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Banana Republicans...
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: kendall Date: 15 Dec 00 - 11:15 PM I think he did |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Bill D Date: 15 Dec 00 - 09:23 PM and if Breaux is smart ,he will say.."no, thank you-choose a non-Senator" |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: catspaw49 Date: 15 Dec 00 - 09:22 PM Hey Burke.......... CLUE: Louisiana----Think..."Oil" Happy to help. Spaw (also waiting for Granny Yokum) |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: GUEST,Burke Date: 15 Dec 00 - 07:54 PM God, that's funny. The vice-president (Cheney) casts the deciding vote in any tie in the Senate. With the Senate tied 50-50 in terms of party affiliations we can expect many more votes by this vice president than any before him. He might not be the US equivalent of a Prime Minister, but it's a role unprecedented in US history. Am I the only one suspicious of talk of bi-paritsan Dubya looking at putting a moderate Democrat Senator from Louisiana in his cabinet? And can we expect his replacement to be Dem or Rep? |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Bill D Date: 15 Dec 00 - 06:58 PM *waiting for Buddha, Shiva, Kali, Allah, M'pungo, Thor, Zeus, Zarathustra and various other dieties to rule on God's pronouncement*.....then we can appeal it to the Tri-Lateral commission...or maybe the ultimate authority..Mammy Yokum! |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 15 Dec 00 - 04:10 PM I stand humbly corrected, with appologies to the pork. Bacon then. - Larry |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: GUEST,God Date: 15 Dec 00 - 02:54 PM 1. Just in off the AP wire... BUSH SUES SANTA AUSTIN, TX - Dec.15 - Attorneys for Texas Governor George W. Bush filed suit in federal court today, seeking to prevent Santa Claus from making his list and then checking it twice. The complaint seeks an immediate injunction against the beloved Christmas icon, asking the court to effectively ban his traditional practice of checking the list of good boys and girls one additional time before packing his sleigh. The suit, filed in the Federal District Court of Austin, Texas, asks a federal judge to "hereby order Mr. Claus to cease and desist all repetitive and duplicative list-checking activity, and certify the original list as submitted, without amendment, alteration, deletion, or other unnecessary modification." "There are no standards for deciding who is naughty, and who is nice. It's totally arbitrary and capricious. How many more times does he need to check? This checking, checking, and re-checking over and over again must stop now," said former Secretary James Baker. Baker further claimed that unnamed GOP observers witnessed an elf remove all boys named Brad from the "nice" list, filing them under "naughty" instead because "everyone knows all boys named Brad are brats." Gov. Bush cited the potential for unauthorized list tampering, and blasted what he called the "fuzzy math up there at the North Pole." "Their security is really awful, really bad," said Bush. "My mother just walked right in, told 'em she was Mrs. Claus. They didn't check her ID or nothing." Meanwhile, Dick Cheney, Gov. Bush's running mate, issued a direct plea to St. Nick himself. "Mr. Claus, I call on you to do the honorable thing, and quit checking your list. The children of the world have had enough. They demand closure now," Cheney said, adding that his granddaughter has already selected a name for the pony that she's asked for. Santa Claus could not be reached for comment, but a spokes-elf said he was "deeply distressed" by news of the pending legal action against him. "He's losing weight, and he hasn't said 'Ho Ho Ho' for days," said the spokes-elf. "He's just not feeling jolly." 