MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

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MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

17 Aug 19 - 11:49 AM (#4004852)
Subject: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

So I know MOM is not happy being stuffed up on a shelf in Max's tech closet while he struggles with the Robot Gremlins who have developed an unhealthy interest in Our Dear Mother, but we must keep the spirit of the thread afloat. If this doesn't grow too long I may be able to transfer it over to MOM once the fix is made.

The usual suspects are invited to continue the long-running conversation. Anyone who drops in to bash MOM or cast shade on this noble enterprise may find themselves getting a bum's rush out the door. This is BS of the highest quality and the main thread contains superb fiction, songs, and poetry that snuck in inadvertently. The HTML tricks are astounding. Our late great Amos left many pearls of wisdom, and BWL wrote one of the funniest short stories I have ever had to pleasure to spit my drink on my screen while reading. We still miss Chongo et al.

MOAB's amanuensis
59139, in case anyone is counting.

17 Aug 19 - 01:24 PM (#4004864)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I'm glad to see this make-do thread, Stilly. I was worried that Mom might run out of gin before the problem could be solved. With no way to get more booze to her, things could have gotten ugly pretty quickly. A 59,000+ post thread with a serious case of delerium tremens is not something to sneeze at.

By the way, did you know there once was a town in California called "Delerium Tremens"? Someone with no sense of humor renamed it "Omega".

Makes me wonder if there might be a town called "Acid Flashback" somewhere.

17 Aug 19 - 02:27 PM (#4004869)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Google Earth says "We couldn't understand this question." The closest result that would render on the map was Flaschencontainer, Germany. (50^o08'46.52" N 6^o30'05.58")

17 Aug 19 - 03:06 PM (#4004879)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

"Flaschencontainer" translates as "bottle container". It's not really a town. It's a collection of derelict cargo containers full of Mom's empty gin bottles. It's probably big enough to be a town, but nobody'd want to live there.

17 Aug 19 - 05:42 PM (#4004895)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: keberoxu

And you know, don't you all,
that there is a town named
"Truth or Consequences"?

The television show of the same name ran a contest of some kind,
before I was born I believe.
The states in the Continental US,
their towns were eligible to enter,
and...i forget the conditions.

The winner was a town called Hot Springs New Mexico;
ever since then it has been
Truth or Consequences, New Mexico.
Mostly they grow poblano chiles down there,
on the banks of the Rio Grande.

And those who aren't in the know are utterly bewildered
by references to a New Mexico Town called

Tee or Cee,
written out "T or C",
which some people mistake for "Torc."

as in,
where the heck is Torc New Mexico??

17 Aug 19 - 09:36 PM (#4004909)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Wow, Keb, I knew there was a town called Truth or Consequences, New Mexico, but I didn't know the circumstances of its naming.

And there are some who think Mom is NOT a bountiful fount of useful information!

18 Aug 19 - 07:05 PM (#4005022)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I wonder if duck dogs and Chongo and others will be able to find this thread? The other one engaged so many particles of energy (too bad Amos isn't here to talk about energy and mass) they landed on it perfectly. This one is like landing on an ice cube in the ocean instead of the MOAB ice sheet. Yeah, I know, mixed metaphors. The quality of BS is sometimes strained. :)

19 Aug 19 - 11:34 AM (#4005121)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Acme doesn't have a Steep Cow's Face in the metadata? Shame. That would take care of the steep slippery road with ruts.

20 Aug 19 - 12:28 PM (#4005244)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Heat index is so high here that MOM pulled the car out of the garage and put sheets of cookies to bake on the dashboard.

21 Aug 19 - 07:52 PM (#4005420)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Jane's Rainbow is shy of 6,500 posts and it's back. Here's hoping MOM rises like a Phoenix soon. She's feeling very confined around a thread that just broke two digits.

22 Aug 19 - 01:57 PM (#4005525)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Maybe we can make MOM feel a bit less confined by using BIG fonts to make this thread look roomier.

Or inserting lots of unnecessary line breaks.

Or... sticking... useless... ellipses... between... words....

Or
by
centering
each
word
individually
so
the
post
goes
way
down
the
page.

23 Aug 19 - 12:19 PM (#4005640)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

No cuir a-steach mòran de bhriseadh loidhne neo-riatanach.

No ... a ’steigeadh ... gun fheum ... ellipses ... eadar ... faclan ....

Air neo

le

meadhanachadh

gach fear

facal

fa leth

mar sin

an

dreuchd

falbh

dòigh

sìos

an

duilleag.

Scots Gaelic

23 Aug 19 - 05:15 PM (#4005677)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom! Wake up! This is important!

I live someplace with a name!

Up here in the northern end of Santa Rosa County, Florida, we don't have a lot of incorporated towns. In fact, there's only one of them and it's very small. What we have a good number of are "communities". A community is the rural equivalent of an urban or suburban neighborhood.

While there are several named communities nearby, the clump of homesteads and small farms in which I live has never had an official name... until today! There is now a sign (on the same signpost which holds the speed limit sign) informing anyone who cares that this is the "Walling Community". That's also the name of our road, so no extra points for creativity to whoever decided on the name.

I'm waiting to see how long it will be before the first bullet hole appears in the sign.

23 Aug 19 - 08:52 PM (#4005693)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Did the US Post Office insist on this community having a name? What name do you use for mail, or does it all go to a post office box someplace distant?

24 Aug 19 - 09:10 AM (#4005722)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Raggytash

To misquote William Shakespeare, the famous bard of England

"If music be the food of love ............... why can't rabbits sing"

Discuss.

24 Aug 19 - 09:57 AM (#4005723)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Rabbits can sing, but they've learned to resist the urge. It attracts predators. If you've ever heard a rabbit being caught by a cat or snake, you've heard it singing. Some think the sound is a scream of pain or fear, but it's actually the rabbit saying, "Oh well, I'm a goner. Might as well sing."

Stilly, our community names have no legal status. Some, but not all, are census-designated places. And our mail comes from a good-sized town 20 miles away.

24 Aug 19 - 03:53 PM (#4005751)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I was working in an National Recreation Area campground many years ago when I heard a huge ruckus up the hill in the clover - the field was the area over the campground septic tanks so it was only grass and clover, and there was a baby bunny giving off a high-pitched squeal as a baby weasel was trying to grab it and they were rolling around as the mother bunny was thumping and grunting nearby, wanting to chase off the weasel. Being a tall human being looking down at this noisy tableau, I felt like a giant bending over and picking up the baby bunny as the weasel dropped off and ran into the clover. Mom still thumping a few more steps, and the baby making a gawdawful racket in my hand, and I'm thinking people are going to look up here and wonder what on earth I'm doing.

Then the baby stopped squalling, I guess figuring I was too big to defend itself against, and the mom stopped. I looked at the baby and found no serious injuries, just a little weasel slobber, so I put baby down next to mom and shooed them off away from the weasel's direction of travel.

Some days later some children came over to my ranger booth with a bloodied broken-necked baby rabbit, telling me they'd rescued it from a weasel and could I help it. I carried the baby and as we walked back to the campsite and I told them about the earlier event, and said that the difference was that this bunny couldn't survive it's injuries, and that the nature of the campground was such that there were lots of bunnies so they'd survive despite the weasels that ate them, and the weasels are as important as the rabbits. By the time we got back to the site the children (age 10 and under) understood that I had to give the baby bunny back to the weasel and it could feed it's babies. The parents were harder to convince than the children. If no one had been around I'd have dispatched the baby, but I wasn't going to be forever in those children's minds as the ranger who killed baby bunnies.

25 Aug 19 - 11:49 PM (#4005873)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Not BS, but an old friend of mine called on Friday night asking for my research help on a particular type of scabies parasite that she first saw on her dog and then on herself, and as she described what she sees and where it has spread and the conspiracy of silence that she is meeting as she tries to report it and that she now sees on other people and in all of her food and under the varnish of the furniture and climbing the walls ("I hope it doesn't eat the art work!") and that her fridge is full of "evidence of contamination" and she hadn't eaten for three days, I realized 1) this was a call from a friend having a schizophrenic crisis and 2) that was the most scary-ass story I have ever heard and no wonder the human race is so fascinated by scary stories.

I woke up realizing I must have processed the information in my dreams because I literally sat up and thought this was a cry for help and this scary story is her reality right now, so I had to act.

I sent email early that morning to her daughter, subject "This is your mother's friend Maggie" and told her I had talked to her mother and I thought she needed help and included my contact information. She called a few minutes later, because someone else her mother had asked for help was the mother of one of her friends and knew her well enough to call late at night. She asked questions and I was able to tell her that the crisis seems to have been at its worst starting three days ago and, if the only way to get her to go into care is to be sure the dog is well taken care of (how many people forego things for themselves for the love of their pets?) that I would drive four states away and bring her dog back here. She was my go-to person to tell me what I needed to know about Labrador retrievers when Zeke came to live with me, she knows I will care for him well. She has an elderly ailing husband, but she has friends so I doubt it will come to that, but I will make the drive if that will assure her cooperation in getting treatment.

I'm posting it here because I was equally horrified and fascinated by the story she was telling me; she's a retired English professor with the full weight of a rigorous education behind this delusion and it came with citations. Literally - she cited a Thomas Pynchon novel that it felt like. (I've ordered The Crying of Lot 49 because I haven't read it but think it might give me a glimpse of what is going on in her poor troubled head right now.

MOM was listening on the extension and didn't say a word, just sat there wide-eyed with amazement.

27 Aug 19 - 12:02 AM (#4005955)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

She's doing better, is aware of what happened, but will still need to take medications the rest of her life. And her daughter and I both hope she'll write this story and turn it into a hit SciFi novel. Creepy!

I added the old count, plus one, to the bottom of the first post on this thread.

27 Aug 19 - 10:10 PM (#4006113)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

I have returned for a few days from Wallops Island, Virginia. Yes, Wallops Island, where NASA shoots rockets into space. I was offered the position of lighting the fuse on the next one (in October, a biggie) but I can't be there to do it. I asked and was told that I could have a fuse six inches long because I would be a guest AND a butane lighter with which to ignite it. It will be an orbital shot of a Minotaur rocket.

Amos is gone to wherever he went but if you like I can discuss mass and energy until the cows come home and ever after. Shall I start?

27 Aug 19 - 11:03 PM (#4006125)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

NO, YOU SHALL NOT START!

28 Aug 19 - 12:28 PM (#4006217)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Didn't you arrange to have some of your ashes shot into space? Are they trying to put you ahead of schedule?

29 Aug 19 - 02:25 PM (#4006426)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: keberoxu

Hi, MOM.
Another termite dared to show itself
on the wall-to-wall carpet of my living room.
It didn't last long.

29 Aug 19 - 08:13 PM (#4006470)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Hey, K! Them's good eatin'!

Mom, I'm trying to get a property tax appeal to the State Tax Commission done before I leave on Tuesday afternoon next for Ire***d (I don't want to say where for fear of making other envious) until the end of September. I shall endeavor to bring you back a bottle of Dingle Whiskey and if need be I'll drink it for you. I'd do that and that's what makes me your favorite: self-sacrifice and caring for others.

29 Aug 19 - 10:08 PM (#4006475)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: keberoxu

So that's why Rapparee went off to an immersion course in spoken Gaelic ...

30 Aug 19 - 09:10 PM (#4006612)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Maybeeee.... And maybe that's why he and his wife are seriously considering a couple of weeks immersed in Irish (the language AND the whiskey) in Ballyferriter next spring, or perhaps spend a couple of weeks with a teacher somewhere around Sligo or Limerick. Of course, the fact that her family teach Irish has nothing to do with it, nor do the 20,000 Mosin-Nagant rifles my family tried to deliver to Roger Casement back in 1916 and which are taking up a lot of room in the house (and are a real pain in the back end to move every time we've changed houses).

31 Aug 19 - 10:06 AM (#4006668)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I should learn some Spanish and visit Mexico. I found this on Wikipedia:

I see the US site for the beer has a recipe for BLT Tostadas. I'd drink beer with that.

31 Aug 19 - 01:45 PM (#4006699)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

If you were to tell 100 Donald Trump supporters that the reason Hurricane Dorian is now expected to turn away from Florida is that Trump flew down to Palm Beach and bravely stood on the lawn at Mar-a-Lago while pounding the butt of his magic staff against the ground and screaming "You shall not pass!!!!" at the oncoming Category 4 Hurricane, how many would believe you?

31 Aug 19 - 03:30 PM (#4006704)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

If they read the newspaper or listen to the news they know he's at Camp David - he will pay to repair the resort with taxpayer dollars but he won't hang out in it during the hurricane.

Back to the better quality BS.

31 Aug 19 - 04:18 PM (#4006706)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Aw, come on... Trump operating under the delusion that he's Gandalf is pretty good BS.

On second thought, maybe it isn't. Maybe Trump really thinks he is Gandalf. He already operates under so many other delusions that it can't be completely discounted.

31 Aug 19 - 10:14 PM (#4006733)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Maybe he IS Gandalf. Stranger things have occurred. Why, I told the good parish priest that I had auto-canonized and henceforth should be known as "St. Michael the Annoying, Patron Saint of Heretics."

He wasn't amused, but did own that if anyone filled that bill it would be me.

01 Sep 19 - 09:34 AM (#4006777)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Since I wasn't raised in a Catholic household, my chances of being made a saint are pretty close to zero. That is regretful.

On the other hand, being a non-Catholic does allow one to skip over the sainthood step and go straight to Supreme Being.

01 Sep 19 - 09:40 AM (#4006778)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

At most Trump might aim at being Radagast, but frankly, he's like Sauruman without a plan.

01 Sep 19 - 10:42 AM (#4006796)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: keberoxu

It would be well to go back and
look at your Silmarillion.

After all, the wizards started out fighting,
not Sauron of the evil eye,
but the unmentionable Morgoth.

And Morgoth/Melkor is the one who manufactured the Balrog, not Sauron.
...ahh, never mind ...

01 Sep 19 - 06:56 PM (#4006868)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I wasn't going that far back. We're not talking about ultimate power, we're talking about a power grab by a nasty git.

01 Sep 19 - 09:30 PM (#4006881)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Prit near all the original saints started out as non-Catholic. Heck, the Original 12, all the Marys, and the Big Guy Hisself were all Jews.

Good, I found my scissors AND my pliers right here on my desk! My mind is...somewhere around here.

But as I was saying earlier, if indeed E=mC² (and it does), then C=vE/m. This, however, ignores Time, which has been colloquially called the "Fourth Dimension." But as mass distorts the fabric of space and time, a new geometry is needed which, unlike Euclidian, Lobachevsky-Bolyai-Gauss, and Riemannian geometries, requires another axis for Time. Thus the Universe, already distorted by mass, becomes not only more quantumized, but more fractalized (if I may be so bold as to create a new word). You can then clearly see that any ?_? would YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE. THIS CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO CONTINUE. YOUR FRIEND, THE GALACTIC OVERLORD.

02 Sep 19 - 09:41 AM (#4006958)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I posted a remark on Bonzo's greyhound thread and had to stop to think - was I posting to MOAB or someplace else?

BWL, It's a testament to your big heart in not holding your injuries and recuperation against the happy pooch. Same here with Zeke - accidents happen and we learn to watch out for the dog direction of travel that sometimes illustrate too well the Newton's law of motion, where the acceleration of a smaller solid body colliding with a larger human body results in the transfer of energy and your sudden acceleration to the ground.

If we ever get our hands on MOM MOAB, there are some great dog stories, and one of the funniest I've ever read was BWL describing the neighbor trying to find his dog.

02 Sep 19 - 08:43 PM (#4007042)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Och, Mither dear, it's off to Ireland I am tomorra afternoon if the hurrycane permits. We'll be after flyin' out of Charlotte, North Carolina and while that's a bit inland the winds and rain won't be knowin' that! And ye can see how well I've been after learnin' the Irish! Erin go braless!

03 Sep 19 - 03:40 PM (#4007181)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: keberoxu

Stilly, the label on the beverage you were describing.

Spanish is a language I respect more than I comprehend.
All that Latin can make the language extremely intricate,
and that's leaving out the Moorish/Arabic influence.
Your post focused on the word "modelo."
The word that always makes me have to stop and think
is not "modelo"
but "etiqueta,"
as in "etiqueta negra."
Different, but very similar in the ways they are used
in language on labels.

04 Sep 19 - 10:17 AM (#4007304)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I heard some wonk on NPR this morning talking about the war in Yemen. He said that efforts needed to be "redoubled... redoubled". Yes, he said "redoubled" twice.

Now, if to double something means to do it two times, then to redouble it must mean to do it two times, and then two times again. So, to redouble means to do it four times.

Therefore, "redouble... redouble" would mean to do it four times four times. That's sixteen times! Wow! That's a lot!

04 Sep 19 - 10:40 AM (#4007310)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Exponential growth!

From Wikipedia: Its ubiquitous occurrence in pure and applied mathematics has led mathematician W. Rudin to opine that the exponential function is "the most important function in mathematics".

04 Sep 19 - 01:35 PM (#4007335)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I used to be a proponent, then I became an opponent, now I'm an ex-ponent. I divorced myself from the whole situation.

05 Sep 19 - 09:46 AM (#4007446)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I've checked on MOM every couple of days; she's still closed for repairs. :-(

05 Sep 19 - 10:10 AM (#4007449)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom wants to know this:

If your last name is Ford, can you buy a Chevrolet dealership and call it "Ford Chevrolet"?

05 Sep 19 - 04:54 PM (#4007507)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

We're gonna have to throw a little party here - Pepper tested negative for heartworm today! I brought her home in June 2018 and we were using the "slow kill" method that the shelter uses on any of it's HW positive dogs. It worked and now she's free to race around to her heart's content. MOM needs to run by Cabela's and buy her a new bumper, the old ones are pretty torn up.

08 Sep 19 - 04:25 PM (#4007836)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Greetings from Muireach on the Dingle Peninsula! Ah, the whiskey, the music and the craic!

08 Sep 19 - 06:28 PM (#4007855)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Sounds nice!

I'm going to be reinforcing the ceilings in a hall and at least one room, to be safe rather than sorry. The tape lines have pulled as the house shifts on this dodgy foundation. MOM says it's because of all of the holes the dogs have dug in the back yard, but it wasn't the case. They did make an unlevel mess of the PVC greenhouse out back, digging under one end of it.

08 Sep 19 - 11:41 PM (#4007969)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

A PVC greenhouse? You mean you can grow PVC in a greenhouse? Do you have any idea how much money I've given Lowe's and Home Depot for PVC pipe over the years? I could have been growing it in my very own greenhouse instead!

09 Sep 19 - 12:09 PM (#4008086)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Indeed! Though growing a glass greenhouse would be more environmentally prudent.

09 Sep 19 - 08:43 PM (#4008195)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Actually, we have a small greenhouse whose frame is made of PVC. It's an octagonal dome we call "The Igloo". (My wife dreams up weird projects and then makes me figure out how to build them.)

We also have a much larger greenhouse made from the tubular steel frame of an old 10' X 20' portable garage.

Both are currently covered with screen cloth for shade and insect control. The clear plastic will go on around Halloween.

09 Sep 19 - 10:03 PM (#4008197)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I was reading the Fairbanks, Alaska newspaper over the weekend (don't ask me why, it just strikes my fancy) and they did an article about local gardens, and I noticed they all had that high-quality almost clear panels, sometimes just around the sides, and others of them completely over the top. I can't find it now, and it might have been a video in a story that I'm thinking of. Pretty interesting, the growing season is shorter but the days are so much longer they get some pretty good crops.

10 Sep 19 - 01:03 PM (#4008245)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Rapparee

Alaska grows whopper plants.

10 Sep 19 - 01:20 PM (#4008251)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bee-dubya-ell

What? Whoppers grow on plants in Alaska?

Do they have Big Mac plants too?

10 Sep 19 - 02:22 PM (#4008255)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

Wrong category. He meant the malted milk balls, not the hamburgers.

11 Sep 19 - 11:40 PM (#4008458)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I had two trees cut down last weekend; one was a very large pine in the front yard that I didn't want to fall on the house in a windstorm, the other was a vitex (purple chaste) in the back yard managing to grow into all of the power lines and cables (I thought I'd put it far enough away - who knew?)

Two different artists have stopped by the house asking for pieces of the pine at the curb (waiting for trash pickup). One is a blacksmith who needs it next to his anvil, the other has a daughter who makes glass art and she needs the chunks of wood as bases to mount her rods that support her glass. MOM was so tickled to see the blacksmith; he arrived via skateboard (he lives 2 blocks up the hill from here) - he shifted a very large piece (24" tall by about 16" across) onto the skateboard and took off pushing it up the hill.

15 Sep 19 - 02:36 PM (#4008967)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Bill D

from a couple weeks ago:
"Didn't you arrange to have some of your ashes shot into space?"

I actually knew someone who was given that honor. It was 'technically' illegal, but quietly worked out by some folks at JPL as a tribute to someone they knew. A few people in the folk community know about it, and smile whenever certain names and launches are mentioned.

15 Sep 19 - 04:11 PM (#4008978)
Subject: RE: Mini-MOAB - Mother of All BS annex
From: Stilly River Sage

I pulled some old Kodak Carousel slide trays out of the closet today. Slides. Vacations from years ago. MOM wants to get out the projector and look at all of them. She's making popcorn now.

17 Sep 19 - 10:42 AM (#4009294)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I tweaked the title of this thread because at this rate it isn't going to be so mini, but it is still an annexed space to give MOM's kids a place to congregate without getting into trouble.

20 Sep 19 - 01:39 PM (#4009730)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Sorry to disturb your slumber, Mom, but it's time for a trip back to the top!

20 Sep 19 - 05:42 PM (#4009753)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM was watching me fold and hang up clean laundry this afternoon, and told me she likes the message on the t-shirt that says I was normal three dogs ago.

21 Sep 19 - 11:05 AM (#4009834)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Perhaps that t-shirt was on my mind because today I'm going to go look at the dogs at the city shelter. MOM wants to go along with a bag of dog treats and give each of them a treat as we pass by the kennels.

21 Sep 19 - 05:51 PM (#4009868)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

We are just over an hour into the integration of a new boxer/pitbull puppy into the household. The Blue Heeler is jealous, the Labrador retriever doesn't care. The puppy is rolling over for everyone and has already snagged her collar on the drawer pull in the kitchen, in the nick of time I was able to avoid tragic consequences of that. MOM says she doesn't want dogs on the furniture but I think she's going to be busy trying to keep this one off.

22 Sep 19 - 07:26 PM (#4009968)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Mazel tov and congrats
on the new pack member, Oh Alpha Dog.

23 Sep 19 - 12:42 PM (#4010044)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I may have valuable informaton, or not, for Max to know regarding the abilities/access of an internet hacker who may be respondsible for Mudcat intrusions and mischief. Shall I access Max by way other than PM?

23 Sep 19 - 04:10 PM (#4010084)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Max@mudcat.org will send it to his preferred email. Thanks.

26 Sep 19 - 10:39 PM (#4010726)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The new dog is starting to fit in as far as the other two are concerned, but she still has a long way to go as far as growing up and not chewing up everything around the house. MOM had to lock up all of her shoes after a right shoe and a left shoe of two different pairs were destroyed and she decided to wear the remaining shoes out in public. A Cole Haan loafer and a Jimmy Choo high heel look strange together.

27 Sep 19 - 02:33 PM (#4010826)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Bon voyage home, Rapparee.

28 Sep 19 - 06:47 AM (#4010898)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM, pray for me! I’m in INDIANA!

29 Sep 19 - 04:48 PM (#4011115)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

MOM, a week or two ago
I met an acquaintance who has a service dog.
Big strapping young male black Labrador Retriever, the dog is.
Well and expensively trained, knows what he ought to do.

I guess I am an evil influence on dogs like this one.
When I greeted man and dog,
I went down into a kneel-crouch to say hello to the dog,
who had his service-dog harness on.

And right away the dog's "inner puppy" came out,
and he wanted to PLAY PLAY PLAY!
So now I have to stay a discreet distance from my acquaintance and his service buddy,
because my very presence
makes the dog want to jump on people and
bounce up and down,
and bark, and lick faces, and all that.

Naughty, naughty me.

29 Sep 19 - 08:15 PM (#4011147)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I escaped from Indiana and I'm HOME!! Tired, and my coat has bullet holes from where the guards shot at me, but I escaped more or less unharmed. It's a good thing we had pre-purchased airplane tickets or they would have taken me at the ticket counter. But I fooled 'em and got home with little or no mishap. Oh, sure, I did have to take out that one guard but he was less than six feet eight inches and didn't really count. Now I must go upstairs and get a very small percentage of the total laundry out of the dryer.

29 Sep 19 - 08:43 PM (#4011152)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Always ask first if you can pet a service animal; that said, there are a lot of bogus "service" animals out there in public with people these days. They can buy the bibs on Amazon and they don't train their dogs to even fake being well-behaved.

And that said, I have a puppy who chews lots of stuff and has to do regular cooling-down periods in her crate, though today one of the big dogs was egging her on. Pepper was squeaking Cookie's toy and not letting Cookie have it when she pulled on it (they usually do) and Cookie in return jumped all over Zeke and bit at his poor tender ears. He doesn't cry often, but he complained about that treatment of his velvety ears. Cookie is in time out right now but the toy is in with her so I'm hearing lots of squeaking. MOM took a bottle of Scotch and a glass and headed out onto the porch.

30 Sep 19 - 02:27 PM (#4011249)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Amos had me go through and copy his poems for him then hide them; I suppose they can be restored and saved but you know that is a HUGE job, correct? Opening the entire MOAB in mudelf format?

30 Sep 19 - 03:59 PM (#4011264)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I already have done so. Here is an except:

V2hlbiBpbiBkaXNncmFjZSB3aXRoIGZvcnR1bmUgYW5kIG1lbidzIGV5ZXMgSSBhbGwgYWx
vbmUgYmV3ZWVwIG15IG91dGNhc3Qgc3RhdGUgYW5kIHRyb3VibGUgZGVhZiBoZWF2ZW4gd
2l0aCBteSBib290bGVzcyBjcmllcyBhbmQgbG9vayB1cG9uIG15c2VsZiBhbmQgY3Vyc2U
gbXkgZmF0ZSBoYXBseSBkbyBJIHRoaW5rIG9uIHRoZWUgYW5kIHRoZW4gbXkgaGVhcnQgb
GlrZSB0aGUgbGFyayBmcm9tIHRoZSBzdWxsZW4gZWFydGggYXJpc2luZyBzaW5ncyBoeW1
ucyBhdCBoZWF2ZW5zIGdhdGUu

And that's just a small sample of all of Mom.

Damn, you nearly broke the Internet with that side-ways scrolling. I added line breaks. ---grumpy mudelf

30 Sep 19 - 05:32 PM (#4011277)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm only 19, I'm only 19 but I'm a god damn Marine
and I'm ordered to arrest the Prez but I don't know
I'm told he's hold up at Mara Lago and won't let go
Now there's crooks with Nazi looks shooting my way

Outside I neutralized heavy militia automatic fire
I've been ordered to detain my commander and chief
I'm on point and don't see relief it feels like a movie
All I was briefed is that his only weapon is that he's a liar

I've been ordered but I don't know if the Prez will ever show
OMG there he is in a huge kitchen slumped at the refridgerator door.
I looked down on him slumped on the floor my weapon locked and loaded
You're under arest I croaked and he said
"I'm not the one you're looking for"...

02 Oct 19 - 10:45 AM (#4011541)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm the heartless owner of a Havahart trap, in which I catch mice (they go into a tall bucket of water) or toads (they are released). Mom wants to use salami to bait it, I've been using peanut butter. Since we're in the city and they're so small, there is no lead in use, just water.

02 Oct 19 - 11:26 AM (#4011550)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I used too much water and sadly drowned a chipmunk.

02 Oct 19 - 02:33 PM (#4011592)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There has only ever been one critter at a time in the trap, so it isn't a matter of an accidental drowning.

02 Oct 19 - 05:08 PM (#4011618)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

3 Hardest things to say;

I'M SORRY
I NEED HELP
Worstesshire? worcestershire sauce

02 Oct 19 - 05:25 PM (#4011628)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Around the house it is referred to (fondly) as What's It Shit? Sauce.

02 Oct 19 - 09:11 PM (#4011656)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Hi Mom!I was (very) briefly in touch with Khandu today!

Did I mention I have sprained right foot (Podiatrist visit this past Monday), a visit to the dentist today (cleaning, etc. with a bigger thing later this month), an ultrasound tomorrow, a dexascan (bone density) next Monday, and a CT scan next Wednesday? And this coming Saturday we'll be hosting a memorial service at our house for a friend who died whilst we were in Ireland?

Mom, we go aware to the doctors and medical types can't get us! (Can't do anything about friends dying whether we're here or afar.)

02 Oct 19 - 09:18 PM (#4011658)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I've had to round up the new dog toys; Pepper had a hidden trait we didn't see till now—she doesn't share toys well. She'll play, but then it becomes hyper-real and she hunkers down, hoarding them, and she had the puppy squealing bloody murder this afternoon. One more episode and that was enough, they're all bagged and on top of the refrigerator.

03 Oct 19 - 08:08 PM (#4011811)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Does Pepper suppose that the toys are her flock of sheep??

03 Oct 19 - 08:59 PM (#4011821)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

She supposes something - she's a blue heeler, so her brain is busy working out how to keep all of the toys under her control.

Today Zeke and Cookie raced around so much I finally parked Cookie in her crate to give Zeke a break. They've been doing it again this evening. Without toys to play with other dogs are the next best thing!

03 Oct 19 - 10:10 PM (#4011823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MÓM, Í've léárnéd tó úsé ÁLT códés tó máké fádás!

04 Oct 19 - 09:08 PM (#4011964)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

öth®r th쳌ngs ˜aº wÜll!

04 Oct 19 - 09:26 PM (#4011968)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM, it's Friday! Even retired, I still love Fridays!

05 Oct 19 - 09:21 PM (#4012094)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, that's over. The wake went well -- about 50 people or so crowded into our little cottage. Everyone seemed to have a good time, AND nobody set fire to the thatch!

06 Oct 19 - 09:19 PM (#4012287)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

How solemn and beautiful is the thought that the earliest pioneer of civilization, the van-leader of civilization, is never the steamboat, never the railroad, never the newspaper, never the Sabbath-school, never the missionary -- but always whiskey! Such is the case. Look history over; you will see. The missionary comes after the whiskey -- I mean he arrives after the whiskey has arrived; next comes the poor immigrant, with ax and hoe and rifle; next, the trader; next, the miscellaneous rush; next, the gambler, the desperado, the highwayman, and all their kindred in sin of both sexes; and next, the smart chap who has bought up an old grant that covers all the land; this brings the lawyer tribe; the vigilance committee brings the undertaker. All these interests bring the newspaper; the newspaper starts up politics and a railroad; all hands turn to and build a church and a jail -- and behold! civilization is established forever in the land. But whiskey, you see, was the van-leader in this beneficent work. It always is. It was like a foreigner -- and excusable in a foreigner -- to be ignorant of this great truth, and wander off into astronomy to borrow a symbol. But if he had been conversant with the facts, he would have said: Westward the Jug of Empire takes its way. -- Samuel L. Clemens

07 Oct 19 - 09:15 PM (#4012448)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Faghaimse díreach brí chun buaite
Is feidhm id chaíntse a bhrídeach bhuartha.
Feicím, is is dóigh gur dóite an radharc liom,
Síolrach Órfhlaith Mhóire is Mheidhbhe,
An seifteoir caol is an créatúr cladhartha,
An ceisteoir claon is an déirceoir daigheartha,
Sú na táire is tál na coimse
Ag súil le sárfhuil sámh na saoithe.
Achtáimid mar dlí do bhéithe
An seacht faoi thrí gan chuibhreach céile
Do tharraing ar cheann go teann gan trua
Is a cheangal don chrann seo i dteannta an tuama.
Bainigí lom de a chabhail is a chóta,
Is feannaigí a dhroim is a choim le córda.
An chuid acu tharla báite i mblianta
Is cheileas go táir an tairne tiarpa,
Chuireas amú gan subhachas d’éinne
Buile na hútha is lúth a ngéaga,
Do mhilleas a gcáil is fáil ar bhean acu
Ag feitheamh gan fáth ar bharr na craoibhe,
Fágaim fúibhse tionscal páise
A mhná na dúile dúbhadh le háilíos;
Ceapaigí fír-nimh tinte is tairní,
Caithigí smaointe is intleacht mhná leis,
Cuirigí bhur gcomhairle i gcomhar le chéile,
Is tugaimse cumhachta an fórsa dhéanamh.
Beirim gan spás díbh páis na gciantach,—
Is beag liom bás gan barrghoin pian dóibh.

07 Oct 19 - 11:30 PM (#4012453)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM is pleased to see that you've learned a new skill, Rap. Those accented vowels are looking good.

08 Oct 19 - 09:33 AM (#4012512)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Our fáda, who art in Irish, annoying be thy name! (Old Irish Prayer about accented vowels.)

I also got a book called "500 Mallatacth Ort." It's a collection of curses in Irish and English and boy are there some doozies! "May you be stricken with diarrhea and a bout of sneezing at the same time!" "The devil eat you and spit you out because of the taste!" "Your waste lay crosswise inside you!" "Exorbitant rent to you!" "Crusts and scabs to your crotch!" One I heard years ago: "May the grass grow long before your door" -- and it's pretty bad when you think about it.

08 Oct 19 - 09:23 PM (#4012626)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I am so sorry that no one else save SRS seems to care. Have other and drown your cares.

08 Oct 19 - 11:14 PM (#4012628)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That "waste lay crosswise" - whew! An ancient illustration of constipation. Ugg.

09 Oct 19 - 11:52 AM (#4012711)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A compendium of my unique and strange ideas, some of have become realities:

For the deaf, a device to bypass all the mechanical detection structures of sound and feed neural electric audio impulses directly to the brain. While the concept was good my method was external and caused synthesesia, The surgical implantation of an input directly into the cochleah was the final solution. ( in use today )

For the autistic, an enzyme to help remove the universal initial duplication of all neural functions in young autistic brains. ( not explored )

For MS patients a cloning process of myelynial shaft cells and infusion of the cells into the spinal fluid. (partialy tried )

Carbon foam material for acoustic instruments.

In cosmology a concept that all things are transmutable. Not just e=mc2 but even space time and matter into space inside energetic black holes.

air conditioned pillows so the head powers its pump

video phone door bells

how to counteract Russian troll anguish and confusion

Evidence of hypnosis pehnomena in religious pracctices.

Specialized use of Oxytocin

Further research into Amazonian Cubensis.

more as time allows

10 Oct 19 - 06:29 PM (#4012954)
Subject: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Okay then.

100!!!

11 Oct 19 - 07:17 AM (#4013010)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

100 annex posts = 60,000 MOAB posts that chronicled 30 years?

11 Oct 19 - 02:37 PM (#4013091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Have we lost all of our imaginary creatures?

11 Oct 19 - 03:20 PM (#4013098)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Biden and son are GUILTY of...
I do not know the current Trump conspiracy lies about Biden but it is said the bigger the lie, the more people will believe it. But how big is big?

Hunter Biden was the Grand Ambassador of the Sons of Satan devoted to preventing the second coming

Joe Biden is in league with current alien astronauts who are respondsible for forming the Democratic Party. And if so will deliver mankind into slavery of the entire human race. Ancient Fascist Astronaut theorists agree.

Father and son sodomy?

Treasury theft?

Porn star affairs?

Gathered dirt on Trump from Queens?

11 Oct 19 - 09:59 PM (#4013165)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: GUEST,The Galactic Overlord

FROM: The Galactic Overlord
TO: MOABITES

You thought to confuse me with this Annex! But I have your duckdog and will only set it free if you surrender your Mother Moab to me for my unspeakable pleasures. You may contact me with your answer by texting me at #galacticoverlord.

12 Oct 19 - 02:44 PM (#4013263)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

...it was too good to last, right?

12 Oct 19 - 09:59 PM (#4013310)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You can talk about Lassie and old Rin-Tin-Tin
And Snoopy the beagle, young Charlie's best friend,
Or King of the Mounties, or Benji, quite small,
But Gluon the Duckdog's the best of them all.

Not really a particle, not quite a wave,
We never know how Gluon's apt to behave.
For life's complicated, it's not really simple,
When governed by Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle.

Some say he's made up, just a MOAB invention,
A duckdog who lives in the seventh dimension,
And flies here to there faster than Mighty Mouse,
And sleeps in a teserract-shaped duckdog house.

He navigates wormholes to new galaxies
Where live huge duckdog-eating Thingamazees.
Worse than Bandersnatches, much worse than a Snark,
But he frightens them off with an ear shattering "Quark!"

So here's to our Gluon, oh duckdog supreme,
More than an idea, much more than a meme.
The best darned duckdog in the whole multiverse.
Yes, as duckdogs go, we could have done worse.
--Beedub, way back in the ancient days of 2015

I actually feel sort of sorry for the GO.

13 Oct 19 - 06:15 AM (#4013337)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There is a theory that when gluons gang up and pair up they are respondsible for gravity.
Individually they are nice but a pack f them can be inconcievably viscious.

13 Oct 19 - 08:36 PM (#4013507)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I have received a strange email from gnu. He said that his mum died September 27 and that he was in the hospital in bad shape. No other information.

I responded and asked him what was going on.

13 Oct 19 - 08:52 PM (#4013514)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

gnu's mom.

14 Oct 19 - 11:27 PM (#4013698)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I haven't heard from him, though I sent a note.

MOM will clear a space in the guest room and make him comfortable if he comes to visit.

With detective's hat on I've located enough information to send a card.

15 Oct 19 - 06:52 PM (#4013874)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

I would send our Gnu a card as well,
if I knew where to find his mailing address.

Failing that,
good thoughts and vibes,
as the gallant Rapparee says elsewhere.

17 Oct 19 - 08:57 AM (#4014130)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Someone was trying to deliver Mom's makgeolli and couldn't find the door.

17 Oct 19 - 09:39 AM (#4014136)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

During the hacking months ago The PM section was also involved so that a named member would post messages of a person in a downward emotional spiral and then erase/edit and post different messages.

'They' by the same member name also delivered message boxes that would say "Mudcat has files for you to download"
It would crudely disable computers if clicked upon.

I know much more but no one here believed me.

The best defense was to totally ignore the attack, which I did by not taking the bait.

There was a 4 chan or Russian quality to the hack and was more sophisticated than the 'member name' who actually bragged about his hacking prowess.

17 Oct 19 - 10:17 AM (#4014142)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Careful, Don, this is a BS thread. . .

17 Oct 19 - 06:42 PM (#4014230)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I have hacking prowess. I once split five cords of seasoned hickory, oak and ironwood in one (1) hour using only my spit, hands, and pocketknife. AND I have witnesses to prove it, provided they aren't all dead yet.

17 Oct 19 - 08:50 PM (#4014253)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

After dealing with Ironwood I learned it is harder than Oak.

17 Oct 19 - 08:55 PM (#4014255)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And it weren't none of that straight-grained stuff! Twisted and skewed every whichaway!

18 Oct 19 - 03:30 PM (#4014337)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

It wasn't just MOAB, khandu.
We had to get Jane's Rainbow back as well.

18 Oct 19 - 08:48 PM (#4014364)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Gnu reached out through the Interwebs and his typing is horrible, but it sounds like a couple of more weeks where he is. He fell. Must've been one heckuva tumble.

19 Oct 19 - 03:59 PM (#4014443)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Sounds like a job for the Mudcat Recovery Ward ?

19 Oct 19 - 04:17 PM (#4014449)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

SRS
I have been told to honor confidentiality to admin and now to be careful.
Straight up art, truth and out right humor has been the bread and butter of MOAB in the past but all things must pass eventually.

One point of view does not a magority make but sometimes the magority is wrong. More often I can be wrong about motives but not objective facts.

19 Oct 19 - 05:00 PM (#4014456)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

But you're drifting out of the BS arena, is all I meant.

19 Oct 19 - 05:39 PM (#4014461)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Looks like a real blue norther blowing up!

19 Oct 19 - 10:00 PM (#4014484)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Quarters the size of hailstones!

20 Oct 19 - 10:25 AM (#4014538)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Gnu the inscrutable seems to be feeling better. MOM feels great, now that she has been able to open a window at night and put a blanket over the sheets on the bed. You don't want to know what she's getting up to for Halloween decorations - scares the neighborhood kids shitless. Mostly we see families cross the street to go past the house so they don't trigger the motion detectors.

21 Oct 19 - 09:12 AM (#4014675)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

SRS -- you and all okay?

21 Oct 19 - 01:27 PM (#4014728)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Two doors down there is a halloween decoration we can smell from here.
The house on the corner has a tall fence so they suspended 13 ghosts in a tree that has a skeleton bride and groom underneath along with 22 skeleton guests suspended on folding chairs. A full reception banquet with 20 lbs. of putrified shrimp (the smell) and some huge lobsters for show. 2 skeleton security gate keepers with clipboards both have their skull up their ass. Wedding march music started up last night and has continued all day today. The one thing they are saving for a surprise seems to be the preacher?

I'm thinking of getting a pumpkin next week.

21 Oct 19 - 01:30 PM (#4014730)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Ditto Rapparee to SRS --

did they say TORNADO?

21 Oct 19 - 01:37 PM (#4014735)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ditto Amos to Rap.

Did they say FGS?

Fake Gnu Salad

21 Oct 19 - 02:37 PM (#4014747)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The tornado(s) did a lot of damage in north and east Dallas. If anyone has ever flown into Love Field, you've been in the area. That's about 45 miles east of me.

Once all of the sturm und drang passed, the weather cleared up and it's a fabulous day out for all of those people clearing up tree branches, downed power lines, and exploded buildings.

21 Oct 19 - 08:40 PM (#4014775)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You can get an above-ground tornado shelter for about USD 5K.

22 Oct 19 - 11:26 AM (#4014872)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Yes. It's called the central hallway.

22 Oct 19 - 10:20 PM (#4014938)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Or the southwest corner of the basement, away from windows and with a saw and crowbar (at least).

22 Oct 19 - 11:13 PM (#4014942)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Basement? What basement? This house, like 99% of all other houses in Texas, is on a slab (or they're pier and beam, also no basement).

23 Oct 19 - 09:14 PM (#4015120)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

May I lend you a shovel? An underground storm cellar is best -- can you dig it??? 8-)

24 Oct 19 - 09:10 AM (#4015183)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The real dangers of a tornado to homes is lack of a quick dispersion of high pressure inside a home compared to the low pressure inside a tornado.
Without a pressure release valve, homes explode. Secondly the wind can shift homes on their foundation that causes loss of structural integrity.

A safe room only addresses protection from debris, not keeping one's home intact if hit.

Although there is little to be done in a sudden class 5 tornado, I imagine 2 solutions where no cellar is availlable.

1. Build homes with a cental 10 foot square reinforced wind chimney that connects every floor with 5 foot square wind egress channels that connects to the central chimney.

2. Steel anchor cables attached to bedrock or other underground anchors drape the home to wall and roof netting to hold the home stay put and avoid foundation shift.

This a low cost radical idea that comes from my imagination so feel free to ignore it.

24 Oct 19 - 04:39 PM (#4015231)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

Here's the factoid for the day:

Have you ever noticed that the numbers on calculator keypads and telephone keypads are arranged differently? Have you ever wondered why?

Well, back in the days when touch-tone dialing was being introduced, AT&T's engineers realized that proficient users of office calculators could enter a phone number so fast that the generated tones would "step on each other" resulting in incomplete calls. So, they decided to move the 1,2,3 row from the bottom of the keypad to the top and the 7,8,9 row from the top to the bottom to slow office machine hot-dogs down to manageable speeds.

24 Oct 19 - 04:48 PM (#4015233)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

my Research cure/treatment for MS
Clone ones own mycelial shaft cells and reinject into spinal fluid.

Safe Disposal of nuclear waste - I have no fucking clue.

24 Oct 19 - 06:25 PM (#4015242)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Nuclear waste? Simple: get fusion power plants running and use the fission waste to power them. Rocketing the stuff into the sun would also work, until a rocket blew up on the launch pad or on the way up and out. Or encase it in concrete and stack it in the middle of a desert such as Washington, DC and let those who visit it deal with the consequences of their stupidity (who knows, we may need the stuff later).

24 Oct 19 - 07:34 PM (#4015251)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I think nuclear waste will prove to be a valuable resource in the near future.

When accidental exposure to nuclear waste creates a horde of giant houseflies, we'll need to intentionally expose some spiders to create giant spiders to eat the giant flies. Then, if the giant spiders become a problem, we'll just expose some birds to control them. Then, we'll probably need to expose some cats to eat all the giant birds. And then some dogs to eat the giant cats....

Eventually, all the animals on earth will have eaten each other and, by the time intelligent life evolves again, the remaining nuclear waste will have decayed into harmless sludge.

25 Oct 19 - 06:49 AM (#4015294)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

MOAB is a great suppository for supposition.

26 Oct 19 - 02:50 PM (#4015566)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I suppose.

26 Oct 19 - 04:23 PM (#4015582)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

And for posers.

27 Oct 19 - 09:43 AM (#4015663)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My friend, a fire fighter, would pose with a hose, I suppose.

27 Oct 19 - 11:57 AM (#4015678)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Your friend may be on call to go visit California this week. It seems to be burning down.

27 Oct 19 - 06:46 PM (#4015734)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

His wife, our massage therapist, would worry -- as would his three kids. Pocatello is short firefighters and EMTs -- the other day there were three calls in 15 minu4tes and there would have been no one to respond to a fourth. Same thing in the police. Perhaps because the city pays 14% under the state's average? Because the firefighters' union has endorsed a pro-Union fella for City Council?

28 Oct 19 - 07:48 PM (#4015929)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

We finally got some rain and our shiitake logs expressed their pleasure by putting forth an abundance of delicious mushrooms.

In their honor, I have composed this ditty, to the tune of "We're In the Money".

🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵

We got shiitake, we got shiitake,
We got delicious fungi growin' outta logs,
We got shiitake, that ain't bull hockey,
We just might turn ourselves into shiitake hogs.

You can hear those 'shrooms a sizzlin' in the fryin' pan
Mix 'em in an omelet or a stir fry, man oh man!

We got shiitake, we got shiitake,
We'll even give a few leftovers to the dogs!

🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵

28 Oct 19 - 08:42 PM (#4015930)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Morels.

This is a pretty damned good recipe for mushroom soup. Try it. Even Gluon likes it.

28 Oct 19 - 08:49 PM (#4015931)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I remembered this post....

Subject: From Max: State of the Union Address
From: Max - PM
Date: 11 May 06 - 10:43 PM

I've got to tell you, I'm sick and tired of some of the crap that I've seen lately.

Martin Gibson: you have to pack up and go. Your knowledge and contributions are valuable, and it's a shame that your sociopathy prevents us from hosting you or taking you seriously anymore.

Shambles: I just don't care anymore. You press your point, time after time, until you press too far and then complain about the check. You do this purposefully to prove a point, but in the end, you are a distraction from the real point of this site. You too, should bid farewell.

Joe: Do I need to separate you two?

Americans: We're losing to the Limey's. I attempt to lure American Folk artists, historians, archivists and enthusiasts to the Mudcat, and am repeatedly rejected because the Mudcat is now viewed as an UK Folk Forum. I don't blame the UK'ers, nor wish them to change anything they are doing, however, I'd like a nice balance so not to alienate either.

Members/Users: We've never had a worse year as far as contributions. I am footing the bill for over 50% of the expenses year-to-date. We have maybe a dozen folks that contribute on any sort of consistent basis. I'd like to refuse any further contribution from these folks, because I feel they carry a burden that they need not if I did my job right. I would like to see a whole new set of folks step up to the plate and get us through a month or more. Remember, it does not need to come out of your pocket. We have an international community of like-people here. Items that one may have and not need or want no longer can find a happy home in our auction. You can host a sing and put a tip bucket out. There are a million things you can think of to support this site and it's purpose. Nude calendars, recipes, blackmail…

Max: You need to keep this site running smoothly. These downtimes and outages are unacceptable for a real Website. We want reliability and we want you to fix the duplication and miss-ordered threads. Most importantly, you need a better backup system to ensure we won't lose any of this valuable resource.

Jeff: I want the related threads to be in a drop down box. For that matter, I'd like the thread posting summary in a drop down as well.

Everyone: She ain't what she used to be. We'll never get it back. This site should be about our eclectic interest in old-time traditional music from all over the world. Our local communities don't have a lot to offer us as far as merchandise and community, so we go to the Mudcat. We should welcome the newbies. We should covet the information we have now and strive to collect more. We should use this place to meet each other, organize and/or promote events. Please, don't forget the good of such a place.

To those of you who aren't around so much anymore: Give us another shot, please.

