BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party

Subject: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 08:50 PM

Well, lotta of my friends have been thinkin' that seein' as Doper Obama has sworn off that America is deep shit so...

...we gotta move from deep shit to good shit!!!

Know what I mean??? Of course, you do...

So here's the crux of my platform...

Plank 1: Legalize Pot!!! Screw this decriminalization... What the hell does that mean??? I'll tell you what it means... It mean nothin' at all... Just legalize it, tax it and the deficit will be gone in about, ahhhh, lemmee see??? Hmmmmm??? According to the Wes Ginny Slide Rule about 15 'er 20 minutes...

Plank B: What's all this talk about freedom??? Screw freedom... It doesn't exist... Ya hear??? So we're gonna have a national holiday called "Stoner Day" and everyone in America is gonna have to at least fake smoking some pot... I know that Slick Willie didn't inhale... Okay, you can pull a Slick Willie if you want but ya gotta at least do a good "When Harry Met Sally" stoner act... Got it??? All ya' gotta do is either say, "Dynamite shit, man" or "Pass them Oriole cookies over here, Bubba"....

Plank 4: Drug testing on all elected officials and anyone not possessing THC will first be sent to a re-orientation camp and if a second offense occurs be fired... Sorry, but we told you...

Plank G: Seein' as lotta Mexicans is fucking up a lot of other Mexicans over our dumb laws we're gonna need to address that matter so I am proposing a re-education program for cartel'ers to teach them the important stuff like hanging drywall and tending to the domestic crop...

Plank 12: That's about it...

Vote for me...

B~

p.s. Oh yeah... I almost forgot... Stoners Unite!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Ebbie
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:35 PM

I don't know quite how to act...

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Ebbie
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:35 PM

But I WILL vote for you. :)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:41 PM

You propose the Stoner System for everyone in the US, huh? Cooooool!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:41 PM

Thanks, Eb... I was thinkin' of you for VP... Yeah, I know you ain't no stoner but, hey, we sit around listein' to some ol' "Bad Company" LP's and some weed and you'll get the hang of it... Kinda like ridin' a bicycle...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Sawzaw
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:42 PM

With a platform like that you will have every crybaby in the US voting for you.

You should have your inauguration ball at the Lake Pontchartrain dam.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:44 PM

No, Rap... You need a week of orientation... Okay, maybe two weeks... Okay, lets just lay it out on the table... A month...

No guns, man...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:50 PM

Well, you outlined a Stoner System, didn't you? I'm just trying to get your platform clear in my mind, such as my mind is after the '60s.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:52 PM

Okay, Rap... We'll give yo a pass... But, please... No guns... Ya hear???

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 09:56 PM

You can be my VP.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 10:06 PM

Well, Rap... Lemme see yer pee... You beat mine out and we'll talk... Mine??? I'll guarantee that it's gonna put the THC count over the red line...

It's all comes down to pee...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 10:42 PM

So, Bobertz...you tryin' this gambit again? When you oughta instead be gettin' out the vote fer me? Geez! When are you gonna learn?

You might be surprised to hear that I am in favor of legalizin' pot too...but maybe not quite the same way.

Okay, first things first. I don't smoke pot. I got no interest in doin' so. I smoke cigars, okay? But I got no real objection to folks smokin' pot if they want to, see? It don't hurt me none if they do and it's their own business if they want to, right?

I am in favor of legalizin' pot as follows:

1. De-criminalize growin' and possession.
2. Let people grow it on their own property if they want to and use it how they wish.
3. Let 'em GIVE it to other adults if they want to...but at no charge.
4. Do NOT let anyone market it, cos that is the part that leads to trouble of every sort. Just let 'em grow it for their own private use, that's all. Anyone can easily do that.
5. Don't let any business or corporation market it under any circumstances.
6. Pot has some good medicinal uses. Let people use it for treatin' what it's good for treatin'...at NO charge.
7. You see, Bobertz, if ya remove the MONEY angle from pot, then pot ceases to be a problem, cos the criminals and the corporations won't have nothin' to GAIN from it, see? It's the money angle that causes the problems.

