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Lyr Req/Add: If You Wanna Be Happy

Related threads:
Lyr Req: Always Marry an Ugly Girl (42)
Lyr Req: Always Marry an Ugly Girl (26)
Lyr Req: Get an ugly girl to marry you (15)
Lyr Req: Always Marry an Ugly Girl (15) (closed)


GUEST,joe b. 14 Sep 00 - 11:52 PM
Lonesome EJ 15 Sep 00 - 12:28 AM
The Beanster 15 Sep 00 - 01:06 AM
The Beanster 15 Sep 00 - 01:22 AM
Lonesome EJ 15 Sep 00 - 12:25 PM
Lepus Rex 15 Sep 00 - 02:46 PM
mousethief 15 Sep 00 - 02:55 PM
Lepus Rex 15 Sep 00 - 03:11 PM
mousethief 15 Sep 00 - 03:17 PM
The Beanster 16 Sep 00 - 04:23 AM
GUEST,joe b. 16 Sep 00 - 07:55 AM
The Lighthouse 16 Sep 00 - 11:11 PM
mousethief 18 Sep 00 - 11:50 AM
The Lighthouse 18 Sep 00 - 10:47 PM
The Beanster 19 Sep 00 - 05:14 AM
mousethief 19 Sep 00 - 11:22 AM
The Beanster 20 Sep 00 - 11:12 PM
GUEST,dirdin 09 Jan 11 - 08:51 AM
GUEST,. 21 May 17 - 10:02 PM
Joe_F 22 May 17 - 06:27 PM
GUEST,Phil d'Conch 23 May 17 - 08:25 PM
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Subject: If you wanna be happy
From: GUEST,joe b.
Date: 14 Sep 00 - 11:52 PM

Does anyone have the words (complete)to this song?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 12:28 AM

sorry Joe,just the chorus

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

That the one?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Beanster
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 01:06 AM

Love this song! By Jimmy Soul Click


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Subject: Lyr Add: IF YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY FOR THE REST...
From: The Beanster
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 01:22 AM

No, no. Wait a second. I just re-read those lyrics and some are not quite right. Here it is:

IF YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE

If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

(Repeat Chorus)

A pretty woman makes a man look small
And very often causes his downfall
As soon as he marries her then she starts
To do the things that will break his heart

But if you make an ugly woman your wife
You'll be happy for the rest of your life
An ugly woman cooks your meals on time
She'll always give you peace of mind

(Chorus)

Don't let your friends say you have no taste
Go ahead and marry anyway
Though her face is ugly, her eyes don't match
Take it from me, she's a better catch

(Chorus)

(Spoken)
"Say man, I saw your wife the other day!"
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, and she is ugleeeeeee!"
"Yeah, she's ugly but she sure can cook, baby!"

Oh my gosh, these lyrics are appalling!


    Note from Joe Offer: The Great Song Thesaurus says that "If You Wanna Be Happy" was written in 1963 by Frank J. Guida, Carmela Guida, and Joseph Royster. The Harry Fox Agency Website (hfa.com) confirms the songwriter names and says the song was recorded by Jimmy Soul and by Kid Creole and the Coconuts.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 12:25 PM

Appalling yes,but a boon to ugly women in the early 60s when it was released.Statistics for the marriage rate for ugly women went through the roof.Homely and plain women also saw significant gains.It took nearly three full years for pretty women to regain their former stature of dominance.Ugly men were unaffected,while ugly men with lots of money continued to lead the male category.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 02:46 PM

I hated this song 'til I actually listened to the lyrics earlier this year. Before that, I never listened past "If you want to be happy for the rest of your life... blah blah blah" before I turned it off. I like it now, for some reason.

