BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)

Subject: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: SharonA
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 02:02 PM

It's official, as of this date and time: I'm 50 years old. I guess I should be happy I made it this far, considering all my health issues, but poop, it's 50 freakin' years! I'm officially over the hill; is it all downhill from here? I've got no significant other and no real prospect of one; is there hope??

Went to my favorite local music store today and bought myself a little pressie with the birthday money from my brother (a metal Latin-percussion shaker)... it was a bittersweet experience. On the plus side, the clerk gave me a $5 discount because it was my birthday. On the other hand, he said "Relax, 50 is the new 60" and then told me his father just turned 50, and THEN started telling me how things were "back in [his] day" (not the kid's father's day; the kid's day). I told him he wasn't old enough to use that phrase.

Anyway, I'll be playing music and singing at a gig tonight, so I'm glad I can still do that for a good while yet. It's a benefit for cancer research, so it's not a paying gig, but I can't think of a better use of this newly-old-timer's birthday than to donate my time to a good cause. But, oy, am I going to have some achy joints tomorrow!

Agedly,
Sharon

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: jacqui.c
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 02:08 PM

Sharon - since I turned fifty I have done a tandem parachute jump, abseiled, started singing at folk club sessions, remarried and moved from Hertford UK to Maine USA. I found Mudcat and now have friends all over the world, a lot of whom I have been fortunate to meet in person.

Trust me, fifty is not a problem.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: gnu
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 02:19 PM

Good to hear that Jac. I shall be 50 next time around. If I make, that is. I am not working on it.

Sharon. Have a great "40th" birthday.... 50 is the new 40. Kids these days, eh? Stunned pup!

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: catspaw49
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 02:21 PM

Well Sharon, back in '99 at this time, I was just happy to have made 50!!!! Most of the 'Cat was pretty surprised as well!!!

But yesterday I turned 57 and this past year has been really wonderful as I went from the absolute ddepths to new heights I hadn't approached in years. Karen and I are both happy and planning more than we have been able to in a long time.

Happy Birthday and ENJOY!!!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Alba
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 03:04 PM

"Age doesn't matter, unless you're cheese." Billie Burke

Hey there Young thing.
Don't let a little thing like arithmetic get in the way of Life.
5 + 0 = 5!!
Listen to Spaw, he is really old and knows a things or four * giggle*

Happiest of Birth Day Wishes Sharon.
Have a Great Day and a New Year filled with Adventure and Happiness.
Best Wishes to You.
Jude

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 04:02 PM

Well, from someone's who's 61 -- consider the alternative. Then have another drink and consider it again. Drink until you realize that with the alternative you couldn't drink anymore.

Happy birthday.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: CarolC
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 04:12 PM

Happy 50th, Sharon!

I crested the half century milestone this past January. I didn't know what to expect, but I must say, I'm pleasantly surprised (so far). Some aspects of my life have been spontaneously changing, and so far, it looks like for the better. And I've even been making some progress on my own health issues, thankfully.

Here's hoping this decade brings the changes you want in your life.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: GUEST,Kendall
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 04:52 PM

Wanna swap?

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: SunnySister
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 06:26 PM

Happy birthday Sharon!!

I can relate! I turned 40 back in July (yes, I'll be 41 soon). It was a hard birthday for me because I thought that that was the start of middle age (when is it?? I haven't a clue anymore ;)

I was so depressed the day before my birthday until I had the idea to play some of my favorite CDs. I ended up singing right up and into my birthday. Turning 40 felt quite alright after that. The music reminded me that living is living and if you can enjoy, it's not that bad at all.

I am celebrating you today Sharon! Not only because it's your birthday (although that's reason enough)- more though that you are such a great lady that you would do benefit concert on your birthday. Three cheers for you!!

