BS: My very own Trump thread

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 04:03 PM

Trump could create absolutely YUGE numbers of jobs by issuing an executive order requiring that every adult American own at least one pheasant.

Why, PetSmart alone would need to hire a bazillion new workers just to sell pheasant cages, pheasant food, and cute little plaid jackets for pheasants to wear during cold weather.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: meself
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 03:11 PM

Hate to change the subject, but .... For awhile I was thinking, Trump will start losing support when his supporters realize that he hasn't created any new jobs after a year or so - but now I think that job-creation really doesn't matter: he will just tell them he's created millions of jobs and they will believe him ... this really is depressing ....

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 02:33 PM

Picture made me laugh Bee

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 02:29 PM

"Is that Pheasant a Poo Relation? Or someone who gives a shit? Unlike............. er, oops, I nearly strayed on-topic."

You're all right, mate. Accidentally nearly straying on-topic is the main point of the thread. The more "oopses, nearly strayed on-topic!" we get, the better!

I have a bird-bath on a plinth that my late aunt gave us. Great sentimental value. Casually glanced out of the kitchen window this afternoon only to see Phil the pheasant sitting on it doing his I'm-the-king-of-the-castle thing. Very amusing sight it was. I've now cleared the poo out of the bird bath.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 02:13 PM

We also have a puss moth, Acme, but it's a different species and the caterpillar looks nothing like yours. I like to think that it's distanced itself...

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: punkfolkrocker
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 02:03 PM

"Herring gulls are actually regarded as a vulnerable species"...!!!???

Bah.. harumph... this is what's wrong with the world.. I tell you it's PC gone mad...!!!!! 😜

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 01:41 PM

Raggytash, are you saying that the difference between the photo of T**** and the photo of the bird is that one is just one prize cock whereas the other is a prize cockatoo?

Herring gulls are actually regarded as a vulnerable species, believe it or not. When one nicks your ice cream or your cod in batter it's only being a gull, and we have sort of encouraged 'em with our slack attitude to leaving waste lying around and chucking 'em titbits.

Down on Bude canal people feeding the ducks cause a frenzy. Mallards are aggressive birds which land on water with a spectacular splash. But the black-headed gulls are amazing to watch - they land so delicately that they hardly cause a ripple. Dammit, I love 'em all, and they are dinosaurs, don't forget! Been down there this afternoon. Gorgeous sunny day with the mercury up around fifteen.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Senoufou
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 12:48 PM

A sort of strange, sprayed-on-looking orange......

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Senoufou
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 12:27 PM

Hahahaha! I'm laughing my head off at this thread, it's brilliant!

We found a huge queen W.A.S.P. in the conservatory. They're coming out of hibernation just now and looking for somewhere to build their Headquarters. They can sting like anything. We put it in the garden shed.

Husband is cooking a turkey leg stew thing. He puts peanut butter (!), tomato paste, spinach, chopped Tesco apologies-for-tomatoes, onions, loads of Flora cooking oil, a crumbled Maggi stock cube, far too much salt and coarsely-ground pepper, two tablespoons of Madras curry powder, and five Scotch bonnets squashed with a spoon. He then adds boiling water and stirs up the concoction, adding the meat from the turkey leg (and the skin - Africans never waste anything edible) Once the cats start coughing their little lungs out, he starts the rice-boiler and in a few minutes his Hot Horror is ready. If one put a tiny little bit on one's tongue, it would be off to A&E. The kitchen ceiling is now a fetching shade of orange.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: punkfolkrocker
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 12:14 PM

Seagulls are nasty c@nts... the tories & ukip of all the avian species.... 😡

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 11:36 AM

If the pheasant is too pleasant an avatar for the named thread topic, I'll offer this nasty piece of work in the insect world, the aptly nicknamed Puss caterpillar. These things sting like a sumobitch if you brush against one. I've been stung a couple of times - you want to amputate the limb to stop the pain for the first hour or so after contact. (The adult is called the "flannel moth.")

