BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton

Subject: BS: 10 camels for Obama+20 chickens for Clinton
From: Sawzaw
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 07:34 AM

10 camels for Obama and 20 chickens for Clinton.

Al Qaeda Offshoot Offers Camels for Obama's Head, Hens for Hillary Clinton's

The al Qaeda affiliate in Somalia has mocked the new $33 million bounty on its top leaders heads by offering its own bounty for President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton – 10 camels for Obama and 20 chickens for Clinton.

"Anyone who helps the Mujahideen find the whereabouts of Obama and Hillary Clinton will be rewarded with 10 Camels to the information leading to Obama and 10 hens and 10 cocks for Hillary," said senior Shabaab commander Fuad Mohamed Khalaf in a statement reported on numerous websites.

Earlier this week, the U.S. offered a total of $33 million through the State Department's Rewards for Justice program for information leading to the capture of seven different Shabaab leaders, including Khalaf.

The U.S. offered $7 million for founder and commander Ahmed Abdi Aw-Mohamed, AKA Godane or Mukhtar Abu Zubeir, five million for Khalaf and three other men, and $3 million apiece for two other leaders.

The announcement of the U.S. bounties came as Somali and other African military forces have begun to squeeze Shabaab into a smaller and smaller section of Somalia. In a statement, the Somali government said the rewards would help crush the al Qaeda affiliate.

"The announcement from the U.S. government . . . will certainly help the Somali government's efforts to end al Qaeda's reign of terror in Somalia," said Somalia's transitional government in a statement Thursday. "This is an important juncture in Somali history, where the possibility of full recovery from years of chaos is within reach."

In his response to the U.S. rewards, Khalaf said that "infidels" offering bounties for Muslims was "nothing new."

"There is nothing new in the fact that infidels pay to have Muslim leaders killed," said Khalaf. "They already did that by offering camels for the head of Prophet Mohammed, and the dollar is the camel of today."

Khalaf was referencing a passage in the Koran in which 100 camels were offered for the Prophet Mohammed as he fled Mecca for Medina.

"I can assure you that these kind of things will never dissuade us from continuing the holy war against them," said Khalaf.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 07:27 PM

Are they offering a bounty on Shane?

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: meself
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 07:48 PM

Al Qaeda developing a sense of humour?! There may be hope for the human race yet.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: meself
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 07:49 PM

Wait - they ARE joking, aren't they?

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: gnu
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 08:21 PM

Hell yeah me... the REPs would would take that offer in a heartbeat and throw in extra hot wings.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 10:00 PM

I'm delighted to see that Al Qaeda has developed a satirical sense of humor about the ridiculous situation the USA has gotten itself into by inventing an endless war with an undefinable enemy who can be magically relocated basically anywhere that the USA wants to intervene for other reasons...like oil or geopolitical control or lucrative corporate "reconstruction" contracts.

But will 10 hens...and more importantly, 10 cocks be enough to meet the demands of Mrs Clinton's personal honor?

I doubt they'd even offer an emaciated Guinea Hen for Shane...

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 10:28 PM

My little brother had a reward on his head during the Vietnam war. The North Vietnamese Army put it there.

I told him I was going to turn him in for the reward, even though the war was long over. I suspected that it hadn't been rescinded.

He replied, "Hell, I'll buy you the five pounds of rice."

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Sawzaw
Date: 10 Jun 12 - 11:20 PM

Personally I think Obama is worth a hell of a lot more than 10 camels.

Hillary???????????? I will have to think on that one.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 12 - 09:37 AM

It depends on how well-trained the camels are. It takes some time to train a good riding camel, you know.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Mrrzy
Date: 11 Jun 12 - 01:00 PM

One would only need one cock - offering 10 is like a white elephant, they will just kill each other anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Mrrzy
Date: 11 Jun 12 - 01:12 PM

Also, when I first read the thread title, I thought it was about what Obama and Bill Clinton would get when they got to moslem heaven... 10 camels for the African and twenty chicks only for Bill, he doesn't get 78 and they aren't necessarily virgins!

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 12 - 02:08 PM

If Bill has any sense, he'd prefer the more experienced chicks anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 12 Jun 12 - 11:56 AM

I thought it was about cigarettes and chewing gum

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Mrrzy
Date: 12 Jun 12 - 12:03 PM

I have to say, though, if the terrorists get a sense of humor, we are all lost.
This does remind me of something that happened at the Reason Rally - there was a sign with a little girl in prayer with the line Where's My Fucking Pony?!? below it, and some Iranians in the crowd asked me, what is a pony. I told them a small horse and saw them not getting the concept, so I thought about what a little Iranian girl might pray for and not get, and the first thing I thought of was a goat (originally typoed god, take that, freud)... but I was afraid to say it in case it was insulting. I decided to use fine silk as a substitute, as in, where's my fucking silk sari?

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Jun 12 - 12:09 PM

I find the repetition of Al Qaeda propaganda to be repulsive.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 12 Jun 12 - 03:52 PM

if the terrorists get a sense of humor, we are all lost

the IRA had a sense of humour as did the UDA.

Didn't make 'em any nicer.

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Jun 12 - 02:59 PM

What for Romney? A dog on the car roof?

Subject: RE: BS: 10 camels for Obama&20 chix for Clinton
From: Sawzaw
Date: 18 Jun 12 - 10:06 AM

Speaking of camels reminds me of the Abdul, the used camel dealer. He had a used camel lot on the edge of the Sahara.

Hassan the merchant came in one day and said he needed a 6 day camel for a particular trip he was planning out into the desert, 3 days out and 3 days back with no water.

Abdul sold Hassan a guaranteed 6 day camel and the merchant departed.

After 5 days the merchant appeared back at the lot on foot, suffering from exposure, dehydration and very upset with Abdul.

He said the camel dropped dead after 5 days and he had to walk the rest of the way.

Abdul asked him if he bricked the camel before he left. Hassan said no, "what is bricking?". Abdul said no frigging wonder he died. To brick your camel you take him to the watering hole just before you leave and let him drink all the water he will hold.

Then just before he raises his head up out of the water, you clap his balls between two bricks whereupon he inhales and extra days worth of water that he would not otherwise drink.

Hassan said doesn't that hurt a lot? Abdul said just don't let your thumbs get between the bricks.