28 Oct 19 - 10:48 PM (#4015937)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Thanks, Rap.

29 Oct 19 - 09:57 AM (#4015994)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Speaking of morals

Subject: RE: BS: Boring threads are comforting
From: Donuel - PM
Date: 29 Oct 19 - 08:40 AM

Snug as a bug in Hotel Doral
Trump snubs the world while he loses morale
Sooner or later he is going to hell
When all of the bug bites begin to swell

They swell and itch from his head to his toes
The bites grew together from his throat to his nose
All his insults now sound like they're snot
He thought he was great but now he's not

One of the bug bites became highly infected
His yes men were there but no longer protected
All the King's men and all the King's horses
Would not protect him, not even armed forces

The moral of the story is not that its gory
Its the tiniest germ that can bring down a boring
Meglomaniac self interested whore King.
We may be but germs but WE write our story

29 Oct 19 - 12:52 PM (#4016030)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It is currently 14F with a windchill of -9F. Snow covers the ground, an alabaster blanket. There are tracks in snow -- of crosscountry skiers, a lone snowshoer, coyotes, and the pack of wolves that lives on the golf course. I have called and called, hoping Gluon would answer and change this weather, but in vain. As Johnny "Lunger" Keats wrote, "The owl for all his feather [is] a-cold." I am reminded, looking out the bay window, of Ralph W. Emerson's "The Snowstorm"

Announced by all the trumpets of the sky,
Arrives the snow, and, driving o’er the fields,
Seems nowhere to alight: the whited air
Hides hills and woods, the river and the heaven,
And veils the farm-house at the garden’s end.
The sled and traveller stopped, the courier’s feet
Delayed, all friends shut out, the housemates sit
Around the radiant fireplace, enclosed
In a tumultuous privacy of Storm.

Or, tho' 'tis but October (tho' near November) John "Leafy" Whittier's poem "Snowbound" (which I shan't bore you with beyond the first stanza as it seems to go on forever):

The sun that brief December day
Rose cheerless over hills of gray,
And, darkly circled, gave at noon
A sadder light than waning moon.
Slow tracing down the thickening sky
Its mute and ominous prophecy,
A portent seeming less than threat,
It sank from sight before it set.
A chill no coat, however stout,
Of homespun stuff could quite shut out,
A hard, dull bitterness of cold,
That checked, mid-vein, the circling race
Of life-blood in the sharpened face,
The coming of the snow-storm told.
The wind blew east; we heard the roar
Of Ocean on his wintry shore,
And felt the strong pulse throbbing there
Beat with low rhythm our inland air.

Come, brave Gluon! Hurry and take these four-letter words from hence!

29 Oct 19 - 01:47 PM (#4016043)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thanks rap, your misery makes me feel much better now.

Oh how the mighty have fallen
from Khan to Hitler and Stalin
when all of the goyem
return to praise poyum
Maybe we'll stop all the brawlin.

29 Oct 19 - 02:32 PM (#4016050)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mom has rules like Geneva?
I did not know Mom was even arena
bull shitting fools
don't follow the rules like
When its too hot in the kitchen
to stop all of the bitchin
go to the bathroom and sit.

29 Oct 19 - 11:02 PM (#4016109)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That was odd. But the system, one germ at a time, will take down the Orange one. :-)

Over the last couple of weeks I've chatted online and via email with Gnu. He has quite a story to tell, but it's his, not mine, so maybe he'll drop in one day and share some of it. It has been like pulling teeth to understand the timeline, but it makes sense now. He's sounding better all of the time.

New freezer arriving tomorrow morning. I wish there wasn't so much thawed carnage to go with it (though the carne is all rescued and stuffed into the side-by-side of the regular fridge.)

30 Oct 19 - 09:36 AM (#4016170)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Well if you move to Pocotello you won't need a freezer.
I need to revamp the freezer. I suspect there is some ancient lobster at the bottom

30 Oct 19 - 04:10 PM (#4016218)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I bought a dozen eggs yesterday and put them in the refrigerator. When I went to make breakfast this morning, the fridge was full of the souls of dead people!

The eggs were mediums.

30 Oct 19 - 05:56 PM (#4016233)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

They were probably very easy to capture, what with having shell shock.

30 Oct 19 - 09:59 PM (#4016248)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Great yolk!

31 Oct 19 - 08:13 PM (#4016495)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mom said God lets small egg omlettes of far left Nam Vets taste like raw fish scottish cornish danish with a little dab of do-yah.

- Ah Oh, my auto-rhymerizer app has an AI glitch.-

31 Oct 19 - 08:37 PM (#4016500)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Nuc nam on winter kimchi with rice.

Good luck.

01 Nov 19 - 08:53 PM (#4016736)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Is it true that Chicago got so much snow
that they were canceling plane flights yesterday?

01 Nov 19 - 10:05 PM (#4016751)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Chicago got about 4 inches. They could, probably, handle that. Of course, flights IN might have been cancelled.

03 Nov 19 - 01:13 PM (#4017023)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Up outa the gutter! Shame on you!

04 Nov 19 - 08:32 PM (#4017248)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A traveler was headed down a lonely road when it began to rain. Luckily he happened upon a monastery just off the side of the road. He knocked on the door and was greeted by one of the monks. He asked if he could stay the night, to which the monk replied that their order would gladly shelter him, as long as he stayed out of the tower with no doors. As he settled down for the night he suddenly heard an ungodly noise coming from the tower the monk mentioned, a cross between screaming and the wind on aluminum foil. Then suddenly it stopped and he soon fell asleep. He awoke refreshed and asked one of the monks about the sound, but the monk replied that only monks of their monastery may know what is in the tower. He thanked the monks for their hospitality and went on his way. About a year later he returned to the monastery and asked about becoming a monk. The head monk replied that if he would aid the monastery in small ways they would consider him. So for the next five years he helped tend the gardens, clean the windows, and learn of the monks' religion. He even once helped them recover a holy relic to be housed in the monastery. Eventually the head monk told the traveler he was ready to become a monk and initiated him. The monks recited a prayer for such an occasion and provided him with a robe of their brotherhood, and the head monk said it was time to see what was in the tower. The head monk led the new initiate down into the catacombs, deeper and deeper until the head monk found and pressed a loose brick. This opened a secret passage leading to a spiral stair. Up, up they went. Their legs grew tired until the head monk opened a trap door leading to a room surrounded with ivy covered trellises. They were inside the tower now. The head monk opened a door leading to another spiral staircase leading to the room at the very top of the tower. The head monk pulled out a key and unlocked the wooden door, pulling it aside to reveal a rusty iron door. The door clattered as the head monk pulled it open, and behind it was a titanium door. The head monk pressed a six digit PIN on a panel on the door and it slid open. The room was at first too dark to see anything. The head monk flipped a switch and a dim light bulb flickered on. Finally the traveler saw with his own eyes the source of that mysterious sound which he had spent all those years laboring to discover.

04 Nov 19 - 11:40 PM (#4017254)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

https://www.livescience.com/universe-may-be-curved.html

Flat like a bedsheet? Is that the best they could do? My bedsheets aren't particularly flat even when the bed is made. They curve around the mattress, so they could actually be shaped like the universe.

05 Nov 19 - 11:44 AM (#4017289)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Amos would have liked that one, or posted it himself (going back to the original study, of course).

05 Nov 19 - 06:35 PM (#4017374)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Universe IS a bedsheet. Probably on a toddler's bed, and there have been...um...accidents from time to time.

07 Nov 19 - 07:18 PM (#4017766)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh, come on, Folks!!!

07 Nov 19 - 07:28 PM (#4017769)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Ease up, Rapparee.
The forecast has scared the wits out of people over here.
It's pouring down rain after dark
(and with the time change it's darker at an earlier hour),
and
this line of cold air
is supposed to turn the rain into sn*w BEFORE dawn ...
and tomorrow is a working day ...

no wonder if people would rather pull the covers over their heads
than add another post to the Annex thread.

Hope Gnu arrived home as planned today.
And hope the weather is not cruel to him up there, as well ...

08 Nov 19 - 01:52 PM (#4017983)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I got an email from him just now. He’s home.

08 Nov 19 - 07:03 PM (#4018035)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Rap, run over and give him a hand, he has a long list of things to do around the house.

10 Nov 19 - 09:10 PM (#4018414)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

G stands for Gnu, whose weapon of defence
Are long, sharp, curling horns, and common sense.
To these he adds a name so short and strong,
That even hardy Boers pronounce it wrong.
How often on a bright autumnal day
The pious people of Pretoria say,
'Come, let us hunt the______' Then no more is heard
but sounds of strong men struggling with a word;
Meanwhile the distant Gnu with grateful eyes
Observes his opportunity and flies.

--Hilaire Belloc

12 Nov 19 - 12:09 PM (#4018698)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Lookout, Moncton! Gnu is out and about. No "flies" but walking, rolling, and modest amount of driving. Flying will have to wait a couple of weeks.

12 Nov 19 - 07:55 PM (#4018773)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Okay, dammit, what was the source of that mysterious sound which the traveler/monk had spent all those years laboring to discover?

12 Nov 19 - 10:37 PM (#4018775)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's cold now, but MOM found a silicone thing to put over the tub drain so she can run the hot water 3 or 4 inches deeper than the tub would normally allow, so she's happy. Comes out of the tub half-cooked.

Dunno about a noise. Ask Gnu.

13 Nov 19 - 03:35 PM (#4018960)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Stilly, thanks for telling us,
and I for one
am sincerely relieved to hear that
Gnu can walk as well as roll ...
I was so anxious that he might be unable to walk at all.

14 Nov 19 - 06:44 AM (#4019047)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are no impeahment parties here but bars are celebrating with supeona colladas, squid bro pros and Slim peach mints.

15 Nov 19 - 04:47 PM (#4019433)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There's a stray male pitbull wandering around the front and down by the creek. The pack discussed his presence with him through the mesh security door; he didn't like the language they used and headed off. Zeke in the back was simply asking him to come an play, but the girls were offended that he was in the yard without a proper introduction. MOM was sitting on the swing in the sun in the back yard watching them all and sipping an early Friday evening cocktail.

18 Nov 19 - 11:11 AM (#4020057)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I aimed at opening MOM's annex but accidentally opened the "what are we eating" thread instead. MOM has looked at that thread and noted more than a couple of the recipes, but when I look at the recycle bin (she does use it) I see a lot of take-out containers. I can tell that somewhere in the kitchen the bag of potatoes has turned bad. Now which cupboard were they stashed in?

18 Nov 19 - 11:46 AM (#4020068)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's a thread currently on the board called "BS: What colour IS that?" It's about a paint color called "Clontarf". The color is named for the Clontarf suburb of Dublin, whose name is derived from the Irish Cluain Tarbh", meaning "meadow of the bull".

I only mention this because eaveryone knows that, as far as the Mudcat goes, the MOAB is the REAL meadow of the bull. Perhaps Mom should keep an eye out for possible leakage from that thread into this one.

18 Nov 19 - 06:08 PM (#4020191)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, even though I’m in Springfield, Illinois I’m still alive, albeit barely.

19 Nov 19 - 02:37 PM (#4020400)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's too late - MOAB has leaked all over the place and people have attempted a couple of anti_MOAB threads that died a brutal death.

21 Nov 19 - 12:40 PM (#4020646)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Thanksgiving (US) is approaching and MOM is settling on the menu. I think she's going to ask everyone to bring major parts of the meal. Ever since Little Hawk and his friends made a "deep-fried turkey" that was launched into low Earth orbit, she prefers someone bake the bird. Any volunteers?

21 Nov 19 - 01:05 PM (#4020653)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

MOAB is not just leaking it is bleeding. It is either Recipes, what we are eating, an obit, or a Mudcat recovery ward...

By removing it for what ever guarded reason was its death and a loss of its legacy.

21 Nov 19 - 09:57 PM (#4020742)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom will never die.

22 Nov 19 - 11:20 AM (#4020814)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I will give up on Mom when they pry her bloated gin-soaked carcass from my cold dead hands.

23 Nov 19 - 02:22 PM (#4020940)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

See, even BWL will give up and Rap says she "will never die" but this is from a guy who just said he is barely alive. Has MOM ever been in such jeopardy before? She is need of medication, perhaps in the form of expert original poetry, or sublime BS or both.

However yesteryear's near Earth orbiting deepfried turkey is rather sublime.

24 Nov 19 - 12:36 AM (#4020976)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Signs of life! MOM, we know you're there!

I was searching for a thread on Tom Lehrer and came up with lyrics and threads in the results. A post of mine from MOAB was there and I clicked on it. And can see it! So I then looked at the date of that post and went to the "view posts by date" option in the drop down menu and saw that Little Hawk had also posted that day. If you just mouse over the link without clicking it you can see the entire thing in the bottom. I saw the post number and typed that over the message number in the result I was already looking at and could see the LH post also. SO _ we can see in through the keyhole, but that's about it so far. The whole thing can't load but it is viewable one post at a time.

26 Nov 19 - 12:04 AM (#4021103)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Tonight's repeat of NOVA was about "The Violence Paradox" and they're talking about "self-domestication" to reduce the amount of violence in modern societies.

Where does this leave Shane and Blind Drunk, et. al? Is there violence there or simply sloth?

26 Nov 19 - 05:01 PM (#4021248)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Will it go round in circles

I've got a song, It ain't got no melody
I'ma gonna sing it to my friends
I've got a song, It ain't got no melody
I'ma gonna sing it to my friends

Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?
Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?

I've got a story, ain't got no moral
Let the bad guy win every once in a while
I've got a story, ain't got no moral
Let the bad guy win every once in a while

Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?
Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?

I've got a dance, I ain't got no steps, no
I'm gonna let the music move me around
I've got a dance, I ain't got no steps
I'm gonna let the music move me around

Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?
Will it go round in circles?
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?

Well Woo...

30 Nov 19 - 11:42 AM (#4021719)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I have returned. I had to ride a bus full of returning college students from Salt Lake City to Pocatello during a blizzard yesterday to get here, five times I had to get out and push the bus out of a snow drift in temperatures below 0°K, but we made it. Now I sit staring out over a frozen landscape, no movement, and a lead-gray sky. But I am HOME.

30 Nov 19 - 12:29 PM (#4021728)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Sounds like an adventure! Can you go sledding on the golf course, are the slopes that are steep enough?

30 Nov 19 - 12:38 PM (#4021730)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Severn

I hope that we can fully revive Mom before the Summer sets, and we can all shout, "Waugh who?"

English lit or English sober, she must be preserved, at least until there are more posts about her than there are Country and Bluegrass about her.

Has anybody ever considered a thread called "The Idiot Bastard Son of All BS Threads, just in case?.......

30 Nov 19 - 03:06 PM (#4021740)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That is the Little Hawk/Shane subtext that runs through much of MOAB.

30 Nov 19 - 07:19 PM (#4021762)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's already a thread called "The Bastard Child of all BS Threads".

Whether the bastard child in question is an idiot or not is an open question.

30 Nov 19 - 11:07 PM (#4021770)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The so-called "Shame [correct spelling and meaning] McBride" is based on an actual character that LH knew well when he was imin Blind River, Ontario (yes, it exists). At the time LH was researching the music of bums, tramps, hoboes, panhandlers, and sex workers for his PhD dissertation at Juilliard¹.

Yes, he received a PhD from the Fred Juilliard School of Clog Dancing. Call him "Doc Hawk" to let him know you know.

¹Hawk, Little. "A Dissertation On the Music of Bums, Tramps, Hoboes, Panhandlers, and Sex Workers In Blind River, Ontario, Canada, Submitted In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of Doctor of Philosophy at the Fred Juilliard School of Clog Dancing, June 13, 1932."

01 Dec 19 - 11:38 AM (#4021821)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Congratulations to the engravers at the US Mint!

They have succeeded in making Harriet Tubman look precisely as constipated as all the other presidents and notables whose portraits adorn US currency!

01 Dec 19 - 11:55 AM (#4021823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think the engraver did an excellent job, considering the engraving projects I'm hearing about on AM radio as I listen to my weekly gardening program. There's apparently a presidential gold coin for the current occupant of the White House. Speculating about that OTHER project is liable to cause all sorts of indigestion or other GI upsets.

01 Dec 19 - 08:27 PM (#4021880)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I don't think the US Mints create coins honoring living Presidents.

"(b) United States currency has the inscription “In God We Trust” in a place the Secretary decides is appropriate. Only the portrait of a deceased individual may appear on United States currency and securities. The name of the individual shall be inscribed below the portrait." 31 U.S. Code §?5114(b).

LBJ signed an Executive Order for Kennedy half dollar, otherwise the standard is at least 10 years dead. Another exception was granted for some of those on the Presidential Dollars series.

02 Dec 19 - 08:16 PM (#4021996)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Me and sometimes Stilly, doing all the heavy lifting around here.

02 Dec 19 - 08:26 PM (#4022000)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

... well, maybe we will hear from Gnu before New Year's?
One can but hope.

03 Dec 19 - 11:52 AM (#4022059)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That would make it Gnu Year's, don't you think?

The "mint" producing the Trump coins is the same private enterprise that has been advertising on AM radio and UHF channels late at night on weekends for decades. Not THE US Mint.

03 Dec 19 - 01:56 PM (#4022085)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

And it's just a short step from
Gnu Year's to
the
Year of the Gnu.

04 Dec 19 - 12:22 AM (#4022169)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

where did everybody go ?

04 Dec 19 - 06:27 AM (#4022196)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What do you expect with the actual thread gone and a policy of allowing only a scant few/membership to post in BS.

04 Dec 19 - 07:35 AM (#4022204)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Hah! It's the Annual Holi/ydays and everyone is out shopping for presents to give me!

04 Dec 19 - 11:53 AM (#4022232)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There are ways to slip in posts from the outside, but you have to know who to ask. . . just ask that Overlord fellow.

04 Dec 19 - 12:00 PM (#4022238)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What would you like Rap? Do you like whale tusks or teeth?

05 Dec 19 - 07:23 PM (#4022369)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'd like some scrimshaw from the whaling ship "Essex" -- 19th century stuff, you know.

05 Dec 19 - 08:00 PM (#4022375)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I have a whale tooth scrimshaw but I don't remember the ship. When I run accross it in the futility room, it's yours.

05 Dec 19 - 09:39 PM (#4022389)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Nice! And I have a futility room also; lately the puppy keeps dragging the rug from in front of my washer out into the yard and dragging it through the lawn and leaves. It seems futile to try to keep the whole house out of this dog's reach.

06 Dec 19 - 08:00 AM (#4022440)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Goodness, just keep it in a cage/crate. The house, not the dog. Keeping the dog in such is impossible.

06 Dec 19 - 08:18 AM (#4022443)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I was told the tooth is too heavy so it may be a forgery/fugazy to trick interior decorators.

06 Dec 19 - 09:12 AM (#4022449)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

At 'Norwall tusks R us' you can get a Norwall tusk to defend yourself against mad stabers.

06 Dec 19 - 09:26 AM (#4022450)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Stilly the way we tried to measure the curve or flatness of the universe was to trace humongous triangles and see if they added up to more degrees than a flat triangle. Why they got it wrong is that the
universe is bigger than we thought.

This question was asked of me in 1970 and I chose an open universe ie curved. Good catch, You found that link before I did.

06 Dec 19 - 10:04 PM (#4022565)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I use a protractor, a piece of string, a fishing weight, and a level to measure the curvature of the Universe. It's quite simple when you know how. Oh, yes! I do my calculations on a 10" K&E log log decitrig slide rule (I used to use an abacus but I wanted more accuracy).

07 Dec 19 - 10:52 AM (#4022620)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ah...I always wondered what instruments were used by the Mayans to measure the precession of the Earth in increments of 42,000 years.

I heard there is an impossibly large black hole nearby that is capturing smaller ones even closer to us.

Biden says, "if we can snag one, we will easily be able to broadcast ourselves into the future, no bones about it.
This is no Malarchy by cracky. We will first send whippersnappers for the long voyage with all the modern do hickies of home like a phonograph, ice box and ringer washers. 23 Skidoo!"

07 Dec 19 - 10:30 PM (#4022726)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I taught the Mayans. Also the Egyptians, Mesopotamians, Indians, Chinese, Atlantans, Greeks, Muans, and all the rest.

08 Dec 19 - 02:04 PM (#4022869)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I started a pithy short remark about food porn on TV on the weekends, but seem to have accidentally closed that browser before sending. Darn.

08 Dec 19 - 03:03 PM (#4022876)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I would believe you out read them all but I'm too savvy to believe you taught them. Ancient Alien Astronaut genetic engineers say "we did".

I am on my slide down from my cerebral maximum having had my migraine and visual trickery yesterday. See you guys on the other side of consciousness.

08 Dec 19 - 09:18 PM (#4022932)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Of course, in the beginning there was Nothing. Just a big, black Nothing. I had to invent the concept of "points" or there would have continued to be nothing to measure. If there was nothing to measure I couldn't teach all them folks how to measure. You may or may not thank me for this later.

09 Dec 19 - 08:19 AM (#4022984)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You have gone from emporer to God? Julius found this a difficult transition. Of course it is an honor to have God post here. Its better than being friended on Facebook.

10 Dec 19 - 07:55 AM (#4023076)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You may address me as "Dominus et Deus meus." And I declare double tithing for all!

11 Dec 19 - 10:39 AM (#4023143)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Please, make that a lowercase god - the panoply of gods created here at Mudcat all deserve to be lowercase. The uppercase one (created in the shape of man) is busy with war and pestilence right now. Best not call that malignant being over here.

11 Dec 19 - 08:17 PM (#4023240)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Capitalization by demigods moves in strange and mysterious ways unlike mudelf rules.

Like, pope Fransisco the San Andreas treat.

11 Dec 19 - 08:39 PM (#4023246)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Genisis
From: Donuel

Once upon a midnight dreary
As I searched, both weak and weary,
For lyrics to song that was labeled "forgotten lore"
Then did I hear a pecking, pecking, pecking, pecking,

Some peckerheads, I thought, were pecking at my chamber door.

But no, I had searched for lyrics,
Using all the computer searching tricks
I had mastered many, many years before,
And I had stumbled into a den of old and eldritch scat
And there I posted, as a GUEST, my first post at Cafe Mudcat

11 Dec 19 - 08:55 PM (#4023247)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

How high's the BS, mama?
Two feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Two feet high and risin'

They're a carryin' on about Schroedinger's cat
And why that is this and this is that
Everyone's a talkin' right outta his hat,
Two feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Three feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Three feet high and risin'

It's comin' up from the ground an' down from the trees
It's comin' in ships across the seven seas
I'm pretty darn tall but it's up to my knees,
Three feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Four feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Four feet high and risin'

It's a comin' from the sky just like it was rain,
It's outta control like a runaway train,
This whole bunch is loony, ain't none of 'em sane
Four feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Five feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Five feet high and risin'

Better get some hip-waders or a tall pair of boots
Its a risin' quicker than you can say "shoot"
An' these people is crazy as a whole buncha coots,
Five feet high and risin'

Well, it's five feet high and risin'

guess who wrote these last two.

12 Dec 19 - 10:17 PM (#4023451)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Those were BWL and Rapaire

now back to our regularly scheduled incomplete reality of quantum physics.

The world is composed of quantum realities, so are our brains with 'micro tubuels'. Einstein did elucidate the realities of the quantum universe, his only attack he made upon quantum theory was that it is incomplete. So let us complete it, shall we?

Lets look at a thought experiment in which an adjoining medium or 'space dimension' would allow for all the odd inexplicable behaviors of quantum wavicles. It would have to be a medium or space dimension that would allow for wavicles to disappear between states and account for entanglement.

It would have to allow for the very small to enter and exit this special space but block the macroverse. The properties of this special space or medium would have to allow a simulataneous touching of every spot in the universe to touch or be adjacent to one another.

It would have to be a very special and bizarre space indeed. I have always called it anti space and of course it would have to be, get this, invisible.

Such a space would allow for all the impossibilities of quantum mechanics. Sherlock said when you've tried everything and only one possibility remains, that has to be your answer. Well that defies logic but if the special space allows for all quantum shenanygans...it should be considered. The problem is we can not yet measure let alone see special quantum space.

There we completed the quantum mystery. thank you.

13 Dec 19 - 01:00 AM (#4023456)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You can't top the New York Post for Bullshit. But in this instance they actually published something more bizarre than bullshit.

In case the link expires, the article says:

It’s a bird … it’s a plane … it’s a penis fish?

Thousands of “pulsing penis fish” have washed ashore on a California beach, as seen in jarring photos that are raising eyebrows due to the creature’s phallic shape.

The quirky marine life is officially called fat innkeeper worms (Urechis caupo), and an expert writes for Bay Nature that he believes a recent storm in the Drakes Beach area is the reason so many of them mysteriously appeared on the beach.

Ivan Parr, a biologist from the Western Section of the Wildlife Society, spotted them Dec. 6 and explains that the 10-inch fat innkeeper worm typically lives underwater, burrowing in mud or sand, but the storm likely carried them ashore.

“I’ve heard my share of imaginative theories from beachcombers, such as flotsam of a wrecked bratwurst freighter,” he writes.

However, Parr explains that a sausage ship accident is not the cause of this scene.

“We’re seeing the risk of building your home out of sand,” he says. “Strong storms — especially during El Niño years — are perfectly capable of laying siege to the intertidal zone, breaking apart the sediments, and leaving their contents stranded on shore.”

The spoonworm, which can live up to 25 years, feeds and swims using its “spatula-shaped proboscis.” It typically eats bacteria, plankton and other small particles, which it collects using “sticky mucus nets.”

Parr says he’s heard of sightings over the years in California at Pajaro Dunes, Moss Landing, Bodega Bay and Princeton Harbor.

The creature dates back 300 million years and also can be eaten. An anonymous colleague at The Post who has dined on a stir-fried fat innkeeper worm in Shanghai, China, describes the taste as “like a Livestrong band mated with a clam.”

13 Dec 19 - 08:30 AM (#4023513)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

We don't have penis worms in Florida, but we do have Slippery Dicks.

13 Dec 19 - 08:50 AM (#4023515)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Fortunately we have neither in Idaho! They wouldn't dare! Our State Legislature would quickly put a stop to it, if it didn't find a way to tax it.

By the way, our appeal of our property tax has gone to the State tax board. According to the letter we received yesterday this county has filed 279 such appeals, versus 325 for the rest of the STATE. The Board is also out of money for the appeals and will be asking the Legislature to an additional appropriation.

13 Dec 19 - 10:29 AM (#4023531)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Edited my last post to capture the text. This way if/when the post goes away one can still read the text and search for photos of those lingam worms.

It's difficult for this thread to continue to generate high quality BS when the news of BS coming out of the UK suggests that much of that kingdom has gone berserk and re-elected their own clown head-of-state. Here's hoping cooler heads prevail here after Drumpf makes history (achieved while this post was being typed). But this is supposed to be an amusing, uplifting thread, not a really really scary story, so I will desist from further observation of this sort.

14 Dec 19 - 12:19 PM (#4023733)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The MOAB Constitution sub section 272 Eyes Only addendum file FOIA 12268003FY states clearly :

(redacted) for all purposes to shield and protect (redacted) in order to promote unlimited comic (redacted) or SHOW OFF (redacted)...

So much for your version of what MOABS is supposed to be.
I'm sure the Bitches of the 7 stars and Lion's club agree ;^/

15 Dec 19 - 10:14 AM (#4023864)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I have horrible news! The Dollar Tree store no longer carries Mrs. Freshley's "Delicious Deals" mini-donuts! I suppose the wholesale price has gone up to where Dollar Tree can no longer sell them for a dollar. (They're $1.50 elsewhere.)

I suppose that's what happens when one's business model is "Everything's a Dollar". Even at very moderate inflation rates, there will eventually come a time when almost everything is more than a dollar. What will happen to Dollar Tree when that day arrives? Will they rebrand themselves "Dollar-and-a-Half Tree" where "Everything's a Buck-Fifty"?

15 Dec 19 - 10:54 AM (#4023871)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Lots of Dollar stores have closed and are replaced by '5 Below'
Everything under 5 dollars

15 Dec 19 - 04:05 PM (#4023941)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I tried to buy something at a dollar store. The sign said "Everything $1.00!!" They wouldn't sell me the store, the cashier, the computer system or ANYTHING! Big ripoff! I went next door and told a guy that I wanted to buy a brand new car for a dollar and told him the store next door said EVERYTHING was $1.00 and so why didn't he honor that?

Finally the cops and EMTs came and took me to the hospital in an ambulance with nicely padded walls.

15 Dec 19 - 05:48 PM (#4023959)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Dollar General and Family Dollar have retained their names but they gave up on charging $1 for everything ages ago. There was another sort of dollar store, usually a real hodge-podge of stuff, a lot of it imported, and the owners were usually immigrants. Those places had some real treasures at times. I think the ones I used to shop at have all closed (probably because I'm not the only one who abandoned them for Big Lots years ago.)

15 Dec 19 - 08:49 PM (#4023983)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I have it! Dollar Tree just needs to change their slogan from "Where Everything's a Dollar" to ""Where Everything Would Be a Dollar If Trump Hadn't Slapped Tariffs on All the Chinese Crap We Sell".

16 Dec 19 - 07:47 PM (#4024173)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Just like family Storage lockers, large warhouses loose a lease or goes bankrupt. If you have capitol you can operate a dollar bush chain on the internet and sell on the business model of building 19 without real estate costs..

A clever buyer of distresed or abandoned merchandise can sustain a warehouse, shipping dept and internet workers almost like Amazon. Acquire crap at a maximum of 5 cents on the dollar and sell at 25. Expand to China for other abandoned crap when the time is right.

Call it 'INSANE JANE' AND SELL AT UNBELIEVABLE PRICES.

Finding the unlikely cheap large warehouse is key
know any?

17 Dec 19 - 12:35 AM (#4024188)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You can pay a fee to Amazon to keep that stuff in their warehouse, then the "Fullfilled by Amazon" line appears in your sales through Amazon as a vendor. Done and dusted.

17 Dec 19 - 11:07 AM (#4024206)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Large warehouses lik the RNC, Redskin stadium,Trump hotels, Trump Mega church...

This just in...

A transplant drug with anti-ageing properties has been shown to rejuvenate the oral health of old mice.
The drug, called RAPAMYCIN,
regenerated the bone in which teeth are embedded, restored the mouth microbiome to a youthful state and reduced inflammation.

It is the first time any treatment has been shown to rejuvenate oral health, says team leader Matt Kaeberlein at the University of Washington in Seattle. “We could actually see spots where new bone was growing around the teeth.”

Read more: https://www.newscientist.com/article/2227421-anti-ageing-drug-rejuvenates-the-mouths-and-oral-microbiome-of-mice/#ixzz68MTA7Rec

17 Dec 19 - 12:54 PM (#4024231)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

correction; RAPARMYCIN

17 Dec 19 - 02:22 PM (#4024253)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

While the yard next door is plowed with footprints in the snow, I haven't seen the four neighbors so far this week.

18 Dec 19 - 09:24 PM (#4024496)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM! I just remembered that my automobile license plate begins 1BS in honor of you!!

18 Dec 19 - 10:51 PM (#4024503)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

My current license plate ends in RIC, in honor of Ricky Ricardo. As long as I have that particular plate, I am obligated to shout "Honey, I'm home!" every time I walk through the front door.

19 Dec 19 - 08:30 PM (#4024705)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, the 1B indicates the county (Bannock, the only county named for a bread product), but there's enough S here to share.

22 Dec 19 - 08:05 AM (#4024858)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh, this place is certainly a thrill every minute! Horrible Hank and Stormy Sam had their annual Christmas shoot-out at the Legion Hovel last night, complete with the Annual Pitch 'Em Out contest by the devotees of the place. HH flew the farthest (87.4 meters, metres in Canada, with SS in second place at only 67.0 meters). Naturally, their SuperSoakers were confiscated, and SS was found to also be carrying a hidden Nerf derringer! And as usual they had to buy a round for everyone in the Hovel at the time.

23 Dec 19 - 08:03 AM (#4024963)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

There are currently 19 threads in the "music" section upstairs and 26 threads in the BS section! There's more BS than music for the first time in recent memory! And some people had the nerve to say BS was dead!

Okay, half of those BS threads are the Brits going on incessantly about their political horseshit, but I suppose they count anyway. Sometimes you just have to take what you can get.

23 Dec 19 - 08:17 AM (#4024967)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Limeys calling each other names. Tsk, tsk. We would never ever do that in the US!

Granted, I do think it would be interesting if dueling (swords only) were re-instituted and folks had to put up or shut up. Knowing you might be called upon to put your life on the line to back up your cockamamie insults/opinions might make you think again before calling someone (excuse the language!) a "dumb poopyhead".

23 Dec 19 - 09:26 AM (#4024973)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's 7:25 a.m. and there is NO SIGN OF SUNRISE!!!

The Galactic Overlord has stopped the sun from coming up! We're all gonna freeze and stuff!!

23 Dec 19 - 10:09 AM (#4024979)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The fog is so dense here you can't see a full block ahead of you, so what do you expect? The Galactic Overlord slept in this morning, apparently. (And I thinned out the Limeys yesterday, there was way too much bickering going on in that cross-thread running battle.)

26 Dec 19 - 03:31 PM (#4024995)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

Forrest Gump lied!

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates!

Life is like a claw machine in the vending area at the entrance to a Walmart. Most of the time, you just feed quarters to it and get nothing back. Every once in a while, you get a tiny stuffed penguin.

NOBODY ever gets the drone.

26 Dec 19 - 08:23 PM (#4025029)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I made a slight error. The sun did come up, and also yesterday and today. I shall predict that it shall come up tomorrow. I may write a song about it called "Tomorrow."

How's this sound?

The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow
There'll be sun!

I probably need some more verses. Amos would write it in jig time, but since I can't dance a jig (or much of anything else these days) I'll write it in plain ol' 9/16 or something.

26 Dec 19 - 08:25 PM (#4025030)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Happy Gnu Year's is on the way.

And I noticed something curious.
The big Mother of All BS Threads is still closed for repairs;
that page still comes up.
What's curious is that I can use the Filter Search thread title feature,
enter Mother of all BS Threads,
and the Great Old Thread still appears in the search results.
That's how I got the 'closed for repairs' page.

27 Dec 19 - 09:21 PM (#4025148)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom is eternal.

Now that Betelgeuse looks like it's going to go nova or even supernova it makes me wonder if it's the work of the Galactic You-Know-Who. (Is there a Galactic Overlady? Or do women just naturally rule the Overlords?)

27 Dec 19 - 11:27 PM (#4025155)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The real reason Betelgeuse is going to blow up is because the Galactic Overlord has never liked the star's name. A zillion times bigger than our Sun and the best name we humans can come up with is Betelgeuse? It's hard to spell and sounds like a joke. And what does it even mean?

The GO has decided to get rid of Betelgeuse and replace it with something else, in hopes we'll give the new thing a more dignified name.

Like Bryce or Heather.

28 Dec 19 - 08:40 AM (#4025197)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Call it Biff or Scooter, Beatle Juice is real in its current male personna and soon will enter its female state of a black hole.

28 Dec 19 - 09:36 AM (#4025202)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I find it curious that Tomorrow is unreachable in the now. It is untouchable and forever out of realization except in the cosmologist's POV thought experiment, "the slice of Time model".
Only there is there a place and time where tommorrow has already happened.

If the Son will 'come out' tommorrow, is a personal matter.

Thats the truth

28 Dec 19 - 09:45 AM (#4025203)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I suppose that the inhabitants around Betelgeuse (there are FOUR E's in that name!) could simply be reducing their energy usage and the GO isn't involved at all. Of course, he does own the power utilities out that way and lack of income could annoy him.

28 Dec 19 - 10:29 AM (#4025211)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

If a planet's orbit is tidally locked with its star so that the same planetary surface always faces the star, there are no days. There's just the same shit all the time. Boring!

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?

The sun won't come out tomorrow
'Cause the damned thing's always in the sky
We can't think about tomorrow
It's not part of our ree-al-i-tie

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?

28 Dec 19 - 10:30 AM (#4025212)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

In "Preview", they were musical notes, not question marks. Honest.

29 Dec 19 - 07:39 AM (#4025325)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL, it is said there are 3 TRUTHS we deal with in our universe; personal truth, political truth and objective truth.

Personally if Betelguse blew up today we will never see it in our lifetime as its light and gravity waves make their journey of 430 light years to Earth.

Politically the 'make Betelgeuse great again' movement has been good for their antisemetism attacks, mass shootings, nazis, zenophobic internment camps for immigrant children and waves of enourmous hate that is on the verge of exploding.

Objectively Betelgeuse could go on like this for another million years before its mega nova.

29 Dec 19 - 08:18 AM (#4025328)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It may be as far as 650+ light years away depending upon galactic variations, orbits, time and dark energy, but who is counting.
If you were lucky when it exploded in the distant past, you would be able to see it in the daytime sky. Gamma ray damage would be 'light'.

30 Dec 19 - 07:22 AM (#4025444)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

music notes versus question marks,
that sounds familiar.

30 Dec 19 - 08:42 PM (#4025578)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I am off to Missoula and then to Spokane around first light tomorrow. The forecast changed from pleine du neige to plus de plui. If your French or mine is rusty and squeaky, lots of snow was changed to lots of rain (maybe). Anyway, the temperatures changed from low 30s F to 40s F. Since we are going by car I'm taking my laptop and will let y'all know if I'm still alive. Back home Sunday sometime.

Why visit the Spokane Museum of Arts and Culture? Because

The centerpiece of the exhibition is a rare embroidered Bengali quilt which, according to recent research, is most likely one of the oldest surviving quilts in the United States. Its design, materials, and construction indicate that it was made in Bengal during the 17th century. Genealogical research suggests that it was brought to Massachusetts during the 1600s and to Spokane around 1900 by the family of David L. Huntington, for whom Huntington Park is named. This provenance is supported by consultation with outside experts.

My wife has an "in" with the curator of the textiles there.

01 Jan 20 - 04:35 PM (#4025804)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Happy New Year everybody.
And everybody else, as well.

01 Jan 20 - 06:19 PM (#4025827)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Happy New Year That Betelgeuse Is Gonna Explode! (Mom, I've got a nice deep mine shaft, well stocked with whisky, whiskey, and even foodstuffs where you can stay safe.)

02 Jan 20 - 02:39 PM (#4026002)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I've discovered a foolproof way for you and your friends to get away with doing unscrupulous things without getting caught! Just make sure you NEVER refer to the deliberative process leading up to the actual nefarious deed(s) as "hatching a plot". When plots are hatched, the events which ensue are automatically doomed to failure. Just call the planning process "doing the laundry" or something, and everything will go perfectly.

Also, make sure you don't claim afterwards that everything "went off without a hitch". That's a sure-fire way to guarantee that some moron left their wallet at the scene of the crime.

02 Jan 20 - 06:58 PM (#4026032)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The good news today is that I found a file I saved back in 2015, with links to all of the poems posted in MOM¹ that Amos wanted hidden so he could publish them in a book. Or I may have taken them out of the posts, I can't remember. It's possible to open individual posts if the results show up in a search, but I can't paste the link directly into the search bar and get anything but code "500 Internal Server Error." I have to figure out if I can search on the message number.

The bummer today is that I was at the grocery store self-checkout with stuff from my shopping list and I accidentally left my milk carton behind (I didn't scan it so I didn't pay for it, it's down on that little shelf beside the register). Now what else did I set on that shelf? And I seem to have lost that shopping list.

02 Jan 20 - 07:35 PM (#4026035)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Most of the poems that were hidden (several dozen) in the Mudcat Poetry Corner thread have been restored. I think Amos' plans to publish that poetry were cut short by life and the move, and then his death. There are a few more to track down at some point in the future, but this is the lion's share, as far as I can tell.

02 Jan 20 - 10:48 PM (#4026049)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Amos' poems are in a secret Mudcat place called "Access Denied."

We leave Spokane and go to Butte on Saturday. On Sunday we go home. (What does it mean in Montana if you get something that only says "3-7-77" like the note I got does?)

02 Jan 20 - 11:49 PM (#4026054)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Oops. Link fixed. No idea about your note. Maybe you haven't washed that jacket in a really really really long time and that note was in the pocket?

03 Jan 20 - 06:07 AM (#4026080)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The "3-7-77" thing is just a little joke Montanans play to confuse out-of-staters. The entire state of Montana is seeded with similar notes placed in random locations. They're intended to make unsuspecting non-Montanans wonder why the date is important when, in actuality, it's a day on which nothing out of the ordinary happened.

Montanans are easily amused.

03 Jan 20 - 06:31 AM (#4026083)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thats a pretty high falutin quilt. We just volunteer for the Linus project.

03 Jan 20 - 09:13 AM (#4026117)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

poof

03 Jan 20 - 09:42 AM (#4026125)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

3-7-77 bible verse
...So each leader brought the following gifts: a silver bowl that weighed over three pounds and a silver sprinkling bowl weighing almost two pounds, both of them filled with flour and olive oil as grain sacrifices and weighed according to the official standards; a small gold dish filled with incense; a young bull, a full-grown ram, and a year-old ram as sacrifices to please the Lord; a goat as a sacrifice for sin; and two bulls, five full-grown rams, five goats, and five rams a year old as sacrifices to ask the Lord’s blessing...

King James Reader's Digest version:

...and two bulls, five rams, five male goats, and five male lambs a year old, for the fellowship sacrifice. This was the offering of Pagiel son of Ochran.

3-7-77 Tom Brady's locker combination

3-7-77 masonic montanans

03 Jan 20 - 10:13 AM (#4026132)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

This is a BS thread still - and that "rare Bengali quilt" in this photo has as much character as a blank bedsheet. Can you actually see any colors, contours, or stitching up close to it? (The rest of the collection is here.)

03 Jan 20 - 01:48 PM (#4026166)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

That link not only has a photo of the rare quilt,
but some descriptive info from
the institution with the exhibition I guess.

This descriptive info includes the words
"floral motifs."

I can't see a single darned flower.

03 Jan 20 - 02:12 PM (#4026170)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Madam, my wife shall post a reply.

03 Jan 20 - 08:06 PM (#4026236)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

embroidary lasts forever but old vegetable color fast dyes - do not.

03 Jan 20 - 09:41 PM (#4026248)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My wife replies: Look here and learn.

Donuel: She refers you here (scroll down), 6,200 year old use of indigo plant dye here, and
pharaonic Egypt here. She states that while the colors may fade over time, so will everyone.

04 Jan 20 - 04:20 PM (#4026328)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Century old quilts by Susan McCord before their time

04 Jan 20 - 10:30 PM (#4026374)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In our house is a quilt from 1780 or so. The blue in the center panel is finely powdered lapis lazuli.

05 Jan 20 - 05:00 PM (#4026417)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Okay, Mom. I’m home now.

05 Jan 20 - 05:20 PM (#4026421)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I'm home too, Mom, but I haven't really been away, so don't act surprised.

05 Jan 20 - 07:54 PM (#4026443)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Big meeting in HI for astronomers. Nice schmear for space crashers.

06 Jan 20 - 07:48 AM (#4026523)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yes, that's the first meeting of the US Space Force's Special Secret Space Section (USSFSSSS). They're meeting under the cover of a scientific group to research surfing on non-water oceans. Their shoulder patch reads "USSFSSSS-SSS" (the part after the "-" is for "Secret Surfing Studies." I'm certain that the Galactic Overlord has his (her?) agents there.

07 Jan 20 - 07:34 AM (#4026730)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

ISTIPORTOHEL
There are fears that SMERSH will try to infiltrate.

08 Jan 20 - 12:30 PM (#4027048)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I can prove the planet is warming; I have to mow my lawn today. It's January in Texas and only in the last couple of years have I had to mow the lawn during the winter months. Gluon and her duck-dog friends haven't been by for a while or they could have grazed it down. At the same time they need to eat the large snails and slugs that are appearing out there. I haven't seen this size in all of the years I've lived here (38 of them so far - OMG who knew I'd ever move to Texas, let alone live here for such a long time).

08 Jan 20 - 12:41 PM (#4027054)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

do you get feral pigs 'way up in North Texas?
There was news broadcast footage of
a parking garage in
Austin, for heaven's sake,
of a feral hog pursued by
a deputy with a LASSO.

08 Jan 20 - 03:22 PM (#4027105)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Yes, there are feral hogs in the Fort Worth area, but only in some neighborhoods. Like Arcadia Pork Estates, Pork Glen, Pork Palisades, and The Porks of Deer Creek.

08 Jan 20 - 05:06 PM (#4027126)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Stilly River sage seasons feral porkers.

08 Jan 20 - 06:09 PM (#4027148)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Hogging all of the pig puns, Rap?

08 Jan 20 - 08:24 PM (#4027182)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'll just trotter on out, and if it's a pun sow be it. If it makes someone bristle, well, that's better than being boaring.

08 Jan 20 - 08:39 PM (#4027189)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I use Tapatio salsa picante hot sauce. I put that shit on everything except dessert and beverages.

Pigs are biologically similar to humans and are frequently used for human medical research and transplants.
Be kind to the 'fair ol' pig

09 Jan 20 - 02:21 AM (#4027218)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I love Tapatio sauce - it's great on all sorts of things. (Ta-pa-tio, emphasis on "tio," not Ta-Patio, for anyone wondering.)

09 Jan 20 - 08:20 AM (#4027253)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We use TryMe's Tiger Sauce. Adds flavor in moderate amounts and heat in larger amounts. I've thought for many years that food should be interesting but not toxic.

09 Jan 20 - 08:38 AM (#4027258)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Since we are organically similar:
Does anyone know if we taste like the other white meat?
What about bacon?

I bet ET's know.

signed, Steve Miller - "put the lotion in the basket".
and don't forget the Tapatio

09 Jan 20 - 01:15 PM (#4027334)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

ET's also believe food should be interesting but not toxic.
Thats why they prefer a protien rich Alaskan homesteader who ate lots of moose liver.
They do take people in National Parks but tourists do not taste as good due to the junk food heavy diet of vacationers

09 Jan 20 - 02:58 PM (#4027365)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

What do you call a feral pig with three eyes?

A feral piiig, of course!

09 Jan 20 - 03:24 PM (#4027371)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

And the grand prize winner of the 6 ft. ham submarine sandwich is bwl.
don't hog it all.

No one took a stab at the veiled cannabalism posts!?!

09 Jan 20 - 05:17 PM (#4027395)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

ETs eating Alaskan homesteaders is not cannibalism.

We resolved that issue way back in the early days of the MOAB when freds (an ET species) attempted to eat khandu. Freds eating humans (and khandu is purported to be human) is not cannibalism. Freds eating freds is cannibalism. Humans eating freds is not cannibalism, though why anyone would want to eat freds, who reportedly taste like aluminum foil, is a mystery.

But I suppose anything is edible with enough Tapatio sauce on it.

09 Jan 20 - 05:40 PM (#4027400)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Great minds think alike. Everything old is new again.

We share only 99% of ET DNA.
Does that mean Chimps
are on the menu for us?

Hey Little Hawk...

09 Jan 20 - 09:14 PM (#4027418)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thanks SRS Iffin ah dunt nowed buter they seem dyslexic or rural

09 Jan 20 - 11:24 PM (#4027429)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Chimps are eaten. It's called "bush meat" and it is found (usually) in small African villages. You can find more on the WWW, if you want to.

10 Jan 20 - 06:15 AM (#4027475)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

bush meat poses an ebola threat in our biggest cities but Idaho is bushmeat free.

10 Jan 20 - 09:23 AM (#4027503)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Because of the link between bush meat and Ebola, I always buy my chimpanzee meat from Walmart, where it's guaranteed to have been produced in inhumane factory farms, but under Ebola-free conditions.

10 Jan 20 - 05:22 PM (#4027564)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Idaho has: superior voting rights
but not an ERA ratification.
No bushmeat but screwy property taxes.
It has a Walmart but no fresh
crispy creme donuts
Black and white is seperate as in
black ice and white snow
When snow covers the ice, there are
awkward white rappers.

10 Jan 20 - 11:14 PM (#4027586)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Things in Idaho ARE black and white. (Moscow is the home of the University of Idaho.)

11 Jan 20 - 07:57 AM (#4027640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Krispy Kreme doughnuts are available fresh at the nearby Maverick gas station and convenience store.

11 Jan 20 - 09:16 AM (#4027654)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Of course. But at Walmart they only sell discounted 2 week old KKdonuts where the crisp coating has liquified.

11 Jan 20 - 10:18 AM (#4027661)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Krispy Kreme donuts are mediocrity personified. They aren't exactly horrible, but the donuts offered by almost any neighborhood bakery put them to shame.

11 Jan 20 - 10:34 AM (#4027663)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

With all due respect to Homer there are some angelic healthy donuts as bwl says.

11 Jan 20 - 10:22 PM (#4027749)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We are fortunate to have two or three outstanding doughnut shops (those are higher-class than donut shops), but nobody makes Parker House rolls.

12 Jan 20 - 10:45 AM (#4027793)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Donuts were the discussion last week when my son was visiting from Seattle. It seems the donuts available up there are more like cake donuts, and he doesn't like Krispy Kreme; the ones he prefers are found all over this region, a light yeast donut that is mostly air but without the enhanced sugar formula of the KK variety. I see an investment opportunity in Seattle - donuts for relocated Texans.

12 Jan 20 - 11:49 AM (#4027805)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hermaphrodite Doe nuts are an entirely different matter.

12 Jan 20 - 05:54 PM (#4027886)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

One shop here claims to use the original Spudnut recipe. I don't know if they do or not, but they make really good doughnuts.

12 Jan 20 - 06:49 PM (#4027896)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Idaho should be famous for glazed donuts. After all, REAL glazed donuts are made with potato flour, not wheat flour.

13 Jan 20 - 02:02 AM (#4027922)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Kolaches (a Czech pastry popular in Central Texas) have a similar dough to the doughnuts made down here - this may be more than just a coincidence.

