems to be all that matters.

Not surprising, that humor and wit are lost.    It has never stopped me however.   When my company promoted my last radio appearance this past week, they said I was known for my "offbeat humor"   I was proud.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: GUEST,amergin
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 03:32 PM

DaveO, yep and each time it was probably told by Kendall... ;)

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 12:22 PM

I have a different take on Kendall's 30-pound bag of groceries and the lack of response.

The checkout person had heard it five hundred times before. Pretty hard to consider it funny.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 11:52 AM

Robin 1 ted 37!

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 11:34 AM

100!
Got One!

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 11:33 AM

99

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 11:16 AM

98

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: robomatic
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 10:38 AM

I read a book called "Out Of Step" which is not about wit or humor only the writer remembered Berlin as a witty place in the 20's. He said he was walking down the street and suddenly one of the passing autos blew a tire. Without stopping, some anonymous pedestrian said: "gesundheit!"

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 10:25 AM

96. At least I am giving you a chance!

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Paco Rabanne
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 09:20 AM

95.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Chris Green
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 06:59 AM

Churchill again.

"Mr Churchill, if I were your wife I would put poison in your coffee"

"Madam, if I were your husband, I'd drink it!"

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: jonm
Date: 15 Sep 04 - 02:36 AM

another Churchill, Nancy Astor again I think:

"Sir, I do believe you are drunk."

"And you are ugly, madam. But tomorrow I shall be sober."

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 14 Sep 04 - 01:47 PM

Sir Winston Churchill was himself quite a wit...Lady Astor, in annoyance at something he had said told him....."Mr Churchill, if I was your wife I would put poison in your drink"...Churchill replied.."Madam, if I were your husband I'd drink it!".
Best wishes.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Sep 04 - 01:18 PM

Did you ever hear about the lawyer that was an asshole? He talked alot of shit.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: pdq
Date: 13 Sep 04 - 06:05 PM

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside-down, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300 C. The Russians used a pencil. Your tax dollars at work!

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Midchuck
Date: 13 Sep 04 - 05:48 PM

Next asshole tells a lawyer joke, I'm gonna start telling asshole jokes, just to let you know how it feels to be picked on.

But I forget. An asshole is always getting picked on.

P.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: pdq
Date: 13 Sep 04 - 05:27 PM

Want to know the real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse? You cannot post "Thou Shall Not Lie", "Thou Shall Not Steal" and "Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment!

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 10 Jun 04 - 07:47 AM

The Local Community TV station played "Hellzapoppin'" (1941) tonight - the TV mag critic really dumped on it - but if you want to see what was once considered the best humour of the period - basically an expanded film version based on the original 'Music hall' stage play - complete with lots of 'Panto' style gags (including the guy wandering around trying to deliver the pot plant to Mrs Jones) - it is well worth the time. They also 'break the frame' a fair bit - and it predates much 'theatre of the absurd' - especially 'The Goon Show' - in 1941 the members were all still in the military and may indeed have seen this movie before they started on their own careers.

This was well before TV - the styles and expectations of humour have changed markedly since then, with one exception - the fast wisecrack...

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: kendall
Date: 10 Jun 04 - 07:33 AM

It's the "Herd instinct" maybe?

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Sam L
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 08:20 PM

No. It's always pathetic. People just don't notice so much when it's funny.

The most pathetic though is all those theatre jokes where people laugh just to congratulate themselves for getting a reference. I don't want to spoil college-kid fun, but you get tired of Blah blah blah, Camus (or whoever) Ha ha! (I've read that.)

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 02:00 PM

It's an mp3 file so can be played on several free media programs.

Windows Media Player (once at the download page look for the program)

Apple's Quick Time Player (plays in Windows and PC computers)

I don't want to be a pest, but we're all waiting around with baited breath until we hear your virtual snort of laughter over this little song.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Amos
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 12:03 PM

Try downloading and installing Quicktime player, Kendall. Then go back and hit the link again.

A

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: kendall
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 11:55 AM

No


(Brevity is the soul of wit)

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 08:43 AM

Kendall, were you ever able to hear that song? I didn't name it because I wanted to surprise you when it popped up on your screen, but it's called "Fuck the FCC" and takes off from there. You'll particularly appreciate what he does with the concept Fuck and the names Dick and Cheney. :) I think he illustrates great political wit in that song.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: DMcG
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 08:11 AM

Ok, this is good example of off-the-cuff wit, I think. At 09.04 I send this email to a friend:

"I've just got a request for a reference for you.

About that interest-free loan we discussed."

At 09.07 I got an email back

"I thought it was an interesting discus you loaned me."

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Mr Red
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 07:45 AM

As a serial jokist I find some will always fall on stony ground.
The only "retrieve" is to smile to which I sometimes add "I also tell jokes".
I still don't win 'em all - some people are just humorous in different ways and others have the weight of the world on their shoulders right now and some is just miserable gits.

FWIW I am sure I have visited all three domains myself at some point.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 07:36 AM

You know Kendall, we don't think all that different at times.... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: kendall
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 06:16 AM

Wit and humor are not the same thing. Being able to remember and repeat a joke is one thing, but coming out with a snappy retort is quite another.
The only thing worse than dealing with someone who has no sense of humor, is dealing with someone who THINKS he does, and is actually quite pathetic.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 05:37 AM

Then there was the fellow who walked into a cardiologist's waitng room. The doctor asked what was wrong with him, and he answered.
"I'm a moth."
"You're a moth?"
"Yup."
"You really think you're a moth?"
"Yup."
"Buty this is a cardiologist's waiting room."
"Yup."
"So why didn't you go into the psychiatrist next door?"
"Your light was on."

