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Why all this anger?
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Subject: Why all this anger? From: GUEST Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:10 AM It's not a new development here, but I wonder if it's getting worse. This latent anger in so many postings, as if a virulent minority seeks occasion for outrage at every new topic available. Certainly not all participants are venting their rage, and oftentimes Mudcatters strive to keep the tone of the threads tolerant and inclusive. But some hostility seems ready to erupt at any moment, on any thread. Valid questions about the whiteness of many mudcatters--protestant marches--Cat Stevens' imagined actions and affiliations--'apologies' posted for inflammatory purposes; each of these and many others have teetered on the edge of bigotry. Has liberal tolerance become as passe as flower power? Or are petty temper squalls the accepted norm on Internet chat forums? Including myself in all this judgement, can't we do better? |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Big Mick Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:14 AM I'm with you on this one, Guest. You must have been reading my mind. I was looking at my own posts and finding myself thinking that this shit must be contagious. I had just resolved to trying to act in a bit more tolerant fashion and not emulate some of the nastiness I have been seeing. Mudcat is "a pearl of great worth" and its survival depends on us respecting, even when disagreeing, others views. And if they seek their jollies from inciting us to react, and you know who you are, then we just shouldn't play. That was good sauce when I proposed it several years ago and it is better sauce now. Big Mick |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: catspaw49 Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:25 AM Well Guest, funny you should mention that........I'm generally completely off the wall and don't get too irate over anything......Usually just try to laugh it off with some piece of craziness, but lately, one particular member has gotten to me. What's worse is that I've let it roll over into other places as well. I feel you have a good point and its well taken here. Every once in awhile, I think we need a blow-off thread. Kind of a primal scream thing where you can let it all hang out and then go back to some semblance of sanity or insanity, as the case may be. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Roger in Sheffield Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:26 AM for my part it is not anger. Just don't understand the world. Yesterday on the news were bangladeshi women who had been disfigured by acid attacks from rebuffed suitors. It makes me angry only in the sense that such actions are hateful and beyond belief. i have found myself drawn into the Ireland issue mainly cause this is causing hurt to people who use this forum and sound (write) like decent people to me through the last week I have learned a lot and very grateful wiser people pushed me to learn a little more roger |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Dave (the ancient mariner) Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:28 AM With you both. Do not allow anger and personal predjudice spoil the ambience of the Mudcat; to do so demeans and belittles an otherwise fine forum. I doubt if our words will affect the people who fan such activity. To those people of goodwill who do care, please avoid such invective; and keep this place as pleasant as possible. Yours, Aye. Dave |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: GUEST,Giac, not at home Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:34 AM After putting in a sarcastic remark on one of "those" threads the other day, I wished I had not, and vowed to not play any more. Usually I just ignore such things, but got swept up in the moment. Hope I won't again. Thanks, guest, for giving words to the thoughts of many of us. Giac |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Catrin Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:34 AM I am a newbie here. I have picked up on this anger you mention. But over and above everything I have picked up on is warmth and 'welcomingness' (if there is such a word). Or I would not have hung around. I have posted a lyric request and recieved genuine help. I had problems finding HearMe and received genuine help I had problems with my mic and received genuine help I have read some extremely good and witty stuff on the threads.... And so it goes. Thank you everybody Catrin and so it goes. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: dwditty Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:37 AM Frankly, I am as happy as the proverbial pig in sh*t. And, Mick, it'll only get better when you new puter arrives and we can really hear you on Hearme, not that we don't enjoy your right-on-target posts. Where else can you find the joys we have here. Yes, it's been said over and over that we are a community. Well, if we all lived in a physical community, there would still be bickering, hurt feelings, displays of false pride, etc. just like here. Some would even get pissed off and move on. C'est la vie. I, for one, love this place. I love reading what people have to say. I love alternately laughing and crying at 'Spaw's posts. I love the predominant displays of good will (LLoyd, Art, and even me when I needed the emotional support of friends, as well as many others). I love getting personal messages from you. I love sending them. Hearme is fantastic. Believe me, I understand that some very have some very strong emotional feeling about this or that. I know you need to get them out. Go ahead. But, let's please try to do so in a manner that is not hurtful or spiteful. As the song says, "Ac-cent-u-ate the Positive" Now I've got to go learn that one. dw |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: GUEST Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:49 AM Don't ever say something that runs counter to the conventional Mudcat wisdom. Jed Marum will label you a "sick bastard." kat/katlaughing will tell you to "fuck off."