--SunnySister, who needs to go home and dye her hair... LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Amos
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 09:19 PM

Well, having marched down this path for ten years while you were both in your late teens (thirties is late teens, isn't it?) I can assure you that each decade brings its own delights and if you don't waste your hours wishing you were what you ain't you can spend more time enjoying them. Worrying about your life cycle being where it is is kinda like worrying about your underwear while you sleep or something -- it just confuses the issuer! :D


A

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: beardedbruce
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 09:22 PM

1956 was a VERY good year...

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Tannywheeler
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 09:27 PM

You young pups are soooo.....young. The alternative to another birthday is to die. I've seen it done and it's NOT fun. Play more music, sing more, have a glass of red wine (or a good beer), and consider that you are developing the wisdom to solve all the problems of the world, the discernment to know what constitutes a REAL problem, and the good sense to laugh at yourself. And you're practicing perseverance, which is another good thing to develop. Why consolation? I rejoice for you, and the rest of the world which will benefit from your good sense, wisdom, perseverance, and other well-established character traits you embody "as time goes by".    Tw

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: bbc
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 10:28 PM

Happy birthday, Sharon; it's ok to enjoy it! You should have lots of good times still ahead. I'm 53 & liking myself more & more. Yup, there are some ups & downs. Like you, I don't have a significant other & expected to. Even so, I find that there's a lot of good in life & that, now that my kids are grown, I can do things to suit myself. If you look for the good, chances are you'll find it.

Wishing you much happiness!

love,

barbara

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Bobert
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 10:34 PM

Hey, long time no hear... Seems like 'bout 50 years...

But, hey, this Sept. I'll be 60 so if yer looking for consolation, find someone else but...

Happy Birthday...

BObert

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: LadyJean
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 11:44 PM

Right, let me tell you about my cousin, John Caldwell.
After he finished college, in the 1930s, he began a career as a pulp writer. That didn't work out, and the Coast Guard wouldn't take him during WWII. So, he and his sister bought a small dairy farm in Burlington, Kentucky, and he raised brown swiss cattle, the bovine divine, until the late 60s, when he couldn't compete with the big factory farms.
His sister, who was a teacher, got him a job as head of the county Head Start program. He was always the last to leave the school at the end of the day. While he was at it, he got a Master's degree in community planning. For the next couple of decades he set up job programs, worked with substance abusers (I offered to send him my two college roommates.)and set up literacy programs.
Then he retired, and took up the great American passtime, family history. While he was collecting data on past Caldwells, Eversulls and Porters, he found the Dinsmore Homestead, an old farm house occupied by a family who'd known just about everybody, who was anybody, both presidents Roosevelt, Learned Hand, and I don't know who all else. He head the comittee that turned the home into a museum. He was pushing 90, when they honored him for his work with historic preservation. He was also growing his own aparasgrass. Just to keep a hand in. John was 91 when he died, last year, after an incredibly active life, and did I mention that he'd been totally blind since he was 13, because that does make a difference.
You've still got a lot to do.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 09 Jun 06 - 11:57 PM

The newspaper for June 6th had an article about how mothers in this city of 1,000,000 didn't want to give birth that day because 666 is the the number of the beast in the Book of Revelations. (These were cases where labor needed to be induced.) Hospitals that usually did 6, 8 or 10 of these a day did 0.

This was not just in the poor neighborhoods where people with no chance for education would live. It was all over town.

So here we had mothers who preferred to have their babies delivered by hospital staff whose workload was doubled by skipping a day. And we know that doctors and nurses are overworked and sleep-deprived at the best of times.

If this is the way the western world is going, then I'm glad that my time to live started way before now.

Happy birthday.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Manitas_at_home
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 02:11 AM

50's ok. You can get insurance and travel from SAGA. You can expect younger people to give up their seats on the bus for you. You can start using the phrase "In my day..."...