2. BREAKING NEWS: GOD OVERRULES SUPREME COURT VERDICT Bush to be smitten later today In a stunning development this morning, God invoked the "one nation, under God" clause of the Pledge of Allegiance to overrule last night's Supreme Court decision that handed the White House to George Bush. "I'm not sure where the Supreme Court gets off," God said this morning on a rare Today Show appearance, "but I'm sure as hell not going to lie back and let Bush get away with this bullshit." "I've watched analysts argue for weeks now that the exact vote count in Florida 'will never be known.' Well, I'm God and I DO know exactly who voted for whom. Let's cut to the chase: Gore won Florida by exactly 20,219 votes." Shocking political analysts and pundits, God's unexpected verdict overrules the official Electoral College tally and awards Florida to Al Gore, giving him a 289-246 victory. The Bush campaign is analyzing God's Word for possible grounds for appeal. "God's ruling is a classic over-reach," argued Bush campaign strategist Jim Baker. "Clearly, a divine intervention in a U.S. Presidential Election is unprecedented, unjust, and goes against the constitution of the state of Florida." "Jim Baker's a jackass," God responded. "He's got some surprises ahead of him, let me tell you. HOT ones, if you know what I mean." God, who provided the exact vote counts for every Florida precinct, explained that bad balloting machinery and voter confusion were no grounds to give the White House to "a friggin' idiot." "Look, only 612 people in Palm Beach County voted for Buchanan. Get real! The rest meant to vote for Gore. Don't believe me? I'll name them: Anderson, Pete; Anderson, Sam, Jr.; Arthur, James; Barnhardt, Ron..." Our Lord then went on to note that he was displeased with George W. Bush's prideful ways and announced that he would officially smite him today. In an act of wrath unlike any reported since the Book of Job, God has taken all of Bush's goats and livestock, stripped him of his wealth and possessions, sold his family into slavery, forced the former presidential candidate into hard labor in a salt mine, and afflicted him with deep boils.
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: GUEST,Giac, not at home Date: 15 Dec 00 - 02:49 PM There was supposed to be a march on the White House today, by FBI agents, protesting the proposed pardoning of Peltier. A group of "them" were on Good Morning America today, with pursed lips and dour expressions, looking very much like they had sticks up their behinds. GMA also reported these tidbits: Dubya's favorite book is Lonesome Dove, his favorite drama is Lonesome Dove, one of his favorite sports is killing doves. They added that once when he was hunting doves, he killed a protected song bird, but he was a "good ole boy," turned himself in and paid the fine.
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Mrrzy Date: 15 Dec 00 - 12:18 PM Spaw! ROTFL! What a hoot! |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: mousethief Date: 15 Dec 00 - 12:05 PM Actually pork chops these days are very low in fat, especially if trimmed before cooking. Bacon would have made a better joke, perhaps. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 15 Dec 00 - 11:13 AM That was reported on the news, and at a big rally in NYC last Sunday... hope so. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 15 Dec 00 - 09:42 AM Is he going to pardon him? I hadn't heard. troll |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 15 Dec 00 - 08:44 AM Actually, serriously, I think that Clinton's first impulse was to pardon Millican, and that's it, then when all this happened, he said, I'll shove it to those guys, let the Indian go also! However, it will be nice to get Leonard Pelitier back. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 15 Dec 00 - 08:22 AM Ah! Comes the dawn. I'd forgotten about Cheney's heart attack. *BG* troll |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 15 Dec 00 - 07:57 AM Hi troll: , the reference to pork chops is they are high fat and not good for the heart.... just as it is not good to wave champain under the nose of a someone who fights daily against his compulsion to get drunk or stoned... |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 15 Dec 00 - 03:39 AM I'd swear there's an echo in this place. troll |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: paddymac Date: 15 Dec 00 - 01:46 AM 'S alright 'Spaw. It's prob'ly the Vegemite |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: paddymac Date: 15 Dec 00 - 01:45 AM 'S alright 'Spaw. It's prob'ly the Vegemite |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 14 Dec 00 - 10:23 PM 'S alright 'Spaw. It's prob'ly the Vegemite. troll **BG** |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 14 Dec 00 - 10:23 PM 'S alright 'Spaw. It's prob'ly the Vegemite. troll **BG** |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: catspaw49 Date: 14 Dec 00 - 10:01 PM Well, I didn't mean a "couple of places" HERE!!! Sorry.... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: catspaw49 Date: 14 Dec 00 - 10:00 PM If you all missed this one on the other thread, it deserves to be seen a couple of places........ PUNCH IT TWICE, ITS ALRIGHT ........By Ross Altman, 2000