Okay, that took care of yer Plank 1. On to Plank B. B????

"Plank B: What's all this talk about freedom??? Screw freedom... It doesn't exist... Ya hear???"

I sorta get yer point...I think. Freedom is always limited in any organized society. What we gotta do, though, is protect certain basic freedoms like: freedom of choice, freedom of speech, freedom of (and from) religion, equality of species and genders and races, habeus corpus, trial by a jury of yer peers, that kinda thing. It's pretty well all in yer Constitution, but it's bein' took away lately by yer presidents, a bit at a time.

I would restore it to what it once was, and improve on it by extendin' it beyond just humans and to other species as well.

I do not see how havin' a day where everyone has to smoke pot or fake doin' so will help. What for? Should we have a day like that for cigars? I don't think so! It would not be fair to people who don't like cigars, and it would reduce supplies for those who do...and raise prices. Dumb idea! Equally dumb in the case of pot. Yer Plank 2 is a no-go.

Hmm. Plank 4. (What is goin' ON here with the numbers???)

"Plank 4: Drug testing on all elected officials and anyone not possessing THC will first be sent to a re-orientation camp and if a second offense occurs be fired... Sorry, but we told you..."

Now you are movin' into total madman fascism, Bobertz! I am shocked. I knew you was a bit of a dumbass, but I never suspected you was a closet fascist! Get help, okay?

Next. Plank G. (What the? G? Are you drunk or...oh, wait...I'm beginnin' to get the picture here...yer wearin' an illegal smile, aren'tcha?)

"Plank G: Seein' as lotta Mexicans is fucking up a lot of other Mexicans over our dumb laws we're gonna need to address that matter so I am proposing a re-education program for cartel'ers to teach them the important stuff like hanging drywall and tending to the domestic crop..."

Yer now goin' beyond stupid into...megastupid! It's the money that's the problem. I told ya. Illegal drugs equate to massive profiteerin' opportunities for the worst people in society. I seen it durin' Prohibition. I'm seein' it now. You can't stop private use of any drug by makin' it illegal. And you can't stop all the criminals who take advantage of the situation either...unless you set up a total police state everywhere and just ruthlessly kill 'em all. Maybe not even then. Anyway, that ain't a step we wanta take, is it? What people need is jobs, education, hope, medical care, thrivin' communities, healthy social services and infrastructure, a good economy, and freedom to exercise free choice in how they wanta live. The problem ain't Mexicans, okay? The problem is drugs bein' made illegal...and many people livin' in extreme poverty and desperation.

That ain't a simple situation. It ain't go one simple answer.

However, I would start by arrestin' a lotta bankers. Right now. It's them big bankers and Wall Street people that have wrecked the world economy, not ordinary workin' people, but ordinary workin' people everywhere are bein' made to pay the bill. That's wrong! Put the damn bankers on trial, I say, and regulate 'em so hard that it makes their teeth rattle. Nationalize 'em all if necessary. Shut down the Fed. Put money creation back in the hands of the real government. Put paper money back on the gold and silver standard. Pardon the unreal load of debt society is reelin' under, and if necessary start over fresh with a brand new currency that is backed up by gold and silver reserves and/or other precious metals. The present load of debt worldwide CAN'T be paid. It will never be paid. Cancel it all NOW and start fresh with a clean slate.

And I'm just gettin' started here.

You want REAL change? Vote fer me.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 10:57 PM

I ain't votin' for no dumbass monkey...

Yer wrong on everything... Teaching Mez-can druggers to hang drywall er tend plants is smart...

What else???

Oh yeah... Yer a dumb monkey... I know... I seen you up close and you are...

... a dumb ass monkey and ain't on my VP list...

Sorry, if you thought that you could shame me into puttin' yer dumb ass on the ticket then think again...