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Mr Red
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 11:30 AM

Is that Pheasant a Poo Relation? Or someone who gives a shit? Unlike............. er, oops, I nearly strayed on-topic.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Greg F.
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 09:51 AM

Or, in Trump's case, a dodo? Unfortunately, the wrong one's extinct.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Raggytash
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 09:50 AM

Are you sure thats not a cockatoo

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 09:28 AM

I move that this thread be disqualified for inadequate thread drift. As this image shows, there is far too much of a direct correlation between Donald Trump and a pheasant to make carrying on about Phil the pheasant true thread drift. Please find an emu or ostrich to carry on pointlessly about.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 09:14 AM

I am always interested when the word "seagull" is used as it is covers so many species.
We get Common gull and black-headed gulls here all the year round with occasional visits from Greater and Lesser black-backed gulls and some Herring gulls. And this is at least 30 miles from the sea! It gets very confusing as they vary in plumage so much between juveniles and adults.
I think the supermarket tomatoes are actually getting worse over the years.

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 09:06 AM

Saw an article in a magazine about how they love guindilla chillies in the Basque Country so I bought a jar. They came picked in spirit vinegar. I could easily have scoffed the whole lot even though a mild fire was burning in my mouth and tum. They're a bit thick-skinned but I'm a convert. Mrs Steve won't even try one. I may finish the jar this evening!

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Senoufou
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 08:55 AM

Our conservatory windows and even the car are simply covered in poo from those ferocious seagulls. It's all my husband's fault. He's been putting out bread for them, as he thinks they're fabuluosly beautiful birds, "So big, and so shining!" They fight like anything with the other, smaller birds, grab all the available food and swallow it whole, then have a sideways poo at the windows as they depart. If only they'd poo on my husband, perhaps he'd be a little disenchanted and stop spoiling them.
Supermarket tomatoes are horrible. As you say Steve, completely flavourless. The ones we grow in our greenhouse are gorgeous. The smell! The taste! We grow several varieties, from those tiny ones up to the big 'beef' ones. But that's for late summer. Until then, my husband uses Tesco ones for cooking and slings in half a dozen Scotch bonnets so the taste of anything at all is swamped by fiery stinging heat. Yuk.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 08:30 AM

Yeh that link was a bit amusing snail . In fact the whole things laughable !                      Getting back on topic : we kept some ducks in our back garden once and they used to use the back door step as their loo . Which just reminded me of the experiment I heard about where monkeys were given keyboards to see if they could produce anything coherent, but they mostly used them as toilets .   We used to have a goat too , and she had a habit of jumping sideways onto the window sill to look in on us .

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 07:53 AM

He's bloody well-fed. Costs me a fortune and what thanks do I get? A poo-laden back door step! 😩💩

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: gillymor
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 07:41 AM

Good to know, if he's like our pheasants over here he's probably a pretty stout fellow.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 07:23 AM

The nearest house is almost half a mile away and there are no cats. Plenty of buzzards round here, but they'd rather eat worms and beetles than go for pheasants, lazy buggers. I've seen little kestrels bringing down big, fat wood-pigeons and we have sparrowhawks as well, but Phil doesn't give a stuff.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: gillymor
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:51 AM

Straying-on which topic, Steve? Lumping Phil in with the likes of scum like Trump doesn't seem quite fair.
Are you sure you're not endangering this ground-dwelling bird by feeding him? He could be easy prey for some feline.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:48 AM

"The mob would be out in force, "
It only takes one to nause up a friendy thread
You really can't win with these people, can you
Jim Carroll

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:29 AM

Ask him why he's not a pheasant plucker.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: akenaton
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:28 AM

Hello Raggytash, very well thank you, and thank you very much for the further information....A

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Raggytash
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:22 AM

Good morning Akenaton, are you OK.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:10 AM

Shhhhhh....

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: akenaton
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:06 AM

Oh dear!...just imagine the outcry had some idiot put President Obama at the end of the process......the sky would certainly have fallen.
The mob would be out in force, even the proper liberals would have been slightly offended......;0)

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:05 AM

I was about to give you a very stern warning there for straying on-topic, Snail, but that is SO bloody funny! 😂😂😂😂😂

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: DMcG
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:04 AM

I object: this thread is not drifting enough, in direct opposition to the expressed wishes of the opening poster.

