Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways

Subject: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: JedMarum
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 11:47 AM

Years ago when my boss was trying to convince me I should bring in a consultant friend of his on a computer project I aksed him, "What if we get him in here and I don't like him?" ... and he said, "Well, the door swings both ways," meaning we could change our mind and get rid of him. We never had to, I liked the guy and his work was helpful, BUT I always remember that phrase. Now, when I'm looking at any decision - I remember most decisions can be reversed if need be.

Well this is by long way of explanation, but it was only 10 days ago that I proudly announced my decision to take a gig with a country band, and dedicate my efforts on behalf of the "Nashville Star Making Machinery" (thanks for that great expression Joni). Now I'm back here, tail between my legs saying - "I've changed my mind!" I quit the country gig. (Rick - your words were prophetic, just quicker then either of us thought)!

It was an interesting experience, and I worked hard with them for actually about 3 weeks, and really enjoyed working with such fine musicians - but at the end of the day, I just couldn't work that hard on music I don't love. The labor of love required to put up with the Star Making Path to Success just wasn't there for me. So I gracefully bowed out this week, gave notice and will finish up with them on Thurs evening. Thankfully my wonderful friends at Eammons Kitchen were willing to take me back, and I was able to get a few of my dates re-established (can you believe I had actually cancelled my entire calendar beyond April - what was I thinking). At any rate - I joked with the country folks, after I gave my notice, and after we had gotten over the "wailing and gnashing of teeth" stage - "I could be at the top of the Celtic or Folk charts and still have to keep a day job, but that's where my heart is."

I guess I need to be more careful about making such sweeping announcements, in the future ;-) but I suppose no real harm was done ... just a bit of egg on my face!

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: catspaw49
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 11:58 AM

Don't see any egg at all my friend.....must be you that sees it huh?

In the early 80's I left the company I was with, packed up and headed for a great new job in a wonderful new place. I'd been recruited by them, they promised the moon, it was a sweet deal. dove to the new place, took two days, and all the trip I kept getting wary.......of what I have no idea. When I got about 20 miles away, I turned around and went home, took the house off the market, and called them and said "No thanks." They were confused, but so was I.

My previous Fortune 500 actually took me back AND gave me a better position which led to a tremendous phase of my life. I couldn't get into the other company thing for some reason, and that U-Turn changed my entire life. Five years later I met Karen and I wouldn't have been there had I followed the other course.

Who knows Jed my friend.......Fate is a funny thing and for whatever reason things happen, you gotta' lead with your heart.......and follow it as well. Glad to have you back around here too!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Wesley S
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 11:59 AM

Welcome back Jed - Yahoooo....

We would rather see you here in town than on the TV anyway.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:15 PM

Hey Jed, no wonder my words were "prophetic"...I'm THE KING of WRONG DIRECTIONS!

In the sixties, I felt too shy to have faith in my own (folk oriented music) and went into bars (where no one really pays attention) WRONG DIRECTION!

In the seventies, I signed with RCA, knowing full well they saw me as a "Canadian Roger Whittaker" (Ughh!) WRONG DIRECTION!

In the eighties I put out a Country album, and released several country singles, knowing full well I wouldn't be able to fulfill my management's expectaions of year-round touring of "Country bars" (the worst venues in the world as far as I was concerned) WRONG DIRECTION!

After passing the age of 43 (and having learned to hate the music I played to make a living), I met Sandy Paton. He knew I loved folk music and thought I had something to offer...to Folk-Legacy even!

Finally, after 25 years...the RIGHT DIRECTION! Haven't regretted one minute of it since then. You're on the right path my friend...the heart ALWAYS knows...even when the head gives it an arguement!

Rick

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Rowana (at work)
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:25 PM

No egg for you. You are eligible to wear the "willing to try something new" badge. So it didn't work out. The important thing is that you tried. Welcome back.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Bill D
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:25 PM

...gee, wonder what would have happened if I had practiced hard enough to be able to CHOOSE a direction! *wry smile*

It does my heart good to see someone make that kind of choice...there are too many out there now who are NOT doing what their heart says, and it shows...

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Kim C
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:34 PM

Jed, sometimes you just have to try it out first. If you hadn't at least given it a shot you'd be kicking yourself later. Personally I'd rather kick myself for things I did rather than the things I wanted to do but didn't. :)

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Mooh
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:44 PM

Jed, I'm proud of you, and myself because what you did confirms my own such behavior as right and good. Sometimes our instincts should be allowed to govern us. Twice in my life I've allowed those instincts to take over and both times there was a short period of readjustment followed by a better life. Once had to do with a relationship and the other with a job. In both cases I know I would have missed alot of life and opportunities had I not acted instinctively.

You made the right choice. Lesson learned, but no egg.

Mooh.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: wysiwyg
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 12:58 PM

What I see is a man always moving forward. It was a step forward to try it, and it's not a step back now-- it's another one forward.

