BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr

Subject: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:19 PM

Ever notice how your nail clippers quickly get dull on the side you find most easy and natural to use? So then you gotta hold them in the most awkward, bass-ackwards way because they're only sharp on the wrong side. Argh! The question is, do you turn the damn things upside down or use them in the wrong hand?

Have you run into this problem too, Bobert? If so, complain here.

I started this thread primarily to see if I can draw Catspaw forth out of his lair with some rude commentary. ;-)

Let's see if it works......

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:32 PM

Nah, he's getting old and past it now, the younger fellas are jostling for his position.
He's a spent force, why even today he imagined he was living in Budapest.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: fat B****rd
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:34 PM

I'm pleased if I can reach my feet to use nail clippers.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:35 PM

Buy a whack of em with your company name on them and charge it to the advertising budget. You get em close to wholesale, you claim them on the income tax, you get the advertising, and you get rid of the aggravation.

Or, you could slpurge and blow 7 or 8 bucks for good clippers every few years.

Maybe Spaw could give you some suggestions as to what to do with your old clippers?

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:36 PM

Oh, I'm sure he could.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 03:53 PM

Oh whoopee..........Now we're going to do copycat observational humor! Like, "Have you ever noticed how so many fuckwits pretend they're George Carlin?"   Carlin's dead.......Go for it.

I can hardly wait to see what comes next!   Hmmmm.......



*****Have you ever noticed that it feels better to scratch your balls with the back of your fingernails on a downstroke as you can scratch better with less chance for injury?

*****Have you ever noticed how using one of the removable wand type shower heads can make hosing out the crack of your ass a lot more efficient?

*****The fact that the entire world is clearly and completely full of shit explains why it is so difficult to find Shinola although Kiwi is generally available.

*****Ever notice that Hawk is a broke-dick Jagov who ain't got the ability or brains to expel urine from high-top footwear?



We can fill the forum with all sorts of great stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!


Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Bert
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 04:54 PM

Sharpen 'em ya silly bugger!

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Gurney
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 05:04 PM

Sidecutters work well, and since they are made for wire, they can even cope with 'Spaw's toenails.

How do I know? I don't know. I'm just guessing he experiences bodily changes like the rest of us.

LH, a real man would trim his toenails with a bayonet.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Ebbie
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 05:47 PM

Trimming nails with a bayonet: Line up toe (be certain you know where toe is). Raise bayonet high. Lunge.

Works a treat.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 05:49 PM

When I asked for a tow, that's not what I meant Ebbie

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 05:53 PM

I thought fingernails. Don't youse all get pedicures for you nether regions?

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 06:18 PM

Don't try to teach your grandmother how to cheat at bingo, guys...

I use nailclippers sometimes for my fingernails, and they're also very handy for clipping certain of the smaller model kit parts off the sprue.

But when it comes to toenails, here's the best way.

1. Take a hot bath first. This will soften the toenails.

2. Immediately after finishing said bath, use the small scissors on a Swiss army knife to clip your toenails. They will cut very easily and smoothly, having been pre-softened in the bath.

Spaw - Thanks, buddy. I knew I could count on you.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 06:28 PM

Or just buy the sort of Christmas crackers that have decent gifts inside them. There's always a set of clippers in there. I buy crackers cheaply in the New Year sales and put them aside for the next Christmas.

Haven't actually bought any nail clippers for about 8 years now.

But if I ever catch the bugger who sits in our front room and picks their toenails and doesn't pick up the clippings, I'll make so he never needs to trim his toenails again!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 07:51 PM

When I used to frequent the Unofficial Martin Guitar Forum (before concluding that it exists largely as a place for retired doctors and lawyers to show off their expensive new acquisitions) someone actually started a genuine, for real, non-BS thread about the relative merits of various fingernail clippers. I was stunned to learn that after over 40 years of playing guitar I'd been doing my playing a tremendous disservice by using cheap-ass Trim brand clippers available from damned near anyplace instead of spending $30.00+ for professional manicurists' tools.

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: Bobert
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 07:51 PM

First of all, I never cheat at Bingo...

Now as fir nail-clippers??? I don't use 'um 'cause they give me the creeps... I gotta a rounded sizzors that works real good when ya' follow it with a little fine tuning from an emory board...

Toe nails is a differenter story... I use toe nail clippers and, yeah, it sucks when they get dull... I gotta a colletcion of dull toe nail clippers that I might auction off for Mudville...

Who'll give be a dollar???

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: MaineDog
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 08:04 PM

Little Hawk's advice is excellent. The use of a dull nail clipper on a dry toenail will produce a painful concussion when the nail snaps. This pain may persist for several days, and is clearly not good for you. For me, I prefer to use a 3/4" bevel edged chisel which I keep razor sharp for many uses around the house/shop. However, lately, I am finding it difficult, and unsafe, to do my toenails this way. Guess I'll have to go on a diet.
MD

Subject: RE: BS: Dull nail clippers...Grrrrrr
From: kendall
Date: 10 Jan 09 - 08:15 PM

Sprue. Now there's a word I haven't heard since I gave up my muzzel loader.