Now *I* want to know why my printer keeps insisting it is out of paper when it demonstrably isn't.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:03 AM

I usually find tomatoes bought in winter to be a bit insipid. I look out for the labels to make sure they come from as far south as possible. Just had some nice cherry toms on the vine from Waitrose that were grown in Sicily. Shops ruin tomatoes by keeping them cold. Low temperatures switch off genes that promote the production of those lovely tomatoey flavour volatiles, leaving just sugar and acid tastes. The genes don't switch back on even if the toms are warmed back up. The worst thing is to keep tomatoes in the fridge. Another tip is, when making tomato soup or tomato sauce, to add half a teaspoon of sugar. The Italians do it all the time even though their tomatoes are lovely already. It works - don't ask me why! I've found that tinned plum tomatoes are just as good as the real McCoy most of the time for sauces and soups. Supermarket brands can be a bit chemical and stalky and I'm particularly not fond of Morrisons. My favourite brand is Cirio - very reliable with good, thick juice. Napolina are OK too.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Raggytash
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 06:00 AM

Nellie the Elephant ........................




.... she went Trump Trump Trump

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: TheSnail
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 05:48 AM

Trump Evolution

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Raggytash
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 05:31 AM

A couple of weeks ago in my weekly shop I bought a large amount of tomatoes. I am the only person in the house that eats tomatoes as they seem to affect my good ladies Rheumatism. Last week I bought more tomatoes thus I has a surfeit.

This morning I have made some Tomato Soup so they don't go to waste. It's rather good even if I do say so myself.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Raggytash
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 05:10 AM

Dave is walking up in Ribblehead today, I might go and join him for a pint later I think they are having a session tonight.

Just think about it, music, song, laughter .............. and no f'ing Mudcat

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Stu
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 04:52 AM

Yay! Way to go Steve ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Stanron
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 04:45 AM

Senoufou wrote: Our mob of ferocious seagulls were being very unkind to Phred, so he eventually phled.

The battles of the forum echoed in the garden, but which is which?

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Senoufou
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 04:40 AM

Trump is indeed a twat, but dangerous too.

We had a male pheasant in our small garden two days ago. The shooting season is in full swing and I reckon he was sheltering from the guns, poor chap. We already had a Mr Magniphicent in our last house, so this one is Phred. They do seem to produce an awful lot of poo don't they? Our mob of ferocious seagulls were being very unkind to Phred, so he eventually phled.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Mr Red
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 03:27 AM

There is no final word on Twitler.

History will be written (is being), history will be re-written, alternative facts will come to light (are), he may light the blue touch paper. Let us just call it "alt-history", it is already being laid down on the world wide waste.

That is the nature of divisive people.

And just to set the proper trend, may I compliment Mr Steve Shaw on his keen analysis and erudition. Not that I am fishing for compliments you understand .

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: EBarnacle
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 12:30 AM

So singe the feathers, staying upwind.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 08:56 PM

Yebbut he's a luvly feller....and I'm hardly what you might call a pheasant plucker...

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Stanron
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 08:54 PM

Yes you could have your Phil and eat it.

Subject: RE: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 08:22 PM

Always eat Phil, though I'm loath to repeat that.

Subject: BS: My very own Trump thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 08:20 PM

Got badly told off by Stu on his "alternative doodah" thread for talking about what he didn't think his thread was about, and gillymor therein enjoined me to "start my own Trump thread." Thus chided, I've decided to comply. So, in line with Stu's strictures in his thread, here are my rules for this thread. There are no rules. This thread is about Trump, but I, the thread owner, policeman and dictator of this thread, will be severely pissed off should ANYONE (yes, this means you, Jim, Raggytash, Dave, and anyone else lusting to be a member of the elite section of tbe Usual Suspects) stick to the subject. Only thread drift will be tolerated. I'm going to start off with the Final Word on Trump, then I shall drift this thread.

Final word on Trump: he's a twat.

Now the weather in Bude is very mild at the moment. I've been revelling in the joy of the multitudinous visitors to my bird table. But I have a major problem. A spectacular male pheasant, who we've named Phil, has been a regular guest for weeks. Almost a pet pheasant, he doesn't run away when I open the back door. In fact, he will nibble my nuts right up to my feet. Peanuts, duh. The problem is that he has commandeered our back door step as his lavatorium. We are inadvertently treading pheasant shit everywhere. I know we could lays eat Phil. But does anyone have a more humane solution?