And while we are on the subject, pee in this cup...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 11:22 PM

Yer such an idiot, Bobertz, that you still can't tell the difference between an ape and a monkey, can ya? I always knew you was a bit slow, but I am detectin' signs of total mental incompetency settin' in. You are either smokin' way too much pot...or not enough. Or did a tree fall on you? Try cuttin' the daily dose in half and see if there's any improvement, okay? If there ain't, try doublin' the daily dose. Call me when ya come to yer senses and decide to put yer vote in the right place: opposite the name of yer local APP candidate.

Lemmee see...in yer district that is...

Lenny the Lemur. Oh, yeah. I remember. Lenny is a good guy, and he ain't a monkey...nor is he an ape. He's a lemur. A Lemur is another kinda primate. Look it up and edjacate yerself a bit fer Chrissake.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 11 Jul 12 - 11:47 PM

So, uh, are you gonna legalize grass, man?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 12:27 AM

Bobert: "...... yer a dumb ass monkey..."

A Democratic monkey????

GfS

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: katlaughing
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 01:06 AM

Vote Bobert for President
"A little pot in every pee...it's a good thing!"

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 08:26 AM

Don't need no Donkey or elephant the Marley Gnat is the proper mascot.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Sawzaw
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 08:49 AM

"Put paper money back on the gold and silver standard."

How?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 08:50 AM

A chimp can be President when he or she can swing from a tree...by his or her own tail.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 09:45 AM

Chongz is 99% tail and about 1% head... And that's with the wind at his back... Dumb monkey...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 11:13 AM

Bobert, I've been to stoner parties and people just kinda sat around staring at the candles or watching the water drip.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 11:25 AM

I don't care for parties like that. Much too busy.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 12:10 PM

I find it's a lot livelier when folks party with liquor.

Sawzaw - Here's the thing about the paper money. You remember the old Silver Certificates? USA dollars were once called silver certificates. It said on each dollar that it was a silver certificate, redeemable therefore in silver coins of or equal to the SAME denomination. That meant that a paper dollar was redeemable at any bank for a silver dollar or 4 silver quarters or 10 silver dimes or any other such combination. That was when the dollar was actually worth somethin', cos it was backed up by a precious metal. Gold was also pegged for a long time at $24 an ounce, which meant that the dollar had a real, stable value, backed up by somethin' real.

Not any more! By about the mid-sixties the USA discontinued mintin' silver coins, replacin' 'em with nonprecious metals like copper and nickel...and the silver certificates were phased out and replaced by Federal Reserve Notes....paper money that is backed up by absolutely NOTHIN' real at all...cos it ain't redeemable in any fixed amount of any real and valuable substance. Therefore it's a mere symbol of a supposed value....kind of like Monopoly money...and the Fed (which is a private corporation) now has control of the money supply of the entire USA. The Fed has supplanted the US Government as the entity which actually creates the money...prints it...or creates it on a digital spreadsheet...and the Fed can create any amount of this phony money that it wants to, because it ain't redeemable in any fixed amount of anything real. It is NOT real money. It has no REAL value, but we all pretend that it does, and that keeps the game goin'...just like a Monopoly game.

That permits the Fed and the other big banks who work hand in glove with the Fed to run what amounts to a giant pyramid scheme with money that they create out of thin air...every time they make a loan to the government or to private industry or to another nation through the World Bank and the IMF. They're loan sharks on a giant scale, and the whole world is in hock to them, and they get rich on the interest AND control the politicians through the power of the debt they have put everyone in.

When the bubble bursts, which happens periodically, they get bailed out and the public everywhere is made to pay for THEIR failed pyramid scheme through taxes, inflation, and payin' down the public debt...which is now so huge that it probably can't ever be paid down.

This is graft on an almost unimaginable scale, and it's bankruptin' the entire world.

These bankers oughta be arrested for fraud, and the Federal Reserve Bank oughta be shut down for good, and a new US dollar started up that is created by the government, not by a private bank....and that is redeemable in a stated and fixed amount of something REAL...such as silver coins or gold coins or bullion. It was done before. For a long time. It could certainly be done again. If it was, you'd have a real currency again, a stable currency with a real value, instead of the phony Monopoly money we've got now.

