BS: Richard III

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: EBarnacle
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 08:55 PM

In NYC, male or female, they get called meter maids. We don't respect them either.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 12:41 PM

True, Michael, but I've never heard them habitually called 'Meter Maids' by anyone other than tabloid journalists. I've heard them called a lot of other names though! 😄

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 12:33 PM

'Nor do we have 'Meter Maids', that description was a figment of Macca's imagination! We have Traffic Wardens who hand out tickets, not citations, and they patrol on foot (occasionally on a bicycle).'
.,,.,
Not entirely a figment, or an invention of P McCartney's own -- "Meter Maid" was an idiomatically accepted, somewhat facetious, tabloid-press-style nickname for a female traffic warden, which was Macca's reference.

≈M≈

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 11:01 AM

"Parking-control car: in which, for example, Lovely Rita Metah Maid would cruise the curbs and hand out citations."

Nope, we don't have pawkin' control cars cruisin' the kerbs, Leenia. Nor do we have 'Meter Maids', that description was a figment of Macca's imagination! We have Traffic Wardens who hand out tickets, not citations, and they patrol on foot (occasionally on a bicycle).

Now repeat after me..."They don't have parking control cars in the UK, they don't have parking control cars in the UK, they don't have parking....zzzzzzzz! 😄😄👍

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 10:54 AM

Ah, my dear, I was actually given Now We Are Six on my sixth birthday -- 12 May 1938. Have still got it. And can when provoked, recite The Knight Whose Armour Didn't Squeak right through!

≈M≈

Wherever I am there's always Pooh
There's always Pooh and me

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 08:54 AM

Okay, MGM. (It's nice to know that others here know of the Hums of Pooh.)
============
Parking-control car: in which, for example, Lovely Rita Metah Maid would cruise the curbs and hand out citations.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 03:55 AM

Tap the rhythm out, Leeneia, and I think you'll identify the tune. I can't offhand think of a Hum·Of·Pooh that has that precise cadence.

≈M≈

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 31 Mar 15 - 02:31 AM

Leeneia, it was a pukka Police Car - we don't have 'parking control cars' (whatever they are!) here. And our police cars are smaller and considerably more agile than those barges-on-wheels that your police have. 😄😄

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 11:19 PM

I believe that is usually develops that way - starts in adolescence.

As for the money spent on Richard's funeral, the video of his funeral cortege shows two motorcycle cops (possibly off duty), two knights on horseback, about four black cars, and little car in blue and yellow, marked "Police." I suspect the Police car was a parking control car with a peel-off sign stuck on. All that was organized by the Richard III Society, not the government.

When we compare Richard's funeral with the cost of a royal wedding, Mardi Gras or New York's St Patrick's Day parade, the cost was piffling. And it gave something to talk about besides Jeremy Clarkson.
===================
Re: ♩♩pom tiddy pom tiddy pom pom pom
    pom pom pom pom tiddy tiddy pom pom♫

Is that a quotation from Winnie the Pooh or is it "Arkansas Traveller"?

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: EBarnacle
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 02:51 PM

When we preparing to act R III, this past Summer, I realized that the first line sets the stage for the entire play. His use of the word "our" is an adoption of the "Royal We," showing his intent to become king over everyone else's prior rights to the crown.

A history I read this past year indicates that the scoliosis did not begin until his adolescence.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Don Firth
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 12:16 PM

Guest, I was not really responding to you.

It seemed like an appropriate opportunity to counter the popular misconception that Richard III was a "hunchback," a la Quasimodo. The skeleton clearly shows that he had a severe scoliosis. That can be uncomfortable in the best of times and very painful in the worst of times, and can tend to make one a little cranky....

"Now is the winter of our discontent....", i.e., "My back is killin' me!"

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 11:50 AM

Don - he wasn't really a 'turd' either, research shows he was in reality a human being ...

but do jokes need to care about facts ???

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Don Firth
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 11:20 AM

According to the skeleton, Richard III was not really a "hunchback," but suffered from a severe scoliosis--lateral curvature of the spine.

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 11:03 AM

Was it people constantly calling him Richard the turd that gave him the hump ???

