BS: Gun alternatives for home defense

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 11:17 PM

See, that's just it. If you gave Shame a good, steady job like that he'd just get all respectable and start driving a minivan. Before you know it he'd be married, have 3.4 children, live in the suburbs, and have a second job as an accountant. You're saving him from himself by keeping him unemployed.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 04:58 PM

"Whoever is first up in the morning turns up the furnace, lets the cat and/or dog out, and brings the dummy in off the porch"

A perfect job for Shane! He is a dummy, and he stays up all night and sleeps most of the day. He will be glad to hang out on your porch at night if you supply him with beer, pizza, and smokes. Furthermore, if you give him this job then he won't need to do B. and E.'s anymore to get money for his beer, pizza, and smokes, so you will be doing the rest of society a favor!

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: MMario
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 04:11 PM

"This property protected by attack trained SKUNK" signs

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: meself
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 04:06 PM

How 'bout going out just after dark and putting a dummy out on the front porch, sitting in a rocking chair with a fake shotgun cradled in its lap?

(Whoever is first up in the morning turns up the furnace, lets the cat and/or dog out, and brings the dummy in off the porch ....)

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 03:33 PM

I thought all fruitcakes were aged at least several years?

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 01:44 PM

My cello is formidible enough but a nice aged fruitcake is my weapon of choice.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Sep 09 - 11:38 AM

We're all crazy in some respect, I think... ;-)

However, I did know of a guy named "Crazy Bob" once in Toronto. He was a huge guy, bald with tattoos and a beard, he looked like a classic biker, and he WAS dangerous. Most people tended to avoid Crazy Bob. I'm not sure if he had any friends, but if he did they would also be people you would definitely tend to avoid if you had any sense at all.

For home defence against Crazy Bob, I would recommend the most extreme means possible...that is, guns, baseball bats, a really mean and large dog, a small tactical nuclear weapon, that sort of thing... ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: GUEST,crazy little woman
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 10:23 PM

' anyone who has the word crazy or something similar as a part of their name...'


There must be a lot more people than I thought who have never heard the song

Goin' to Kansas City, Kansas City, here I come.
They got some crazy little women there
and I'm gonna get me one.

one of many versions

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 09:51 AM

What happens in the UK if the defunct intruder just sort of disappeared? Wired to an anchor, say, and dropped into the briny deep? Or late one night a old grave in a old cemetery is carefully made into a duplex?

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Mooh
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 07:11 AM

Rosie The Wonder Dog is getting pretty miserable in her old age, but Cosmo The Other Dog is louder and scarier sounding.

I think a Telecaster or a banjo across the head might make for a more humourous retelling.

In the cartoons there was always a handy grand piano to fall on the bad guys. I want to know how to rig that up.

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Gurney
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 05:34 AM

Samurai swords seem to be effective, if the news from John Hopkins is right.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: bubblyrat
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 05:02 AM

In the UK,there are no alternatives to defending your home with a gun (which you will never be allowed to own anyway !), as it illegal to hurt ,injure,detain,or even mildly inconvenience an intruder,even one who is armed & dangerous.The police in Britain are specially trained to deal,often severely,with those householders who dare to even so much as lay a finger on any intruder,as it a) infringes their "rights" and b) constitutes an "assault" .....yes,just TOUCHING them !! For which you will be arrested,of course.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: kendall
Date: 16 Sep 09 - 04:56 AM

Thats a good one MarkS !

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: GUEST,MarkS (on the road)
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 10:39 PM

A sign in your yard saying:

"My neighbor does not believe in the right to bear arms"

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Bert
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 08:58 PM

Two dogs. A large one to tackle the burglar and a small one to wake the big one up.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 08:32 PM

Lock the doors - shut the windows (weather permitting - or get security grade [stainless steel doesn't cut too easily with knives!] fly screens) ... it's a good start... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 08:32 PM

How about scattering some human glue traps outside....maybe you can get 'em at Home Depot, or through PITA?
http://blog.peta.org/archives/2007/05/human_glue_trap.php

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: kendall
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 07:58 PM

I'm quite comfortable with my plan of action. A loaded .45 within arms reach.

I also happen to live in one of the safest states in the country.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 04:19 PM

The only true defense (or defence) is preparation. THINK about what you'll do if.... Visualize your actions. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and live somewhere in the middle.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: number 6
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 02:49 PM

Forget the motion lights, video cameras, beware of dog stickers ... have a security system installed ... the costs are worth it, if not for some peace of mind. We've had one installed.

If your too cheap to have a security system service, or you do not want to own a doberman pincher just get get hold of a some security service company stickers and paste them all over the outside of your house.

It's a bad, bad world out there kids.

biLL

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: kendall
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 02:40 PM

The problem with a safe room is you might not have time to get to it.
I have no desire to harm another person but if it's him or me. No contest.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 02:13 PM

I am glad this thread has been "expanded" to include passive defense measures. Pretty good link, Rap.

A few quick thoughts...
Peep holes in exterior and safe room doors.
I prefer dusk-to-dawn lights over motion sensor lights because we have trees here and, around this time of year, they fall and we also have a few cats, etc, around. Also, good lighting deters crooks BEFORE they get close.