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: bobad
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 07:11 AM

Been there, done that
Got the t-shirt
It wore out
Now it's a rag

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: *daylia*
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 07:53 AM

25 was real hard. The idea of being a whole quarter of a century old was sobering - for the first time in my life, I think, I realized I was indeed mortal. Not a kid anymore, even though I had 3 kids already. The spectre of death looming on the not-so-distant-after-all horizon .... terrifying! 30 was worse, and 40 was godawful. But over the last few years, and especially this past year, I've developed a 3-part remedy for the birthday blues.

First, I quit coloring my hair a couple years ago, made myself discover that gray hair was nothing to be frightened or ashamed of, and learned to love all that silver. Now I'm quite the rainbow-head -- blonde, red, brown, and silver all on one scalp. But it's me, after all, and I love me!

Hey, I really do, for the first time in my life, I think!   :-)   

And I do need to know who I really am, where I'm really at on the road of life. I need to accept this, with joy and confidence and gratitude. I need to be honest with myself. I ain't no spring chicken anymore, and I'm glad! I wouldn't go through all bs, all that trial and error again for a million bucks -- or a million non-gray hairs. Life is so much easier these days, now that I kinda HALF know what I'm doing, what I really need, what it's all about ....

2nd, I spend a lot of time helping my parents, watching them grow older, less mobile, more and more feeble. And every time I realize I've just run up a flight of stairs, or get back from a walk on the nature trail, or even bend over SO easily to tie my shoes, I feel grateful these days. And oh, so very very young ...

But I like this one the best!   This year, I turned 48. It was touch and go there for a bit, a couple weeks before the big day, but then I decided that I wasn't going to turn 48. I was turning 60. Every time someone asked me how old I was going to be, I said "60". And every time I looked in the mirror, I said to myself "Self, you look SO GREAT, for 60!!". I'd get up in the morning and say "Wow, I feel so GOOD, for 60!"   And I'm still doing SO well, for 60! :-)

In a couple years I'll make it 70. Why not? That way I'm prepared.
Hee hee!

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Bill D
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 09:58 AM

like a fine wine, maturity adds mellowness and depth to a woman.*smile* Just think, you aren't even half-way to the record!

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 10:51 AM

I like birthdays, it means I got thru the year without dying, unlike a lot of folks.

In February I will turn 55 & retire, now that's a scary thought - retire, all that free, unstructured time to do stuff!!

Enjoy life, this is not a dress rehersal.

sandra

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: wysiwyg
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 01:40 PM

Happy Birthday!

Look-- don't worry about that "getting better not older" thing. Just do, please, continue to GET older. That'll do just fine.

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Scoville
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 02:47 PM

My dad turned 60 this year and shows no signs of slowing down. He's planning to go surveying in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan when he retires (whenever that happens).

I've come to the conclusion that the best thing to do is keep "doing" and forget about the number. I'll be 29 in a couple of weeks and I feel old. [Don't laugh, please.] I don't feel old because of the "29" part, but because I don't feel like I've done enough with myself for somebody my age. My own fault/problem; there's nothing stopping me but myself (I don't have a husband, kids, a mortgage, students loans anymore, arthritis, whatever, to slow me down, so what's my excuse?).

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: HuwG
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 08:41 PM

I'm not that far behind you. I find that it helps to look forward; to think what else you can do and what new sights there are to see, rather than look back on what you've done and either rest on your laurels or spend useless hours regretting.

All the best.

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 08:48 PM

I will be 59 in October. The years don't bother me at all - I have never seen the reasoning behind lying about your age.
But I do wish gravity could have been a little kinder.
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 10 Jun 06 - 10:42 PM

it's 50 freakin' years! I'm officially over the hill

Speak for yerself, Jack! You're just a day older than you were yesterday. What's all the fuss about? :)

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 11 Jun 06 - 01:23 PM

Sharon.
I fully understand health issues! And a month from 6-9, on July 9 I will make it to sixty-five. I was so sure I'd never, ever, be old enough to retire that I spent my entire life retired! --- What is being a folksinger on the road other than perpetual retirement? Doing gigs one-by-one, where you're nominally out-of-work after every gig (because you love doing it that way) is just like being satisfactorily retired. I'm a lucky guy!!!

