ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in

Subject: Lyr Add: MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN^^
From: Jacob Bloom
Date: 03 Dec 99 - 05:12 PM

Three verses to My God How The Money Rolls In

My father makes book on the corner
My mother makes second hand gin
My sister makes love for a dollar
My God, how the money rolls in

CHORUS: Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in, rolls in
Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in

My grandma makes pink prophylactics
She pierces the end with a pin
My grandpa gets rich on abortions
My God, how the money rolls in

My brother's a poor missionary
He saves gorgeous women from sin
He'll save you a blond for five dollars
My God, how the money rolls in

Subject: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,Kasper
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 07:04 AM

Not the version that's in the DT! Bits I can remember:

My father prints counterfeit money,
My mother makes synthetic gin,
My sister makes love for a penny
And Lord how the pennies roll in!
Cho. Oh Lord, oh Lord, etc.

My uncle's a Harley St. surgeon
With instruments long sharp and thin.
He only does one operation,
But Lord how the guineas roll in.

My brother's a slum missionary,
A-saving young ladies from sin.
He'll save you a nice blonde for a shilling [5p!]
And Lord how the shillings roll in.

My cousin's an agent for Franco
[...]
If Franc needs a gun or a tank-o
He just gives my brother a ring.
[Pesetas in this chorus]

And lots more verses -- anybody got 'em? any other info would be welcome too.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: oldhippie
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 07:09 AM

My father makes books on the corner
My mother makes second-hand gin
My sister makes love for a dollar
My god, how the money rolls in.
(Chorus)
Rolls in, rolls in
My god how the money rolls in, rolls in
Rolls in, rolls in,
My god, how the money rolls in.

My brother's a poor missionary
He saves fallen women from sin
He'll save you a broad for five dollars
My god, how the money rolls in.

(Chorus)

Now my grandma sells cheap prophylactics
She punctures the head with a pin
While grandpa gets rich from abortions
My god, how the money rolls in.

(Chorus)

Now my uncle is whittling out candles
From wax that is specially soft
He says that they'll come in real handy
If ever his business falls off.

(Chorus)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Cattail
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 07:20 PM

Hi Kasper.

There is a version of this here.

http://www.armadillo.net/llewtrah/how-money-rolls-in.html

Hope this helps

Cattail !

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 07:35 PM

This song, found wherever English-speaking peoples live, seemingly was first published by Sandburg, 1927, "American Songbag."
There are a number of versions.
According to Randolph-Legman, it appeared in print in "A Collection of Sea Songs and Ditties," by "Dave E. Jones," 1928. It is generally classed as a variant on "My father Was Hung" (for a horse-thief).

Undoubtedly versions in Mudcat threads, if one searches.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: EBarnacle
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 11:03 PM

You can also find several verses referred to in Heinlein's "Stranger in a Strange Land."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 13 Oct 07 - 11:34 PM

See thread 15846 and other threads linked there-
Money Rolls

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 04:35 AM

My aunt runs a girls seminary
A'teaching young girls to begin
She doesn't tell them where to finish
My god how the money rolls in.

G

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: gnomad
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 07:59 AM

Other variants/additions:

My father makes book on the corner,
My mother makes illicit gin,
My sister sells kisses to sailors,
My God, how the moneys rolls in.

My aunty's a bawdy-house keeper,
Each night as the evening grows dim,
She hangs out a little red lantern,
My God, how the money rolls in.

My uncle's a registered plumber,
His business is in holes and tin,
He'll plug up your hole for a tanner,
My God, how the money rolls in.

My cousin's a barmaid in Grimsby,
For a shilling she'll strip to the skin,
She's stripping from morning 'til midnight,
My God, how the money rolls in.

final verse:

I've lost all my cash on the horses,
I'm sick from the illicit gin,
I'm falling in love with my brother,
My God, what a state I am in.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Flash Company
Date: 14 Oct 07 - 11:30 AM

My sister's a famed tattoo'd lady,
With pictures all over her skin,
For ten bob she'll show you her etchings,
My word how the money rolls in.....

I'm away for two weeks and this is what happens!

FC

Subject: Lyr Add: MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 10:30 PM

An excerpt from the book, The Erotic Muse: American Bawdy Songs, by Ed Cray, can be seen at Google Book Search:

1. My father makes illegal whiskey.
My mother makes illegal gin.
My sister sells sin in the corner.
My God, how the money rolls in!

CHORUS: Rolls in, rolls in,
My God, how the money rolls in, rolls in!
Rolls in, rolls in,
My God, how the money rolls in!

2. We've started an old-fashioned gin shop,
A regular palace of sin.
The principal girl is my grandmother.
My God, how the money rolls in!