13 Jan 20 - 04:27 PM (#4028102)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

After all this talk of chimp brains and donuts I'm getting hungry.

13 Jan 20 - 06:35 PM (#4028141)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

There's a little shop in South Kinshasa that makes the best chimp-brain stuffed donuts! I understand that they take WWW orders and will ship, if you can find the URL. (It's said to be run by a Nigerian prince!)

13 Jan 20 - 07:44 PM (#4028162)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For bushmeat the password is sausage

13 Jan 20 - 08:46 PM (#4028173)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

QUARK!

Gluon! Dammit, stop humping my leg! Git down! Down!!!

QUARK!

Yes, I'm glad to see you too! Put that down!!! Don't eat that!!

QUARK!

STILLY!!! SOMEBODY!!!! Come git this duckdog!!!!

QUARK!

13 Jan 20 - 11:10 PM (#4028186)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Oh no, Mom! Gluon appears to be ill! According to the theory of quantum chromodynamics, he/she should always QUARK in vibrant living colors (Gluon seems to like red and green). If she/he is QUARKing in black and white there's something wrong!

I suspect it may have something to do with the kick in the rear he/she received after relieving herself/himself on the front wheel of the Galactic Overlord's Harley Davidson.

14 Jan 20 - 06:25 AM (#4028230)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

After sniffing the tire, I suspect diabetes.

14 Jan 20 - 08:39 AM (#4028257)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

New era quotes:

MEDIOCRATISTS UNITE you have nothing to lose but your brains!

Damn the Pompeo full greed ahead

I don't regret I have but one dime to give for my country

14 Jan 20 - 09:37 PM (#4028392)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Gluon's still hanging around, humping various things.

QUARK!! QUARK!!
QUARK!!

15 Jan 20 - 06:53 AM (#4028444)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

It certainly looks like Gluon is feeling better! He/she must have successfully removed the Galactic Overlord's boot from his/her cloaca.

15 Jan 20 - 03:25 PM (#4028509)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In addition to being the anniversary of my parents’ wedding (an event of cosmic importance) January 15 is also the anniversary of this event.

16 Jan 20 - 04:33 PM (#4028675)
Subject: RE: Goodbye Moon
From: Donuel

Goodbye Moon
behind the smoke
goodbye dog
I heard choke

Goodbye little kittens
goodbye florists
Warnings were written
about rain forests

Goodbye green trees
stiff and black
burn in the breeze
Goodbye science attack

Goodbye fair Oz
and a billion creatures
The stock market
is now Earth's best feature

DH 2020

17 Jan 20 - 08:49 AM (#4028711)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

As I sit here looking out the window, long before the sunrise, it's really dark out there. It's obvious proof yet again of the truth of the Bradley-Curran Darkon Theory. How long will Science be blind to The Truth?

17 Jan 20 - 10:48 AM (#4028727)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Lets hope science does not investigate the quantum notion that somtimes human beings pass between different quantum worlds to extend their life. There would be so much traffic between universes in the multiverse everyone's commute would be ******

17 Jan 20 - 12:29 PM (#4028754)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I'm reminded of the scene in the James Stewart film Mr. Hobbs Takes a Vacation in which the teenage son turns on a light in the dilapidated beach house the family has rented. The light is so dim that he says, "That's not a light! That's a dark! When you turn it on, the room gets darker!"

17 Jan 20 - 06:44 PM (#4028809)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I just killed a computer. Ripped out the hard drive, tore the RAM from its guts. Before I did that I formatted and deleted all over the HDD. Call me a killer, call me a electron-thirsty murderer. Now, before disposing of the corpse and the HDD (I'll keep the RAM and transplant it!) I'll do a physical wipe of the HDD propane torch!!!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

17 Jan 20 - 07:57 PM (#4028823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Heck, all I do to dispose of old computers is bury them at an undisclosed location on my property. Okay, I may take out a few frustrations on them with axes, sledgehammers, or firearms first, but burying is the main thing. A four foot deep hole at a random spot somewhere on 7.5 acres of woodland and ain't nobody ever finding that sucker. At least, not while I'm alive. And if someone finds it after I'm dead, I don't care.

17 Jan 20 - 08:17 PM (#4028824)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

BWL I have been known to quote that line from that movie myself, when encountering a really dim bulb. Come to think of it, the whole nation should be quoting that line, considering the dim bulbs in power the last three years.

I myself have culled a lot of old computer stuff this week. And though it would be nice to take it to Goodwill, I suspect most of it doesn't work, so instead I'll drop it off next week in an eWaste bin, saving Goodwill shoppers from buying then returning these funky computer speakers, etc.

There's a little snippet of Gluon here at my house, a few sloughed off molecules that add up to a small dog portion of a duckdog. She's a high-energy marauder and we're trying to reduce the energy level by having her spend less time (like overnight) in the kennel. It seems she reaches near critical mass by morning so when the door is opened she flies all over the house and yard like a ricochetting beebee.

17 Jan 20 - 09:43 PM (#4028834)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hillary just used a hammer.

Correction: One does not actually extend their life by slipping into a different potentiality quantum wise. They simply are propeled into a future because they stepped into a vorticies surrounding a microscopic black hole of stopped time. Some unfortunate souls are lost forever (to us) but most just enter at a perfect tangent which allows for an expulsion into a new time line. While no time passes to the happless wanderer, confusion or psychosis can sometimes occur. In 6 billion years many have taken this strange journey without harmful consequences so don't worry, it is a rare event and probably won't happen to you. However real dangers arise when the vorticies grow up to a quarter mile sphere under ideal circumstances.

For the vast majority only seconds to hours are 'lost'. A few of the miniature black holes are tidally locked and are deliberately accessable. Most travel at various speeds or in subterrainean orbits one would never encounter.

So lifespans remain the same no matter how many jumps are innertaken/undertaken and overtaken. Sorry for the confusion.

If you encounter a nebulous ball of dark soft light, it is best left alone.

17 Jan 20 - 10:02 PM (#4028836)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Imagine if BWL has a nosey neighbor whose curiosity is piqued when he sees bwl carrying a sack with a rectagle out line and a shovel.
? hmm "whats in the bag, a dead cat or box of money!"
"its money" he thinks as he tracks you on his phone.

7 acres doesn't seem that big

18 Jan 20 - 09:36 AM (#4028892)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Or, in Bee-Dub's case, the neighbor thinks, "Hmmm...taking another body to the crocs in the pond. Aw, hell, who cares? They ain't from around here."

18 Jan 20 - 11:05 AM (#4028910)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Overall 'not caring' is a more constant factor in decision making than greed, so Rap's scenario is more likely.
I don't care.

I bought a bunch of external hard drives at the 'Unique Gifts' jumk store. For a lark I took them to 'Things remembered' at the Mall and had them engraved 'Hillary Rodam Clinton 2012-2018' and tossed them about ROCK CREEK PARK.

18 Jan 20 - 02:33 PM (#4028949)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When I saw the polar ice cap melt I did't care
because I'm not a polar bear
When I saw the Amazon Forest burn I didn't care
because I'm not a tropical tree
When I saw Australia burn I didn't care
because I'm not a Kangaroo
When I saw gas regulations recinded I rejoiced
because I am a Republican heavily invested in oil
When food and water became scarce I didn't care
because I had invested in oil.

18 Jan 20 - 02:47 PM (#4028951)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When my grand children did not survive I did not care
because that left more food for those of us who lied
For I am the staunch I am the hardy I was wise

18 Jan 20 - 03:20 PM (#4028956)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

My neighbors don't seem very concerned with my activities. They're usually busy chewing their cuds and depositing big smelly turds all over their pasture.

And that's the human ones. The cattle are another matter all together.

19 Jan 20 - 07:42 AM (#4029020)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

maybe this one deserves a rewrite:

When I saw the polar ice caps melt I did't care
because I am not a polar bear
When I saw the Amazon Forest burn I didn't care
because a stupid tree isn't rare
When I saw Australia burn I didn't care
because I'm not a god damn Kangaroo
I rejoice that clean air laws are removed
because I'm a Republican invested in black gold
When food and water became scarce I didn't care
because I had invested in the best thing sold.
When my grand children did not survive I cried
because that left more food for we who lied
I am hardy, presient, funny and wise
When all there is to eat is money
I will not regret I will not run
I still have my golden gun

19 Jan 20 - 07:52 AM (#4029021)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

but I am out of
ammunition

19 Jan 20 - 08:52 AM (#4029028)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I dedicate this poem to my neighbor Rod Serling and his Irish Setters Randy and Rex. RIP

I suppose you don't know I have assembled hundreds of poems/lyrics on this site over 20 years. Now that they are all gone I remind you that Amos said I have the heart of a poet. He never said I had the mind or pen of a poet. :^/

now back to poopy pastures.

19 Jan 20 - 11:11 AM (#4029044)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Donuel, if you want to find those poems you can. It takes time, but they're all there, you just can't go to the entire thread at once. And there is the Mudcat Poetry Corner - didn't you post there as well? At least none of the MOAB poets are offering the maudlin pap that Walksabout Verse keeps sharing and re-sharing, living in the past and insisting on offering those backward-looking links. Amos put him in his place and and that pretty much took care of it, and you can tell Amos is gone now by the proliferation of bad poetry.

Back to the regular BS. Clever move on the hard drives, Donuel. Just so they don't cite Hillary for littering. . .

19 Jan 20 - 02:43 PM (#4029080)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: khandu

I am not a guest, but I am aghast! I see fred has been mentioned recently on this thread. It has been a long standing unspoken understanding that the freds were no longer to be mentioned. Yet, there they are. Now, feral piiigs are certainly worthy of discussion. I myself ordered a flock of piiigs from Amazon. Unfortunately, I did not know the group name of piiigs. I thought they were called a "murder".

As a sad result, the Amazonians slaughtered a disturbing amount of innocent feral piiigs, thinking they were doing the King's will. In effect, I have been splattered with innocent blood.
Life has it's upsetting moments. The mention of freds and the murder of feral piiigs we're two of those upsetting moments and, amazingly, they occurred on the same day. Further investigation indicated they occurred the same hour (CST)!
This leaves me with a hanging head. I hate hanging heads. Therefore, I do only what I know to do...come to Mom and throw myself into her hopefully merciful and loving arms. That she may softly pat me and say, "There, there", or, perhaps, "Here, here".
I am aghast, with a hanging head to boot.

khandu

19 Jan 20 - 03:11 PM (#4029086)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I used to think Walkabout verse had the gall bladder of a poet.
After a time consuming ressurection I might find 3 out of a hundred worth posterity. Most were like fast food. Instant gratification followed by regret. I recall 'cracks in my life' was better than I deserved. They're all in the wind and difficult to catch long enough to write down.

"I love you in a place where there's no space and time" came to me 20 years before the song. Rap has some originals that should be published before the MOAB credo* passes into obscurity.

* In obscurum uteri omnius flatulem qui consummtio eternum.

19 Jan 20 - 03:56 PM (#4029098)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Many of you don't know that BWL writes sit com for the Mom series.
Including him.

19 Jan 20 - 05:36 PM (#4029117)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There are several collective nouns that can be used to describe a group of piiigs. You can call them a "flooock" or a "heeerd" or just about anything as long as the word has three sequential instances of the same vowel. I prefer "shiiitload" myself.

19 Jan 20 - 06:07 PM (#4029118)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Down here in Texas they're called "barbeeeque."

19 Jan 20 - 06:09 PM (#4029119)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

By the way, I don't recall any edict about not mentioning freds. Perhaps I was out well on that day.

19 Jan 20 - 07:31 PM (#4029139)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: GUEST, freds

FROM: freds
TO: Khandu and similar putrid sorts

We have been elsewhen but were jerked back by a mention of us by someone called Khandu.

Like a genie, we must now do his, her, or its bidding.

What is your wish, Oh King?

19 Jan 20 - 11:27 PM (#4029158)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Don't ya think there's something a bit fishy about a bunch of ETs who once attempted to have khandu for lunch now promising to do his bidding?

Personally, I would trust freds about as much as I'd trust a Nigerian prince hawking reverse mortgages door-to-door.

19 Jan 20 - 11:50 PM (#4029163)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Heck, you don't need to go to Nigeria to find fishy Nigerian prince hawking reverse mortgages door-to-door—Steven Mnnnnunchin is best friends with an American "investment" scoundrel who steals homes from thousands of Americans via reverse-mortgages (Obama gave them too much leeway and Trump has no interest in fixing that problem).

20 Jan 20 - 12:17 AM (#4029164)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: khandu

I am befuddled and bedazzled. More on that later.
Bee-dud, I am in awe of your knowledge of feral piiigs! You astound me, as you have always astounded me. Perhaps astonish is more fitting. Amaze, hmm, naw, astonish.
Nonetheless, I do think that had I ordered a muuurder of piiigs, the results would have been the same. It would have, according to the 3-vowel-rule, been proper to do so, yet equally as deadly. This is why I have the hanging head. Some things just have no good solution.
As to the freds, no, there was no edict as such. There was, if you recall, as I stated last Eve, a "long-standing, unspoken, understanding". Surely, you remember us not speaking of it. We didn't speak of it constantly in your presence. I clearly remember several times it was unspoken. I also remember your not objecting...am I not correct?

Now that we have settled that (permanently, I trust), on to my bedazzlement and my befuddlement...
It is my understanding that guest cannot post "below the line" as they say, in the .BS section. One must be a member to post down here.
Yet, clear as transparent dookie, there us a post by a " guest: freds"!
With that, I believe this is an imposter trying to get me to thinks freds will do my bidding when the reality of it is that freds never want to do my bidding! Nay! They only want to suck out my natural vitality and strength, leaving me a helpless and hopeless mass of gelatinous goo, as I have seen them do to people like Harry Lee Wigley and Sheeny Knause. You recall them? How long has it been since you heard of them? Huh?
Nay, this poster is an imposter. But how did he post as a guest where no guest may post?
I am not a god but I am agog.
khandu

20 Jan 20 - 09:10 AM (#4029196)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

freds, I suspect, can override our puny technology. I seem to remember that they have said, somewhere, that they use Gluon as a saddle horse.

20 Jan 20 - 09:33 AM (#4029198)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Steve, freds, Trump, piiigs, this place is suddenly surrounded by villains. Is self defense warranted? If so the smallest but most powerful weapon there is the space balm (nano sized black holes) that would suck villains off to another space and time.

20 Jan 20 - 11:20 AM (#4029214)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: khandu

I have been considering space balm. It is an extreme measure but freds are an extreme threat unless their extremities are removed. Sadly, this removal is done by having the freds to eat discounted two week old KK donuts where the crisp costing has liquified
The difficulty is not getting them to eat the previously mentioned donuts, freds love them. The problem is knowing where to purchase fresh discounted two week old KK donuts. As described above.
khandu

20 Jan 20 - 12:14 PM (#4029225)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: khandu

They use glue on their saddle horse? How odd. But they are an odd species.
Yea, I am sure you are correct about their ability to override our technology. In many ways, they are a brilliant bunch. Indeed, except for their stupidity, their childishness, and their obsession with Joan Crawford porn, they are to be envied.
khandu

20 Jan 20 - 12:52 PM (#4029231)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

A random dip back into the Khandu MOAB archive (a haphazard process that must be done by searching on the post history of each individual) shows lots of references to Shatner and the Bush (Dubya) administration. Who knew back then that that wasn't the height of crazy? That people would crave the days of Baby Bush in contrast to the toxic excrement (not BS) extruded right now?

This works as a silly antidote/anecdote.

20 Jan 20 - 01:55 PM (#4029236)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The connection between Krispy Kreme donuts and extraterrestrial life forms is well documented. If you visit a KK restaurant at two or three AM, half the "people" sitting there drinking coffee are space aliens. That's because humans who visit Kripy Kreme at that time of day/night are frequently in some altered state of consciousness which makes them highly susceptible to "alien abduction".

See, here's the thing about "alien abductions": Nobody actually gets abducted, but the aliens use their telepathic skills to make humans believe they've been abducted. It's just a way for ETs to relieve boredom while serving out their hitches observing the goings on of our puny species.

Oh, there used to be genuine alien abductions, but the ETs learned all they needed to know about our biology long ago. And they got tired of having to clean up beer barf after abducting humans who turned out to be drunker than expected. Telepathically induced "abductions" are just as much fun and far more sanitary.

20 Jan 20 - 02:51 PM (#4029253)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Having colluded with many UFO experts and researchers the question remains where UFO driving freds come from. Space.com is currently suggesting they come from our future. To my way of thinking they can only come from our past (As Eienstien shows) which may have had sufficiently advanced technology and plenty of time to learn how to drive like maniacs but more safely. Look at all the crashes they had in the 40's and 50's. They hardly ever crash anymore. Either that or DWI UFO laws are more strict. If I were to admit to an instinct about these ufo driving maniacs I would guess they came from a prehistoric civilization that we now call India. Curiously the current drivers in India have a similar penchant for driving like idiots just like freds.

20 Jan 20 - 02:56 PM (#4029254)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I hope I am not being stereotypically racist about these 'expert' drivers.

20 Jan 20 - 03:05 PM (#4029258)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If they do not come from Earth's present, past or future, all bets are off. They would be Pennyless, Maryless and certainly Ruthless.

20 Jan 20 - 03:13 PM (#4029260)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Many have reported that they do seem Tomless Dickless and Harryless.

20 Jan 20 - 03:31 PM (#4029266)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Some of the documentation BWL references is recently in dispute.

Dr. Forester Horsemen has devoted his life to studying UFO hot spots like donut shops. He has concluded that freds organically produce LSD that cause them to view KK shops in particular to be Plastic Palaces of Pleasure. (sorry I spit) It will be their undoing however since fred metabolism is highly susceptible to diabetes.

It makes me think of War of the Worlds.

Dr. Horsemen is currently in the Deleware institute of LSD overdoses.

20 Jan 20 - 04:00 PM (#4029269)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hahahahahoooey did I say Deleware Institute of LSD Overdose? hahahahah
Well of course i meant (DIALOGUE) hahaha Delaware Institute about LSD Great Unusual Encounters HEEHeeheehahhahahahahhahahs
aaoaaaaaahhhhhhhhaaaaaaamckkghgurg hoohaw

[Come along Dr. Forester]

20 Jan 20 - 04:25 PM (#4029272)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Sorry about that. He got my phone.

20 Jan 20 - 04:32 PM (#4029273)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

He seems to have forgotten about the overdoses but at least he could spell Delaware. You should consider freds armed and dangerous.

20 Jan 20 - 04:47 PM (#4029276)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: khandu

Horsemen was whispered to be one of the Apocalypse Horsemen. Perhaps he is. H.L.Wigley was doing an expose of the sordid Horseman/Hillary affair. Days before publication, Wigley vanished, leaving none of his writings. No trace of him had been found.
I applaud Donuel, BeeDub, and Silly River! Your knowledge of freds, UFOs, and KK is unsurpassed. No, no, don't protest. You deserve it!

In fact, the three of you are the unspoken pride of Mudcat! Just last evening, I over heard Max and the Mudmen not saying a word about you three! Yes, yes, it is true!
Carry on, fine humans, carry on.

20 Jan 20 - 05:32 PM (#4029289)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I picked this paraphrased bit of wisdom from Tim Dorsey's latest book, Naked Came the Florida Man:

The gist of modern politics is this: All you have to do to get beef cattle to vote for the guy who owns the slaughterhouse is convince them that it's dairy cattle who are the problem.

20 Jan 20 - 05:49 PM (#4029296)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The mystery imposter host poster is a suspicious character who has moved near Club Aria 54 in Arizona for undisclosed reasons called keboroxu.
I know, it has a fred dialect doesn't it?

20 Jan 20 - 06:20 PM (#4029303)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Florida
New Jersey
Texas
Georgia
Maryland
Number 1 to #5 most stressed out States

Dairy cows have it soft don't they

20 Jan 20 - 07:47 PM (#4029314)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

FYI: Stilly has to do with Stillaguamish, though I suppose there could have been moonshiners upstream way back when, with their stills. I know many family members made their own beer during Prohibition, but that doesn't require as much equipment. We leave the hard stuff to the NASCAR still operators in the hills and mountains of the SE.

20 Jan 20 - 08:26 PM (#4029318)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Did steamboats run on it? If steamboats didn't run on it it's not a real river.

Ezekiel 1:4-21 refers to the freds, or at least all the biblical scholars so say.

20 Jan 20 - 08:45 PM (#4029324)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Yes, and one of them was the flat-bottomed sternwheeler Preston that pulled deadheads out of the river to keep it navigable. It worked all up and down the west coast of the US (as part of the Army Corps of Engineers). Deadheads are the logs that broke out of log booms being floated down river from operations upstream, heading down to Puget Sound area mills. One end would sink and get stuck in the mud and the other end, under the surface, would impale unwitting boat operators. My cousin was the last captain of it before they retired it to a museum in Anacortes. Where Burl Ives lived until his death. (Unrelated, but there isn't a lot of Anacortes history to share, so I put both parts of it here to bulk up the post).

20 Jan 20 - 09:20 PM (#4029330)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Moonshining is almost a dead vocation in much of the Southeast. In most states it's fairly easy to get a license and open a boutique distillery (the distilled spirits equivalent to a microbrewery). Old moonshiners grandchildren are making way more money selling peppermint vodka and the like to lawyers than grandpa ever did selling rotgut 'shine to farmers.

But Mom still prefers the 'shine.

21 Jan 20 - 07:16 AM (#4029394)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Prohibition was good for some like the Capones and Kennedys.
Old fashioned bootlegging and running the slots south of Chicago was Grandpa's solution to Prohibition. Thanks to Grandma who as a young prescient girl married a guy who up and ran away subsequently finding oil in Oklahoma, fortunatly shared some of it with Grandma. Between him and Frank the bootlegger she had time to prospect as a rock hound finding many rare fossils like the Eohippus and other gems.
Booze, silver dollars from the slots and oil were the sins of the family fortune.
That is why I relatively reject all three in my liftime.
But fossils are cool.

My wife's side of the family may have some fred hybrids which is a dillemma. -bad driving and all-

21 Jan 20 - 07:58 AM (#4029405)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I see: deadheads are planters. Both'll take out the bottom of your boat. Or they could become sawyers. Rafts and steamboats make it a real river, unlike, say, the Portneuf (but it does have some good trout fishing in the colder headwaters).

My grandfather's still is still now, residing in the Quincy Museum (a far fairer venue than it ever had in its younger days). It works fine, but I am bound by an oath of silence as to how I know.

21 Jan 20 - 12:27 PM (#4029454)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

I do hope that Fred the Scottish Gritter Lorry is exempt
from all this carrying on about [them].

After all, there's only one of Fred the Scottish Gritter Lorry.
You can see him at the snowplough/snowplow tracker website.
Fred is hard at work on the West Coast of Scotland
and he has got most of Ayrshire to himself,
because most of the other gritters
are busy with Glasgow, Edinburgh, Aberdeen, Inverness, and the like.
Where would the West of Scotland be, I ask you,
without Fred the Gritter?

21 Jan 20 - 03:02 PM (#4029498)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Also excluded is King Ethelfred the Unready.

21 Jan 20 - 04:43 PM (#4029512)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Donuel scores a Perfect 10 for Ethelfred.

21 Jan 20 - 07:04 PM (#4029521)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Okay, gang, let us review freds protocol from way back in Mom's early days:

1) The only time "freds" is capitalized is when it is the first word in a sentence. Otherwise, the "f" is always lower case.

2) Freds is both plural and singular. There is no such thing as "a fred". That is because of freds' hive mind. You talkin' to one freds, you talking to all of 'em. However, that does not mean freds don't have individual characteristics. Some freds like to eat Mississippians, some like donuts. Some say Mississippians and donuts both taste like chicken so, fuck it, just eat chicken.

3) Freds have no distinct genders. The correct pronouns with which to refer to freds are hesheit (nominative case), himherit (oblique/objective case), and hishersits (possessive). However some freds look decidedly male or female to human perception. Like this freds.

4) Individual freds often have human-sounding names, though the characteristics normally associated with those names when they are born by humans may not apply. For example, the freds in the photo above is named Bubba. And this freds' name is Winona Ryder.

21 Jan 20 - 07:23 PM (#4029522)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If you would know what freds sound like, play the recording here.

21 Jan 20 - 08:04 PM (#4029527)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Yep my hive mind inlaws are part freds.

21 Jan 20 - 08:39 PM (#4029532)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mind you, freds are only part, a very small part, of that recording.

21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM (#4029535)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Having never read Earthly literature or grammer rules I will study these rules closely;
"3) Freds have no distinct genders. The correct pronouns with which to refer to freds are hesheit (nominative case), himherit (oblique/objective case), and hishersits (possessive). However some freds look decidedly male or female to human perception."

It may even help communication with my cross dressing son.

( I've noticed it takes about 4,000 years for a popular language to lose all need for pronouns like the Chinese.)

hmmm? Can one be a hybrid freds and not know it? Also do freds have unusually long lifespans.

21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM (#4029536)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I dunno if freds is/are actually on that recording Rap posted the link to, but my old band, June Apple, comes in at about minute 25 for a two-tune medley.

22 Jan 20 - 09:39 AM (#4029603)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Florida Man Breaks Into Home to Suck Toes

BRADENTON, Fla. (WPMI) - According to the Bradenton Herald , a 20-year-old victim was awakened by a man sucking on his toes around 3:30 a.m. on Christmas Eve.

The Manatee County Sheriff’s Office say a toe-sucking burglar broke into a Bradenton home on Christmas Eve.

Deputies who responded to the residence were told that the victim was sleeping in his bedroom when he was awakened by the suspect sucking on his toes, according to an incident report.

The victim asked the suspect what he was doing and the suspect stated he was "there to suck toes,” according to the report.

Deputies say a fight erupted and the suspect attempted to grab the victim's genitals and then threatened the victim, saying he had a gun.

According to the report, the victim never saw a gun, and managed to force the suspect out of the home. The suspect then smashed out a window to the home and then smashed the victim’s car windshield.

Deputies attempted to track the suspect with a police dog but were unsuccessful. DNA swabs were taken from the victim’s toes, according to the report.

Boy, that Florida Man sure does get around, doesn't he?

22 Jan 20 - 03:13 PM (#4029666)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Look at them toe suckers
ain't they neat
sittin there sucking them
big toe feet

Suckin them stinkers
suckin them good
suckin all ten
like you knew they would

How to be a toe sucker
ain't nuthin to it
jus open wide
rare back an do it

22 Jan 20 - 09:57 PM (#4029699)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In Idaho a toesucker is a fish. Not a nice fish like a cutthroat, but a rather trashy fish that is an invasive species from Florida.

22 Jan 20 - 11:12 PM (#4029701)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

This is readable on Instagram, but the friend who shared it has a private account, so I copied and pushed it to Flickr where you can barely make it out. If you're on Instagram and want to look for me to follow I can send it and you will read the most bizarre story you've seen for a while. (My name run together but three "r"s on the end instead of one.)

22 Jan 20 - 11:51 PM (#4029703)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Another episode in the adventures of Florida Man!

Florida Man Crashes Truck Into Bar to Steal Dr. Pepper

PANAMA CITY, Fla. — A Florida man was arrested after he crashed his vehicle into a bar to steal a Dr. Pepper, deputies told WMBB.

Gavin Lee, 28, is charged with armed burglary.

Bay County deputies were called to the Re-Rack Bar in Panama City on Friday morning after a reported burglary.

Lee attempted to get into the business even though it was closed, deputies said. When he couldn’t get in, he allegedly drove his truck through the front glass and went in.

Once inside the bar, Lee got a Dr. Pepper from the cooler, sat at a table in the bar and proceeded to enjoy the beverage, deputies said.

Deputies said Lee had a gun in his pocket during the burglary.

In contrast to the zany antics of Florida Man, Idaho Man seems to only commit serious crimes. Perhaps it's because we have more, better, and stronger drugs in Florida.

23 Jan 20 - 07:08 AM (#4029746)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

New York City man makes trillions of $'s from patent infringement lawsuits and fines. He claims that American inventions such as the light bulb and wheel are being misused globally so he is out there protecting America.

23 Jan 20 - 12:52 PM (#4029796)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

This may all be moot. The current adminstration has dropped a full twenty seconds off of the last two minutes for the Doomsday Clock.

23 Jan 20 - 02:33 PM (#4029804)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

And now there are iguanas fainting in the cold
and dropping out of the trees in Florida.

23 Jan 20 - 04:00 PM (#4029815)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I wonder if MOM would like to visit the first-ever museum of philosophy in Italy.

24 Jan 20 - 06:30 AM (#4029899)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

"In the winter of our discontent when a man unprincipled in private life, desperate in his fortune, bold in his temper, possessed of some talents, having the example of military nazi habits - despotic in his ordinary demeanor - known to have scoffed in private at the principles of liberty - when such a man is seen to mount the porn queen of popularity - to join in the cry of danger to liberty - to take every opportunity of embarrassing the General Government and bringing it under suspicion - when right doesn't matter to elected people - to flatter and fall in with all the nonsense of the zealots of the day - when no one in his party casts a profile of courage - it may justly be suspected that his object is to throw things into confusion and division that he may 'ride the storm and direct the whirlwind'"

When right does not matter and few care, we are lost as a nation of laws or families for freedom. Our last best hope is for mothers and women to rebel until the nation comes to its senses.

24 Jan 20 - 09:04 AM (#4029917)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We in Idaho only deal with prosaic, and therefore ordinary, crimes. No axe murders for us! Sure, we have stagecoach holdups, claim jumpings, cache robberies, stacked and/or marked deck recriminations, back shootings, things involving 'very attractive ewes', opium smoking, horse theft, dry gulching, mine salting, passing bad money, stealing coal from the railroads, cattle rustling, mail theft, some bad Indian agents, and now and then a lynching, but who doesn't? None of these "love killings" for us! No sirree ma'am! We have the good old-fashioned crimes! OUR political bribes are done in the broad, open light of day! None of this skittering about like roaches when the lights come on for OUR politicians! They're as honest as old Caleb Lyons himself!

24 Jan 20 - 09:15 AM (#4029918)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What of the retired Idaho librarian who is only capable of speaking in partial or complete book titles? This rare neurological condition does not effect his writing and of course is not a crime but reveals Idaho as a mystical land that harbors the bizzare well hidden from the world.

24 Jan 20 - 10:41 AM (#4029926)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The recent cold snap which sent the Miami area's temperatures down into the 40's was not in any way unprecedented. It happens every decade or so. But it was the first such cold snap since the Great Iguana Population Explosion.

No, iguanas are not native to Florida. Like Burmese pythons and lion fish, they're an invasive species, descendants of pets who either escaped or were released into the wild by their owners. When they began falling from trees last week, they should have been barbecued instead of rescued. What South Florida needs is a few good iguana recipes.

24 Jan 20 - 02:00 PM (#4029954)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

but, then, Bee dubya ell,
I read that Miami is big on Cubans cooking up the iguanas,
they have a Spanish word for the cooked meat
as opposed to the live critter ...
forget what it is though ...
and they can be sold in markets that way !

24 Jan 20 - 02:27 PM (#4029964)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

That is good to know, Keb. Eating one's way out of an environmental disaster is always a good solution.

I'm just not sure the folks in South Florida understand the "Them's good eatin'!" thing quite as well as we Floribamians.

24 Jan 20 - 08:26 PM (#4030038)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

BURMESE PYTHON NUGGETS

INGREDIENTS

Python meat, ground or chopped finely

1 egg

1 cup milk

1/2 cup flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon minced garlic

1 tablespoon Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning

1 teaspoon cayenne pepper

DIRECTIONS:

1. Beat the egg and milk together in a bowl.

2. In a separate bowl, combine the flour, salt, garlic, Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning and cayenne pepper.

3. Dip the nuggets in the egg mixture, and then dredge in the flour mixture.

4. Deep fry at 375 degrees until crispy and golden brown.

24 Jan 20 - 11:25 PM (#4030049)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Burmese Pythons! Now, them's some good eatin'! Tastes sorta like a cross between iguana, feral pig, and chicken.

25 Jan 20 - 12:40 AM (#4030054)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Prit near everthing tastes like chicken. Fella out here ate a cedar stump and said it tasted like chicken.

25 Jan 20 - 02:08 AM (#4030060)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Revenge of the Bushmeat by Claude Balls has soared to the top of the Best Yeller list. It is a wonderful treatise on the pros and cons of eating wild animals as well as pets. Claude treats the dangers and new flavors equally.
Many of the recipes use Panko instead of flour and it really makes a difference. Some of the desserts are quite exotic, like Prion Pudding.

25 Jan 20 - 02:25 AM (#4030061)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

FOR MOAB POSTERS ONLY

25 Jan 20 - 05:28 AM (#4030082)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

They have Prion Pudding at our City Hospital. Spicy.

25 Jan 20 - 02:40 PM (#4030165)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Florida Man Sets House on Fire to Keep Warm

By: Joe Kelley
Published: January 24, 2020 6:11 AM

There's a lot of flawed logic happening here.

A man in St. Petersburg, Florida was arrested Tuesday morning (January 21st) for setting a fire inside his apartment to stay warm.

Sixty-six-year-old Mark Okrent allegedly set fire to a stack of paperwork in his apartment around 3 a.m., and police report the flames were large enough to set off smoke detectors.

No one was injured, but Okrent has been charged with arson in the first degree.

Police also say he had several other options available to him that could've helped him get warm.

Please note that this particular specimen of Florida Man is of the Central Florida subspecies. Members of the Northern/Panhandle subspecies know what heaters are.

25 Jan 20 - 02:48 PM (#4030169)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Are there no hats or sweaters in Florida? Surely a few are there because of all of the relocated New Yorkers?

Programming Note: I've had as much as I can stand of politics for a while. I'm switching the radio to classical for the rest of the day. The way Pompeo treated Mary Louise Kelly yesterday pretty much did me in (and they're talking about it today and replaying the interview). I hope she landed a knee to the groin before she left the room. Now I'm off to play with the dogs and do some chores that have been calling out so long that it's now a loud chorus that needs to be muffled.

25 Jan 20 - 04:39 PM (#4030181)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Florida man vs. Darwin Award winners
FL CLOSES IN ON THE DARWIN FOLKS

One man in Vero Beach, Florida, can claim to have such fiery devotion for the Dallas Cowboys, but for now he'll have to root on his favorite team while recovering from severe burns to his body. According to the Sebastian Daily, a 27-year-old man was rushed to the hospital after lighting himself ablaze after watching Sunday's Cowboys-Packers game. The incident reportedly came as a result of a lost bet after Aaron Rodgers led Green Bay down the field in a last-minute drive that gave the Packers a 35-31 win.At the hospital, deputies spoke with a couple who admitted they were watching the NFL game and agreed to burn the losing team's jersey. However, the man decided to wear the jersey as it was burning. A witness told Sebastian Daily, "He was set on fire after losing a bet on the Cowboys game … Skin was hanging off his arm and back." The man suffered third-degree burns on his right arm and right hand and second-degree burns to his back.

Such are the dangers of polyester in Florida. FL. hospitals are gearing up for the Super Bowl...

25 Jan 20 - 10:25 PM (#4030220)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh no! I'm from Illinois AND I was there last November! I'm gonna die of too much Corona! I know it! I can feel death's ice fingers now! Dammit, I just knocked over my beer.

25 Jan 20 - 11:14 PM (#4030225)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I suppose this Corona virus will have a negative impact on sales of Corona beer. Normal people don't drink beer named after a plague.

Then again, normal people don't drink beer with a lime slice stuck down the bottle's neck either.

26 Jan 20 - 09:17 AM (#4030270)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm aware of the lime slice. A beer was once served to me that way and the slice blocked getting the beer out. A guy next to me reached in to the get slice for his rum drink and got his fingers stuck in my beer bottle. Eventually an ambulance had to be called for him as others in the bar pitched in to help get his fingers out, but he did get the lime slice. Unfortunately, I never got to drink my beer and I never went back to that place. Citrus in beer! Humph!

26 Jan 20 - 01:26 PM (#4030319)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

That event, I should mention, happened at the bar at the Legion Hovel.

26 Jan 20 - 03:35 PM (#4030368)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Nonethless Corona cases are ending up in deportation camps.

27 Jan 20 - 07:57 AM (#4030500)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Anheuser-Busch InBev SA/NV, commonly known as AB InBev, is a Belgian-Brazilian multinational drink and brewing company based in Leuven, Belgium. AB InBev has a global functional management office in New York City, and regional headquarters in São Paulo, London, St. Louis, Mexico City, Bremen, Johannesburg and others. (Wikipedia)

Guess who owns/makes Corona AND Modelo beers! You get one guess.

27 Jan 20 - 08:12 AM (#4030501)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

InBev?

And to think of all the schmucks who tried to corner the Silver market.
They should have tried to corner the beer market.

Belgium is not known for chocolate anymore. Now its International weapons sales and beer. What a mix

27 Jan 20 - 09:07 AM (#4030512)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Does the Belgian ownership of Budweiser mean that they'll eventually be trading in their Clydesdales for Belgian draft horses?

By the way, Tecate and Dos Equis are owned by Heineken, which is next door to Belgium in The Netherlands. Next time you drink a "Mexican" beer, try not to think of chocolate or tulips.

27 Jan 20 - 09:47 AM (#4030522)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've seen small batch chocolate beer. Trouble is
like most animals taste like chicken, most beer tastes like beer.

27 Jan 20 - 12:04 PM (#4030541)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I've had chocolate-infused red wine -- it was pretty good.

27 Jan 20 - 12:33 PM (#4030547)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Chocolate originated in Mexico so you SHOULD be thinking about Mexico when you drink Mexican beer. Just sayin'.

27 Jan 20 - 02:11 PM (#4030575)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Remember that in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, "Belgium" is the ultimate off-color word on all planets save one. Earth is the only planet where the inhabitants are so clueless as to have named a country after a word the rest of the galaxy finds horribly offensive.

And as far as the lime thing goes, I suspect some genius decided that since lime is good in guacamole, it must be good in anything Mexican. Beer, salsa, Frida Khalo's underwear....

27 Jan 20 - 02:25 PM (#4030579)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Lime was given to British sailors with rum to prevent scurvy.

Hey! I'm working on a presentation on knowledge transfer/information diffusion. Maybe I should check the rates of scurvy prevention in the British Navy as a model of the speed of information diffusion and its results. (Yes, really. April 21.)

28 Jan 20 - 08:41 AM (#4030760)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM!

Guess what!

28 Jan 20 - 09:44 AM (#4030771)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom asks if Rap could narrow that "Guess what?" thing down a little. Given the infinite nature of the universe, there could probably be at least, oh, a few dozen possible answers.

Let's start with straight up or on the rocks? That should trim it down a bit.

28 Jan 20 - 10:24 AM (#4030785)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Peach Lime Chocolate?

28 Jan 20 - 12:31 PM (#4030809)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

You know what makes no sense? The saying "That's neither here nor there."

Look, if it's not here, it has to be there. "Here" means this place. "There" means some other place. If something is not in this place, then it must be in some other place. Otherwise, it doesn't exist at all. And if it doesn't exist, why are we wasting precious time and bandwidth talking about it?

28 Jan 20 - 02:34 PM (#4030830)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its a Wonderful Life huh BWL.
The movie introduced western civilization to non existence, what a concept. Non existence is a state that is not life, not death but it is a state of pure potentiality without any vestige of reality. It is absurd it is serious it is everything and nothing. Non existence 'are' the children you did not have before you died. It does not think therefore it 'am'. It is the Holy Ghost.

Non existence is neither here nor there.

28 Jan 20 - 03:15 PM (#4030840)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

making sense is a human bias.
The quantum does not make sense to us
WE are missing one small/huge piece
If we find it, it might make sense
and if it doesn't we're still
subject to its magic

28 Jan 20 - 07:48 PM (#4030885)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If the saying refers to geographical referents the subject under discussion could be anywhere else in the plenum of referents. The locus might also be in a sheaf of referents conjunctive, congruent, or tangential to said plenum. The meaning of the phrase is dependent upon the definition of the locus within its plenum of fictons.

It's quite like trying to define a point with only two reference points for the definition. "X8 Y5" defines a point on a graph, but the third point is actually the matter of the graph itself, or to put it more succinctly, the medium provides a third point for the message*.

Two points alone would define a line.

*Marshall McCluhan, Understanding Media: the Extensions of Man, 1964.

28 Jan 20 - 11:21 PM (#4030910)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I have received the following missive from Gluon:

QUARK!!!!

Translation: I once tried being neither here nor there, but wound up being here and there at the same time. Do not try this at home.

29 Jan 20 - 06:47 AM (#4030951)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

being here and there at the same time is conjunctive to the quantum potential of non existence. In total - we are working with 6 modes of possible realities similar to the ancient's depiction of the 6 pointed star.
The hexagram is found in cosmologic descriptions in India China kabbalah and Gurdjieff;

here
there
here/there
there/here
existence
non existence

29 Jan 20 - 07:16 AM (#4030957)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's a seventh node, as in "I node she was up to no good!"

29 Jan 20 - 08:32 AM (#4030965)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For starting this quandry of an enigma wrapped in the empitome of a mystery, BWL gets a Grabby award for the ultimaplicitudeness of Bull Shit. Rap gets runner up for a single quark and Donuel (as usual) gets a dishonorable unmentionable.

29 Jan 20 - 09:13 AM (#4030971)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

btw There is a current HBO series called 'the outsider' that deals with this phenomenon.

29 Jan 20 - 04:51 PM (#4031059)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Impossible. If you are an outsider you are also and simultaneously an insider, as you are inside the outside, for just as the outside contains the inside, so the inside contains the outside (see the discussion here for more information).

29 Jan 20 - 05:39 PM (#4031064)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Now, for the latest adventures of Florida Man!

Florida Man Hunting Iguanas With Pellet Guns Puts Two Schools on Lockdown

A man hunting iguanas with pellet guns led to two schools going into lockdown in Charlotte County on Tuesday afternoon, the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office says.

According to the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office, an armed man was seen near Vineland Elementary School, 467 Boundary Blvd., at about 3:30 p.m. The school and nearby L.A. Ainger Middle School were put on lockdown.

Within minutes a 35-year-old man was found and detained. The lockdowns were lifted.

The man told deputies he had been hired to remove invasive iguanas from the area and was carrying two pellet guns. Deputies told the man about the proper procedures to take before hunting and released him.

******************************************************************

Moral of the story? Don't be brandishin' yer Red Ryder near a schoolyard without permission.

29 Jan 20 - 06:49 PM (#4031075)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Everyone likes camping, but good camping sites are hard to find. Crowds, vandalism, charges, and other problems sometimes make them all but impossible! But there ARE places around here -- little known to all but those who live here. Every summer (and even during the other seasons) you can usually find good camping sites here. So don't let the crowds at Yellowstone or Grand Tetons scare you off! Come camping!

29 Jan 20 - 10:58 PM (#4031089)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You could head to Hanford Reach, that I see now is a National Monument that should be free to the downwinders born near the Hanford Plant (I, alas, am one).

30 Jan 20 - 07:44 AM (#4031137)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I used to live downwind from Rocky Flats

I moved after the big fire

30 Jan 20 - 09:08 AM (#4031153)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

When I buy cottage cheese, it comes in pint or quart containers. If it came in 55-gallon drums, would it still be cottage cheese? Or would it be over-sized McMansion with three-car garage and more rooms than you're ever going to use cheese?

30 Jan 20 - 12:54 PM (#4031199)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

If I owned a dairy that made cottage cheese, I'd call it "bungalow cheese" instead. Cottages and bungalows are both small houses, but "bungalow" is more fun to say.

"Cottage" sounds like a noise a frog or insect would make. "Bungalow" sounds more like an incantation that would open a magic door or lure a genie from a bottle.

30 Jan 20 - 01:16 PM (#4031203)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

"Bungalow" sounds like a disease of the foot: "Poor Harry! He's limping from his bungalow on his left foot."

30 Jan 20 - 04:06 PM (#4031222)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

"Mr. Smith, the tests show that you have a scrotal bungalow and we need to do surgery as soon as possible."

30 Jan 20 - 05:44 PM (#4031238)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Then there are "bungaloids", discussion of which may be an affront to Mom's delicate sensibilities.

31 Jan 20 - 06:15 AM (#4031312)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Bungletoe and bunglesack have nothing on bungleoids which tend to tightly grow together with cartiledge as thick and dense as a Wombat's rear end. This is why bungloidosis is also called Wombatism.

31 Jan 20 - 06:33 AM (#4031320)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In Africa it is called Babboon Butt. Severe cases require a colestomy

31 Jan 20 - 06:17 PM (#4031427)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My neighbor, Mr. Thomas Kolenos, is offended by that term and asks that you apologize.

31 Jan 20 - 10:46 PM (#4031468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It sounds like one of those words that the colonial British picked up in India and then it travelled through the English-speaking world. Like pyjamas. Now pajamas.

01 Feb 20 - 09:44 AM (#4031536)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The lascar, a bunyip if ever I saw one, was the moofty. He was a peon, not a pundit, but he was also a guyenda. The dacoits poured ghee on him.

01 Feb 20 - 10:49 AM (#4031552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Because of what I call Forest Gump like coincidence I have known Mob bosses all my life starting with the big boss meeting in my hometown of Appalacain NY , between Owego and Vestal. I have seen bosses get away with crimes via witness tampering or murder, but only at first. Eventually the boss gets caught red handed or eliminated.

As a therapist in pre Soprano times I had a Mob boss from Irondiquoit as a client during the A team B team wars in NY. He brought his body guard with him for his session. When my secretary came in the back door with McDonalds there was a dramatic moment.

I even heard the long drawn out roar of an explosion of the car that killed a different boss, I accidently learned that the police knew of the hit ahead of time. Later a nurse who treated the boss who was car bombed told me he was in one piece but died slowly of pressure induced massive capillary bleed.

A previous tenent left a list of victims that had already been eliminated and the list was found under the sink. Against all odds I even met Mr. Gambino and others via car dealership associations in Buffalo NY.

There were more shocking coincidences that I hesitate to mention that the police wanted me to cover up. It involved the mob stealing back evidence and heroin from a State Police station. I had the recording of the details off a special radio receiver that preceded microwave telephones. What seemed to stop these string of coincidences
was simply getting married and retiring from hypnosis.

Anyway Trump is a bit like a mob boss and I expect he will face a similar fate once loyalty becomes too costly.

01 Feb 20 - 03:27 PM (#4031607)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

It's February First! Does that mean idiots will finally stop wishing me Happy New Year?

Has it ever occurred to you that years don't get to have birthdays? When they get to be a year old, POOF! They're gone!

Just when we've gotten* used to having a year around, someone kills it off and foists a new one on us.

Don't plan on making a cake that says, "Happy Birthday 2020!" You'd be wasting your time.

What if they did that with puppies? "Here's a cute little puppy, kid, but don't get too attached to it. A year from now, we're gonna kill it and give you a new one!"

I wonder if 2020 knows that it's doomed? Eleven months from now and it's gonna be defenestrated.

* Have you noticed that our British cousins have abandoned "gotten" as the past participle of "get" and use "got" for both past and past participle? Still sounds wrong to me.)

01 Feb 20 - 10:23 PM (#4031671)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Defenestration? Are you in Prague by any chance?

02 Feb 20 - 12:14 AM (#4031678)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Yes, on December 31st, they'll coax 2020 way up high in some skyscraper overlooking Times Square. "Come one, 2020, you've gotta see this cool disco ball! And this is the best viewpoint in the world!"

And as soon as that glittery ball starts dropping, they'll push poor old 2020 out a window. And nobody will notice or care. They'll be so busy being all goo-goo over cute little 2021 that they won't even see 2020's poor carcass lying on the sidewalk smashed so flat it'll make a pancake look like a major mountain range.

02 Feb 20 - 03:48 AM (#4031685)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Senoufou

We live in a bungalow. (Everyone in UK calls our type of house by this Hindi/Urdu word, derived from 'bangla') Bungalows used to be regarded/disparaged as houses for the elderly, being on one floor only. But I've seen recently that young families prize them, having no stairs and quite large gardens. Ours has gone up considerably in value during the last ten years. (up by £50,000!!!)
There are dozens of words from the Raj days in our language. Gymkhana, juggernaut, chutney etc.

02 Feb 20 - 08:33 AM (#4031741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yes, there are a couple in my post of February 1. Except for one noun.

02 Feb 20 - 09:32 AM (#4031755)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

SRS, do you know that there's a WinCo in the DFW area?

02 Feb 20 - 09:35 AM (#4031757)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

02/02/2020! Palindrome!!!!!!

02 Feb 20 - 10:30 AM (#4031769)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

02 02 2020 at 2PM
Kitten Bowl!

02 Feb 20 - 11:30 AM (#4031777)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

02 02 2020 Groundhog day

02 Feb 20 - 11:48 AM (#4031780)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

What's unique about 02/02/2020 is that it's a palindrome in all four date notation formats. It doesn't matter if you use dd/mm/yyyy, mm/dd/yyyy, yyyy/dd/mm, or yyyy/mm/dd.

Next year, there'll be a palindrome date (12/02/2021) but it will indicate December 2nd in mm/dd/yyyy and February 12th in dd/mm/yyyy, and doesn't work in either year-first format.

The next "universal" palindrome date will be 03/03/3030. I don't plan on being around to see it.