Happy birthday---and congratulations!

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 11 Jun 06 - 06:53 PM

Happy Birthday!!!

Hey, I just turned 57 on our shared B.D.

50 is the old age of youth and the youth of old age -- don't sweat it. As one of my email taglines states, "Young at heart -- slightly older in other places." (particularly the knees, but I'm working on that)

The "difficult*" significant B.D. was 40 -- when I realized I was too old for Yale Younger Poets and to be a salvage diver.

(* In actuality, I have enjoyed every age I've ever been -- though I choose NEVER to revisit my teens or even my 20s.)

Have a really great day -- don't forget to celebrate for at least a month, and certainly don't worry about the significance of turning 50. And, as far as I'm concerned, you're still a kid!

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: GUEST,Dani
Date: 11 Jun 06 - 10:16 PM

Happy Birthday, Sharon!

And, Amen brothers and sisters.

All this talk about Mudcatters being insane.... bullshit. I've never met a wiser bunch. Unless the insanity MAKES one so wise?

Dani

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Mingulay
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 06:49 PM

GUEST Dani, as they say "it takes one to know one". Which begs the question, what if there are two?

Bye the way hope you had a Happy Birthday 'child'.

Mingulay (now in his 60th year)

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: MuddleC
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 08:11 PM

hello SharonA, I was so busy screwing up a meaningful relationship, that I've only just realised I was 50 two months ago, so it's not that important a milestone!- just find something to take your eye off the clock, that Jacqui.c has the right idea, emigrate!.... but how do you get that little green card..... ?

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Alba
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 08:31 PM

Sharon, now that is 3 days of being consoled.
That should do it **Big Grin**
Come on Darlin get out of your PJ's cause there's a whole big World full of Folks and Music and...oh too much of all kinds of good stuff to mention.... and it's all just a waiting fir a youngin like you to come out to play!:>)
J

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: jacqui.c
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 05:10 AM

muddleC - first find an available folkie...... :0)

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: SharonA
Date: 13 Jun 06 - 02:21 PM

Wow, that's a lot of wisdom condensed into 33 posts! Thank you all for your kind words and good wishes. Sorry I didn't stop back earlier, but this is the first time I've logged in since last Friday afternoon (no internet access at home -- I have to use the local library when it's open and when I'm in town!). Indeed it was a happy birthday; the charity gig was full of sound-system snafu's, a rain delay and a band-member-arrival delay but came off relatively well nonetheless. Strained my voice and got sore fingers from smacking the dumbek, though... problems unrelated to age, to be sure, but everything still hurts today! *wry grin*

jacqui c, I would be happy to do even half the stuff you've done post-50! (Among the half of stuff I would NOT be happy to do: parachute jumping! Eek!!!)

gnu, even the music-store-clerk's co-workers tell me he's a stunned pup! (or words to that effect)

Spaw, I'm glad you are still kickin' around these parts. Best wishes for your own health and many more years of happiness with Karen.

Rapaire: Excellent suggestion!

CarolC, glad to hear there's progress on your health concerns. Happy 50-and-a-half?

Kendall: No thanks. But I take your point. :^)

SunnySis: Not sure where middle age "starts" but I'm pretty sure I'm in it now! Yeah, 40 was very hard for me too: a 13-year relationship was at a bitter end and I was looking for a place to move out to. But a friend told me to immerse myself in something I enjoyed, and I chose music. 10 years later, 50 is a much happier milestone! (Thanks for the 3 cheers!)

Amos sez, "Worrying about your life cycle being where it is is kinda like worrying about your underwear while you sleep or something -- it just confuses the issuer!" Issuer does! *grin*

beardedbruce a.k.a. Bruce Sinatra: Thanks!

