Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)

Subject: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:17 AM

No shit, it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

In Aspen, not jail, in case you were wondering. Livin' like a refugee? I don't think so.

Washington Post article.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Barry Finn
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:21 AM

Poor fellow, must've worked himself to death.
Barry

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:24 AM

RIP Kenny Boy.

The Ballad of Kenny-Boy
Sung to the tune of The Ballad of Jed Clampett
(Beverly Hillbillies theme Song)
Words and music by Paul Henning,
as performed by Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs



Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Lay
Whose only goal in life was to increase his pay
He was born in Missouri to plain old Baptist folk
But he thought the golden rule was nothin' but a joke.

Kenny-Boy went off to Houston to go to university
And pretty soon thereafter he got his Ph.D.
On his diploma was Ec-o-nom-ics
But he made his money with a bunch of dirty tricks.

Enron . . . Chewco . . . Whitewing

Enron was a company that delivered gas and oil
But it didn't pay enough for Kenny's time and toil
He found a scheme to get between the seller and the buyer
He says it weren't no wrong; John McCain thinks he's a liar.

Off the books, undisclosed liabilities hidden from investors

To be his CEO, Ken hired Jeffrey Skilling
Who said to his boss, "Here's how we'll make a killing:
We'll let Enron keep the profits and hide all the losses,
Don't tell employees, just share this with the bosses."

JEDI, that's Joint Energy Development Investments

Well the first thing ya' know, Kenny-boy's a millionaire
He said: "I want mo' money. How I get it, I don't care!
Accounting's not all black and white -- plenty of it's gray.
As long as my stock goes up I'll look the other way."

"Sometimes things aren't exactly black-and-white when it comes to accounting procedures." George Bush - July, 2002

Kenny saw he'd need a way to make it seem legit'
While he was busy grabbin' all that he could get
He needed an accountant with the morals of a whore,
Who knew how to cook the books so he'd get more and more.

Arthur Andersen LLP, headed by Joe "I can't recall" Berardino

Regulators? no problem! Kenny had a friend named Bush
Who told him he'd appoint whoere' Ken would wish,
So to make the FERC do what Kenny though it should,
He put in place a Texan whose name was Pat Wood.

FERC, that's Federal Energy Regulatory Commission

An energy policy was needed for the nation
Bush made sure that Kenny-boy was there for its creation
Enron folk got secret meetings with Vice President Dick Cheney
(Former Haliburton CEO no longer seems so brainy)

Congressional investigative arm takes Vice Pres to court . . .

An Enronite named Sherron Watkins sounded the alarm
Ken and Jeff said, "We're just millionaires who never did no harm"
Sherron said, "alarming accounting irregularities"
Jeff said, "No, just complex accounting subtleties."

"implode in a wave of accounting scandals," she wrote

Then there came a problem that Ken did not foresee,
A little technicality that we call bankruptcy
When the bankers quit a-lending, and the stock was in free fall
Ken picked up the phone; Bush did not return his call.

"Ken who? Campaign contributions? That was Clinton, not us," said Ari Fleischer

A little while afterwards, with Enron in the red
Clifford Baxter took a gun and put it to his head
Kenny blamed the media, said they paid too much attention
But Enron and its deals were Kenny-boy's invention.

What's the media supposed to do with the largest bankruptcy in U.S. history?

Kenny's wife went on the TV to say that they was poor
They had to sell a house in Aspen and they've only got two more
Folks that lost their jobs and savings say Ken and she's still rich
It's hard to have much sympathy for such a spoiled b**ch.

Two homes in Aspen? better than bein' Lay-ed off

Next thing was the Congresspeople, all investigatin'
All but Skilling took the fifth to a-void explicatin'
Campaign finance passed the Congress, nothing Bush could do
Lobbyists will find another way to get the money through.

Best Congress money can buy! Legalized bribery!