The country is not poor. It has great natural resources, both material and human (plus us primates, of course)...but it's staggerin' under a massive load of unreal DEBT that was created by the bankers and their pyramid schemes of phony money that they created in a Godlike manner with the stroke of a pen. The only way to set America free is to cancel the past mountain of debts from the pyramid scheme and NEVER AGAIN allow the private banks to perpetrate such a scheme or to control the creation of the national currency.

This would require strict regulation of lending practices by banks. That can be done. It should be done.

I still remember when the beautiful silver coins we all took for granted all our lives (till then) started disappearin' out of circulation in the mid-60s and got replaced by nickel-plated copper coins that almost looked okay...only you could see the copper ring around the outside edge. That was a depressin' day. It was the end of real money in the USA, and the beginning of debt slavery to the banks and the Fed. A Federal Reserve Note ain't worth nothin' more than the paper it's printed on...meanin'...it's basically worthless...and you can trade it for the modern USA coins that are also basically almost worthless...cos they are not made out of precious metals anymore.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: gnu
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 01:49 PM

I'll volunteer to be Sectretary. Ya know, handle the papers and such.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 01:53 PM

Well, gol danged, Chongz...

Reminds me of that "Taxi" episode where Jim Ignatowski has this scene where there is a piano in the room and he sits down at it and plays a great piece on it and then gets that twisted look on his face and says, "Gee, I didn't know I could play the piano?"...

Well, I guess that was Chongz Jim Ignatowski moment...

BTW, Band of America is offering to forgive up to $150,000 of debt on lots of mortgages but people are reluctant to take them up on the offer because they don't trust the banks anymore... That's purdy bad when the banks are offering free money and folks won't take it because they think they are going to be tricked again...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Ebbie
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 02:26 PM

Good heavens! Chongo sounds like GfS- OK- which one of you is fictional?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 03:04 PM

Both!!! LOL...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 03:27 PM

well seeing how my pocket watch party has to support someone, what is your views on

womenz

rock and roll

and Elvis

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 03:35 PM

I love womenz, rock 'n roll and ol' Elvis (50s)...

Oh, and I own a pocket watch... Doesn't run but I own it...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: fat B****rd
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 03:38 PM

Will Bogarting the joint be punishable by death?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 06:18 PM

well send it to me and I will have it fixed for you ... ya gotta look the part if ya wanna be pres ...

now what about Jello, what can you do to make it illegal

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 07:08 PM

Only if you don't "pass it over to me", fatz...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Skivee
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 08:09 PM

hey, Bobertz ol' buddy. I just heard you was gonna be runnin' fer office again , and I am throwin' my hat into the ring ta be yer veep. I think that iffn you just look at all the hard work I done on the last campain, you'll know I'm yer guy.
Also, I'm good at funerals.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 08:41 PM

Danged, Skivz... Of course, I'd be honored to have you on the ticket... Just don't hire Chongz for nuthin'... He was bad news last time and now has more experience in bad news...

Welcome aboard...

BTW, ya' got any weed???

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 09:39 PM

As the Secretary of Commerce in Bobert's Shadow Cabinet, May I ask, do you mean Jello specifically or all artificially flavored corn syrup sweetened dessert mixes made form boiled animal bones?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 09:48 PM

Well, personally I ain't gonna be a Jello Prez but that;s because Jello is mad from pig feet and I don't eat no pig no matter how it is served...

But if folks wanta cook 'um up a pit full of Jello and waller in the crap then have at it... I mean, I ain't no "Jello Nazi"... I hate hogs, too... They are mean and would take yer ass out in a heart beat... Nasty critters... Eat 'um if or wrestle in their parts, I don't care...

It's called freedom... You know, the real stuff... Not the TeaPub brand of it which means they are free to tell you that you are wrong and proclaim that they are right...

