BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library

Subject: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Matthew Edwards
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:19 PM

In a most disturbing development a notorious bibliophile was recently spotted cruising our local Public Information Environment. Shocked citizens called for action by the council as they witnessed this person try to touch and handle volumes of all shapes and sizes, even attempting to remove some for their own private viewing. Officials from the Information Service tried to direct this misguided individual towards the interactive screens and ebooks provided but to no avail. The individual insisted that they wanted to borrow a Basis Of Organised Knowledge, or "book" but a google for this particular practice showed no meaningful results.

After the individual had been removed by officers of the Public Correction brigade a senior councillor warned the public to be vigilant against latent bibliophiliac tendencies:- "Sadly the condition is incurable, and those afflicted by it will spend hours gazing at these so-called 'Bases Of Organised Knowledge', repeatedly touching them with their dirty hands and even fingering the internal parts. Some perpetrators claim to be followers of an obscure sect founded by a certain Ray Bradbury, but most of them are simply addicted to script."

Next week:- A Timely Warning Against Displays of Thespianism

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:28 PM

That's good because my brother is a Thespian (although we don't like to talk about it) and everyone should be warned about him. Actually, everyone should be warned about both my brothers, their offspring, and their offspring's offspring.

I admit to having dabbled in it in my younger days, but a Twelve Step Program helped me overcome it.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:30 PM

Dabbling or Thespianism?

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:38 PM

Dabbling. I can leave Thespianism completely alone. We are trying to get help for my brother, and as a result I really AM my brother's keeper.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Sleepy Rosie
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:43 PM

No need to worry folks, the coming revolution will put paid to all those 'unnatural' intellectual and creative types! Economic crash, social dissaffection, rioting, mass scapegoating... Fahrenheit 451 style bonfires, the works. We've got it all to look forward to.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:00 PM

They won't get my brother! He might be a Thespian, but he's still my brother.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:11 PM

It could be worse. He could be a the.rapist!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:20 PM

Its the pedagogues in public libraries who concern me.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Will Fly
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:29 PM

We librarians must go back to the chained library - chain up every book! That way the buggers can't take them out. And - if we put plate glass in front of the bookcases - they won't even be able to look at them...

Long live the chained library in York Minster! Monks rule! Bring back illuminated manuscripts!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:33 PM

Into the tumbril with the -gogues and -phils!

Mortimer Snerd and Happy Hooligan will prevail!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 02:05 PM

I hope no one catches on about the philatelists haunting the postal facilities!

And it is said that certain auditorially hampered groups have been engaging in public gesticulation!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Will Fly
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 02:30 PM

I once matriculated when I was at school - and I have been known to expectorate. I hope no-one was watching...

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 02:36 PM

I masticate several hundred times per day.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 03:15 PM

Much to my shame I have engaged in both taxonomy and pre-marital osculation. I have also perused the notorious and lascivious AACR2 et seq. (I cannot bring myself to write its title in full, I am so ashamed.)

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 03:37 PM

I have heard that nictitating females are really on the make. Have there been studies? Where's the proof?

In my local record office, I have been warned by staff not to stay at back of the Search Room to file the parish register handlists. Apparently this is where historic (in more than one sense) hooligans (retired archivists) lay in wait to snag unsuspecting staff to demand documents known to be ludicrously difficult to retrieve.

Somebody did it to them once and now they externalise. See how the disease is passed down? Once victims now predators.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Will Fly
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 03:39 PM

I have also perused the notorious and lascivious AACR2 et seq. (I cannot bring myself to write its title in full, I am so ashamed.)

I've also thumbed the pages of this in secret. But - let's "out" ourselves - 'Catters must know us for what we are.

It's the "Anglo-American Cataloguing Rules 2". (Sobs in shame...).

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Wyrd Sister
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 04:02 PM

Where is Thespia?

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 04:08 PM

... what is she, that all our swains commend her?

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 04:20 PM

...and I "know" ISBD(M).

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 04:21 PM

Bring back illuminated manuscripts!

Ha! Chongo will just tell you to flip the flippin' light switch. . .

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 05:22 PM

As a Library Director, I will say (and you may quote me) that this would be a wonderful place to work if it weren't for the staff and the patrons.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: GUEST,Librarian
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 04:06 PM

If one reads while walking they are a Pedobibliophile.
The term has nothing to do with biblical references to underage sex practices.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 04:12 PM

Strictly speaking "a pedophile" should be someone who is unduly fond of feet, with the prefix "paedo" reserved for matters relating to children.

Pointing that out implies that I am writing from a pedantophile perspective.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 04:21 PM

Well, I myself have seen people masticating in the library, though it's usally strictly verboten there.
I've also seen couples interdigitating in the stacks while leering at pictures of tentacles.

I used to be a pedagogue but I'm trying to quit.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: John on the Sunset Coast
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 05:30 PM

Rapaire-I think it thespicable that your sibling wants to engage, as it seems, in such activities.

Those paper thingees with writing on them are only for folks who need a tactile, visual experience.

McGrath, when I was a senior in college (how oxymoronic to be senior at 21 or 22), my major professor in introducing himself said his disdain for pedantry in its worst form. He was the worst purveyor of such behavior.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 05:54 PM

We keep him medicated now and he's usually okay.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 06:32 PM

I will also admit to mictruating in the library's rest rooms.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bill D
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 06:40 PM

Out of curiosity, McGrath, (or others in UK) how do you pronounce "paedophile"

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 07:43 PM

I try to faccinculate when I do my belly dancing, but I haven't mastered it yet.

I have been known to peruse openly whilst in the library.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bob the Postman
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 09:06 PM

I know a chap whose reputation was soiled when it became known that he was a practicing pedologist.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rowan
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 11:19 PM

Woe is me! As a pedagogue I have peddled taxa and all sorts of taxonomic curiosities; even screws couldn't escape my dichotomies. I even did it in the presence of minors!

Sob!

And in Oz, paedophilia is pronounced pretty much as written, especially by those with some pedagogy in their background but particularly so among pedants.

I'll now take my foot out of my mouth.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rowan
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 11:22 PM

I know a chap whose reputation was soiled when it became known that he was a practicing pedologist.

ANother that's really cute, Bob.

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: GUEST,Peace
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:41 AM

"paedophile"

Work with me on this Bill:

pay-DOFF-ill--ee

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 02:58 AM

I know a man whose wife was into animal husbandry. Not sure if that's legal everywhere.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 03:04 AM

It is my honest opinion that all Bibliophiles, caught acting out their wicked ways in Public Libraries, should have their Appendixes removed!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Paul Burke
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 03:18 AM

I know a chap whose reputation was soiled when it became known that he was a practicing pedologist.


Don't laugh- after a child murder in the UK, a mob attacked the house of a paediatrician.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 09:18 AM

The correct term is "appendices" (ap PEN da cees) and not the gauche word "appendixes". Appendices are appended to the tome, whether it be folio or sexagesimo-quarto.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 09:29 AM

I knew there was some dirty business afoot:

pedology:
The sub-discipline of soil science that: studies soils as a component of natural systems or deals with soil genesis and soil classification or studies the soil profile or solum in its natural setting.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: quokka
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 09:45 AM

I think Thespia may be next to Lesbos...only there's a bit of a stoush between the different sects of the latter regarding who exactly is entitled to the title...we may yet see the same with Thespians

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 11:46 AM

I was aware of that Rapaire but somehow the post felt better using appendixes....... just sounded sense to the double meaning.. Best wishes, Mike.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:09 PM

I understand that some of the Christian right-wingers are picketing local libraries for having eschatological books!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:43 PM

We might also have an abecadery or two.

And don't get me started on "indexes"!

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:39 PM

'...how do you pronounce "paedophile" '

I'd say the "paed" to rhyme with "weed", but I've often heard it pronounced to rhyme with "fed". (Oxford Dictionary backs my pronunciation.)

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:44 PM

RIght, Kevin--it's as plain as the nose on your face that "p-a-e" spells "pee".



A

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:47 PM

Rapaire you mean indices surely??? LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rowan
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:52 PM

pedology:
The sub-discipline of soil science that: studies soils as a component of natural systems or deals with soil genesis and soil classification or studies the soil profile or solum in its natural setting.

And some soil profiles are known to exhibit peds and cutans.
Perhaps our pedologist had feet of clay?

PS While The correct term is "appendices" (ap PEN da cees) may be correct in the US, where I come from it's pronounced "ap PEN di cees". While on such indices of geographic variation, "Kleenex" is a popular brand of tissues in Oz and I often hear people ask for a box of Kleenices. And I'll leave it right there before I get into "datum for one and data for more", because I might be tempted into discussions on the relative merits of "fewer items of interest" vs "less items of interest".

Ruddy pedants!

Cheers, Rowan

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:53 PM

Yes, but I didn't want to start on IN-da-cees.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 05:15 PM

"pay-DOFF-ill--ee"
hmmm... has possibilities..

"peed-o-file"
..feels awkward to my American ears...but..*shrug*

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 05:23 PM

Well, people I know in the dentistry field refer casually to a "pedodontics" practice as "pee-doh" and they generally say "PEE-do-DON-tics," not "PED-o-DON-tics."

But I wonder if you could get arrested for looking at pedodontic pictures in the library or posting them on the internet.

Subject: RE: BS: Warning: Bibliophiles in Public Library
From: Genie
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 05:28 PM

Oh, and by the way, I've heard there are some Anglophiles and Francophiles hanging around our American libraries too!