I hate listening to people sing it, though. They never seem to know the lyrics. Even the dj of the local crappy 99%-white-loser-oldies-music station was singing "Never make a pretty woman your wife..." as "Better make a pretty woman your wife." Fools! Maybe I should print this thread out and send it to that station... :)

---Lepus Rex


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: mousethief
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 02:55 PM

This is sort of related to the "do tits book bands?" thread. How many guys would marry a woman whom they didn't think beautiful? I had a friend who would claimed he would not marry a woman unless he thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. What if he married her and then another, more beautiful woman came along? Would he divorce the first one and run after the second?

This kind of thinking makes women think men are shallow.

The thing about "she's ugly but she sure can cook" really brings up a point that we all know but refuse to acknowledge: good looking people don't need to work on their other traits nearly as much, and can skate by on looks (until things start to sag; but then there's always cosmetic surgery, right?). People who aren't so great looking in the eyes of "society" have to work on their personalities and their skills and such in order to "attract" people the way really good-looking people do merely by their looks.

Wish it weren't this way, but somebody has to report the sad, sad truth.

Click on the mouse-- you can see that my wife and I aren't the world's most glamorous persons (even in formalwear!). But we love each other and don't expect each other to be super-gorgeous (or super-rich) and that's okay.

Besides I fell in love with her over the internet and didn't know what she looked like until my heart was irretrievably gone.... So even if she were ugly (which she isn't, as you can see, although she thinks she is), it wouldn't have mattered.

Alex
O..O
=o=


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 03:11 PM

Mousethief, well, your wife is ok. I mean, the facial hair is a little thick, and she towers over you wearing men's clothes, but I'd say she's an awfully 'handsome' woman.

And you, next to her... Aren't you a pretty little fella, with those earrings and... a dress? In fact, you look EXACTLY like a woman... (no offense)

Uhhhh... Oh, wait a minute...


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: mousethief
Date: 15 Sep 00 - 03:17 PM

LOL!

Alex
O..O
=o=


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Beanster
Date: 16 Sep 00 - 04:23 AM

mousethief--

That's such a nice posting. It's sweet. One of my ex-boyfriends always thought he was not-so-good-looking but what he never quite "got" was that he didn't have to be gorgeous. He just had to be gorgeous to me. And he was.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: GUEST,joe b.
Date: 16 Sep 00 - 07:55 AM

I would like to thank all of you with my search for lyrics to this song. The song does have lyrics that may be misconstrued, however, it may have had positive, cognizant results as well. Once again ..Thanks!!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Lighthouse
Date: 16 Sep 00 - 11:11 PM

Just another blatant put down song that the "oldies" are infamous for. "Under my Thumb" by the Stones is another.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: mousethief
Date: 18 Sep 00 - 11:50 AM

Lighthouse, I have to disagree. The tone of the two songs is worlds apart. The Stones song is very domineering and triumphalistic whereas the Jimmy Soul song is happy and cheerful. He LOVES his ugly wife, whereas you have no indication that the persona of the Stones song has anything but contempt for his "girlfriend."

Alex
O..O
=o=


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Lighthouse
Date: 18 Sep 00 - 10:47 PM

Yes but it's kinda degrading to women in general. What's with those lines "Yeah she's ugly but she sure can cook". Kinda low humor don't you think? It's not really a song praising ugly women, it's a song about not being able to trust a pretty one.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Beanster
Date: 19 Sep 00 - 05:14 AM

mousethief, the guy doesn't actually say he loves his ugly wife--he just says she can cook, has his (his!) meals ready on time and figures she won't cheat on him cuz she's so ugly, nobody else would want her. Although I admit, I really like this song because of its catchy tune and light-hearted mood, when you look at these lyrics, they aren't very nice. At least if he said, "Yeah, she's ugly on the outside but she's beautiful on the inside" or something like that, it would make it a little better. This guy doesn't know what a wife is. He thinks she's a waitress.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: mousethief
Date: 19 Sep 00 - 11:22 AM

Waitresses don't cook. Cooks do. Waitresses just deliver it to your table. YOu need to eat out more often. (grin)

Yeah, I see your point, Beanster. But like you say it's a catchy tune and light-hearted. It's hard work to really hate it.

