BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency

Subject: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 30 May 07 - 10:56 PM

I don't know how to do 'blue clickies' so I have to type this out ....many of you may have seen it but I thought it worth repeating.

May 1 2007: Washington, DC (AP) -- Congress today announced that the office of President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of July 1 2007. The move is being made in order to save the President's $500,000 yearly salary and also a record $521 BILLION in deficit expenditures and related overhead the office has incurred during the last five years. "We believe this is a wise financial move. The cost savings are huge " stated Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R-WA). "We cannot remain competitive on the world stage with the current level of cash outlay,"Reynolds noted.

Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of his termination. Preparations for the job move have been underway for some time.

Gurvinder Singh of IndusTeleservices, Mumbai, India will assume the office of President as of July 1 2007 Mr.Singh was born in the US while his Indian parents were vacationing at Niagara Falls thus making him eligible for the position He will receive a salary of $320 (USD) a month but with no health coverage or benefits.

It is believed that Mr. Singh will be able to handle his job responsibilities without a support staff. Due to the time difference between the US and India, he will be working primarily at night, when few offices ofhe US Government will be open. "Working nights will allow me to keep my day job at the Dehli Computer Call Center," stated Mr Singh in an exclusive interview. "I am excited abut this position . I always hoped I would be Presdident." A Congressional spokesperson noted that while Mr. Singh may not be fully aware of all the issues involved in the office of President, this should not be a problem as President Bush was not familiar with the issues either.

Mr. Singh will rely upon a script tree that will enable him to responsd effectively to most topics of concern. Using these canned responses, he can address common concerns without having to understand the underlying issue at all. "We know these scripting tools work," stated the spokesperson. "President Bush has used them successfully for years."

Bush will receive health coverage, expenses, and salary unti his final day of employment. Following a two week waiting period, he will be eligible for $140 a week unemployment for 13 weeks. Unfortunately he will not be eligible for Medicaid, as his unemployment benefits will exceed the allowed limit. Mr Bush has been provided the outplacement services of Manpower, Inc to help him write a resume and prepare for his upcoming job transition. According to Manpower, a Greeter position at Wal-Mart was suggested due to Bush's extensive experience shaking hands as well as that special smile.

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT........







Preparations for the j

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: mack/misophist
Date: 30 May 07 - 11:07 PM

Very funny but rather old. Some around here get grouchy about that.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Bill D
Date: 30 May 07 - 11:07 PM

Mr Singh will not receive a dime...or a farthing...until Mr. Bush ceases to appear on the TV with his incoherent blather....then Mr. Singh's salary with be parcelled out as our soldiers come home.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Sorcha
Date: 30 May 07 - 11:07 PM

You know, at this point, I could almost believe it. Could it be worse?

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 30 May 07 - 11:15 PM

Didn't know it was old -- apologies,,,,,I just received it today and had to share. And yes, at this stage, almost anyone could almost believe it.

Ugh.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Mrrzy
Date: 31 May 07 - 12:53 AM

Sigh - if only!

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: katlaughing
Date: 31 May 07 - 12:55 AM

I don't remember seeing it before, TRUEBRIT. Thanks for posting it. If only...damn near anything reasonable would be better than the shrub!

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Ron Davies
Date: 31 May 07 - 07:00 AM

It may be an oldie but it's definitely a goodie. Thanks!

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: kendall
Date: 31 May 07 - 07:28 AM

I've never seen it before either.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: pirandello
Date: 31 May 07 - 07:32 AM

I'd like to see the idiot Bush working a call centre-then again I'm not sure he could read the script without moving his lips.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: kendall
Date: 31 May 07 - 07:37 AM

Whenever I see something that is this riddled with spelling mistakes, I think, a little more attention to detail would lend it more credibility. Of course, this particular piece is totally INcredible no matter what you do to it.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Bobert
Date: 31 May 07 - 07:37 AM

Can I hold the door for ya, George???

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 31 May 07 - 10:35 PM

Good - so glad not everyone had seen it -- I loved it. I am so damn tired of this man.........

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Ron Davies
Date: 31 May 07 - 10:45 PM

Particularly liked the "canned responses"--used successfully by Bush for years. Actually we could save even more money--and just set up a machine to give the meaningless responses--and a drivel-swamped speech once in a while.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 31 May 07 - 10:54 PM

We could indeed, and lose nothing in the process! Don't you just hate the sound of his voice - I find myself reaching to turn off the radio as soon as I hear it -- makes my skin crawl...

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Riginslinger
Date: 01 Jun 07 - 06:10 PM

Will Mr. Singh be able to speak English so you can understand it, or will he sound like one of those telemarketers?

             Or does it even matter?

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Ron Davies
Date: 01 Jun 07 - 10:43 PM

Actually Bush can be a self-satisfied twit--which is what he sounds like to me--all he wants and I'd have no problem. Were it not for all the needless death and destruction he has caused---and since he's made Iraq a terror training ground--continues to cause. That's what makes my skin crawl.

As does the fact that the US electorate has so many sheep--more than willing to switch off their brains--since that's what it takes to vote for him.

Why, we even have a few Mudcatters who qualify.

The crux of it is--propaganda works, unfortunately.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Peace
Date: 01 Jun 07 - 10:54 PM

Word on the street is that William Shatner has applied for and got the posting.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 01 Jun 07 - 11:19 PM

Well - like Fred Thompson, perhaps one can say he looks the part!

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Peace
Date: 01 Jun 07 - 11:56 PM

Well, he intends to change The Presidential Succession Act of 1947 as soon as he takes office.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 02 Jun 07 - 02:37 PM

Peace -- exhibiting my ignorance but what is that (I did ask my husband - the American and the lawyer -- one and the same, not wo people!!!) and he didnt know.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Ron Davies
Date: 03 Jun 07 - 11:53 AM

I'm not sure either--but my guess would be the act that prevented a president from serving more than 2 4-year terms. After FDR, there was a lot of sentiment--never again. But I think Peace is pulling our collective leg--not that he's ever done such a thing in the past.

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 03 Jun 07 - 12:49 PM

So I can reassure my husband, who is actually quite smart (!) that he should not worry about not knowing this act!!!!!!!!! OK Peace, we have found you out!

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: Peace
Date: 03 Jun 07 - 04:14 PM

The Presidential Succession Act is the order of who becomes President in the event the President dies or becomes unable to perform his duties. If catastrophe struck and lots of high-up people died, who becomes what? There were PSAs in 1792, 1886, 1947, and a recent addition had the Secretary of Homeland Security added to the list. There's an excellent article about it here. The Act has an interesting history, and the article I linked to (Wikipedia) has a few things most of us don't think about or know. I kinda went "Wow!" with the following:

"Presidents who became president by succession

Chester A. Arthur
Calvin Coolidge
Millard Fillmore
Gerald R. Ford *
Andrew Johnson
Lyndon B. Johnson
Theodore Roosevelt
Harry S. Truman
John Tyler"

(The aztrix/atorix/astiricks/ star indicates that Ford became President upon Nixon's resignation; all the rest because the President had died.)

Subject: RE: BS: Congress votes to oursource Presidency
From: TRUBRIT
Date: 03 Jun 07 - 08:43 PM

maybe I will have to let my husband onto Mudcat so he can read this post.....