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BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 30 Nov 07 - 10:26 AM Must be! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Amos Date: 29 Nov 07 - 11:39 PM LOL!!! I think you got the rights of the matter. Must be the carbon emissions, I guess. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 29 Nov 07 - 10:26 PM Amos - I think you've hit on what it is that's been missing in all of this Itelligent Design thing. goD made the world, time passed, he developed Alzheimer's, and now he can't remember what he said to whom, or where things are placed, or... The whole thing is running on auto-pilot, unless he happens to slip in the bathtub and cause a hurricane, or an earthquake, or something... And from time to time he drops his cigar and starts a fire in Southern California, and... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Amos Date: 29 Nov 07 - 02:53 PM That assumes goD is the Master. Otherwise, his plan may be just some side-line chcanery. One should not rule out the notion that he is less of an Indomitable Paternal Force, and more of a skimpy, impish, dwarfish sort of trouble-maker, a goblin-goddity who likes to stick his oar in at random intervals just to see how much confusion it causes, like a small boy armed with a stick confronting an anthill. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 29 Nov 07 - 02:29 PM In any event, Richard Roberts says that goD told him to resign from the university. And we know goD told Georgie to invade Iraq, so one has to wonder what the master plan is. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Art Thieme Date: 29 Nov 07 - 01:24 PM Oral retentive!? Art |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: harpmolly Date: 29 Nov 07 - 03:35 AM *delurking* If that's Jude Law's younger brother, *I'd* like to know him. ;) *relurking* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 28 Nov 07 - 01:43 PM Does he know Christian Law? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Donuel Date: 28 Nov 07 - 01:27 PM this reminds me Gonzales is now in charge of overseeing Christian Law Schools. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 28 Nov 07 - 12:55 PM Yeah, if it went for prophets they'd have to pay taxes. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Amos Date: 28 Nov 07 - 11:47 AM In this country we call that a not-for-prophet organization. A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Donuel Date: 28 Nov 07 - 11:20 AM Its OK to be a prophet as long as you take a vow of poverty as I have. I have paid thousands of dollars to deliver them, not sell them. My prophesy (made 13 weeks ago) that the Bush family would have suffered a significant personal loss this week was a total bust so it seems I am a pretty lousy prophet. The only thing W has suffered this week is a bogus peace conference and the resignation of his econmomic advisor which is not exactly personal or significant. Is it a crime to commit Oral Roberts in Georgia? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: GUEST,PMB Date: 28 Nov 07 - 10:25 AM I would have thought the son of Oral Roberts would be Anal Roberts? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 28 Nov 07 - 10:16 AM Oral Robbers University? Uh, O Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 28 Nov 07 - 10:12 AM And now some dizzy idiot is giving Oral Robers University seventy million dollars. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 25 Nov 07 - 09:58 AM Love the sign, Art. A major step forward in advertising. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Art Thieme Date: 24 Nov 07 - 10:33 PM Folks, thanks for your kind words. They're appreciated. An aside: In 1965 I was the Assistant Manager of the Old Town Folklore Center in Chicago. The manager, John Carbo, had to leave town and left it to me to do the front window for a big Christmas sale he was planning. Well, I did a fine job, if I do say so myself. It looked wonderful. But the highlight was a sign I'd made that said: JESUS SAVES----WHY NOT YOU!!! BIG YULE SALE!!!!! I thought it was pretty good. But many others did not agree. Art |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: GUEST,dianavan Date: 24 Nov 07 - 07:08 PM Good! When are people going to realize that most of these Evangelists are no better than 'snake oil' salesmen? Its sad when the name of Christ is used in vain. I think its also a sin, according to the bible. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Ron Davies Date: 24 Nov 07 - 12:46 AM Richard Roberts has resigned. Source AP. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 23 Oct 07 - 03:43 PM Well, the way I see it, Molly, all the really interesting people are going to be down in Hell, anyway. Can you imaging having to shout "Praise the Lord!" every five or ten seconds--for all eternity!?? *Shudder*. Don Firth (Oh, boy! God's gonna get me for that!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: harpmolly Date: 22 Oct 07 - 10:50 PM Tee hee... I remember walking down the street in Portland once and seeing a guy with a sandwich board listing all the things that would purportedly send one south in a big hurry. So I stopped and started reading the board, which made him perk up hopefully. Then I looked thoughtful and started counting on my fingers, muttering "Yeah, I suppose I'd have to count that one...nope, haven't managed to score that one yet...well, that one's physically impossible..." until I finally announced, "Looks like I'm doing pretty well, I've managed to cover most of your list!" He furrowed his brow and said heatedly, "Well, then you're going straight to HELL!" At which point I smiled my sunniest pixie grin and said sweetly, "At least I won't have to run into you there...", turned on my heel and walked away. It felt great. Molly (And just in case anyone feels I was being cruel to the poor well-meaning pilgrim, one of the prominently displayed slogans on his sign was "GOD HATES FAGS!" I can't be having with that shite.) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 22 Oct 07 - 07:20 PM Somebody must have cured Oral Roberts. He's back! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 13 Oct 07 - 08:28 AM The world would be a better place if it could just be saved from the likes of Oral Roberts. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 12 Oct 07 - 11:04 PM "Have you been Saved?" [Looking around anxiously] "From what? From WHAT!??" or "Well. yes. I was saved from a 30 foot python once! Sorry, I gotta go!" Once during the 1960s, some local Bible college sent a bunch of students to Seattle's University District on a crusade to try to save "the hippies." Folk singer on not, I was not exactly a hippy, but I spent a lot of time in the U. District, I got hit on a lot! Those were two of a number of prepared responses that I used. All kindsa neat answers if you tend to be a bit of a smart-ass. Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Rapparee Date: 12 Oct 07 - 05:11 PM My first grad school go-round, I was rooming with a guy from Nigeria. He and his friends were good Lutherans, and often spoke to local churches about life in Nigeria. They wore Nigerian clothing to do this. My roommate had done his undergraduate work at Oxford and spoke English with an Oxonian accent. Great guy. One day he and two of his friends were going to speak and were waiting for their ride to come. A knock came on the door, and he answered it. It was one of those EXTREMELY obnoxious door-to-door religion salesfolk. My roommate listened politely to the spiel, and when he was invited to attend church services, he replied, "Why, yes, of course. And I'm certain you'd like to attend ours. We're just getting started in fact, and you can have the privilege of holding the goat as we cut its throat." There was a sort of strangled sound and feet running; my roommate was chuckling as he closed the door. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 12 Oct 07 - 04:49 PM My family was what I would call 'spiritual," and we did go to church often when I was young, but we never subscribed to any particular denomination. My mother especially read a lot about Eastern beliefs. She had a lot of questions, but she wasn't willing to accept just any old answers. I'm pretty much the same way, I guess. I maintain that spirituality, religion, or philosophical belief is—or, at least should be—a "way of life," and it should enlighten how you live your life and how you treat other people. Is there a God? I have no idea. Neither do you. If there is some sort of Supreme Being who created all of this, then it will be an entity so different from what we, as mere humans, are able to even contemplate or conceive of that, although an interesting object of speculation, the idea that someone may know what is "in the Mind of God" is downright delusional! Do I have an after-life? Other that having been preached at a lot, I have no reason to believe so. But I don't rule the possibility out. After all, I've read enough science fiction and science fact and speculation (e.g., Parallel Worlds by theoretical physicist Michio Kaku, dealing with string theory, multiple dimensions, and the likelihood of "multiverses"). Who knows? When you die, you may just wink out. But I (like most people) have a hard time conceiving of my own non-existence in one form or another. Perhaps when my time comes, my awareness simply slips into another dimension or "multiverse" and starts another life. Personal salvation? Being "saved?" Being "washed in the Blood of the Lamb?" (Sounds kinda messy!) Doesn't concern me. I figure that if I'm true to my own ethical and moral code and maintain my own personal integrity, I'll be all right whatever happens to me when I topple off the twig. I figure that if there is an afterlife, it will be a whole new adventure. It will have little to do with harp-playing angels, pink clouds, and streets paved with gold (kinda garish, that—also sounds sorta boring, especially if it lasts for Eternity!). Nor will it have anything to do with Satan and Eternal Hellfire. These are all human constructs. Do you need the reward of Heaven (cookie), or the fear of Hellfire (spanking), to prevent you from misbehaving and keep you a good person? If so, you're still a child. You've never actually grown up. If there is an afterlife, it will be entirely different from what we think. BUT—if there is no afterlife, I will have no awareness with which to be disappointed! So why sweat it? So—I go to church from time to time. Why? Nice bunch of people. The pastor talks mostly about being kind to each other and helping each other in times of need, matters of peace, non-violent conflict resolution, moral and ethical issues (beyond the merely sexual ones that many church leaders seem to be so hung up on). Excellent music director, several good musicians. Good choir that tackles, not just the standard hymns, but a bit of Bach or Mozart from time to time. And a bit of ritual that helps to keep one grounded sometimes. And not much in the way of the usual religious clichés. And being a Lutheran church, the after-service cuppa coffee is regarded as one of the Holy Sacrements. :-) And the members of the congregation, including the pastor: I can't imagine any one of them saying something like "Have you discovered Jesus?" or "Have you allowed Jesus into your life?" I think they would choke and have a purple-faced coughing fit before they could get anything like that out! Spirituality is a matter of questions. Creation—Life, the Universe, Everything—is Very Mysterious. One scientist (and trying to separate religion and science seems to lack a certain Cosmic Integrity) has said that we know only about 4% of what there is to know about the Cosmos. The problem is that the more we learn, the more we learn how much more there is to learn, and that figure goes down to 3%. Questions. What is the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything?" "42" is as good an answer as anything else you're laible to hear, in church or out. Anybody heard Iris Dement's song "Let the Mystery Be?" Religious dogma—any religious dogma—is the enemy of spirituality. Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 12 Oct 07 - 11:28 AM My response these days is, "No thank you." If the individual(s) persist, I can and do get a tad abrasive. But not harshly so. Something simple like "Kindly fu#k off, please!" That never fails. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 12 Oct 07 - 11:14 AM Religious people who wish to evangelize are a royal pain in the arse, IMO. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: frogprince Date: 12 Oct 07 - 11:11 AM Forgive me if this is drift, but: I wouldn't try to count the times I've heard evangelicals say of Christianity, "It isn't a religion, it's a way of life". I had to blink, and then laugh, a few years ago, when I first heard a neo-pagan "witnessing", and she piped up with "It isn't a religion, it's a way of life". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Riginslinger Date: 12 Oct 07 - 08:23 AM "'(I'm not talking about Jehovah's Witnesses or Mormons, by the way. I have not been accosted by them for a long time but with them I'm more polite, just saying something like "Thank you, but I'm not interested.'" I usually tell them I'm not superstitious |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Ebbie Date: 12 Oct 07 - 12:00 AM The last two times I've been 'cornered and worked on' on a public sidewalk, I had fire and brimstone called upon my head. I start out mildly, telling them that I understand that they feel compelled to ask the "question" but that I personally believe that it's not only rude but counterproductive. From there it gets worse. I quote scripture right back at them and they (each time it was a 40ish man) tell me that I have a "proud heart" and I end up telling them to get the hell out of there. The last time I didn't get mad but the time before I did, taking a step toward him- he really thought I was going to hit him with my shoulder bag. I'm not so sure that I wasn't, had he not skedaddled. I no longer have time for politeness with those guys. At the very least I give them something to report. (I'm not talking about Jehovah's Witnesses or Mormons, by the way. I have not been accosted by them for a long time but with them I'm more polite, just saying something like "Thank you, but I'm not interested." Basically just what I tell telemarketers. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Ron Davies Date: 11 Oct 07 - 10:24 PM I used to have a co-worker named Art, who used to talk about asking girls to pose nude for the sake of Art. Art--did that subject ever come up? Perhaps a story? (Or maybe not) Thread topic? What topic? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 11 Oct 07 - 09:53 PM I'll second that for sure. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Ron Davies Date: 11 Oct 07 - 09:51 PM Well, I think this thread is worthwhile just for giving Art a set-up to tell us about his dog and Oral Roberts. It's a companion to his story about his dog getting its tail stuck in the door--another classic. We are so lucky to have Art on Mudcat. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Folkiedave Date: 11 Oct 07 - 05:46 AM Thanks for that Don, I knew as soon as I said "I was a card carrying atheist" the first time it was a huge mistake and rottweiler and pork chop was a good description. However the young man in question did not get any brownie points. I found the second time (not speaking Yiddish) that Catalan worked just as well!! Dave |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 10 Oct 07 - 08:50 PM Conversation opener? Well, maybe. But not just. It's an attempt to "save your soul." If you answer in the affirmative, be prepared to join them in a lot of "Praising the Lord," and such. Of course, it does unload the next volley that they're so eager to fire—but be careful! This should only be attempted by a professional! If you answer in the negative (which is what they really hope, because if they can save your soul, that earns them another brownie point in Heaven), they will be on you like a Rottweiler on a pork chop, and you're in for the full evangelization treatment. There are a couple of aspects to this. First of all, despite it's basically selfish motive (the aforementioned brownie points), it is well-intentioned. They want to save your soul from Eternal Hell-Fire. That's very kind of them. But they are also making some pretty arrogant assumptions: that their religious beliefs are absolutely and eternally the correct ones, transcend all others, including whatever your beliefs might be; that you haven't already been "saved," and that even if you already go regularly to a Christian church, that their particular brand of Christianity is the right one, and yours is not. No matter how humbly they come on, there is a good measure of smug superiority involved. Does the expression "holier than thou" ring a bell? Conversation starter? Oh, yeah! I have been cornered and worked on many times. Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 10 Oct 07 - 08:18 PM Respond in Yiddish and they back off. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Folkiedave Date: 10 Oct 07 - 07:20 PM I am UK and I have visited the USA twice - not the usual Florida thing we Brits do, but a house swap in Oregon and a folky thing in Pennsylvania. On each occasion I have met people who began 1. a conversation with "Have you discovered Jesus?" and 2. "Have you allowed Jesus into your life?" This is a conversation opener? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: chazkratz Date: 10 Oct 07 - 06:46 PM Art, I just found the tape of "Outright Boldfaced Lies" you sent me and listened to it this morning, cracking up again at "The Great Turtle Drive"--Studs Turtle, indeed, and was again blown away by your wonderful guitar playing and banjo picking--"Scotland the Brave?--wow! And, of course, the original Oral Roberts joke in "The Split Dog." When is that wonderful collection going to appear on CD? I am currently listening to "The Older I Get the Better I Was," and the older this first CD is, the better it gets. I found it about the same time I found the tape. Folks, those of you who know Art only by his wonderful Mudcat presence should treat yourself to his music--I have no other records among my collection that I treasure as I do Art's CDs and tape. His singing and story telling, guitar and banjo and jaw harp playing, all are exceptional and emotionally evocative. If I seem a bit of a sycophant in regard to Art, so be it--in my mind he can walk on water. Charles |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Skivee Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:52 PM Anita Bryant. I knew someone who worked for her. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:06 PM Sorry. Typo. "What I am anti are. . . ." Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:03 PM The Lord's Annointed. There was a reasonably well-know pop singer (not rock) a few decades back who would take popular songs (and even the occasional rock song) and re-write them a bit, basically trying to make religious songs out of them. She was definitely of the fundamentalist/evangelist bent. She had a nice singing voice. Quite listenable. But I, personally, found her re-writes a bit pompous and pretentious, and not just a little intrusive, hence irritating. She was the commercial spokesperson for the Florida citrus industry and appeared on TV a lot, hawking Florida orange juice along with a little cartoon "orange-bird." At one point, she went on a Holy Crusade. Miami-Dade County, where she lived, had an ordinance protecting the civil rights of homosexuals. She spearheaded a campaign to get the ordinance repealed. She based her campaign on "Christian beliefs regarding the sinfulness of homosexuality." She didn't at all mind being a controversial figure, and claimed that "The Lord has His hand on me!" One of my co-workers at the time, who happened to be gay, remarked that "If the Lord really had His hand on her, He would have put it over her big mouth!" I am not anti-religious. My wife and I belong to a neighborhood church, and have for nearly thirty years. We've both served on the church council and as assisting ministers. What I anti are hypocritical pompous twits, especially those who try to cram their religious beliefs down other peoples' throats. Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:38 PM They had a very nice doghouse though. I understand it only cost about $12,000. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: frogprince Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:46 AM Our "don't mess with God's anointed" guest reminds me of being trapped one evening listening to a guy reminisce about his visit to Jim and Tami's resort. "You could just tell", said he, with a slight tremble in his voice, "that you were standing on HOLY GROUND". The law caught up with the Bakers a few days later. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Bill D Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:21 AM "what ya say when you stub yer toe." my daddy said "goddandruffandsomeofititches" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:59 AM Say that ten times fast: God's annointed, God's annointed, God's annointed . . . . Strange, huh? Sounds like a cross between what ya say when someone sneezes and what ya say when you stub yer toe. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Peace Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:57 AM "and touch not God's annointed" God's annointed what? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Donuel Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:24 AM I believe that this whole story pertains to Oral Roberts' son and not Oral Roberts. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:31 PM By the way, it was not Ralph Sanders, it was Ralph Sander. No "s." Like I said: You get your facts straight! Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Here We Go Again: Oral Roberts From: Don Firth Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:28 PM GUEST, Monsieur of the harp, I'm afraid it is for you to get your facts straight. When it finally blew up in his face, your Holy Brother's impromptu twice-yearly sojourns to points South, accompanied by underage females, was in both Seattle newspapers and on the radio. Quite an embarrassing scandal. The Revival Center tried mightily to cover it up, but the kitty-cat was very much out of the bag. Some of the local radio personalities of a more humorous bent (e.g., fellows like Bob Hardwick of KVI) had quite a field day at the time, yucking it up. Hypocrites, when exposed, usually don't get much mercy, especially from local comics. Sorry, Harpo. No sale! Don Firth |
