BS: Signs stating the obvious

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Rowan
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 06:59 PM

Sorry, mate.
I'm sure I've got it right sometimes in the past but, while I was brought up to recognise particular gender assignations with different names (Marian/Marion, Vivian/Vivienne, Leigh/Lee, Peter/Peta and Robin/Robyn; to name a few) these have been undermined over the last 30 years and I'm currently surrounded by cross-dressers who've really confused me.

Perhaps I need one of those signs that, to others, might be stating the obvious.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 09:25 AM

BTW, it's spelled "Robin"...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 09:13 AM

... especially since so many ignore them, Rowan.... :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Rowan
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 02:55 AM

I also try to choose a table that gives me a full view of the entrance and my back to a wall if possible.

I found myself doing the same thing, without being aware of it, until I was accompanied by a friend who was into one of the Eastern martial arts. I was leading the way to a table and, when I sat down, he said "Ah! The samurai position!"

But I still choose to sit in such a location.

And, while Robyn is correct about Aussie highway signs, it seems many don't regard the signs as stating the obvious.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 02:41 AM

We have them on our Aussie highways - speed signs... :-P

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Slag
Date: 04 Jun 08 - 01:58 AM

Could be! How about a sign like, oh, say

100!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 11:53 PM

Maybe you were Wild Bill Hickock or Dillinger or someone like that in a previous life, Slag! ;-) ALWAYS sit with your back to the wall and where you can see the whole room. ALWAYS have at least 2 escape routes ready. ALWAYS carry a loaded gun...safety NEVER on!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Slag
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 08:13 PM

I guess they have to do it and sadly for obvious reasons. No matter how lovely the decor of a restaurant there is the big institutional LIT exit sign over the door you just entered by. In addition every other exit is also marked and not only that, every door that is not an exit has a sign over it stating "This Is Not An Exit"!

The first thing I do when I enter a building is look for possible exits. When I use a hotel or motel I always make sure I have at least two sources of egress. I can't remember if I was taught this or figured it out on my own but it's just automatic. Hey, maybe I'm paranoid but I also gage the walls as to the possibility of having to knock a hole in one to get out. Do any of you do this? I also try to choose a table that gives me a full view of the entrance and my back to a wall if possible. I can't sit in a vehicle without fastening the seat belt. To not do so is the same feeling I get as not being in the right seat in the resturant.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 05:28 PM

A sign I see frequently in shops/stores: THIS DOOR TO REMAIN UNLOCKED DURING BUSINESS HOURS.

I can imagine the employees saying, "Duh! So that's why we don't have any customers! We forgot to unlock the front door!"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 05:25 PM

Jim Dixon, you reminded me of a sign I often see:

"WATCH FOR ICE ON BRIDGE"   Same comments applicable as with yours, of course.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 05:12 PM

...

What a great story Chief! I really liked it! I'll be sure to tell that one to my kids the next time they see that sign!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 01:29 PM

That is just plain stupid. No wonder it bugs you.

They should have one at the entrances to Blind River saying, "If you lived here, you'd be FLIPPED!"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Michael
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 01:25 PM

On that paticularly irritates me, and I'm not really sure why, is one on a new housing development on the outskirts of town:
" If You Lived Here You Would Be Home By Now"

Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 01:06 PM

Then there was another restaurant in downtown Toronto that specialized in tropical fruit drinks. They had a sign on the wall extolling the wonders of the Papaya and how good it was for you to drink Papaya juice. The only problem was that there was a picture of a half-sectioned fruit on that same sign, and it was NOT a Papaya, it was a Mango! (there is no resemblance whatsoever between the two fruits, specially when they are half-sectioned)

I finally pointed this artistic error out one day to the owner after having patronized the place for 3 or 4 years. I said, "That's not a Papaya on that sign, it's a Mango."

He was not pleased, and he refused to discuss the matter with me. Some people just can't admit to an error! Their pride is involved. ;-) So...the sign is probably there to this day, raving on about Papayas while exhibiting a half-sectioned Mango.

It's kind of sad, I think. But it's amusing too.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 12:48 PM

There was a restaurant in downtown Toronto which proudly displayed a sign in its front windows which faced the sidewalk. The sign said "IT'S COOOL INSIDE!" and it was decorated with artwork depicting icycles and little beads of coldness all around the words "IT'S COOOL INSIDE!". You were supposed to feel quite cool immediately just by looking at that sign.

They were referring to their powerful air conditioning system. It was their idea that on hot summer days perspiring people who were proceeding down the sweltering sidewalks of Toronto would see the sign and experience an irresistible urge to rush into their restaurant to escape the heat and order a bunch of food and drinks.

Well, I guess it worked okay in the summer.