02 Feb 20 - 12:32 PM (#4031787)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

"Bungalow" is a very good word. But I don't see it replacing "cabin" as a trope in American country and bluegrass music. "There's a bungalow in the pines..." doesn't quite have that bluegrass thang goin' on.

I suppose we could make a concerted effort to have The Beatles' "Bungalow Bill" elevated to bluegrass standard status, but we'd probably meet some resistance from the Bill Monroe worshiping hardcore purist crowd.

02 Feb 20 - 01:18 PM (#4031791)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

How would you title your discovery?
A Grand Panpalindrome, a millenial palindrome, a prizirp

02 Feb 20 - 05:36 PM (#4031834)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I think it could be rightfully considered A Sign From On High, as of two minutes after two a.m. it was 02/02/02/02/2020. There is Great Significance in this!

02 Feb 20 - 06:57 PM (#4031847)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Missed the Puppy Bowl.
One year they had a little Border Terrier in there.
He was so fast the camera couldn't track him --
nothing like the roly-poly yellow Lab pups.

02 Feb 20 - 08:49 PM (#4031859)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Where I worked in Ohio had the Chamber of Commerce in one town play touch football with the Chamber in a town a couple miles away. It was called "The Toilet Bowl" and the trophy was a gilded Toilet Bowl. The Chambers also sponsored the annual "Road Apple Run."

03 Feb 20 - 08:33 PM (#4032058)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM! Get back up there where you belong! Laying the gutter with booze on your breath is HARDLY apropos for a woman of such high position as you!

04 Feb 20 - 06:25 AM (#4032134)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mom regrets the passing of Diogenes found dead on Constitution Ave. this morning from malnutrition and exposure.

04 Feb 20 - 11:29 AM (#4032208)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Betting on Trump winning in 2020 is getting hot and heavy, so I shorted 200 billion in synthetic CDO's that favor Trump more than 2 to 1 in the futures market.

When he loses I do not expect to be paid my earnings of 15 trilion.

04 Feb 20 - 11:55 AM (#4032213)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In case you have forgotten, a CDO is a "bespoke tranche oportunity"

05 Feb 20 - 10:44 AM (#4032355)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The crime boss Donald 'the cheeto' Trump had a sit down with his capos last night.
It was anything but, with capos standing up and applauding every 7 seconds.
In the middle Rush 'the mouth' Limbaugh was given the made man ceremony.
Its business, not personal.

05 Feb 20 - 01:33 PM (#4032388)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

There are going to be thirteen full moons this year! I know this because some Internet news site's headline made a big deal out of it.

According to my calculations, based on an average lunar month length of roughly 29.53 days, there will be thirteen full moons in about one year out of three.

By that website's criteria, I suppose the fact that the last day of this year falls on a Thursday is an even bigger deal since it only happens one year out of seven.

05 Feb 20 - 02:11 PM (#4032400)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The BIGGESTdeal is that my birthday falls on a Tuesday in February this year. I mean, it's always in February, but this year it's on Tuesday. This has great occult and cult significance and marks a major shift in the world's destiny (just as my birth did). Things will immediately get better.

05 Feb 20 - 02:30 PM (#4032401)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Keb, we had the Puppy Bowl here at my house this year. It involves a game of skill, catching roasted unsalted peanuts tossed to each dog. They all excel at this sport.

05 Feb 20 - 03:34 PM (#4032416)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mercedes of 'As The World Turns' has been feeling out of sorts.

05 Feb 20 - 03:48 PM (#4032423)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

By the way, the real reason the Kansas City Chiefs won the Super Bowl is that I brought them good luck by attending one of their games (the only football game of any kind I've attended since graduating from high school). It happened thirty-five years ago. It just took a few years for the good luck to completely consolidate.

05 Feb 20 - 04:09 PM (#4032429)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mercedes may be pregnant by Aspen who is much older and is married to Porshe.

05 Feb 20 - 05:23 PM (#4032441)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I too went to a single NFL game but it was the Browns.

05 Feb 20 - 05:30 PM (#4032442)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

It wasn't Aspen. It was Volaré.

But it's an understandable error. You can only tell the difference in the closeups.

05 Feb 20 - 07:39 PM (#4032458)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

MOM,
how come we can see three days of music threads
but only a day or two of BS threads?

05 Feb 20 - 08:23 PM (#4032462)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Keb, it's just that no threads received their last posts on Feb. 3rd. They've all been refreshed today because they're just so damned interesting.

05 Feb 20 - 08:52 PM (#4032463)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Eww
Volare' has skin like rich corinthean leather.

05 Feb 20 - 11:34 PM (#4032466)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Was it the Volaré that had rich Corinthian leather? I only ask because I had an Aspen, which was essentially the same car but with a Dodge badge instead of Plymouth. It only had rich Corinthian vinyl.

06 Feb 20 - 12:23 AM (#4032467)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Corinthian leather
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Corinthian leather is a term coined by the advertising agency Bozell to describe the upholstery used in certain Chrysler luxury vehicles. The term first appeared in advertising in 1974. Although this is merely a marketing concept, it suggests that the term—not the product—was inspired from the more elaborate and impressive ancient Greek column of the Corinthian order.

While the term was first used during the marketing campaign for the 1974 Imperial LeBaron, it is usually associated with the marketing campaign beginning with the 1975 Cordoba and that campaign's celebrity spokesperson, Ricardo Montalbán, who described the thickly-cushioned luxury of seats "available even in fine (alternately, "soft" or "rich") Corinthian leather".

Much of the leather used in Chrysler vehicles during the era originated from a supplier located outside Newark, New Jersey.

Some sources say the term refers to the combination of leather seating surfaces and vinyl seat sides. However, most cars worldwide with "leather upholstery" have matching color vinyl seat bases and often the rear faces of the front seats, the head rests, and the door facings. The standard term in period car catalogs was "leather with vinyl", and sometimes "leather seat facings". When Montalbán was asked by David Letterman on Late Night with David Letterman what the term meant, the actor cheerfully admitted that the term meant nothing.

You mean rich Corinthian leather was a lie? A fabrication? A big bucket of marketing bullshit?

No wonder the subject seems so at home here on the MOAB.

06 Feb 20 - 07:09 AM (#4032506)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ricardo Montobahn sold the hell out of that vinyl.

Those flat six engines could go a million miles with 4 new transmissions.

Ricardo played a great villain on the original Star Trek

06 Feb 20 - 07:10 AM (#4032507)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

--KHAN--!

06 Feb 20 - 08:58 AM (#4032524)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You mean that Paul's Letters to the Corinthians were a marketing ploy?

06 Feb 20 - 09:53 AM (#4032531)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I suppose it had to be Corinthian leather. Doric or Ionic leather would be too plain and boring to use in a genuine luxury sedan.

06 Feb 20 - 12:10 PM (#4032563)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Funny; I was talking to a guy at Petsmart the other day about pickup trucks. He had an old one that turned out to be only 1993. I had a 1980 three-in-the-tree F100 I finally sold in about 1997. As he remarked - it had a great straight six - around which I had always thought there was enough room under the hood to store luggage (if it had been enclosed in a way to keep it in).

06 Feb 20 - 07:09 PM (#4032656)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I had two F-100 pickups, a '64 and a '77. Both had straight sixes, three-speed column shifters, and enough room under the hood to pitch a tent. But neither had rich Corinthian leather upholstery! In fact, I'm not sure the '64 had any upholstery at all. It had seats, but what was on top of those seats might well have been a dog's blanket that the dog threw out.

That truck had rather high ladder racks on it that once caused it to get stuck in a parking garage. I had to let about half the air out of the tires to get it unstuck.

06 Feb 20 - 07:30 PM (#4032658)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My current 6 cyl car goes 30 mph faster than a 2005 10 cyl viper engine 8.3 liter Dodge SRT 10 pick up, with or without a 200 lb load of manure wrapped in rich corinthean leather.

07 Feb 20 - 04:07 PM (#4032823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

With the large fleet of luxury cruise ships currently banned from docking at any port due to corona virus infected passengers, It has been suggested they should all tie up together and form an artificial floating island. Logisticaly it would simplify delivering supplies.
Burial at sea is in the testing phase to determine effects on sea life and mammals.
Euphemisticly we might call it Gilligans Island and plans to start filming a zany reality show about their trials, tribulations and novel inventions, are underway.

07 Feb 20 - 05:06 PM (#4032835)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Titles for the reality show are not yet greenlighted;

The mask and Glove boat, is waiting to take you away...

Take my hand Im a victim in paradise
the dining's nice, as they take me away...

Lost fantasy survivor Island

We should start writting folk songs now; May the Ship's cook,
be uninfected, in our galley, by and by ...

07 Feb 20 - 05:08 PM (#4032837)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Apocolypse Calypso?

07 Feb 20 - 05:40 PM (#4032842)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One of the writers was fired for telling the story from the virus' pov

07 Feb 20 - 06:39 PM (#4032853)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

What shall we do with coronavirus
What shall we do with coronavirus
What shall we do with coronavirus early in the morning?

Quarantine everyone 'til it's over
Quarantine everyone 'til it's over
Quarantine everyone 'til it's over early in the morning!

Or maybe

It's advertised in Boston, New York, and Buffalo
Three thousand hearty virus re-search-ers researching for to go
Singin' test vaccines in the mornin'
Test vaccines hi-ho!
Put away your lab glassware and stow, boys, stow!

07 Feb 20 - 07:17 PM (#4032860)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I don't have coronavirus and you'll never catch me on a cruise ship, but I'm willing to quarantine myself on a nice sportfisherman for a couple of weeks.

Of course, it is February so the fishing in the northern Gulf of Mexico is dead, meaning the quarantining would have to be done further south. Like Key West, Jamaica, Belize....

07 Feb 20 - 08:39 PM (#4032874)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I've figured out what's going on with Betelgeuse! It's Gluon!

Gluon is* on vacation in the Betelgeuse neighborhood and has met and is attempting to mate with a dogduck! A dogduck, of course, is the antiparticle to a duckdog. Their attempts at mating are releasing huge numbers of photons and anti-photons which are producing the variances in Betelgeuse's observed brightness. If their mating is successful, the resulting pressure wave from the matter/antimatter annihilation will result in the destruction of the entire constellation of Orion!

After a few million years, the remnants of Orion will coalesce into a new constellation known as Anas Canis (Duck Dog) in our universe and Canis Anas (Dog Duck) in whatever universe the dogduck came from.

* When we say "is", please bear in mind that Betelgeuse is some 700 light years from earth. Since Gluon transcends time and space he/she is there both right now and 700 years ago at the same time. Otherwise, we'd have to wait 700 years to see the resulting super-duper-nova. Gluon can get around the confines of relativity, but light cannot.

07 Feb 20 - 08:44 PM (#4032875)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Gilligans Island II will have thousands of Thurgoods, lots of Gingers and Marie Anns but relativly few Professsors.
Skipper: Brian Dennehy but then posthumously is replaced by the Rock
Gilligan: Chris Rock

Short term plots will involve extravagent 'Thurgood' requests, hijinx and escape attempts

The long term plot is uplifting in that after a year, people with natural immunity will be easily identified and used for vaccines.

08 Feb 20 - 09:08 AM (#4032945)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The ships have docked and the show is canceled {^I

08 Feb 20 - 10:07 AM (#4032961)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Florida!!! BEWARE, BEE-DUB!!!!

08 Feb 20 - 11:04 AM (#4032970)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Those monkeys are in northeast Florida, in the Jacksonville area, 350 miles east of here.

But, if they ever attempt to invade northwest Florida, there's already a plan in place for controlling them. Our congressional district's congressman, rabid Trumpist Matt Gaetz, will simply inform his supporters that the monkeys are Democrats, and they'll all be bush meat before they hit the Walton County line.

08 Feb 20 - 12:12 PM (#4032988)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

By the way, did you notice the totally non-proprietary I-don't-claim-the-son-of-a-bitch way in which I referred to Matt Gaetz as "our congressional district's congressman" instead of "our congressman" or, God forbid, "my congressman"?

08 Feb 20 - 02:27 PM (#4033017)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The owner's name is important in case you have to call the dogcatcher or someone. Otherwise, off to the pound he goes!

08 Feb 20 - 05:59 PM (#4033062)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I noticed you guys started talking about infectious bush meat prior to the announcment of the pandemic threat.
Is there some significance to this?

08 Feb 20 - 10:22 PM (#4033101)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Um, ah, nope. Nothing. Nada. Didn't mean a thing, not at all. Forget you ever saw it, okay?

09 Feb 20 - 09:40 AM (#4033177)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

JEEZ LOUISE ! Mudcat.org is already on the FBI's radar thanks to bb and friends informing them of a Cavanaugh threat mudcat post, now this?

What were you thinking, don't you know that the NSA already has a copy and the Smithsonian mirrors mudcat on their site??

ONE MUST NOT EAT
INFECTED MEAT

LETS HOPE THEY SEE THIS AND NOT THE OTHER STUFF

We should put Gulliani on this to cover the trail.

09 Feb 20 - 09:47 AM (#4033178)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I need a favor though...

09 Feb 20 - 11:35 AM (#4033196)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

A public service jingle to the tune of "The Colonel Bogey March"

Bush meat is really bad to eat.
Monkey or chimp or parakeet.
Jesus! It spreads diseases!
So take your bush meat,
And throw it away!

Maybe this show of public concern will get the Feebs off Mudcat's back re the Kavanaugh thing.

Or maybe not.

09 Feb 20 - 03:24 PM (#4033254)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I think were covered, they are too busy with Nazis and Putin and Trump.

hmm. Nazis and Putin and Trump sounds like 'Lions and Tigers and Bears

Oh My
'

10 Feb 20 - 01:58 PM (#4033423)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Hi, Mom, from your favorite kid. What's up?

10 Feb 20 - 05:00 PM (#4033468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I drove by a cow pasture today and there were at least two dozen black vultures hopping around on the ground near the fence. I slowed to see what was happening, figuring some critter had been hit by a car and made it under the fence and into the pasture before expiring. But no! The vultures were snacking on cow pies!

I suppose that those particular cow flops smelled like something buzzards like to eat. In other words, something dead and rotten.

I just thought Mom might like to know that bovine shit is so enticing that even buzzards partake of it upon occasion.

10 Feb 20 - 07:10 PM (#4033488)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rap you already have the lifetime achievment award for being mom's favorite so with all due respect you never need to feel insecure that a competition could ever possibly exist. It was good to see you both made it to the Oscars this year.

11 Feb 20 - 08:20 AM (#4033587)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL maybe you should have gotten out and picked some mushrooms too.
The ones that grow on cow flops are decent but not Amazonian grade.

11 Feb 20 - 08:26 AM (#4033588)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The vultures were probably feasting on undigested bits that that cows ate and passed. Other birds do that as well.

Yes, we made it to the "Academy Awards." Mom embarrassed herself (and me) first by the dress she wore (left over from her 1919 prom but "repurposed" with various slits added and "modesty panels" removed), drinking what was on other people's tables when the waiters refused to serve her more drinks, and kicking and screaming when security was forced to remove her. There were damages from the last and I do hope that the kicks and blows she gave to the security people don't cause lasting damage but I am afraid that she's in for a bit of a jail spell. Calling "GLUON! GLUON! HELP!" didn't help her, but the screams of "What's humping my leg?" only added to the confusion.

11 Feb 20 - 11:34 AM (#4033632)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I thought the quilted gown was gorgeous.

11 Feb 20 - 03:51 PM (#4033672)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I have a poop-eating puppy who positively bounds across the yard when she spots the old Lab taking a dump. And she's the cutest most charismatic DESTRUCTIVE dog I've ever owned. Who I rarely accept kisses from (only if she has been in the house for hours and had time for her breath to clear an a few drinks of water for dilution). To put the poop-eating vultures into perspective. It seems to be a critter Thing.

11 Feb 20 - 04:01 PM (#4033679)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Pro biotic poop. What a novel idea. At CVS I can buy pro biotic candy.

11 Feb 20 - 05:59 PM (#4033708)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Ever hear of a fecal transplant? Perhaps the pup is actually trying to right something that's wrong.

11 Feb 20 - 07:39 PM (#4033724)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Dog food companies go to great lengths to make their products sound appetizing to dog owners, as if a dog really cares whether its food tastes like filet mignon or plain old hamburger. Why not make dog food in flavors humans wouldn't care for but dogs really like? Like cat poop or deer guts.

11 Feb 20 - 10:35 PM (#4033736)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I don't buy dog food (except for Gluon). Perhaps I'm cheap, or perhaps I think that scraps are good enough. Or perhpars it's because I don't have pets.

12 Feb 20 - 09:17 PM (#4033925)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Gluon just ate my ENTIRE stock of Uranium 235! And half the Plutonium 239!

12 Feb 20 - 11:22 PM (#4033937)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Did GLUON do this in order to
glow in the dark?

13 Feb 20 - 06:52 AM (#4033965)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A least those are legal isotopes.

13 Feb 20 - 09:10 AM (#4034001)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Gluon doesn't actually use radioactive elements to glow in the dark. Oh, he/she glows all right, but it's just a side effect. He/she uses the Uranium to wake up in the morning, just like humans use coffee. And the Plutonium is to brush his/her teeth afterwards so he/she won't walk around with Uranium breath all day long.

13 Feb 20 - 12:52 PM (#4034036)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The syncopated
cosmic drumpht beat
in the universe
stretches and squeezes
our soul and being.
It takes silence
for overlords to rule.
They are full of stool
they've lost thier edge,
they've have lost their poison.
True to tell
But they still have that smell
Light years from hell

13 Feb 20 - 09:50 PM (#4034136)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [aex]
From: Rapparee

Gluon burps tiny bits of critical mass from the uranium 235 (s/he prefers it to U238, as it's a "lighter" isotope) and I won't tell you plutonium 239 does, except the result doesn't require a match to create "fire." I'll never forget the time Gluon ate 22 kgs. of plutonium and six kilograms of lithium VI deutride (⁶LiD) and torched a good sized part of the Texas panhandle.

13 Feb 20 - 10:14 PM (#4034138)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

She also gobbled the "nn" in the subject name of your last post. Hungry little critter!

14 Feb 20 - 11:45 AM (#4034208)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Have you ever spun Ununpentium mercury alloys in a magnetic torus?
SHEEit ya git gettyup fur next ta nuthin.
Whatever you use for gettyup only needs to move a massless field.
like lectricty

14 Feb 20 - 03:13 PM (#4034257)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The new Spielberg film Indiana Jones and the Sacred Mushroom will be released next year Unless the Goverment wins a lawsuit labeling it XXX.
Barr: "We are worried about the children".

14 Feb 20 - 06:03 PM (#4034295)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

So you've passed the Barr?

14 Feb 20 - 07:16 PM (#4034317)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Talking of Roseanne ...

I didn't watch the live "Conners" broadcast
that coincided with the state primary election.

14 Feb 20 - 07:48 PM (#4034327)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Speaking of fire ants,... here.

14 Feb 20 - 10:39 PM (#4034337)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I just finished watching a movie. It was advertised as a costume drama, but they lied. It had people in it too, not just costumes.

15 Feb 20 - 09:46 AM (#4034396)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

That's the problem, Bee-Dub: false advertising or what we called growing up back on the corn-swept prairies of Illinois, "lyin' through his false teeth." Why, I once looked at a house that was for sale and the ad said that it had "running water." When I went there the water came out of a faucet and didn't run anywhere! It didn't even have shoes! Or the bank that advertised "low interest loans" -- why tell customers that the bank has little interest in lending money when they probably know that already? "Truth in advertising" -- plain old phooey!

15 Feb 20 - 11:58 AM (#4034422)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Were you closer to the Ozarks or Indiana or stuck in the middle with Springfield?

15 Feb 20 - 12:40 PM (#4034430)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

This story on Marketplace was an eye-opener. In addition to "running water" the US seems to be lousy with loos.

15 Feb 20 - 01:36 PM (#4034442)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In the middle, on the banks of the Mississippi, the belly button on Illinois' pregnancy.

15 Feb 20 - 07:15 PM (#4034477)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ah the romance of river boats comes into focus.

15 Feb 20 - 10:32 PM (#4034499)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Twenty miles or so upriver from Hannibal, Mo. Yup, Sam Clemens' home town. Sam would bring a steamboat in and me and him would go drinkin'. After a while ol' Sam would excuse himself and go visit the "young ladies" upstairs. Then the Civil War started and Sam up and went West with his brother Orion -- plumb lit out fer Nevada Territory. Dunno what ever happened to him...probably fell down a mine shaft cuz he was always pretty clumsy. (I heard tell what some of the "young ladies" said about him but I ain't gonna repeat them salacious rumors.)

16 Feb 20 - 09:55 PM (#4034546)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yessiree! My home town is Quincy, Illinois! Founded in about 1832, it's got, well, not everything, but a lot of stuff. It's got a pubic library, a public library, a veterans' home (started in 1886), a riverfront, huntin', fishin', eddykashun institoots (even a kolidj, where I went), a lotsa nice houses that rich folks lived in back in the 19th Century or so. It's got TWO bridges for cars across the river (THE river, the Mississippi,the ONLY river worth talking about), one going to Missouri and one coming back. Heck, it's even got a damn dam! I was borned, raised, edykated, and even went ta war from there.

It's a good place to be from...FAR from.

17 Feb 20 - 08:17 AM (#4034588)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Danville, known for the now extinct Chuckles factory and losing all the birth records when the hospital burned down. AKA birthplace of Gene Hackman the actor.

17 Feb 20 - 08:27 AM (#4034591)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

btw 42 minor league baseball teams are scheduled to close their doors forever. So much for cultural fabric, now that we have WWWrestling and X fighting.

17 Feb 20 - 09:09 AM (#4034601)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There are Quincys in several states. They're all presumably named after John Quincy Adams. I guess whoever named them thought "Quincy" had more panache than "John" or "Adams".

We even have a Quincy in Florida. I've been through there a few times, but have never been struck by a compelling desire to stop.

It is not home to any bridges across the Mississippi River.

17 Feb 20 - 11:07 AM (#4034625)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

John Quincy Adams must have been pretty highly regarded during his lifetime in order to have all those towns named after him. I don't think he's on many historian's Top Ten Presidents list.

Or maybe the idea of having a president to name towns after was so new that folks jumped at the opportunity, even if he was a lousy president.

At least they didn't name anyplace really important after him, like Quincy, District of Columbia.

17 Feb 20 - 11:14 AM (#4034629)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Florida! Phooey! Quincy, Illinois has amongst its literary and thespian lights folks like Lucile Vasconcellos Langhanke (who acted under a fake name for some reason, that being Mary Astor) and my friend Roy Brocksmith. And other famous folks, like Paul Tibbets and Ike Samuels. Martin Jones Hawkins was one of those who was chosen for the Andrews Raid, a/k/a The Great Locomotive Chase; he overslept and missed it but was promoted the Sergeant and got the Medal of Honor anyway and he's buried in Quincy. Lincoln and Douglas had one of their debates there. As noted earlier, Sam Clemens visited there many times and sometimes stayed sober! St. Francis Solanus College, later St. Francis College and then Quincy Academy and then Quincy College and now Quincy University (I lived four blocks away) was the alma mater of not only ME but also the Venerable Augustus Tolton -- yes, me and Gus were good friends and often played billiards together after various classes. The town even had a lynching -- about a month after the Civil War ended a self-confessed Missouri bushwhacker named Tom Rose was hoisted by a bunch of recovering Union veterans from the hospitals.

Quincy, Indiana...Quincy, California...Quincy, Massachusetts...Quincy, Washington...Quincy, Florida...Quincy, Michigan -- all trying to horn in on the glory. (Quincy, Illinois, FWIW, is the county seat of Adams County.)

17 Feb 20 - 01:27 PM (#4034659)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Quincy, WA is on land above the Columbia River and the town grid is Letter streets one way and Number streets the other. The alphabet streets only go up to T. I looked it up, I have been past but not to it, but since Microsoft seems to have set up the largest data center in Quinch, someone travels there on occasion.

And there's this, from Wikipedia:

Although George is the closest town to the Gorge Amphitheatre, Quincy is the closest town that offers services such as motels and a full grocery store. Quincy sees an uptick in population during concerts. Quincy was previously home to Tacos mi Pueblo, one of the most sought-after Mexican restaurants in the area.

The semi-arid climate allows Quincy to go for weeks or months without rain during the summer. This makes nearby water recreation such as Crescent Bar a major draw. Quincy is the closest town with services to Crescent Bar.

Yup. You know we had to have a town of George, Washington. My parents spent some time in that part of the state, but escaped to the West side of the Cascades before I was even aware of what the East side was like. As Dad used to say, "miles and miles of miles and miles."

17 Feb 20 - 01:32 PM (#4034661)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Trump is 6 ft 3 shoes on
Bloomberg is 5 ft 8
John Quincy Adams was 5 ft 7
But Thomas Jefferson was 5 ft 4 (same as Vladamir)

17 Feb 20 - 04:35 PM (#4034678)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's a Bruce, Florida, though it's only designated as an unincorporated community, not a town.

There's a Margaret, Alabama with a population of 5,000. That's considered a genuine city by Alabama standards.

The less said about the possibility of there being a Mike, Idaho, the better.

17 Feb 20 - 08:40 PM (#4034705)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We shall refrain from commenting, Imperial Ignoramnus.

Emperor Rapparee, Imperious Rex ® His Mark

18 Feb 20 - 09:00 PM (#4034892)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In the entire WORLD there are exactly THREE places named Michael: one is in Illinois, one in Austria, and one in Mozambique. There is no place named "Mike" save for an airport in Hungary. However, the present President seems enamored of "La Wall."

18 Feb 20 - 09:19 PM (#4034894)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The "Wall" part of my surname (LaWall) is a Germanic spelling of the French "Valle", meaning valley. It has nothing to do with any wall.

My wife's name is Susan, which comes from the Persian word for lily. Therefore, her married name literally translates as Lily Of The Valley.

18 Feb 20 - 10:23 PM (#4034900)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm very, very glad to hear that. Please extend to your Lily Of The Valley my deepest sympathy and tell her that she has been nominated for the Medal of Honor.

19 Feb 20 - 08:21 AM (#4034957)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My last name means, in Modern Dutch, "Goalie." Given that my first name translates from Hebrew as "Who Is Like God" my name means "Goalie Who Is Like God" or "God-like Goalie." (This is true, by the way. I found out the goalie part from a Dutch fella in Carcassone awhile back. We were told as children my surname meant "Keeper of the Sacred Places" which, if you're into soccer, fits.)

19 Feb 20 - 03:07 PM (#4035062)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

I still don't know how one venerable Massachusetts coastal town
acquired the name of Braintree
(it was there maybe a century before the settlement called Quincy)

19 Feb 20 - 03:27 PM (#4035071)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I suppose having one's name translate as "Goalie" is preferable to having it mean "Wide Receiver".

19 Feb 20 - 05:41 PM (#4035094)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Most of the people who lived in Candor NY felt insulted and moved away. There is a book about it that Rap might know.
Chaste NY has not existed for 80 years now.
Its last resident was a Shaker.

19 Feb 20 - 08:31 PM (#4035116)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It has been illustrated many times that Trump's self-declared height is a special brand of BS. He's 6'1" at most, when you see him standing beside Obama and others all in the same type of shoes. Perhaps his waist is what is 75 inches.

MOM, I'm home with a new knee. It smarts a bit, what with the bone saws and gluing chunks of titanium to the exposed ends. I'm only checking in briefly before I put the leg squeezer things on to keep the blood circulating.

19 Feb 20 - 09:49 PM (#4035120)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I know about THAT, Stilly! Both knees have titanium in them. Just don't drive with those pills in ya!

20 Feb 20 - 12:49 PM (#4035224)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Don't drive! - I'm having to be careful when I talk or type. Anesthesia seems to hit short-term memory. No driving for a while yet. I filled the tank and parked it for what will probably be a few weeks.

20 Feb 20 - 12:56 PM (#4035227)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I have to be careful when I talk or type all the time without drugs.
Look forward to April.

20 Feb 20 - 03:36 PM (#4035261)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I got some new bedroom slippers. They have memory foam insoles.

I'm hoping the memory foam will help me remember to take the slippers off and put outdoor shoes on before going outside.

20 Feb 20 - 04:35 PM (#4035265)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

elo mom, I started the partisan prescription of 'Mr. Rodgers little helpers'. They cause folks to exude extreme kindness and have a blissful resignation to bad news without worry.
Side effects are ulcers and stomach cancer but
what do you expect from swallowing the bile of the world without some reaction? They are opiate FREE but contains 90% heroin.

The sister drug to Mr Rodgers helpers is for Republicans and is just plain anerobic steroids and amphtamines.

YAWN

21 Feb 20 - 03:47 PM (#4035417)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oxycontin, Oxycontin, I know you of old, you've robbed my poor pockets of silver and gold. Well, not exactly YOU, but the reasons I know you and your friend hydrocodone. And your other family members, like amoxycillin and Zofran and T-3.

22 Feb 20 - 03:19 PM (#4035523)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Right now it is my friend - I tried anti-inflammatory last night instead of oxy at bedtime (because of the swollen knee) and it was the worst most painful night's sleep in a long time. And it didn't help the swelling. I had to wait six hours before the next dose of painkiller. And I've slept much of the day. MOM hasn't had any problems with me, just nudges me occasionally and tells me to do my stretches.

22 Feb 20 - 09:43 PM (#4035567)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It ain't addictive if it helps and you WANT to stop taking it as soon as possible. Me, I don't like to take pills but I will if I need it. Later you might try T-3 or T-4 -- basically Tylenol with codeine, T-3 has less codeine that T-4.

23 Feb 20 - 08:21 PM (#4035755)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That's probably what we'll step down to next week. The bruises are spectacular and painful now. It's always something.

I really don't need the walker, what I use it for is a general sweeping motion in front of me to chase the dogs out from underfoot. "Plow the road" is the fighter jet term that I've seen in movies; this is the terrestrial version.

23 Feb 20 - 09:14 PM (#4035764)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A walker can help you get up from a chair or a couch (or a toilet).

24 Feb 20 - 01:13 AM (#4035772)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Have you given your walker a name? Mine is called Hoppy. I had to get him when I broke my ankle because I also broke my wrist and couldn't grip crutches. I had to Velcro my lower arm to Hoppy so I could hop around on one foot.

I understand that if I ever need his services again, it may involve shuffling instead of hopping, but that makes no difference. He'll always be Hoppy to me. I wouldn't want a walker called Shuffley anyway.

24 Feb 20 - 07:23 AM (#4035820)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Cassidy is a good name for a walker. (Hop Along)
This week's Curb your Enthusiasm featured the walker.
Similar to old locomotives a good cow catcher mini plow is a great walker idea.

My wife named her cane but I haven't even named my four seater Corvette. If I do, maybe 4-Vett could work. 40 years ago I had a Z 2+2

24 Feb 20 - 07:34 AM (#4035821)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Forty years ago I was living in Ohio, eight minutes from Kent State University and 36 miles from work. Ever drive 36 miles in an honest-to-God blizzard? I have, several times, and you don't sing "Jingle Bells" when the weather outside IS frightful.

24 Feb 20 - 09:31 AM (#4035849)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We sing Slip sliden away. When we would see several Volvos in a blizzard leave the road and disappear down an embankment, we slow down.

24 Feb 20 - 01:11 PM (#4035882)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Cars tend to follow the one in front of them in whiteouts and heavy fog; I had a friend who had a long driveway off of a state highway, and one evening he pulled in and had to tell all of the cars that followed him home to turn around and head back.

My driveway is too short for people to confuse it with a regular road but occasionally it could act as a boat launch when the creek rises.

24 Feb 20 - 01:21 PM (#4035887)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

LOL!

24 Feb 20 - 04:33 PM (#4035922)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Ditto Donuel!

24 Feb 20 - 10:25 PM (#4035963)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Funny. Many times I've seen boat ramps used as driveways.

25 Feb 20 - 05:20 PM (#4036164)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mardi Gras is goin strong.

25 Feb 20 - 08:50 PM (#4036183)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It ends tomorrow, when all Catholics go to church and have an "X" put on their foreheads with the ashes of last Palm Sunday's blessed palms. Then Lent starts and all good Catholics follow the fasting rules and the diet is as follows:

    No more than one meal per day is permitted.
    Flesh meat, eggs, butter, cheese, and milk are forbidden.
    The meal was not allowed until after sunset.
    Alcohol is forbidden.
    During Holy Week, the meal consists exclusively of bread, salt,    herbs, and water.

Of course, Laetare Sunday allows you to have cheese and a small glass of bad beer or wine to break the monotony of Lent. Vatican II lightened this up and you're now allowed one small glass of skim milk per day if you're over 87.

26 Feb 20 - 05:32 AM (#4036230)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

florida is back in the news for arresting, handcuffng, jailing, mug shots and fingerprinting a 6 year old for acting out.
Don't worry, she was not spanked.

27 Feb 20 - 01:00 PM (#4036415)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

brave New rules;
Citizens may not be told of a stock market crash.
NOW you may only say that the market has gone into correction.
OR
you may say how much the market is off its lows.

Mom has not crashed, she has gone into a correctional facility.

27 Feb 20 - 01:51 PM (#4036429)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Not a correctional facility, just an institution.

On the other hand, Mom is an institution.

Putting an institution in an institution is difficult, but not impossible. It's a bit like putting ten pounds of sugar in a five-pound bag. It's most easily achieved by curving space back on itself or similar judicious alteration of the space-time continuum.

Don't try this at home! Call a trained expert like Gluon.

***** DUCKDOG ENTERPRISES LLC *****

Space-time Continuum Alterations Made While You Wait

"We fold space like origami artists fold paper!"

(All Major Cards Accepted)

27 Feb 20 - 04:43 PM (#4036461)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I saw a good Florida Woman story the other day but lost track of it before getting back here. Chances are she'll do something stupid again and maybe I'll manage to post it that time.

27 Feb 20 - 05:08 PM (#4036466)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

How's the knee?

I like the folded space idea but the results are not intuitive.
There is not a more crowded space but rather a much bigger space.
This is very handy in apartment living or inside a tardis.

27 Feb 20 - 06:31 PM (#4036480)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

... regarding the Lenten fast:
what about herring?
Can one eat herring?

Because there is a wonderful Gaelic poem
by an Irish monk,
welcoming the herring at Lenten time.

27 Feb 20 - 06:37 PM (#4036484)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

No, one may not eat herring during Lent. Herring are not fish, they are foul.

27 Feb 20 - 08:03 PM (#4036492)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

creamed herring is kosher.

27 Feb 20 - 10:54 PM (#4036501)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Actually, I like canned herring snacks. I prefer them over sardines.

It's those over-salted dried kippered herring things that are inedible. I don't even think they're fish. When fishermen's work boots get so nasty and stinky that they can't stand to wear them anymore, they slice them into strips and sell them as kippered herring.

27 Feb 20 - 11:23 PM (#4036506)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

kippered is slang for skipper who is the one who decides when the boots are, on average, ripe enough.

28 Feb 20 - 12:53 PM (#4036609)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Pickled herring in wine sauce - a wonderful snack when eaten in moderation.

The knee is improving, according to the physical therapist, and the 2 months of workouts ahead of time give me a great edge on recovery as far as muscle tone. But as the one wearing the knee, I have to admit I'm tired of the compression sock things and the awkward moves that cause a flareup of bursitis in the hip.

The last couple of PT visits have concluded with me handing the spray bottle (water) to Katie and then lifting the cover from the dog door and letting the guys come in for a visit. The squirt bottle causes them to not be quite so pushy; for as little water as that thing puts out they still don't like it. And I've demonstrated my walker-dog-sweep move to keep them from jumping on me at the same time.

MOM's had more than her share of beer and wine since I'm forbidden from adding alcohol to the cocktail of stuff I'm on for the knee. She's going to have to walk off a little extra weight come spring. (Walking over to the Legion Hovel will give her some exercise, I guess.)

28 Feb 20 - 10:16 PM (#4036668)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM, I've been finding stuff out about the local Catholic churches! For instance, if you count all the exterior doors, including the double and triple ones, there are 52. There are also 5 garage doors and 1 garden gate. There are three outside entrances to the two churches and the school, these enter the basements. Gee, it's grand to have once been a genuine Physical Security Specialist! You get to do such exciting things.

I used to like pickled herring but apparently it does things to your breath. I tried not breathing after I enjoyed some but it caused comment.

On another note, I seem to have bone spurs in the bottom joint of my left thumb. They hurt, but I can't get drafted!

28 Feb 20 - 11:10 PM (#4036671)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A brainstorm (kopfstrum) by Steven Miller has inspired Trump to put a tariff on Chinese virus. He believes it will pay for the stock market
dip that was caused by Bernie worry.

I found out stuff about the Catholic bischops who tend the Vatican Bank. They filled buses with quarantined northern Italians to attend an ash wednesday gathering by the Pope. Due to a bad cold the Pope has suspended his duties.

29 Feb 20 - 01:15 PM (#4036741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom? Can you recommend a good, secure padlock that won't freeze up in temperatures well below 0F, is cut proof for a 36 inch bolt cutter, doesn't rust or corrode, which can be keyed alike or better yet have different keys for each lock and a master key, and which costs less than USD 10.00 each? And they have to fit a variety of hasps and chains!

Thank you, Mom.

29 Feb 20 - 01:25 PM (#4036743)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

How many people you are shackling?

29 Feb 20 - 02:02 PM (#4036751)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Maybe not people.
Maybe it's feral hogs ...

29 Feb 20 - 03:26 PM (#4036772)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom's recommendation is that Rap abandons his search for the ideal padlock and simply booby-traps whatever he was planning on putting locks on. The old string-tied-to-a-12 gauge's-trigger thing works dependably well and provides endless opportunities for imaginative variation involving creative use of pulleys, springs, weights, clamps, etc.

Or he could just spring for a pair of attack-trained Rottweilers.

29 Feb 20 - 05:39 PM (#4036791)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL you can put yourself in Rap's position of living out in the country when wandering bands of corona zombies are looking for shelter.
You can't kill them and you can't risk exposure so locking them up humanely, letting them eat a lovely last spread in an abandoned shed and allowing the cold to do the rest is the obvious solution.

If you have a better idea don't be selfish. I believe Rap is a genius.

01 Mar 20 - 09:33 AM (#4036887)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Left to my own ideas, I'd just use punji stakes -- heat treated for toughness and dipped in human poop. Maybe a barb on the insertion end. Or maybe one of those toe-popper land mines that just blow a leg off from the foot to the knee. But the people involved are wimps.

01 Mar 20 - 10:22 AM (#4036894)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Landmines did come to mind.

01 Mar 20 - 10:41 AM (#4036898)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

But locks are more humane and cheaper.

01 Mar 20 - 02:02 PM (#4036960)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Or Rap could just move to Florida and let the natural fauna take care of whatever miscreants he needs to lock his stuff away from. We have the best variety of deadly mammals, reptiles, fish, and invertebrates of anyplace in North America.

Better yet, move to Australia. They have so many deadly critters it makes Florida look like a petting zoo.

01 Mar 20 - 10:00 PM (#4037025)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, a pile of rattlesnakes makes folks out here think twice, assuming they're among the minority who CAN and/or DO think. I think a snake pit would be better than padlocks. I'd use Gluon but have no idea where/when/what that duckdog is.

02 Mar 20 - 12:11 AM (#4037031)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm tired of the medications I have to sort through so have taken myself off of the narcotic stuff and have better results with the OTC variety. I don't care what MOM said about getting "the good stuff," it's not good if it doesn't work. I'm still weeks away from being allowed in the Legion Hovel with the other meds they have me taking, but I'll toss the Tylenol by the time my liver is allowed to become reacquainted with alcohol.

02 Mar 20 - 08:06 AM (#4037078)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The narcotic stuff is for using when and while you need it. If there's some left lock it away, you may need some later. When it's over you can keep it locked away for the next time (and there will, unfortunately, be a next time) or drop it off at the local Walgreen's or cop shop for safe disposal. As my dear old seanmathair used to say, "Chomh luath agus in féidir."

02 Mar 20 - 08:16 AM (#4037080)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Most people do not know how toxic Tylenol is. Mixed with as littlr as a bottle of wine can kill a liver.

02 Mar 20 - 09:29 AM (#4037090)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Which one?

02 Mar 20 - 09:33 AM (#4037091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Scientists Who Should Know are saying that wiping your hands with a solution of about 70% alcohol is a good way to kill off that corona virus that's going around. I have a liter of 151 proof rum, and killing the virus that's gotten inside is a lot better than one the outside. So...I have to go disinfect and sanitize myself.

02 Mar 20 - 12:28 PM (#4037129)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I overstated the relief from the OTC stuff; after a few hours the muscle pain set in, and trying the muscle relaxants didn't offer any help for it so I'm back on Oxy. Yes, I'm not happy about taking acetaminophen, but it's the only one allowed right now.

You know that gimmick that always shows up in cop shows - they go to someone's house and ask to use the bathroom? I don't have a mirrored cabinet in my bathroom. Wouldn't do 'em a bit of good to go snooping in there.

02 Mar 20 - 01:06 PM (#4037136)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The most dangerous thing about prescription opioids isn't the risk of becoming addicted to the drugs themselves. It's that the constipation they cause can leave you addicted to laxatives, stool softeners, glycerin suppositories, and Fleet enemas.

02 Mar 20 - 02:27 PM (#4037140)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its good you checked your tolerence now. You will know what you will be able to do on OTC aspercreme lidocaine and the equivalence of 3 aspirin when the time comes. The advantage you gain may only be a few days of light withdrawl as opposed to a week. A heavy withdrawl is 18 days and the strongest withdrawl is 30 days or more.

Rap, achieving a 75.1 blood alcohol count is not recommended by the CDC but would be a world record beating Shane by 40 points on St. Patricks Day 1997.

Goodbye Rosie, Queen of Corona, seein me and Julio down by the school yard.

02 Mar 20 - 08:08 PM (#4037188)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The most significant thing ever said here was that it is a persistantly stubborn illusion that the past present and future are different from one another.
For this to be untrue the past would have to become unreal in the passing moment of now and the future would become no place to go since it does not exist yet.
So time must exist as a fundamental whole with the only difference being the amount we are allowed to know about past present and future.
Rap knows the past, I know more than usual about the future and BWL knows how crazy the present can be and SRS knows all 3.

02 Mar 20 - 10:41 PM (#4037205)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I believe six impossible things before breakfast, past, present, future, and other.

03 Mar 20 - 06:04 AM (#4037255)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Freudian slip or phase shift?- I said "untrue" instead of true.

When I can not tell the difference between the two it may be an early sign I am moving from limited future sight to the Trump rip in the fabric of time truth which is a phase shift black hole of the quantum "other".
In which case I should probably pull a Chris Matthews soon.

03 Mar 20 - 08:54 AM (#4037279)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Your typo is forgiven, Don. Anyway, there are many millions of Americans for whom the distinction between "true" and "untrue" is irrelevant or nonexistent.

And it can be like that for you too! Go ahead! Take the plunge! Drink the Kool-Aid!

The last few lines of 1984 updated:

...everything was all right, the struggle was finished. He had won the victory over himself. He loved ~~Big Brother~~ The Donald.

03 Mar 20 - 11:33 AM (#4037304)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My point precisely. There is no comprehensive cohesive or coherent plan for the markets or outbreak response except duck (dog) and cover.
Why believe in anything anymore?
So why believe nothing is the best policy?
When the policy is nothing something seems too radical.
The radical FED rate cut of 1/2 point to help corporations did nothing. The FED was never before used in a health emergency.

something - nothing , true - untrue. Its like we all decided there is no such thing as choice. Just grin and bear it. "The opposite President can't possibly cause too much harm". Waiting for an election also turned out to be a big no choice nothing.

The ghost of Claudius has awakened and let all the evil in the mud to hatch out.
No government, no law, no fundamentals, no alternatives, no Noah's ark.

On the other hand, Don't worry - be happy. Life is just a bowl of cherries. ya gotta spit the pits.

03 Mar 20 - 12:15 PM (#4037309)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Thank goodness those awful circulation cuffs are out of my life. The damn things literally wore the hair off of my lower calves (why bother to shave before the bandage comes off, though perhaps the bandage will rip off the hair growing under it?) MOM is trying to figure out a way to do some adaptive reuse, maybe set up a system of tubes and manual pumps that the cuffs could be attached to and squeeze and pump a steady supply of booze or maybe some annoyingly viscous substance like ketchup from one location to another.

03 Mar 20 - 10:13 PM (#4037382)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

But...but...those were your best friends! All of the ~~junk~~ medical equipment are your best friends! Compression socks! Crutches! Walkers! Toilet seat risers! How can you be so crass as to denigrate your best friends? Shocking, simply shocking!

All that stuff we have stored in The Box Room along with the Christmas decorations and tree. We expect to use the Christmas stuff again and hope never to use the other.

04 Mar 20 - 06:33 PM (#4037552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Knowing why and how they help can make them more reasonable.
Their purpose is to stop clot formation and travel in the body.
"i'm avoiding a stroke" is a better thought than "these god damn things are chaffing".

The only thing I notice from my surgury today is the pressure bandage. That sucker is tight! No thick tissue except bone were cut.

To have a more open mind, I had a reversable timpantion done by installing a plastic zipper over the vibe vent on my right occipital lobe. A lid over the timpanation/zipper is sewn in the back of several ball caps. If I ever want to close off my mind completely I just wear the thickest lid in the Red cap. The blue cap lets in 1/2 the vibes and the white cap is just a hat.

To pick up vibes from the overlords I take off my hat unzip the vibe vent and aim my timpanation at Betelgeuse.

04 Mar 20 - 07:11 PM (#4037561)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

When my wife had her head injury I offered to bring my brace and bits, but the surgeon talked me out of it.

04 Mar 20 - 07:22 PM (#4037563)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Contacting Betelgeuse makes me look like some kind of a god damn religious nut as if I'm bowing down to the gods. Jeesh, what's a good athiest to do?

Vibe prisms do work but are still too bulky/expensive to wear comfortably.

btw
The surgical intake male nurse was a real Mench in our free ranging conversation that went from; the best jokes to family survival experiences in Hitler Death camps, from XRAY Ted jokes to holocaust PTSD. At least it lowered my blood pressure by 40 points

04 Mar 20 - 09:20 PM (#4037572)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: GUEST, The Galactic Overlord

You acephalic invertebrate! Your thoughts are less than those of Nicdomian slime worms! Those witless fungi of Betelgeuse are rulers of only the bottom most mud of naphtha oceans, incapable of supporting life or thought! And YOU listen to them! Tune your thoughts instead to ME and you will be rewarded with treasure far, far beyond your feeble imagination. And note well: As you are inexorably bound by the chains of the speed of light in your time frame I am destroying Betelgeuse in the future, in actually it has already been done. Accept me as your destiny, for in truth I am such.

05 Mar 20 - 02:38 AM (#4037586)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Freckles’ Advice

Though Freckles is an angel now, he ain't forgot his friends.
He drops to earth and hangs around behind the buckin' pens.
He pulls a rope or just makes sure a rider gets bucked free.
So I took it as an honor, the day he spoke to me...

"I saw you ride your bull today. You sure did yourself proud.
You had him by the short hairs, I could feel it in the crowd!"
"I really should be thankful that I even stayed aboard.
You could'a done it better, Freckles...I'm lucky that I scored!"

"Hey don't be puttin' yourself down! You know you did okay.
The time will come when you look back and hunger for today
When everything was workin' right and judges liked your style,
Your joints were smooth, your belly flat and girls liked your smile.

"Cause in between the best you rode and the last one that you'll try
You'll face your own mortality and look it in the eye.
There ain't no shame admittin' you ain't what you used to be,
The shame is blamin' Lady Luck when Father Time's the key!

So if they know you came to ride and always did your best
Then hang your ol' spurs up with pride, 'cause that's the acid test
And, say some gunsel offers you a 'Geritol on Ice,'
Just grin 'im down, 'cause you don't have to ride Tornado twice!"

©Baxter Black

05 Mar 20 - 05:30 AM (#4037617)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Dear Galactic Overlord, Your representative on Earth has caused me to look elsewhere for guiandance. Even Sirius B.

We are beyond the acceptance of mere amino acids prevalent in the universe, we now have proof of ubiquitous proteins
So we now can prove you are not the only game in town anymore fella.

I welcome all Heavy hydrogen beings to the pantheon of BS ( Beings in Space )

05 Mar 20 - 09:51 AM (#4037671)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I knew a teen who was a pro. Ah, the memories!

05 Mar 20 - 12:04 PM (#4037703)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Epstein knew a teen
who was a real pro
they used to make love
rocking to and fro
Now it's not humorous
since he was in jail
its become posthumous
for his breathing has failed

05 Mar 20 - 12:06 PM (#4037705)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I can hear Baxter's voice when reading that poem (but I can't find him reciting it on YouTube. This however, gives you a feel for his spoken word). But my hoe was all covered with gore . . .

05 Mar 20 - 12:14 PM (#4037710)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The acid test is putting nitric acid on a golden object.
If it turns green, its not gold.

05 Mar 20 - 12:41 PM (#4037719)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

And here I thought the acid test was testing your ability to do normal shit like wash your hair while tripping on LSD.

05 Mar 20 - 03:02 PM (#4037746)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

HEXIQUARK! HEXIQUARK! HEXIQUARK! HEXIQUARK! HEXIQUARK! HEXIQUARK!

