How do you survive the day job?

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: GUEST,CupOfTea, no cookies
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:50 PM

This summer I finished working at what had been the "job of my dreams" - I was in charge of a creative camp. It was what I trained for as an art teacher, it used all my skills, but ultimately it also sucked all my energy. I was insane enough to give up a chance at full time employment to eke out a living doing this job I loved. Eventually, the stress got to me.

So, at 53, I had my first full time job-with-benefits working for someone else since 1976. I'm not doing anything I went to college or grad school for - I work in a church rectory office that could be the basis of a sitcom (only then they'd have to kill me). BUT I love going to work - not necessarily what I DO, but the atmosphere is great. I work with one of my best friends who shares a similar sense of humor, and the music we play all day is trad folk. I introduce him to singers and he introduces me to dance music of different places. We plot English Country Dances. We laugh alot at the quirks of people we deal with. We laugh at ourselves. I'm making more music than ever now that I'm not agonizing over money and responsibities. When I walk out the door of work, I'm free to live my life. Before, "work" was everywhere around me. Wish I'd done this (and lots of other stuff) 20 years ago.

Joanne in Cleveland

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Cool Beans
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:31 PM

In the words of grumpy newspaper editor Lou Grant (old American TV show): "That's why they call it work." And in the words of my late mother: "Stuck is stuck." This may not make you feel any better, but know you have lots of company.

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: artbrooks
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:30 PM

A friend of mine had what I thought was a good answer: "I work 8 hours a day so I have the money to support myself and enjoy the other 16 hours". If you really hate it, try to find something else to do. If it is something you do to put food on the table and clothes on your back, and you are at least neutral about the work, your coworkers and your surroundings, than you are probably a step ahead of most of the rest of humanity.

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Peace
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:23 PM

Good one, Steve. I no longer 'take work home with me' unless it's something I want to take home with me. I'm paid x dollars for y hours. I give the required hours willingly. After that, NO WAY, unless it's something I want to do. The days of loyalty to an employer are gone in most jobs. Companies are generally interested in profits and not staff. The one I work for could give a rat's ass whether I die or not. I feel much the same about my employer. There is no longer any loyalty. If you show none to the worker, there's no reason the worker should show loyalty back. IMO, it's that simple.

(There may be people here who work for a wonderful employer--and if their are, ignore what I said. For most of us, however, that's not the case.)

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: oggie
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:15 PM

I'm self employed so I still work for the bank manager :)

My Uncle (who suffered work related stress) came up with what I think is the best answer "My employer pays me for x hours a week, I owe them that time at the best of my ability but no more, they are not paying me for more. The rest of the time is mine to do with what I want. I want to do so much and I will do so much more and I will live a life."

Steve

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Peace
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 06:12 PM

Let folks think whatever they damned well please. It's a job. You don't have to like it, you just have to do it. I can relate to the situation. I'm in a job I hate. But it's a job I have to do. When I no longer need it, well, don't get between me and the door or you'll have footprints on your back. If possible, see a job counsellor. That would be a big help to you, I think. Best wishes to you, Jane.

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Jane of 'ull
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:56 PM

Thanks for your help Kat, I will try that test.

I generally get on with men at work more than women - probably because I'm not very girly, in the sense that I've got a bloke's sense of humour and I'm into music and books and not much into things like make-up, relationships and shopping - and the type of organisations I work in tend to attract rather mumsy, girly women I suppose. Trouble is if you chat to the blokes more often, people think you're flirting!

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:34 PM

Just full of empathy, aren't you, Richard?

Jane, my brother has the same problem and no answers. He is self-compelled to compose his music regardless, usually before he goes to work. He gets really angry and upset if he doesn't work on his music and he gets the same way about having to work. Problem is, his attitude at work could get him fired.

Have you thought of job counselling? When I didn't know what kind of work I wanted to do, I went to the job centre, also in a small town, and took an assessment of skills, talents, likes and dislikes test, the results of which helped me narrow it down to two jobs, one of which I took and loved.

Good luck,

kat

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: frogprince
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:33 PM

Quite a few people actually get into work that they enjoy. Some of them run around preaching to the effect that you should never stay in a job you don't enjoy; some of them could use a dose of reality. I planned to go into a field that I at least expected to find satisfying. I wound up inspecting lots and lots of circuit boards, and lots and lots of automotive electrical connectors. I did get quite a bit of enjoyment from interaction with co-workers, but precious little from the job itself.

Jane, please don't take this as a slam; I do feel empathy for you as to frustration. But, how many of your co-workers are edgy because they feel just as frustrated? How many of them see you as one of "the usual boring, small minded, bitchy people that you always find in offices."

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Will Fly
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:27 PM

Playing music was, for a short time, my "day" job, i.e. the main source of income. I gave it up to become what is termed "semi-pro" because, in the end, the full-time musical activity was killing the love of music. This activity included travelling everywhere to play, setting up, waiting around to play, playing, breaking everything down and then travelling home. Playing the same stuff night after night - and just making a living.

So I got a day job - which I've thoroughly enjoyed and will be retiring from in 6 months - while playing locally just a few evenings a month (and being paid). Best of both worlds, I suppose.

But never let the boredom of the day discourage you from playing for recreation and relaxation when the day is done. In the end, if your full-time job pisses you off, think seriously about doing something else. A lifetime hating your environment for 8 hours a day is no life - you'll have thrown it away in hate. :-)

Subject: RE: How do you survive the day job?
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:11 PM

My bank manager insists. Where did you get the idea that work should be enjoyable?

Subject: How do you survive the day job?
From: Jane of 'ull
Date: 05 Mar 09 - 05:09 PM

Like too many people, I hate my job.. I live in a city of small opportunity so have ended up in low paid clerical work. I've taken up temping this last year or so to try and find somewhere I don't mind working, but unfortunately I find myself working alongside the usual boring, small minded, bitchy people that you always find in offices. It drives me mad! How do other people cope? I sometimes get so pissed off that I don't want to pick up my instrument, I can't seem to switch off when I get home. :(