BTW, Jack... Welcome aboard...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 09:55 PM

I gotta warn you Bobert, I'm a panderer. If Olddude wants it banned. We'll get er done!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 10:06 PM

Not to worry, Jack...

I'm going to create a Department of Pocket Watches and Ol'ster gonna be the Secretary... That will keep him busy... You'll have a free reign and not have to worry about him lookin' over yer shoulder... We're looking at openin' a Smithsonian Pocket Watch museum...

Wonder if there are any that run on cannibus???

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 10:58 PM

Ya got sundials, hourglasses, and water clocks, Bobertz...but no one has yet designed a clock that runs on cannabis.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 11:12 PM

Ol'ster is workin' on it, Chongz... He's gonna be my Secretary of Cannibus Fueled Pocket Watches....

Too bad that you were such a bad Chongz last time 'er I ight have given you a 2nd chance but I don't think the voters are gonna like me establishing a Department of Monkey Poo... Know what I mean??? You'd think that by now you'd be at least at dog's level but you ain't...

LH poo on the floor??? I don't think so... Maybe you need to have a little talk with him... No, make that a long talk with him...

Until you get a grip on yer bathroom (or lack there of) habits, yer just another one trick monkey... I don't care if you can load and shoot up a joint with an AK47... Big deal... At the end of the day there's still monkey poo in the corner of the living room...

Get a friggin' grip, man!!!

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 12 Jul 12 - 11:32 PM

I will take the job, and I figure if ya smoke enough weed, yer watch is always on time ... that way ya don't have to fix em either ..

Heck I have even seen em run backwards when ya get into the real good stuff ...

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: JennieG
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 03:49 AM

Bobert, if you win will there be jelly wrestling? in green jello?

Almost makes me wish I was Amurcan just so's I could vote.....

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Sawzaw
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 07:55 AM

Condi for veep!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 10:15 AM

Condi is a hottie, that much is fir sure so...

... I doubt if it would work out... I'd spend too much time checkin' her out (if ya' know what I mean, heh, heh...) and not enough time prez-dentin'...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 11:32 AM

Condi is more likely to sign on with Bobert than Romney.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 12:17 PM

Well, she has endorsed Romney, Jack... I saw her on CBS morning show and she sho nuff did...

But if I'm elected and Condi wants to come on over and give me a little piano lesson then I think we could work it out...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 01:16 PM

If yer talkin' about Condoleeza Rice...that is one scary woman. I would never turn my back on her, lemme tell ya. Not fer a second.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 03:02 PM

I don't see her running for Vice Pres is all.

I just don't see the rompster putting a 57 year old single woman who once slipped and called W "my husband" on the ticket.

But stranger things have happened (Sarah Palin)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 03:09 PM

I think the USA is ready for Ann Coulter to be vice president. She makes about as much sense as what-will-you-give-me-say-the-bells-of Romney.

Join the voters' revolution. Support off-shore banking and off-shore manufacturing. Vote Romney/Coulter.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 07:54 PM

Well, if you told me that I would win with that ugly woman as my VP or be embarrassed miserably in the election with a sane VP I'd take the latter... She is so ugly that she'd make a freight train jump tracks and take a dirt road... She is so ugly that if I were married to her I'd take her to work with to me just to avoid having to kiss her good-bye... I mean, ugly as a mud fence... Eat up ugly...

Heck, I'd take Chongz over that witch...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 09:09 PM

Looks, schmooks. I want branes. The universe is not three-dimensional.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 09:19 PM

So Coulter has brains??? Not according to the xrays... The woman is not only ugly but brainless...

Yer right about the universe... It's 4 dimensional... And counting...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 13 Jul 12 - 11:06 PM

Brains, schmanes. I meant branes.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Skivee
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 01:58 AM

Bobert In Chief, I'm happy to accept yer kind offer

Talking point #1>About yer admoanition "Just don't hire Chongz for nuthin'" I' admit to being a mite cornfused. I hate that damned poo-flingin' lesser ape. I didn't hire him befer. I thought you did!!!