The problem was, they never took the damn sign down...and our winter seems to last FOREVER here...whereas summer is a brief respite from the cold weather blues.

Time after time I would trudge by that place on some viciously cold day in January or February...the kind of day when your boots squeak on the pavement and dogs dare not pee on hydrants for fear of getting frozen in the act...and what would I see when I passed that restaurant?

That damned frikkin' sign telling me "IT'S COOOL INSIDE!"

Boy, did I ever start to hate that sign after awhile.



This was an okay concept except for one thing.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 07:08 AM

Strange thing, Jim, but I was about to mention a similar one on a road I used to work near. In that case, it was one of the mobile hazard warning signs like ones used for roadworks, which warned of ice in the middle of the Summer. It was a drainage ditch with a small stream running under the road, which flooded in heavy rain and iced the road in winter.
We tended to just return the sign to the Highways Department when the weater got hot.

As for fixed road signs, they say things such as "Scunthorpe welcomes careful drivers" I keep watching for the one saying "If you drive like a nutter - go to Hull"...

Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 06:46 AM

Not far from here is a sign that used to say "WARNING - ICE ON ROAD." Now, it's true, that spot gets icy in winter—water seeps out of the nearby hillside, runs onto the road, and freezes—but the problem with the sign was that they left it up year round. The sign must have seemed stupid to people who saw it in summer. So they changed it to "WARNING – WATER OR ICE ON ROAD." Now THAT sign seems stupid in a different way. When the road is merely wet, it isn't particularly hazardous, so no warning is needed. Also, the road doesn't get wet in the summer—except when it rains—because there is a culvert that does a good job of carrying away the excess water in the summer. It's only in the winter when the culvert gets clogged with ice and snow, that water runs onto the road and creates a problem. So I'm waiting for the next version of the sign.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Michael
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 06:10 AM

Colonic irrigarion eh Micca?

Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Micca
Date: 03 Jun 08 - 04:29 AM

I am not ssure if this fits this category or not, but,
several years ago now in our local DIY store there were rain barrels for sale and a special adapter for fitting to the down pipe from the roof to collect rainwater, this adapter proclaimed in large letters,

"With this adapter you can direct the rain water directly into your butt"..

"the automatic overflow device then allows excess to run to drai"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: meself
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 11:16 PM

Saw a bumper sticker on the back of a big truck one time - I could hardly approve of it, but I did have to laugh: "If you don't like my driving, phone 1-800-EAT-SHIT".

I suppose it falls into the 'statement of the obvious' category ...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Slag
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 11:06 PM

I remember my brother and I as small children, being disappointed whenever we saw the "Watch for Falling Rock" signs. We'd strain our eyeballs but never saw one. Rats!

There was a bumper sticker popular a few years back that stated, in rather small print, "If you can read this, YOU'RE FOLLOWING TOO DAMN CLOSE!"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 10:00 PM

I saw the following message painted above the fuel tank of a sleeper-equipped long-haul semi tractor (lorry to you UK types): "This is a team driven truck. Check bunk before leaving terminal."

I can imagine a driver tooling down the highway and having one of the drivers from the rig's previous shift come bounding out of the bunk asking, "Hey, George, aren't we in Topeka yet? Wait a minute... You're not George! And this looks a helluva lot like St. Louis!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 08:28 PM

Warning: Thread Drift

Many moons ago in the state of Pennsylvania a young brave quarrelled with his father who was the Chief of the tribe. It was such a terrible argument that the young brave ran away from the tribe. As the years passed the Chief began to understand that it was just the way of young men to argue with their elders and that the argument had been over something petty and meaningless. He grew to miss his son very badly and wanted him to return. The tribe searched and searched but could find no trace of him at all. To make matters worse the Chief was stricken with a strange malady which stole his strength. He feared that he might pass on and with no other heir the tribe would have no new Chief to guide them. And so he petitioned the good folks of Pennsylvania to help him find his son. They responded with sympathy and kindness and promised to do all they could to help find him. So the next time you pass through Pennsylvania please Watch for "Falling Rock" and let him know how much he is loved and that his father and tribe want him to return.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Rowan
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 08:25 PM

In Australia, we have a Hanging Rock.

Robyn, we have at least two. But the one famous for its Picnic is my favourite. Whenever I took my class climbing there the sign at the turnoff from the highway invariably had a fist-sized pebble hanging from it on a piece of string.

And I too have always enjoyed the

       FALLING
         ROCKS
       DO NOT
         STOP

of JennieG fame.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Arnie
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 12:58 PM

Since starting this thread I think I'm becoming obsessed about these 'obvious' signs. I've just left a garden centre that had a sign over the exit door stating 'Drive home carefully'. Good job I read it before leaving otherwise I'd have driven home in a dangerous manner and no doubt would have had an accident. I never used to notice these signs before and wonder if it's a 'sign' of me getting older and more cynical?

