BS: telling the truth

Subject: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST,long time member
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 02:57 PM

I've just told a friend that i had a very short ( one day)relationship with her husband.
OK - he told me the as you would expect crap of the wife not understanding me = idiot I believed it - perhaps I wanted to..........but I had to tell the truth. She didn't go crazy but he might- I'm scared.

Yes you might say ha ha you deserve this but I'm very scared - any ideas - what to do next?

Why did I say anything.................I had too

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Bobert
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 03:22 PM

If you ain't willin' to do the time, don't do the crime...

1st crime: the fling

2md crime: tellin' his wife

But, don't be scared... The guy ain't gonna hunt you down 'er nuthin' and even if he does he probably just wants to vent his anger on you... He'll blow it off and all will be, ahhhhh, not so well between you and these folks...

Hang in there and jus' ride it out...

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 03:30 PM

thanks for not being one sided - I feel so bad

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 03:31 PM

Personally I'd have said nothing, unless it was an ongoing relationship, that I wanted out in the open. Sounds like yours was a 'fling' and as such would have been better used as an object lesson, and not as it now might become, a lever!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Mrrzy
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 03:58 PM

Some truths don't need to be told... good luck with the fallout, flings happen but memories last...

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 04:07 PM

made the mistake.............no point in beating myself again..........help!

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST,stupid guest
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 04:16 PM

The line should read very very stupid guest.

We all make mistakes, there is a part of me that wants to make everything OK and I know its not goimg to happen. I'm trying my best

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Bert
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 04:17 PM

What to do next? NOTHING.

As my Grandma used to say "Least said, soonest mended"

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Megan L
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 04:52 PM

self indulgent pap

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: kendall
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 05:10 PM

The past is by definition past. But, why did you feel compelled to tell? Did you think it would make you feel better by making him a target of his wife's anger? Explain reason.

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Kaleea
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 05:38 PM

"had to" ??
   . . . gun pointed at your head? caught on video? lie detector? in the middle of a circle of psychics? wanted to get back at the husband because he "lied" to you? wanted to see the wife squirm? wanted to alleviate your "guilt?" feeling better now?

Ditto what Bobert said!!

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 05:55 PM

If he hadn't been full of the 'wife doesn't understand me' crap, meaning if he had treated you better, you would have had more than a one day relationship with your friend's husband.

I guess you got hurt when you bumped into them in the frozen food aisle pretty soon after your one dayer, or maybe saw them looking very happy at a party, and you realised you had been stung.

Well you've had your revenge now and personally you deserve all you get, whereas your 'friend' didn't deserve you.

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Zany Mouse
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 06:15 PM

I don't think I would want a friend like you. What good did you do? I suspect the telling was revenge related.

Time to grow up!

Rhiannon

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST,Bee
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 06:56 PM

I'm hoping you're very young and thus entitled to make idiotic decisions which you may regret and learn from at leisure.

If you're over thirty, then IMO, you'd no excuse for your behaviour and compounded it by stirring the pot. If you live in a small town, consider moving.

You asked.

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Sep 06 - 07:02 PM

Trolling, trolling, trolling
Trolling, trolling, trolling,
Keep this bullshit trolling,
RAWHIDE

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST,long time member
Date: 10 Sep 06 - 01:19 AM

my motive was selfish - trying to sort out the guilt I felt. I thought I was doing "the right thing"

I may have kick started my friend into moving on, I hope so because she deserves so much better.

Call me troll call me whatever, I'm not a bad person.

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 10 Sep 06 - 01:41 AM

When you engage in that kind of relationship, you rationalize for yourself why it might be okay. When it isn't, and you feel guilty, the guilt is all yours (and his). The telling doesn't fix anything, it just spreads more pain (exponentially) so it wasn't a good idea. If you felt that someone else was going to spill the beans and you wanted to get your version out there first--well, I still think it's a bad idea.

I suspect that many of us have someone in our past who wasn't very good for us but who we felt we loved. Sometimes that love lasts for a long long time because of the obstacles that never let the relationship run its course--it stays pent up, it doesn't peter out (no pun intended). Finding out that someone is a rat is an all-too-common discovery, but it's part of growing up to be discreet about the relationship and try to avoid causing pain when possible.

I made a mistake similar to yours, many years ago. I learned a lot from it, and won't make that mistake again. I'm sure I'll make others, but not that one. "Full disclosure" may be ethical in journalism; it's a luxury few can afford in clandestine relationships.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: telling the truth
From: GUEST,long time member
Date: 10 Sep 06 - 01:59 AM

STS - I think you are right