BS: Riding the High Horse

Subject: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:01 PM

The subject of "riding the High Horse" came up on another thread, and people were arguing about who does that and who doesn't. Well, I think it deserves a thread of its own. I have plenty of experience when it comes to this and here's my story:

*****

Listen, guys, when it comes to riding the high horse you ain't seen nothin' yet. No siree. I used to ride a horse so dang high that when I was in the saddle I couldn't even see the ground! I had to pack a parachute just in case of a quick dismount being required, but that horse was good as gold, so I never needed to use the chute. My loyal gal Tuesday (that was her name) would be waitin' for me back at the ranch where we had one of them great big long ladders that are normally used by the fire department and she would prop that ladder up alongside old "Fireball" so I could dismount in relative safety.

Well, the view you would get from atop old Fireball when riding the range was something that would have brought tears to Tom Russell's eyes, lemme tell ya, although the air did get a mite thin up there...so I hadda remember to breathe deep so as not to get lightheaded. Did my lungs a world of good.

I rode old Fireball for many a year until he finally died tragically. Got hit by a low flying fighter jet with some damn fool USAF pilot who was joyriding around at below 2,000 feet. They should have taken that fool's wings away. He ejected and survived, but the horse and the plane both suffered fatal damage, I'm sorry to say.

So I ain't ridin' the high horse no longer. But by God, I have fond memories...

****

So, that's my story. How about yours?

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:22 PM

Reading that post, I am very doubtful that the horse was that one that was high.

Were you talking the horse's medicine?

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: pdq
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:25 PM

"Were you talking the horse's medicine?"

Wrong end of the horse.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:28 PM

How he took it was a private matter, between him and the horse.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:36 PM

If you fully understood the joys and rewards of riding the high horse, Jack, you would not doubt my story one bit. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: pdq
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:39 PM

The trouble with this high horse is that it often goes poop on people who deserve better.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:40 PM

Well, yes, but you have to remember not to stand so close to the horse's hind end...

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:43 PM

We were dirt poor Irish up Kent County, and, when I was a lad, the dirt was so poor, all we could grow was potaoes and pulp. Couldn't afford a horse, so we used moose fer plowin the potatoe fields in the summer and fer twitchin pulp in the winter.

In the spring, in the bog country, she's too wet fer ta do anything. In the fall, no way you could twitch a log on accounta the logs was so big, a cow moose couldn't twitch and the bulls had horns so big they couldn't get through the bush to twitch... them bulls had horns so big, they had ta come outta the woods in late summer just ta turn around... and couldn't go back in until winter after the shed.

But, when they was working the field, it was a sight... the whole family perched up on them antlers, Gramma's side on the left and Gramp's side on the right, orange and green eh, and the city kin up fer the summer got ta ride on the hump. Wished we'da been able to afford pictures.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:43 PM

If the horse is so high then the danger is being below. On the other hand if the rider is high then the danger of being below and behind the behind of the horse is higher.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:45 PM

Dat's a lotta bull














moose wit hantlers dat big!

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: PoppaGator
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:51 PM

Rather horses that are constantly high, I prefer to ride the up-and-down horses (on carousels).

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:59 PM

Buddy! You knows we gottem! Dem mooze whot ye fellers got n t'island is whot come from New Brunswick hway back when. I seen yer mooze and dere fookin uge! I've not seem em dat big 'ereaboutst. Well, I 'ave, but not so many as all dat!

But... as fer da hantlers, I nare shit ye. An, ye be warned, if you tink dem hantlers be a sight, ye wanna see the porkies whot eats em after da shed roun 'ere. Me zon, me zon, ye don't want any a dem "introduced" ta da Granite Planet. Mooze, y, les porcupique, non, non, non, bahgoddamn la.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:03 PM

Aside... one moose season when my old man got drawn, there was sign at the main entrance to the Salmon River Limits lumber roads that read, "moose halled by whores" with a telephone number... wish I'd had a camera.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:08 PM

>>wish I'd had a camera.

Camera! I wish I ad dat number!!












I'd call em up and ask em to call me the next time they 'alled a moose, So as I could take a snap of dat!

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:11 PM

Snatch a moment?

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: GUEST,Jack the Sailor
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:13 PM

You push the button, we do the rest.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:23 PM

So, LH, what did you and Tuesday git fer a horse after, rest his soul, Fireball?

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:32 PM

Wal, we had a whole buncha good hosses of more regular size too, and there're some stories I could tell. For instance, we had a green hoss. His hair was Granny Apple green and his skin was sorta yellowish-bronze. He was way ahead of his time, green bein' so popular a color now, and he was good fer camouflage when I was ridin' amongst the cottonwoods and long grass, so I used to use him fer huntin' deer and stuff like that. His name was Green Arrow, no connection with the comic book feller, though. He warn't all that tall, as horses go, but he was sure fast!

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:39 PM

Did he haw a lot?

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 02:01 PM

He neether hemmed nor hawed. Thet horse was always decisive.

Subject: RE: BS: Riding the High Horse
From: gnu
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 02:02 PM

Gee!