BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Cluin
Date: 07 Mar 06 - 08:38 PM

Either Khan just farted or JTK just shit his pants.

Or both.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Peace
Date: 07 Mar 06 - 03:31 PM

You have to go to the khan?

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: GUEST,James Tiberius Kirk
Date: 07 Mar 06 - 01:09 AM

KHAAAAAAAAAN!


Phew! Crack a couple of these windows, willya?

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 06 Mar 06 - 07:01 PM

I suppose there might well have been a "fart setting" on a phaser. I'm sure there would have been in a Red Dwarf model.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Mar 06 - 06:56 PM

Kirk would definitely have wanted to beam up, hell...beam ANYWHERE...if Spaw had just let one go in his immediate vicinity. There are some things worse than a phaser set to "kill".

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 06 Mar 06 - 06:53 PM

I rather assume fartology is the symbolic antithesis of uptightedness. Of which there is a certain amount in this thread.

A little of that goes a long way, as any camper knows. And I doubt if it'd be too popular on a spaceship either.

But from time to time, fair enough. And spaw's a master. (It occurs that "Beam me up Scotty" sounds like the punch line of a Shatner fart joke.)

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Peace
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 06:44 PM

Don't like Shatner, don't read the threads.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: gnu
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 04:27 PM

Hahahaha. Cute... very cute.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 03:18 PM

Thanks, Mick, I appreciate that.

And Shatner thanks Giok for his appreciation too. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 01:23 PM

Shatner boring Mick, shame on you me bhoy. Canada's finest, and it's a wonder he can act so well with his tongue so firmly placed in his cheek.
That's got it back on subject now after those 6 posts of thread creep OK?
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 12:43 PM

Giok, the subject of this thread IS the Shatner stuff. I don't believe I have ever posted to one of these threads, but we are just responding to LH's comments about Reg/Shatner. I would not want to imagine a Mudcat without LH. He is one of the best in this place. I just find the whole Shatner thing boring. But I must admit that I haven't read any of it in ages. And I would be absolutely opposed to any attempt to censor it. It is as much a part of the lore as any other part of the 'Cat.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 12:30 PM

Hey the silliness is better than the mudslinging isn't it?
Some of the silly threads like the thread creep is interesting and dare I say informative too!
Giok

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 12:19 PM

No, Giok. Some thread creep has led to some of the grandest threads we've ever had. Thread crap is just that; puerile (there's that word, again!) and a waste of space, imo. It is also more prevalent as actual threads started for its express purpose; more than we have ever seen before. Those thread titles leave lasting first impressions for any visitors who come calling.:-)

LH and I have PM'd and I understand where he is coming from and as I said above, I wish him well and a better Spring.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 11:09 AM

So for 'thread creep' read 'thread crap' Kat?
I'm sorry but I don't understand that post, you seem to agree and disagree in the same sentence.
Life's too short to be taken that seriously, as Azizi says 'don't like don't read'
Anyway that's got the thread even further away from it's start point.
Giok ☺

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 11:00 AM

I've been here since 1998 and love the Mudcat, Azizi. Once in awhile I feel the need to speak out when I see it degrading into so much muck. I guess I could have said "crap posters."

BTW, my mom used to tell me the same thing. If I had done that all of the time, I would never have been a journalist with a published op/ed column, nor an activist. Sometimes I call as I see 'em.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Azizi
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 08:35 AM

"Puerile posters" strikes me as a highclass putdown.

If people want to start play on words [aka copycat threads]or post on them, it's their perogative.

If you don't like them, don't read them.

{Oh, I feel some folk sayings coming on...]

Whether you like these threads or not is a matter of

"Different strokes for different folks".

and one response you could take is to

"Live and let live"

and

[here's new African proverb I just created]

"Though you were invited to the meal, if you don't like all the food set in front of you, you won't hurt the cook's feeling if you don't eat everything".

[and here's another new African proverb]

But "if you talk bad about the cook's cooking, wait until you're far away from the house.

I've always been a very picky eater. And my mama always told me that "if you don't have anything good to say about a person, don't say nothin".

