Lyr Req: Five Pounds of Possum

Subject: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Hiroshi Ogura
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 09:01 PM

Does anybody know the lyrics to "Five Pounds of Possum (in my Headlights Tonight)"?

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 09:06 PM

Either a huge piece of irony or a great joke...right?

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 10:47 PM

If I run one down, I'll save the ass for you, Paw. --seed

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Barbara
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 10:51 PM

Seed, I think it's like the guitar goods Sandy keeps trying to sell -- just save him the hole.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 11:05 PM

Hey, now "Cats", I'm willin' to bet this is a legit song, and that someone will prove me right. I'll put up my 0-18...no I won't.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 09 Apr 99 - 11:16 PM

One night last summer my dogs were raising a ruckus in the back yard and I came out with a flashlight and saw gray fur and naked tail and thought they had killed a rat. I put on a leather work glove, picked it up, and tossed it into an empty plastic garbage can in my patio. The next afternoon I was going to dump the rat in the regular garbage can but when I lifted the lid, I saw that not only was it a possum, not a rat, but still very much alive, if suffering from heat exhaustion from the sun shining on the can. I put the glove on again, lifted him/her out and put whichever into a box with water and a little dog food. I don't know if it ate or drank anything but when I came back after a while, it was very much revived so I put the glove back on again and picked it up and released it next to the side fence, under which it quickly disappeared. It was just about ocarina size--and if it ever happens again, I promise to hollow it out, dry it, and turn it into an ocarina for you, Paw.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: LEJ
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 01:56 AM

" Five pounds of Possum in my Headlights Tonight

Five pounds of possum, Eyes lit up with Fright

Although I'm just a sinner

I'll thank the Lord for sendin dinner

there'll be 5 pounds of possum in the Fryin Pan tonight"

Is that the one?...LEJ

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 02:06 AM

You are, of course, the one who'd know. Simply amazing.

BTW...try Luhol-vul, that's as close as I can get it...it's almost Lall, but with more u sound.

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From:
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 02:34 AM

Lej. that's terrific. I committed that to file. How do you sing it? Tune of "Plastic Jesus"? [e-mail]

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: LEJ
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 02:43 AM

Cats...believe it or not, I AM NOT Hiroshi Ogura, and this was not a setup. OK, so I did make up the lyric. Cause if their ain't a song like that there oughta be. I was gonna work "Berea" into it but couldn't think of an appropriate rhyme.

tucker...sorry, I'm a lyricist only. If you wanna work up a tune, I'll share songwriting credits with you. Of course, this really MAY be a song, in which case the full force of ASCAP may be marshalled against us both...LEJ

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: AlistairUK
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 09:45 AM

Oh Joy Oh Joy a possum thread. I am flipping cartwheels evena s I speak, which makes typing a little tricky, but I'm nothing if not resourceful. Oh let my little grey cells get on this one.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Barbara
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 11:24 AM

Seems like there was a mention of this on one of the earlier roadkill threads. Check 'em out.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: MMario
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 11:35 AM

I seem to remember having heard a song about this....at some point when the kids were having contests to see who could spot the most "road pizza". That would have been ABOUT 10 years ago

MMario

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: MMario
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 11:40 AM

Okay, yup, it's a real song. Haven't found the words, but it's for sale out on the web.

MMario

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 12:59 PM

There was a thread on this awhile back. I know some of the words, But my tape is poorpoor. If nobody else come through I'll try a decifer again.

Anyhow the chorus is:

There's 5 pounds of possum in my headlights tonight
If I can run him over, everything's goin' to be allright
We'll have some possum gravey
Oh what a wonderful sight
There's 5 pounds of possum in my headlights tonight.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: tmtucker
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 11:36 PM

I am committed ( or should be ) to this song now! It screams to be heard (sic). How do I play it for anyone on the net? Tucker

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Susan A-R
Date: 10 Apr 99 - 11:55 PM

Hmmm, belongs in that Food songs link doesn't it? I once wrote one entitled four miles of frost heaves (we grow them like that here in Vermont. Perhaps we could meld the choruses of those country/western/number songs together and come up with sonmething REALLY um interesting Oh, and how many buffalo was it? 64 verses puts us in the same league with 99 bottles of oh well . . .

