Lyr Req: Touch of the Cock-Up Man's Hand (Houlden)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 07 May 08 - 02:54 PM

Gargoyle, you're welcome. Putting up one's kitchen's shelves is a fairly universal disaster, though, isn't it.....?

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: The Admiral
Date: 07 May 08 - 05:53 AM

We have fond memories of Dave Houlden at MFC - It's nice to see his songs still being sung....

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 07 May 08 - 05:33 AM

THANK YOU Kitty!!

Got the idea now - a good framework - will personalize it for the occasion and make the disasters local and better known to the audience.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: Leadfingers
Date: 06 May 08 - 08:38 PM

There has been some talk about a re printing of the Dave Houlden Song Book !

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 06 May 08 - 04:22 PM

One verse not complete, but here it is:


THE TOUCH OF THE COCK-UP MAN'S HAND – Dave Houlden

It was in quite good nick the old auctioneer
Thought it would sell rather well
And so he held up the me-lod-e-on
Which immediately started to sell

"Who'll start the bidding, good people" he cried
"Who'll start the bidding for me"
"A hundred dollars and who'll make it two
Two hundred and who'll make it three"

Three hundred dollars and going once
Going and gone, but stay
From the back of the room a denim clad man
Came remorselessly pushing his way

Undoing the straps on the me-lod-e-on
And giving the bellows a heave
He played a tune, a tune of the kind
That the devil would like, I believe

When the racket had finished the old auctioneer
With a face that was creased with a sigh
Then he held up the melodeon
(Dave got this verse wrong and didn't sing it again)

A reluctant dollar, a job to get two
A hell of a job to get three
Three dollars once, three dollars twice
"Going, gone" cried he

But the people all shouted and some of them cried
We do not quite understand
What changed its worth, quick came the reply
The touch of the cock-up man's hand

There's many an enterprise going quite well
Nothing could go wrong you'd say
Then the bottom drops out and you're right up the creek
As in selling this squeezebox today

Scott's last expedition, the R101
Putting up my kitchen shelves
The Tay Bridge disaster, the BL Mistro*
You can finish the list for yourselves

For the cock-up man comes and the foolish crowd
Never can quite understand
The power of a fool and the change that is wrought
By the touch of the cock-up man's hand

Words supplied by Bev and Chris Arscott

* Should this be "Maestro"?

Anyway, I hope it's sufficiently vinegary for your intended purpose!

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 06 May 08 - 04:05 PM

Gargoyle - the words are in the book of Dave's songs that members of Maidenhead folk club put together in 1994 ("I never meant to be taken literally"). There are 10 verses, which I'll post once I've typed them out!

Kitty

Subject: Lyr Req: Dave Houlden's 'Touch of the Cock'
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 06 May 08 - 03:53 PM

Only reference I can find to this song is in threads of "Master's Touch" and 'The Touch of the Cock Up Mans Hand' About a melodeon.

Only reference to In Memoriam Dave Houlden song book is in the same threads.

For a retirement dinner - all present allready know "The Master's Touch" - The Dave Houlden rendering might be the right touch of vinegar to offset the syrupy sweetness of gushing platitudes.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle