Lyr Add: THE KENNEBUNKPORT HILLBILLY (parody)

Subject: Lyr Add: THE KENNEBUNKPORT HILLBILLY
From: Susan from California
Date: 23 Jan 01 - 11:54 PM

With apologies to DougR and others...this came to my email today, I have no idea who wrote it...

Sung to the tune of "The Beverly Hillbillies."

Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy name Bush.
His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.
He drank like a fish while he drove all about.
But that didn't matter 'cuz his daddy bailed him out.
DUI, that is. Criminal record. Cover-up.

Well, the first thing you know little Georgie goes to Yale.
He can't spell his name but they never let him fail.
He spends all his time hangin' out with student folk.
And that's when he learns how to snort a line of coke.
Blow, that is. White gold. Nose candy.

The next thing you know there's a war in Vietnam.
Kin folks say, "George, stay at home with Mom."
Let the common people get maimed and scarred.
We'll buy you a spot in the Texas Air Guard.
Cushy, that is. Country clubs. Nose candy.

Twenty years later George gets a little bored.
He trades in the booze, says that Jesus is his Lord.
He said, "Now the White House is the place I wanna be.
So he called his daddy's friends and they called the GOP.
Gun owners, that is. Falwell. Jesse Helms.

Come November 7, the election ran late.
Kin folks said "Jeb, give the boy your state!"
"Don't let those colored folks get into the polls."
So they put up barricades so they couldn't punch their holes.
Chads, that is. Duval County. Miami-Dade.

Before the votes were counted five Supremes stepped in.
Told all the voters "Hey, we want George to win."
"Stop counting votes!" was their solemn invocation.
And that's how George finally got his coronation.
Rigged, that is. Illegitimate. No moral authority.

Y'all come vote now. Ya hear?

---

Line Breaks added JoeClone

Subject: RE: BS: Bush/Beverly Hillbillies parody
From: Poo-Twa
Date: 24 Jan 01 - 12:18 AM

BlueJay here, at Poo-Twa's house. That's a good one, Susan. I can picture the ducks running around on the White House lawn already. The only thing I can't figure out: Is Dubya playing the part of Uncle Jed, or Jethro?

BTW, it was me, in the "Bushwhacked" thread, who brought up the horrid thought of W possibly being the Prez for two terms. Don't know what I was thinking, except perhaps a fond rememberance of eight years of Reagan being fodder for comedians. However, the damage is still not completely undone, and it looks to me that it may well get worse, before people finally wake the fuck up. I shouldn't have brought it up, and you were entirely correct in poxing me. Cheers, BlueJay

Subject: RE: BS: Bush/Beverly Hillbillies parody
From: Lepus Rex
Date: 24 Jan 01 - 08:34 AM

I like it. >:) But Bush has to be Jethro. Jed's a good guy, and not stupid, just uneducated. But Jethro even looks like a Bush...

---Lepus Rex

Subject: RE: BS: Bush/Beverly Hillbillies parody
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 24 Jan 01 - 08:46 AM

Dang, wish I could find the lyrics to John Boy & Billy's "The Candidates Went Down To Florida".