The d-star Hexiquark in configurations of six make up the atoms of Dark Matter.

They are free to configure differently than regular quarks.
As a Bose Einstien Condensate at the lowest possible temperature they clump together and concentrate their gravity.

They will not interact with light or matter.

I always refferred to these quarks as th left over by product of the annihilation of the most vast amount of matter and anti matter.

what is a d-star hexiquark?

05 Mar 20 - 03:37 PM (#4037754)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL the problem with LSD is that it quantizes time into tiny segments so that a sweeping motion is broken up into many stop and go moments.
If you are the grand master of a symphony orchestra on acid, you just can't see the exact downbeat. What some people call 'trails' are anything but. One can even see the individual flickerings of a flouresent bulb. Time gets too tiny to use for our macro world.
No such problems with organic mushrooms.

05 Mar 20 - 03:46 PM (#4037756)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Nothing so robust as LSD, I'm feeling light-headed from the step-down Rx for my knee. But I am safely seated and listening to YouTube's series of Theodore Bikel songs that came up after a Richard Dyer-Bennett song. #DownTheRabbittHole

MOM loves singing along to Dyer-Bennett's Vicar of Bray.

05 Mar 20 - 03:49 PM (#4037757)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are some who use it as an advantage to micro measure the throwing of a baseball in order to pitch a perfect game.

SRS You had someone go to town with a hammer chistle and saw on your knee. It takes a while.

05 Mar 20 - 03:58 PM (#4037759)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Back to the hexiquark. You won't find much dark matter around here simply because of the heat from our sun. Dark matter lives in the distant suburbs of our galaxy where it is cool.

05 Mar 20 - 04:09 PM (#4037764)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Dark matter has a more "frictionless" momentum than visible matter because of its lack of interaction.
I should sell dark matter oil.

05 Mar 20 - 11:25 PM (#4037804)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I am, like, cool! I am Dark Matter!

06 Mar 20 - 09:28 AM (#4037879)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Like minus 260 Kelvin cool daddyooh

06 Mar 20 - 09:53 AM (#4037888)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm like -infinity K° cool, man!!!!

06 Mar 20 - 10:06 AM (#4037891)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I am not Dark Matter. I am Waste Matter. Or maybe Doesn't Matter.

06 Mar 20 - 11:36 AM (#4037909)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Learning to walk upright, not swaying, extending the leg completely each time. I was able to walk in any ol' dopey way before, now I need to watch my posture, change weight from one side to the other, and unlearn bad habits from when the knee was full of bone spurs.

It seems the best way to see if I'm ready to drive is to take a short run. We discussed a drive to city hall, six blocks from here. The challenge is to see if anyone wants to be in the passenger seat with me. MOM will do it, but she doesn't drive, so if we had to stop and change places we'd end up walking back to the house instead. The road follows the creek, and its a good thing there aren't any gators in it.

06 Mar 20 - 12:21 PM (#4037921)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

You rock, o Rapturous Imperious Rex Rapparee.

06 Mar 20 - 12:32 PM (#4037927)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

He's not emperor over here! There's a time/space split between MOAB and Emperor.

06 Mar 20 - 01:10 PM (#4037931)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Well, Imperious Rex is MY emperor,
and you can kick me off MOAB for saying so. So there.

06 Mar 20 - 01:30 PM (#4037933)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Standing, sitting, walking, driving, laying down all great.
But transitionng from any of these states to another feels like a special slo mo nazi torture. Its time to take my first shower since incision time 2020.

06 Mar 20 - 05:04 PM (#4037979)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rocking Rapturous RaP SEX? I'll pass

07 Mar 20 - 07:58 AM (#4038059)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I shall never rob keberoxu on the King's Highway!

07 Mar 20 - 08:28 AM (#4038067)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Oh chivilarous cavalier, thou are more honourable than King Donald.

07 Mar 20 - 02:17 PM (#4038128)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I had the chance to take his purse, but he kept hitting me with it. Then the Secret Service got involved and stole away my rapier and filled my charges up with water and a prisoner I was taken, but I escaped and found my brother (the one that was in the Army) and we went robbing on the far-famed Illinois mountains.

07 Mar 20 - 03:20 PM (#4038146)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ha ha the 1,000 ft mountains in Illinois are named after famous mounds. The red dirt of Illinois is not even great for corn. Iron rich but calcium poor makes it bad for crops, dogs and baby teeth.

07 Mar 20 - 09:23 PM (#4038203)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I wore myself out walking around the grocery store today for a half-hour on level ground, though I wore out my original knee climbing many hours and many days and years with many pounds in a backpack on real mountains in the Pacific NW.

There's a sweet little puppy asleep in the dog bed beside my desk in my office. One of the three is always asleep in it when I'm in here. None of us are climbing anything for a while, though she'd like to climb up in my lap and have her tummy rubbed.

07 Mar 20 - 09:29 PM (#4038205)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

So now we have have a handle on the great mystery of dark matter, and clues as to why the universe is accelerating with more black holes in turn generating space from matter and time in greater amounts by distributing space by way of Eienstien-Rosen bridges. (dubious)

So what is the next great mystery to solve by ancient mudcat theorists? Please don't say strings, they are soo fussy & finicky and lways need retuning..

08 Mar 20 - 08:10 AM (#4038261)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I thought so. SRS is one of those forces of nature beings.

08 Mar 20 - 09:54 AM (#4038285)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

This guy is a force of science (Neil deGrasse Tyson) and he talks about that dark matter in this engaging and informative interview with Stephen Colbert (who is no slouch himself).

08 Mar 20 - 11:42 AM (#4038307)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Picks. No one knows where they go, except that they disappear when you need them. One theory is that they are self-contained and self-creating mini-micro black holes which are sometimes tangible. Then, when most needed, they "eat themselves" (to use the Blackholers' technical term) and vanish. They may or may not reappear later when their loss is most lamented and likely to cause to most anguish and cursing. The total, world-wide, extinction and disappearance of lute picks is a mystery to luters and which scientists have been unable to solve.

08 Mar 20 - 12:22 PM (#4038314)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Neil is a good frontman, moneyman, historical constructionist and cruise activity captain that gets things done. Meanwhile the far thinking real captain is in the bridge with navigators. As far as Astrophysicists go, it is good to have a Carl Sagan type on hand.
Charisma can't be bought. In that realm, Neil beats Carl.

My favorite is gone already, Richard Feynman who taught at Cornel with Carl.

Picks can be bought

I use picks so rarely since I have a natural little finger nail I use as a pick. My bain are socks that are supposed to match.

08 Mar 20 - 01:26 PM (#4038331)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Come to think of it I bet charisma can be bought, acquired, learned, practiced and groomed.

08 Mar 20 - 11:07 PM (#4038420)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm talking about PICKS, not some wimpy little plastic thing! Not tooth, not dental, not top-40, but PICKS!!

09 Mar 20 - 07:12 AM (#4038468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thats different. Picks have been used for more tunnels, brain surgury and grave digging than any other device.

The smart money however is going to use cheap oil for quick mass cremations instead of diggng graves. Picks and shovels are buggy whip technology afterall.

I'm glad they decided to not torpedo cruise ships off our shores.
Instead keeping them circling until they go silent is more humane and may greeenlight the Gilligan's cruise ship reality show series.

09 Mar 20 - 09:33 AM (#4038498)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Is it true that Bee-dubya-ell has been trying to get to his private Hawiian Island only to discover someone stole his private Cessna Citation X? Did he really take a cruise ship instead?

09 Mar 20 - 09:48 AM (#4038502)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Not a cruise ship, a cruiser. Bee-Dub ain't one to let a li'l ol' virus git him! Nosir! Not him!

09 Mar 20 - 01:46 PM (#4038569)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Very stealthy.

09 Mar 20 - 11:12 PM (#4038681)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

That's our Bee-Dub: stealthy as they come. Under, over, around, and through the radar.

10 Mar 20 - 07:07 AM (#4038742)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Under the BS impression that an out patient procedure with a local injection or two would be a breeze so I opted for no opiods.
SON OF A BITCH

I was knocked out carved up and left for the buzzards. I deserve to not complain but if I had any druthers-I would definATy have taken the Oids. The 'lucky' few had morphine in the Civil War, and I mean few.

10 Mar 20 - 10:45 AM (#4038788)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'll be the first to tell you that when you need them, take them. Three weeks out and I'm slowly weaning - still. I went back to a full day of tramodol as a baseline for generally feeling okay, and now I'm spacing out the doses.

Hey, MOM decided it was time to put some money in her IRA since it had lost 10% of it's value in the last few days. The shares cost less now and will show up as more once this wretched virus passes.

MOM also wonders about all of those people who can't "call it in" from home for their work. She has a sanitation station down at the curb with soap, running water, paper towels, and Vodka for anyone passing by who needs to clean up. She's not sure why the Vodka is such a big deal, and decided not to mix it into the soap, just let people decant it into little dinky mouthwash-sized cups. There has been a line forming out there all morning.

10 Mar 20 - 02:36 PM (#4038858)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm done with optimism.

10 Mar 20 - 03:31 PM (#4038869)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I finally broke down and joined Facebook. As a result, I have become Facebook friends with several of my old hippie friends. I had not had any contact with them for almost forty years and I'm totally gobsmacked by how conservative most of them have become.

It's like, "Last time I saw you, we were doin' drugs and bitchin' about Ronald Reagan gettin' elected president. And now you're posting photos of the "Re-Elect Donald Trump" signs in your yard? Did you take too many drugs or not enough?"

10 Mar 20 - 03:35 PM (#4038874)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its not the quantity of drugs that destroys neurons, its alcohol.

10 Mar 20 - 03:50 PM (#4038879)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You'd better learn quickly how to set it so only friends see your stuff, so your friends aren't in view to outsiders, share photos only with friends, etc. (You have kids, right? They can show you.) There's a page called "Facebook Purity" that Facebook won't let anyone mention by name because it's full of tips to turn off Facebook ads and awful features. Look up "Fluffbusting Purity" instead and add it to your browser, then open it up and select the things you don't want to see. There's a lot to work with, it'll take several tries. I, for example, want to see posts in the order the arrive, not in the order Facebook wants to promote them. I detest all of their games and you'll give away your privacy if you take any of those awful quizzes.

Now aren't you glad you joined? I joined so long ago that only people on universities could join. And I was a member so long ago that when they started letting people use their own names I got mine for my account. Now people have to add funny spellings or numbers to come close to their own names. #EarlyAdopter. You'll find me at www dot facebook dot com /maggie.dwyer

Last week I talked my younger sister through how to use some of the video calls. Facebook's Messenger is a handy tool; I have the app installed on my phone (but I'm not letting it take over my SMS service!) and use it for video chats with my kids. No phone bills when my daughter spent a year in Japan, just Messenger chats. Now MOM, she gets a little adventurous about who she chats with, especially the ones she heard about through friends at the Legion Hovel. I've had to turn off the WiFi in the house a few times to get them to knock off the loud conversations in the middle of the night.

10 Mar 20 - 11:48 PM (#4038953)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yeah, and some of the Hovelites are getting tired of people like Sex Mind Johnny and Creative Charley and Mom have those conversations by phone or in person. All that talk about velvet-lined handcuffs, "bouncy seats," some sort of balls, water sports, and other things make even the most hardened reprobate and reprobabe at the Hovel uncomfortable. The discussion of the uses of itching powder may have been the worst.

11 Mar 20 - 08:30 AM (#4038999)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Since the universe is expanding it helps make more room on Facebook and traffic on the roads.

11 Mar 20 - 10:37 PM (#4039136)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's also nice for those with flatulence.

12 Mar 20 - 06:18 AM (#4039147)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

CHEAP FARES TO UK
wOO WHO - The only destination left for overseas flights is London.
While you guYs are in a TIME OUT my tour of a traffic free UK in spring sounds better than another Disney vacay .

13 Mar 20 - 05:21 PM (#4039381)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In reality the fares were doubled, crap. Trying to board was further complicated by some chedder I had wrapped in tin foil when it was detected as a C-4 bomb, so I missed the flight. Worst of all they kept my cheese.

13 Mar 20 - 10:41 PM (#4039422)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Cheese caused flatulence. Flatulence is ill regarded on airplanes. Other passengers may act to stop it. You do not want them to do so.

14 Mar 20 - 07:12 AM (#4039459)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

As whimsey turns to pathos worldwide and we each begin to live our 'On the Beach' scenarios in our dreams inside our hibernation pods, the dangers of of a build up of hydrogen sulffide gases is nothing to kid about.

From the balconies in the cities, live music and singing can be heard like birds broadcasting our indominable spirit. From the peacful country ranch to unseen forests where the silent tree falls, the world is taking a breather. From the sacred places to the profane, life is slowing down to challenge the RNA dangers.

If it takes a pandemic to overcome the age of idiocy, so be it; we will emerge a better species.

With respect to Rapaire, the earliest contributor standing, the last words shouuld belong to him.

14 Mar 20 - 08:45 AM (#4039472)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Where is the hydrogen sulfide coming from? Volcanic vents? The White House? The odor of rotten eggs comes from DC and every legislature in the country -- and from some overseas. Carbon monoxide, on the other hand and something to which I am very sensitive, is odorless, tasteless, colorless, and pervasive. And, of course, we exhale carbon dioxide. But I forgo any more chemistry lessons for today.

15 Mar 20 - 09:48 AM (#4039657)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

They took your CHEESE?! Bastards!

15 Mar 20 - 10:51 AM (#4039669)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Nearly 2'5 pounds of cheese! Cheese misidentification by TSA

15 Mar 20 - 10:59 AM (#4039671)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've heard millions would rather die than being locked in at home with their family

15 Mar 20 - 11:47 AM (#4039685)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Moth his floor fromer of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Deep in the foul fetid bowels of Langely an anlyst decided to self isolate at work. Water on the floor was from a restroom accident from an upper floor. Escaped Crickets had colonized the hallway from an abanddoned lab. Craig Kravitski dozed despite his eyes slowly opening and gazing at his computer screen showing virtually no reported cases of virus in Russia while the rest of the globe glowed red.

As it all became clear to Craig his eyes widened and he snapped wide awake. Perhaps Russia is not typically lying but they have an acquired immunity to Covid 19. What product would nearly all Russians consume with a vaccine added over time? VODKA was his first thought. While it might kill the virus, a vaccine would be preserved.

Craig uttered the obvious out loud "They finally weaponized the common cold". How could he prove it? He first looked into any Government interference in the production and export of Vodka.
There it was; all domestic vodka was ordered sent to tax facilities in Klimsk and Adropovd while exports went straight to port since March of 2019. Could there be level 4 vaccine production labs in the same vacinity, before he had the answer he was off like a shot toconfront his boss with this new analysis when he slipped on the wet floor and broke his neck.

15 Mar 20 - 12:37 PM (#4039701)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

Has it ever occurred to you that "dry runs" is an oxymoron?

15 Mar 20 - 01:14 PM (#4039709)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

All of those Italians on their balconies singing together are inspiring; too bad our neighborhood is too spread out for that to work, and who knows what songs these neighbors know? Probably country or churchy stuff. When we were kids we would play in the back yard and sing songs at the top of our lungs - usually the songs our parents told us weren't polite and we shouldn't sing in public.

𝅘𝅥 My sweetheart's a mule in the mine,
I drive her without any lines,
On the bumper I sit,
And tobacco I spit,
All over my sweetheart's behind. 𝅘𝅥𝅘𝅥𝅘𝅥

15 Mar 20 - 05:22 PM (#4039756)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I know that one. I also know the less-polite version of "Erie Canal" and "The Old Chisholm Trail" and several others. I ain't a-gonna post 'em, you'll have to larn 'em yerself.

16 Mar 20 - 12:17 AM (#4039825)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

They're probably already in the DT.

17 Mar 20 - 09:16 AM (#4040153)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM's got the Corona! And the Budweiser! And the Molsons. And the Coors. And the Moose Drool. And the Polygamy Porter. And the Guinness. And the Smithwicks. And the Alaskan Amber. And the Labatts. And the Moosehead. And the Murphys. And the Pabst. And the Millers. But she does NOT have, nor will she touch even an empty container of, "light" or "lite" beers. She once said to me, "If I wanted to drink from the toilet I'd be a dog."

17 Mar 20 - 09:53 AM (#4040166)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I done writ a song!

If you go down to the store today you're in for a big surprise!
If you go down to the store today you'll never believe your eyes!
There'll be nothing there for you to buy,
No toilet paper or other supplies,
For today's the day the hoarders have a picnic!

See them grab the cleaning supplies
As they carry off soup and soap like it was free today!
(TBC)

17 Mar 20 - 11:10 AM (#4040193)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You are well prepared. Of course no self respecting corona virus is going to go to Idaho, check the maps. Perhaps we should all go to Pocotello.

Were all goin to Pocotello
Where the flowers bloom in June
Were all goin to Pocotello
Sick or not we'll all see you soon

17 Mar 20 - 12:10 PM (#4040222)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Too bad Coronavirus can't read. There are signs as you cross the border into the state that say "Don't Mess With Texas."

MOM has thrown stuff at the television for the last two days in a row. That turd Trump pontificates on the crowded stage trying to take credit for the work that states have forced him to take. She wants to remind all of us that that kind of BS is toxic and in no way related the benevolent fertilizer that the Mudcat thread(s) have produced. There is a Superfund in place for the current administration's discharge and offal.

17 Mar 20 - 01:52 PM (#4040270)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For me in the last 2 days trump has never been more grounded.(for him)
I even accept that the WHO story about test kit refusal was bogus.
He did fire the 3 administrator group for pandemic control in 2018.
I may even v... NAH! I'm still sane.

17 Mar 20 - 02:43 PM (#4040298)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Tonight at 8 PM AST on FB.

https://www.facebook.com/events/1962791890520173/

17 Mar 20 - 03:03 PM (#4040310)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's offal to say, but for offal you first need guts.

17 Mar 20 - 04:47 PM (#4040330)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Living without intestines has and is being done but the IV of fluids and ATP is an awful inconvenience.

17 Mar 20 - 06:18 PM (#4040346)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mom wipes the weary brow of grandpa as the TV drones on.

17 Mar 20 - 07:48 PM (#4040362)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Lots of broadcasts are looking different as cameras are set up in open places and web cams and skype and such are being used more. I'll follow the dot later (I've just set up MSNBC on my newly acquired Sling TV (Blue) account so I can see the graphs they use on Rachel, et al.

Who knew that Yang's plan to give $1000 to everyone was going to happen - and now.

17 Mar 20 - 09:02 PM (#4040380)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its not enough but it is a start.
If you look carefully Mudcat did 'predict' the pandemic with the contagion discussion of bush meat as China was just undergoing an outbreak.

17 Mar 20 - 11:18 PM (#4040396)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Just back from a foursome, gathered to celebrate Padraig of Eire. Lovely potato soup, delicious corned beef cooked just right. Redbreast Irish whisky, Murphy's stout, and some of that creme/whisky mix. We were talking over Skype, of course, and we all used different exits.

17 Mar 20 - 11:19 PM (#4040398)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Lá Fhéile Pádraig sona duit!

18 Mar 20 - 07:37 AM (#4040448)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Fair morrow, good Mother! I'm off to Smith's by 0700 MDT as they allow old people in first for their opening hour. I shall buy chicken soup, toilet paper, disinfecting wipes, disinfectant and other things in short supply by the case! I shall be a hoarder, a Care-Not-For-Others, yea, the Epitome of Randism! And I shall pick up for you a case of Thunderbird (your favorite wine) and shan't give it to you!

I have learned, Mom.

And if I can't do any of the above, I'll try to get some cough drops.

18 Mar 20 - 11:47 AM (#4040494)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Whole Foods (aka Whole Paycheck) has an hour from 7 to 8am for seniors. Now if Kroger would get on the ball . . .

18 Mar 20 - 05:55 PM (#4040562)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Smith's is owned by Kroger; their senior times are M, W, and F, 7-8 a.m. Albertson's who is also Safeway are 7-9, Tu and Th. Nel's Bi-Lo here is everyday, 8-9. Smith's had it that one must leave for another to go in after the first few customers. That's okay, I got my toilet paper.

I did, too. With everyone else seeming to buy two packs of 24 rolls each I thought it was a requirement so I bought a six-pack because it was the smallest size available. ONE. I did get three bags of cough drops, which were non-existent elsewhere, and left several more on the rack.

18 Mar 20 - 06:23 PM (#4040570)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

When I was in the supermarket the other day, stock clerks were "stocking" the canned vegetable section by just opening cases and putting them on the shelf with no regard of the items' usual shelf locations.

"Just throw 'em anywhere on this big old empty shelf and they'll be gone in under a minute anyway. Even if it's something we don't usually sell a case of a week. Why waste time walking down the aisle to put them where they belong?"

18 Mar 20 - 08:16 PM (#4040588)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Saw a feller walkin' outa the grocery store yestiddy who musta had about a hunnert cans of beans in his cart. An' three er four headsa cabbage. Might be why the hazmat was called out taday.

19 Mar 20 - 07:16 AM (#4040659)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The first loll - little out loud laugh of the day

MOM is surprised how suddenly Americans have all become Russians in life style, economy and shopping. She took a stroll outside MOAB and found that Brits congregate in the New rules thread where they discuss tea, crumpets and toilet paper but they too are becoming Russian with eyes closed.

Entrepaneurs are looking to Italy for the new demand for new businesses like exporting bodies to massive cremtorium facilities since towns are overwhelmed. So far only Jared Kushner has begun our first Bodies R' Us business.

Trump to America: YOU'RE ALL FIRED!

19 Mar 20 - 08:40 AM (#4040675)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

OMG MOM they shut down all the casinos except the biggest one, Wall Street. Sure they hit the pause button 4 times but billionaires are still (Micheal) Milkin the short sell to make $

You know it is the one casino industry we don't need to breathe, eat or sleep.

19 Mar 20 - 07:02 PM (#4040789)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I went out again today, over to the Legion Hovel for morning coffee with some of "the boys." Nothing much new there, just a lot of coughing and some of the guys looking feverish and tired. But the corpse-laden tumbrils are rolling through the streets, and another plague pit is being dug over where the third green of the golf course out back used to be -- fortunately we won't be in the direct line of the wind! The first pit was downhill, where the second green used to be, but it's all filled in now. Over on the fifth fairway they're piling up wood for a pyre on Saturday evening.

19 Mar 20 - 10:30 PM (#4040806)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I too was wondering how to repurpose Trump golf courses.
All I had was fairway field hospital tents, greens for admin and sand traps for you know what.

20 Mar 20 - 11:53 AM (#4040937)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The best way to keep a resolution all your life is to make them right before you die, so I resolve;
To not answer any more rhetorical questions like a wise ass.
To not covid my neighbor's goods
To not add Bourbon to my True Blood IV cocktail
To not smoke LSD
To not not question the sanity of the C and Chief
To not enforce the law of gravity.

20 Mar 20 - 01:07 PM (#4040949)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Dearest Mom:

Mrs. Google keeps talking about plumping dried fruit with boiling water. I have almost 1/3-withered cherries. Can I just soak them in water?... how long?

Soaking and sulking in Moncton

20 Mar 20 - 04:56 PM (#4040998)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You have one-third of a withered cherry? Do you need food? We can help.

20 Mar 20 - 05:47 PM (#4041011)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

What will you do with them once they're plump?

20 Mar 20 - 09:03 PM (#4041049)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There may be some information in the chronicles and diaries of Baron von Frankenstein regarding the reanimation of fruits.

21 Mar 20 - 07:52 AM (#4041112)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Soaking cherries in water might plump them up, but it's not going to rejuvenate them in any other way. You'd probably wind up with a bunch of very plump rotten cherries.

21 Mar 20 - 08:15 AM (#4041115)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I have had a bag of dried tart cheeries by my chair for a month. A little goes a long way. The pecans are gone but lots of other nuts remain. Other long term foods are canned goods and apple juice.
The only thing likely to get plump is me.

21 Mar 20 - 02:47 PM (#4041178)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Soak the cherries in brandy.

22 Mar 20 - 07:25 PM (#4041423)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Shocking! Simply shocking that Mom would be left to her own devices! She was plotting a getaway to Getaway!

22 Mar 20 - 07:27 PM (#4041424)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Huh? I've been soaking in Brandy.

22 Mar 20 - 10:44 PM (#4041464)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You're a cherry?

23 Mar 20 - 07:04 AM (#4041520)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm a yellow cheery cherry.
While I am straight, I've always said its better to be a fruit than a vegetable as in even Mayor Pete is more competant than Trump.

Yhe reason why Mom can't get a straight answer is because the Trump administration ordered federal health authorities to treat high-level discussions on the coronavirus as classified material.
In Taiwan there are only 100 cases for 25 million since they took the opposite approach of freedom of information.

Keep this under your hat because the fact that Covid 19 and the response is classified is also classified.

23 Mar 20 - 04:08 PM (#4041640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Straight WHAT?

23 Mar 20 - 04:12 PM (#4041644)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

sex

23 Mar 20 - 05:58 PM (#4041670)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Here we are, The Charge of the Last MOAB.

23 Mar 20 - 09:49 PM (#4041702)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I have both Tintin and Asterix books! In English, Irish, and Gaelic!

23 Mar 20 - 10:02 PM (#4041705)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I used all the white metal Asterix vikings to crew a model of a viking longship in stormy realistic seas.

24 Mar 20 - 12:31 PM (#4041832)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

A different way to wash your hands. Get out the dye and go to work.

24 Mar 20 - 01:40 PM (#4041848)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Everybody knows that the boat is leaking
Everybody knows the captain lied
Everybody got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died.
Everybody's nose is all infected
Somebody's nose is getting tested
Everybody knows they want to cry

24 Mar 20 - 09:37 PM (#4041933)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Uderzo is dead!

25 Mar 20 - 04:31 PM (#4042081)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Trust Dr. Trump's 'Coronex'
The doctor is a stable genius and has a knack for infectious pandemic infections.
To qualify for this treatment you must open a business or return to work the day after Easter. Dr. Trump is a deeply religious physician and requires that patients go to Easter services.
A paypal or credit card payment of 99.99 along with a picture of your church receipt (optional) may be texted to 1400 Penn Ave/coronex

Dr. Trump is a graduate of Trump University and guaratees you will have a result.

25 Mar 20 - 10:28 PM (#4042122)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, Mom, I'm have fusion surgery on the base of my left thumb on April Fool's Day.

I can see it. I'm coming out of the anesthesia, still groggy, and the doctor says, "April Fool! Here's your bill!"

26 Mar 20 - 05:58 AM (#4042157)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Memo to self re cherries: I soaked them in water for a day and they plumped up nicely. Then, I added vinegar and soaked them for another day to sanitize them. Then, I ate a bunch of them... at about 3AM, I ahhh, errr, never mind.

26 Mar 20 - 03:30 PM (#4042259)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm five weeks out from surgery and have had to start tapering the Tramadol. Damned stuff is difficult to just stop taking after a few weeks. I'm cutting the tablet (I went and asked the pharmacist if I could) and will hopefully be off of this in a few days.

All of that time I haven't been able to go near the Legion Hovel. No alcohol with narcotics. I notice the door wasn't posted so I guess the local officials feel that place is an essential business (where else will alcoholics get their fix?)

26 Mar 20 - 04:20 PM (#4042275)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Tramadol is not as addictive as a plain opoioid but it is far nastier.
Some people get
Seizures. Tramadol is known to cause seizures in some users. ...
Adrenal Insufficiency. ...
Androgen Insufficiency. ...
Respiratory Problems. ...
Hallucinations. ...
Serotonin Syndrome. ...
Liver and Kidney Damage. ...
Behavioral and Psychological Effects.

4 to 7 days of nastyitus will be a normal transition to your real self.

An inner voice will say
'if you need it dear, take it".
Listen to the safer voice, "you're better without it".

26 Mar 20 - 04:33 PM (#4042277)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I still have twinges and aches that take the cake but pain will not defeat me.

26 Mar 20 - 06:07 PM (#4042291)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I tapered Prednisone for 18 months. I can master this with my trusty little pill cutter, but I can't stand another day of feeling that gnarly.

26 Mar 20 - 07:23 PM (#4042306)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Ah, "tapering."
Here at the mental health residential clinic,
I hear a great deal from other patients about "tapering."
Tapering off Tramadol, tapering off Klonopin...
I really can't complain,
me with my little low daily dose of generic Prozac.

26 Mar 20 - 08:34 PM (#4042319)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Having had too many surgeries in the past few years, and my wife as well, we have left-over pain pills: Oxy and Hydro. We will use whatever is needed for this coming surgery and the remainder we'll ~~sell~~ give to the police. They have been locked up with the guns.

T-3 will be taken for the non-immediate time post-surgery, and NSAIDs and acetaminophen after that. I mean, why take them pills when the REAL stuff is the anesthesia, man?

27 Mar 20 - 10:11 AM (#4042407)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Perhaps these are miraculus times. Helena Montana is virus free with 0 cases and reports of similar miracals are just coming in. I shoukd have never doubted Trump. Coincidentally I have lost 43 lbs on the Crispy Creme diet. I seem to getting 1,200 miles per gallon. My mudcat posts are appearing in the editorial section of the NYT. Steve Shaw has become the sweetist man on Earth and Rap says he and his wife inexplicably woke up this morning in their 30's. The weather here is the same as Hawaii and mudcat hasn't crashed in a year.
Its like a miracle.

27 Mar 20 - 11:20 AM (#4042425)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Share some of that weed, don. It appears to be a very good batch.

27 Mar 20 - 03:15 PM (#4042468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I did watch Fox news last night but things are back to abnormal now.

28 Mar 20 - 03:57 PM (#4042669)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

William Shakspeare and Issac Newton did some of their best work while England was having a Plague. So are the analysts at the NSA and CIA today. While I can not discuss the details there is some noise about Operation Anal Portal wink wink nudge nudge. It is rumored to save a million lives.

28 Mar 20 - 06:51 PM (#4042707)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

sh-sh-sh There may be a plan to virally weaponize his bronzer.

28 Mar 20 - 09:16 PM (#4042729)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Why would anyone go to Helena, Montana in the first place? Of course it's COVID-19 free!

29 Mar 20 - 12:53 PM (#4042903)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Stilly I am thinking maybe a 100,000 cases of Covid was transferred from passing a joint whether it was in NYC, Colorado, California. N.O., Florida spring break and Washington State. Spit was transferred with abandon. Real Reefer Madness.

29 Mar 20 - 12:59 PM (#4042907)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That remarks needs to go on the coronavirus topic - I've worried about what it will look like in another week or so once two full weeks have passed after the insanity of spring break. Did those college students, now evicted from dorm rooms, go home to their parents to infect their families? I think that activity will be as bad or worse than the Mardi Gras stuff from early March. Yet Trump sits on the golden throne tweeting nonsense and fighting with governors who aren't nice to him.

Now back to the real BS - I finally got my Bluetooth headphones to transmit a signal so the computer could detect it. I can travel down that YouTube rabbit hole with the good quality sound of headphones versus the inadequate sound from my HD monitor (I got tired of having the extra set of speakers on my work desk, so just resolved to be unhappy with the sound. But now we're cooking with gas. Even if there is none plumbed to the house. . .

29 Mar 20 - 10:41 PM (#4043018)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We have a gas furnace and a gas stove. We've considered a gas fireplace but it's too much hassle to run the gas line. We're looking into one of those fake-fire electric heaters as there's an outlet about 3 feet from the fireplace opening (I wouldn't want to guess as to why).

30 Mar 20 - 07:56 AM (#4043091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The secret to peer into the future is to scrutinize the past.

In 1919-1920 people grew weary and stopped the very same social distancing measures we use today. As a result when the second wave arrived it was more catastrophic than it needed to be. And again with the 3rd wave.

Their past is our future.

Our own collective behavior will exaccerbate the outcome but does not cause the 2nd and 3rd wave.

30 Mar 20 - 11:04 AM (#4043129)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Bruce - no BS. Stay well. Our hearts are all broken.

Maggie

30 Mar 20 - 11:07 AM (#4043130)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You betcha! Blessings and good thoughts from Idaho.

30 Mar 20 - 07:27 PM (#4043254)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

MOM!

I was using my corded sickle-bar type hedge trimmers to, well, trim some hedges, and I got the extension cord caught in the mechanism. So, I cut the damaged part of the cord away and replaced the plug with another one. It took about fifteen minutes or so. Then, I went to resume my trimming and discovered that I had replaced the FEMALE plug I had cut off with a MALE plug. So, I have an extension cord with two male plugs and not a single female plug with ground wire in my entire collection of electrical repair crap.

Would somebody please find the reset button in my brain and push it?

31 Mar 20 - 04:39 AM (#4043298)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

MOM!

A friend gave me a box of "Harris Famous Roach Tablets" a while back. They don't work. I dropped one in a shallow pan of water a week ago and it's still just sitting there. Not a single roach has grown from it! Did I do it wrong? Maybe they need to be planted in dirt instead....

31 Mar 20 - 05:57 AM (#4043305)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL, I told the family to cease any activity of risk because there is no plan b. Plan b is going to the emergncy room which has more risk than plan A.

Dealing with poisons and whirring cutting blades qualify as plan A.
I have warned since January that there are new rules.
Mom says behave yourself.

PS vote by mail.

31 Mar 20 - 08:17 AM (#4043327)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Cock or eating roach? Or a hair roach? Or the fish? Or the guy we called Roach in high school?

Gee, at 10:20 a.m. MDT today I get an EMG. The cup of my life overflows.

31 Mar 20 - 11:27 AM (#4043370)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

My next door neighbor scored a #20 parcel of organic baking flour for me at Costco when making a run for her son (he's an essential worker who needed TP and couldn't get to the store for it.) With as hard as it is to find flour, and as many people baking up a storm (I see those photos on Instagram!), by the end of these stay-at-home orders we're going to have to force our way out of our doors, having blown up in size from all of the baked goods.

I agree with Don, sharp objects and electrical shock are probably less dangerous than going to the store right now. I would still advise against ax-throwing as a sport, in case you were considering it. It's not so much that your thrown ax will miss it's mark and break something, it's that you'll split open your calf in the back-swing. Years ago some Forest Service friends calculated the risks, thinking they might want to join the competition with local loggers. They concluded that it wasn't worth it.

31 Mar 20 - 03:58 PM (#4043423)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Same sex (non binary) Extension Cords are a rarity. LGBTQ-EC will defend their right to be, so don't throw it away. Better to make it a gift. Or save for an electrifying practical joke.

31 Mar 20 - 06:19 PM (#4043444)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Someone opened an axe-throwing bar in Pensacola a few months ago. Get sloshed and throw axes at targets! Or bring your own things you hate and throw axes at them until they're in pieces in the Rage Room!

Errrr... Hmmmm... Sorry guys, but I don't need to drive 45 miles into Pensacola if I want to throw axes at shit. I have lots of axes and hatchets and plenty of trees. And if I want to destroy some shit I don't like anymore, I prefer the option of using sledgehammers and firearms as well as axes

31 Mar 20 - 06:24 PM (#4043445)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

If you ever want to plug one house into another, you can use the cord with two male plugs to run between them. Will it transmit power? Who knows.

31 Mar 20 - 09:30 PM (#4043468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Danger? We've had an axe-throwing place for a year! But for REAL DANGER, just live here and endure this!

31 Mar 20 - 10:02 PM (#4043472)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ours was only 3.5 and I thought it was strong.
That was just last week wasn't it.
Don't worry bout the asteroid.

01 Apr 20 - 09:45 AM (#4043568)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

What do you think is going to hit Idaho? A banana?

But today, at 11 a.m. MDT, I get a HAND JOB!!!

01 Apr 20 - 11:13 AM (#4043595)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

A friend had hand surgery last week - have the ice handy and be prepared to have difficulty sleeping for a few nights. My condolences, but I hope it does the trick as far as fixing the problem!

Love that potato. Tough to peel, though.

01 Apr 20 - 12:38 PM (#4043613)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Damn I missed the setup for the hand job. touche'

02 Apr 20 - 07:19 PM (#4043692)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I had Aldi deliver some items that I didn't get on my last run and it isn't worth it to go out for "luxuries." Chocolate, beer, snacks. It was an expensive delivery, but I did my part supporting the gig economy. MOM would be proud, one of those items was some Shiner Bock beer; I haven't had any alcohol for a couple of months because of the surgery and medications involved.

02 Apr 20 - 07:34 PM (#4043693)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

No alcohol? WHAT DID THEY USE FOR ANESTHESIA??? I was given a couple of (full) glasses of whiskey and a .62 caliber musket ball to bite on! What sort of cheap-o surgeons do they have in Texas?

The surgeon said to Pat that there wasn't any cartilage left so "no wonder he hurt!" Now I'll wear a splint until the 15th and then a cast for six weeks. The bone has to fuse around the screw in my thumb bones.

02 Apr 20 - 11:59 PM (#4043718)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I'm having a serious case of All-You-Can-Eat Buffet Withdrawal! My favorite is a Thai buffet in Pensacola, but right now I'd settle for Chinese or Golden Corral or even KFC Buffet. I may even be willing to drive to Idaho to eat at the Chuck-a-Rama in Boise. (The only AYCE place I've ever been to that has more buffet space devoted to potato dishes than salads, meats, and vegetables combined.)

03 Apr 20 - 01:21 PM (#4043828)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Idaho produces more lentils than potatoes, and nearly as much barley.

03 Apr 20 - 08:06 PM (#4043898)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

So why doesn't Chuck-a-Rama have a lentil bar?

03 Apr 20 - 08:17 PM (#4043901)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I have lentil soup in my fridge right now. If you drive to Idaho, travel via Texas and you can sit in the driveway and I'll put a bowl of hot soup on the porch (using gloves and a mask) and then you're on your way. You'll be in a better frame of mind for Idaho (and Rap has a huge honker house - you could stay in his basement or somewhere and they'd hardly know you were around. Just watch it in case the shower head is still hot-wired.)

03 Apr 20 - 09:54 PM (#4043906)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I've lost about twenty pounds in the last few weeks! I've been on the Loss and Misery Diet. I don't recommend it. Try Weight-Watchers instead.

03 Apr 20 - 11:25 PM (#4043911)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Then again, the weight loss may be partly due to the aforementioned temporary closure of all the All-You-Can-Eat Buffet restaurants.

04 Apr 20 - 12:05 AM (#4043916)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Either way, self-care is the Rx. Get takeout from another place that serves so you have something to eat in the house - that you can pop in the microwave. That loss and misery diet is brutal; I was on it one time and ended up 50 pounds less than I am now (which is about 30 pounds over normal).

These days I have at least one really easy meal ready to go each day. I just set up a small crockpot with steel cut oats, raisins, a dash of salt, and a quart of boiling water, and I'll have about 3 days of breakfasts (it reheats well.) Even if it means keeping a tub of cottage cheese in the fridge and a case of honeybuns in the freezer, give yourself something really easy for a meal.

04 Apr 20 - 11:02 AM (#4043974)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We're not going out much (of course) but we are eating well. It is, however, beginning to look like the neighborhood is running out of pets.

If you were wondering, the Legion Hovel has been declared "Extra Special Essential" by all levels of government. It has a Super Duper Essential Priority 1-AAAA for everything it wants or needs. The last time it ran short of beer the riots destroyed most of the cities of Boise, Meridian, Twin Falls, Heck, Idaho Falls, Hamer, Couer d'Alene, Bliss, and Dingle. Inkom was slightly damaged as well.

05 Apr 20 - 09:52 AM (#4044114)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Classic

05 Apr 20 - 06:35 PM (#4044220)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

No, Classic wasn't damaged. Stanley was, a little bit, but not Classic.

05 Apr 20 - 09:01 PM (#4044246)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's hard to damage an abandoned ghost town like Classic.

06 Apr 20 - 07:37 AM (#4044359)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Tie up the knocker, say I'm sick, I'm dead.
The dog-star rages! nay 'tis past a doubt,
All Bedlam, or Parnassus, is let out:
Fire in each eye, and papers in each hand,
They rave, recite, and madden round the land.

What walls can guard me, or what shades can hide?
They pierce my thickets, through my grot they glide;
By land, by water, they renew the charge;
They stop the chariot, and they board the barge.

06 Apr 20 - 09:26 AM (#4044392)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Most towns around here eventually become something else as evidenced by road names that do tend to remain the same.

Maryland Route 5 (Leonardtown Road), which joins US 301 in Brandywine to the north and splits at the county line to bypass Waldorf on Mattawoman-Beantown Road...The sewage treatment plant is of course in former Beantown.

'Ghost' towns around here are either gentrified or left to highly populated decrepitude based mostly on race.

As for Mattawoman, it has a story lost in the fog of history along with Parnasus NJ.

06 Apr 20 - 01:04 PM (#4044449)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Early maps identify the area where Mattawomen later became incorporated, as the vast Pat Hopschtingle farm. The limited information from Ancestory.com says that Pat was of Irish German descent but lists no gender which calls into speculation that Mattawoman became short for Man or Woman?

06 Apr 20 - 03:00 PM (#4044478)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Make my grave in the Trump Hotel,
Not a lowly plain, or a lofty hill;
Put it at the end of the escaltor,
On the doorstep of the great imitator .

Engrave Trump lies around my grave.
Like Arlington make sure that I stay
His shadow above my silent tomb
Would make it a place of fear & gloom.

I could rest in the noise of Fifth Avenue
On my birthday you can have free barbecue.
Try to manage a shriek of wild despair
Like a million curses in NYC air.

I could not sleep if Trump went free
His dieing in prison is reason for glee
Such a cruel narcissist unfeeling beast
should be punished for his hateful beliefs.

Let my grave in the Trump Hotel help remind
how the US was fired, attacked by virus and died
One day Trump hotels will be demolished.
Maybe men like Trump will be abolished

I ask no monument, proud and high,
To arrest the gaze of the passers-by;
All that my yearning spirit craves,
Is if he outlives me he'll not stay

06 Apr 20 - 05:48 PM (#4044527)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Enraged, outraged, up raged and down raged.
I feel we were completely and deliberately betrayed.
Messengers and facts were deflected as HOAX!
With loss of life these are no longer jokes.
Our lack of preparation is mostly homemade.
Our medicine is to hide and not be afraid.
Janitors and ministers alike cough and choke.
Sad that the innocent and guilty must both croak.

06 Apr 20 - 07:21 PM (#4044544)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Who is this nobody?
"Nobody has ever seen such a great economy, Nobody has ever seen such great numbers. Nobody can believe such miracles I have made".
Does nobody mean No one or is there a real Mr. Nobody?

And what about fantastic?
"I have fantastic numbers. I have made fantastic progress".
Doesn't fantastic mean; imaginative or fanciful; remote from reality?

Doesn't incredible mean without credibility? the word Unbelievable is equal to incredible.

In the next 5 o'clock speech,
Count how many times you hear the words; nobody, fantastic, unbelievable and incredible.

Divide by the number of times of the word tremendous is mentioned and...

You will get a coefficient either above five or below 5.
Below 5 is a gigantic lieing ass hole
Above 5 is a huge lieing ass hole

06 Apr 20 - 07:31 PM (#4044547)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

As Wavy Gravy once stated for the record,
"In fact, Nobody's perfect."

06 Apr 20 - 09:39 PM (#4044564)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mr. Nobody ran against Betty Boop for President.

06 Apr 20 - 10:01 PM (#4044568)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I stand corrected rejected and infected.
I see politics can make anyone two faced, or even three.

That implied free beer campaign promise is a winner.
or was that the advent of subliminal advertising.

07 Apr 20 - 08:57 AM (#4044642)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Covid Cartoon

07 Apr 20 - 05:18 PM (#4044709)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I am so angry! When I built the cabinets in my kitchen over twenty years ago, I made the drawers just a bit over ten inches wide because that was the width of a wicker cutlery tray we had. Who knows where it came from. It was just there. I assumed the tray was of a standard size and that we'd be able to get a replacement when needed. Over the years, being wicker and in regular use, the tray started to get raggedy and my wife began to hound me about replacing it. That's when I found that it was definitely NOT a standard size. I must have tried to find a replacement for ten years or more. Today, I accomplished the goal! I found a cutlery tray exactly 10.04 inches wide. It fits in the drawer like they were custom made for each other!

So, to recap, after many years of trying to please my wife by replacing our ratty cutlery tray, I finally find one that's perfect. And my wife's no longer around to be pleased. Fuck!

07 Apr 20 - 09:13 PM (#4044722)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh, she's around. She'll always be around.

07 Apr 20 - 10:34 PM (#4044736)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Thanks, Mike.

08 Apr 20 - 09:13 PM (#4044760)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Where virus go to dream

08 Apr 20 - 09:28 PM (#4044762)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I am told a Virus is only half alive
Its half a strand of DNA
Yet its always here to stay
They even all have the same first name.
Something like ReN A

09 Apr 20 - 10:45 AM (#4044869)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Three days away from a full 14 days of not going into any other buildings like the grocery store or the Legion Hovel. I did deliver my water bill to a drop-off slot (didn't touch it with my hand) and to the gas station for 2 gallons of mower gas (used a glove on the pump and washed my credit card when I got home.)

The worst part of being about 95% over the total knee replacement surgery is that I'm all fixed up but there's no place to go.

For you guys who might not sew (I know several who do, so I won't assume anything here): yet another approach to making facemasks, this time out of short tube socks.

09 Apr 20 - 10:24 PM (#4044972)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

An old plastic bag (the older the better -- RECYCLE! REUSE!) is excellent protection. So is a good old-fashioned gas mask or any of several variants of PPE such as these ambulance workers demonstrate.

10 Apr 20 - 08:31 PM (#4045225)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

As a hunter, for bargains, I went for for this.

I'm waiting for this one.

10 Apr 20 - 09:43 PM (#4045233)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

No ordering masks, I've pulled out a bunch of my stash and am deciding what layers need to go together, and trying a couple of different designs. For all of those people who sew or quilt or do various fabric arts, suddenly our stashes are pure gold. Until now we laughed about the excess. No more.

MOM wants a flannel mask but since it's a plaid print she's being fussy and insisting that the pattern be aligned down the center seam. She'll relax a little once I make the curbside pickup of adult beverages from the local Total Wine and More store. I'm planning to redistribute a bottle to a friend who hasn't been able to visit his favorite bar for weeks now, but there's a bottle for the house also.

10 Apr 20 - 10:49 PM (#4045240)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A double layer of cotton quilting fabric handles a lot of The Bad Stuff. Put some high-grade furnace filter stuff between them, if you have it (use new stuff, not used filter stuff).

I went out today for the first time in 9 days. I wore my mask and stuff like a good citizen and I left my shootin' iron at home 'cause I didn't see no need fer it just then.

11 Apr 20 - 08:42 AM (#4045312)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I really do have a 20 year old silver hazmat fireproof suit with helmut and gold reflective face shield. I haven' t had to put out any oil well fires so it is in good shape. I was going to donate it to the fire dept. but never got a roundtuit.

12 Apr 20 - 02:09 AM (#4045451)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There is a puppy snoring gently as she sleeps behind me in my office this evening.

That is all. (That is enough!)

12 Apr 20 - 09:29 AM (#4045565)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Diversion is good

with the young

12 Apr 20 - 12:49 PM (#4045617)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

Somebody's gonna have to 'splain this one to me....

I called the Social Security Administration the other day to report my wife's passing as required by law. Now, when a spouse dies, the widow or widower is entitled to a one-time death benefit of something like $250.

It seems to me that everyone reporting the death of a spouse who is a Social Security beneficiary is also going to want to apply for the death benefit. So, one would think that since the two are so closely associated, one should be able to do both things with one phone call, right? Wrong! I had to make an appointment for someone to call me back a week later to take my application for the death benefit over the phone. If it wasn't such an overused phrase, I'd say, "Go figger!"

12 Apr 20 - 02:20 PM (#4045648)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm not a somebody but I am a splainer.
Income or keeping $ has a priority over payouts; section 1 of the large print giveth and the small print taketh away statute under the primary governing principal page 1.

btw they say nobody's perfect so not being perfect I'm not a nobody either which makes me more of an everybody.

Pertaining to your rights

12 Apr 20 - 02:45 PM (#4045660)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Best to make that call quickly because they reach into the bank account and snatch back out anything they overpaid. That was the case when my father died and I was figuring out that stuff.

Making masks today; MOM wants one that has a hole for a straw so she can drink a Long Island iced tea today without taking off the mask.

12 Apr 20 - 07:33 PM (#4045699)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

US Army gas masks used to be equipped so that the person wearing it could safely drink from a canteen. I didn't have that option, but we were tough then and would rather breathe nerve gas than die of thirst (30 seconds versus several days). It was a special canteen cap that had a straw-system so you could suck up water from inside your mask and, I assume, drink it rather than drown.

13 Apr 20 - 09:15 AM (#4045799)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

But nerve gas is illegal.

Now we have nerve creams, gels, sprays time release capsules, family sized 55 gallon drums and suppositories.

13 Apr 20 - 05:33 PM (#4045900)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Phalangeal psorisis (itchy trigger finger) is a disorder that has appeared in Horseshoe Bend Idaho. Cortisone cream looks like a promising treatment.