Talking point#2>" BTW, ya' got any weed???"
shucks , I was about to ask you the same
it's just this kind of qualerty communing that give me hope fer yer chances at the poles.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 09:43 AM

W3ell, gol danged, Skivz...

I thought you hired him??? No???

Guess neither of us hired him... That little weasel was probably hired by Obama of McCain to sabotage our campaign... Hmmmmmm??? Now I see how it all worked...

B;~(

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 01:05 PM

Hey, Bobert? Chongo took a digital photo of you from that Sidewalk Bob CD you sent, blew it up to a big size, put it on the wall, drew a red circle and crosshairs on it, and he is using it for daily target practice.

It looks like hell, all full of holes now.

He says he'll use the jpeg to make another one when this one gets unrecognizable.

He's also put the same art on a dartboard and has it mounted in his office.

I think he's trying to send you some kind of message.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 01:42 PM

"a chicken in every pot, weed in every brownie"
second thought "chicken and pot in every pot"

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 01:44 PM

our theme song in the key of blues

"We got no worries, we got no cares, we got no troubled mind
the blues don't mean a thing to us, we stay stoned out .. all the time"

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 03:23 PM

Yo, Chongz... I took yer picture and had it made into vinyl wallpaper and wallpapered the inside of my toilet with it...

Bombs away, buddy!!!

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 04:59 PM

LOL!!!

Tit for tat, eh, Bobert? I wonder what Chongo's response to that will be?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 14 Jul 12 - 05:18 PM

Vegas has it 7-3 it will be of a scatological nature...

No matter... Me and Chongz have an understanding... He thinks I'm a dumbass hillbilly and I think he's a dumbass monkey... Guess it just stays a stalemate... Well, until he picks up his AK-47 and then it kinda escalates for a day 'er two... Sorry you have to put up with him when he's like that... I'm sure it requires a lot of patience...

No matter... If I do get elected there won't be any room for Chnogs in my administration... I was thinking of a Department of Poo Throwing but seems that Saws has beaten Chongz out for that one...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 11:01 AM

chongo is only running to get free bananas for monkeys. I mean he knows nothing of the health and magical powers of weed

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 12:55 PM

Word on the street is that Chongz smokes the banana peels... I don't have first hand knowledge but when he worked for me in '08 I had my suspicions...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 01:58 PM

He smokes cigars. Preferably Cuban cigars. They are the best, after all, and all the really major players (like Bill Clinton or Donald Trump) insist on Cuban cigars.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 02:06 PM

I knew about the cigars, LH... Smelly things but not as smelly as Chongz poo...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 02:16 PM

Chongo is deeply hurt by your scatological accusations, Bobert. Don't you realize that by talking to him in that fashion you are engaging in blatant specism?

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 02:25 PM

Blatent-shmatent, LH...

Nothin' hurts Chongz feelings... He has none... He a big faker... He probably just wants something from you... Soon as he gets it he'll be happy... One thing about Chonnz... He's a good actor but that's about all he good at... Can't even shoot straight... That's why he likes AK-47s... Bound to hit something... I mean, even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and then...

Speaking of nuts...

Oh, never mind...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 04:46 PM

Okay, I'm gonna be blunt, Bobert. When you accuse Chongo of flingin' poop, it's like you were saying to a Black man: "Hey, boy! You want a nice fresh watermelon to munch on while you wait around for the welfare check to arrive?"

Whaddya think is gonna happen?

And he does not use AK-47's! He uses a Thompson submachine gun and a model M1911 Colt .45 pistol. I mean, those are his favorites. He's got some other handguns too, but those 2 are the ones he prefers. The Colt is for ordinary days, and fits nicely inside his jacket. The Thompson is for more difficult days when the opposition is a bit nastier (or numerous) than usual.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 05:33 PM

Wait a minute, LH... I didn't accuse yer monkey of poo chuckin' until he did it... I was okay with him hanging out and then found out that he has some fascination with his own poo???