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: eddie1
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 12:15 PM

I did once post this in another thread, long ago and far away.
For years I had a photo, on the notice board in my office, taken in Edinburgh Zoo. On one post were two signs. The first said, "Gentlemen", the second, "Exhibition area under re-development."

Eddie

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: GUEST,Neil D
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 12:12 PM

When we see a sign that says SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY my wife inevitably says "They'll speed up if you bear down on them".

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 11:18 AM

Ranger Steve, as to "falling rock", remember that "rock" may refer to a material, or just as well as "a piece of stone". And that a cliff or the sides of a highway cut may repeatedly (or even continually) produce rockfalls.

Of course that's obvious, and tends to spoil the opportunity for a joke.

Just call me
Killjoy Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: open mike
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 10:37 AM

I hung a banner at the entrance of the campground where we held a music camp out. A friend was to come along after me and re-position and secure the sign. I hung it where it could not be reached by the grazing cows in the near by field, as i remembered hearing about cows eating all manner of stuff, including fiberglass insulation off of a water tank (bluck!)
I put a note on the banner saying "keep away from cows" my friend hung it directly on the fence, thinking i had meant for HIM to keep away from the bovine critters.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Peace
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 10:08 AM

A sign of the . . . ?

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 09:18 AM

There is a now obsolete meaning to the word 'Dip' - refering to a guy...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Michael
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 09:06 AM

On a rather switchbacky road:- "Hidden Dip" like an Easteregg hunt only savoury?

Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Mr Happy
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 08:49 AM

'Blind Summit!'

Approaching Macclesfield, used to think was a village name!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Mrrzy
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 08:42 AM

We always liked the pair of signs that said Deaf Child / Blind Driveway!

But that wasn't obvious...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Michael
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 07:26 AM

And then the sign is changed to "Danger men replacing roadsign" and then to "Danger Fallen Rocks"

Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Folk Form # 1
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 06:35 AM

Falling rocks do stop.....eventually.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 02 Jun 08 - 01:03 AM

TURN BACK YOU ARE GOING THE WRONG WAY - this sign has been up for years since a nearby 2-way street was made one way. It was (almost) needed when the road was changed but that was years ago.

sandra

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 09:50 PM

In Australia, we have a Hanging Rock.


I'm not making this up, you know...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 08:31 PM

They don't stop because they have no respect for anyone!

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: JennieG
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 07:56 PM

We have signs in Oz that say:

       FALLING
         ROCKS
       DO NOT
         STOP

No shit, Sherlock??!!!!

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Bill Hahn//\\
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 07:44 PM

I love the one I saw recently at a shopping center----Speed Limit 5 MPH and below it---DO NOT ENTER Better safe than sorry.

Bill Hahn

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: RangerSteve
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 07:39 PM

My problem with the "Falling Rock" sign is that it says "Falling Rock". Just one. And the sign implies that it is falling right now, as you are reading the sign. When no one is around to read the sign, is it still falling? Or is it perpetually falling, in slow mothion, never reaching the ground? I've personally never seen the falling rock. The only time there was a falling rock, and it missed me by about 6 inches, there was no sign.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 07:24 PM

The dread falling rock respects no border, Peace! ;-)

Such rocks will lurk atop a hill, cliff, or escarpment for hours or even days waiting for an unsuspecting motorist. Yes, they wait!... intent on propelling themselves down the slope and crashing into the side or roof of his car, thus causing death and dismemberment. After the vile crime is committed the rock will usually play "possum" and lie there innocently amidst the wreckage cheerfully planning its next act of mayhem...

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Peace
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 06:30 PM

That's 80 km in Canada.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Mo the caller
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 06:29 PM

There seems to be a mania for putting notices by the side of roads. Yes, they have all these clever electronic sign boards on the motorways, but they could just keep them for when they are needed, instead of forcing us to peer round all the lorries to read something that MIGHT be important.
I'm still waiting for one that says KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 06:27 PM

You are supposed to freeze in a moment of stark terror, screech to a halt, look around wildly, then do a hasty three point turn and take an alternative route to your intended destination...even if it requires a 50 mile detour.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Mo the caller
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 06:25 PM

We wonder what we are expected to do about the signs that warn us of a 'weak bridge' or 'falling rocks'.

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 06:02 PM

Just walked down the hallway,
Somebody scrawled below the sign, "Then what is it?"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: pdq
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 04:39 PM

"this post has no content, said Ron, Blankley"

Subject: RE: BS: Signs stating the obvious
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jun 08 - 04:24 PM

Ceci n'est pas un threead, either...