Sorry about that.............

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 09 Jun 04 - 12:31 AM

You can look in the Second Joke Thread for 2004 for more humour.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Amos
Date: 04 Jun 04 - 12:33 PM

LEARNING

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which
we are permitted to remain children all our lives.

                      Albert Einstein

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Amos
Date: 04 Jun 04 - 11:06 AM

Eric Idle's Song.

I have tested this link in Internet Explorer and it goes directly to a Quicktime-play page and starts playing the song.

A

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 04 Jun 04 - 10:55 AM

It works on my system--do you have a program available to play mp3 files? Try opening your Windows Media Player or QuickTime Player and direct it to this address. I think you'll enjoy it.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: kendall
Date: 04 Jun 04 - 07:15 AM

your link doesn't work

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 04 Jun 04 - 03:15 AM

Hey Kendall, I think Eric Idle's wit is exactly what many Mudcatters are looking for these days: http://www.pythonline.com/plugs/idle/FCCSong.mp3

(adult content)

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Cuilionn
Date: 03 Jun 04 - 10:48 PM

Oddball singer Jonathan Richman has a great song that relates to all this, the title o which is something like, "I've got a great sense of humor but she doesn't laugh at my jokes." The song is about... oh, never mind!

Here are a few (possibly misremembered) lines from J.R.'s song:

"Now she's in the kitchen, gettin' breakfast cereal,
And I'm out there borin' her with my comic material.
She's there cookin' up eggs and yolks,
And I'm there cookin' up hot, hot jokes..."

"Maybe I should call up someone serious, like Jean-Luc Goddard,
And say, 'Pardon, but makin' her laugh is too hard!
Maybe I should call up someone intelligent like Albert Camus,
And say, "I got some hot, hot jokes I wanna try on vous...
'Cause I'VE...got a great sense of humor,
But SHE...won't laugh at my jokes."

It loses something on the page, but Jonathan's timing and delivery really are priceless... his show is the only live performance my brother and I have ever attended together and BOTH enjoyed. Jonathan has many other witty lyrics, most of which appear (subversively & deceptively) simplistic upon first perusal, then they sneak up on you from behind and make you snicker, grin, and suddenly double over laughing. Give him a listen sometime... lovely exercise!

--Cuilionn

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 May 04 - 11:25 PM

You're gambling we'll get your humor, making it a wit bet.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: matai
Date: 31 May 04 - 09:30 PM

'In New Zealand, wit is the opposite of dry' said Hrothgar

but our wit isn't wet like the wit in the Northern Hemisphere (-:
sorry that was a bit wet

matai

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Sam L
Date: 31 May 04 - 09:27 PM

Well, yeah Kendall, and f cuurse that was my point, smetimes people aren't in the mood.

But one of my lost jokes involved a minimalist sculpture by Sol Lewitt we were installing at a museum and my boss asked if I remembered what the title of this one was, to put up the signs for each piece. It was untitled, but I told him it was "Brevity"--because brevity is the Sol Lewitt. Nothing. Oh well. Same day, Is that an Eric Fischl? I think it is, I check the sign, yes, it's "official".

We had adapters for the track lighting, and during a lng difficult installation the same guy was walking around looking for some and muttering "there's got to be some more adapters"! I said What, Bill? There's got to be a morning after? Nothing. No, I said we need more adapters.

Oh well, it's all right.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: kendall
Date: 31 May 04 - 07:35 PM

I've met many who just don't get it, and they often resent their lack of wit like it was my fault.
BTW, I was baiting Doug. He didn't bite. He must be smarter than I thought.

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Amos
Date: 31 May 04 - 06:19 PM

Yeah, but in the original story, Kendall's humor was quite sufficient to have gotten at least a grin, so Doug's remark was off target. I have a better explanation. The clerk at the grocery store was laughing inside but she was afraid Kendall would hit on her if she let it show.

Ya think maybe?

So much for my advanced sociological theories!!

:>)


A

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: bflat
Date: 31 May 04 - 06:03 PM

I think it depends on intelligence. And, Amos has made a good point about television and prepackaging and hypnosis. So, do dullards laugh?

Subject: RE: BS: wit
From: Peter K (Fionn)
Date: 31 May 04 - 05:47 PM

On the subject of after-dinner speeches, Barry Crier (of BBC Radio 4 notoriety) recalled being at a formal dinner where the guest speaker lost all track of time, and rambled on for what seemed like hours. A be-costumed chief barker had to stand to attention behind the top table throughout the interminable performance, and eventually began to sway alarmingly, as though about to faint. At last he could take no more of this torment. In desperation he seized a cermonial mace that graced the table, intending to bring it down on the head of the speaker. But as he was about to strike, he stumbled on the microphone flex, and the mace came down across the back and shoulders of an elderly man whose misfortune it was to be sitting at the top table. The old man slid under the table, apparently unconcious. People rushed to his aid, only to hear him groaning: "Hit me again - I can still hear the bastard."