Song Challenge! Part 20

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: KT
Date: 18 Apr 00 - 01:59 AM

Hi, Aine. Yes I could put it on an audio tape, but it'll have to wait. I've just returned from a recent festival and I'm now suffering from a bad case of overdidititis. My voice has taken temporary leave ( as did the sense to stop jamming and get some rest) Oh well. It was worth it!!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Amergin
Date: 22 Apr 00 - 03:36 PM

Kelida, the Highwayman is one of the best poems ever written. You did great justice to it. I love your piece.

Here's my song (the feeble attempt it is):

The Woods I Loved So Well (Tune: Town I Loved So Well)

In my memory I will always see
The woods I loved so well
Where I walked the green halls, in the spring and the fall
As I would sing through the green dusty smell
Running home by the rails, and down the dark trails
Past the dyke, and down by the river
Those were happy days, in so many ways
In the woods I loved so well

In the early morn with a sound so forlorn
The rooster would sing his grand wake up call
Would wake the farmers to work on their lands,
Milk the cows; feed their horses and hogs.
At the end of each day, I would roam my own way
Hear birds singing in the sunlight
Their chests puffed with pride, my heart swelled inside
In the woods I loved so well

There was music there in the wooded air
That made me want to sing my best
The birds danced in the trees and mingled with the bees
As I stopped to take my rest
Then I had to move and to tell you the truth
I never wanted to leave my home behind me
For I learned about love from the skies above
In the woods I loved so well

When I came back, how my eyes went black
To see all those trees razed to the floor
By the lumberjack and the tractor cat
The dust is blown onto every door
Now there are houses installed by the old cliffside wall
And the damn foundations get higher and higher
With their hammers and their trucks, oh my god what have they done?
To the woods I loved so well

Now the birds are gone, but I still sing on
Though nature is bruised, bruised but never broken
For my ears are ringing, with the silence of their singing
I look forward to their songs to come again
For the houses are bought, so are the empty lots
And the trees are lost and gone forever
I can only pray the birds come back someday
To the place they loved so well.

Amergin

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Áine
Date: 22 Apr 00 - 06:48 PM

Dear Amergin,

A very appropriate and lovely entry for this Challenge! and well timed for Earth Day, too. Your song has been posted on the SONG CHALLENGE! WINNERS PAGE as a Winner of the Golden Cow Chip with Harp Ribbon. Well done!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 27 Aug 01 - 01:33 PM

I turned the topic on to one of the saddest things in today's society. I hope I've made a point.

"The woods would be silent indeed if only the best birds sang".

Only the best

My little bird is lying
Lying in her nest
My little bird is dying
Tying to be the best

If you could only hear her song
Then you would know that it's so wrong
Were creating a world where children don't belong

My little girl is starving
I worry bout her health
When the food is carving
she runs off by herself

Has to be so skinny
She cannot have meat
Has to wear that mini
So she just will not eat

If you could only hear her song
Then you would know that it's so wrong
Were creating a world where children don't belong

Make her wear some make up
Though she's only nine
So much ground to make up
to catch Leanne Rhymes

Put her through the grinder
Treat her like some meat
Take a key and wind her
Prime her for defeat

If you could only hear her song
Then you would know it's so wrong
We are creating a world where she doesn't belong

One winner will win
the rest will all lose
How can we begin
to choose

Beauty show drama
for entertainment
For most girls trauma
Their values bent

If you could only see the lie
Then you would know why young girls die
It's a sad sad world its a pain to see them cry

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: MMario
Date: 27 Aug 01 - 02:16 PM

you made your point well enough that I had to take a break halfway through reading it.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 27 Aug 01 - 03:45 PM

I turned the topic on to one of the saddest things in today's society. I hope I've made a point. On reading I had some more ideas. Here is a rewrite.

"The woods would be silent indeed if only the best birds sang".