3. My brother's a curate in Sydney.
Hes saving poor girlies from sin.
He'll save you a blonde for a dollar.
My God, how the money rolls in!

4. Grandmother makes cheap prophylactics.
She punctures the end with a pin.
Grandfather performs the abortions.
My God, how the money rolls in!

5. My bonnie has tuberculosis.
My bonnie has only one lung.
My bonnie spits blood in her pocket
And uses it for chewing gum.

6. My uncle whittles out candles
With wax especially soft.
He says it will come in handy,
If ever his business drops off.

7. My sister was once a virgin.
She didn't know how to begin.
I showed her the tricks of the trade.
My God, how the money rolls in!

Subject: Lyr Add: MY FATHER WAS HUNG (from Vance Randolph)
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 15 Oct 07 - 10:45 PM

Roll Me in Your Arms: "Unprintable" Ozark Folksongs and Folklore by Vance Randolph, 1992, contains this related song:

MY FATHER WAS HUNG

My father was hung for a horse-thief.
My mother was burnt for a witch.
I've got five sisters more in the whorehouse,
And myself, I'm a son of a bitch.

CHORUS: Oh, all gone, all gone!
The devil it matters to you, and you!
All gone, all gone,
And they left me some fucking to do.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Charley Noble
Date: 19 Jan 08 - 10:59 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: The Walrus
Date: 20 Jan 08 - 03:36 AM

The tune is the same as that for "Shine your buttons with Brasso" yes?

W

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Snuffy
Date: 20 Jan 08 - 07:10 PM

The tune is "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean", which has been pressed into service for no end of parodies etc

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: pavane
Date: 21 Jan 08 - 03:38 AM

Jim Dixon's link to the Erotic Muse shows a page which refers to the original song being about John Hewson.

This (1650's?) print appears to be the song he refers to:

Hewson's lamentation

Subject: Lyr Add: SLICHTIT NANCY / SLIGHTED NANCY
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 08:10 AM

The second verse of this song has a strong resemblance to MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN.

From The Scottish Songs By Robert Chambers, 1829, page 148ff, where it is said to come from The Tea-Table Miscellany, Ramsay, 1724.

SLICHTIT NANCY.

TUNE—Nobody coming to marry me.

IT'S I hae seven braw new gouns,
And ither seven better to mak';
And yet, for a' my new gouns,
My wooer has turn'd his back.
Besides, I have seven milk-kye,
And Sandy he has but three;
And yet, for a' my gude kye,
The laddie winna hae me.

My daddie's a delver o' dykes,
My mother can card and spin,
And I'm a fine fodgel lass,
And the siller comes linkin' in;
The siller comes linkin' in,
And it is fou fair to see,
And fifty times wow! O wow!
What ails the lads at me?

Whenever our Bawty does bark,
Then fast to the door I rin,
To see gin ony young spark
Will licht and venture but in;
But never a ane will come in,
Though mony a ane gaes by;
Syne ben the house I rin,
And a weary wicht am I.

When I was at my first prayers,
I pray'd but anes i' the year,
I wish'd for a handsome young lad,
And a lad wi' muckle gear.
When I was at my neist prayers,
I pray'd but now and than,
I fash'd na my head about gear,
If I got a handsome young man.

Now I am at my last prayers,
I pray on baith nicht and day,
And, oh, if a beggar wad come,
With that same beggar I'd gae.
And, oh, and what'll come o' me!
And, oh, and what'll I do!
That sic a braw lassie as I
Should die for a wooer, I trow!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: masato sakurai
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 09:17 AM

From Allan Ramsay, The Tea-table Miscellany (1788 ed., pp. 21-22):

SLIGHTED NANSY

Tune, The Kirk wad let me be.

'Tis I have seven braw new gowns,
And ither seven better to mak,
And yet, for a' my new gowns,
My wooer has turn'd his back.
Besides I have seven milk-kye,
And Sandy he has but three;
And yet, for a' my good kye,
The laddie winna ha'e me.

My dadie's a delver o' dykes,
My mither can card and spin,
And I am a fine fodgel lass,
And the siller comes linkan in;
The siller comes linkan in,
And it is fou fair to see,
And fifty times wow! O wow!
What ails the lads at me?

When ever our Baty does bark,
Then fast to the door I rin,
To see gin ony young spark
Will light and venture but in;
But never a ane will come in,
Though mony a ane gaes by,
Syne far ben the house I rin;
And a weary wight am I.

When I was at my first pray'rs,
I pray'd but anes i' the year,
I wish'd for a handsome young lad,
And a lad with muckle gear.
When I was at my neist pray'rs,
I pray'd but now and than,
I fash'd na my head about gear,
If I get a handsome young man.