Ken looked at his bank account; there just was not enough
His wife Linda opened up a shop, that she called "Jus' Stuff"
There they sell accoutrements from their life of luxury
They'll have to sell a sh*tload to pay their attorney's fee.

bronze goat ($700), painted horse ($3,600), Charles Barkley jersey ($380)

Enron insider Michael Kopper was the first to cop a plea
He pays a $12 mil fine, and the go'erment lets him be
Prosecutors hope he'll provide some worthwhile testimony
Enough to charge Ken Lay and every Enron crony.

Kopper, top deputy to Enron CFO

Enron's CFO was a man named Andrew Fastow
Who regarded Enron as his personal cash-cow
What he suckled from the bloated Enron udder
Is enough to make any working man shudder.

"improperly pocketing more than $31 million"

Andrew Fastow turned himself in to the FBI
The feds are always lookin' for bigger fish to fry
Eventually he may lose his ill-gotten gains
Though that doesn't start to rectify Enron's investors' pains.

fraud, money laundering and conspiracy

A Congressional panel found that Enron paid no tax
while they were pushin' executive compensation to the max.
It's clear that only working folk got the Enron axe
No matter how you spin it, them's the simple facts.

Aw shucks! Ken and Jeff were just implementin' Bush's tax cuts for the rich a few years early

We hope it's time to say goodbye to Ken and all his kin
Too bad that you're now OUT what you invested IN
They thought they were so smart they had a scheme that could not fail,
They'll have time to think it over as they sit a spell in jail.

Do not pass go, Do not collect two hundred million dollars
Chain gangs . . . guard towers . . . . group showers . . . bye bye!
ya'll come back now, and see how this ballad ends, ya' hear?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:25 AM

Ode To Ken "Kenny Boy" Lay (To be sung to the tune of "Danny Boy")
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Oh Kenny Boy, the jails, the jails are calling,
From state to state, and through the world so wide.
The money's gone, and all the chips are falling,
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and you must hide.

But come ye back when lawmen stop their yam'ring,
Or when the Dems are hushed and eating crow.
'Tis I'll be there in office or in Crawford,
Oh Kenny Boy, oh Kenny Boy, I love you so.

But if you're jailed, and I am in the Oval,
If I'm still Prez, as Prez I expect to be,
Don't come and ask for favors or a pardon,
Don't kneel and say a rescue plea to me.

For I shan't hear, tho' loud you beg before me,
Though all I craved you gladly gave to me.
You'll have to fend without me if you love me,
And you will keep your peace, so I stay Prez and free.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:36 AM

Apparently, Danny Boy is the preferred tune for Ken Lay parody songs. Here is another fragment I dug up from Calvin over at The Nation website:

Kenny Boy
Calvin Trillin


(A Houston version of the Irish folk song)

Oh, Kenny Boy, your friends are disappearing.
They don't know you, much less your kvetchy wife.
Yes, it's sad when pols that you've been shmeering
Now hope that you'll get twenty years to life.
They sang your song: They passed deregulation.
They passed your laws. They bent the regs your way.
But now they track your every obfuscation.
Old Kenny Boy, their Kenny Boy's now Mr. Lay.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Paul Burke
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:40 AM

De mortuis nihil nisi bonum? naaaa.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:50 AM

"Danny Boy" Based on the performance by Traditional
"Kenny Boy" Parody by William Tong
Satire about Kenneth Lay, CEO of the now banktrupt Enron Corp., major Bush crony, dubbed "Kenny Boy" by his pal, Dubya
Oh Kenny Boy, your type is just appalling.
Republicans were always on your side.
Now Enron's gone, and those in power are crying.
Their ties to you are what they're trying to hide.

Ain't this payback the bummer that you've dreaded so?
Your "talks" with Cheney hushed from months ago?
You had his ear; what you got back, we'd like to know.
Oh Kenny Boy, oh Kenny Boy, now you're the show.

So don't play dumb, 'cause those in power are lying.
Why not instead, admit your scale of greed?
Kingdom you've bought; on Bush you were relying...
You'd lead the way - Shrub gives you what you need.