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Big Mick Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:52 AM WARNING: DON'T BITE. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Jeri Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:58 AM Paranoia runs deep Into your life it will creep... The anonymous nasties attempt to sow the seeds of discontent around here, and we can be too willing to let them take root. They drop hints about who they are that point to someone else. Unless we've met someone (and sometimes even if we have) we question our judgement and their civility. We start seeing everyone as real or potential nasty GUEST(s). When I start wondering "what did he/she REALLY mean by that comment," I've got to pull back and wonder why I'm wondering. If they didn't mean what they said, they need to be more clear - I don't need to read meanings into their words. If someone wants to fool me, I don't care. (And it's no fun for them if people believe what they say and then are unaffected when they find out they're wrong. "Oh yeah, whatever...") If people have to assume anonymity in order to make snotty comments, they've got bigger problems than being flamed. I can't do anything about those people, but I can refuse to let them affect my attitude toward and treatment of friends and potential friends here. Just smile and walk past. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: dwditty Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:59 AM right, you are, Mick. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Roger in Sheffield Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:59 AM like Catrin I have had some great help here and perhaps I should shut my big mouth before alienating anyone(else) roger |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: InOBU Date: 15 Jul 00 - 12:32 PM Roger: Never worry about talking too much. Your comments are welcome and as you say, we all learn from each other. When our nations seek to control what we learn, that is the time for us to sound off in spite of those who wish to remain blind in the face of censorship and state terror. We must remember that informed folk musicians have always been the fear of dictators, as seen in the murder of Victor Hara. Good man yerself Roger, best wishes Larry |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 15 Jul 00 - 12:59 PM Anger has its place. But crossness and irritability are different, and they are a waste of time. And suggesting that there are some topics we ought to leave alone and tiptoe out of the room, that really is bullshit. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: bbelle Date: 15 Jul 00 - 01:15 PM I can address this issue of anger from a very personal standpoint. Is it not true that we rale at those we are most comfortable with and know instinctively they care about us? Is it not true that we do this because, to address the real cause of the anger, would be to hammer the last nail? Aristotle: "Anybody can become angry, that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way, that is not within everybody's power and is not easy." Anger is a natural emotion and to suppress it is very dangerous. Obsessive anger is another whole issue. Some of the anger expressed in the forum, I can understand and even can relate to it, sometimes. Some, I don't understand, at all, and wonder if the individual is just sitting around "gettin' angry." We have made the mudcat cafe into a real life community, with real life issues and situations. In so doing, we must accept the anger with the laughter. And, there is that inclination to say, at times ... "Jenny Lind, go back an close that door properly." moonchild |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Bill D Date: 15 Jul 00 - 01:24 PM folks, we all have buttons ...some of them are on hair-triggers, and it is NOT easy to tell how that happened. I am more & more beginning to think it is genetic...VERY nice and reasonable people will go off like sky rockets at some situations.
Mine are
oh, yeah.*grin*.. So why am I angry? Because it offends me. Why do I usually control myself and NOT hit, scream, or pout?....Who knows? Why are some of you more gentle souls who would rather lurk or leave than get involved in these threads?*shrug*... I say again as I have before....It is amazing that THIS group just keeps plodding along rather than self-destruct under the recurring balderdash! |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: dwditty Date: 15 Jul 00 - 02:12 PM Let me switch gears. I just got in from doing some errands. As I was driving I saw an elderly couple (mid to late 70's) coming up the side walk. The old man could barely shuffle along with his cane. They were, however, holding hadns and smiling at each other. Just as I approached them, they turned to each other, embraced, and kissed as tenderly as I have ever seen anywhere. I smiled. Just thought we could use a little change of pace. Look around, people. dw |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: katlaughing Date: 15 Jul 00 - 02:20 PM It would be nice if those who have been so angry lately would confine it to one blowout thread instead of smattering it around all over the place. Maybe we need an Anger Therapy Thread all of its own. Personally I would like to see more people be totally honest about what and whom they are angry with. The innuendos throughout the threads just crank up the paranoia and flaming. Oh, yeah, and fawk off if ya don't agree....**BSEG** |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Sourdough Date: 15 Jul 00 - 02:27 PM I used not to look at he source of a post before I read it so that I would judge it on its own merit. Now, because of the plethora (isn't that a great word? "Come see the Giant Plethora") of angry, small-minded posts, I now first read from whom the post originated. If it is from "Guest", I am forewarned that there is a good possibility that someone who does not want to be associated with what he or she is saying, has sent this message. "Guest" is a warning that it's possible that this message is something the writer is ashamed of writing; it's purpose is to upset. Sure, sometimes the Guests turn out to be Mudcatters who've temporarily lost their cookies but that small inconvenience is better than reading nauseous messages, unprepared. In any case, the attacks from "Guest" no longer are as annoying to me as they once were. Sourdough |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: McGrath of Harlow Date: 15 Jul 00 - 02:43 PM "Thread Rage" - there's supposed to be a practice in some Japanese companies of having a room somewhere in te building where there's crockery provided and so forth; and when then stresses and the strains get too much, you go along and smash a few plates, or break up the furniture. Then you come out ready to be polite and charming the rest of the day.