It ain't no use to vote in Palm Beach County
It ain't no use in turnin' on your light babe
It ain't no use to ask for another ballot babe
So you might as well vote for Buchanan babe Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: katlaughing Date: 14 Dec 00 - 09:01 PM I just wish to hell Clinton had stuck by his guns and really pardoned Leonard Peltier before he leaves office. Yeha, Greg F., ya got that right:-) Good ones, Ebbie! kat |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Troll Date: 14 Dec 00 - 08:52 PM Larry...The pork chop bit makes no sense. It was GORES running mate that is Jewish. troll |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Ebbie Date: 14 Dec 00 - 07:24 PM I can see it now: Cheney as Prime Minister, Rice as Secretary of State, Baker as Press Secretary, Powell as Minister of War, Haig as Secretary of Human Services, North as Attorney General (They will brief each other)... and Dubya as Representative of State who attends funerals and ribbon cuttings. He will never get away from teleprompters. Well, maybe after this administration a shared presidency will become a viable alternative.
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 14 Dec 00 - 07:22 PM Well, it is good to see that Clinton is joining the spirit of forgiveness and coming together, and is going to pardon Sarah Jane Moore and Squeeky Frome, is inviting Ben Laudin to tour Washington in Feb., is pardoning McVey, and has taken to smoking in bed... and is leaving a bottle of Champain in the icebox for the next alcoholic inhabitant of Pen. Ave., and leaving a whole freezerfull of pork chops in the vice president's residence, or am I missinformed? ;-\ ... Larry |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Greg F. Date: 14 Dec 00 - 06:31 PM What was it, Kat, someone mentioned in another thread about Cheney being Dubya's ventriloquist, I think? Prime Minister/Ventriloquist, whatever. :-) Best, Greg |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: Stewart Date: 14 Dec 00 - 06:14 PM I just came across a song that seem appropriate for the season (election, that is) The Prickle-Holly Bush -- Hampshire Folk Song
Hold up your hand dear judge, Cheers, S. in Seattle |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: mousethief Date: 14 Dec 00 - 05:33 PM As C.S. Lewis said (from memory here so don't quote me), most political sermons tell you little more than which papers are taken at the rectory. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: katlaughing Date: 14 Dec 00 - 05:15 PM Wyoming's U.S. Senator Mike Enzi, an arse if there ever was one, is quoted as saying Dick Cheney will serve in a role as "almost a prime minister for the country" - an executive branch officer with a Congressional leadership role. He went on to opine that it was a new role with a lot of potential! Anybody remember voting for Prime Minister Cheney?! |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: GUEST Date: 14 Dec 00 - 05:14 PM I insist on the right of persons of all religious convictions to apply same to politics. I merely deplore the fact that the ones in pulpits are usually wrong. and the ones in Christian pulpits so often at variance with what their Master is recorded as teaching. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: mousethief Date: 14 Dec 00 - 05:09 PM I'll drink to that, Paddymac! |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: paddymac Date: 14 Dec 00 - 04:54 PM IMHO, preachers of all sorts ought to cease and desist preaching politics from the pulpit. |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 14 Dec 00 - 04:47 PM I agree, as the bumpersticker mentioned in the post about winner, "the last time we listened to a bush, we wandered in the desert for 40 years!" |
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Subject: RE: Banana Republicans... From: mousethief Date: 14 Dec 00 - 04:35 PM I think they are more comparable on the basis of being lost in the wilderness. |
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Subject: Banana Republicans... From: InOBU Date: 14 Dec 00 - 04:32 PM A news report just stated that a minister compared Bush to Moses, saying that he was chosen to lead by God! I guess Scalia is being promoted higher than he thought! Cheers, I think, Larry |
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