And now we hear: Ashcroft recusing publicly;
That Bush's team let you set policy.
Enron has failed, through your lies and duplicity.
Your ties are deep; drag down the Shrub presidency.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: SunnySister
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:58 AM

Amazing... I was told by friends that Bush would pardon him before he left office, now it seems Bush won't need to. Can't figure out who is luckier, Bush or Lay?

I feel like such a bitter cynical person these days... I should be a little bit more sympathic since my father died in 2003 from a massive coronary. However, I think about all those people who lost their retirement and their life savings and I can't quite feel sad about his loss in the world- not even a little bit.

--SunnySister

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Sorcha
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:03 PM

'They' are saying, 'massive coronary'.....anybody for suicide?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Charmion
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:03 PM

I've been reading The Smartest Guys In The Room. It seems Mr. Lay was quite a piece of work.

He's facing a higher court now.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:09 PM

Oh my God, we killed Kenny! We're bastards!

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: leeneia
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:26 PM

1. In the meantime, the people who think "The Londonderry Air" is a beautiful melody and would like to see it refreshing the human spirit can just suck it up. It's not copyright, so why not turn it into junk?

2. It would make more sense to channel all this energy into a way of preventing such fraud. Legislation forbidding corporations to enter into partnerships, for example...

A corporation should stay a corporation, not turn intself into a hybrid beast. Anyone who has taken Accounting 101 can tell you that partnerships are a risky way of doing business.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: wysiwyg
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:33 PM

"Ken Lay Dead of Heart Attack" ... reportedly while vacationing up in Aspen.

~S~

Subject: Lyr Add: DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD(Harburg/Arlen
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:35 PM

SONG PARODY CHALLENGE ALERT!

Write a Ken Lay obit song to the tune of Ding, Dong the Witch is Dead...

Here are the lyrics from the Wizard of Oz site:


(Glinda)
Come out, come out wherever you are
And meet the young lady who fell from a star
She fell from the sky, she fell very far
And Kansas she says is the name of the star

(Munchkins)
Kansas she says is the name of the star

(Glinda)
She brings you good news, or haven't you heard
When she fell out of Kansas a miracle occurred

(Dorothy)
It really was no miracle
What happened was just this:
The wind began to switch the house to pitch
And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch
Just then the witch, to satisfy an itch
Went flying on her broomstick thumbing for a hitch

(Munchkin Man)
And oh what happened then was rich

(Munchkins)
The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch
Which was not a healthy situation for the wicked witch

The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch
Which was not a healthy situation for the wicked witch
Who began to twitch, and was reduced to just a stitch
Of what was once the wicked witch

(Munchkin 1)
We thank you very sweetly for doing it so neatly

(Munchkin 2)
You've killed her so completely
That we thank you very sweetly

(Glinda)
Let the joyous news be spread
The wicked, old witch at last is dead

(Munchkins)
Ding-dong the witch is dead
Which old witch? The wicked witch
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead
Wake up you sleepyhead
Rub your eyes, get out of bed
Wake up the wicked witch is dead
She's gone where the goblins go
Below - below - below
Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out
Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low
Let them know the Wicked Witch is dead

(Mayor)
As mayor of the Munchkin City
In the county of the land of Oz
I welcome you most regally

(Judge)
But we've got to verify it legally
To see...

(Mayor)
To see...

(Judge)
If she...

(Mayor)
If she...

(Judge)
Is morally, ethically

(Munchkin 1)
Spiritually, physically

(Munchkin 2)
Positively, absolutely

(Munchkin Men)
Undeniably and reliably dead

(Coroner)
As Coroner , I thoroughly examined her
And she's not only merely dead
She's really most sincerely dead

(Mayor)
Then this is a day of independence for all the munchkins
And their descendants
Yes, let the joyous news be spread
The wicked old witch at last is dead

(Munchkins)
Ding-dong the witch is dead
Which old witch? The wicked witch
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead
Wake up you sleepyhead
Rub your eyes, get out of bed
Wake up the wicked witch is dead
She's gone where the goblins go
Below - below - below
Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out
Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low
Let them know the Wicked Witch is dead

