Thought for the Day - Apr 14

Subject: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Peter T.
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 09:15 AM

Spring is not spring for all. I went to tea the other day at the house of a wealthy friend of mine who I had gone to university with, and who has had a troubled life. When I arrived, I was surprised to look out at the extensive gardens (famous in the neighbourhood) and see nothing but dark beds of soil. Usually this time of year, they are in their first cycle of daffodils and the beginning of tulips. We walked around in the cold, and she said that it was the first spring she hadn't dreaded in 10 years. She had decided not to plant anything, to let nothing happen. Her father -- whom she loved dearly -- had died 10 years earlier, and he had been a famous gardener. The only request he made to her before he died was that she keep the garden going. She said to me: "I hated every spring, all those flowers coming to life, and him dead. I hated planning them, I hated bringing in the gardener, I hated planting them, I hated watching them grow. I used to sit on my knees in the cold mud and plant these things crying all the time. Summer wasn't so bad. But spring...." There is obviously a lot more going on here than I can talk about -- I suspect that a "fallow year" for her is not a bad thing. I think the flowers will return next year. Nevertheless, it was funny in a sad way to see how relieved, even happy she was, looking out at mounds and frames of dark ground where nothing was happening everywhere.

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 09:27 AM

For some reason this, from, I think, Ronald Searle & Geoffrey Willans' Molesworth books, came into mind:
"O Spring is sprung, the flowers is riz,
I wonder where the birdies is"
Sorry, I just have this strange mind...
RtS

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: GUEST,Brigid in the mountains
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 09:36 AM

apart from the fact that today is my birthday and that I share it with a famous person with whom I have great sympaty (Erich von Däniken ), and that here in the Swiss mountains it is actually trying to be spring, i cannot get my head around that first message. sounds to deep for a beautiful sunny day, and too private to be spread around the net.........somehow??????!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Hyperabid
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 09:38 AM

Daffodils - William Wordsworth

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazed - and gazed - but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon the inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

Regards

Hyp

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: MMario
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 09:45 AM

For the mind and emotions, as well as the soil, sometimes a "fallow year" are necessary - it allows rest, recuperation and later, a return with new energy and a better "harvest"

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Little Neophyte
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 10:06 AM

That is a powerful story Peter.
Who knows what is needed to heal another.
I bet your friend's father had the wisdom to know exactly what his daughter needed to do to clear the pain and heal her loss.
Maybe it took 10 years for your friend to work through her dad passing away but can anyone really know how long it takes for another to heal the pain they carry around with them?

Little Neo

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: GUEST,Mrrzy-at-work
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 11:59 AM

She wore her yellow sunbonnet
She wore her greenest gown
She turned unto the South wind
And curtsied up and down
She turned unto the North wind
And shook her yellow head
And whispered to her neighbor:
"Winter is dead."

Daffodowndilly, by A.A. Milne, in When We Were Very Young. This is from memory, not reading, so I'm not sure it's totally accurate, but the idea seemed to fit.

Who gets to generate Thoughts for the Day? Can anyone?

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: katlaughing
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 12:15 PM

Mrrzy, Peter started out doing them for the weekdays, and I took on the weekends, but really anyone is welcome to post them.

Brigidinthemtns: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! If you come here often, you will find that we do share such personal reflections quite often. Seems to be part fo what makes this such a great community.

I read it a bit differently, than LilNeo did, Peter. It seemed to me a burden laid on your friend by her parent; maybe even a control from beyond, a way to ensure the expectations of the community were met and a legacy upheld. This year it looks as though your friend may have taken control of her own Spring.*smile*

I've often thought of this in relation to my own children; would they even care for and imbue love in those things dear to me when I am gone? Is it fair for me to ask them to? For instance, my cats. This may seem morbid and cruel, but my children and Roger know that if none of them can give the cats a good home if I shuffle off first, they are to have them put down as I know I would be a very restless spirit if my cats wound up living in anything less than the conditions I've felt responsible to provide them with.

Having said all of that, I have to say I hope the perennials do come back to her gardens next year, esp. the daffodils. They are so joyful and can give such delight, while demanding nothing in return.

kat

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Peter T.
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 12:44 PM

Mrrzy, just to add to kat's remarks, this was started just for the heck of it, and it has always been a mix of interesting quotes people find, and since I am an environmentalist I started putting some of my nature diary here, and no one really objected, and so it goes. People sometimes add their own, start the thread for the day, etc., respond. I have recently been so busy that I have been only able to do them at all 2 or 3 times a week, so I have been letting down the side! The more thoughts the better.... I am somewhat amazed to find that I have posted nearly 200 of these!
Anyway, concerning my friend, I have been reluctant to interpret her refusal to garden this year: I think there are bits of both of your interpretations, Little Neo and kat, going on. And more, of course: very tangled.
yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: annamill
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 12:45 PM

When I die, I'm not going to ask my children to continue doing anything!

Love, annap

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: thosp
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 12:48 PM

not even the dishes?

peace (Y) thosp

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 01:21 PM

If my children will just keep on living with all they've got, I reckon I will leave the rest up to them (her). If they goof off, I'll come back and hant 'em!! :>)

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: Sorcha
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 01:44 PM

My mom left me with sooo much baggage, both emotional and physical. I know she didn't do it on purpose, but I am having a difficult time deciding what to do with her Beloved Collections of "stuff" that I am not interested in. She loved her "stuff", and I am trying hard not to feel guilty because I don't value it the way she did. what does one do with 75 antique tins? Or original art/paintings I don't particularly care for? How do you sell/get mercenary about Treasure? (work, work work)

Subject: RE: Thought for the Day - Apr 14
From: katlaughing
Date: 14 Apr 00 - 02:09 PM

Sorcha,

My mom struggled with how to deal with that, before she died and wound up not putting anyone's name on anything for fear she might hurt our feelings. Not so, her mother, who very carefully labeled everything with a little bit of tape and someone's name on it.

So, we kids did as well as we could in dividing things up. There were many things we just didn't want and wound up giving a lot of them away. That felt better than trying to sell anything.

My kids have been told to let me know what they care about enough to want once I am gone and those things will either be set aside for them or given to them while I am still around and lightening the load. I will find homes for the *stuff* they don't want. I really do not want them to have to wade through piles of papers, treasures, etc., when I am gone. It is tough...some of the things I have, fmaily things, make me want to return to the family roots in Colorado and open an early days museum in a little front parlour!

kat