I had a client like that when I was a social worker... Didn't much like it then either so it ain't about black men, yellow or green men... It's about scatological stuff that most folks get right but others don't...

BTW, I'm part of the group that gets it right and I 'm sure you are as well so you should get this kinda shit, ahhhhh, stuff...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 06:15 PM

when does the"party" start there bobster, ya said party and I got my party hat and noise maker and looking fer drinks, pizza, womenz and weed ... where is the party when does it start

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 08:35 PM

I reckon the night that NBC announces that I have been elected... Put the noise makers aside... Word on the street is that I've made it onto the Koch brother's radar screen....

B;~(

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jul 12 - 11:45 PM

That worm won't crawl.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 01:45 AM

Hey, LH. That worm might not crawl, but that stinkingvmonkey definately flings poo. When he was "working" my buddy Bobert's campaign, intead of stuffing envelopes and calling donors, he split his office time half and half flinging poo and "pleasuring himself" with bananas.
I don't think he earned a single vote, and probably cost us thousands. Furry jerk.

You tell him that I will kick his furry poo-smeared ass if he even thinks about dropping by, and if I have a gun handy, he's a dead simian.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 03:17 AM

>>>"Okay, I'm gonna be blunt, Bobert. When you accuse Chongo of flingin' poop, it's like you were saying to a Black man: "Hey, boy! You want a nice fresh watermelon to munch on while you wait around for the welfare check to arrive?"<<<

I think its more like accusing LeBron James of playing basketball.

A lot of chimps fling it but Congo....

He is the MVP, Most Valuable Poo-flinger.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 06:54 AM

BTW, LH... Tell Chongz that if I am elected I won't push any legislation that would in any manner restrict him from chuckin' his poo... I might, however, restrict poo-chuckin' to the personal residences of the chuckers or poo chucking zones... You know, like paint ball is now...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 11:10 AM

You know what is gonna happen to all you specist bastards after I get elected? Hmm? It ain't gonna be nice. You'll see.

Bobertz is probably the top specist hatemonger in the entire USA at this point. He has been spreadin' lies and slander about me for years, blatant lies and fabrications. He uses the "P" word shamelessly and frequently. He encourages others to use it. His specist prejudices are plain for all to see. He depicts all primates as "dumb monkeys". He says they have fleas. He says they play with their own excrement and throw it at others. He dares to openly use the "P" word, the ultimate specist label.

Certain other deluded humans have joined him in this cowardly form of species attack, thus branding themselves as specist hatemongers too.

Under my administration overt acts of specism will no longer be tolerated. There will be stiff penalties for utterin' specist remarks. The purveyors of hate will be muzzled and prosecuted to the full extent of the law. An amendment will be made to the Constitution, establishin' full equality for all humans and primates and bannin' segregation of humans and primates.

I know it is little use talkin' to you, Bobertz, because you are a committed specist who ain't one bit ashamed of what he is and what he does. As such, you are nothing less than a mortal enemy of society, and you will be dealt with, make no mistake about that, buster!

Enjoy yer freedom to be a specist jerk while ya still got it, coz it ain't gonna be too much longer.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 02:25 PM

No, Chonz, you got it wrong... I am a mortal enemy of poo chuckin' monkeys...

Oh, and BTW, word on the street is that you ain't gonna win... Vegas has my chances of winning 4 times higher than yours and they're pretty sure I ain't gonna win either... Truth be known we'd have a better chance of buying a winning Power Ball ticket...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Amergin
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 02:39 PM

I don't know what you all have against Jello. He seems to be a good guy, very bright, very articulate, in fact I saw him on Oprah once, back in the day, where he beat the crap out of Tipper Gore over the censorship issue. I think you should make him your running mate!

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 02:43 PM

Who is Jello??? Chris "Kristy "Kreame" of N.J.???

Not on my list... He's too much like my Couzin Buddy from Jersey...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 04:17 PM

BTW, LH... I ain't generalizing about the entire monkey kingdom here... Just yer monkey... That doesn't make me a specists... Plus, some of my best friends are monkeys....

