BS: What phrases do you love :-)

Subject: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 07:24 AM

I love

What a load of Bollocks

You are talking out of your arse

all right our kid (but then I should as a brummie)

Put me on to your boss (when somebody is pissing you off - generally sales people)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 07:26 AM

What can I get you ?

eric

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 07:27 AM

I haven't had a shag for ages, can you help ?

eric

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Emma B
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 07:27 AM

Shall I drive?

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,CrazyEddie
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 10:48 AM

"No, It's my round, have a large one."

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Paul Burke
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 11:13 AM

Yes!!!yesyesyesyesurrrghnnnffff!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: JennyO
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 11:22 AM

"Relax - I'm cooking dinner tonight!"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Wesley S
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 11:38 AM

Here's your check.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Leadfingers
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 11:41 AM

Are you SURE thats all you want for doing a Gig ?

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: fat B****rd
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 11:41 AM

"No, you sit down, you've been at work all week"

"Must be jelly, jam don't shake like that"

"What sort of beer would you like this week ?"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Becca72
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 02:27 PM

"purrrrrrrr" (as spoken by 3 beautiful kitties all curled up on my lap)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 02:38 PM

As thick as two short planks

Strong as a fortnight and that's too weak

Daft as a brush

:D (tG)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: gnu
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 02:49 PM

CENSORED.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 02:50 PM

Two sandwiches short of a picnic

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Wesley S
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 02:51 PM

One taco short of a combo platter

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Becca72
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 03:38 PM

HIs/Her slinky is kinked

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 03:48 PM

"What he needs is a sound thrashing about the head and ears." An all-purpose saying of a long time gone friend of mine.

It just sounds so thorough.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: harpmolly
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 03:53 PM

A few phrases I picked up from my mom:

"Ive got a great memory, but it's short." ;)

"That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!"

And one I came up with on my own (a variation of the first one):

"Oh, I've got a mind like a steel sieve."

I've also cribbed a few expressions from wonderful author Terry Pratchett, just because I thought they were funny as hell. My fellow Americans do look at me as though I'm, er, a few pickles short of a picnic, though:

"Arrrrgh! I'm too short for this shit!"

"Pull the other one, it's got bells on."


:)

Molly

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:01 PM

You ARE a few pickels short of a picnic, man! Get a life, eh? Nobody reads them dumb books ennymore.

Here's my faverites:

FLIP OFF! UP YERS, BOLTHOLE! YOU FLIPPIN' RETREAD! EAT ME! She had a face like a flippin' dead owl! What the FLIP is that? Kiss the glove, fat boy! Hey, FLIPface! Right in the mungoberries! I'd flip her on a dime!

Well, those are some. I got others too, eh?

- Shane

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:23 PM

Wow I didn't know it could be this good!......also the best lie.......probably.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Slag
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 05:33 PM

"Here are your winnings, Mr. Slag."
"Faster, faster, harder, harder." (Well, you asked)
"Bank error in your favor, collect $200"
"No, just a warning this time." (Thank you officer!)
"My, what a wonderful painting!"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 03:15 AM

"Faster, faster, harder, harder." and Bob's your uncle

As a Brummie (born in Birmingham England for our American friends) this one really tickles my fancy

Brummangem screwdriver

Meaning A hammer.

Origin
The phrase has its source in the belief that people from the English West Midlands city of Birmingham (Brummagem) were unsophisticated and made crude goods - a predudice that persists in the UK today. Other places, notably Liverpool and Ireland, have suffered the same jibe more recently.
Brummagen is a slang version of Birmingham, which is a version of Bromwicham, itself a version of Brimidgeham, the old name for Birmingham. The Bromwicham form persists in the name of the town to the west of Birmingham - West Bromwich.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Elmer Fudd
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 03:20 AM

No good deed goes unpunished.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Gurney
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 03:46 AM

Kiwi ones:

"You can put a ring around that!"    (Correct; I agree.)
"She'll be right, mate." (It doesn't matter!) Oz too.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,Bruce Baillie
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 04:58 AM

...About as much good as a chocolate fireguard...
...not as long as I've got a hole in my arse!'
...She goes like a bag of peanuts at a chimps tea party...