But [almost full circle], I guess that's a matter of different strokes for different folks.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: GUEST,DB
Date: 05 Mar 06 - 05:37 AM

I just have to add that Mr Shatner appears to have written, at least one, science fiction novel. Has anyone read this tome? I couldn't bear to ...

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Alba
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 04:23 PM

So Anonny Mouse, is your question answered and are you not even just a wee bit sorry for asking **BG**
I don't think your missing out by being on the outside of the in club. There are some things one learns to accept over time. I like it out here now:)
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Peace
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 02:26 PM

"Perhaps someone will tell me what I sould or should not say?"

I am sure someone will.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: tarheel
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 01:43 PM

.....BS = Beautiful Sandytoes....

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: gnu
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 01:33 PM

Hehehe. It is to laugh. Otherwise, to cry. Complaints about not being entertained properly by others. Complaints about the quality or quantity of others' posts. Gee whiz golly gosh!!!!!!!!!!!

But, even though LH said, correctly, "stop", don't stop... as long as you post something of value and don't post just to complain.

Oh... I just complained. But, correctly so, I think, maybe... I don't know. Perhaps someone will tell me what I sould or should not say?

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 11:47 AM

Sounds as though you need a trip south, LH, Cuba, perhaps. (You seemed to enjoy it and posted some really interesting stuff about it.) Sorry the winter has been so difficult. May Spring come soon and with it a lift of spirit and soul.

kat

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 10:51 AM

Yeah, that's true. The BS has been flooded with crap lately. It's been a long, hard winter, and it ain't over yet.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 10:19 AM

Fair enough, LH. I am well aware you understand the Lore of Spaw. I don't think I have ever posted to one of the Shatner threads. I also read, up thar, about some old nasty guest refreshing them. I didn't pay any attention because they do not interest me. So, my posting has nothing to do with guest-refreshings.

I have to confess one of the main reasons I said anything in this thread is your constant, of late, posting of copycat drivel threads which serve no purpose other than to fill up the thread titles and amuse a handful of puerile posters. Something has changed with you over the past month or two. I don't see any of your really good postings about matters spiritual or anything of depth. Between you, Peace, and a few others, the BS has been flooded with crap, I don't mean the kind Spaw is known for.

OH, well, to each his own, I guess. I just hate to see the Mudcat used for such.

kat

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Ron Davies
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 08:23 AM

I think what LH says makes sense--after all he's not the one refreshing all those old Shatner threads. So all people have to do is not post on them and they'll drop off. Anybody who doesn't like them can just not open them--it doesn't really help to comment on them. (Yeah, I know I'm doing it now.) I'm the last thing to a Trekkie--about the only thing I know about it is the (excellent) parody of Let It Snow--which I got from Mudcat----but I still think an over-the-top fantasy based VERY loosely on Star Trek, and loaded with puns and musical references--is great fun.

And so, of course, is the Neil Young Home for Terminally Bewildered--or whatever it was.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Jeri
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 07:44 AM

Overly excessive repetitive redundances drive me up a wall no matter who's re-posting stuff. Seriously though, combating crap with crap doesn't work. You add to what you don't like but others don't care about. Crap wins. Shitology or Shatology; there isn't much difference, is there? Spaw writes more per post, but Little Hawk has a tireless staccato approach. It's depth vs. width. It's little rabitty pellets vs. giant sinkers.

What we need is a coming together here. Maybe Paw, Cletus & the Reg Boys decide to get into the film busines and hire Shat for a new Star Trek movie: Close Encounters of the T... "Captain, we have a problem with the Klingons"... no, that's a stupid name. Maybe they're all hired to work at a Star Trek convention. Maybe they decide to re-build a bus and go on the road, and they decide to armor plate it because it's-dangerous-out-there, but all they have are Spaw's lawn-decor toilets, so they hammer those into pieces to bondo to the bus. Eventually, they'll run into Shatner as they drive the porcelain bus through Canada.

There are just so many ideas.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 02:07 AM

Oh, I am glad you said "if", Kat.   It is NOT the only dimension I have seen of Spaw's humor! Like you, I merely am not amused by the scatological stuff. (it doesn't offend me, but doesn't much amuse me either) I love all the other stuff he writes.