Alex
O..O
=o=


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req: If you wanna be happy
From: The Beanster
Date: 20 Sep 00 - 11:12 PM

mousethief, come over here and let me tweak your whiskers, you! lol


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Subject: RE: req/ADD: If You Wanna Be Happy
From: GUEST,dirdin
Date: 09 Jan 11 - 08:51 AM

Hey,

I know and favorize the song "From A Logical Point Of View" sung by the actor Robert Mitchum in his 1957 album "Calypso-Is Like So...".

Best wishes

dirdin


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req/Add: If You Wanna Be Happy
From: GUEST,.
Date: 21 May 17 - 10:02 PM

In the DT.....

www.mudcat.org/@displaysong.cfm?SongID=3546 (Lemon Tree)


What's the connection? -Joe Offer, Mudcat Music Editor-


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req/Add: If You Wanna Be Happy
From: Joe_F
Date: 22 May 17 - 06:27 PM

From a letter to a friend, 1981:

...The whole
notion of attractiveness is one of nature's most transparent cheats.
Sensible people decide whether to get close to each other according to
the pleasure they can reasonably hope to give each other when they are
close, _not_ according to the pleasure they happen to give each other
at a distance. The two are very poorly correlated. (Note in this
connection that _attractive_ & _repulsive_ are not good opposites. It
is a good bet that anything unpleasant will be less so at a greater
distance. It is a bad bet that anything pleasant will be more so at a
smaller distance.) Cheat back! Look at the rose, but eat the apple.

...

There are two special causes for hopefulness in applying these ideas
to sexuality. One is that tho not everyone can be a rose, almost
everyone can be an apple: the things that matter most after you have
taken your glasses off are more easily altered to suit the customer
than the more or less standardized displays. The other is that
nature, if cheated gallantly enough, is a good loser: those who have
given you sexual or other pleasure actually start looking better as a
result, even at a distance.

What is "sexual attraction" anyway, that we should respect it so
much at the cost of so much misery? Some of it (e.g. tits & ass, i
suspect) is wired in genetically & is almost wholly arbitrary -- once
it got started, it was selected for because it was selected for
because etc.; sex is like that. Some of it is mere social convention,
& some is a mixture (e.g., i imagine society determines what counts as
a signal of high status, but genetics makes high status as such
attractive). But all of it is remarkably plastic, and our usual
failure to mold it according to reason is only another reminder that
wherever sex is concerned we must expect concentrations, not only of
what is beautiful, but also of what is cruel, gratuitous, &
preposterous.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Req/Add: If You Wanna Be Happy
From: GUEST,Phil d'Conch
Date: 23 May 17 - 08:25 PM

Joe Offer: "...written in 1963 by Frank J. Guida, Carmela Guida, and Joseph Royster." and here:

thread.cfm?threadid=116856#2512073

As noted, the lyrics are adapted/appropriated from Ugly Woman by Trinidad calypsonian Hubert Raphael Charles (1908 – 1999) (aka: Rafael De Leon; Roaring Lion). Swing your Euro-American moral compasses as you see fit. It was at least three decades old with maybe two dozen covers before the Guidas got a hold of it in 1963 at the peak of the pop folk scare and put their 'Norfolk Sound' stamp on it.

Frank Guida (1922 - 2007) was assigned to the (white) U.S.O. Club in Port of Spain, Trinidad for most of World War II. This was the same venue a USO touring Morey Amsterdam is alleged to have picked up on L'Année Passée (Rum and Coca-Cola) and some accounts even have Guida as a bit player in that fiasco as well. He ran the two biggest record stores in Norfolk, VA, USA for donkey years.

Frank's wife Millie Guida (1924 - 2008) was generally credited for bulk of the Americanized lyrics. She was a great cook and gorgeous and funny. Oh well!


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