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 05:14 AM

>>She goes like a bag of peanuts at a chimps tea party..<<

That one is really funny - I like it.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,Shimrod
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 06:24 AM

A phrase to be used when glimpsing a particularly attractive woman:

"She could have me - if she played her cards right."

And a phrase to be used when a male person has complimented, or attempted to 'chat up', a female person in a particularly unctuous and slimy manner:

"You're as smooth as two eels in a bucket of snot!"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Wilfried Schaum
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 06:58 AM

Phoning my wife:
"You know what?"
"Yes, I know, I love you, too."

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 07:06 AM

'Buy one, get one free'... love that phrase.... especially when applied to chocolate bars.

If it's a movie phrase you want... 'Werewolf.' 'There wolf.' has me creased up and squeaking every time.. it's just one of those throwaways that rarely get a mention (like Michael Caine in 'Educating Rita' declaring he was going to call himself Mary Shelley - entire cinema turns in silence to stare at loudly guffawing blonde), but are worth the cinema entry or DVD purchase price.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Alice
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 10:05 AM

From a customer "I need to buy a full page ad."

From my manager "You're doing a great job!"

From my son "Love you, mom."

From the roofing contractor "There's no water damage to the rafters."

From the news "Peace broke out in..."

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: JennyO
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 12:44 PM

"not the sharpest tack in the box"

"better than forty lashes with a wet noodle"

"you can feel it doing you harm!" - Terry Pratchett I believe

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 01:12 PM

In my town the traffic light for pedestrians says "Walk with light". I think that is grand.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: harpmolly
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 02:24 PM

JennyO-

Nanny Ogg alone could populate her own thread with pithy sayings! ;) Whether they'd be suitable for the kiddies or not is another question...

M

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Peace
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 02:29 PM

S/he has a face like a bulldog lickin' piss off a thistle.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 02:41 PM

Thanks Peace, just had my dinner (goes to puke bowl) :-)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: fat B****rd
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 02:41 PM

"You've mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,Bruce Baillie
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 03:06 AM

...As slick as a gob full of snot...

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: JennieG
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 03:54 AM

"The chocolate's free.....so is the coffee".

Unfortunately I haven't heard this one yet, it only exists in my imagination.

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 03:55 AM

ROTFLMAO Bruce Baillie :-)
Don't think I had better say that one to anybody who plays at my club :-)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 04:15 AM

As thick as pigshit in winter.
A face like a bag of spanners.

eric

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 05:03 AM

I'm going to invent another acronym.... KAKSOD

Killed Another Keyboard Squirting Out Drink.

If we're going down the traffic sign route, there is one near me that says 'Pedestrians wait for green man'. Just behind that is a sign that says 'Green Man 1 mile'...

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,JennyO
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 09:37 AM

Ah yes, harpmolly, that is true.

Here's another Terry Pratchett I like:

"It's a wise crow that knows which way the camel points!"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rman
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 10:49 AM

Referring to a bad darts player;

"Couldn't hit an elephant on the arse with a banjo"

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Mr Red
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 06:46 PM

all right our kid ????????

Yo aye speeeeekin ryeit owr kid - or is yowr accent tairnted wiv Lincolnshire?

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Janie
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 09:20 PM

Cattywhomped.

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 14 Aug 06 - 08:22 AM

My brummie accent is tainted with the Lincolnshire/Scottish/Dutch/Sarf dialects

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Al
Date: 14 Aug 06 - 09:23 AM

How unfortunate. (referring to a chinese fortune cookie missing its message)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Stu
Date: 14 Aug 06 - 09:45 AM

One for Villan:

Bostin!

As an expat Brummie I don't hear this much these days. For once, it feels bostin to be a Villa fan!

Kipper tie?

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: Rasener
Date: 14 Aug 06 - 09:55 AM

>>As an expat Brummie I don't hear this much these days. For once, it feels bostin to be a Villa fan!
<<

You can say that again,I say you can say that again. Expect record season ticket sales. All Villa suporters will be cock a hoop at the moment, until they lose to The Gunners :-) I'll bet those Blues supporters are dead jealous he he :-)

Subject: RE: BS: What phrases do you love :-)
From: GUEST,Snoozer (at work)
Date: 14 Aug 06 - 10:15 AM

He's as dumb as a bag of hammers.

And this one I just heard recently, but I think it will come in handy:
The epitome of delirium