Tannywheeler: I'll take the good beer! "Good sense"? "Wisdom"? "Perseverance"? I dunno; it seems like I'm persevering at being a nonsensical fool!

bbc/Barbara: Ah, but you have children; they are very significant others!

BO Bert!!! Howdy! I still owe you a tape in exchange for yours! I'll put that on my list of "Things to Do Before 60" *grin*

LadyJean: Okay, now I'm depressed again. Wish I could have accomplished the exceptional list of things your cousin had done against greater odds than I've got. Your pride in him is quite understandable!

Leeneia: What a shame that this year's D-Day commemorations were lost amid all that 666 nonsense. My birthday's numbers have a "meaning" too, a rather embarrassing one in polite company, at least when using the order that Americans use for writing the date... think about it.

Manitas: You must know some very polite young people. Around here, it's every person for him- or herself on the bus.

bobad: Ah, yes... ragtime!

*daylia*: Yeah, I tried coloring my hair once, last year, but my scalp got inflamed from the chemicals. So it's the all-natural look for me too. Watching my parents grow old and die had the opposite effect on me: can't help thinking that this is what I have to look forward to -- blechh. As for saying that I'm older than I am: my mindset, early each year, is admit that for all intents and purposes I am my next birthday's age-number... but I'm not ready to calculate a decade ahead just yet. A half-year ahead is plenty!

Bill D: You forgot "sourness". *big grin*

Sandra, Susan, HuwG, SRS, Dani, Mingulay: Thank you!

Scoville sez, "I don't feel like I've done enough with myself for somebody my age. My own fault/problem; there's nothing stopping me but myself." My dilemma exactly. Sounds like you're wise beyond your years already.

SINSULL: I don't lie about my age either. What bothers me is that my age is lying about!

Art Thieme: Indeed you are fortunate in many ways, and we're fortunate that you grace us with your presence here. Hope you'll stick around for many more!

Bat Goddess/Linn: That's right; we had a co-birthday! Hope yours was happy too! One of my favorite mottos is on my fridge: "Middle age is when the broadness of the mind and the narrowness of the waist change places."

MuddleC: Ever since G.W. Bush took office in 2001 I've toyed with the idea of emigration! But I'll probably keep hanging in there. Only 2-and-a-half more years to go, only 2-and-a-half more years to go...

Alba/Jude: PJ's? Who wears PJ's? :^D
Fear not; I'm doing plenty of playing of music with plenty of folks. Heck, I won't get a night off from music till Sunday! ...oh, wait, that's an open mic night... Monday, maybe?

Thanks again for the boost, everyone! Much love and (((big hugs))) to you all,
Sharon

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:24 AM

Sharon, just found this thread and see where the 'folks' have energized you. Turning 60 is fine also. (I know) And it sure beats the only alternative available.

And, you apparently are having a great time even with GWB in office. Keep on singing!

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: karen k
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:59 AM

I'll be 60 in December then we will both be at the low end of the decade. I'd rather be 50 than 60 but can't change it so I guess I'll have to live with it.

Hope you had a happy birthday.

karen

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 01:30 PM

Hi Sharon, and a belated happy birthday.

I realised many years ago that age is a thing of the mind. You can be physically 60 years old, and it doesn't matter, if you are young inside your head. You can do all that you ever were able to do, but rather more slowly.

I've just retired, and I'm making a start on all the things I never had time for when I was younger, in spite of a bit of heart trouble over the last year.

Just be the age your mind thinks you are, and birthdays ain't so scary.

Don T. (65 year old teen who hasn't decided yet what to be when he grows up, IF he decides to grow up).

Subject: RE: BS: Need consolation - birthday #50 (June 9)
From: Ron Davies
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 10:31 PM

Sharon

Happy birthday (though late)--- But it really sounds like you don't need any advice-- you've already figured out what to do--playing and singing lots of music with lots of folks--which is one of the absolute best things you can do for them and for yourself-- every day.