BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Art Thieme
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 09:37 PM

gnu,
I suspect my problem was caused by the ten years I spent playing music on the Mississippi River. All that sun adds up they say.

And I agree about the humor. It gets me by most of the time. But I've come to realize that often Mudcatters don't see my humor easily---or they just get pissed off.
But for escaping from the down times of our situations here, it's rather indispensable. --------- On we go-----------until we don't.

Art

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 05:07 PM

Sort of, ear today, gone tomorrow Art? ☺☻

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 04:42 PM

Sorry to hear that Art. Skin cancer? Too much sun?

With my slice and dices, partial parotidectomey on the right, full on the left, I have developed stories... too much milk and cheese and such doesn't sound very macho. Now, the chainsaw story is good. The hockey stick story is okay in the right crowd.

Perhaps your's could be, "It was either the pack of pit bulls or me." Or about the night you kicked Mike Tyson's ass.

Just funnin. I find humour, even inane humour, such as this thread is a daily requirement for sanity. Whatever floats yer boat eh?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Art Thieme
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 04:31 PM

I had two thirds of my right ear removed recently -- because of cancer. Sort of a "lobotomy" of sorts you might say.

I guess I do recommend it. It'll straighten out your ears nicely.

Art

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 02:25 PM

Well put, John. >;-)

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 12:14 PM

It was hard enough to get someone to take over the payments for the last one, I believe :)

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 10:30 AM

MMFFTT... mmfftt... mmfftt

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 08:52 AM

gnu,
You need a wife. She could solve so many problems for you. And by creating a few she could distract you from your woes.
SINS, ducking for cover

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 08:30 AM

That's a canal, and not the one in his ear either

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Hrothgar
Date: 21 Sep 10 - 07:52 AM

Looks a bit eerie, does it?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 20 Sep 10 - 09:56 AM

Gnu, maybe you need to adopt the software designer's credo:

"That's not a bug, that's a FEATURE!"

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 20 Sep 10 - 08:47 AM

A week ago I had a "pro" trim my stache (free of charge when I took Mum to her salon). THAT'S gonna take four weeks to look halfway normal again.

But, I don't have to look at it.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Sep 10 - 08:36 AM

And next time, let a professional do it.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Charmion
Date: 20 Sep 10 - 08:34 AM

There is absolutely nothing about a bad haircut that three weeks can't fix. In gnu's case, four.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 20 Sep 10 - 07:59 AM

Can you just imagine, g the Donald Trump lookalike?

☺☻

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 11:07 PM

Oh for heaven's sake! Wear a hat until your hair grows in. AND NO COMB OVER!
LOL

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 10:48 PM

After three bus trips to the optometrist over glasses that just didn't feel right, my sister was finally helped by the head guy, who stomped out, announced that one of her ears was 1/4-inch lower than the other, and why couldn't the assistants figure that out?

When I heard her story, I realized that my ears are the same. The next time I got glasses, I asked the assistant to adjust them for ears which don't match, and I got the first comfortable glasses I have ever had in my life.

My point, gnu, is that your ears may never have matched exactly, but you never thought much about them until the operation.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: open mike
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 09:50 PM

National Odd Shoe Exchange initials spell NOSE

don't you think they should have had it spell out Foot?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Bill D
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 08:46 PM

Yeah! You can call it SINSABOUTVERSE!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 08:42 PM

Go for it SINS!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 08:38 PM

gnu,
I am not sure if we ever posted pictures. Barry Finn's daughter once trimmed his hair for him. When she was done he looked like Mo of the Three Stooges or a medieval monk. Shaved straight around above his ears. He took a lot of ribbing but didn't seem to care. LOL Poor Barry.
Glad you enjoyed my bit of doggerel. I am thinking of compiling a diary of my life in verse and inflicting an installment on Mudcat once a week. Unique idea, no?
SINS, being bad

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Beer
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 08:29 PM

Good picture of Gnu Bill D

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 04:58 PM

BTW... I really don't care about it. It just seemed like a good idea for a silly thread. I mean, none of youse can see me ears anyway. Unless I post a pic. And I shant for such a silly purpose. Just reading SINS' last post was worth it.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 04:44 PM

Well-done, Sins!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Bill D
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:50 PM

Happy Gnu ears

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:34 PM

Love it SINS!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:17 PM

There once was a gnu from New Brunswick
Who tried to make sense of his cow lick.
The cowlick was tamed
But much to his shame
His ears showed alarmingly asymmetric.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:06 PM

What to do when you see in the mirror that you have lopsided ears?

Stop looking in mirrors.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Melissa
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 02:39 PM

I thought that I had wavy hair
Until I shaved. Instead,
I find that I have straight hair
And a very wavy head.

Sheldon Allan Silverstein

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 02:35 PM

There was a young girl from Devizes
Her breasts were of different sizes
One was so small,
It was no use at all,
While the other was large, and won prizes

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 02:19 PM

BWL... "It's almost unheard of for a woman to have perfectly symmetrical natural breasts."

I do not care.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 02:12 PM

Saw the title of this thread and knew instantly who had started it.
In the 60s, that lopsided cut was high fashion but our ears mathched. Liza Minelli had gone far with the lopsided look. Maybe you should contact her. Meantime, you need a diversion. I recommend shaving off an eyebrow. If it is on the same side as your lower ear it will confirm the illusion of a list to starboard. On the other side it will balance out the unevenness and make you look straight. Odd but straight.


BWL - How do you know that about most men's testicles?How do you spend your spare time?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 11:36 AM

For some the difference in foot size is such that they have to buy 2 pairs of the same shoe. What can be done with the odd shoes?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Ebbie
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 11:14 AM

Actually, beedub, I have never understood why the two halves of the head are so different from each other. I have been told, Well, why would they be the same? Which to me is begging the question- why wouldn't they be the same?

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 10:46 AM

Actually, we humans aren't as symmetrical as we think. Our legs and arms are of slightly different lengths. Most people's dominant side feet and hands are slightly larger than their mates. (A ring that fits my left hand is too small for my right hand.) It's almost unheard of for a woman to have perfectly symmetrical natural breasts. Most men have one testicle that dangles a bit lower than its mate. And the two sides of our faces are so different that photographs created using mirror-image substitution come out looking like two entirely different people. So why worry about slightly lopsided ears? They're just par for the course.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 07:51 AM

Do what Chongo does about stuff like that. Take pride in your uniqueness. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 04:53 AM

Have your specs adjusted, so they sit straight

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:12 AM

given that the title of the thread implies that the clippers made your ears lopsided, I could say get rid of the clippers

or your could create a diversion

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 03:02 AM

gauge it

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Gurney
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 12:41 AM

One earring. It'll be odd anyway.
Downside is that you'll be greeted "Hello, sailor!"

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Ebbie
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 12:27 AM

Hmmmmmm. There is one more alternative: Live with it. :)

I know a woman who has the oddest looking feet I have ever seen on anyone outside a hobbit. She wears sandals.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Sep 10 - 12:23 AM

Get a tasteful, creative, expressive tattoo and no one will even see your ears!:-)

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Beer
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 10:18 PM

Go dance as a male stripper. No one will notice your ears.
ad.

on second thoughts!!!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 09:52 PM

Catch syphilis and let it go untreated. Nobody will even notice your lopsided ears after your nose rots off.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Melissa
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 09:30 PM

Not just handsome and popular, gnu..you could be a youtube sensation!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Bill D
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 09:16 PM

"...if I could breathe thru one..."

...ummmm... watch Olympic long-distance swimmers

Ears? I guess it's plastic surgery for you!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 08:02 PM

Three ears? Only if I could breathe thru one. Handsome AND popular!

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 07:55 PM

Dreads... now, that sounds cool. If I could get some of that Alaskan weed and some Dreads I could do some of that Raggin music and chill on the slainte.

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: Melissa
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 07:52 PM

if you're worried about people staring (they'd probably be too enchanted by that coy smile to turn away) the easiest thing would probably be to grow another ear.
If you have three ears, that ought to distract folks from noticing your mismatched set.

They'll be consumed with envy and admiration.
I'm starting to get a little bit envious just picturing it..

Subject: RE: BS: #2 hair clippers... my ears are lopsided
From: gnu
Date: 18 Sep 10 - 07:51 PM

Ebbie... ahhh... youse in Alaska can grow yer own weed, eh? On accounta that seems uniquely twisted.