The time you spent pursuing this will probably turn out to have been important to some future endeavor.

~S~

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: kendall
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:23 PM

If you are not happy in what you are doing, you are doing the wrong thing no matter how much they pay you.In Greek mythology, Hermes will kick your ass if you are not doing what your soul wants you to do. Sooner or later, you will get the message and change course.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Matt Woodbury/Mimosa
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:45 PM

Jed, I'm really embarrassed that I missed this whole drama while I was off doing Massenet & Verdi. I'm glad you'll still be around though. You're still on the car stereo. Hope to get to hear you live soon. YOBB on the 21st?

Mimosa

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Mrrzy
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:50 PM

"No egg for you. You are eligible to wear the "willing to try something new" badge. So it didn't work out. The important thing is that you tried. Welcome back. " - to this, let me add, that GETTING OUT OF IT as quickly as you did, rather than feeling that you "had" to stay since you'd tried it, shows even more smarts and courage and all that than trying it did in the first place. Definitely, this door goes forward, you didn't come back to where you were, you are ahead of where you were. Bully for you!

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: SINSULL
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:51 PM

Jed,
95% of the world stays right where it is because they are afraid of making a mistake or (more likely) too comfortable to be willing to take a chance. I admire your ability to take a chance. And even more, I admire your ability to say "No. This isn't what I want." Both took a lot of courage. If you've got eggs, make egg salad or lemonmade or something like that. They certainly don't belong on your face.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: SINSULL
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:52 PM

lemonade - damn lisp.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Jim the Bart
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 01:56 PM

At least that's a wrong direction you'll never have to consider again. Sometimes, when you don't take that chance, you waste way too much time wondering about it.

Didja have some fun? Didja meet some good people? Didja learn anything? Didja get any good stories? Didja lose anything you can't replace? If you can answer "yep" to any of the first four and "nope" to the last one, it was well worth it. If "nope" fits all, chalk it up to experience. If only that last one's true, that's a problem.

Congratulations on going. Congratulations on coming back. That swinging door could have hit ya in the *ss going both ways, you know.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 03:17 PM

Congratulations, Jed Marum. You sound like a wise person to me.

Carol

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Justa Picker
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 04:00 PM

I guess in the end you have to be true to yourself and your personal integrity, ideals, and your goals and ambitions within the music business. If this reversal of decision gives you peace of mind; helps you sleep better at night; and allows you to do what you truly love to do, then you've made the right decision.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Hollowfox
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 04:50 PM

You did the right thing, and you did it well (bowing out gracefully, not leaving the group on the lurch). I salute you.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: dwditty
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 05:32 PM

Like I always say, "There's a piece of gold in every pile of shit." Sound like you'll appreciate where are now even more than before. All good wishes.

dw

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Seamus Kennedy
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 10:37 PM

Jed, you didn't make a mistake. You tried something different to further your musical career. It didn't work, so you went back to doing what you love. The mistake would have been to stick with the new group knowing that you hate every minute of it. Wise moves both times!

Seamus

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: katlaughing
Date: 14 Feb 01 - 10:51 PM

Good for you, Jed. Never does to stick with something our heart isn't into...an experience is usefull as long as we can learn something from it and it certainly sounds as though you learned from this one...follow your heart and be happy...and, thanks for coming back to tell us.

kat

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: JedMarum
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 02:07 AM

I love this place. Thanks all for the good thoughts and comments. I am humbled, and greatful.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: mkebenn
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 07:14 AM

You can't know if the broth is too salty without tasting it. We need you on this side of the fence. Mike

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: LR Mole
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 09:26 AM

"There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be." Including, and especially, here.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: folk1234
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 09:35 AM

Just think. If sometime in the future you find yourself in one of these "rut" folk song circles, you can change the pace by singing and playing a good ole, shit-kickin', tobacco-chewin', woman-loosin', bar-brawlin', Nashville star-makin', tune.
Welcome back aboard, Jeb!

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: bbelle
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 02:05 PM

I hope you won't be fearful of taking the next opportunity that presents itself. You never know. It may be the right one.

"Life" isn't all it's cracked up to be. "Living" is.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: catspaw49
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 02:37 PM

I will personally shoot the next sumbitch that cranks out yet another cliche from the "Philosophy of Car Bumpers."

Yeah Jed..........we all love ya' man!!! Just remember that "Shit Happens"...............uh............oh, no........................click....BLAM......thwump........................

Spaw ... R.I.P.

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: bbelle
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 03:20 PM

Catspaw: To whom are you referring?

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: catspaw49
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 04:12 PM

Well Bluebelle, if I gotta' explain 'em, they ain't funny! (:<))

Spaw

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: Greyeyes
Date: 15 Feb 01 - 04:13 PM


"This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Though canst not then be false to any man."

Subject: RE: Change Direction - Door Swings Both Ways
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jan 09 - 01:33 PM

but women are fair game.