BS: Where's the Beef?

Subject: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:10 AM

Hopefully still in the burgers because I see on the news that Wendy's has a new finger food!!!! I never thought of chili as a finger food but there ya' go!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:14 AM

In Martin Gibsons brain?

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: John Hardly
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:20 AM

There's definitely something wrong with this chili but I just can't quite put my finger on the problem.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: John Hardly
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:21 AM

eeeeeeeeeeeww!

This tastes awful!

Let's get out of this joint.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: John Hardly
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:22 AM

Chili fit for a prints.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: gnu
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:36 AM

I got a kick out of the manager saying that they checked all employees at the Wendy's where the finger part was found to see if they each had ten fingers.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 07:44 AM

LMAO John!!!!!

Wonder if there was a prize? I mena I didn't see the "Find The Finger In The Chili" promo but that must have been what was happening.

"Gimmee a Double Cheese and hold the body parts."

"Would you like your order Pinky siz.....er,uh..Biggie Sized?"

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: John Hardly
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 08:01 AM

Woman's Finger Found in Wendy's Chili

by ortcutt

Wed Mar 23rd, 2005 at 17:28:01 PST

A diner bit into a segment of human finger while digging into a bowl of chili at a San Jose Wendy's restaurant Tuesday night, Santa Clara County health officials said today.

The woman, who asked officials not to name or even describe her, spit out the well-cooked digit and reportedly warned other diners to stop eating. She then became sick to her stomach.

"I didn't so much mind the extra protein", said the woman, "but when I found out that it was a middle finger, well, THAT really pissed me off!

I won't be flipped off by anyone!!

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 09:13 AM

The management requires a middle finger inspection to confirm no staff have recently catastrophically lost their middle finger. This check is mandatory. Hot dogs, pencil stubs,, popsicle sticks, sawed-off penises or other stubby objects may NOT be substituted or disguised or claimed as middle fingers.

These inspections will occur weekly until further notice.

The Management.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Charley Noble
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 10:41 AM

This was my second exciting story of the day, after the discovery of soft tissue in Tyrannosaurus Rex fossil remains (separate thread). However, let's not confuse these stories. These remains were not, I repeat, discovered in a Wendy's burger.

The Wendy's chili contained "an inch and a half (finger), with a longish, nicely groomed nail." Well, I'm glad that Anna Ayala nailed this one before she swallowed it.

I like the part were the investigating officers had all the workers in the restaurant line up and hold up their hands so they could ascertain whether any digits were missing. Quick thinking on their part!

I wonder if Anna stayed for desert?

The ad banner reads "Finger Food-Great Deals!"

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: pdq
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 10:52 AM

Charley Noble,

I live in the desert and we are much less likely than city folks to give you 'the finger'.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: pdq
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 10:55 AM

New slogan for San Jose:

"Heart of Silicon Valley, Home of Digital Thinking"

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Wesley S
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 12:46 PM

Was there enough of a finger to get a fingerprint ? If this were on TV I'm sure they could use a computer to recreate the rest of the body so we could see what the victim looked like.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Once Famous
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 12:54 PM

Bunnahadouche or what ever you call yourself.

I don't really care for Wendy's. so why bring me into the thread?

Worry about your own problems, like the warts you probably have on your genitalia.

OK?

Have a fine day.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Bill D
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 01:03 PM

Some guy at the chili processing plant said "Gimme a hand here..." ...there are probably several reports yet to be filed.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: open mike
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:01 PM

waiting to see if the finger prints identified the owner of the missing digit..give a whole new meaning to the term digital image...ouch!

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: open mike
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:13 PM

AP foto here;;
http://staging.hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/F/FINGER_FOOD?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2005-03-23-22-36-22

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: SINSULL
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:26 PM

If this was supposed to be Vegetarian Chili, this lady really has grounds for a lawsuit.

