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Lyr Add: Bi-Party Line (the vote)
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Subject: Lyr Add: Bi-Party Line : Flanders & Swann From: keberoxu Date: 27 Jun 16 - 07:13 PM BI-PARTY LINE words: Michael Flanders music: Donald Swann from: Fresh Air (revue, late 1950's) At the Random Division (South) Bye-Election, the Conservative Party candidate and the Labour Party candidate Welcome you to this combined Party political meeting The eyes of the world are upon you Will the last man shut the door You -- my audience of seven You -- my audience of four You have studied our Party pamphlets, and so by the way have we Now will one of you kindly tell us where we're meant to disagree For it seems to us that before very long, to quote Mister Gilbert and quote him wrong: Each little MP that's born alive, and his parliamentary neighbour, Will be either Labour-Conservative or else Conservative-Labour [Continue, with Donald Swann as the Conservative candidate and Michael Flanders as the Labour candidate] Give us the chance to solve the burning questions of the hour FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative We're for cutting National Service when the other lot's in power FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative We're both for full employment, both accept the Welfare state We've a single foreign policy, too little and too late Now don't be apathetic, try to differentiate FLANDERS: I'm Labour SWANN: I'm Conservative When we reach the House of Commons, when its bastions are stormed FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative Then the catering department will be thoroughly reformed FLANDERS: By Labour SWANN: Or Conservative We're for equal pay for women -- in another year or two We're dead against inflation [LOOKING AT EACH OTHER] Why, good heavens, so are you We used to beg to differ, now we're beggared if we do SWANN: He's Labour FLANDERS: He's Conservative (to be concluded) |
Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Bi-Party Line (the vote) From: keberoxu Date: 27 Jun 16 - 07:25 PM While Donald Swann strikes up a full verse, without words, at the piano, Michael Flanders announces: DANCE. Nursing a constituency. Catching the floating vote. Toeing the party line. THE CABINET SHUFFLE! FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative We're for helping backward nations like the Cypriots along FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative We're for self-determination, if they don't determine wrong FLANDERS: That's Labour SWANN: That's Conservative So exercise the right of ev'ry true democracy You must elect a member and it's either him or me [at this point, in their enthusiasm, the candidates get confused somewhat] SWANN: You can vote for Twaddle-Dum FLANDERS: Or you can vote for Twaddle-Dee SWANN: Vote Labour FLANDERS: Vote Conservative [WHOOPS] after one line of music, they regroup: FLANDERS: Vote Labour SWANN: Vote Conservative © The Estate of Michael Flanders |
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