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 05:25 PM

How many times I gotta tell you....CHONGO IS NOT A MONKEY!!!! He's an ape. Your labelling of him as a monkey is itself a specist stereotype of the meanest sort...or it's an indication of sheer ignorance on your part...but I frankly don't think you are that ignorant.

And neither will the Senate subcommittee when they put you on trial for specism (after Chongo wins the election). It'll be just like the HUAC all over again, buddy, only the Chimps will have their day this time. You'll be squirming and sweating under the cameras, trying to explain away your antisocial acts and utterances while the noose of public judgement steadily tightens around your nuts...

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 05:46 PM

Ape??? Monkey??? Gorilla??? Human??? Hey, we're all primates, man... If I call a brim a blue gill or a crappie a perch who the heck cares??? They all fish... Guess I'm a fishist, too... Oh yeah... I call a cricket a grasshopper then I'm an insectist... Call a cabbage lettuce then I'm a vegetablist...

Think yer in silly mode, LH... Go play some music, drenk a cold one 'er watch some "I Love Lucy" reruns until it passes...

BTW, should I get elected you are in the running for Secretary of the Department of Pain in the Butt...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Jul 12 - 05:55 PM

Hmmm. Well, thanks for the cabinet offer, Bobert. ;-) I'll have to think seriously about that. I bet the pay is way better than my present level of remuneration.

By the way, watching "I Love Lucy" reruns is almost the worst thing I can even imagine being forced to do. ARRGH! But not quite as bad as watching "Three's Company".

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 11:51 AM

So...I figger we've about squeezed the last drop of cow juice outta this meadow muffin, huh, Bobertz? This thread, I mean. Face it, buddy, you started a useless dumbass thread here about somethin' that is never gonna happen, coz you got about as much chance of bein' elected president of the USA as William Shatner has of bein' elected president of the "Thin People of America" (TPA).

That means none. Zippo! Zilch! No public in the world would be stupid enough to vote you in as their leader no matter how desperate they were for change. Some changes just ain't worth contemplatin', see? Puttin' you in the White House would be about as smart as puttin' Cheech and Chong in charge of the friggin' Pentagon! Ook! Ook!

You would be real lucky to even get elected dogcatcher, fer Chrissake! And I mean in a really small place, some hick town that's only got 25 people and maybe 5 or 6 dogs. Even there, I bet you'd get beat out by the challenger, even if it was a 6 year old kid or an old lady in a wheelchair.

Now lissen, chump, I am gettin' tired of you spreadin' lies about me and usin' the "P" word against me. You want a piece of ME? Huh? I'll tell you what I am gonna do if you don't lay off. I am gonna contact the sewage disposal people in your hick municipality...it's called "Dogpatch", right?....and I am gonna PAY them to deliver all the sewage they GOT and dump it right out of their tanker trucks right at yer front door AND in yer swimmin' pool! You can do what you like with it from there. Have a nice swim, Zeke.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Amergin
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 03:35 PM

Jello is from San Francisco! How could you not know Jello? What have you been doing, listening to folk and blues all your life? He ran for mayor of San Francisco in 1979....

His platform was making businessmen wear clown suits in the city limits, erecting statues of Dan White all over town and having the parks department sell eggs and tomatoes for people to throw at them, hire city workers to become pan handlers in rich neighbourhoods, banning on cars in the city, legalisiing squatters in vacant buildings, and requiring police officers to run for election in the neighbourhoods they patrol in order to keep their jobs.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 05:19 PM

Go smoke another banana peel, Chongz...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,amergin
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 06:36 PM

Bobertz, if you want to pay a million dollars, I can get you footage of Chongo going down on a banana.

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 06:56 PM

That's nothin'. For a mere $300,000 I can get you a video of Angelina Jolie doin' that. A bargain at the price!

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: Bobert 4 Prez... Stoners Party...
From: Bobert
Date: 17 Jul 12 - 07:07 PM

You take plastic, Chongz???

B;~)