Now when I'm at my last pray'rs,
I pray on baith night and day,
And O! if a beggar wad come,
With that same beggar I'd gae.
And O! and what'll come o' me!
And O! and what'll I do?
That sic a braw lassie as I
Should die for a wooer I trow.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Charley Noble
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 09:48 AM

Evidently this ditty went to sea as this verse was collected by Frederick Pease Harlow on the ship Akbar in the 1870's:

My father's a hedger and ditcher;
My mother does nothing but spin,
While I hunt whales for aliving --
Good Lord how the money comes in!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 05:48 PM

Are we all sure Tom Lehrer had nothing whatever to do with this? It sure could have been one of his twisted ditties.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,archie robertson
Date: 22 Jan 08 - 06:06 PM

my fathers a blackmarket gardener,
my mother makes illicit gin,
my sister sells sin on the corner,
o lord how the money rolls in

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST
Date: 28 Jul 20 - 01:31 AM

First verse not listed here, but it started the song when I heard it and was followed by the verses posted above or very close variants ... these words seem quite different suggesting a corporate approach to family money making, yet along the same theme and the following verses are the same as above ... I heard this verse in an Australian context and it is definitely at least half a century old given the sources that I have seen it printed in mid century university song anthologies, but possibly closer to the 1920s/1930s ...


We've shares in the very best companies
In tobacco and tramways and tin
We've brothels in Rio de Janeiro
My God how the money rolls in!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST
Date: 28 Jul 20 - 01:34 AM

Oh BTW ... when I heard it sing or saw it printed the song was always referred to as "we've shares in the very best companies"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,Joseph Scott
Date: 04 Aug 20 - 06:46 PM

"... the old song:
My father saws wood for a living
My brother sells whisky and gin
My mother and sister do washing
And, oh, how the money rolls in."

-- Cedar Rapids Gazette 7/29/1903

The general idea was adopted for blues songs, such as "My mammy takes in washing while I ball the jack" in "Hesitation Blues" by 1919 (Blake B. Harrison, Frank C. Brown collection).

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Lighter
Date: 04 Aug 20 - 09:06 PM

Just f'rinstance....


Allan Ramsey, The Tea-Table Miscellany (Edinburgh, 1723):

SLIGHTED NANSY

Tune.--The kirk wad let me be.

. . .
My daddy's a delver of dikes,
My mither can card and spin,
And I am a fine fodgel lass,
And the siller comes linkin in.

The siller comes linkin in,
And it is fou fair to see,
And fifty times wow! O wow!
What ails the lads at me?

["Fodgel" = buxom.]

------

Des Moines Register (March 17, 1886), p. 3:

"Singing, 'Good Lord! how the money rolls in!'"

------


Day Book (Chicago) (July 15, 1916), p. 14:

"My sister she works in a laundry,
My father he fiddles for tin,
My mother she ta-akes in washing,
Oh, my! how the money rolls in!"

["Tin" was a common 19th century slang term for money.]

------

C. L. Edson, The Gentle Art of Columning (N.Y.,1920):

“There is an old barroom ballad with the refrain: ‘My Gawd, How The Money Rolls In!’ During the early days of America's participation in the war, a contributor signing the name Sib started a series in B. L. T.'s column by saying that this is the way the Tommies chant it in Flanders:

        Me mother's an apple pie baker,
        Me father he fiddles for gin,
        Me sister she sings for a shilling;
        My Gawd, how the money rolls in!”                                 

-----
A. Hyatt Verrill, The Real Story of the Whaler (N.Y., 1923):

"The sweating, oil-soaked, greasy crew would burst into some such song as:

My father's a hedger and ditcher,
My mother does nothing but spin,
While I hunt whales for a living—
Good Lord, how the money comes in."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Lighter
Date: 04 Aug 20 - 09:36 PM

Not forgetting:

Popular song: “How the Money Rolls In,” by Jean C. Havez & Ted S. Barron (1879-1943), Metropolis Music Co., crt. May 6, 1913.

The chorus begins, “My mother’s a fancy dress-maker.”

-----------

International Socialist Review (Dec., 1915):

"Here's an old verse of an old song. If anybody knows more verses to the same song, send 'em in:

My mother she takes in washing,
My father he fiddles for gin,
My sister she works in a laundry,
My God! how the money rolls in!"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,J. Russ -
Date: 04 Jul 23 - 05:58 PM

this is what I can recall from 60+ years ago when we sang it in the fraternity


Our family’s business is booming,
I hardly know where to begin.
We answer man’s needs and desires.
My God, how the money rolls in!

Rolls in, rolls in, my God, how the money rolls in, rolls in!
Rolls in, rolls in, my God, how the money rolls in!