Only the best (second version)

My little bird is lying Lying in her nest My little bird is dying Trying to be the best

My little bird is Humming As she plays the game Work hard on becoming A truly famous name

Why won't my little bird sing Really, its such a simple thing What pressures and torments do we bring

My little girl is starving I worry bout her health When the food is carving she runs off by herself

Has to be so skinny She cannot have meat Has to wear that mini So she just will not eat

If you could only hear her true song Then you would know that it is so wrong Were creating a world where children don't belong

Make her wear some make up To catch Leanne Rhymes Perhaps its time to wake up because she's only nine

Put her through the grinder Treat her like some meat Take a key and wind her Prime her for defeat

If you could only listen to her heart Then you would know the hardest part Where do you begin, and where do you start

One winner will win the rest will all lose How can we begin to choose

Beauty show drama Fame and wealth Beckoned Imagine the trauma When they finish a mere second

If you could only see the lie Then you would know why young girls die In a sad sad world its a pain to see them cry

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 27 Aug 01 - 04:11 PM

I turned the topic on to one of the saddest things in today's society. I hope I've made a point. On reading I ahd some more ideas. Here is a rewrite with line breaks.

"The woods would be silent indeed if only the best birds sang".

Only the best

My little bird is lying
Lying in her nest
My little bird is dying
Trying to be the best

My little bird is Humming
As she plays the game
Work hard on becomming
A truly famous name

Why won't my little bird sing?
Really, its such a simple thing.
What pressures and torments do we bring?

My little girl is starving
I worry bout her health
When the food is carving
she runs off by herself

Has to be so skinny
She cannot have meat
Has to wear that mini
So she just will not eat

If you could only hear her true song
Then you would know that it is so wrong
Were creating a world where children don't belong

Make her wear some make up
To catch Leanne Rhymes
Perhaps its time to wake up
because she's only nine

Put her through the grinder
Treat her like some meat
Take a key and wind her
Prime her for defeat

If you could only listen to her heart
Then you would know the hardest part
Where do you begin, and where do you start

One winner will win
the rest will all lose
How can we begin
to choose

Beauty show drama
Fame and wealth Beckoned
Imagine the trauma
When they finish a mere second

If you could only see the lie
Then you would know why young girls die
In a sad sad world its a pain to see them cry

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Aidan Crossey
Date: 29 Aug 01 - 09:35 AM

A Challenge! that finds me replying in serious vein! Áine, you've found my Achilles heel. (Well - Achill heel actually as this song is based - loosely - on a real-life experience as a callow youth in that part of the world.)

It's to the tune "The Dawning Of The Day" as used for Raglan Road.

When first her eyes flashed fire at mine
My fate at once was sealed
Such a pretty face, such charm and grace
Were never before revealed
To one so green, so raw, so rough
That I looked the other way
And I watched the waves drown the prints she'd made
As she walked across the bay

To take the air in the dead of night
I walked along the strand
I didn't hear her drawing near
But felt her take my hand
And teasingly she asked if I
Had seen her face before
As she made her way along the bay
At the foot of the Slievemore

And I that flashed a smile at you
Would melt a sea of ice
But in return my look you spurned
And turned away your eyes
And now I'm thinking I've done wrong
To be so bold and free
To take a chance on an advance
Which you've thrown back at me

That's not the way, I then began
And bashful all the while
My heart leapt, I nearly wept
To be honoured by your smile
But I am rough and raw and green
And you're a jewel girl
And a spurned advance 'rising from that glance
Would have brought grief to my world

Oh Johnny, dear she smiled again
And I felt again the pang
The woods would be a quiet place
If the best birds only sang
The sky at night would give no light
If the bright stars only shone
And you shall shine and you shall sing
And I shall teach the song

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: GUEST,KT
Date: 29 Aug 01 - 10:42 AM

derrymacash, that is beautiful!!!! Especially, "And you shall shine and you shall sing And I shall teach the song." Exquisite!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 29 Aug 01 - 02:27 PM

Nice one! you've captured some of the feeling of raglan road, but made it your own.

"As she walked across the bay"

It's a nice picture, a little sureal, what is the thought behind the line Derry?

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Aidan Crossey
Date: 30 Aug 01 - 03:41 AM

KT and Jack ... thanks for the kind words.

Jack ... the word "bay" is commonly used in my neck of the woods to refer not only to the body of water but its shore, hence the line refers to the lady in question walking across the sand (and the preceding line is about the waves washing away the resulting footprints). I never thought that it could be construed otherwise ... goes to show!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: MMario
Date: 30 Aug 01 - 08:37 AM

ssilly me - I thought you were implying that she walked on water!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 20
From: Aidan Crossey
Date: 30 Aug 01 - 08:42 AM

MMario ...

I implied a degree of worship ... but not that much!