HOLY SH.. I hear a commercial airliner outside. hmm

14 Apr 20 - 09:48 AM (#4046030)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

(when praying to god doesn't work)

I am not skilled to understand
What Trump has willed, what Trump has planned
I only know at his right hand
Is Pense who's really grand

I take him at his word and deed
He tried to save me: this I read
And in my heart I find a need.
of his powerful greed

That he won't leave his place on high
To let older men to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my Donald

My Donald needs, my Donald's greed
My Donalds's always on TV
My Trump; He was, my Trump; He is
My Trump; is always gonna be

Yes, living, dying: let me bring
My Strength, my solace in this spring
That He who lives to be THE King
Once ran to be my Savior

My Donald needs, my Donald's greed
My Donald's always there for me
My TRUMP; He was, my TRUMP; He is
My TRUMP; is always gonna be
There for me.

Amen

14 Apr 20 - 07:48 PM (#4046146)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It feels like Betelgeuse is gonna blow this week.
Ya can'tmissit, it'll be as bright as the full moon.

The ol reumatiz acts up right before a super Nova

14 Apr 20 - 08:44 PM (#4046151)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The supernova early warning system is now online. Maybe we'll hear something soon (if the bloviating hothead in Washington D.C. doesn't drown it out.) We get 2 hours notice before it blows.

I hear it here.

14 Apr 20 - 08:56 PM (#4046153)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I wonder if the Galactic Overlord isn't simply turning down Betelgeuse with some sort of stellar dimmer switch, perhaps to save money on the starlight bill.

15 Apr 20 - 09:57 PM (#4046348)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom? Mom? Did you hear the news, Mom? I've got a genuine fiberglass CAST on now! It's RED with black edges! And the stitches are out!

16 Apr 20 - 01:17 AM (#4046353)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The only cast I've ever had was black. That's all. Just black. All the cool colors were gone. Musta been lotsa people breakin' shit that week.

16 Apr 20 - 01:42 AM (#4046356)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

My last cast was so long ago it was white plaster, put on in layers by the doctor. I was seven and had done a fairly good job of breaking my leg.

16 Apr 20 - 12:23 PM (#4046483)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Shoulda paid da man his money, see? Me, I let the doc break it so he could screw it up. But you, Stilly, don't borry no money offa Da Man. You tell me and I'll fix ya up wid Da Lady and she'll treat ya right, see?

17 Apr 20 - 10:51 AM (#4046658)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Someone needs to be in charge of the notions department at Amazon. They are focusing on "essential items" in their delivery, I bet they figure that's food and medicine, right? Don't they know that elastic and rotary cutter blades are essential? How else will this army of home-sewers make all of these necessary face masks? I'm taking more time to make the bias tape than I am to make the masks themselves.

17 Apr 20 - 11:36 AM (#4046667)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There was a cessation of the sale of non essential items for nearly 2 weeks at Amazon. Non essentail sales has since resumed.

The definition of success is similair to the definition of Democracy in that once everything else fails due to stupidity and waste, what you are left with will serve as success no matter how dismal. Nothing goes exactly as planned.

In operation Walkyrie, the Bergdorf in Mara Lago will be...

17 Apr 20 - 12:37 PM (#4046676)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Pat has started making both pleated and fitted masks for the Veterans' Home here. Here's one of the fabrics she's using. This is another.

17 Apr 20 - 02:26 PM (#4046693)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Cute! And I bet she has a stash that is more than ample to work with for these masks. I have the pattern for the fitted masks, but I haven't made any yet.

I put two 3/4 size masks in the mail to my hairdresser (I also mailed her the payment she would have gotten this week for my bi-monthly haircut and highlights.) She has a three-almost-four-year-old daughter, so I pulled out polka dots for those. I hear this morning that they are a hit! She didn't like the masks that were too large for her.

17 Apr 20 - 04:34 PM (#4046714)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The wife has made them for 3 weeks and has a distributor at NIH
Running low on elastic though.
The us verses them strategy is alive and well in Texas regarding the death epidemic. They are resuming pre pandemic behavior at the peak of infection as per Govenor Trump Pal orders. %^|...

17 Apr 20 - 04:55 PM (#4046718)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

TX has done 160,000 tests, virtually all by private lab$.

17 Apr 20 - 05:44 PM (#4046723)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

3 STEPS TO REOPEN AMERICA

Expose yourself to general population and get tested if you can

Fight off whatever symptoms if any.

If you don't die go on with life.

18 Apr 20 - 01:40 PM (#4046870)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

Here's a helpful hint! When you open a can of fruit cocktail, always dump it into a bowl or refrigerator container before serving. When most cans of fruit cocktail are filled, they're filled one ingredient at a time. So you wind up with stratified layers of peaches, pears, grapes, pineapple, and cherry halves, in that order. If you serve directly from the can, the first servings get all the "good" stuff and the last couple get nothing but peaches and pears. Dump it into a bowl and stir it up before serving so it's all the same mix.

18 Apr 20 - 07:38 PM (#4046921)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

I had something to say, and forgot what it was.

18 Apr 20 - 09:47 PM (#4046930)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Immortal Unknown BS! The Dark BS that the Universe is full of!

Stilly, this was all of these fabrics. Let us say that she won't run out of fabric in general in the next few days.

19 Apr 20 - 07:14 AM (#4046995)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

When you forget what you wanted to say, it's just Mom's way if telling you that your BS needs to compost a while longer before it's ready to spread on the garden.

19 Apr 20 - 08:44 AM (#4047012)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Man's Ultra Ripe Excrement or 'Man'ure is fertile ground for bringing new things to life. In recent times however heavy metals and remnants of medication act as mutating pollutants. We have been selling these organic solids, spreading them on farm fields and wonder where all the ecoli outbreaks come from.

19 Apr 20 - 01:02 PM (#4047046)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Now for something completely different.

19 Apr 20 - 01:20 PM (#4047051)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The International Time Travel Agency's failure to assist us in our current predicament was forecast long ago (in the future). While our future chrononauts were not vaccinated for Covid 19 they could not assist us if they wanted to. The message would not reach them anyway if they were on the way to Saggistarius A star or in near orbit around that black hole to vault them even further into the furure.

We can go physically into the future with face to face results but going back in time, while technically real, we can not be physically present.

It is 5 o'clock somewhere but it is not minus 1:14pm today anywhere or anywhen.

20 Apr 20 - 08:47 PM (#4047303)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I tried to tell you of my parboiling discovery yesterday but somehow it didn't take. So anyway, I want to parboil a couple peppers (emptied, of course) to make stuffed peppers. But instead of parboiling them (I didn't have time) I put them in a (microwave safe) pan with about an inch of water in it. Nuked 'em for about 2 minutes, turned 'em over and nuked 'em for about 90 more seconds. Took 'em out, dumped the water, put the shells back in, filled 'em with the filling, and baked 'em for 20 minutes.

Tasted good.

21 Apr 20 - 02:55 PM (#4047468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The whole deal is the filling, which you avoided mentioning.
filling;
Browned Ground beef, thickened tomato sauce, a'zar seasoning, magic muhroom bits, Tampico, THC edibles, diced onion, celery salt and riccota cheese n chives to glue it all together.

Hey check out my face mask/ feedbag invention for sit down restaurant use. :^}

21 Apr 20 - 06:34 PM (#4047508)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I don't even know anyone who has been tested. If I ever get tested and it turns out negative I will be disheartened knowing I never had asymptomatic or mild infection which would leave me open to all the variations. Trump was tested twice to determine if he is human but with a 30% error rate I am still skeptical.

21 Apr 20 - 10:15 PM (#4047542)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'd like to know how someone like Donald John Trump, born brunette, is now a blonde. As a life-long blonde I object.

21 Apr 20 - 10:34 PM (#4047543)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If you ever see a photo of Donald's mom, all will be answered.

River's are starting to look cleaner

22 Apr 20 - 11:01 AM (#4047621)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Trump Task Force Medical Advisor (Fauci replacement)
Dr, Ronald Armslong

22 Apr 20 - 09:07 PM (#4047722)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom? Mom? Donde vamos ahora?

22 Apr 20 - 09:22 PM (#4047724)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Gone with flowers everyone
oh when will they ever learn...

23 Apr 20 - 08:03 AM (#4047810)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

Dollar Tree lies! They say "Everything's a Dollar!" So I rented the biggest truck I could find, hired a couple of winos to help out, went to the Dollar Tree store, paid 'em a dollar, and started pulling stuff off the shelves and loading it into the truck. The bastards called the cops!

23 Apr 20 - 01:22 PM (#4047883)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I had to take the middle-sized dog to the vet today to get a heartworm test so they would sell me their very expensive monthly heartworm treatment. Next week I have to take the Lab in for his annual exam and get his heartworm treatment. I've been buying heartworm brand-name products from the UK for about 1/3 the cost than from US vets, but my UK supplier can't guarantee shipment with so few planes flying back and forth across that pond.

I don't think the mosquitoes are taking a break during the coronavirus shutdown. So I'm stuck with this situation for now. MOM says it would cost more to spray the dogs with mosquito repellent every day, and I guess she has a point.

23 Apr 20 - 03:13 PM (#4047900)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I forgot about the starving mosquitos.

23 Apr 20 - 06:24 PM (#4047950)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

"Heartguard" the most popular heartworm medication sold by vets is nothing but ivermectin and pyrantel, two very common worm and parasite killers. You can get them from Tractor Supply in paste forms meant to be used with livestock, like cattle and horses. The cost is only pennies per dose. Yet the same stuff packaged for your dog costs $10.00 per dose? If I was sure I'd get the dosage right, I'd tell the vet to go screw and mix my own heartworm medicine up in the kitchen.

23 Apr 20 - 08:36 PM (#4047978)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL it has come to my attention that you are qualified to lead the huge sprawling agency called Health and Human Services. The current head of HHS only has a background of being a breeder of Labradoodles in the last decade. You are far more qualified especially in these pandemic times.

23 Apr 20 - 09:57 PM (#4047982)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Labradoodles? You mean Trump couldn't even find a dog breeder who breeds purebred AKC registered dogs? Only some asshole who breeds mixed-breed mutts and then sells them for money? (Not that I have anything against mixed breed mutts. I have one. It's just that they should be for adopting, not selling.)

24 Apr 20 - 01:36 AM (#4048001)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The small-animal vet version of Heartguard is a topical skin application, the chemicals are dissolved in alcohol, or so it smells. And it's more like $25 a dose at this point. That's why I buy it from the UK, they cost a lot less (I use the UK version of Revolution, it's called Stronghold over there, and to order you need to know how much your dog weighs in kilos, not pounds. But the clue is the color of the box; my two largest dogs get the Teal box, US or UK.)

24 Apr 20 - 07:29 PM (#4048267)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Have you checked Canada?

24 Apr 20 - 08:27 PM (#4048276)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I assume there is no hockey in Canada right now.

26 Apr 20 - 09:01 AM (#4048596)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

MOAB is dangerously close to the end of the queue,
and only we can alter that.

26 Apr 20 - 09:14 AM (#4048607)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A quarom is not present.
Without at least twelve individuals as disciples, it is incapable of maintaining quality BS or near magical accomplishments.

26 Apr 20 - 11:10 AM (#4048640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It was a lot easier when we had Amos' help. He could crank out the BS.

26 Apr 20 - 11:19 AM (#4048643)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Amos was far more fact based than you suggest. He used to rail against me for not posting links. He had an unusual visual poetic skill.
Rap is the BS king by ascention to the thrown.

26 Apr 20 - 09:37 PM (#4048771)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I would be happy to rail against anyone or anything worthy of my talents. After all, I come from the Country Of THE Rail-Splitter himself (cf. Here, among other places.). More, I shall endeavor -- nay, assure you -- that you will get quality railing and splitting as I also come from a land where Truth is valued. For I, among others, am an inheritor of their skills. Should you not believe me, I to demonstrate my ability to any triple-twisted, double-distilled, jackass who wishes to open his (well, it IS a jackass) throat to bray against me.

27 Apr 20 - 01:25 AM (#4048797)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'll agree with you there, but Amos managed to keep the volume flowing (and wrote a lot of poems in the process.)

27 Apr 20 - 07:43 AM (#4048839)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ah it is becoming clear to me Rap's alter ego is Mark Twain while mine is Dave Berry

Moab is treading water until Moab advertises for more 'members' or the last Yukon prospector falls frozen in the sbow.

27 Apr 20 - 10:41 AM (#4048902)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom does not "tread water." Mom drinks water -- with various added substances to kill the germs of all sorts.

The grayness of Spring colors my soul,
And the tired river,
Full of flood,
Carries its sticks from eddy to eddy
Until, at last,
They find rest on the soft, silent bottom
Of the sea.
--Me, ca. 1966

27 Apr 20 - 11:09 AM (#4048909)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

From a mile away my river could be seen
writhing above its banks with ice flows
big enough to ride all thumping and bumping
each other in the great grinding gorge.
Up close the noise was a gutteral thunder
and the scary speed made me catch my balance
as the small to 3 foot thick ice raced by.
Its my river no more.
Not even the ice remains in Spring.
The climate has changed and the river
now fast and silent
keeps all its secrets.

27 Apr 20 - 06:46 PM (#4049001)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

On the links the golfers come and go
Not speaking of Michaelangelo.
-- Thomas S. Eliot, "Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"
(version one)

27 Apr 20 - 06:49 PM (#4049003)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Note to self: vacuum under the fridge and freezer a couple of times a year and you won't have to pay the repair person to discover that that was the only thing wrong with the fridge. I can't think of the last time I thought to vacuum under there.

27 Apr 20 - 08:42 PM (#4049015)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Never, ever, look under your bed.

28 Apr 20 - 10:06 PM (#4049221)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

After yesterday's appeal hearing to the Idaho State Tax Commission's Board of Equalization, Pat and I have spent the day relaxing. Tomorrow I shall make Icelandic rye bread and Icelandic wild mushroom soup after a session with the massage therapist.

Six weeks preparation for the hearing and I think our county Assessor, who was "the other side", learned not to interact with Pat (BA, Math; MA, Library Science; Post-grad fellowship in computers in medical libraries; statistician for NIH; JD, etc.). We think it went well.

Just two more weeks and the cast comes off!

28 Apr 20 - 11:20 PM (#4049228)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I delivered more masks today, this time a custom-sized set for a big guy with a beard. Tonight is a break from sewing, but I'm sure it will pick up again tomorrow. #SewAndSew

29 Apr 20 - 07:16 PM (#4049428)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

It's April 29. I live in Florida. Why am I running an electric space heater? Because it's going to get down into the 40s for the next two nights. That's probably normal for this time of year for people who live in, say, Idaho. But, allow me to repeat, "I live in Florida." We don't HAVE temperatures below 50 after April Fools' Day. It's gotta be because of what's going on with Betelgeuse.

29 Apr 20 - 10:13 PM (#4049456)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Betelgeusians annoyed the GO and the GO is switching Betelgeuse off -- slowly, to give them time to appreciate their folly. Or at least that's what the Vegans (not the dietary type) tell me.

30 Apr 20 - 08:49 AM (#4049537)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I may only have a million year window for Betelgeuse to go kaphlooey so I'm going out on a limb here and predict it will be seen to go kaphlooey at 3:07 AM EDST this Sunday morning. BWL got a severe storm today that will do more damage than Betelgeuse and Rap will stick out like a sore thumb.
US covid deaths will pass 100,000 by the 4th of July Trump Parade or die tryin.
Were #1 were #1

30 Apr 20 - 01:23 PM (#4049578)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, the Icelandic rye bread is in the slow cooker (a/k/a crock pot) and in a bread pan on the stove, just a-steaming away. I'll know is three or four hours how I did. Now I make the mushroom soup.

30 Apr 20 - 02:42 PM (#4049588)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Last summer I think I set up a pulley system to help me drag to old fence posts with their concrete footers out of the holes; I have to reproduce it this year but I don't remember where I found it. I guess it's back to YouTube. I don't have one of those jacks that pops them out so quickly. Maybe I'll finish digging them out this year (five to go). MOM is sitting under the shade on the patio offering advice. Good thing she's a bit hard of hearing.

30 Apr 20 - 04:40 PM (#4049617)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Decades before zip lines I set up a pulley system at the mountain farm for my own amusement ride like Zorba the geek.

To replace all 300 ft + of solid fence cost 10K.

30 Apr 20 - 08:40 PM (#4049647)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Go to a farm supply store and get a heavy-duty come-along.

01 May 20 - 01:56 PM (#4049798)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

post #870 new moab
sqrt 870 = 29.49576240750525
or 2.90200763 × 10 to the -6 s / m when divided by the speed of light...
my lucky number sqrt for powerball
also

25,000 total donuel posts.... times light speed 7.19501899 × 10 to the 12th m / s minus 1,000 posts

01 May 20 - 01:59 PM (#4049799)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rap has 4000+ to go for 50,000 posts

01 May 20 - 06:15 PM (#4049851)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I look not for quantity, but the quality which is my hallmark.

01 May 20 - 09:34 PM (#4049876)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Made Icelandic mushroom soup. Quite good, but it's not like having it at the Hotal Ranga in Iceland or in downtown Reykjavik. Besides, I used dried morels and dried "medley" as well as a bunch of the mushrooms you can get in the grocery. And not having any madeira on hand I used a dry white cabarnet sauvignon. A rich soup, and good.

02 May 20 - 10:52 AM (#4049955)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

1. Oh my name it is nothin'
My age it means less
The country I come from
Is called the Midwest
I's taught and brought up there
The laws to abide
And that land that I live in
Has God on its side.
2. Oh the history books tell it
They tell it so well
The cavalries charged
The Indians fell
The cavalries charged
The Indians died
Oh the country was young
With God on its side.
3. Oh the Spanish-American
War had its day
And the Civil War too
Was soon laid away
And the names of the heroes
I's made to memorize
With guns in their hands
And God on their side.
4. Oh the First World War, boys
It came and it went
The reason for fighting
I never did get
But I learned to accept it
Accept it with pride
For you don't count the dead
When God's on your side.
5. When the Second World War
Came to an end
We forgave the Germans
And then we were friends
Though they murdered six million
In the ovens they fried
The Germans now too
Have God on their side.
6. I've learned to hate the Russians
All through my whole life
If another war comes
It's them we must fight
To hate them and fear them
To run and to hide
And accept it all bravely
With God on my side.
7. But now we got weapons
Of biological dust
If fire them we're forced to
Then fire them we must
One push of the button
And a shot the world wide
And you never ask questions
When God's on your side.
8. Through isolation days
I've heard old war cries
between the blues and greys
Reds say $ is above lives
Some blame it on the yellow
You'll have to decide
Who rings most hollow
Had God on his side.
9. So now as I'm coughin'
I'm weary as hell
The confusion I'm feelin'
Ain't no tongue can tell
The words fill my head
And fall to the floor
That if God's on our side
He'll stop the next war.

02 May 20 - 01:18 PM (#4049990)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I cried when they shot Medgar Evers
Tears ran down my spine
And I cried when they shot Mr. Kennedy
As though I'd lost a father of mine
But Malcolm X got what was coming
He got what he asked for this time
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal
Get it?

I go to civil rights rallies
And I put down the old D.A.R (D.A.R., that's the Dykes of the American Revolution)
I love Harry and Sidney and Sammy
I hope every colored boy becomes a star
But don't talk about revolution
That's going a little bit too far
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

I cheered when Humphrey was chosen
My faith in the system restored
I'm glad that the Commies were thrown out
Of the A.F.L. C.I.O. board
And I love Puerto Ricans and Negros
As long as they don't move next door
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

Ah, the people of old Mississippi
Should all hang their heads in shame
Now, I can't understand how their minds work
What's the matter don't they watch Les Crane?
But if you ask me to bus my children
I hope the cops take down your name
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

Yes, I read New Republic and Nation
I've learned to take every view
You know, I've memorized Lerner and Golden
I feel like I'm almost a Jew
But when it comes to times like Korea
There's no one more red, white and blue
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

I vote for the democratic party
They want the U.N. to be strong
I attend all the Pete Seeger concerts
He sure gets me singing those songs
And I'll send all the money you ask for
But don't ask me to come on along
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

Once I was young and impulsive
I wore every conceivable pin
Even went to the socialist meetings
Learned all the old Union hymns
But I've grown older and wiser
And that's why I'm turning you in
So love me, love me, love me, I'm a liberal

02 May 20 - 03:40 PM (#4050015)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ochs for godsake. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3qgiNPVpSM

02 May 20 - 04:19 PM (#4050020)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGu__oqMcKM

02 May 20 - 04:20 PM (#4050021)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGu__oqMcKM

02 May 20 - 05:55 PM (#4050029)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I remembered what I did last time - I dodn't have the jack for pulling out posts so I put on safety goggles and got out a 2-pound hammer and a concrete chisel and knocked off enough of the concrete until I could lift the entire thing out of the hole. Two left.

02 May 20 - 10:08 PM (#4050048)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If she had a hammer, she'd hammer in the mornin' she'd hammer in the evenin' all over her fence....

Stilly said to the shaker,"Shaker, you better pray, 'cause if I miss with this two-pound hammer tomorrow be your buryin' day, Lord Lord....

03 May 20 - 03:35 PM (#4050177)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hammers and concrete, thats pretty hard core. It looks like things harder than tapioca could get one suspended or banned subject to commitee/secret police review.
There have been posts complaining of Gestapo tactics here for more than 20 years by all sorts of lively characters. The issues of separating issues of humour, misinformation, misunderstanding or deliberate hate are still a question for Big Facebook or tiny mudcat.

BS'MOAB' has been pared down to a mudpuddle so small there is a diverity shortage that is noticable. Perhaps because of the pandemic I miss strangers more, be they intelligent, inane, insane, or inable.

When it comes to comedy is nothing sacred? YES

Regarding the subject of trollism I selected exactly one testy elitist to demonstrate how funny silly trollism is. A few people get it but it doesn't make me a troll anymore than making fun of gambling makes me a gambler.

As for selling secrets to the Russians I never have, because I am not a Republican.

I guess Betelgeuse is running late. :^?

03 May 20 - 08:13 PM (#4050216)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Cetheora aipgitre báse: báithe, condailbe, imresan, doingthe.
--Kuno Meyer, Triads, 252.

04 May 20 - 09:39 PM (#4050540)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Three things that are the best in the world: the hand of a good carpenter, the hand of a skilled woman, the hand of a good smith.
--Meyer, Triads, 76.

06 May 20 - 10:23 PM (#4050922)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

No one has posted ANY BS in the last two days??? There hasn't been ANY??

I doubt that! Get on the stick, sibs!

06 May 20 - 11:03 PM (#4050927)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I tore down my wood-fire kiln today. I built the arch about twenty-five years ago from salvaged fire brick I got at no charge for hauling it away. But I never finished the other parts (firebox, front and rear walls, chimney) for various reasons, including that I was going to have to buy new brick to finish the project and it was going to cost a shitload. So today, twenty-five years later, I decided the bricks could be put to better use as pavers or something and tore it all down. One man, one hydraulic bottle jack, one length of two-by-four, one crowbar, one big pile of bricks, no injuries.

07 May 20 - 12:48 AM (#4050940)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I seem to change my mind about piles of limestone around here every few years. I've built small walls around the yard then moved them or used them as pavers. We're just speeding up geological time a little around our yards.

07 May 20 - 10:09 AM (#4051021)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Bee-Dub, is that fire near you? Or were you just firing pots?

07 May 20 - 04:32 PM (#4051091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I did laundry today and it's a nice dry windy day on which I would normally hang some of these clothes on the line. But I don't know if the puppy will leave them alone and I don't want to spray that Petco "Yuck!" on my clothes to get her to leave them alone. I'll have to test her ability to leave stuff alone with an old pair of jeans that I don't wear any more (so if they get shredded she'll get shouted at but I won't be out a favorite pair of pants).

Dogs. You can't live with them and you can't live without them. Well, not very well, anyway. Life is better with dogs.

07 May 20 - 08:10 PM (#4051125)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Rap, that fire is in this county, but about 25 miles south if where I live. I just hope the yahoos in this part of the county can resist the urge to burn trash piles and such until after we get some rain.

08 May 20 - 09:44 AM (#4051215)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

All the songs about pandemic seem morbid or profane. So here is a zippy calypso beat with steel drums and a tune we all already know.
You know, the one sung by a red crab. ENJOY A Happy tune
Under the sea:

The sickest are always greener
In somebody else's State
You dream about going 'up' there
But that is a big mistake
Just look at the world around you
Right here at blue heaven's gate
Such wonderful things surround you
What is your ultimate fate?

In Quarantine
In Quarantine
Each little griever
Down with a fever
Take it from me

Up in Montana they work all day
In the meat plants they slave away
The Navy's devotin'
No Hospital boatin'
Docked in the bay

Out there all the folks is happy
Like hot dogs snug in their roll
The old in a home ain't happy
They sad 'cause they got a cold
But folks on the phone are lucky
on a cruise you have a worser fate
One day everyones sickly
eatin off the same ol' plates

In quarantine
In quarantine
Nobody beat us
We jus breathed dust
Stuff we can't see

Its the old folks who are on the hook
Lots of food for the young to cook
They got no troubles
Life is all bubbles
In quarantine (out on the beach)
In quarantine
Since life is sweet here
We got the beat here
Naturally (Naturally)

Even the doctor and the nurse
They get the surge an ride the hearse
We got the spirit
You got to hear it
Above the streets

Yeah, In quarantine
In Quarantine
playin the B ball
life is in free fall.
In Quarantine

The mail man can play
The grocers on strings
The krauts rockin' out
The agent she sings
The spanic and the black
They know where it's at
An' oh that trumpet blow

Yeah, In quarantine
In quarantine
When the projects
Begin the concert
It's music to me (It's music to me)
What do they got? A Stienway grand?
We got a hot apartment house band
Each little fam here
Know how to jam here
In quarantine
Each little bug here
Cuttin' a rug here
In quarantine
Each giant whale here
Know how to wail here
That's why it's better
Under the weather
Ya not much luck here
Stuck in New York here
in quarantine

08 May 20 - 11:28 AM (#4051233)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In quarantine, in quarantine
No one can hear you if you scream
In quarantine.

So don't fall down,
Don't bang your head,
Above all else don't fall down dead,
In quarantine.
--"Songs For Quarantine", 1768 or thereabouts

09 May 20 - 09:41 AM (#4051409)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I was quarantined once before, in my youth. Even my mother wouldn't come in the room, but simply threw some broth or a hard crust of bread in my direction. The doctor used a 25 foot long stethoscope to examine me. But to the amazement of everyone I survived. I owe it all to a life of dissipation and overindulgence before I was five which hardened my constitution against the diseases of childhood.

09 May 20 - 12:36 PM (#4051455)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Oh yeah? I betcha I was sicker than you. I had measles and chickenpox at the same time. A 107 fever is recoverable. You wouldn't recover all your brain cells but you could still be a congressman.

09 May 20 - 02:12 PM (#4051476)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Anyone can but Nobody knows and Somebody should do some thing.

09 May 20 - 02:20 PM (#4051480)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

My MOM complained that the four of us never got sick all at once, so there was one year when a lot of stuff was going around and she'd have a month's worth of sick kids (averaging a week of school lost per kid) at a time. That's tough even when she was a stay-at-home mom at the time.

09 May 20 - 02:30 PM (#4051483)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

btw There is now room for the next generation Lithium battery that can not overheat, burn or explode and can use poly chain molecules that bypass the use of all precious metals on the cheap for every current use and beyond.

Adding these two innovations will make someone a billionaire.
I just hope it won't be a robber baron.

One would need those 2 innovations and an army of lawyers of course.

09 May 20 - 02:57 PM (#4051488)
Subject: RE: MOST - Mother of some truth [annex]
From: Donuel

The 1st innovation is from an American woman and the second is from 2 guys in Europe. Needless to say they have never met each other but thats how fortunes are made by knowledgable 3rd parties.

09 May 20 - 09:51 PM (#4051544)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

8.

09 May 20 - 09:51 PM (#4051545)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

9.

09 May 20 - 09:52 PM (#4051547)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

900!!

10 May 20 - 08:21 AM (#4051596)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Happy Birthday

11 May 20 - 06:14 PM (#4051875)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Feeling the need for stimulus, I just tried to find where the IRS is ending my stimulus check (ends Wednesday). I put in my 2019 income tax info, I put in everything they wanted. Twice it came back as "does not match the records in our files". On the third try it said that I'd exceeded my allowance of tries for the day and to come back in 24 hours.

I'm stimulated, all right.

12 May 20 - 09:18 AM (#4052010)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It's a jungle out there
People sowin confusion everywhere
No one one seems to care, well I do HEY
who's in charge here?

It's a jungle out there
Poison in the very air we breathe
You know whats in the water that you drink
Well I do, its ..so.. crazy
People think I'm crazy that I worry all the time
If you paid attention you'd be worried too
You better pay attention or this world we love so much

Might.. Just.. Kill You

I could be wrong now......But I don't think so

Cuz there's a jungle out there
It's a jungle out there

Randy Newman

12 May 20 - 10:18 AM (#4052033)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

No judgements here but if You reealy need stimulus $ you have to do it the American way.
Go to the dark web and buy 100 SS numbers for $5. File all 100 numbers for stimulus $ with your change of address info. You will average about 3-5% of stimulus checks.

You will get other people's stimulus $ , which is probably what happened to you.

13 May 20 - 07:35 AM (#4052199)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In just 3 hours and 25 minutes the cast comes off. I hope the troupe doesn't mind being between engagements again.

13 May 20 - 07:49 AM (#4052204)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

This may the chance of a lifetime for Donuel DeNiro.
The show must go on.

13 May 20 - 08:01 AM (#4052210)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Power outages all morning. I better order chargers while I can.

13 May 20 - 09:43 PM (#4052345)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The cast is off. The thumb looks like I have ichthyosis with a 2.5 inch scar down the middle of it.

There is no charger shortage. It is a plot by George Gates and Bill Soros and the Cock Brothers to bring about a newish world order with the Illuminati in control. You will soon be kowtowing to anyone who can correctly pronounce "Chwyrligwgan" because the NishWO will be based in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch so you can't get a ticket to go there.

14 May 20 - 12:41 AM (#4052362)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Scars are us this year at the MOAB. The six-inch scar down the middle of my knee is coming along.

14 May 20 - 01:11 AM (#4052367)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Well as you know there is a war on. The Corporal just brought in some pancake bisquits and fresh unknown leaf tea. The self isolation in our unit is pretty severe since we don't even allow eye contact.
Sgt. Felix Shadwell still has a cast on his left hand but manages guitar quite well with 2 fingers still exposed and can play most chords by applying his one front tooth on the E string. Playing revelie on a halting guitar is not good for morale but its better than nothing.

After breakfast I ordered Steve Shaw to be washed and brought to my tent for interrogation. We are planning a scouting expedition to a store alledged to have supplies. With any luck the intelligence will end with a raiding party that might even find electricity to charge our devices. We've been using induction charging by rubbing a balloon on our hair and touching the phone. We're running out of balloons and need more but Shadwell discovered inflated condoms work even better.

14 May 20 - 10:07 AM (#4052440)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

From a physical standpoint, 2020 has been a relatively injury and trauma free year for me. But I'm going to buy a couple of new outdoor tools today and 2020 still has 231 pays to catch up.

14 May 20 - 11:51 AM (#4052455)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Wood chippers and chain saws are the way to go.
Weed whackers and hedge trimmers are for wimps.

14 May 20 - 12:25 PM (#4052457)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

'231 pays'
I recognize p as an upside down backwards d. My mancave has 2 large mirrors at right angles to allow views from 4 different couch/body positions, 2 of which are backward and demands a D'Vinci like ability to read backwards. Reading backwards is no problem but words over 7 letters are still time consuming.

Using double prismatic goggles will allow an upside down backward visual field which makes using power tools far more exciting.

Have fun.

14 May 20 - 12:26 PM (#4052458)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think the trauma this year is psychic and is huge; for real serendipity you can't go wrong with a double-headed axe, though power tools can be epic. Consider Robert Frost's Out, out–. I read that one to my kids a number of times as we worked our way through Frost poetry collections at bedtime (we read at bedtime until they were in high school; that would have been the thing of nightmares for small children.)

14 May 20 - 03:36 PM (#4052497)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mr. Wagner was more round than tall and had a backyard as steep as 45 degrees. He labored at digging a double terrace. When he got older he decided to use extra long railroad ties to trim the vertical earth that wanted to give way. He should have used stone but railroad ties seemed better. The work was harder the older he got and he liked his beer.
By the time he finished he had handcut and fit nearly 50 rail road ties.
He averaged one lost finger every five rail road ties since the saw would bind and surprise him. Today the job is done and Mr. Wagner has his thumbs and one finger.
The moral of this story is that perspiration and perseverence
is foolish when it becomes severence, go finger.

14 May 20 - 04:54 PM (#4052507)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Is there severance pay?

14 May 20 - 05:55 PM (#4052513)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

When I took a wood shop class in high school, I learned that the tool responsible for the most injuries is not the table saw or the band saw or the lathe, but the wood chisel. Everyone thinks it's simple and safe so they get careless.

15 May 20 - 01:27 PM (#4052634)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

So Stilly used to entertain her kids with poems about children who died after chopping their hands off. And nobody ever called Child Protective Services?

15 May 20 - 04:21 PM (#4052655)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My mother read us

The little toy dog is covered with dust,
    But sturdy and staunch he stands;
The little toy soldier is red with rust,
    And his musket molds in his hands.
Time was when the little toy dog was new
    And the soldier was passing fair;
And that was the time when our Little Boy Blue
    Kissed them and put them there.

“Now, don’t you go till I come,” he said,
    “And don’t you make any noise!”
So, toddling off to his trundle-bed,
    He dreamed of the pretty toys;
And as he was dreaming, an angel song
    Awakened our Little Boy Blue —
Oh! the years are many, the years are long,
    But the little toy friends are true!

Aye, faithful to Little Boy Blue they stand,
    Each in the same old place —
Awaiting the touch of a little hand,
    And the smile of a little face;
And they wonder, as waiting these long years through
    In the dust of that little chair,
What has become of our Little Boy Blue
    Since he kissed them and put them there.

15 May 20 - 04:23 PM (#4052657)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And also

Little Orphant Annie's come to our house to stay,
An' wash the cups and saucers up, an' brush the crumbs away,
An' shoo the chickens off the porch, an' dust the hearth, an' sweep,
An' make the fire, an' bake the bread, an* earn her board-an'-keep;
An' all us other children, when the supper things is done,
We set around the kitchen fire an' has the mostest fun
A-list'nin' to the witch-tales 'at Annie tells about,
An' the Gobble-uns 'at gits you
?Ef you
?Don't
?Watch
?Out!

Onc't they was a little boy wouldn't say his pray'rs—
An' when he went to bed at night, away up-stairs,
His mammy heerd him holler, an' his daddy heerd him bawl,
An' when they turn't the kivvers down, he wasn't there at all!
An' they seeked him in the rafter-room, an* cubby-hole, an' press,
An' seeked him up the chimbly flue, an' ever'wheres, I guess;
But all they ever found was thist his pants an' roundabout!
An' the Gobble-uns'll git you
?Ef you
?Don't
?Watch
?Out!

An' one time a little girl 'ud allus laugh an' grin,
An' make fun of ever' one, an' all her blood-an'-kin;
An' onc't when they was "company," an' ole folks was there,
She mocked 'em an' shocked 'em, an' said she didn't care!
An' thist as she kicked her heels, an' turn't to run an' hide,
They was two great big Black Things a-standin' by her side,
An' they snatched her through the ceilin' 'fore she knowed what she's about!
An' the Gobble-uns'll git you
?Ef you
?Don't
?Watch
?Out!

An' little Orphant Annie says, when the blaze is blue,
An' the lamp wick sputters, an' the wind goes woo-oo!
An' you hear the crickets quit, an' the moon is gray,
An' the lightnin'-bugs in dew is all squenched away,
You better mind yer parents, an' yer teachers fond an' dear,
An' churish them 'at loves you, an' dry the orphant's tear,
An' he'p the pore an' needy ones 'at clusters all about,
Er the Gobble-uns'll git you
?Ef you
?Don't
?Watch
?Out!

15 May 20 - 04:28 PM (#4052658)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

Some of the sibs have excessively morbid taste in children's reading matter!

15 May 20 - 05:30 PM (#4052666)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Ah! With the first three words the song popped into my head. I can't read it without singing. Eugene Field, Little Boy Blue - that was one of my favorite songs that my father sang. He also put another Field poem to music, "The Little Peach." That one was a little more sinister.

Folk songs are full of love, violence, gore, murder, drama . . . I'm sure it's why I have a great love of murder mysteries now. :)

15 May 20 - 08:50 PM (#4052686)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A LITTLE peach in the orchard grew,—
A little peach of emerald hue;
Warmed by the sun and wet by the dew,
                   It grew.

One day, passing that orchard through,
That little peach dawned on the view
Of Johnny Jones and his sister Sue—
                   Them two.

Up at that peach a club they threw—
Down from the stem on which it grew
Fell that peach of emerald hue.
                   Mon Dieu!

John took a bite and Sue a chew,
And then the trouble began to brew,—
Trouble the doctor could n't subdue.
                   Too true!

Under the turf where the daisies grew
They planted John and his sister Sue,
And their little souls to the angels flew,—
                   Boo hoo!

What of that peach of the emerald hue,
Warmed by the sun, and wet by the dew?
Ah, well, its mission on earth is through.
                   Adieu!

15 May 20 - 09:02 PM (#4052688)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We Are Seven
By William Wordsworth
———A simple Child,
That lightly draws its breath,
And feels its life in every limb,
What should it know of death?

I met a little cottage Girl:
She was eight years old, she said;
Her hair was thick with many a curl
That clustered round her head.

She had a rustic, woodland air,
And she was wildly clad:
Her eyes were fair, and very fair;
—Her beauty made me glad.

“Sisters and brothers, little Maid,
How many may you be?”
“How many? Seven in all,” she said,
And wondering looked at me.

“And where are they? I pray you tell.”
She answered, “Seven are we;
And two of us at Conway dwell,
And two are gone to sea.

“Two of us in the church-yard lie,
My sister and my brother;
And, in the church-yard cottage, I
Dwell near them with my mother.”

“You say that two at Conway dwell,
And two are gone to sea,
Yet ye are seven! I pray you tell,
Sweet Maid, how this may be.”

Then did the little Maid reply,
“Seven boys and girls are we;
Two of us in the church-yard lie,
Beneath the church-yard tree.”

“You run about, my little Maid,
Your limbs they are alive;
If two are in the church-yard laid,
Then ye are only five.”

“Their graves are green, they may be seen,”
The little Maid replied,
“Twelve steps or more from my mother’s door,
And they are side by side.

“My stockings there I often knit,
My kerchief there I hem;
And there upon the ground I sit,
And sing a song to them.

“And often after sun-set, Sir,
When it is light and fair,
I take my little porringer,
And eat my supper there.

“The first that died was sister Jane;
In bed she moaning lay,
Till God released her of her pain;
And then she went away.

“So in the church-yard she was laid;
And, when the grass was dry,
Together round her grave we played,
My brother John and I.

“And when the ground was white with snow,
And I could run and slide,
My brother John was forced to go,
And he lies by her side.”

“How many are you, then,” said I,
“If they two are in heaven?”
Quick was the little Maid’s reply,
“O Master! we are seven.”

“But they are dead; those two are dead!
Their spirits are in heaven!”
’Twas throwing words away; for still
The little Maid would have her will,
And said, “Nay, we are seven!”

16 May 20 - 02:28 AM (#4052697)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Babes in the Wood - that one always got me. The Wicked Mother - is that the one who stabbed her babies and sees their ghosts? Oops - this is becoming a nostalgic music thread.

16 May 20 - 07:03 AM (#4052724)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

"Dead Babies" - Alice Cooper

Little Betty ate a pound of aspirin
She got them from the shelf upon the wall
Betty's mommy wasn't there to save her
She didn't hear, hear her little baby call

Dead babies can't take care of themselves
Dead babies can't take things off the shelf
Well, we didn't want you anyway
Lalala-lalalalalala-la

Daddy is an agrophile in Texas
Mommy's on the bar most every night
Little Betty's sleeping in the graveyard
Living there in burgundy and white

Dead babies can't take care of themselves
Dead babies can't take things off the shelf
Well, we didn't love you anyway
Lalala-lalalalalala-la

Goodbye little Betty
Goodbye little Betty
So long little Betty
So long little Betty
Betty, so long

Dead babies can't take care of themselves
Dead babies can't take things off the shelf
Well, we didn't need you anyway
Lalala-lalalalalala-la

Goodbye little Betty

16 May 20 - 12:59 PM (#4052799)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Don, I moved your interesting remark about your vaccine experience to the vaccine watch thread.

16 May 20 - 02:17 PM (#4052824)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I remember how my girl friend Linda found me and was more upset than me. I was more surprised than upset.
2% of medications are vaccines compared with all other drugs.
That may temporarily change soon.
Internet nuts like Jenny McCarthy are so anti vaccine I just didn't want to besmerch vaccines in any way, but rushing to a vaccine is a lesson well learned now.

16 May 20 - 09:46 PM (#4052901)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Father, dear Father, come home with me now;
The clock in the steeple strikes one.
You said you were coming right home from the shop,
As soon as your day's work was done.
The fire is all out, the house is all dark,
And Mother's been watching since tea,
With poor little Benny so sick in her arms,
And no one to help her but me.

Chorus: Come home, come home, come home;
Please, Father, dear Father, come home.

Father, dear Father, come home with me now;
The clock in the steeple strikes two.
The night has grown colder and Benny is worse,
But he has been calling for you.
Indeed, he is worse; Ma says he will die,
Perhaps before morning shall dawn,
And this is the message she sent me to bring:
Please, Father, dear Father, come home.

Father, dear Father, come home with me now;
The clock in the steep strikes three.
The house is so lonely, the hours are so long,
For poor weeping Mother and me.
Yes, we are alone; poor Benny is dead
And gone with the angels of light.
And these are the very last words that he said:
"I want to kiss Papa goodnight."

(Chorus)

16 May 20 - 09:48 PM (#4052903)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My father is a drunkard,
My mother, she is dead;
And I am just an orphan child,
No place to lay my head;
All through this world I wander,
They drive me from their door,
Some day I'll find a welcome
On Heaven's golden shore.

Now if to me you'll listen,
I'll tell my story sad;
How drinking rum and gambling
Hell Has stole away my dad;
My mother is in heaven,
Where God and the angels smile;
And now I know she's watching
Her lonely orphan child.

We all were once so happy,
And had a happy home;
Till dad, he went to drinking rum,
And then he gambled some;
He left my darling mother,
She died of a broken heart;
And as I tell my story,
I see your tear-drops start.

Don't weep for me and mother,
although' I know 'tis said;
But try to get someone to cheer
And save my poor lonely dad;
"I'm awful cold and hungry,"
She closed her eyes and sighed;
Then those who heard her story,
Knew the orphan child has died.

16 May 20 - 09:50 PM (#4052904)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm alone, all alone, my friends all have fled
My father's a drunkard, my mother is dead.
I'm a poor little girl, I wonder and weep
For the voice of my mother to sing me to sleep.
She sleeps on the hill, in a bed made of clay
How cold it did seem to lay mother away.
She's gone with the angels, and none do I see
So dear as the face of my mother to me.

cho: I'm a little lone girl in this cold world so wild,
God look down and pity the drunkard's lone child.
Look down and pity, Oh soon come to me
Take me to dwell with mother and Thee.

We were so happy till father drank rum;
Then aII our sorrows and troubles begun.
Mother grew paler and wept every day;
Baby and I were too hungry to pIay.
SIowIy they faded and one summer night
Found their sweet faces aIl silent and white
And with big tears sIowIy dropping I said,
"Father's a drunkard and mother is dead."

Oh, if some temperance workers could find
Poor wretched father and speak very kind,
If they could stop him from drinking, why then,
I would feel very happy again.
Is it too Iate? Men of temperance, please try,
For poor littIe Bessie will soon starve and die.
All day Iong I've been begging for bread.
Father's a drunkard and mother is dead.

16 May 20 - 11:26 PM (#4052913)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Well, since the theme seems to have shifted from dead children to orphaned children....

And I actually sing this one.

EVERY BUSH AND TREE

I was born in old Missouri.
My family they were poor.
My mother's name was Laura
And daddy his name was Joe.

Mama called me to her bedside
Saying, "Son, I've got to go.
But we'll meet again up yonder
Where the parting will be no more."

I hear the soft wind creepin'
Through every bush and tree.
I know my mother's waiting
In her heavenly home for me.

Now, Daddy moved back home to North Fork
And he left us here all alone.
And the sheriff came by one evening
And he took us to an orphan's home.

So come all you orphan children,
Who's left down here below,
We'll go and meet our mothers
Where the parting will be no more.

I hear the soft wind creepin'
Through every bush and tree.
I know my mother's waiting
In her heavenly home for me.

17 May 20 - 02:16 AM (#4052930)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Geez. Keep this up and someone will push this thread up above the line. :-)

17 May 20 - 01:59 PM (#4053125)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

No! We can't let Mom be pushed upstairs! It's too dangerous! She might have one of her "fainting spells" and fall down the stairs. You know the "spells" I'm talking about, right? The ones that sometimes afflict Mom somewhere between the second and third empty gin bottle.

17 May 20 - 09:54 PM (#4053196)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

She would have a hard time with the altitude, start breathing heavily, and we all know what happens next. Right! Someone calls the ambulance and she tests positive and...and...we're never told what she's positive for. Then we go see the lawyer (Taker, Monee, and Runne, Attorneys at Law) and go through that who rigamarole about getting her out of the "Hospital" again.

18 May 20 - 08:36 AM (#4053288)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We are arriving at 100,000 deaths a month early on June 1st.
Thats a third of all the corona deaths in the world.
WHY?
By Presidential order 29 states are reopening and no mask is a symbol of bravery and Freedom. The CDC has been cut and fired into oblivion.
The WHO had been defunded by the USA.
The pandemic has been declared a hoax and now its all Obama's fault.
Fox news says take the RED pill like in the Matrix and that the only problem we have is a lockdown by Democrats.

When a virus has an R value of 3 and a third of the country exposes themselves, the rates can only climb. People believe they are bigger than a virus and they would be foolishly RIGHT.

18 May 20 - 09:01 AM (#4053295)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

[Verse 1]
I've got it man, it holds my breath down
What goes around really goes around
I walk alone, my days are still good
But I still can't breathe the way I should

[Chorus]
This is the loneliest disease
I've got the loneliest disease
Ah, ah, ah
I don't like who I've become
It is hard to take or keep my breath
Ah, ah, ah
Lonely disease, loneliest death

[Verse 2]
When I try, I try my best
I know I would not expect anything less
I do myself up, make sure I look good
I wait to get better but not as good as it should

[Chorus]
This is the loneliest disease
I've got the loneliest disease
Ah, ah, ah
I don't like who I've become
It is hard to take or keep my breath
Ah, ah, ah
Lonely disease, loneliest death

18 May 20 - 08:18 PM (#4053424)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Best song to empty a room!

18 May 20 - 08:29 PM (#4053428)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Verse 1
Uh huh it's the plague
Gonna kill you in a few days
A pandemic so severe
The Black Death Caused such horror and fear
And there ain't no cure for that girl
You'll be dead in no time flat girl
You'll get acral necrosis
From the Yersinia Pestis
And it makes your tongue all black girl
Gonna bury out in back girl

Hook
Ooh, Fleas on rats (X5)

Verse 2
Started in China, don't know how
But the Mongols used Biological Warfare
At Kaffa hurled the Italians at Geonesse
The Italians fled back to Sicily
And in 1347
The Black Death said hello to Europe
In infected fleas
From port cities along trade roads
Buboes swelling in the nodes
And it spread real fast like that girl
Better flee when you see a rat girl
People livin for the now, bro
Like that Book by Boccaccio
Oh you could be a [?] girl

[Hook]
Ooh, Fleas on rats (X5)

Verse 3
5 kilometers a day
And in 5 years
Killed two-thirds of the population
Some blamed the lepers or Jews
Did they poison the wells?
It led to peasant revolts
Loss of faith
And some serious persecution
People carried out patches of herbs
to protect them from the smell
Doctor's didn't know what caused it
Bolt your door if your family's afflicted
Bodies in the cart girl
Skeletons in the art girl
But the decreased population
led to amelioration
Of the peasant folk, hey
they could ask for more pay

[Hook]
Ooh, Fleas on rats (X5)

Verse 4
Let me hear you say
This plague is bubonic
B-U-B-O-N-I-C
This plague is bubonic
B-U-B-O-N-I-C
This plague is bubonic
B-U-B-O-N-I-C
This plague is bubonic
B-U-B-O-N-I-C
A pandemic so severe
The Black Death Caused such horror and fear
And there ain't no cure for that girl
You'll be dead in no time flat girl
You'll get acral necrosis
From the Yersinia Pestis
And it makes your tongue all black girl
Gonna bury out in back girl

[Hook]
Ooh, Fleas on rats (X5)

18 May 20 - 11:38 PM (#4053463)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Well, damn. MOM took a bottle of single malt Scotch and a glass and stomped out onto the screened in porch to rock on the glider and think about Micca. RIP, little big man.