A "No Soliciting" sign often prevents crooks, excepting the Jeezely Hovahs, from coming to the door for "casing the place". I never open the door for anyone I don't know. I look out the window and just shake my head "no".

I had a beware of dog sign on my garage and I have a large pet door repleat with a piece of 2" 100 grade chain attached to the garage that goes into the "door". I used to have the same type chain attached to the iron step railing at the front steps which ran to a hook mounted beside the door. I took the sign down because delivery peeps wouldn't come to the back door and the front door is often inaccessible in winter. The chain in front looked crappy.

I have a camcorder on a tripod pointed at the front room windows (I like to have them open in summer) and it's hooked to a VCR and the VCR has a coax cable running to a wall outlet. The light on the garage makes this visible at night.

Oh, yeah, almost forgot... I snore louder than a grizzly bear in a shock film.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 01:00 PM

There's good information on this site.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:51 PM

All ya' really need is a good naggin' womanz... I'll tell ya' what, the reason that my neighbor shoots at us from afar is that the sumabich has heard that the P-Vine will nag the warts off a toad... Sho nuff will...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: longboat (inactive)
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:39 PM

Nice ad for takedefense.org
and anyone who has the word crazy or something similar as a part of their name is generally as harmless as a 6 week old puppy. I think my cat could probably take GUEST,crazy little woman down *LOL*

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:29 PM

THAT'S another good reason not to watch television. I rarely watch it and usually it's the History Channel or the local weather.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: GUEST,crazy little woman
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 11:43 AM

Are you female?

Do you live in the U.S. or reasonably close to it?

Then take a self-defense class offered by the Ali Kemp Foundation:

takedefense.org

If you are not female, send a woman in the family to the class and ask what she learned.
========
Other thoughts:

Most murder victims were murdered by someone they knew.

Most murder victims had alcohol or illegal substances in their systems.

Most people's fear of crime correlates with the amount of TV they watch, not with the amount of danger in their lives.

So, if you are afraid, first determine whether your fear is realistic. Where does it come from?

If you are still scared, take a course, read some books, do something intelligent.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: longboat (inactive)
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 11:36 AM

One of these There have been a number of B&E artists (home invaders for the PC crowd)(second story men for those who......never mind...)who have had the s**t scared out of them when confronted by one these wee beasties

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 11:29 AM

A policeman at my church was asked what was the best alarm system, and he answered 'A small dog.'

He was perfectly serious, and I believe he's right.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: number 6
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 09:58 AM

A shillelagh

biLL

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: artbrooks
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 09:57 AM

AP news flash...Johns Hopkins U. student kills intruder with samurai sword.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Wesley S
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 09:55 AM

How about a starter pistol? It shoots blanks and makes plenty of noise. The bad guy hears and and runs away thinking that they were lucky to escape with their lives.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 09:44 AM

Probably because the bears can see or smell them, Ebbie. Humans, especially in the dark, aren't that smart.

But I ask yet again, how vicious do you want to get? Do you want to incapacitate or kill? Remember, legally you have to have control over what you use AND you cannot harm someone who is fleeing because then the threat is over (no longer "imminent").

You COULD surround your home with a moat filled with pirahnas (goldfish in Canada because they're nicer) and alligators (frogs in Canada), have a portcullis and an oubliette, "murder holes", and a poison gas spray. Outside you could put fougasse. But you might find it difficult to have friends over for an evening....

Personally, I prefer a nightstick or a section of wooden closet rod about 24 inches long (or a 3 or more D-cell Maglight). But I know how to use those. I can break the wrist of the hand holding the gun and then seriously injure, incapacitate, or even kill the person attacking me. No holes in the walls and furniture, no burn marks, no toxic chemical spills -- perhaps just a few of those pesky bloodstains which a little hydrogen peroxide can fix right up.

Whatever you select, you need the will to use it. You KNOW you will injure or kill another human being -- oven cleaner in the face is probably going to blind the person, as is paint or car starting fluid (if they're smoking that could also set them on fire). Could you live with yourself knowing that you robbed someone of their sight or permanently crippled them? Could you live with the idea that you inadvertently took the life of another, even if you were cleared of wrongdoing by the law?

People are taught from childhood, from infancy, that hurting or killing others is wrong. If you cannot overcome this conditioning to the extent that you would attack someone all out, no holds barred, no quarter given, if you are attacked -- AND you are willing to learn to use your chosen "weapon" effectively and without hesitation -- don't do it. Invest instead in a set of GOOD locks, GOOD doors and a cell phone.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: 3refs
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 08:12 AM

Bang, bang! Stop or I'll shoot!
Damn dyslexia!

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 06:35 AM

Ed... hahahahahaheheheheee!

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: kendall
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 05:20 AM

Some novel ideas here. Many people would be unable to actually shoot someone, and if you are one of them, do not get a gun. More than likely it will be turned on you when you hesitate.