I know perfectly well that Spaw's humor is wonderful and full of multidimensional varieties of sidesplittingly funny stuff, combined with insightful and heartfelt writing...I've always known it...and I don't need someone to tell me about it.

Spaw does not need you or anyone else to prove to me that he is a very wise and funny man. It's as obvious as the nose on his face. I know he's a funny man. And if I still find Shatner funny, for my own personal reasons, that's got nothing to do with Spaw and is no negative reflection on his natural ability to amuse you...or me.

You know why this is even happening? A mentally unstable and very malicious former member of this forum who got kicked out of it a long time ago has been anonymously refreshing all the old Shatner threads periodically and flooding the BS section with them. That's why you're all talking about it now. That's what caused the attention of people to be drawn to it. That person wished to cause trouble, and they did, didn't they? How happy they must be. They now have various people here fighting with each other over basically nothing at all. With any luck they may destroy a number of formerly friendly associations on this forum, and won't they be delighted with that? Because all they want to do is control people and cause hurt here and feel powerful in so doing.

Now what would be the smart thing to do in such a situation? Keep fighting with each other about nothing or stop?

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Bert
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 01:30 AM

Everything is Spaw's fault.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Cluin
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 01:13 AM

(I almost said "get on your tits", but I reconsidered)


(maybe I should have reconsidered the whole post)

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Cluin
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 01:08 AM

Yeah, that scatalogical shit can get on your nerves.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Mar 06 - 12:05 AM

If that is the only dimension you've ever seen of Spaw's humour, I add to the pity Sins has expressed for you. There is aboslutely no comparison to be made between the shatshit and the masterful tales of Spaw. And, for the record I don't like the scatalogical stuff and he knows it, but I can still see the humour, regardless.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Cluin
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 10:39 PM

Yeah, we know, LH. And you quit watching TV after the original Star Trek got cancelled.

Jeez, get over it! You know there have been a few Star Trek series since then, right?   ;)

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Tweed
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 08:41 PM

SPAW...!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Tweed
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 08:37 PM

SPAW......!!!

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 06:33 PM

Well, Mick, I've always had a fondness for Shatner and Spock and all that old Star Trek stuff, because the 60's Star Trek show was simultaneously way ahead of its time (at the time) and really, really corny at times too. Some episodes were very imaginative indeed. Others were just downright silly. Because of this, I enjoy humor that is based on the original Star Trek and its various characters. It was a significant part of my past.

A lot of you oldtime Mudcatters enjoy the Reg Boys and all that stuff for the same reason. You were there when they first appeared on the scene, and you remember those days fondly. I wasn't. I was a latecomer to that stuff.

Yes, Shatner's WSSBA was a deliberate take-off or imitation of the NYCFTTS. No doubt about it.

Without Spaw it never would have happened. Therefore, it's really all HIS fault! (ducking and running for cover...)

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 06:15 PM

LH, I love ya to death.........BUT(T)....... I have always thought the Shatner stuff was lame. Reg and the boys are a certified part of the lore here. I have always looked at the Shatner stuff as "wannabe" NYCFTTS stuff. It just never quite jelled with me.

Other than that, love ya man.

Spaw, quit fartin' around and get us the next chapter.

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 01:41 PM

Shatner is a 'cereal' killer!

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 11:03 AM

No, SINSULL, I find all the other stuff in Spaw's stories funny. Very funny. Side-splitting. He is an extremely funny man and a very clever writer. But I do not find the fart jokes funny. At least, very seldom do I find them funny. Your pity, therefore, is misplaced, I think.

I propose that if almost anyone except Spaw were to have written that many fart jokes on this forum that the people who liked it when he did it would not have liked it one bit. They would have made sarcastic and dismissive comments about the writer. People are very subjective about this sort of thing. They laud one individual for doing what they would excoriate another for.

We all have a tendency to do that, as a matter of fact, and it's one of the reasons why newcomers to this forum sometimes have experiences that leave a bad taste in their mouth for awhile.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: MMario
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 09:42 AM

yeah - 'spaw promised us a new story after his last round in the hospital.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Azizi
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 09:32 AM

Captain Spock! My hero!!

