Tech: Cleaning The Internet

Subject: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 28 Mar 07 - 07:24 PM

PLEASE PASS THIS NOTICE TO OTHER USERS WHO MAY NOT SEE IT!

As many of you know, each year the Internet must be shut down for 24 hours in order to allow us to clean it. The cleaning process, which eliminates dead e-mail and inactive ftp, www and gopher sites, allows for a better-working and faster Internet.

This year, the cleaning process will take place from 12:01 a.m. GMT on April 1 until 12:01 a.m. GMT on April 2. During that 24-hour period, five very powerful Japanese built multi-lingual Internet-crawling robots (Toshiba ML-2274) situated around the world will search the Internet and delete any data that they find.

In order to protect your valuable data from deletion we ask that you do the following:

1. Disconnect all terminals and local area networks from their Internet connections.

2. Shut down all Internet servers, or disconnect them from the Internet

3. Disconnect all disks and hard drives from any connections to the Internet

4. Refrain from connecting any computer to the Internet in any way

5. Avoid placing operating microwave ovens or toaster/toaster ovens near your computer modem

6. Avoid wearing nylon (or other dielectric fiber) undergarments because of the possibility of electrical discharge.

We understand the inconvenience that this may cause some Internet users, and we apologize. However, we are certain that any inconvenience will be more than made up for by the increased speed and efficiency of the Internet, once it has been cleared of electronic flotsam and jetsam.

Sysops and others: Since the last Internet cleaning, the number of Internet users has grown dramatically. Please assist us in alerting the public of the upcoming Internet cleaning by posting this message where your users will be able to read it. Please pass this message on to other sysops and Internet users as well.

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: Joybell
Date: 28 Mar 07 - 07:34 PM

Sooooo April the 1st? Yeah right!

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 28 Mar 07 - 07:38 PM

We thank you for your cooperation.

*****

NOTE: Anybody who takes this seriously deserves to.

For more on Internet hoaxes, visit the US Department of Energy's Hoaxbusters site:

http://hoaxbusters.ciac.org/

Happy April Fool's Day! :)
~~~~~~~~~

Gee - didn't take this long to get confined to BS....

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: mack/misophist
Date: 28 Mar 07 - 09:23 PM

Gopher sites? Time to update your hoaxes!

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 28 Mar 07 - 09:33 PM

Only the technically knowledgeable know that mack/misophist :-)

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 03:33 AM

If you really want to keep up to date and remain technically knowledgeable, you MUST consult:

Disturbing Tech: 10 Products That Make You Look Away


These are REAL (I think) things you can buy now to enhance your computing pleasure.

Click for the "slide show."

(Several devices require a USB port.)

John

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 03:42 PM

"Tech: Cleaning The Internet"

Wash it by hand.

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: mrdux
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 04:15 PM

re: Disturbing Tech: 10 Products That Make You Look Away

actually, the Digestive Table
is sort of cool, in a science-fair-project-as-conceptual-art kind of way. although i don't really want one in the dining room.

michael

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: jacqui.c
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 04:25 PM

I liked the humping dogs - I've got to send that site to my son!

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: Amergin
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 04:47 PM

I want a humping dog to give to my gramma for mother's day....

Subject: RE: Tech: Cleaning The Internet
From: skipy
Date: 29 Mar 07 - 05:51 PM

Stop knocking April !,it's our wedding anni!
Skipy & Mrs Skipy, soon to be 18 years! + 5 living in sin!