My father makes book on the corner.
My mother brews illicit gin.
My sister’s a famous porn actress.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My brother's a medical student.
His scalpels are long, sharp, and thin.
He only knows one operation.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My auntie makes chocolate brownies
And puts marijuana within.
They sell very well on the playground.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My uncle’s a street corner preacher
He saves fallen women from sin.
He'll save you a blonde for ten dollars.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My grandpa sells cheap prophylactics,
He punctures each one with a pin
‘Cause grandma gets rich from abortions.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My daughter works as a dancer.
She shows quite a lot of her skin,
Collecting big tips from the patrons.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My wife is the family chemist.
A role she fits naturally in.
She’s now cooking Meth in the kitchen.
(was: She makes LSD in the kitchen)
My God, how the money rolls in!

My son is an amateur printer.
The press is downstairs in the bin.
Our counterfeit’s widely accepted.
My God, how the money rolls in!

Myself, I run a bordello.
Each night when the evening grows dim,
I hang a red light in the window.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My mother-in-law’s an accountant.
We keep her head in a spin,
Investing all of our income.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My father-in-law is a banker,
A very important linchpin,
He launders all of our paper.
My God, how the money rolls in!

My cousin’s the District Attorney,
Elected to crack down on sin.
So now we’ve got no competition.
My God, how the money rolls in!

When I think about how we’ve succeeded,
It brings to my face a big grin.
By working at so many rackets,
My God, how the money rolls in!

I’m glad to tell you our story,
And introduce some of my kin.
With the family all working together,
My God, how the money rolls in!

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Lighter
Date: 04 Jul 23 - 09:02 PM

Quite a family!

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,MichaelKM
Date: 05 Jul 23 - 03:16 AM

The verses I remember (the family members may be different) are:

My mother has a beat in Piccadilly.
My sister has another in the Strand.
My brother flogs his arsehole round the Elephant And Castle.
Oh Lord, how the money rolls in.

My grandpa's a Harley Street surgeon
With instruments both long and thin.
He only does one operation.
Oh Lord, how the money rolls in,

My uncle's a slum missionary.
He saves fallen women from sin.
He'll save you a blonde for a shilling.
Oh Lord, how the money rolls in.

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 23 - 03:47 AM

For the record, a slight variant:

My grandmother sells contraceptives,
She punctures each one with a pin,
Good job that my brother's a surgeon,
My God...

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: GUEST,MichaelKM
Date: 05 Jul 23 - 07:49 AM

My first verse does not fit the ABCB rhyme scheme and, on reflection, I think it comes from another rhyme:

My mother has a beat in Piccadilly.
My sister has another in the Strand.
My father flogs his arsehole round the Elephant & Castle.
We're the finest f__ing family in the land.

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Joe_F
Date: 05 Jul 23 - 10:28 PM

MichaelKM: Right. That's a different song, with a different tune (a familiar one, but I forget its name) & no chorus. The version I have heard goes

Oh, my name is Diamond Lily,
I'm a whore in Piccadilly,
And my father runs a brothel in the Strand,
And my brother sells his arsehole
To the guards in Windsor Castle --
We're the finest, etc.

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 06 Jul 23 - 04:26 PM

These latest additions sound like variations on:
Little sister Lily is a whore in Piccadilly.
Mother is another, on The Strand . . .

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 06 Jul 23 - 04:33 PM

I had a sister Lily she's whore in Piccadilly
And me mother is another on the Strand
And me father flogs his arsehole in the Elephant and Castle,
Oh we're the cleanest family in the land.
(Tune 'Road to the Isles', Hull 1960s

My father's a lavat'ry cleaner,
he works hard from morning till night,
And when he comes home in the evening,
He's covered all over in...
   Sweet Violets, sweeter than all the roses,
   Covered all over from head to the foot in sweet violets.

(tune to first part 'My Bonny', chorus , own tune)

Subject: RE: ADD Versions: Lord how the money rolls in
From: Lighter
Date: 06 Jul 23 - 07:52 PM

Why should we be pore?
My bruvver 'awks 'is brahn.
Why should we be pore?
My sister walks the town.
Farver's a bit of a tea-leaf,
Muvver's a West-End 'ore,
An' I'm a bit of a ponce meself --
Why should we be pore?

British Army, 1914-18. Tune not indicated.

("Tea-leaf" = thief.)

More "recently":

Australia, 1960s:

Why should we be poor?
Why should we be poor?
Me mum's a bit of a prostitute;
Me dad's a bit of a whore.
Me sister walks the town.
Me brother sells his brown.
And I'm a bit of a fuck meself,
So why should we be poor?