Susan

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: tmtucker/ ala impromtu 2nd verse
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 12:38 AM

that scraggly face it haunted me,I swear it did all night. tums and Rolaids tried their best but they couldn't pull the fight That possum grease and floured roll it was such delight but now my inards scream out loud and my bowels are in a flight

want more of this punishment?

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 03:42 AM

Of course!!!!!

Ah Possum, the other yellow meat.

catspaw, soon to be owner of the worlds first Possum ass whistle pig.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Joe Offer
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 03:57 AM

I did a search for Possum threads, and found this and this.
"Road Kill" brought up just one thread. We must be slipping.
Oh, but I forgot to look for roadkill and dead skunk and more dead skunk.
I can't believe we haven't had an armadillo thread, and the database doesn't have a single song about armadillos.
-Presented in the Public Interest by Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 04:18 AM

MMMMM......MMMMM.....MMMMMM

Possum on the half shell!!!

MM..MMM...GOOD

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Barbara
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 04:26 AM

Say, crew, here's an exercise for you. Pretend you are Hiroshi Ogura, and the first time you have visited the Mudcat is to ask for this song. Got it?
Now read through this thread and see how much of it makes sense to you.
Maybe we should make it a point to answer people's queries straightforwardly before we take the idea and run with it. I'm guilty, too.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Joe Offer
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 04:44 AM

You've got a point, Barbara.

Click here

for the "Five Pounds of Possum" song.
Yum.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 09:08 AM

You are of course right Barbara, and I do apologize, as I immediately went the wrong way. But I gotta' say that in this case, there was and still is something fishy. I think we're being had ... uh, maybe. I dunno'......As I look back, I think I'll stay with my first post:

"Either a huge piece of irony or a great joke.....right?"

Actually, I shouldn't have touched it with a 10 foot possum tail! Sorry.

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Susan A-R
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 10:13 AM

I gues I just assumed that anyone who was looking for that song had a mudcat sense of humor, you know, kinda out there. As for me, I prefer squirrel(sp). Susan

Subject: Lyr Add: THE ARMADILLO JACKAL (Robert Earl Keen)
From: katlaughing
Date: 11 Apr 99 - 10:47 AM

Joe: in the thread about ronrocos and tipples, I mentioned a song about armadillos by Robert Earl Keen, on his "No Kinda Dancer" CD. Found these on the net:


THE ARMADILLO JACKAL
by Robert Earl Keen

This song uses a capo on the 3rd fret and all the chords are listed as the 3rd fret being open.

 Am                                  G
  The evening sun was sinkin' down, a chill north wind a-blows
  F                                           E
  The new-plowed ground was coolin' fast, the river rolls and flows
              Am                               G
  Beneath the two-lane concrete river bridge between my place and town
          F                                E
  On that hot-bed Farm to Market road they call 1291
             Am                                    G
  I'm sayin' son you'll see me searchin'; sizzlin' down that broad hi-way
  F                                 E
  Dollar signs in both my eyes, I'm seekin' out my prey.
               Am                           G
  I'm prayin' "Jesus, will you send me just another three or four?"
               F                             E
  They pay two-fifty down in Halletsville, 3 dollars, maybe more.
                Am                              G
  And more than likely they'll be out tonight a-wanderin' from the farms;
  F                     E
  Waddlin' down 1291 to keep their bodies warm
              Am                              G
  I'm talking walkin' belts and neckties, and boots for rodeo;
             F                                        E
  They don't run too fast, don't waste much gas.  I'm makin' lots o' dough.
            Am     C    G   Am         Am       C    G   Am
  The armadillo....o....o...o  The armadillo....o....o...o  The armadillo

(After this use the same chord progression as the first verse)

The armadillo never sees me when I hit him with my brights.
His life don't flash before his eyes, he's blinded by my lights
And so I hit him with my bumper doin' sixty, sixty-five
They take 'em frozen down in Halletsville They don't take 'em alive.
The jackal cri....i....i...ied, the jackal cri....i....i...ied

The jackal cried, "Good God there's two of them a-walkin' down the line.
I can't believe my luck tonight this here makes twenty-nine!"
And so he rolled the first one runnin'. The second was too fast.
His brakes and laughter squealin' as he stomped down on the gas.
Good-God, his
The impact shook the river bed, his foot went through the floor
Forevermore....or....or...ore, Forevermore....or....or....ore

