BS: behind every man...

Subject: BS: behind every man...
From: tarheel
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 06:30 PM

A point of view... Barbara Walters of Television's 20/20 did a story on
gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan
conflict..She noted that women customarily walked 5 paces behind their
husbands.

She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind
their husbands. F rom Miss Walter's vantage point, despite the overthrow
of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to walk even
further back behind their husbands and are happy to maintain the old
custom.

Miss Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you
now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to
change?"

The woman looked Miss Walters straight in the eyes, and without
hesitation, said, "Land Mines."

MORAL OF THE STORY:
BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 06:38 PM

Aha! But is five paces enough of a safety margin?

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:06 PM

Depends on the mine, LH. 5 paces...say 30 inches to the pace...150 inches...better than 12 feet...that's enough for anti-personnel "toe popper" mines....

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Bill D
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:18 PM

VERY old joke...and Barbara Walters did & said no such thing. I heard that joke about the Korean war...and I'd bet it goes back further.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: bubblyrat
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:26 PM

" Gender " is a grammatical term. People have a "sex" ,ie male or female. Please do try to remember that, whilst also remembering that how other people choose to behave, in their own countries, need not concern those of us who might choose to behave differently. Feminist jokes, particularly those relating to land-mines ,should be carefully considered before being aired on the internet, where they might cause offence. Thankyou.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Peace
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:44 PM

From a blog where it is said to be "an actual letter sent to Proctor and Gamble".


Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core(tm) or Dri-Weave(tm) absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favourite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from "Aunt Flo". Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behaviour. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women.

In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... which brings me to the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period." Are you f-ing kidding me?

What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong", or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will, not for one minute, miss your brand of condescending bullsh[i!1l]t. And that's a promise I will keep... Always.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:55 PM

Brilliant. Too bad they didn't get about 500,000 of such letters.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Peace
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 07:59 PM

It was attributed on the blog, but I didn't want to put the woman's name here in case the attribution was wrong.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: folk1e
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 08:15 PM

there is a supprised woman!

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Bill D
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 08:17 PM

just to put the matter to rest


and from "Dave Barry's Blog:

"In the general context of above discussion, I recall an old anecdote about that sort of habits -- mighta been from WWII or Korea? Coulda been Italy, coulda been Asia?

The observer (a GI?) noticed that the man always walked in front, and his wife followed, when they were going to market, or to town, or whatever.

After a while, he noticed that the man allowed his wife to walk ahead.

When he asked the man why the change in lifestyle, the man replied, [remember, this was a war zone]

"Land mines."

Sorry, not funny, but illustrative of the MCP attitude that prevails, almost universally ..."

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Jeri
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 08:26 PM

What's 'MCP?

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Peace
Date: 18 Mar 07 - 08:29 PM

Molecular and Cellular Proteomics

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:19 PM

MCP must stand for male chauvinist something or other

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: GUEST,Seiri Omaar
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:24 PM

Pig?

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Peace
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:29 PM

That is the punchline to a joke about a speeding motorist.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:36 PM

No one will ever accuse Tarheel of contributing an original post. He rarely cites their sources, either.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Wesley S
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:45 PM

For that matter - he rarely returns to the thread.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: jeffp
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 02:48 PM

Except to fulminate against those who disagree with him and back it up with actual facts.

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Stringsinger
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 03:06 PM

bubblyrat,

"gender" has traditionally meant what you said but the definition has changed. Since the area of speech regarding this issue, "gender" has come in to a new usage.

I think that we can allow for new meanings when they are applied consistently.

Frank

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 19 Mar 07 - 04:08 PM

is an astonished mother in law!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: behind every man...
From: GUEST,ib48
Date: 20 Mar 07 - 03:29 PM

there is another man, in brighton