(Lullaby League)
We represent the Lullaby League
The Lullaby League, the Lullaby League
And in the name of the Lullaby League
We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land

(Lollipop Guild)
We represent the Lollipop Guild
The Lollipop Guild, the Lollipop Guild
And in the name of the Lollipop Guild
We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land

(Munchkins)
We welcome you to Munchkin Land
Tra la la la la la la la la la la la

(Munchkin 1)
From now on you'll be history

(Munchkin 2)
You'll be his...

(Munchkin 3)
You'll be his...

(Munchkin 4)
You'll be history

(Munchkin 1)
And we will glorify your name
You will be a bust...

(Munchkin 2)
Be a bust...

(Munchkin 3)
Be a bust...

(All)
In the hall of fame
Tra la la la la la la la la la la
Tra la la la la la la
Tra la la la la la la la la la la
Tra la la la la la la

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 12:38 PM

Actually leenia, parodying the powerful is a tried, tested, and true way of waking up the sleepy head electorate and getting them engaged enough to seek change in the status quo.

So what's yer problem, that we aren't playing nice?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Alba
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 01:09 PM

How about this as a passing thought...

Ken Lay is not dead. He is already in a another Country. Perhaps what has taken place is one of the most carefully planned escapes in recent shadowy government history.

...as I said, just a thought.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: JedMarum
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 01:36 PM

It's true. CNN just reported that he was seen on the Baja peninsula on a fishing trip.

It may be a look-alike body in Aspen, but I don;t think they could fake the DNA.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 01:51 PM

No need to doctor DNA when you can doctor documents like the death certificate. Or the autopsy report (see JFK).

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Ebbie
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 01:52 PM

Did his wife go with him?

On the other hand, will this be another Elvis-is-not-dead unending tale?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST,maryrrf
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 02:13 PM

I think I would have preferred for him to suffer in prison rather than to die a (relatively) easy death through a heart attack. He was a pretty poor excuse for a human being, in my book.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 02:16 PM

Yes, it would have been nice if he had been locked up and given gruel once or twice a week for 20 years. And then, be put on the streets of Calcutta without a penny or a cell phone.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 02:26 PM

Fell down went boom did he?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 02:32 PM

I notice they haven't yet updated the 'Recent Developments' section of Kenny Boy's website.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: stallion
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 02:36 PM

We had a guy called Saunders who was caught up, and jailed, for his duplicity in the Guiness company, he was released from prison on the grounds that he had Altzhiemers, once out of jail he made a full recovery, sadly my Father didn't. It never ceases to amaze me how people all over the world buy into the system of "screw them for more than they are screwing you" philosophy, in the US it's called the american dream,

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: dianavan
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 04:17 PM

He stood to lose about 43 million dollars when sentenced. Thats enough to make anyone have a heart attack!

But, like his website suggests, its all in God's hands.

I'm sure a just God will send him straight to hell. I hear the flames of hell are fuelled by oil and gas. I doubt if he will be able to convince the devil to share the profits. I wonder what kind of life insurance policy he had?

Abramoff's next but if there is no Jewish hell, I can only hope that his life will become hell on earth.

Since God seems to be very busy dispensing justice, I hope Bush, Cheney and Rove are also on his list.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Ebbie
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 09:05 PM

Frankly, I don't really wish justice on anyone.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 09:41 PM

SAN FRANCISCO (MarketWatch) -- Peabody Energy Corp., in a move to build a bigger presence in the booming Far East energy market, has struck a deal to buy Australia's Excel Coal Ltd. for $1.34 billion, company officials said Wednesday...

and the beat goes on.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:12 PM

From the Wall Street Journal's Law Blog today:

Question: Why was Lay in Aspen, Colo.? How was a convicted defendant allowed to leave Houston prior to sentencing?