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 10:53 AM

Was he King of Ireland as well - if so he would have been Richard the Turd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: EBarnacle
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 10:39 AM

If you wish to visit now that his tomb is unveiled--

http://artdaily.com/news/77494/-Car-park-king--Richard-III-s-tomb-revealed-#.VRlrvWdFDcs

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 08:34 AM

Yes, Arkansas, the state, is pronounced "Arkansaw."

But the river named Arkansas is the Ar-KANN-zus River.
I don't know whether the state was named after the river
or vice versa.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 04:39 AM

Re Arkansas -- Maybe only the final s is suppressed, & I suppose it could be argued that the distortion of the penultimate a has precedent in 'although and also and all'. But not convincingly IMO, leeneia.

≈M≈

Let's go travellin'

♩♩pom tiddy pom tiddy pom pom pom
    pom pom pom pom tiddy tiddy pom pom♫

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 04:35 AM

100

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,Andiliqueur
Date: 30 Mar 15 - 04:24 AM

I would never base your knowledge of history on the UK Guardian! The Ceremony was comparitively simple by London Standards and hopefully will be justified by benefits to Leicester's economy. It has not been and probably cannot be proven that he killed his nephews. His name is woven into the history of Leicester by street mames,schools and pubs etc. We (I was born here) have always kept him and it is right that he should be reinterred in a Holy Place within a few yards of the site in which he has lain for over 500 years.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,Pauline Lerner
Date: 29 Mar 15 - 10:48 PM

My source of info for the following is The Guardian UK, a very up-to-date, thorough, and liberal newspaper. DNA analysis has uncovered a problem with Richard III's heritage. It was discovered by analysis of mitochondrial DNA, which is maternally inherited, as well as nuclear DNA, which comes from both parents and is the kind usually analyzed. At some point in history before Richard III, the paternal line was changed, but the maternal line was not. One of the kings was cuckolded. After that, none of the kings was descended from the king at the top of the original paternal line.

A very large sum of money was spent to move the royal casket from the parking lot to the church, have a big burial ceremony, and reinter Richard III. The newspaper gave some good reasons why too much money was spent. (1) England is now in a state of fiscal austerity. (2) Richard III was not a nice guy. He had two nephews who had better rights to be king than he did, so he had them locked in the Tower of London and then killed. (3) There is a controversy over which church he should be buried in.

I'm glad that in my country we have no kings, just dirty politicians.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 29 Mar 15 - 07:22 PM

Whaddya mean? I meant Norlins, a tiny village just outside Bude. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 29 Mar 15 - 04:47 PM

Yes, MGM Lion, I forgot about Arkansas. Actually, it only skips one letter, the final s.

Steve Shaw: don't say Norlins unless your family has lived there a long time, perhaps without learning to read.    The rest of us say New Or-lens.

What do we know about the music played at Richard III's funeral?

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 04:40 PM

Norlins.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 04:28 PM

Arkansas? Ah-kin-saw...

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 02:58 PM

Thanks, Steve. I don't think there are many American names where people simply disregard consonants or even whole syllables like that.

We do have Blytheville, which rhymes with Bible. It's in Arkansas.
I helped build a power line there.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: HuwG
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 01:41 PM

Comedian Bob Monkhouse once worried that in Mousehole (pronounced "Mowzle"), he would be introduced as "Bob Mucus".

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: BrendanB
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 09:22 AM

How about,
Cambois
Alnmouth
Sedbergh
Berwick

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Acorn4
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 09:17 AM

"Dick the Shit"

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 06:51 AM

Lanson
Froom
Woolzery
Bister
Rowter ("row" as in we had a nasty row when I got home drunk last night)
Mowzle
Ozzletwizzle
Oltringum
Lee
Annick
St Teth
Polzeth

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 28 Mar 15 - 06:37 AM

goes to the tune - its a jolly holiday with mary

Oh I done a great big Richard in the khasi Mary!
I done a Richard, then I had a wee!
Tiddly tiddly tum! then I wiped me bum!
Chim Chimminy chim chim cheree!

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 10:25 PM

I give up, Steve. Tell me how to say them.
=========
Meanwhile, there has been a perhaps-inevitable development:

"The living relatives of Richard III, the last English king to perish in battle, are now faced with a bill of over £100,000 from Leicester City Council for a parking space the monarch occupied for well over five hundred years.