I sometimes feel there are people who use the Internet this way. And we just get the mild end of it in the Mudcat.
Some people work off the rage playing pointless smash-em-up computer games. Maybe soon there will be comoputer programs that enable you to have a pointless quarrel, instead still think there's a place for contrivwersy and disagreement, and even anger. But anger intended to do something is a world away from crossness and irritability and rage, where it's just a mood. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: katlaughing Date: 15 Jul 00 - 03:21 PM I know this topic has been beaten to death lately, but something needs to be said. Lackadaisical pissants speak in order to conceal -- or at least to veil -- their thoughts. Let us note first of all that Councilmember Thread Creep's threats are not an abstract problem. They have very concrete, immediate, and unpleasant consequences. For instance, Councilmember Creep has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to twist the teaching of history to suit his foul unforgiving purposes. On all of these occasions, I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that he tries to make us think the way he wants us to think, not by showing us evidence and reasoning with us, but by understanding how to push our emotional buttons. I'll try not to dwell on this, but I'm willing to accept that we must speak neither of the past nor of the far future but rather focus on the here and now, specifically on the daunting matter of Councilmember Creep's wicked ethics. I'm even willing to accept that his notions have earned him opprobrium, suspicion, resentment, and hatred. But he claims that he acts in the public interest. I respond that some deep void within Councilmember Creep makes it necessary for him to foster suspicion -- if not hatred -- of "outsiders". On rare occasions, in order to preserve their liberties, sometimes people must contravene decency. Councilmember Creep does that even when his liberties aren't being threatened. Now for some parting advice: Look at the facts. Analyze the arguments. Think about the motives of the people who are telling you that everyone and everything discriminates against Councilmember Thread Creep -- including the writing on the bathroom stalls. And have confidence in yourself. Remember, Councilmember Creep's prophecies oscillate between malignant separatism and unprincipled Maoism. just a bit of fun from a source we've used around here before: Complaint Letter Generator
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: Lepus Rex Date: 15 Jul 00 - 04:15 PM Hehe, that complaint generator is great. I just sent off a letter to the local city council, muaha. Back to the subject, though... I'm pretty new here, but already I've done a couple of angry posts. I try NOT to respond to things that really piss me off, and when I do, I try to remove the more inflammatory parts before submitting the message. Still, like I said, I do respond to them, and by doing that, I'm sure that I occaisionally piss someone else off. Hard not to, really. Maybe I just need some practice... ---Lepus Rex |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: GUEST,Geist Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:29 PM One obvious reason being some of the hurtful, racist and just downright dumbshit postings lately- when someone is being an asshole, he/she should probably be told so. No? Or should we just nod & smile like good little lobotomized automotons? Sometimes the 'PC' everyone's-opinion-is-equally-valid-there-is-no-such-thing-as-historical-fact bullshit gets a little deep & hard to take. |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: GUEST Date: 15 Jul 00 - 10:34 PM "Maybe soon there will be comoputer programs that enable you to have a pointless quarrel" (So sayeth McGrath There certainly seem to be websites that that offer the same accomodation! |
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Subject: RE: Why all this anger? From: GUEST,Ewan McVicar Date: 16 Jul 00 - 04:00 AM The reason I disappear periodically from Mudcat is because some remark or value stance has so appalled me I don't want to be associated with a place such things are said in. The reason I come back periodically is I hope the people who need to say such things have pushed off, or else maybe I can pick my way around them. For a while I do manage to stay out of their way, but eventually our paths cross again, and rather than tell them what I think of them - which does my feelings no good, and seems to please rather than tober them - I leave again. It is nice to be here, for the time being. |
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