equinox: consensus v extremism

Subject: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: greg stephens
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 06:12 AM

Far too much tim round here is spent discussingwinter and summer solstice celebrations, and as far as I am concerned enough has been said on the subject. For agreeable people like myself, these silly pagan leftovers will now be cancelled and replaced with a sensible, middle of the road celebrationof the equinoxes: the first will be held tomorrow throughout the world.
The temperture will be adequate, nether too hot or two cold, and the days will be nether too long or too short, to avoid any arguments about which is better. Sex will be had in moderation, but not out in the woods, or tuckedup in bed, Probably on the porch would besuitable, or if this presents a neghbour problem, downstairs in the sitting room. And only with your lawful spouse. Drinking will be encouraged, but only shandy or low-alcohol Italian fruity wines.
Music is a difficult one: I think what wouldbe best would be no traditional folk, or noisy rock and roll or rap. Probably James Taylor songs would be appropriate, or white gospel. But only on CD, not live. Movies on video will be watched, but only those starring Tom Hanks.Political parties will not hold contrary opinions (actually, this seems to havebeen generally implemented already).Municipal firework displays will happen, but not with anything that goes too high or too loud. Bonfires are encouraged, but ingredients are limited to two of those bags ofkindling you can buy in garages.
There will be ABSOLUTELY NO sacrificing of virgins: one or two people of moderate sexual experience in the 30-45 age-group may be tied up and tickled for a few minutes.
This is the blueprint for tomorrow, world wide. Obviously other input of ideas is encouraged, and different traditions will develop over the years. Let the celebrations commence at midnight!!!

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: songs2play
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 07:02 AM

Is the mandatory wearing of kaftans being enforced again ?

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: greg stephens
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 07:10 AM

Far too divisive, kaftans. They can annoy people. I'm not a fashion expert, but Iwould say sort of beige/ fawn cavalry twills type trousers for men.Need advice on appropriate costume for women. Perhaps something unisex could be devised, but not with any past connoations like kaftans.

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: songs2play
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 10:11 AM

Ponchos and pink flares sound just the type of thing.

Also I would suggest the age for the people of moderate sexual expirience, should be raised to 49 and three quarters. There is no immediate specific reason for this, that springs to mind, it's just that it's a nice round figure.

With regards to pastimes, the playing of Twister should be completely banned, unless the Dutch Rules are used. But the bouncing on a Space Hopper should be actively encouraged.

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: Bert
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 02:37 PM

Well dammit, I'm too old to be tied up and tickled.

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: DMcG
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 02:46 PM

I like to rise when the sun's well risen
Round about mid morning
I like to watch watch the morning news
And the weather fore-cast

And hurrah for the life of the urban man
When it not a silly solstice day

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: smallpiper
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 03:05 PM

We stopped sacrificing virgins in Hull a long time ago - we couldn't find any! So we started raiding grimsby but there wern't any there either. It has been said that in some parts of hull the females have a higher sperm count than the males - clever round here you know!

Anyway back to the point oh there wasn't one ah well never mind hum di hum di hum.........

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: artbrooks
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 06:33 PM

Would you consider allowing Jackie Chan movies? And is Real Ale permissable, or are we all stuck with Bud Light for the day?

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: GUEST,Mudlark
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 09:13 PM

If kaftans are too kontroversial, may I suggest a comfy alternative for the distaff side. Muu muus, not to be confused with MaoMaos or MouMous, in tasteful colors might be appropriate.

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 10:23 PM

Bouncing on Space Hoppers is a bit controversial surely.

Subject: RE: equinox: consensus v extremism
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Sep 02 - 11:05 PM

Space Hoppers? Well, I'm a fairly liberal guy in that regard --I don't mind bouncing on them if they know their place. And I certainly wouldn't want my sister to marry one.

A