Those automatic motion sensor lights are a great idea, as no thief likes to be in the spotlight.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ebbie
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 03:17 AM

A lot of the wilderness cabins around Juneau have the wood panels with the nails pointing up, to guard against bears breaking in. I've been told that it is not effective but I don't know why not.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Gurney
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:35 AM

One of those fold-up garden saws is a pretty savage weapon, but it isn't actually a weapon, is it, officer? It just happened to be in the hall!
No-one can take it off you, either.

An aerosol and a cigarette lighter would repel most people. Make sure it is a flammable propellant.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: ranger1
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:16 AM

Personally, I'd go for the eyes and trachea before the groin. But then again, the dog would probably have them incapacitated before I had to do anything. Jason would be on his own, Bandit's a mumma's boy.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: meself
Date: 15 Sep 09 - 12:11 AM

"-- and you can remove it when you don't need it."

You CAN - and you probably should!

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Barry Finn
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 11:27 PM

We had a dog for 10 yrs. Never locked the door, never worried about the kids being alone. Never had so much as a peeping Shelia or Tom though the dog probably would've liked them. We didn't even have a key for yrs, never needed one.

Barry

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 11:02 PM

As I asked, how vicious do you want to get? A plank of nails, set points upright where an intruder must step on it, can really slow someone down -- and you can remove it when you don't need it.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Smokey.
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 10:34 PM

Aerosol type oven cleaner in the face, and then zealously boot the groin according to taste.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: heric
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 10:25 PM

You don't have one of these ?

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ed T
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 10:20 PM

A home that sends the message, don't mess with me.   A pick-up truck in the driveway with an empty gun rack visible inside (a confederate flag tied to the mirror). An overturned car in the back. A big dog chain, tied to a pole sunk into the ground. Bullet riddled Coke cans on posts.   Empty shot gun shells on the front porch.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Beer
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 10:10 PM

I like the e-mail I received recently suggesting that if you have a car with a set of those automatic push buttons that can make your car beep for awhile, you have a security system by just taking it to bed and placing it by your bed side table. If you think you hear an intruder just push the button.
Worth a try.
Beer (adrien)

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Don Firth
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 10:02 PM

Bullwhip

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: meself
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 09:31 PM

Loud dog. Or recording of.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 09:18 PM

Pet alligators, pet tarantulas, pet rattlesnakes....

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 09:15 PM

I was gonna suggest the wasp and hornet spray too. Just make sure the fellow you're shooting isn't The Green Hornet. He's one of the good guys.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 09:02 PM

Put a USMC (or equivalent) decal on your door.

Wasp and hornet killer spray.

Five D-cell flashlight in a metal case (Maglight, for instance).

How nasty/mean/violent do you want to be?

Put nails in your baseball bat (assuming it's wooden) and file them to points.

Set a row nails in a 1 x 2 x 24 (inches) very close together (you'll have to drill) so that about an inch sticks out the 1" side -- you're got a steel-toothed comb sword.

Or just buy a sword and learn to use it...having their hand cut off tends to discourage the most audacious gunmen.

Myself, I still prefer a nightstick (wooden truncheon) -- but I know how to use it.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: meself
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 08:50 PM

According to 'Dog the Bounty Hunter', and I quote, "If there's a flag on the outside, there's a gun on the inside" - so maybe just keep Old Glory waving on the outside ...

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Bill D
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 08:31 PM

well, one or two of those motion sensor floodlights makes 'em think twice. Then, if they ever shoot out the lights and GET in, the maze of 'stuff' & furniture may give me time to call 911.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 08:15 PM

If her pic doesn't talk....

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ed T
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 08:12 PM

Sorryabout that folks, that was Nancy Grace, with an extra letter....don't quite know where the t came from? She looks fine, until she talks....my opinion, of course.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:59 PM

Can I put the one on my bedroom window facing in?

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ed T
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:58 PM

A few of these:


http://home.flash.net/~funtraps/guinness.htm

You may have to experiment with the bait?

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: Ed T
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:56 PM

Nancy Grtace skarecrow at your door, + pictures of her on each window.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: longboat (inactive)
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:28 PM

Make them read the Mudcat threads, that'd be a deterrent, either that or reruns of Ugly Betty.

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:13 PM

Hahahahahahaaa!

Subject: RE: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: pdq
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:10 PM

Leave the Howard Stern Show playing 24 hours a day?

Subject: BS: Gun alternatives for home defense
From: gnu
Date: 14 Sep 09 - 07:00 PM

Since the Canuck gun laws have come into force there have been an alarming amount of "home invasions".

I touted these as evidence that the new gun laws were "incorrect" and "poorly written", which I still believe, because it is true. I don't want to argue any of it again... and again... and again...

THIS thread is not about that.

This thread is about this....

*********************************************************************
Subject: RE: BS: US Gun laws... yes... again... sigh
From: katlaughing - PM
Date: 12 Sep 09 - 10:18 PM

Gimmee a can of spray paint any day for repelling anyone stupid enough to break in. That and my dog.
*********************************************************************

I have a spray can of windshield deicer on the dresser next to my bed and a baseball bat beside it.

That windshield deicer goes further than spray paint... at least ten feet. And a SuperSoaker squirt gun goes over 20 feet... bleach is cheap.

Any other ideas?