Forevermore was his last moment from the bridge wall to the stream;
From the speckled blood around his smile a-spewin' gasoline.
And then he screamed his raspy epitaph, before he turned to flame:
"They pay two-fifty down in Halletsville.... I ain't the one to blame....."
Ain't it a sha....a....a...ame, the jackal cri....i....i...ied
The armadillo....o....o...o The armadillo....o....o...o(repeat until fade)

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Tucker
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 05:15 AM

I'm back. Still facinated by this macrabe subject. Susan, squirrel is fantastic and makes the best gravey I have ever tasted, especially with a liberal dose of black pepper. so much for receipes. Not many armadillos here in Ohio but we sure do have a lot of Racoon and woodchuck to accompany Mr. Possum into the frying pan. Increasing amounts of deer too. Now if only a vegtable truck would wreak.......Driver surviving of course.......don't need him in the pot

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: AlistairUK
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 07:18 AM

Hey the query was answered I thought...nows the fun bit :o).

only joking ( I think)

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 12:02 PM

this 'ranks' right up thre with that great ballad "Pa Went to Sleep, and the Hogs Ate Him".....

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 03:34 PM

And my favorite:

"Twenty Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac"

Bob S.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Joe Offer
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 05:01 PM

Hey, bob and Bill, how can you taunt us with song titles like that without giving us LYRICS? I gotta hear these tow.
Say, Katlaughing, did you follow the armadillo links I posted? I'll admit the Jerry Jeff Walker song isn't about road kill, but it's a good one.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Hiroshi Ogura
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 08:38 PM

31 messages in this thread, and only two or three that deal with this song... Sheesh...

For those of you who are wondering, I did not make up the title: I heard this song in a local bluegrass jam. The chord progression is a typical bluegrass:

(G) I've got five pounds of possum in my (C) headlights (G) tonight And if I can get a piece of him (A) it'll be (D) alright (G) Biscuits and possum gravy -- (C) whatta (G) delight! Yeah, I've got five pounds of possum in my (D) headlights (G) tonight!

Thanks to Joe Offer for providing a link to the lyrics, but I'm sure that there were more verses than just those two that are listed there. It's up to all of you to hunt down (ugh) the song and post the complete lyrics.

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Apr 99 - 11:58 PM

Uh-Huh............Oh yeah....Sure.....

..."messages" in this "thread"
...providing a "link" to the "lyrics"
..."post" the complete lyrics

AND "Thanks to Joe Offer"......not Joe, mind you, but "Joe Offer"

All very Mudcatty for a guy who has posted twice, both on this thread!!!!! And Hiro my laddie buck, I guess you don't have a personal page yet huh? No e-mail either, right?

And Boy Oh Boy, what a stroke of luck hitting on a topic like Possum when so many of the "unwashed" have been having a good ol' time with the subject!!!

Will the coincidences never end???

Gimme' a fokkin' break here...SHEESH is right!

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: MMario
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 08:47 AM

Excuse me? " but I'm sure that there were more verses than just those two that are listed there. It's up to all of you to hunt down (ugh) the song and post the complete lyrics. "

I may be a bit thin-skinned, but THAT is a tone I do NOT care to hear...

MMario

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 12:28 PM

That's all the verses I have ever heard.

Joe: Posted the words to "20 Naked Pentacostals" in another thread awhile back. Even if I find it I don't know how to link to it.

Bob

I found it and added a link, Bob.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 12:53 PM

Mario...Bob...Hey guys, read my last post and the post by Ogura.......We're being HAD here guys...don't buy off!!!

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Susan A-R
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 11:16 PM

Ah Catspaw, who cares if it's real or not. It's FUN!! and sick enough to be right up our alley.

(I stil prefer squirel, and pigeon (or squab if you will)

Susan

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: catspaw49
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 11:36 PM

Possum is funnier Susan, but I think rabbit makes the best gravy!!!

catspaw

Subject: RE: Five Pounds of Possum
From: Margo
Date: 14 Apr 99 - 01:20 AM

Hey! you're talking about eating these critters, but I was bitten by a squirrel a week ago. Now the glands in my throat are swollen.....what's that? A glass of water? Oh no! NO! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........