BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?

Subject: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Davetnova
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 06:13 AM

You know. Like an Elephant's Graveyard. Where monkeys can go to die or to kiss their lover's cold clay whatever it is that monkeys have round their mouths.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 06:39 AM

Yes in Hartlepool.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 07:21 AM

I would'nt think so,by the time they drop from trees dead the large cats would have them for their tea.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: freda underhill
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 08:11 AM

I met a traveler from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered tail lies, whose hair,
And wrinkled tip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read,
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed,
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Chongomandias, King of Kings:
Look upon my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away..

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 08:23 AM

That is a lovely poem Freda

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: freda underhill
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 08:25 AM

thank you guest. the original is by Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792-1822), this version is by Percy Rhesus Shelley!

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST,Cheetah, the cheetah
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 08:34 AM

Monkeys GOOD! Taste GOOD! Run slow on ground! Like human!

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 09:11 AM

Yes, there is. It is the southern reaches of the Kalahari, far beyond the normally traveled ways of men, beyond the burning sands and the black conical hills, in a region guarded by a ring of fire mountains.

It takes weeks for the monkeys to deliver their dead; they travel by night, avoiding predators, in herds for strength.

It is a sight few humans have ever seen, but none who have can ever forget the Death Ritual of the Monkey Tribes.

Here is how it goes....

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 10:51 AM

...we oughta start one in Southern Idaho, and give one confused game warden something to ponder.











(you have to read that OTHER thread)

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 11:16 AM

Save Chongo's relatives a trip post mortem:~)
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:07 PM

And build a mausoleum there in which to one day inter the earthly remains of G.W. Bush, Lord High Chimp of the Realm, when he someday departs this vale of tears...

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: MMario
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:11 PM

Would that be a New World Monkey's Graveyard? or an Old World Monkey's Graveyard? Unlike Elephants, monkeys had a distinct split between the two hemispheres - (BTW - there are no New World Apes - only monkeys.)

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:15 PM

SRS, you come up with the most Inneresting Tidbits!!!


A

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: MMario
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:21 PM

Amos - you been taking your dried frog pills on time?

BTW - have you heard they now think that about half the bat species actually belong to the primate line of evolution?

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:31 PM

Yeah...the NEw York Yankees are looking into it -- they want to hire a whole new line of bat boys...


A

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST,Boris the Bat
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:36 PM

...burp..!

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 12:39 PM

Time to go to the batroom I think.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST,the Monkey Goddess
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 01:02 PM

Monkeys can teach us wise lessons...

the Goddess Tara and the 100th monkey

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 01:06 PM

As I have mentioned elsewhere, I used to set tombstones for a living. Well, the tombstones were for dead folks, but I was living and I got paid for it and, oh, hell, you know what I mean. Anyway, we would sometimes get an order for one for "Cheechee, my beloved Rheseus" or "Flower Howler, husband of Bowerbush" (these are the only two I remember). The boss took care of these himself, even taking the truck out alone to set them. He never talked about them, but a sizable check came in after each order, along with a stalk of bananas. I checked the truck's odometer before and after one such trip, and found that he'd driven 187.3 miles. Of course, the cemetery could have been a lot closer and he'd driven around a bit to throw me off.

Anyway, somewhere around the bulging bellybutton of Illinois there is a mysterious graveyard. I'd ask the boss about it, but he died in 1969.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 01:16 PM

Ha! Ha!

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: GUEST,Richard H
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 01:36 PM

The green monkey was brought here (Barbados) from Africa some 350 years ago. The species now differs from its African ancestors.

There are lots of monkeys in Barbados, living in troops with watchmen and a hierarchy system. One troop lives in the trees about 50 yards from my house and at night you can hear the females complaining when the males come home drunk or whatever.

Barbadian folklore tells of funeral rituals where they all march with a leaf in their mouths. According to the "A-Z of Barbados Heritage", "Monkeys are also alleged to hold funerals for their dead and bury them. While there is no evidence of this, it is certainly odd that with such a sizeable population skeletons are so rarely found."

I have only ever seen one semi-buried skull in the woods around here.

Monkeys are regarded as a pest and there is a Bds$15 per tail bounty. A French-Canadian has set up a medical research facility here and makes a lot of money shipping them to England (about 1000 per year) where they are killed and cut up to make smallpox vaccine (I think) for humans like George Bush and Tony Blair.

There's something ironic in that but I can't put my finger on it.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 02:30 PM

Could it be that GW and Tony Bleurgh are the least likely to ever catch smallpox, much to an intelligent worlds' disgust?

What am I saying, intelligent world.... we voted them in!

Bring on the monkeys!!!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 03:31 PM

"A million monkeys, pounding away at typewriters, would eventually write the works of Shakespeare"...

I suppose that's true, as they've already turned out a few speeches for Dubya...

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 03:35 PM

No one could ever accuse G W Gump of being Shakespearian.
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 03:59 PM

They tried that once, you know. They built a hige specially designed hall, and lined up 1,000,000 monkeys pf various brands at computer keyboards, running a program designed to detect Shakespearean word combinations using a specially design algorithm.

For six years the research team patrolled the desks looking for a signal with no joy.

Suddenly one bleary afternoon one of them grabbed a printout from the nearest dot-matrix printer and yelled excitedly..."Hey, fellas!! I think we've got something here. "To be or not to be, that is the kwaz98hernaguiqyqtjk]!!!" "


A

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Peace
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:02 PM

Wahts a monkey's gravey ard aynway! This is a musec site--not a food site.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:15 PM

they have supercomputers now that can simulate random monkey typing-(saves a fortune on cleaning warehouses)- and they have been running a program especially written by Chongo Chimp for the Cray 404......I hear that just the other day they got "Alas, poor Shatner, I knew him, Horatio" ...the the sound card giggled.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:18 PM

Monkeys are shite, anyway, is wot...wot use are they? Not a job, dont do nothing, dont pay for nofthingg, they are crap. if I see one I will give it a slap for being a crap lifeform.

JfH.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Peace
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:27 PM

William Shatner met Uri Geller. Now, Shatner's all bent outta shape. (Hold the applause; really, hold the applause, it's OK. NO APPLAUSE NECESSARY.)

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:27 PM

Bet you can't walk down the street for people slappin ya eh? : )

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Peace
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:37 PM

Too true, Liz, too true.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Cluin
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:39 PM

Yes, there's a monkey's graveyard. But it's nowhere near as memrable as the Monkey's Funeral Parlour. The eulogies are almost always cut short by a session of feces-throwing.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Cluin
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:41 PM

Kinda like a lot of discussions around here...

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 04:47 PM

ROTFLMAO, guys. Too rich for me (ducks for cover).


A

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Peace
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 05:22 PM

"Bet you can't walk down the street for people slappin ya eh? : )"

Usually I have to pay for that!

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 05:56 PM

Amos, it looks like jOhn from Hull has somehow got hold of your cookie.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Peace
Date: 11 Jan 05 - 05:57 PM

LH, that's MORE info than anyone needs to have.

Subject: RE: BS: Is there a Monkey's Graveyard?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jan 05 - 03:21 PM

Heh!