Answer: Judge Sim Lake released both Lay and Skilling pending their sentencing. Lay's lawyers made a special request to allow Lay to travel to Colorado, where he once had three separate vacation homes in Aspen during Enron's halcyon days.

Question: What happens to Lay's conviction?

Answer: Lay's conviction might be expunged, says criminal law professor Peter Henning in a fascinating post on the White Collar CrimeProf blog. Citing Fifth Circuit law (the federal jurisdiction encompassing Houston), Henning says that when a defendant dies before appellate review of a conviction, the death "abates, ab initio, the entire criminal proceeding." In a recent Fifth Circuit decision, United States v. Estate of Parsons, the court explained that "the appeal does not just disappear, and the case is not merely dismissed. Instead, everything associated with the case is extinguished, leaving the defendant as if he had never been indicted or convicted." The Fifth Circuit explained the rationale for the rule: "The finality principle reasons that the state should not label one as guilty until he has exhausted his opportunity to appeal. The punishment principle asserts that the state should not punish a dead person or his estate."

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Peace
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:18 PM

So, has the autopsy shown what caused the heart attack?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Jul 06 - 11:21 PM

So, was he a good Lay or a bad Lay?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Wincing Devil
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 12:03 AM

Conspiracy Theory #2 (Snarfed from SlashDot):

He was offed before he could spill the beans.

Reality:

He's pumpinmg gas, Elvis is checking the oil, Jimmy Hoffa is putting air in the tires

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Peace
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 12:17 AM

That shoots it in the foot. We all know Hoffa's in the trunk.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: dianavan
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 12:28 PM

"The punishment principle asserts that the state should not punish a dead person or his estate."

That explains everything.

It was a favour to his family.

As conspiracy theories go, it was probably the wife.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: Ebbie
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 12:35 PM

Obeying the letter of that law makes no sense whatever if that means that the victims of his fraudulent dealings are left without recourse. Since he was convicted of crookedness - never mind the appelate court - why does not that verdict hold?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 12:57 PM

Because he hasn't been able to take complete advantage of his defendant rights. Being dead means he is denied the right of appeal.

I don't think there was a murder here. Suicide, maybe. But not a murder. He has already testified (quite combatively, I might add) and spilled as many beans as he was going to spill. They have really good lawyers--best money can buy.

The only thing that really burns me is that the story of the biggest fraud case in history was so cynically back-burnered by the conglomerate media.

The victims of his fraudelent dealings never stood a chance of collecting a dime from Lay, and they won't from Skilling, either.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: gnu
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 03:19 PM

And... who ID the body?

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Jul 06 - 03:38 PM

Aspen sheriff.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST,innocent bystander
Date: 07 Jul 06 - 02:54 AM

Once his wife was interviewed (Sixty Minutes) and tearfully said they were "struggling for liquidity".
And now he has been liquidated.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: kendall
Date: 07 Jul 06 - 04:56 PM

It will keep him from testifying against other crooks at Enron.

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: katlaughing
Date: 08 Jul 06 - 09:13 AM

I cannot believe the following from his minister in Houston. He's actually comparing him to MLK and JFK!

Lawson said he hopes to comfort the family with the thought that history can rehabilitate a person's image.

``I plan to tell them this is not the first time somebody good has been falsely accused and even crucified,'' Lawson said today in an interview before leaving for Aspen.

``Just like Martin Luther King and John F. Kennedy, my hope is that people will view Ken Lay in a much more positive light after his death. Even though people say he's a robber and a crook and that it's a good thing he's dead, we have the right to tell his family we've seen this (vilification) before, and history can be kind.''

Subject: RE: Obit: Enron's Ken Lay (Bush's Kenny Boy)
From: GUEST
Date: 26 Oct 06 - 09:05 PM

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/business/4265806.html

Do you folks really think Lay is dead? Faking death was the best way to make sure he and his family kept the money. When the CIA changes the identity of a spy, it's called "sheep-dipping." That's what happened to Lay. He's playing golf somewhere, and his money goes to the family.