19 May 20 - 07:28 AM (#4053576)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Covid 19 in quarantine is a silent disease
Bubonic victims screamed loudly right before death

In quarantine, in quarantine
Everyone hears you when you scream.
With BUBONIC your screams are moronic
In Quarantine

You will fall down now.
and bang your head now.
When the buboes swell,
The pain is worse than hell

In quarantine people did scream.
Its an extreme dream
it burned worse than streamed steam
In quarantine

19 May 20 - 11:26 AM (#4053645)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Anyone name "Michael" is taken immediately to the heaven of his or her own choice. This is in the Bible, the Quran, the Baghavid Gita, the saying of the Buddha, and every other relevant source of spiritual and secular literature. It's even found (go on, look for it!) in Teschi's Mathematical Methods in Quantum Mechanics with Applications to Schrödinger Operators.

19 May 20 - 01:02 PM (#4053686)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2019/11/18/bubonic-plague-inner-mongolia/

19 May 20 - 09:00 PM (#4053793)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

So? Do you think that no contagious disease threatens first-world countries?

20 May 20 - 10:14 AM (#4053913)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We currently have a hemmorragic epidemic in the US that only wild rabbits die from.
In the US we are more likely to get a touch of the plague by contact and not fleas. Penacilain allows a quick cure, most of the time.

Like Trump I'm not a doctor but I stayed in a Holiday Inn.

20 May 20 - 10:24 AM (#4053917)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

TB or not TB

20 May 20 - 12:55 PM (#4053967)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

I wish there was a "Like" button, but, alas, my mouse would die from exhaustion.

20 May 20 - 01:02 PM (#4053972)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I heard on one of the MSNBC programs last night that because of the social distancing there are fewer cases of colds and such going around. There are a few rays of sunshine.

20 May 20 - 01:34 PM (#4053986)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

More Solar X rays reach your body and damage your DNA than gamma rays from super novas. They effect our evolution and life span. If we had a red dwarf Sol, our life span could seem immortal in comparison. Aliens from dim planets should also have large eyes but I have never seen one.
Rays of sunshine are a mixed bag.

20 May 20 - 02:11 PM (#4053992)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We have been under attack for quite some time, with Them bombarding us with their ray-weapons. YOU think it's sunshine, but the Idaho Legion knows better. That's why the Secret Space Defense Headquarters is buried in an old copper mine near Inkom. It's camouflaged as the Bannock County Land Fill.

20 May 20 - 03:17 PM (#4054011)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Copper mines are not as mobile as tin foil hats.

Its a sad season for TV's '24'
Jack Baur has virtually died from Coronovirus.
The show may go without him.
This has Donald rethinking masks.

20 May 20 - 03:47 PM (#4054018)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM wants to make a tinfoil helmet and mail it to The Donald. I told her it would clash with the orange he sprays on his face (except for his eyelids, where he puts a couple of little lid covers every morning - and seems to think the world can't tell that's what he's doing?)

20 May 20 - 07:57 PM (#4054056)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've tried readjusting the color on my TV to no avail as the skin around Trump's eyes, where there is no bronzer, keeps turning more blue than the usual pasty white.

Due to his makeup he has always had the opposite look of a raccoon around his eyes but he really looks sick now.

To be fair some others like Nancy Pelosi looks like they are wearing a
mask.

20 May 20 - 08:21 PM (#4054057)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here's a start. And with this he'd never be without that which he so much craves.

20 May 20 - 11:53 PM (#4054076)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Nancy Pelosi on MSNBC tonight was not very well lit or she'd look like her usual self. All of this home reporting means people have various types of light fixtures in the rooms and the color of the light can make a huge difference in the appearance on a broadcast or in photographs.

Good old Archie McPhee. Located in the neighborhood where several family members have resided over the years. Nice area.

21 May 20 - 07:58 AM (#4054140)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My father married a pure Navaho
My people were ashamed where ever we go
The Indians said I was white by law
The White Man always called me "Indian Squaw"
Half-breed, that's all I ever heard
Half-breed, how I learned to hate the word
Half-breed, she's no good they warned
Both sides were against me since the day I was born
We never settled, went from town to town
When you're not welcome you don't hang around
The other children always laughed at me
"Give her a feather, she's Navaho"
Half-breed, that's all I ever heard
Half-breed, how I learned to hate the word
Half-breed, she's no good they warned
Both sides were against me since the day I was born
We weren't accepted and I felt ashamed
Nineteen I left them, tell me who's to blame
My life since then is reservations
But I can't run away from what I am
Half-breed, that's all I ever heard
Half-breed, how I learned to hate the word
Half-breed, she's no good they warned
Both sides were against me since the day I was born
si lence, that's all that I hear
Si lence, cuz the virus killed them all
Si lence, with no intensive care
Now one side's against me till the day that I fall

21 May 20 - 11:19 AM (#4054171)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Did Cher write that (too lazy to look it up . . . )

21 May 20 - 03:46 PM (#4054235)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You know who wrote the lazy beggining and end.
But who wrote the Last Mohawk Tasmainian Navaho CroMagnon Neanderthal?

23 May 20 - 01:13 PM (#4054625)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Poor Mom! All her kids are off having Memorial Day weekend fun and she's sitting here neglected.

No, wait! The kids aren't having fun! There's still a pandemic! They're staying home and being bored!

So, what's their excuse now?

23 May 20 - 05:46 PM (#4054676)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My young son's excuse is that he is the chief moderator of a role playing website.

23 May 20 - 09:35 PM (#4054704)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Just got back from dinner at the gas station.----------------------------------------

23 May 20 - 09:57 PM (#4054706)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [anux]
From: Donuel

There are gems among truck stop oasis.

24 May 20 - 12:55 AM (#4054718)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's easier to get a business loan for a gas station than a restaurant (at least in this part of Texas) so there are a lot of gas stations with quite decent small restaurants inside. It has surprised a few guests when we run by the corner Citgo gas station for gyros.

24 May 20 - 12:46 PM (#4054856)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In my thinking on one end of the grand pendulum of human events and responses, is the compounding of negative magical thinking mistakes like the Children's Crusade or the 3rd Reich, and on the other end are the compounded enlightenment extremes of Realitivity and super inventions and discoveries.

We may be at the extreme right swing of the pendulum or near to it.
Like when we are on a swing this is the time to gain a little boost to the swing down and to the left. I don't know if sticking our legs out or leaning back is what gives us added momentum. Its probably both but we are going to be OK.

Everyone is overdosed with rule by lies and TV hypnosis to the point of rejection. The old tricks are suspect and the new meme begins.
In reality there are many pendulums at different degrees all swinging simultaneously but I think people visualize in 2 dimensions most easily.

I hope we identify the coming time as a new age instead of a post appocolyptic anything. My highly ignored, arrogant sounding, journal of thought droppings work is done. All thats left is repitition or forever unfinished attempts.

24 May 20 - 02:40 PM (#4054879)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The restaurant in question is called Cafe Tuscano and it's one of the best in Idaho (really!). Their food is outstanding and the tiramisu (made there)is literally national-award-winning. Still, taking guests to the Chevron station for a dinner of grilled tri-tip and veggies with an excellent wine/beer selection (and harder stuff) and very tasty desserts isn't in the usual pervue of folks from, say, DC or Chicago.

24 May 20 - 06:39 PM (#4054929)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's a Thai restaurant in Pensacola that shares a building with a car wash. You can enjoy a nice dish of red curry while watching cars go through the wash tunnel.

The cars being washed provide an endless source of distraction, which makes the restaurant a good place to take a dinner companion you plan on ignoring.

24 May 20 - 10:14 PM (#4054951)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Their corn dogs are, at best, okay.

25 May 20 - 08:42 AM (#4055057)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Today shall be fair and 68° F. Later this week it shall continue to be fair and up to 89°F.

Yesterday I put the flower boxes out on the porch. Then I heard it, way up in the air: a duckdog barking away, and never was barking so sad, and never was barking so gay.

25 May 20 - 04:39 PM (#4055151)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Dining on dime
at lunchtime
The last time I was at Horn and Hardart I was much shorter.

25 May 20 - 07:05 PM (#4055165)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I never ate food from an automat. They never really caught on in the South. Probably because cooked grits have a shelf-life of about ten minutes before they turn into a congealed gelatinous mass even a dog won't eat.

25 May 20 - 09:04 PM (#4055175)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Nonsense! I have a lovely recipe for grits souffle (as made at the King's Arms Tavern in Williamsburg, VA). We first had them there:

Waiter: Would you like to try our grits souffle?
THWAP, g.s. on the plate.

It really is very good. And grits with shrimp as made in Charleston, SC -- delicious.

Gator Tail a la Pensacola is pretty terrible, since the gator ain't dead.

25 May 20 - 09:28 PM (#4055177)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The place had such loud austere acoustics like a bathroom. I could peep at a portion of the kitchen through the little glass door resolutely guarding a slice of pie for I was without a dime. Hey buddy can you...

25 May 20 - 10:32 PM (#4055181)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Eating live animals is unique. In the case of a live prawn you can feel it resign its life in your mouth, if you dont hurry it will seemingly come back alive with its last ounce of hope.
Then there is the adrenalized blood of freshly hunted...

excerpt from 'How to Become a Vegan' by Tom Ato

26 May 20 - 10:43 AM (#4055281)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The Art of the Deal (ammended by Michael Cohen

1       Once you have their money... you never give it back.
2       The best deal is the one that brings the most profit.
2       Money is everything.
3       Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
5       Always exaggerate your estimates.
6       Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
7       Keep your ears open.
8       Small print leads to large risk.
9       Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
10       Greed is eternal.
14       The quickest way to find profits is to let them find you.
15       Dead men close no deals
16       A deal is a deal... until a better one comes along.
17       A contract is a contract is a contract.
18       A Deal without profit is no deal at all.
19       Satisfaction is not guaranteed.
20       He who dives under the table today lives to profit tomorrow.
21       Never place friendship above profit.
22       A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
23       Nothing is more important than your health.
27       There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman.
29       What's in it for me?
31       Never make fun of a loser's mother. Insult something he cares about instead.
33       It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
34       War is good for business..
35       Peace is good for business.
37       The early investor reaps the most interest.
39       Don't tell customers more than they need to know.
40       She can touch your dick but never your $.
41       Profit is its own reward.
43       Feed your greed, but not enough to choke it.
44       Never confuse wisdom with luck.
45       Expand or die
47       Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.
48       The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
52       Never ask when you can take
53       Never trust anybody taller than you.
54       Rate divided by time equals profit.
55       Take joy from profit, and profit from joy.
57       Good customers are as rare as bearer bond—treasure
58       There is no substitute for success.
59       Free advice is seldom cheap.
60       Keep your lies consistent or for 2 weeks or not..
62       The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
63       Work is the best therapy-at least for your employees.
65       Win or lose, there's always Huyperian beetle snuff.
66       Someone's always got bigger debts.
68       Risk doesn't always equal reward.
69       Trumps are not responsible for the stupidity of other races.
74       Knowledge equals profit.
75       Home is where the resort is.
76       Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies.
77       If you break it, I'll charge you for it!
82       The flimsier the product, the higher the price.
85       Never let the competition know what you're thinking.
87       Learn the customer's weaknesses, so that you can better take advantage of him
88       It ain't over 'til its over'
88       Vengeance will cost you everything.
89       Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits.
89       [It is] better to lose some profit and live than lose all profit and die.
92       There are many paths to profit.
94       Females and finances don't mix.
95       Expand or die.
97       Enough... is never enough.
98       Every man has his price
98       If you can't take it with you, don't go.
99       Trust is the biggest liability of all.
100       When it's good for business, tell the truth.
101       Profit trumps emotion.       The Long Mirage
102       Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever.
103       Sleep can interfere with opportunity
104       Faith moves mountains... of inventory.
106       There is no honor in peverts
108       Hope doesn't keep the lights on.
108       A woman wearing clothes is like a man without any profits.
109       Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.
110       Exploitation begins at home.
111       Treat people in your debt like family... exploit them.
112       Never have sex with the wife's sister.
113       Always have sex with the boss.
117       You can't free a fish from water
121       Everything is for sale, even friendship.
123       Even a blind man can recognize the glow of gold
125       You can't make a deal if you're dead.
135       Listen to secrets, but never repeat them.
139       Wives serve, brothers inherit.
141       Only fools pay retail.
144       There's nothing wrong with charity... as long as it winds up in your pocket.
147       People love the bartender.
151       Even when you're a customer, sell yourself.
153       Sell the sizzle, not the steak
162       Even in the worst of times someone turns a profit
168       Whisper your way to success.
177       Know your enemies... but do business with them always.
181       Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.
182       When life hands you grease, make detergent
184       A Trump waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves.
188       Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.
189       Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money.
190       Hear all, trust nothing.
192       Never cheat an Arab unless you're sure you can get away with it.
193       Trouble comes in threes.
193       It's never too late to fire the staff.
194       It's always good business to know about new customers
199       Location, location, location.
200       A Trump chooses no side but his own
202       Suckers are succulent, but sometimes they bite back
208       Sometimes, the only thing more dangerous than a ? is an answer.
211       Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success. Don't hesitate to step on them.
212       A good lie is easier to believe than the truth.
214       Never begin a (business) negotiation on an empty stomach.
216       Never gamble with a telepath.
217       Always know what you're buying.
218       Sometimes what you get free costs entirely too much.
219       Possession is eleven-tenths of the law!
223       Beware the man who doesn't take time for blackmail
227       If that's what's written, then that's what's written.
229       Gold lasts longer than lust.
235       Duck; death is head high
236       You can buy fate with enough hate
239       Never be afraid to label a product Trump.
240       Time, like platinum, is a highly limited commodity.
242       More is good... all is better
243       Always leave yourself an out.
248       The definition of insanity is trying the same failed scheme & expecting different results
255       A wife is luxury... a smart accountant a neccessity.
257       When the messenger comes to appropriate your profits, kill the messenger
261       A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience
263       Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for gold
266       When in doubt, lie.
267       If you believe it, they believe it.
272       Always inspect the merchandise before making a deal.
280       If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
284       Deep down, everyone's bought.
285       No good deed ever goes unpunished
287       Always get somebody else to do the lifting
288       Never get into anything that you can't get out of
289       A man is only worth the sum of his possessions.
290       An angry man is an enemy, and a satisfied man is an ally.
291       The less employees know about the cash flow, the smaller the share they can demand.
292       Betrayal can be fired - the same as loyalty
293       The more time they take deciding, the more money they will spend.
294       A bargain usually isn't
431       When the shooting starts, let the mercenaries handle it!
432       To retalliate and defeat - humilliate by a tweet

ALWAYS SUE THE BASTARDS

26 May 20 - 11:12 PM (#4055398)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Day-old grits and that Eye-talian polenta stuff are pretty much one and the same. Except that polenta's expensive and day-old grits are damned near free.

27 May 20 - 12:29 AM (#4055401)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm not a fan of grits, though I make cornbread from cornmeal a couple of times a year. I use most cornmeal in the garden. Corn gluten meal can impede weed growth if you put it out in the winter before they sprout, or sprinkle it on the bare soil you've just weeded before putting in bedding plants. That bright yellow looks pretty alarming, though, so put mulch over the top of it.

27 May 20 - 04:57 AM (#4055425)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

"impedes weed growth" ? Who needs poisons like Round UP?

Grits (corn meal gluten) and weed control sounds like an organic dream

To me grits as a food is right up there with corn silk spaggetti..

27 May 20 - 07:55 AM (#4055451)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygdB-ZE0daY

27 May 20 - 09:35 PM (#4055552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Grits, well prepared (most aren't), are pretty good. Polenta is just a fancy name for corn meal mush solid enough to fry. Now, for good eating try panhaus (a/k/a scrapple, but with a twist).

27 May 20 - 09:50 PM (#4055556)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

My orthopedic guy says my knee is looking good, three months out from the surgery. I'm glad I did it, but it is one rough surgery to get over. In lieu of physical therapy, I'm mowing the lawn and walking dogs. His parting shot was "if you want to mow some more, I'll give you my address." I happen to know he has two Labrador retrievers, so if his lawn is like mine, there are some hazards out there. I think I'll pass. My routine is to scoop every day or two and dump it into the compost, then I've started bagging at least some of the grass when I mow so I can toss it on top of the droppings. That's the best poop deodorizer around.

28 May 20 - 06:37 AM (#4055597)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In a year you will have absolute maximum bone growth gripping the new implant so skydiving should be OK. What stimulates bone growth mechanicly is simple 'impact' like jumping/stomping from one stair down to the floor many times. Its the shock, not the load.

Lateral/horizontal shock - not good. Do not high dive above 10 meters

28 May 20 - 09:39 AM (#4055626)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Hard to get over: arthredesis of the left thumb. You never know how much you use your left thumb until it doesn't work as it always did before.

28 May 20 - 01:36 PM (#4055660)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Fusion? - Range of motion, different angle, pain?

28 May 20 - 08:30 PM (#4055737)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

All of the above. Hand therapy and exercises to regain as much range of motion, etc. as possible (and they say I'm doing very well!). Pain? Well, yes -- the bone is growing over the screws.

Yes, I endured the thumbscrews. But I never broke! I never told them!

28 May 20 - 09:19 PM (#4055741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Your brain devotes more brain area (sensory and motor) to a thumb than all the rest of your fingers. Thats why thumbscrews are such an effective torture. You can even render a person unconscious with a clever blow to the thumb.
I'm not a doctor but I play one on TV.
Neurologicly speaking, after your thumbs comes your tongue and your
___
o
The eyes are king of all brain resources

29 May 20 - 10:21 AM (#4055830)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I fell into a tiny crack below the line.
All I have is the conscience of the folk singer
I can not play and sing at the same time.
I only have the talent to make a string sing or
combine songs in a strange and clever way
The envy I feel for performers is what remains

I wonder if it was a 107 fever or skull fracture.
I'd love to be able to sing out, I wish I could
I tried for 50 years but never found that feature.
In this sea of outrage I say whats misunderstood
as fake prestigue or ethics of an age gone by
What defines this age is instead the great lie.

All I have is science with a conscience of folksingers
It may be of some value or a total waste of time
Its a weird combination that probably won't injure
At any rate in my thinking its no great crime.
I've done all the talking about ability and disability
We all have unique mixtures. What about you until lately?

29 May 20 - 09:33 PM (#4055920)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]o
From: Rapparee

I just added five more books on American and other pandemics, past and future, to the collection. Now I must read them and others to prepare for a delivering a lecture on the subject in October. Two things in common, from 1793 to the present: business folks think epidemics/pandemics are bad for business and prefer doctors didn't mention them, and all of these diseases are products of The Lower Classes (who live dissolute lives of intemperance). They are also punishments by God for said lives (see above) and it'll only get worse if we don't REPENT!.

30 May 20 - 07:01 AM (#4055972)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I'm sorry, but I cannot repent. I have never pented in the first place.

At least, that is, to the best of my knowledge. Since I don't actually know what penting is, I suppose it's possible I have pented at some time in the past without being aware of doing so. But if that's the case, if penting is so unremarkable that one can do it without knowledge of doing so, then why should I go through the trouble of doing it again?

30 May 20 - 07:20 AM (#4055975)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

REPENSE The End is Near

30 May 20 - 05:18 PM (#4056109)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Yep sure nuf comrads - This really is the end !

30 May 20 - 05:47 PM (#4056112)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Naw, just taking a breather after mowing the front lawn. The back yard can wait till tomorrow. MOM has some good iced tea (no "Long Island" about it this time) and the porch swing looks inviting.

31 May 20 - 08:24 PM (#4056364)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Out here in Idaho we're just cleanin' our guns and checkin' our ammo. Or some of us are. I'm not that stupid and have better things to do, like water flowers and watch golfers.

31 May 20 - 11:23 PM (#4056369)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Speaking of cleaning guns and checking ammo, the battery to the combination keypad on my gun safe died. There's an emergency access key around here somewhere, but I'm not sure where. I hope the Zombie Apocalypse can wait until after I find it.

I do have a bunch of 12 Gauge shells that aren't in the gun safe. I suppose that, if push comes to shove, I can make Zombie-killing bombs out of them.

31 May 20 - 11:46 PM (#4056373)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

How are you guys doing for face masks? I suspect Mike is set up with a lifetime supply, what with a house full of quilt stash. How about Bruce? Don? Who else? Keb? Anyone with a particularly large face and/or a beard, let me know. I've made a few for that demographic. :)

01 Jun 20 - 03:15 PM (#4056533)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Well, Stilly, thanks for your generosity, industry, and big heart.
I don't have a beard.
And at the mental health clinic where I admitted myself this year,
we have fellow patients
waiting out the shelter-in-place pandemic order
by making masks as though somebody's life depended on it.
At this point
I suspect we have more masks than patients ...

but thanks again for asking.

01 Jun 20 - 09:14 PM (#4056594)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

This is very strange....

Since I first bought an optical mouse for my laptop some years back, I've been using a piece of white card stock paper as a "mouse pad" instead of mousing on the bare tabletop. Card stock has enough "tooth" that the mouse moves around smoothly and comfortably. A sheet lasts a month or so before it gets dirty and the constant movement of the mouse burnishes the tooth down to where the paper's slick.

I finally got down to my last piece of the card stock I was using so I bought some more today. And guess what? It doesn't work! The shade of white seems to be too "bright" for the mouse's optical sensor. Move the mouse around on it and the cursor stays in one place. Put the old sheet back down, the mouse works fine. Hold the new sheet and the old sheet up for comparison and I can only see the least bit of difference. But that slight difference is enough to make the mouse inoperable. Go figure....

01 Jun 20 - 09:35 PM (#4056596)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If you'd like a real mouse pad let me know. The mouse is still attached to it, so you know it's genuine.

01 Jun 20 - 10:29 PM (#4056601)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Thanks for the offer, but I'll just get some pastel card stock. The optical mouse actually works fine on the bare tabletop, but it's quieter with the card stock.

I remember trying to use a piece of red card stock once and it didn't work either. But, in that case, the reason's obviously that red lasers can't "see" red.

The bright white card stock must be too reflective. Sorta like trying to mouse on a mirror.

01 Jun 20 - 10:30 PM (#4056602)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Which brings us to....

01 Jun 20 - 10:31 PM (#4056603)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

1000!!!

02 Jun 20 - 03:59 AM (#4056620)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You CAD

02 Jun 20 - 05:28 AM (#4056640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For more bang for the buck I have submitted to DARPA my prototype of semi lethal "super ball rubber bullets". Once fired they don't stop bouncing around for 30 seconds. They can go around corners and injure multiple targets in one shot. I got an endorsement from Steven Miller who said I am in the spirit of the Trump Presidency.

02 Jun 20 - 06:13 PM (#4056781)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Load little ones in a 12 gauge shell and bounce all over the place forever.

02 Jun 20 - 09:57 PM (#4056822)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm told the Pentagon is going another direction as in the 82nd Airborn with fixed bayonettes to quell demonstrations of democracy.

03 Jun 20 - 09:53 PM (#4057074)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Bayonets are tools that can split a large crowd into smaller crowds if used correctly. Unfortunately, the US Army no longer teaches the use of the bayonet.

I have today ended three straight days of hand therapy (an hour or so each day, not all at once). Monday is my last day, sayeth the hand therapy place. I am told that they have done all they can for me, and now it's up to me to exercise my left thumb and hand. Wednesday next the surgeon (who retires at the end of the month) will "graduate" me. Now I gotta do all the work. Phooey!

04 Jun 20 - 06:32 AM (#4057134)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

May you stick out like a healed thumb.
Like your lips, the discomfort you feel is disproportionate to the area needing healing and stretching.

04 Jun 20 - 11:34 AM (#4057201)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I clearly see a battlespace that has to be dominated. Brutal force will be required after all this pandemic stress. Perhaps killing millions of
germs will be the key but I gotta clean the downstairs bathroom at long last.

04 Jun 20 - 04:07 PM (#4057268)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think if I round up the copious amount of dog hair around here I'll evict germs at the same time.

04 Jun 20 - 06:05 PM (#4057303)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

dog hair helps coalese meteor dust that collects under the bed.

04 Jun 20 - 07:36 PM (#4057315)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

... mind you get the dog hair under the refrigerator ...

04 Jun 20 - 09:13 PM (#4057328)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Be warned keb, MOAB isn't all moms love, there are fist fights and rough trade in here that could hurt delicate little feelings like yours. Few have the real MOAB password to enter the dark MOAB where folks like you are merely a snack before the great ones become a million different things with a mere incantation and transmogrification. For example 5 years before the election Rap began ressurecting pure evil in the one we know as the Emporer until the decayed flesh of he who is named turnip became President of the USA 5 years later. Who do you think deliberatly made all the evil in the mud hatch out to become Covid 19? If you think you can handle the power of the dark side think again.

04 Jun 20 - 09:22 PM (#4057330)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What would Spaw do?
FUCK YOU

04 Jun 20 - 09:27 PM (#4057331)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Certainly, Donuel, you cannot. That is why the Idaho Legion has sent a special detachment to guard you and your house. You may see them now and then, hovering around you as they lavish protection all over you. Here's a picture of Fat Frank on his last duty assignment -- if you see him, tell him I said hello.

05 Jun 20 - 12:00 AM (#4057340)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Our Legion of foreign wars bartender is named Frankie

05 Jun 20 - 03:05 PM (#4057535)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

hmmm, the dark MOAB on the dark web?

05 Jun 20 - 04:42 PM (#4057562)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Yes but inside a black hole.

05 Jun 20 - 09:44 PM (#4057599)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

To the rescue comes

QUARK!! QUARK!!
QUARK!!

06 Jun 20 - 12:42 AM (#4057604)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The rank and file inside the CDC,FBI,State,CIA and Pentagon would welcome the help of 'quarks' but what have they done for for those loyal to the Constitution lately. Alex Jones types are strangling the engine of society of oxygen. Its choking and were running out of time.
Stupidity and fantasy is clogging the air filters.

06 Jun 20 - 08:14 AM (#4057640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL you could get a couple feet of surge and rainfall till Tue
Comon back good buddy, over...

06 Jun 20 - 09:32 AM (#4057653)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [anusx]
From: Donuel

For years I have repurposed an old church message sign and put it on the corner. It is held up by a real estate post and cross beam.

The first theme was about the diversity of tree leaves in a humorous vein. Now I am making a Star War Themed "Return of the DIVERSE"
This way I avoid any trump image and words like hate or hope.
BLM does appear on the uniforms of the characters.

06 Jun 20 - 02:31 PM (#4057721)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Don, I'm too far inland for storm surge to be a problem. Weather Underground is only predicting about four inches of rain over the next few days where I live (but they've been wrong before). The first real band of storms should be here in about three hours. We'll see how much it dumps and extrapolate from there. At least wind shouldn't be an issue. Top winds are only 50 MPH and they'll be over 100 miles away.

06 Jun 20 - 03:10 PM (#4057733)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

whew, It's a large world afterall.

06 Jun 20 - 03:28 PM (#4057738)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I pay a couple of bucks a year to get Wunderground on my phone without ads. Entirely worth it.

There's just the one right now, no daisy chain of storms across the Atlantic. One wonders if the slowdown in human activity will result in a calmer hurricane year.

06 Jun 20 - 06:12 PM (#4057752)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Do you see the giant cyclone off Terra del Feugo?

06 Jun 20 - 09:47 PM (#4057783)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We just had about an inch of rain in a couple of hours. Winds too, of course. For this area that's a monsoon. Sn*w is predicated for Monday, tomorrow is thunderstorms and a high of about 50. Oddly, there were few golfers late this afternoon.

07 Jun 20 - 11:36 AM (#4057911)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Nice weather we're having

Yes

Shall we silence black journalists

By all means

Shall we say it is for bias

Just do it by any means neccessary

Your turn to tee off.

07 Jun 20 - 08:11 PM (#4058029)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, we're recovering from a hangover of sorts. Yesterday we got the decision from the State Board of Tax Appeals on the 40% assessment increase we were awarded last year. The BTA agreed with us and accepted the figure we proposed. In the process they ripped the Assessor a brand new orifice as they did, we have since found out, in several other decisions. AAAAND this year's assessment is 55% over last year's uncorrected assessment! We're hitting the ol' Appeal Trail agin!

But in the meantime, raise a glass or three!

07 Jun 20 - 08:39 PM (#4058036)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Doesn't any of that freeze when you turn 65?

08 Jun 20 - 09:00 AM (#4058121)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Did Stilly just win your appeal?

Hurricane Gonzalo does not yet exist even as butterfly flutter.
But with a name like GONZO it sounds like a force to be reckoned with.
People couldn't take Katrina seriously but GONZO-holy shit

08 Jun 20 - 09:50 AM (#4058129)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Pseudomartyrs reproduce slumberous superpolymers umbragedociously but plumbiferous suboperculums perjuriously injure the subopular subemployed biopolymers bumptiously in hyperbolic lumberyards. But never the preambulatory currycombed. Dogberryismal doubleplays molybdenous murals with mouldywarps murderously perturbed by polymeridesmerised pyromerides subdermally. Unemployed imperious protestors impetuously disgraced bodysurfers just as Dumbledor's euphorbious and pendulously ponderously heavy testicles are purportedly subproblems. Surprised swordplayers undersupply murmurously musclebound ectomorphs.

translation: Posers superglue 2 by 4's to...

08 Jun 20 - 11:44 AM (#4058167)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I successfully found (after searching the garage several times) and installed a loosely-woven nylon/polyester outdoor tarp (Harbor Freight) on the patio cover so the sun won't beat on the back door so brutally. And with that success, I feel like I must go outside and move some more things around. There is a rain barrel that is full but hasn't been used in ages (it needs a mosquito dunk again) and a bit of the garden that must be dug up or tilled. I could stay put for a while and this urge would pass, but I think I'll act on it today. MOM's just hanging out on the glider on the front porch, waving at cars that pass by.

08 Jun 20 - 03:31 PM (#4058208)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Jire in the wabe.

08 Jun 20 - 09:44 PM (#4058265)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I went to the hand therapist, probably for the last time in this go-round. Wednesday I see the hand surgeon and he will probably tell me, "Get out and don't come back before I retire at the end of June!"

Tomorrow the massage therapist has another crack at my thumb and its scars...after coffee at the Elks Lodge with all of the Old Farts.

No, I did nothing outside. A high of 49F and a low tonight of 39F. There was sn*w, but not here. Only a cold rain and some thunderstorms.

08 Jun 20 - 10:26 PM (#4058272)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I hope you can do octaves on the piano or still play the glass harp

09 Jun 20 - 08:34 PM (#4058487)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

This morning I went to cardiac rehab at the hospital. NO PARKING anywhere except outside the Emergency Room and I can't, in good conscience, part there unless I need to use it. So I didn't get to cardiac rehab.

Why all the parking slots filled? Because the hospital was ribbon-cutting a new link in the "greenway" walking trail around the city. I couldn't go to exercise because of a link for exercise!

10 Jun 20 - 11:15 AM (#4058604)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Irony comes in all shapes and sizes, doesn't it?

I had to cut PT short by several weeks because of the rise of COVID-19, so am hoping scar tissue doesn't become a problem to have to treat later. PT keeps in from forming.

I've fiddled with the computer this week in an attempt to set up a way to capture a film being played on my computer. Darned thing won't let me make a full length mp4 for playing on other devices, it's double layer so it stops encoding about 2/3 of the way through, and you know how it is, once you can't do something you waste time and money trying to prove you can do it. I spent $19 updating the media player in my computer and downloaded a new capture program, when it turns out I could have bought the darned film for $9 on Amazon and they've digitized it.

10 Jun 20 - 09:08 PM (#4058690)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I was today thrown out of hand therapy and the surgeon's office. He probably will never see me again (he's retiring the end of the month). On my "get outa here sheet" he wrote "healed." I wasn't heeled as I see no point to packing heat, but if he said I was I guess I am. Part of the way home I got a call from the hand therapy people that they were cancelling the rest of my appointments. I don't know what I did to offend them.

Oh well.

10 Jun 20 - 09:48 PM (#4058695)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If the doc pads his win loss column he might get a bonus or avoid fines and penalties. Insurance data shows old docs often go past thier prime, besides ya gotta master the parking before you can get a good surgical outcome buddy. Here, the Parking for town sized mega complexs of medical offices, is owned and perniciously abused by the Mafia.

11 Jun 20 - 11:02 PM (#4058869)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here the hospital owns all that parking. Of course, you often can't find even an inconvenient place.

12 Jun 20 - 05:53 PM (#4059016)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7n_RTXJ_LNs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCMCcY710oE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnqC6T4evU4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PU6GAMbqRBE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIU7FsY6Nkc

13 Jun 20 - 04:24 AM (#4059060)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thats fun

13 Jun 20 - 10:07 PM (#4059166)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Three groups of targets this morning, varying ranges, NO MISSES!!!!

15 Jun 20 - 11:08 AM (#4059320)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd...the golfers are back! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uc-W762YwG0

15 Jun 20 - 05:12 PM (#4059381)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You've got a good idea there having target practice at 3 different distances on the golf course, just like drives, chips and putts.
Scheduling could be hazardous.
I like new olympic events like cross country bowling or highway overpass Sumo wrestling.

15 Jun 20 - 06:43 PM (#4059400)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Winter Weather Advisory issued June 15 at 1:13PM MDT until June 17 at 12:00PM MDT by NWS Pocatello ID

* WHAT…Snow expected, mainly above 7000 feet. Total snow
accumulations of 1 to 3 inches with local accumulations of 6
inches or more, including for mountain passes like Willow Creek
Summit and mid and upper slopes.

* WHERE…Mountain elevations mainly above 7,000 feet. Light snow
accumulations below 7,000 feet are possible mainly Wednesday
morning.

* WHEN…From 6 PM Tuesday to noon MDT Wednesday.

* IMPACTS…Plan on slippery road conditions, especially on Willow
Creek Summit. If planning to recreate in these areas, plan on
cold, wintry conditions. Slow down and use caution while traveling.

16 Jun 20 - 12:32 PM (#4059552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's in the 90s here again today, hard to believe this heat hasn't seeped up there and finally warmed things a bit.

I seem to be in a pasta phase right now. I'd better get over it soon or I'll be so round I'll roll out of the house looking like one of these armoniche pastas I've been eating.

16 Jun 20 - 12:44 PM (#4059557)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Be careful with the black ice. Idaho black ice claimed my best friend in his Pinto with the help of a truck years ago - but in the WINTER.

17 Jun 20 - 07:05 AM (#4059678)
Subject: RE: MISSION - Accomplished [annex]
From: Donuel

According to Pence there is no second wave and we should celebrate our victory against the invisible killer. Mask free Eskimo kisses everyone.
Let's all boogaloo and Q up the 4 Chan Muzak.

17 Jun 20 - 08:55 AM (#4059693)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Those calling for violent reaction to change have no idea what they are asking for. From what I have seen they are soldierboy-wannabees with no experience of actual warfare and few are even qualified as trained Chaplain's Assistants. There is no experience there comparable to Marcus Reno's being splattered with the brains of the man next to him in the Greasy Grass fight, or actually killing someone, or smelling the odor of Death sitting in the grass, or even being shot at with intent to kill. Their desires are like those young men of the Confederacy who were fed a line of "defending our rights" and "fighting for the property we gained by honest toil" by wealthy cotton merchants and plantation owners and were "allowed" to die in droves for The Lost Cause. Don't get me started.

17 Jun 20 - 02:19 PM (#4059736)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One thing I don't go for.
Crooks claiming they know more.
They hire kids with patrioti$m
to lay down their lives.

17 Jun 20 - 02:46 PM (#4059737)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Now for something completely different:

Cassowary. Someone needs to gift one to the resident of the oval office.

17 Jun 20 - 06:44 PM (#4059764)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Outside the temperature is -37° K.

17 Jun 20 - 09:25 PM (#4059784)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's been raining frozen methane all day, but since gravity is frozen it's a problem.

18 Jun 20 - 08:55 AM (#4059859)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BRILLIANT
Freezing or slowing down gravity like light is fundamental to FTL and time dialation ! Maybe now we can catch up to the Russians in their rudimentary ventures into limited time travel. (How do you think they they stole the election for Trump) What they are able to do without a trace of forensic evidence is astonishing.

Nowforsomthingdifferent:

Many white guys perform a ritual of going into the woods armed to the teeth to kill an animal, not for survival but for sport. If you ask me its not a fair fight, its not like the animal even has a taser. The hunters patiently track an animal after being alerted to its presence at long last. If the animal surprises the hunter and starts to run they may get off a shot or two and may only hit their prey in the back and exclaim "GOT HIM" . When the hunters come across the carcass they may give it a kick to be sure it is dead and it is not uncommon to even stand upon their prey. For a white guy who grew up hearing black people are animals and have that notion reinforced by others around him as well as incidents that further dehumanize black people in his eyes, the white guy actually comes to believe black people ARE animals. Is he murderously psychopathic? No, he was culturally trained to kill as in the hunt. You have to be carefully taught. Unlearning is a hard road.

18 Jun 20 - 10:18 AM (#4059880)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Photon/light bends due to gravity. You could think that a light, since it's on a speed of light, must be frozen in time relative to us. Therefore, the gravity will also freeze and will not affect the light.
We can and have frozen the speed of light. Freezing gravity in a similar way may not be possible if it is an emergent force from a combination of other forces. But if it is not...you would not see the alterations in Space time or time gravity.
The time machine meets the invisible man!
Move over sci fi, here comes an advanced physics Tom clancy.

18 Jun 20 - 10:24 AM (#4059881)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

edit
Therefore 'if' gravity could freeze it will no longer bend light or influence matter.

18 Jun 20 - 04:11 PM (#4059951)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

John laCarre' and Tom Clancy might have fun depicting invisible spies wrapped in a cloak of locally altered and frozen time gravity.
Such as " On rare occaisions the time shrouded individuals leave a trace of minimal interaction with ordinary matter and time revealing a spherical nebulous glow that can pass through walls. Out of the corner of our eyes the spies are leaving the opposite of passing shadows."

18 Jun 20 - 04:38 PM (#4059957)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

As spy novels go, the fact that Russia is known for its monumental fuck ups, the plot goes far beyond Russian highjinks and plunges headlong into irreparable time disasters.

Perhaps most people don't know of at least 6 cities/regions that have disappeared or are uninhabitable inside Russia. This alone would make the novel worthwhile.

18 Jun 20 - 10:20 PM (#4060009)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm well entertained with the Russian screw up sub plot of everytime Putin tried to avoid a tremendous Trump flub by sending him into altered time, including Donald admiting to colluding with the Russians, a quantum effect of leaving a bit of presidential neurons neither here nor there results in Trump becoming progressively more stupid as evidenced by his tweets and behavior.
'it happens every election' is a working title.

18 Jun 20 - 10:27 PM (#4060015)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

There is no such thing as light or photons. See Elekgtroteknisk Tidsskrift (Electrotechnical Journal), Norway, Vol. 83, No. 3, 5.

19 Jun 20 - 07:46 AM (#4060071)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Seeing all the anomallys and paradox play out as Russian time interference rages out of control, makes life interesting if not mystifying. This morning Nina Totenberg, who died 8 months ago, appeared live on 'Morning Joe' and discussed the DACA decision.

19 Jun 20 - 09:40 AM (#4060112)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Do not turn the rhyme factor up to 100 on your autotext creator or this can happen:

Gigantic geriatric aromatic autocratic Nazis
Hate democratic diplomatic hispanics and Faucis.
Hatreds aren't few like blacks Jews and flus
But include the huge human race

19 Jun 20 - 12:26 PM (#4060153)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Thankfully Nina is alive and well and regularly reporting. As BS goes, that was Not Funny. :-/

19 Jun 20 - 12:27 PM (#4060154)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You might be thinking of Cokie Roberts.

19 Jun 20 - 06:58 PM (#4060237)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Nina is my favorite Supreme Court mistress. As aristocrats go she is one of the good guys. I never grow tired of the stories about her father's cello. She really was on Morning Joe today. You are right , it is best to have the RUSSIANS resurrect Cokie Roberts in their misguided attempt to save Donald Trump in their faulty time machine..

19 Jun 20 - 08:47 PM (#4060241)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And so ends a week with medical appointments every damned day.

20 Jun 20 - 11:42 AM (#4060340)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Today begins with MOM pouring bleach and water into the ceramic cups to clean out the tea stains. It's that kind of frumpy morning, I guess. Waiting for Oklahoma to spontaneously combust and the COVID-19 shrapnel from the explosion to hit the surrounding states. We've had thunderstorms in the region, last night was noisy and wet. Maybe a few of them will be washed away in flash floods (unless they heed the signs that say "turn around don't drown.") The storm before the storm.

20 Jun 20 - 12:52 PM (#4060351)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rap you never mentioned if your thumb was a contracture or break or joint problem...
Meanwhile fun can be had in the body shop.

Its probably my POV but Stilly is on track to be one of the all time great mods.

20 Jun 20 - 05:35 PM (#4060408)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A lack of cartilage required an arthedesis.

20 Jun 20 - 05:46 PM (#4060413)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I hope they come up with stem cell cartiledge replacement someday.
It sounds like a longer process however.

20 Jun 20 - 05:57 PM (#4060418)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Betelgeuse is just losing weight

That link doesn't work. Will this do? Betelgeuse: A Spinning, Dimming Red Giant That Swallowed Its Sister

21 Jun 20 - 10:08 AM (#4060550)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

See how early I'm up, Mom?

21 Jun 20 - 11:35 AM (#4060568)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I guess it depends on where in the world you are, Rap. If you're in the UK you're late to rise.

The world seems particularly churlish for this year's greeting card holiday for fathers. Everyone would do well to give it a pass, step back, and try not to have a stroke.

Here it's raining again. I was going to walk the dogs, but then the weather interrupted, so we played fetch in the back yard for a few minutes instead. It's amazing how little dogs care about politics and can bring their humans back to a rational point of view simply by running around with toys in their mouths.

21 Jun 20 - 09:05 PM (#4060658)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We could all try running around with toys in our mouths.

21 Jun 20 - 10:01 PM (#4060662)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I cleaned the carpet in the front room - half of it so far, anyway. I'll let it dry completely then move some of the furniture onto that area and wash the rest. In there, the dogs seem to have run around with dirt (yes, clods of dirt they eat on the carpet) and sticks (from the yard) they chew up into tiny pieces. Toys in their mouths would be preferable.

22 Jun 20 - 07:53 AM (#4060719)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I heard the rumor that the only classified material in the Bolton book that was redacted was that Melania has been putting an Oxy opiate in Donald Trump's diet Coke, which is only another cover story if his addiction is discovered. His other cover story is that he only took Oxy chloroquin. In my book 'The Art of the Lie' Eucadin (OXY in 1945) played a powerful role in WWII.

Thats a better Betelgeuse link. Mine only mentioned lots of dust in the way. Your link seems to explain why. The only fireworks we will see this summer will be the 4th of July and not a supernova.

22 Jun 20 - 12:13 PM (#4060780)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I'm trying to think of other situations in which looking through a cloud of interstellar dust might prove to be a useful explanation.

"Is my butt fat?"

"I can't really tell. I'm looking at it through a cloud of interstellar dust."

22 Jun 20 - 12:41 PM (#4060784)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

LOL Star cartoons are rare these days.

22 Jun 20 - 01:25 PM (#4060789)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What if the below the line BS section had a month long OPEN HOUSE allowing all to post as themselves or guests???

Its just a month. Before people started eating each other's young the experiment would be over. As a curious gus I am betting that the feared anathma of an released Krakan would not occur. In fact I predict no change.

22 Jun 20 - 09:45 PM (#4060864)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's been done. Long ago this part was as open as the posts above the salt. You can revisit it and see what happened and why only members are allowed to visit below the salt.

23 Jun 20 - 06:23 AM (#4060913)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I know full well. The Revolution is here. And that makes it very different. Perhaps you are right and the folksong and singer has no place in this unique time and place on a personal level.
How does Mudcat reflect these times? It is worth more thought.
Besides I am talking on a temporary basis.
At worst the contrast between the 'sick' and the healthy will be self evident. The choice is betwenn SUNLIGHT and lock and key.

23 Jun 20 - 03:31 PM (#4061018)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM says today is a gonner and we might as well all pull the covers over our heads and read in bed all day. Try again tomorrow.

23 Jun 20 - 09:47 PM (#4061103)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

And Bat Goddess had to put down her orange cat. Liver disease. Like MOM said, today is a gonner.

23 Jun 20 - 10:00 PM (#4061106)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Our central air blower decided it was done after 60 years.
They don't make bearings like that anymore.

due to a glitch I 'pulled a keb' and brought an old thread back.

24 Jun 20 - 09:26 PM (#4061245)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Anyone have a suggestion for a garage door manufacturer

24 Jun 20 - 09:35 PM (#4061247)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's a thread on the board about pet peeves. I have never had a pet peeve. All the peeves I encounter are quite feral. I wouldn't want to try to make a pet of a feral peeve. They bite and are difficult to house train.

24 Jun 20 - 09:37 PM (#4061248)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Anyone have suggestions for a new HVAC system?

25 Jun 20 - 09:20 AM (#4061308)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Lennox.

25 Jun 20 - 07:50 PM (#4061405)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

one bidder wanted 18K or 7K for air conditioner alone
Tommorrow I should get some reasonable estimates

My b in law died a couple hours ago from a heart attack in his sleep.
He was a Marine and in his eyes I was the enemy hippie for life.
My wife should understand funerals in a time of pandemic are lonely affairs.

26 Jun 20 - 08:20 AM (#4061476)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We were complimented last night on our roses. They are many and the bushes are of different hues.

26 Jun 20 - 08:45 AM (#4061479)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I trained an old rose vine to climb a devil's walking stick tree so the tree blooms roses in June 30 feet high. Hybrids will bloom all summer though.

The Devil tree makes interesting canes.
I'm looking for a cork tree. They grow 'impossible' branches.

27 Jun 20 - 07:46 AM (#4061659)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

By doing nothing, more people will get sick and die yet this is becoming the official policy in the US which is now passing its earlier all time high infection rate. This is because of the judgment that " we must not make the cure worse than the disease". So we open too early, force certain workers into infection chambers at work, roll back testing and contact tracing, have unmasked political gatherings inside and not supporting people who are unemployed. Go to crowded events and party. People are saying that those who die are already old or black... wink wink nudge nudge know what I mean?

We must even decide if we should try to save those who succumb to the virus at all if there are not enough beds, PPE or medical treatments.
We must not make treatment worse than the effect on the economy!
So go ahead and take no personal responsibility. DO NOT WEAR A MASK.
Be a fancy free Steve. You don't have to chant 'Lets do nothing' but just be sure to take no social respondsibility.
Not caring for the sick and dieing is easier than it sounds. It is the last viral intrusion on our lives. All that wasted money is saved. WE DON'T NEED TO BURY THE DEAD. Body removal has been shown to work best with ovens. Gas is cheap now, so take a flight and smirk. That reciculated air in a hypo baric pressure tube is less dangerous than an infected TSA agent. You can even take a cruise at half price.
Make life cheap again! {^/

HIEL TRUMP 2020

28 Jun 20 - 07:25 AM (#4061854)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I went with all Lennox heat and air for 6K including discount, duct clean and UV sterilizer installed om Thur.

28 Jun 20 - 01:04 PM (#4061897)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Almost every cartoon with one click
https://www.cartooncollections.com/collections

28 Jun 20 - 06:25 PM (#4061939)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It is raining and 50F. And it's coming after yooooouuuuu!

29 Jun 20 - 06:43 AM (#4061994)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Re: Moderation change
No one is to say Jehovah, ow who threw that?... or attack others including themselves, politicians or Jehova - WUMP

No discussion, it's a warning without an argument, because given the opportunity, the parties most likely to be kicked out are the ones who want to argue about it.

29 Jun 20 - 09:29 AM (#4062007)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Now it's 46F and rain is starting in 20 minutes.

29 Jun 20 - 11:11 AM (#4062019)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's dusty and windy and humid - a really odd combination. It's a stirred up atmosphere that seems to suit the mood lately. I have never been one to lounge in my pajamas all day, like so many who seem to have adopted that routine while they've been working from home. Perhaps as a retiree I established a daily routine that involved getting completely dressed, and choosing my shoes based upon the day's activity (Garden work? Socks and tie-on sneakers or boots. Walking around the house? Loafers or sandals will do.) But I stayed home and preserved my health and that of my neighbors all spring, and now a few fools have decided science and prudent COVID-19-prevention practices aren't for them, so we basically have to start all over again. They've squandered the work we all did this spring. And we know why. There's no fixing stupid, but MOM says it's a good thing none of those fools from Washington, D.C. are coming to town this summer. Something about throwing bags of dog poop. . .

29 Jun 20 - 11:41 AM (#4062022)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

MOAB has taken a turn from from a tradition of colorful fiction to realism. so Today I cut back the jungle from encroaching into the swimming hole. Tommorrow I'll take the cover off and start the filter.
By July 4th we can take the plunge.

29 Jun 20 - 02:55 PM (#4062059)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What am I wearing?
A faux satin no wrinkle long sleeve grey shirt, grey underwear no undershirt, light cream Dockers, black socks and slip on shoes. The belt is black and has a rachet mechanism and not an old fashioned tongue in hole type.
To go directly from these work clothes to being dressed up I put on a solid colorful sport jacket; yellow, rose or actual faux deerskin shirt at night. If its too hot, I stay at home in my boxer briefs and T shirt. :^/

The theme is to limit exposure to the Earth's damaging yellow star.
It only takes a week of sunshine to bleach my hair from strawberry to light blonde.