A spokesman for the council said: 'We don't care who you are; you can't avoid Hawkeye Parking Enforcement sensors. Given that Richard arrived at the site about half a millennium before we installed the system, we didn't clock him arriving, but we saw the whole exhumation thing. He's been down there for ages. We are fully within our rights to issue parking fines retrospectively, even to those with alleged spinal disability."
===========
It was in the Newsbiscuit, so it must be true.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 06:00 PM

Try these:

Launceston
Frome
Woolfardisworthy
Bicester
Rough Tor
Mousehole
Oswaldtwistle
Altrincham
Leigh
Alnwick
St Teath
Polzeath

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 03:01 PM

Oh I done a great big Richard in the khasi Mary!
I done a Richard, then I had a wee!
Tiddly tiddly tum! then I wiped me bum!
Chim Chimminy chim chim cheree!

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 02:49 PM

I wonder if our American friends knew that a Richard is cockney rhymming slang for a turd?

as in - I done this big richard!

You can imagine Dick Van Dyke singing abaht that in Mary Poppins - at least I can! But thats my vivid imagination running away with me yet again.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Thompson
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 01:35 PM

My favourite depiction of Richard III is by Richard Dreyfuss in ≤i>The Goodbye Girl, in which the actor has been told to camp it up.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 06:06 AM

Rich III was in fact Duke of Gloucester, wasn't he -- that's "Gloster", not "Glau-cess-ta".

≈M≈

Some people can be very silly about pronunciations of names. I remember an American I knew at Cambridge who would always facetiously pronounce a S London suburb as "green" [like the colour] "witch" [like a hag on a broomstick], till I pointed out that they had pinched the name lock stock & barrel for the Village section of New York & seemed to have no difficulty saying it. He confessed he had never made the connection.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: OldNicKilby
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 05:41 AM

For Heavens sake, you say Leicester like " Les- tur M,Duck" As one whose ancestors were illegal immigrants, we came over from France in boats and the Chief Immigration Officer was right stroppy ,his name was Harold, so one of the lads shot the bugger in the eye with an arrow. So you pronounce it "Les- tur " M' Duck. For the un-initiated "M'Duck " is Anglo Saxon for "My friend "

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 03:26 AM

'Lie-chester'?

Yep, that's exactly how he pronounced it.

I did the decent friendly thing and gave our American visitor the correct directions.
Which was basically "you're close enough, just carry straight on a few more yards"

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 27 Mar 15 - 01:32 AM

How can it be 'Lie-chester'? There's no 'h' after the 'c', and the 'e' following the 'c' makes the 'c' soft. So, it can't be 'Lie-chester', but it could conceivably be 'Lie-sester'.

But it's neither, it's 'Lester'. Get over it. 😄

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: EBarnacle
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 11:46 PM

Richard da turd is now reinterred.

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/englands-richard-iii-finally-gets-burial-fit-for-a-king/ar-AAa1dzb?ocid=U218DHP

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Don Firth
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 12:11 PM

Gesundheit!!

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 09:29 AM

"Hey buddy, can you gimme directions to Lie-chester Square"

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 09:26 AM

Thanks, all. Now I know how to say "Leicester."

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 09:25 AM

Give him a velvet burial shroud. Then we can please those who want a nem mnemonic for the colours of the rainbow.
Richard Of York Gets/Got Buried In Velvet (or shift the burial to St Albans/Verulamium)

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 09:07 AM

Derek Brimstone told me one time he was driving Tim Hardin home from a gig, and they passed Loughborough on the motorway.

Tim wakes up from a pissed up slumber and sees the the sign and says...My God! we're passing Luger Borugah!

which i think is a better pronunciation than the official one.

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: GUEST,HuwG at work
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 09:03 AM

I personally enjoyed the production of Shakespeare's "Richard the Third" sponsored by Yeomans' Army and Navy Stores:

"Now is the discount of our winter tents..."

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Greg F.
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 07:20 AM

25 Mar 15 - 11:15 PM: Still waiting to learn how to pronounce 'Leicester.'

SEE: 25 Mar 15 - 08:49 AM

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Thompson
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 04:55 AM

leenia, say Leicester

Subject: RE: BS: Richard III
From: Will Fly
Date: 26 Mar 15 - 04:25 AM

Marry in Hastings - repent at Leicester.