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 09:25 AM

Which reminds me - doesn't Spaw owe us a new Cletus, Paw and the Reg Boys story.

Amazing, LH - the only humor you find in Spaw's stories is fart jokes? I pity you.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Amos
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 09:04 AM

I hate to tell you this, my favorite Canuck, but Spaw puts more humour into one Cletus story than has ever appeared on this forum related to Shatner.

I am delighted to hear, however, that it was not you, yourself, who refreshed all the Shat threads of late. I was worried you had entered into yet another cloud of miasmic self-doubt and were madly trying to assert your superiority in this wise. What a relief to find out it was not you, but some other nutball. :D

A

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: John O'L
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 04:12 AM

I thought his rendition of 'Common People' was much better than the original by Pulp, but then I thought my dog sounded better than Pulp when I trod on his paw, so I guess Shatner's version was not necessarily good per se.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: autolycus
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 03:58 AM

It doesn't not make him funny per se, either. Logically.

Best wishes

Ivor

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: GUEST,Spock
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 01:32 AM

He may be funnier than hillbilly fart jokes, but that does not make him funny, per se. Logically speaking.

Spock

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 01:08 AM

There's one more thing to it. When I joined this forum there was a member here who was sort of the unofficial king of the place. Catspaw49. He was composing endless supposedly funny stories about some hillbilly types called Cletus, Paw, and the Reg Boys (brothers who were all named Reg) and a clay possum. I honestly did not think those stories were very funny (although they were very well written), because they relied much too heavily on one main joke...farts. I don't find farts all that funny.   He also had a running joke about Neil Young, the NYCFTTS (Neil Young Center For the Terminally Screwed). That WAS pretty darned funny, I must admit.

I thought, okay, if the forum's uncrowned king can make 800 threads about farts and people think it's still funny...hey, why shouldn't I make a bunch about William Shatner, who is far funnier than repetitive hillbilly fart jokes. Why not?

So I did.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Cluin
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 12:57 AM

I like Shatner's sense of humour too, his taking himself not-so-seriously. He's given me quite a few chuckles over the years.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 12:54 AM

But you will not be able to refresh them anymore. Thankfully.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 12:52 AM

Yes, it's an in-joke. I started it way back when. Several key factors:

1. Shatner is Canadian. So am I.
2. Shatner had a rather oddly different acting style which became famous (or infamous) in the original Star Trek series. This makes him good for a running gag.
3. Shatner became a huge icon to legions of nerdy Star Trek fans. Excellent. More good joke possibilities.
4. He can't sing. Not at all. But...he has recorded a number of unbelievably terrible renditions of songs over the years. Terrific!
5. Some thought Captain Kirk was really sexy. Some didn't. More comic possibilities.

Anyway, I decided, on a whim, to pretend to madly worship everything about the man. I raved about him at every opportunity on this forum. I acclaimed his acting, his singing, his sexiness, his awesomely incredible Shatnerrific omnipotence at every juncture.

Some people were amused. Some were bored. Some were disgusted. Some liked the joke and jumped on the bandwagon and also pretended to worship Big Bill.

Now, here's the really cool part. I gradually developed a real respect for Mr Shatner, because I was finding out more about him, and reading some stuff he wrote. He is not the least bit afraid to make fun of himself. I like that. Bill is pretty cool in his own weird way. I have come to genuinely like William Shatner, and I started out just making fun of him.

That is the basic story.

Now there is some disgruntled person out there who hates either me or my Shatner joke...and they periodically refresh all the old threads about Shatner in order to attack me...or the joke itself...

They have just had their game stopped, because those threads are now closed, and cannot be posted to again.

But...you can still read them.

For the whole glorious saga, put "shatner" in the little filter box at the top of the main page, indicate "3 years", and look them up.

Subject: RE: BS: I'M SORRY!! I HAVE to ask!!!
From: Joe Offer
Date: 03 Mar 06 - 12:43 AM

It's called gratuitous obnoxiousness, I believe...and perhaps you could have asked the question in an existing Shatner thread, instead of starting yet another one...