BS: Dangerous animals

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:56 AM

Bears (not beers) are dangerous. One showed up in my neighborhood on Monday - a residential area. The police had a tranquilizer gun but no one knew how to use it (scary, no?) so they killed it.
I rather like bees.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:36 AM

bee-nine is a vitamin! The one to watch out for is bee-damned!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: GUEST
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:29 AM

While they may sting you, I've always thought of them as quite Beenign :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Jackie in the Green
Date: 20 May 04 - 10:00 AM

I dedicate this song to the late bee, so cruelly robbed of his little life, and to jOhn, who I'm sure, loved the bee carnally.

Eric the Half a Bee, by Eric Idle and John Cleese.

Half a bee, philosophically,
Must, ipso facto, half not be.
But half the bee has got to be
Vis a vis, its entity. D'you see?

But can a bee be said to be
Or not to be an entire bee
When half the bee is not a bee
Due to some ancient injury?

La dee dee, one two three,
Eric the half a bee.
A B C D E F G,
Eric the half a bee.

Is this wretched demi-bee,
Half-asleep upon my knee,
Some freak from a menagerie?
No! It's Eric the half a bee!

Fiddle de dum, Fiddle de dee,
Eric the half a bee.
Ho ho ho, tee hee hee,
Eric the half a bee.

I love this hive, employee-ee,
Bisected accidentally,
One summer afternoon by me,
I love him carnally.

He loves him carnally,
Semi-carnally.

And in the immortal words of the great John Shuttleworth:

Go down on your knee to the honey bee
For she is very nice,
Before you hit her with a rolled up Mirror,
Think twice,
How will that bee's mother feel
When she finds out her child is a ghost,
Kill the bee,
And ultimately,
You'll have nothing to spread on your toast.

Think on jOhn.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Raptor
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:44 AM

New commandment "thou shall not kill(unless you get the hee-bee-gee-bees)"

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Raptor
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:38 AM

I hate to say it but that is the quintesential wimpyness you pussy!

Afraid of someting that is smaller than yer thumbnail!

Get a helmut!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 May 04 - 09:26 AM

Wasps, bees, spiders... Hah!!! Forget 'em! Ladybugs! Now there's something to be afraid of!!! Sure, they don't bite and they're cute and they eat aphids and all that goody stuff, but that's the trouble. Nobody ever kills ladybugs so they just keep multiplying and multiplying and before you know it there are so many of them that they outweigh the rest of the entire planet and that causes the Earth to shift in its orbit and go crashing into the Sun which causes the Sun to explode into a giant Nova destroying the rest of the planets in the Solar System and leaving our part of the Universe uninhabitable to every race except Vogons for millions of years.

Ladybugs! Yechhhh!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:46 AM

for those with allergies to bee or wasp venom having one loose in a room is no joking matter.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:40 AM

Another splendid try jOhn, but it didn't work. I suggest you try a thread entitled "Animals that aren't dangerous in the least".

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:39 AM

Big fat hairy bumblebees are the worst.

I agree with jOhn, where I come from we don't capture insects in boxes to release them again outside - we squash them. And fly-swatters are not meant for gently coaxing flies away - they are for swatting the bejeesus out of them. And those sticky papers etc are not there for decoration.

My son emigrated to Australia. The first time I visited he said "Dad, sorry, you can't sleep in the guest room". "Why?" I enquired; he replied "Last night we found there a white-tailed-something-or-other spider, for which there is no anti-venom. The trouble is, they go in pairs, and we only found the one...". I tell you, I nearly headed for the airport there and then.

And mozzies too. They annoy like hell during the night, give you itchy bites, perhaps something nasty along with that also. Do I get up in the night with a little plastic box to capture it and release it outside?

Like hell I do.

But I like to think myself as humane too. So I bought an electric insect zapper. It has an ultraviolet light to attract them towards a mesh with high voltage. Stick it outside, and you can have your beer or BBQ in the summer evenings without being molested by insects. The zapping sound can be offputting, I grant you that. But it's quick.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: GUEST
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:35 AM

stobor

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 20 May 04 - 08:11 AM

And what about ants, harken the story of ' Squatter and the Ant ' by
Derek and Clive.
Very dangerous.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: ced2
Date: 20 May 04 - 06:31 AM

Llamas are fearsome animals... Mr Python had a item showing the valour of people who had to keep them under control.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 20 May 04 - 02:16 AM

i bet all them animal rights people will start moaning now, but i;m not bothred, beees are to dangerous to take chances with.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: GUEST
Date: 20 May 04 - 02:08 AM

To bee or not to bee, that is Johns question.

Subject: RE: BS: Dangerous animals
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 20 May 04 - 02:03 AM

i heard tyhat bees can give you a hart attack etc, so i gl;ad i killed it, serves it right, bloody basterd bee, got no right to bee in my kitchen.

Subject: Obit: Dangerous animals
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 20 May 04 - 01:37 AM

Today, there was a bee in my kitchen, so i killed it, i sqwashed it with a pan, in case it bit me], waht do you think about this, i dont like bee's, they are too dangerous.