I think I am going to be sick. Do they make the chili on site or get it delivered in huge tubs - meaning that there are gallons of tainted chili (with or without body parts) still to be accounted for. I really am going to be sick.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:31 PM

Like I say Sins, I just wonder WHAT other parts would we be discussing here?

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: GUEST,Uncle DaveO
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:34 PM

Where is Sweeney Todd doing business these days?

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 03:52 PM

Flash!! Fast Food Chain Goes Digital!! Film at Eleven.



A

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Once Famous
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 04:45 PM

I hear the finger has a dirty fingernail.

Must be Clinton Hammond's.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Charley Noble
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 08:31 PM

Martin-

This really isn't about you. However, have you checked your phalanges lately?

The authorities really are going to try to track this one down using fingerprint recognition technology. Amazing! I can hardly wait for the rest of the story.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 08:57 PM

I see that the article says the finger was cooked. If I were with the police, if it's considered a police matter, I'd make sure a forensic laboratory got a sample of the chili that's served there, and analyze the finger, to see if it was cooked in Wendy's chili. If not, Wendy's legal talent should do that, with an independent forensic laboratory.

There's people not above "salting the mine", so to speak, with a finger a friend or family member lost, cooking it and sneaking it into a bowl of chili they ordered. Maybe I'm too paranoid, but somehow this seems suspicious to me.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Once Famous
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 09:04 PM

Can they tell what race or gender this finger was from?

black? long slender female finger?

I agree with Dave O. This could be corporate sabatoge. Or someone's prank to cause trouble.

Or it still could be Clinton Hammond's if it had a bougar under the fingernail.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 25 Mar 05 - 09:24 PM

My thought was really a setup for litigation. Like the old trick of bringing in a cockroach and "finding" it in the salad.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: GUEST,Bill the Collie
Date: 26 Mar 05 - 02:12 AM

They taste a bit like chicken

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Charley Noble
Date: 26 Mar 05 - 09:50 AM

It's pretty likely that the finger in the chili is a set-up, in retrospect. We should get a determination of that from the follow-up investigation. And I'm sure that Wendy's would be more than happy to fund a parallel investigation.

There certainly is a gallows humor element in this story. It has the same irresistible appeal to me as the songs of Sweeny Todd and Dundebeck. I'm not even sure why I find them so amusing, but I do.

Some day I will have to compose the tragic ballad of Marion Dufresne, one of the French explorers who "discovered" New Zealand in the 18 century. He was told several times that it was tabbo to fish from a certain beach, as the funerals for their ancestors took place there. He refused to heed their warnings so they killed him and served him up as a stew. One of my band member comes from the Dufresne family, and it would be very, very wicked to compose this song.

Banner Finger Food ads are now supplemented with South Beach Diet Recipes!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Mar 05 - 08:22 PM

Well. I just want to point out that William Shatner had nothing to do with this incident. Nothing. I knew Wendy's had gone digital some time ago, but I didn't expect them to go this far.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Mar 05 - 08:27 PM

Now just imagine what may show up any day at Taco Bell... (shudder)

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: dianavan
Date: 27 Mar 05 - 12:29 AM

Yes, it certainly could be corporate sabotage, but then you have to wonder who sacrificed the finger. Perhaps its just another body part for sale in the underground market. I wonder what the going price for fingers would be.

I actually know someone who bit into a muffin and inside was a whole, dead mouse! Seems a mouse would be a lot easier if it were truly, corporate sabotage. Why sacrifice a finger?

Dave O and Martin - Don't tell me you are becoming conspiracy theorists!

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 02:12 PM

This just gets worse and worse. According to the latest news report, the lady who found the finger in her chili may have planted it. Her home has been searched for missing digits from the body of a relative who recently passed away. There has to be a song in this.

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 02:17 PM

"Bury me not in a chili pot"
These words came forth most urgently
With the dying breath of my mother-in-law
Who preferred to rest in a bowl of slaw.

It's a start or should I say appetizer?

Subject: RE: BS: Where's the Beef?
From: Peace
Date: 09 Apr 05 - 05:22 PM

Did it look like this?