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BS: Dear Bank Manager

John MacKenzie 23 Nov 08 - 05:18 AM
Megan L 23 Nov 08 - 05:22 AM
Gurney 24 Nov 08 - 01:42 AM
EBarnacle 24 Nov 08 - 10:24 PM
JohnInKansas 24 Nov 08 - 11:41 PM
GUEST,Murphy 25 Nov 08 - 08:28 AM
Liz the Squeak 25 Nov 08 - 08:38 AM
Charmion 25 Nov 08 - 03:50 PM
Penny S. 25 Nov 08 - 04:22 PM
Bainbo 25 Nov 08 - 04:54 PM

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Subject: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 23 Nov 08 - 05:18 AM

Dear Sirs
In view of current developments in the banking market,
if one of my cheques is returned marked "insufficient funds",
does that refer to me or to you?
      
Sincerely Yours,

XG


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Megan L
Date: 23 Nov 08 - 05:22 AM

Ya glaikit Gommeral :)


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Gurney
Date: 24 Nov 08 - 01:42 AM

Dear XG,
       It refers to your funds. Currently they are invested in Iceland, and are awaiting repatriation, apart from the portion required to pay bank official's salaries. We confidently expect them to be available shortly.
          Yours Faithfully,
                            A. Pratt-Gauger. (pp the manager.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: EBarnacle
Date: 24 Nov 08 - 10:24 PM

When you owe the bank $10,000, it's your problem. When you owe the bank a Billion dollars, it's their problem.
Can I get a bailout, please?


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 24 Nov 08 - 11:41 PM

A warning in one of my newletters points out that with the banking and credit disaster, and with people worried about jobs, marketing analysts are predicting an enormous influx of "unsophisticated web shoppers."

In a situation where lots of idiots unknowledgeable persons are seeking places to rid themselves of money, the opportunities for scamming are immensely increased, so it is quite safe to assume that there will be many more (even more than usual) opportunities to be "taken," both at existing - usual trustworthy - and on new, built-for-scamming, sites.

While hopefully all our 'cat users are much more sophisticated than the average greedy basta... yuppie, even the normally careful webist may be at somewhat increased risk, just because of the more frequent appearances of persons with evil intent.

Aside from the possible need for extra caution, this may be something of an opportunity for those with less sophisticated friends to pass on some friendly advice, and to watch for evidences of "unsafe activities," and to offer appropriate warnings and useful assistance.

Keep the guard up, because (mostly) all the money that gets ripped off from consumers eventually ends up in the hands of the bankers - one way or another.

John


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: GUEST,Murphy
Date: 25 Nov 08 - 08:28 AM

I went to my bank manager and asked "How do I stand for a loan?". He answered "You don't, you kneel." I asked him to check my balance so he gave me a push.


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 25 Nov 08 - 08:38 AM

And yet, mine has just given me enough money for a new boiler or a really good holiday!

I think it's the new boiler though... unless the holiday is 'somewhere warm for the duration'....

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Charmion
Date: 25 Nov 08 - 03:50 PM

Oh, Liz --

Read that contract again. It's a loan, not a gift!


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Penny S.
Date: 25 Nov 08 - 04:22 PM

I "invested" my pension lump sum according to advice from the Teachers specialists a year and a half ago. I have had a teeny tiny amount of interest, and the value of the capital bond, the unit trust, and the ISA have gone down by a combined £12k. They suggest that when the market is low is the time to invest more. Are they crazy? I know the theory, which is what is making me hold on and not withdraw what is left. But send good money after bad? Not on your nelly.

I think I told the guy I wanted my capital safe.

But in the circumstances, so many people are in the same boat that mis-selling is probably not the issue, and would be taking from others if pursued.

And the Halifax would not have any problem lending me money for a new house based on what I have access to. Even though we can't sell Dad's yet and I might not be able to find a buyer for mine any time soon.

But I want my money back, not other money.

Penny


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Subject: RE: BS: Dear Bank Manager
From: Bainbo
Date: 25 Nov 08 - 04:54 PM

Dear Barclays Bank manager

Although you've never bothered to ask me why I've closed my accounts with you after more than 30 years, I'll tell you anyway. It's nothing to do with your staff, who have always been ready with help and advice. It started when I found out that Barclays was lending money to Mugabe's henchmen, despite a European embargo on supporting that murderous regime.

To add insult to injury, when confronted, Barclays didn't even deny it or try to defend their sanctions-busting. They merely explained the loophole that let them get away with it (they were incorporated in Africa before the embargo). Like that would make us all go: "Whew! Oh, well that's all right, then. No harm done there."

Bastards. Sadly, I can't stop them doing it. But I can stop them doing it with my money.


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