29 Jun 20 - 05:31 PM (#4062072)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Well, not reality - MOM wouldn't really throw bags of dog poop.

29 Jun 20 - 05:34 PM (#4062073)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That said, it's difficult to make up BS more bizarre than what is appearing nightly on the news.

29 Jun 20 - 06:03 PM (#4062079)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

"Only wimps go to the hospital
Brave and patriotic Americans don't wear masks and shun those democrat hospitals. We won't play into the hands of the China virus. Our idea of social distancing is an AR 15. Brave Americans say they would rather die than submit to the hoax against the right by the looney left." Realmen#Kungflu

Is it wrong to waste my breath on them if it takes my breath away?

29 Jun 20 - 06:47 PM (#4062085)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Gee, I'm in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. It's chilly outside, but tomorrow will be better and I believe EVERYTHING the National Whether Service says because it's part of our government and our government would NEVER EVER fib. Well, there was a teensy little fib made when I enlisted, and then there was the one about Watergate, but those are excusable. And maybe the ones about it never snowing here and everything being perfect in all ways. Here's what they said:

It's true! It's true! The Mayor has made it clear.
The climate must be perfect all the year.

A law was made a distant moon ago here:
July and August cannot be too hot.
And there's a legal limit to the snow here
In Pocatello.
The winter is forbidden till December
And exits March the second on the dot.
By order, summer lingers through September
In Pocatello.

Pocatello! Pocatello!
I know it sounds a bit bizarre,
But in Pocatello, Pocatello
That's how conditions are.
The rain may never fall till after sundown.
By eight, the morning fog must disappear.
In short, there's simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Pocatello.

Pocatello! Pocatello!
I know it gives a person pause,
But in Pocatello, Pocatello
Those are the legal laws.
The snow may never slush upon the hillside.
By nine p.m. the moonlight must appear.
In short, there's simply not
A more congenial spot
For happily-ever-aftering than here
In Pocatello.

29 Jun 20 - 09:53 PM (#4062100)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I think I shall take up a new musical instrument. A guy has offered to sell me an F# Umlaut, made by Con Instruments. It sounds like a great deal!

30 Jun 20 - 07:21 AM (#4062144)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You can't legislate everything but umlauts should be chromatic by law.
? Besides they only modify another instrumnt

The one I have on a 1930 violin changes the sound from eeeeeeeeeeee
to 000000000000. Back then it was trade marked as the Resonator.

Breaking news from WPAT:
This Kent Brockman of WPAT with drier .. rather dire news about the pandemic. Experts say "What didya think was gonna happen !!??"

30 Jun 20 - 08:34 AM (#4062156)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

After today I am free of appointments until next Monday. It will be cool at the beach, surfing and hangin' with the chicks, listening to the Beach Boys, sippin' brewskis and talkin' boards and cars with the guys. Unfortunately, none of that stuff exists around here, although I can find lots of rock-climbing freaks and people who like to see how close they can get to bear and bison. I guess I'll actually go drink some coffee with the old farts at the Elks, go see the doctor, get the mail (if any), and pick up some stuff at the store. Then I'll bunker up again.

30 Jun 20 - 06:02 PM (#4062227)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I need to set up the outdoor shower for nighttime use on the back patio. It's a luxury in the city to have a secluded yard like this, when most people have neighbors who can see into their yards. Going outside naked is one of the luxuries of childhood (my kids played naked in the little wading pool and in the shower sprinkler thing my mother sent them). But it should also be enjoyed by adults. This shower head attaches to the hose and the water running through the lines now is plenty warm enough.

Growing up in Seattle I remember summer expeditions when we were allowed to sleep in the back yard in a pup tent, but down here the idea of sleeping outside in the heat and with fire ants means Texas children have missed one of the joys of childhood.

Now, Texas children could enact some of the dramatic episodes of cowboy western programs, like the rattle snake crawling into the sleeping bag while you're asleep. Like quick sand and piranhas, this was a staple of television drama when I was a child.

30 Jun 20 - 06:43 PM (#4062236)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The temperate rainforests in the NW are vast and magical. The NE has two small rainforests in NYS. Don't let Texas mess with you. There is talk of closing travel out of TX.

My older cousin in law Jeff Hakman was a surfing champion. Now he does commercials for hurrycane and reverse mortgages.

30 Jun 20 - 09:04 PM (#4062246)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I and my friends well champion surfers when we were growing up. Unfortunately, the surf on the Mississippi River wasn't and isn't exactly "all-time" and boards (and full sized logs) tended to dissolve upon contact with the water. The river's cleaned up a lot since then and now you can drop a glass bottle in and pull it out only slightly etched.

30 Jun 20 - 09:18 PM (#4062249)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Stilly, I remember reading about one of the towns in
the "Hill Country" of Texas, to the south of you,
and I am thinking of those German-American farmers.
Was it New Braunfels? Fredericksburg?
They had their homesteads out in the country;
they had to come to market often enough, and
of course they were church-goers,
so they would come to town on Sunday,
and didn't they have 'Sunday-cottages' or something in town,
with outdoor showers -- that's why you reminded me of them --
and just the basics for sleeping overnight or something.
Then it was back to the farm for another week of hard work.

And when times changed and the town changed and developed,
eventually there were only a few of these little sunday-houses
still standing, and now
they are the real-estate version of collector's items,
historical artifacts.
I probably scrambled this up in recalling.

30 Jun 20 - 09:42 PM (#4062255)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've sail boarded, power belly boarded and did ice flow hopping but never surfed. The biggest adrenaline bang for the buck was ice flow hopping, especially when they tip by 45 degrees in a place called Chokonut Creek that feeds into the mighty Susquehanna. There is nothing like the feeling when your push branch no longer reaches the bottom and you can see the river ahead.

01 Jul 20 - 09:41 AM (#4062293)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Underground
below the slime
the air grows stale
but folks feel fine.
In the sun the wind
is death if in the end
you lose your breath.
C'mon down,
the catacombs
are fine made in times
when memories end.
In all plagues
some were worse,
some were not
It took only one
to come in
and change the plot.
Stacking bones
with great thought
few remember
who it was
who brought death
underground
Or what they thought
of what they caught
until their den
was without a sound
of cries sighs or cough

01 Jul 20 - 10:31 AM (#4062299)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Who puts the shish
on your kabob
or relish on
your hot dog
Who puts a pinch of salt
on your egg
or some sauce
on your gonzofazoul

The Randy man can
the randy man can
and has a secret rhthym
that you can't understand
but the randy man knows

Who shaves so close his cheeks glow
it feels like peachy fuzz
What the randy man does
with a can of whipped cream
few have ever known

Who finishs the ice cream
but leaves a little bit for you
spills chocolate syrup
on the waxed kichen floor
but cleans it all up
The randy man knows
all the perfect ways
to cure your weary woes...

01 Jul 20 - 09:25 PM (#4062390)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My fitness tracker, phone and office clock all give the same time. I guess my watch is off.

01 Jul 20 - 10:11 PM (#4062392)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For the record while we chew the fat and shoot the breeze there is an historic lack of federal response to the national quadrupal threat of disease, unemployment, police murders and financial security. Its not just the pandemic, its the tradjedy of calling it a hoax and waging war on science itself.
Every President since WW2 has had to respond to a crises of war or natural diaster and have done so with varying degrees of success until now. We're not just talking about Covid 19, or racial inequality that gone on for 400 years, or a financial crises without tax funds available to save lives and jobs, we have a leadership crises.
I have never seen a President and administration fail to take any respondsibility at all until now. I know I have avoided respondsibility but at least I have given warnings. We are trying to step up and do the right thing but a third of us don't or won't, and can drag the rest of us under. Once again so few can cause the death of so many. Now back to our regularly scheduled banter.

02 Jul 20 - 09:42 PM (#4062536)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

THE MOSCOW RULES

1. Assume nothing.
2. Never go against your gut.
3. Everyone is potentially under opposition control.
4. Don't look back -- you are never completely alone.
5. Go with the flow.
6. Vary your pattern and stay within your cover.
7. Lull them into a state of complacency.
8. Don't harass the opposition.
9. Pick the time and place for action.
10. Keep your options open.

Mom taught these to me at her knee.

02 Jul 20 - 09:45 PM (#4062538)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Russian election law #1
Elections are determined by those who count the vote, not the electorate.

03 Jul 20 - 10:02 PM (#4062674)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Tomorrow I shall bunker up.

03 Jul 20 - 11:55 PM (#4062677)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You know that cartoon "Someone is wrong on the Internet" ? I ran into a bunch of those folks on a favorite site today and was disappointed that management wasn't corralling the kids. If there was EVER a source of BS, it is The Internet.

Just sayin'.

04 Jul 20 - 04:49 PM (#4062826)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Bunker safely, Rapparee, whether up, down, or sideways,
and have a good Independence Day.

05 Jul 20 - 12:23 AM (#4062879)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Eventually they have to run out of ammunition.

05 Jul 20 - 08:46 AM (#4062930)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The Earth 9, mankind 0 https://www.cbsnews.com/news/arctic-temperature-record-100-4-degrees-earth-warmest-12000-years/#:~:text=Bird%20Carrying%20Fish-,

05 Jul 20 - 11:17 AM (#4062946)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Zoonoses.

05 Jul 20 - 11:28 AM (#4062947)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Eventually, but that time hasn't come yet. There seems to have been an unspoken consensus in the region that no fireworks laws would be enforced. Lucky we had a good rain a week or so ago, it helped with grass fires. From dusk until many hours later it sounded like a reenactment of a battle scene from the Civil War. Canons, pistols, and the occasional Gatling gun discharge of strings of firecrackers.

I fear they have simply stopped to sleep and eat, and will resume the assault at dusk today. MOM liked the sparklers at the house, but said the boys had better watch those explosives down by The Legion Hovel or the thing will go up like an exploded ammo bunker.

05 Jul 20 - 10:12 PM (#4063001)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Legion Hovel IS an ammunition bunker. Just the alcohol there would make it such!

05 Jul 20 - 10:23 PM (#4063004)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

So that's why there's a sign on the front door

No Lit Matches Allowed

06 Jul 20 - 02:53 PM (#4063110)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

"Look at the crowd at this Great Trump Rally despite the Kung Flu hoax.
*large cheer* There must be 10,000 in this tiny old theatre. The virus is 99% harmless so lets have applause for the 10 people who are going to die for this rally *feeble applause* and for all the old folks we can do without *applause from a couple dozen* and my daughter Ivanka for modeling her new line of bikinis * large cheer *". :^/

"The communists and fascists are attacking and disfiguring our great Confederate heros and generals. *sparse applause* , The blacks and brown people will to go to prison for murdering our confederate statues * large cheer *
And Lock Hilary up with Biden *THUNDEROUS CHEER*"

06 Jul 20 - 09:01 PM (#4063172)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We are all Puerto Ricans now. We all saw Trump throw paper towels at Islanders devastated by a natural disaster. Now we have a viral disaster and are experiencing the results of the same cavalier leadership. Donald did not throw toilet paper at us but he has done worse, he made the pandemic the worst on Earth right here in the USA .
Lives will be lost, "get used to it", but statues must be saved.
We are one named hurricane away from seeing the Trump FEMA response.

07 Jul 20 - 01:21 AM (#4063189)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That works for me—"We are all Puerto Ricans now." Too bad that in the next month or two the world will commiserate and instead of Je suis Charlie Hebdo it will be Je suis Américain.

07 Jul 20 - 04:07 PM (#4063269)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

It's your middle dog Pepper who is unhappy, Stilly,
about the fireworks?

08 Jul 20 - 05:34 PM (#4063413)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Every one of my canine friends is unhappy about fireworks. So am I, for that matter.

08 Jul 20 - 06:32 PM (#4063425)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The only laugh today came from a Freudean slip by Pense when he said
"Today's Covid 19 task force briefing is about opening our schools unsafely".

09 Jul 20 - 04:29 PM (#4063548)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The only one around here who isn't concerned by the fireworks is the Labrador retriever who is just about completely deaf. There was a string of m-80s that went off last night, but otherwise I think most of those jokers shot their firework wads on July 4, through the early hours of July 5.

I have concluded that the puppy gets into the most trouble during those times that the middle dog beats up on her the most. Dog correction can be brutal, but it does work. So I'll let Pepper handle the discipline for a while and see what happens. MOM says it's mostly just noise, though she has threatened them with the garden hose a couple of times.

09 Jul 20 - 09:57 PM (#4063576)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Our four neighbors have been gone nearly a week now. The toys lay in yard unused, waiting for the touch of slobbery mouth. It's so sad. However, the treats await.

10 Jul 20 - 07:22 AM (#4063629)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

HURRICANE GONZO IS HERE.

10 Jul 20 - 07:46 AM (#4063630)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hurricane Gonzo set to music

10 Jul 20 - 10:42 AM (#4063649)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

hypothetical hurricane gonzalo

10 Jul 20 - 12:15 PM (#4063659)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Bullshit and a mighty wind, they are part of the foundation of this and the original thread (that still won't open—I tried it again the other day.)

10 Jul 20 - 07:21 PM (#4063708)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We don't get them storms!

11 Jul 20 - 10:58 AM (#4063750)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

They say these are uncertain days. BullShit! I am certain these are days. They say these are challenging days. Aren't they all.
They say these are dark days. Well I concur, sort of. Especially at night when you look up at the heavens. Some of us know that the universe is getting dimmer. As the everlasting know it all, for the last 2 billion years the universe is dimmer because of expansion, less star formation and more black holes. Because of the Sun during the day you won't notice any dimming. But at night it is significanly darker than it used to be. In our neihborhood out here in the suburbs of the Milkey Way where there are not street lights on every corner, the darkness is even more obvious.

11 Jul 20 - 12:42 PM (#4063758)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It only seems darker because the Galactic Overlord bought Galactic Gas and Electric a few light-years ago and has been dimming the lights ever since but still charging the same rates.

11 Jul 20 - 03:48 PM (#4063765)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Guns sales are higher now than in the Obama days. Our Sheriff is feeling like a spider on a Coleman stove. There is talk of the 'night of the coughing dead' this October in an effort to get rid of the infected.

11 Jul 20 - 10:01 PM (#4063802)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Not out here. Everybody already own guns. Some ammo is in short supply, but .50-100 is still plentiful, if you own an old buffalo gun.

12 Jul 20 - 10:19 AM (#4063843)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

We haven't heard from the Galactic Overlord for a while. I wonder what he's up to (other than shorting gas company customers).

12 Jul 20 - 09:12 PM (#4063939)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'll be going to the LILP (Legion Intergalactic Listening Post) this evening and should be able to browse the files then. Usually the LILP Runner (LILPR) brings everyone copies of all documents marked "Burn Before Reading" and "Really, Really Secret Stuff" by the GO's Security Orifice.

13 Jul 20 - 09:37 AM (#4063997)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Galactic Overlord should be plural like Senators or Congressmen. But as a Congress it is singularly a disaster.

13 Jul 20 - 06:36 PM (#4064072)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Below the line is chuggin along with 8 folks

13 Jul 20 - 09:06 PM (#4064088)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I suspect that the GO is composed of several Overlord wannabees, much like a jellyfish is composed of multiple organisms. I wonder -- if you poke his/her/its fat little belly, would he/she/it giggle? My zoology courses didn't cover jellyfish giggles.

13 Jul 20 - 09:19 PM (#4064091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Jellyfish are immortal. When adult populations are under threat they revert to tiny juveniles and they regrow. Without dieing they grow young again and start anew. It is a strange immortality to be sure.

14 Jul 20 - 05:13 AM (#4064109)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I don't know what a jellyfish giggle looks like but many of them produce colorful light shows in their bodies that could very well be communication. I have yet to find a Babbel course on how to speak jellyfish.

14 Jul 20 - 09:01 AM (#4064129)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Obviously you need a Babelfish.

14 Jul 20 - 09:46 AM (#4064132)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

. . . which reminds me:
what is the deal with the
"Translate" feature built into Mudcat posts,
which just takes you to
a page at Yahoo dot com and
a message that says
uh - oh, this doesn't work ...

the URL has babelfish in it ...

14 Jul 20 - 08:57 PM (#4064195)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Got me. I didn't know it did that. Being fluent in English, Profane, Obscene, and Blasphemous I rarely need to translate anything.

14 Jul 20 - 10:10 PM (#4064204)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

At one time Babelfish was a robust translation feature that was purchased by the old Yahoo.com. It was killed off a long time ago and Max never got around to taking it out of the line or redirecting it to Google Translate. Yahoo has been purchased by Verizon.

15 Jul 20 - 06:40 AM (#4064227)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Sounds reasonable, as long as I don't get redirected to Hell

15 Jul 20 - 08:24 AM (#4064245)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Neither Michigan nor Minnesota are bad places this time of year. Except for the mosquitoes.

15 Jul 20 - 12:36 PM (#4064297)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Same with Washington (State).

15 Jul 20 - 06:28 PM (#4064338)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Or Oregon, home to the Armillaria solidipes.

15 Jul 20 - 09:07 PM (#4064347)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Morels: magnificent morsels.

15 Jul 20 - 09:09 PM (#4064349)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

After forest fires you get plenty of them. We don't have any except in stores.

15 Jul 20 - 09:34 PM (#4064350)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm slowly putting in the last of my vegetable garden this summer, but nearly passed out from the heat after 45 minutes of work (after 6pm). No mushrooms down here, but the okra will be good when it gets going.

16 Jul 20 - 09:27 AM (#4064425)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Try looking amidst clumps of Mayapples (Podophyllum peltatum), also called American Mandrake.

16 Jul 20 - 09:36 AM (#4064427)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its too dry for any fruiting right now but August promises to be a gonzo season for shrooms and berries.

16 Jul 20 - 07:09 PM (#4064499)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I had a surprise crop of chanterelles pop up courtesy of a recent rainy spell. Made a nice soup and had enough for omelets the next couple of mornings.

17 Jul 20 - 08:00 AM (#4064563)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL for some reason you remind me that we all should have our own theme songs. For that matter the Pandemic should have its own Theme Music

17 Jul 20 - 12:03 PM (#4064603)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Nice one, Donuel. I've always like Rachmaninoff's Vocalise, but there seems to be a shortage of lyric sopranos when orchestras get ready to record it and they usually use cellos or other string instruments. Here's a woman singing. It's not like you need to learn the words, just the melody.

Re: mushrooms, I should clarify that there are lots of mushrooms and fungi down here, but none that I would consider eating. Unless they come from the grocery store.

17 Jul 20 - 01:31 PM (#4064618)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The voice as in vocalise is what every enlightened cellist strives to produce in a lifetime. It almost happens once or twice but more often most produce a sound like a box of bees at a quarter the volume of a voice.

17 Jul 20 - 04:42 PM (#4064640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

SONGFACTS ®

Was the end of July so hot you could cry
A semi full of frozen human meat
Driver Pete didn't know his reefer's beat
Haulin bodies outta LA is why
Its 110 and we gotta long way to go
'Bout a mile outta Shaky Town
I says, "Pig Pen, this here's the Rubber Duck.
"And I'm about to getta ice cold drink."

'Cause we got a little ol' convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a little ol' convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'Cross the U-S-A.
Convoy!

By the time we got past Tulsa Town,
Pete's truck smelled worse than liberal hell.
we bypassed a roadblock that checked for masks
It had bears wall-to-wall .
Yeah, them smokies is thick as bugs on a bumper;
They even had a bear in the air!
I says, "Callin' all trucks, this here's the Duck.
"We about to go missin before we drop our load ."

'Cause we got a great big convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a great big convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'Cross the U-S-A.
Convoy!

Well, we rolled up Interstate 44
Like a rocket sled on rails.
We tore up all of our swindle sheets,
And left 'em settin' on the scales.
By the time we hit that Chi-town,
Them bears was a-gettin' smart:
They'd brought up some reinforcements
From the Illinois National Guard.
There's armored cars, and tanks, and jeeps,
And rigs of ev'ry size.
Yeah, them chicken coops was full'a bears
And choppers filled the skies.
Well, we shot the line and we went for broke
With a thousand screamin' trucks
An' eleven long-haired Friends a' Jesus
In a chartreuse micra-bus.

Well, we laid a strip for the Jersey shore
Prepared to cross the line
I could see the bridge was lined with bears
But I didn't have a dog-goned dime.
I says, "Pig Pen, this here's the Rubber Duck.
"We just ain't a-gonna pay no toll."
So we crashed the gate doing ninety-eight
I says "Let them truckers roll, 10-4."

'Cause we got a mighty convoy
Rockin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a mighty convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
we're gonna hide Trump's death toll
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna roll this truckin' convoy
'Cross the U-S-A.
Convoy! Convoy! Convoy! Convoy!

17 Jul 20 - 08:37 PM (#4064655)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well, it's finally happened.

17 Jul 20 - 11:32 PM (#4064665)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

"It's finally happened" seems to happen to me more frequently with each passing day.

And my theme song is "Bony Fingers" by Hoyt Axton, not something by some Russian guy whose name I can't spell.

18 Jul 20 - 09:12 AM (#4064744)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Weren't the Chantrelles one of the girl groups back in early 60s? Why are you calling them mushrooms?

18 Jul 20 - 03:51 PM (#4064813)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Yes. They opened for the Puff Balls when they were on tour with the Chicken of the Woods.

18 Jul 20 - 06:12 PM (#4064827)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The punk band Moshrooms looked like a bunch of dicks in the 70's but now in their 70's they are quite distinguished.

18 Jul 20 - 07:11 PM (#4064833)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There's a world where I can go and tell my secrets to
In my room, I've got Zoom
In this world I lock out all my worries and my fears
In my room, streaming Zoom
Do my dreaming and my scheming
Lie awake and pray
Do my crying and my sighing
Laugh at yesterday
Now it's dark and I'm alone
But I won't be afraid
In my room, I've got Zoom
In my room, with my Zoom
In my room, like a tomb
threats are wafting in the still air
But not in my room,
not in my room

19 Jul 20 - 01:23 PM (#4064931)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The only known particle that has NO spin is the Higgs Boson.
The Higgs field is everywhere and not just near a Higgs Boson.
However there are weak spots in the field in which the Higgs boson falls apart. To our surprise the slight absence of something creates a presence of something else. For our purposes the something from the absence of something else will be called the BS wave. We are in the midst of an intense BS wave which distorts reality in horrifying and opposite ways. Expertise is being replaced by hoaxs and lies, intelligence is replaced by ignorance, fairness is replaced by cruelty and cons, massless light speed particles are replaced by slow supermassive particles. Particles that once carried forces now carry frauds. The fundamental changes caused by the BS wave are unpredictable. It is uncertain if the BS wave will pass us by or linger. May the BS be with you, until it isn't.

19 Jul 20 - 10:23 PM (#4065016)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The absence of something is the presence of absence. You cannot have pure absence because absence is then present. Geez, I explained this to my third grade teacher so she'd know that I really wasn't absent that week.

20 Jul 20 - 03:59 PM (#4065130)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

The absence of presence and the presence of absence aren't the same. They have different topographies.

The absence of presence is a featureless flat surface.

The presence of absence is a deep hole with steep sides.

20 Jul 20 - 08:56 PM (#4065187)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Absence and presence are the same thing. I can write this out in Boolean Logic, or, if you'd rather, another system. However, I'm certain that you are aware that Gödel's Incompleteness Theorems demonstrate the inherent limitations of every formal axiomatic system, perhaps even Hilbert's program.

20 Jul 20 - 09:02 PM (#4065190)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A savage bar fight breaks out over the absence of presence.*>#~&*
I am most impressed that -only- the Higgs boson has no spin or charge.

21 Jul 20 - 12:33 AM (#4065201)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If this slap and dodge bar fight should grow into a "beautiful world war", like a butterfly flap into the roar of a hurricane, Trump would be happier than a pig in shit
He used to love playing battleship.

Now: How to stretch applause> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elYSQkTWfTw

21 Jul 20 - 12:38 AM (#4065202)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Concerto for funny walks while sitting down. Scjak Micjalin

21 Jul 20 - 10:05 AM (#4065275)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Well, I suppose that, from a purely mathematical standpoint, the presence of absence is not a deep hole with steep sides. A true hole goes all the way through, like the hole in a doughnut. Therefore, the presence of absence is a deep indentation with steep sides. Glad we got that cleared up.

21 Jul 20 - 01:33 PM (#4065295)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Predicted by super symmetry theory there could be another 7 bosons with no spin that we have not detected. There is no telling what kind of fields they produce, causing all other particles in those fields to express different properties/super powers. Some cosmologists refer to the other bosons by the names of the 7 dwarves but complicating matters others are going with; Higgs, Gigs, Figs, Eggs, Digs, Cigs, Bigs and Aids.

21 Jul 20 - 04:50 PM (#4065317)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We are told that the Higgs allows some particles to express mass but not massless light speed particles. What if the Higgs or other spinless boson field allows particles to express other properties like dark matter having gravity? It all seems like a game changer that I will never grasp. The confirmed existence of the Higgs was measured by the LHC in terms of the absence of something after it was blown up. No one has ever seen, pointed to or found a Higgs in the pocket of their jeans.

21 Jul 20 - 06:12 PM (#4065322)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yes, I did. I reached in and there it was, just where I left it, only it had been run through the washer and dryer a couple of days ago. The boson was only slightly the worse for wear, unlike the Kleenex that I had also forgotten.

21 Jul 20 - 06:58 PM (#4065328)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

I just found out that one of my dearest friends is a ...
... cover your eyes, Rapparee ...
quilter.
Truly, I had no idea.
I have never been to my friend's house, as close as we are,
and if I had not been told,
I would never have guessed that the basement is filled
with cotton fabric for quilting.

I don't know:
what are the telltale signs,
in someone you believe you know well,
that they make ... quilts ... in the privacy of their homes?

(My friend, currently, is making
more facemasks than quilts, but still.)

21 Jul 20 - 06:58 PM (#4065329)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I sometimes look for the thread that people choose to not post to such as Black Lives Matter. The absence of posting something doesn't make them racist but it is suspicious.

21 Jul 20 - 07:28 PM (#4065335)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Keb, one telltale sign of a quilter is that family members wear shoes with two-inch thick soles to prevent damage to feet from stray straight pins. Also, if a quilter has a vacuum cleaner with a rotating brush, it will have at least 100 yards of variously colored sewing threads wrapped around it.

21 Jul 20 - 11:09 PM (#4065344)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

There will be threads of various colors on their clothing (except in Canada, the UK, and so forth, when the threads will be of various coloUrs). Books, many books, many, many books. There will be much fabric and little money. But the biggest and most evident sign is the magnetic pull of fabric stores -- and when fabric, quilts, sewing machines and such-like are mentioned they will have a seizure-like episode if with a non-quilter and if with another quilter begin arguing and fighting over the benefits of various brands of fabric, sewing machines, long-arm machines, quilting patterns, historicity of quilts, and even more esoteric subjects.

22 Jul 20 - 04:53 AM (#4065374)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Long arm machines cost thousands of dollars. Our weary machine is in the shop.

22 Jul 20 - 09:39 AM (#4065424)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Priced a Bernina or Viking or Pfaff lately? And they're short-arm machines.

22 Jul 20 - 09:40 AM (#4065425)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And they have to be inspected all the time. It's called a "short-arm inspection."

22 Jul 20 - 10:15 AM (#4065434)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

heh heh
I collect music manuscript print cloth

22 Jul 20 - 11:12 AM (#4065444)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

My 1948 rotary White (it's cast iron and weighs a ton) is my best machine in the house. It only sews straight lines, but it sews them faster and more reliably than the other machines. I have a Domestic that is a White off-brand bought in about 1990 that is slow to start (you have to push the hand wheel to get it started) and it slows down on several layers. Not the case with the 1948 machine. I put away the Domestic machine when I got a White "Jeans Machine" (from about 1980s) from Goodwill for $25 and after adding a bobbin case and presser foot, it's a better machine than my original one.

Since this is MOAB and MOM loves to sew, I thought I'd show you the machine she uses.

22 Jul 20 - 12:11 PM (#4065451)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

No one reccommends Viking, no one repairs Pffaff.
They called and said ours did not survive the transplant operation

22 Jul 20 - 12:36 PM (#4065453)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I worked on my own machines, cleaning and oiling this spring as I was getting underway with sewing masks. There are three so far I've serviced. White hasn't been made for years - and if you look up the companies at Wikipedia you'll see that most of them have gobbled up each other over the years. One offshoot of this is that if you go to the Singer.com site and in the Manuals/Support link, you can enter any machine and it comes up with results. Not just Singers. It has to do with all of the companies merging their manuals, etc. My 1948 White Series 77 machine manual was in there.

22 Jul 20 - 04:03 PM (#4065486)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We are finding that a decent one can't be bought. We are progressing to beg borrow and stealing. Is is almost 4PM and it is as dark as 10PM.
hmm looks like rain.

22 Jul 20 - 04:12 PM (#4065487)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Look on eBay. There are lots of reliable older machines there for sale. I have one I'll sell but it's in a table and I have to figure out if it needs rewiring first.

22 Jul 20 - 05:33 PM (#4065499)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We own: 2.5 Pfaffs, 1 Singer Featherweight, 2 Kenmore Massives, 1 Singer treadle. The 0.5 Pfaff is kept in Indiana.

22 Jul 20 - 07:24 PM (#4065514)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom! I need some political advice!

I want to put up a "Biden for President" lawn sign. But since I live in a VERY red area, it would probably be stolen almost immediately. What I need to know is the best non-lethal way to booby trap the sign. Ideally, I'd sit in a tree with a loaded shotgun, wait for someone to try to steal the sign, and blast off four quick "warning shots". But I don't have enough patience to spend that much time waiting to shoot something I can't even eat. Maybe I could just surround the sign with a six-foot wide six-inch deep perimeter of really gooey cow shit.

22 Jul 20 - 09:13 PM (#4065522)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My booby trap comes in 2 forms easy and hard. Wear gloves: The easy way is coat sign in lard or vasoline and liberally sprinkle ground ghost pepper on it. Place sign sheltered from rain.

The hard way is to attach the sign to 2 foot buried rebar and add step cement. Replace sod. Repeat easy booby trap.
The fun begins when they slightly touch their eye.

22 Jul 20 - 09:45 PM (#4065524)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Quasi legal booby trap;
Take 1/4 lb of Iodine crystals and dissolve in a quart or less of Ammonia. IT IS Safe while wet with Ammonia, Optional - add a couple grams of powdered potassium or magnesium.
Apply wet brown sludge distillate to back of sign and allow to dry. Do not touch! If touched there is a big cloud of purple smoke and resounding blam. Even a blade of grass could set it off.
Or be creative;
For small blams pack keyholes with wet sludge. Splattering wet sludge with paint brush on basement stairs and walls will create spontaneous bangs when dry for days or more.

22 Jul 20 - 10:03 PM (#4065525)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are many invisible and forensicly untraceable booby traps that only require being touched but they are potentially lethal and not fun.

22 Jul 20 - 10:04 PM (#4065527)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Rat traps are handy things. So are punji sticks. Or see here.

22 Jul 20 - 10:51 PM (#4065528)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Maybe bringing the sign inside at night would do the trick. Sign thieves usually wait until after dark....

Nah, it just doesn't have the panache of a booby-trap, and I'm to the point of needing all the panache I can get.

22 Jul 20 - 11:36 PM (#4065531)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I bet McGuyver read that book (and I never watched McGuyver).

I didn't put up Hillary signs last time because there were Trump vandals out not just stealing signs, but doing damage. This year a sign will go out. And if I can find an anti-Trump sign, maybe one of those also. "He belongs in jail" has a familiar ring . . .

23 Jul 20 - 07:02 PM (#4065619)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I think the recipe thread has a post on how to make panache.

GONZO IS COMING STRAIGHT FOR STILLY. but its going to turn right not left like FOX says, Afterall Its Texas

23 Jul 20 - 09:03 PM (#4065624)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

So you think that no one is protecting you and/or Earth from the assaults of the Galactic Overlord! Well, here's photographic proof how the Idaho Legion protects Earth (and you, personally).

This is the Legion's Stronghold in the mountains above Pocatello. You can see the path of the mighty Portneuf River, the lights of the town reflected in it. In the upper left is the track of one of the GO's Stardreadnoughts as it runs away, hoping to reach Stellar Escape Velocity before the Legion can unleash another Stardreadnought-shattering bolt of quantum might (the other streak in the sky), kinda right of center).

Yes, once again the Legion put its lives on the line to defend you and the planet from perfidious perdition at the hands of the horrendous henchthing of the Galactic Overlord!

23 Jul 20 - 09:30 PM (#4065627)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Wow
Castle, Comet and space vomit in one photo.
That castle was once stuffed to the rafters with stolen Art by the Reich.

I got around to verifying the vertical rainbow I saw in April.
None were as bright and colorful as the one I saw but they all do only appear at sunset. It was definately Overlord phenomena and amazing.

A Texas Gonzo hurricane COMBINED WITH an extreme pandemic / government take over / historic unemployment and food shortage didn't seem likely last year but its time to admit the shit has hit the fan.

24 Jul 20 - 06:20 AM (#4065660)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Just kidding GONZO is gone and is just hot air.

24 Jul 20 - 03:49 PM (#4065733)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Gonzo's not gone, but appears to be going.

Hanna is happening.

And that mass of stuff over Cape Verde way stands a good chance of becoming Isaias, which is about the dumbest storm name ever. Regardless of how it's supposed to be pronounced, you know it's going to get called "Is-a-ass". It would be downright embarrassing to have one's house blown away by Is-a-ass.

24 Jul 20 - 09:30 PM (#4065756)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I have friends in Houston who are probably not enjoying the high humidity and whatever weather that storm is generating. Sometimes the humidity reaches us from coastal storms.

Windy

Earth

25 Jul 20 - 09:47 PM (#4065855)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yes, yes it is.

26 Jul 20 - 03:26 PM (#4065971)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Actual dialog from High Plains Drifter:

That stranger,

he has taken over my hotel...

and thrown good, honest,

decent folk out into the night.

-Why didn't you stop him, Lewis?

You've got a gun.

-Shut your fat mouth, Sam.

We're tired of giving you money
for doing an incompetent job.

- Don't you talk to me that way!

- Gentlemen!

Please! Look at us Sweet God,

look what's happening to us!

-Right, it's just like

the preacher says.

That stranger's got everybody

at each other's throats.

He's set himself up like a king.

He's got you all snake-fascinated,

every damn one of you.

This crazy wall.

Two hundred gallons of blood-red paint.

It couldn't be worse if the devil

himself had ridden into Lago.

Our town looks like Hell.

-Welcome to Lago,

you son of a bitch.

27 Jul 20 - 10:57 AM (#4066104)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Looking for a source of modest entertainment? Put one of those little floating solar fountains into the bird bath and watch the birds approach it only to do a quick turn and escape when the water spouts. They'll figure it out eventually, I'd put money on it.

27 Jul 20 - 11:18 AM (#4066109)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Those squirrel proof bird feeders are a good laugh when a squirrel outwits them.

27 Jul 20 - 01:29 PM (#4066140)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Speaking of squirrels, I think the ones living around my house have become too inbred and are suffering from a genetic mental impairment. They're falling out of trees with astonishing regularity. It took about 55 years for me to witness just ONE squirrel falling from a tree. Now it seems to happen every couple of weeks. Gotta be a hereditary brain malfunction.

I suppose the squirrels are lucky that my house is back in the woods instead of near the road like most people's. If they aren't smart enough to do everyday squirrel stuff like climbing trees, there's no way they'd survive crossing the road.

27 Jul 20 - 05:18 PM (#4066173)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've noticed I see alot more pidgeons when I am poisoning Pidgeons in the park. You don't supose BWL is... nah.

Are they flying squirrels?

27 Jul 20 - 09:55 PM (#4066218)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Yes, they're flying squirrels, but they only know how to fly straight down.

27 Jul 20 - 10:01 PM (#4066219)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

pahdum bum-cymbal. I can be a good 2nd banana as long as the punch line nails it.

28 Jul 20 - 07:37 AM (#4066258)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I recieved the Galactic Overlord by laws by messenger and believe me it is like watching sausage being made, I thought they would be better than us. The following are the GEB By-Laws which do not include Music Management Rules:

The Seven Supreme Executive Galactic Overlords>
7:1.1 (198.1) The executive headquarters of the Master Spirits occupy the seven Paradise satellites of the Infinite Spirit Supply, which swing around the central Isle between the shining spheres of the Galactic Overlords and the innermost Taverns. These executive spheres are under the direction of the Supreme Executives, a group of seven who were Sanitized by the Father in law, Son in law, and the unknown Uncle in accordance with the specifications of the Seven Master Spirits for beings of a type that could function as their universal representative bag men .

7:1.2 (198.2) The Master Spirits maintain supplies with the various divisions of the superuniverse governments through these Supreme Executives. It is they who very largely determine the basic constitutive trends of the seven superuniverses. They are uniformly and divinely perfect, but they also possess diversity of personality much like the 7 dwarfs. They have no presiding head; each time they meet together, they choose one of their number to preside over that joint council with snacks. Periodically they binge journey to Paradise Resorts to sit in council with the Seven Master Intoxicating Spirits.

7:1.3 (198.3) The Seven Supreme Executives function as the administrative co-ordinators of the grand universe; they might be termed the board of managing directors of the Steve Bannon creation. They are not concerned with the internal affairs of Paradise Resorts, and they direct their limited spheres of Steve Miller activity through the Steve Shaw of the Circuits. Otherwise there are few limits to the scope of their supervision; they engage in the direction of things physical, intellectual, and spiritual; they see all, hear all, feel all, even grok all, that transpires in the seven superuniverses and associated Shell Corporations.

7:1.4 (2001) These Supreme Executives do not originate policies, nor do they modify universe procedures; they are concerned with the execution of the plans of divinity drugs promulgated by the Seven Master Spirit Distillaries. Neither do they interfere with the rule of the Ancients of Days in the superuniverses nor with the sovereignty of the Assisted Living Institutions in the local universes. They are the co-ordinating executives whose function it is to carry out the combined policies of all duly constituted rulers in the grand universe who sleep till noon and screws them all.

7:1.5 (2008) Each of the executives and the facilities of his sphere are devoted to the efficient administration of a single superuniverse. Supreme Executive Number One, functioning on executive sphere number one, is wholly occupied with the affairs of Ovarion prostitutes, and so on to Supreme Executive Number Seven, working from the seventh Paradise satellite of the Spirit and devoting his energies to the management of Sex, Gambling and Drugs. The name of this seventh sphere is Maxwell, for the Paradise Resort satellites of the Spirits have the same name, Bubba, as their incest related supersoldiers; in fact, the superintendants were all named after them, Bubba, Bubba Jr, Bubba double Jr. etc.

7:1.6 (2016) On the executive sphere of the seventh superuniverse the staff engaged in keeping straight the affairs of Ovarion sex workers who run into numbers beyond human comprehension and embraces practically every organ of celestial intercourse.

28 Jul 20 - 10:47 AM (#4066289)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Rap should print that out.

One bird feather was left behind in the bird bath with the fountain, so someone was brave enough to try it. The other bird bath has a number of feathers, so as a control group I see that most of them are still shy of the spurt of water.

I dismantled a crumbling squirrel drey (a word I've never used, but someone else applied it to a recent photo of this thing so I'm trying to remember to use it). Lots of polyfill from a destroyed patio seat (they need to thank the puppy for that) and tons of plastic grocery bags woven through it. The deteriorating plastic is probably the reason for the abandonment, and the location directly over a very large agave plant suggests that if my squirrels are falling out of the tree they're being impaled on the agave. They either all died falling out or got smart and moved on.

A final wildlife observation: No one I know would be this stupid but obviously there are a few.

28 Jul 20 - 11:39 AM (#4066295)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Some critters just ain't too smart when it comes to nesting sites. We once had a wicker cat bed on the screened porch. I had removed the porch door in order to paint it and, while it was off, a wren built a nest in the cat bed.

29 Jul 20 - 09:08 AM (#4066406)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

How bout flood plain houses
Ain't they neat
gettin dirty water
all over their feet.

Hurricane Jackass is headed toward 'Fluoride'?

29 Jul 20 - 10:11 PM (#4066504)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Back in '65 I was walkin' the levees for the flood, and it was a pretty good one. Bein' in the National Guard, I didn't have much say in the matter, but I was walkin' south of town and my very own brother (in the other NG company) was walkin' north of town.

Well, the levee broke north of town and flooded a bunch of prime bottomland. Farmer there had a $1 million line of credit (in 1965 this was a lot!) and a couple of brand-new championship bulls he'd just bought. The bulls and some other cattle drowned and his newly-planted 1,000 acres were covered with six feet of floodwater.

Eventually all the water ran off and his land dried out.

Next Spring he had a @2.5 million dollar line of credit and his insurance paid for the loss of his house, farm equipment, and suchlike. Why the increase? Because he now had better than three FEET of brand-new, super-fertile topsoil all over his land.

Now, to deliberately build a house -- just a house for a family -- in a floodplain or on a shore or somewhere like that, well, you pays yer money and you takes your chances.

30 Jul 20 - 09:01 AM (#4066552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ancient Egyptians finally used the Nile floods well. Will we?
Army Corps of Engineers General Xavier Pedite said
"Send X off to do this, send X to take care of that… take care of some little unimportant levee here, and there; pick somebody up at the airport. I’m the ACE and I was stepped over! … It ain’t the way I wanted it! I can handle things. I’m smart. Not like everybody says, like dumb. I’m smart and I want respect!"

30 Jul 20 - 09:59 AM (#4066563)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yup, yessir, that river's under control now!

30 Jul 20 - 02:55 PM (#4066607)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I have a virtual appointment with my rheumatologist next week. A big "whew" that I don't have to step on the scale in her office, but I have a "smart scale" here so who knows, it might rat me out.

I live just above a creek and pay flood insurance. We always keep our fingers crossed, though it's a flood zone on paper only, so far it has pretty much stayed in it's banks.

30 Jul 20 - 03:04 PM (#4066609)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I am so goaldarn lucky to not have a rhumatologist although mornings are stiffer than they used to be, not in a good way.

31 Jul 20 - 06:49 AM (#4066681)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Grandma ended up with 4 artificial joints.

31 Jul 20 - 05:53 PM (#4066758)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Artificial joints are what plastic people smoke to get high.

31 Jul 20 - 05:56 PM (#4066759)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I am sure that has never been written before in all of space time/

31 Jul 20 - 07:20 PM (#4066771)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Watch a baseball game and you may see statisics being made or an unlikely tremendous play so while we see the same game we each bring something different to the experience. Parts of the 'unlikely' IS enjoyment of the game. SO this is why baseball entertains us. It is a demonstration of the wierdness of quantum mechanics. It is true anyone who says they understand quantum mechanics - doesn't.

Sometimes it may even be a boring game, which is wierd in itself.
I've wondered about the split screen experiment since I was 13
Probabilities have shown us that we can get entangled with a destructive moron becoming President. We can complain when reality isn't rational BUT ITS NOT. Perhaps we should make a new kind of computer that uses spooky action at a distance and employ only entangled atoms - instead of electrons and calculate an accidental utopia just for grins and giggles.
But a game of all home runs would not appeal to us for long.
Wierdness is a strength And Not A Weakness.
It is our raison d'etre.

31 Jul 20 - 07:46 PM (#4066779)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Titanium joints are the things that end up in the pile of ashes after the house burns down and a corpse is discovered. Those serial numbers will turn up every time. And I had to go through a security scan at the courthouse just three weeks after surgery and it set the thing off, so I know they didn't substitute plastic instead of titanium.

31 Jul 20 - 08:42 PM (#4066791)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It's launched. The Idaho Legion launched Mission Against the Overlord's Bullying (MAOB, quite by accident) this morning at 0530 Zulu. Actually, it was right around 10:30 last night MDT, but it sounds cooler to give it in Zulu time. I can't tell you what the military-type hardware it contains, but among the least of the weaponry is an Silicon-Alcohol-Germanium-Gadolinium-Yttrium laser (SAGGY laser), thought up, designed, and produced by the Idaho Legion's team of cracked military scientists.

ONWARD! SAVE THE EARTH! DEFEND OUR MOTHER!

This message brought to you by the Idaho Legion. Contributions accepted.

31 Jul 20 - 10:42 PM (#4066803)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

MilliPutty-Alum-Germguiltium-Nickelodium-Ununpentium Magnesium lasers are banned in Maryland and are not sold on Amazon.

01 Aug 20 - 10:00 AM (#4066853)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The European model has our Hurricane tracking the ENTIRE EAST COAST but the Trump Magic Marker model keeps it entirely off shore.

01 Aug 20 - 12:45 PM (#4066877)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The SAGGY laser is powered by hurricanes, tornadoes, and hot air masses colliding with cold air masses. Much like Twitter posts, which is another energy source.

01 Aug 20 - 03:29 PM (#4066897)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The MAGNUM laser is powered by a quarter mile long extension cord.
It takes 10 men to drag the cord.

01 Aug 20 - 09:11 PM (#4066923)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

SAGGY is now in Earth-Moon Pair duocentric orbit, cutting a figure-eight in space. The launch, etc. was successful, and the brave people staffing the new Defense Station. They have no way to return to Earth, but trust me, they shan't be missed.

01 Aug 20 - 11:20 PM (#4066932)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

At first that was unexpected but its the new normal these days.
3 Astronauts only have 48 hours for a reentry but like you say, you pay your money and take your chances. We are all in the same boat with limited air.

02 Aug 20 - 04:56 PM (#4067046)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Being in the same boat with limited air is a mixed metaphor. We can either be in a boat with a serious problem like no paddle, or we can be in a confined place with limited air. Lack of air is not a problem one associates with boats. Unless the boat is a submarine.

02 Aug 20 - 09:05 PM (#4067066)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

After 18 previous attempts, the Idaho Legion is pleased and proud to announce the orbiting of the defense satellite Crown Of Victory In Defense! COVIID-19 is currently encircling the globe, adding its powerful defenses (defences outside of the United States) to SAGGY station's already massive defenses (see above).

03 Aug 20 - 07:18 AM (#4067095)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We the people are on the same page more than in days past.
For me it has been a learning experience that has gone full circle. It only took global warming, global pandemics, global disasters and global leadership that starves and sickens anyone with funds less than millions of dollars. Pinched to oblivion this is a turning point. The Pendulum can swing no further up and is on the way back down. In other words history will repeat. We must push the boulder back up the hill. We have given the smart people a chance to lead, we have given the dumb people a chance to lead and can now compare.
I hope that in hundreds of years our smart people today will seem dumb compared to the future folks as the social pendulum continues to trace its wave. Curiously humans will not do it alone. It will involve a wide spectrum of life itself from galactic overlords to virus.

03 Aug 20 - 08:00 AM (#4067102)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The pendulum through time https://youtu.be/VXwYLKFJoUk
It is similar to the solar system's orbit around the galaxy, the same as the spiral shape of DNA, the same as the path of sperm.
Its the way my minds eye sees the path of time but its hard to explain in words.

03 Aug 20 - 09:26 AM (#4067109)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hell even the path of a massless chargeless photon is helical.
If you think of a tip of a pendulum as a particle, the path it takes is a wave. Particle waves with various charges, spins and mass is all everything is within the bounds of space and time.

That is, except for the power of the Schwartz, which like dark matter
and dark energy is invisible to us traveling probably in reverse helical spin.. Oh, by the way, that stuff halfwa between dark and light energy are those trillions of neutrinos passing through your brain every second. Neutrinos have three favorite flavors chocolate straw....
and guess what... they travel in helical spirals

03 Aug 20 - 10:26 AM (#4067115)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

So everything moves like a coiled spring looks? I figured that out from a mental exercise of following the Moon's orbit through space when I was 12. It was a cool thing to do even if it didn't help my arithmetic grades.

03 Aug 20 - 11:07 AM (#4067123)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There is a test one does on old spools of thread to see if they are still viable for sewing. Unwrap a few inches and give it a sharp yank; if it snaps off, it's too brittle. I had a lovely box full of thread from my mother's house and it added up to 96 spools, many of them wooden (none so old as stone, she wasn't born in the dark ages).

Did you know that you can sell this now-worthless thread to people on eBay? Maybe they buy it for the spools (but quite a few of mine are also plastic). I looked around and have a price in mind and some lovely photos of these defunct tubes of cotton. If I learn later that is there some fabulous craft idea that brings in megabuck$ for items made with these old spools, I'll take my troubles down to the Legion Hovel and we can discuss where to find more old useless spools of thread.

03 Aug 20 - 12:26 PM (#4067134)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Or you can go to the Legion Hovel and recruit a few armed and drunken degenerates to help you recover your spools under the pretense that the transaction was fraudulent because the purchaser didn't tell you she was going to resell them for something approaching the Gross National Product of Albania.

03 Aug 20 - 08:56 PM (#4067199)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

There are no degenerates at the Hovel. No one is de-ing. Everyone there was born that way and can't generate any further down the ladder..

03 Aug 20 - 09:23 PM (#4067205)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

So, would that make the ungenerates?

04 Aug 20 - 09:02 AM (#4067251)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

They are the peak of the valley of nongenerates. Were they to slide further they would be puddles of amoebic dysentery slime or some such. They actually have too much intellect to be viruses.

04 Aug 20 - 09:43 AM (#4067256)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

Why does the word "skies" even exist? There's only one sky!

Is there an exoplanet somewhere that has multiple skies? How would that work? Are they stored in a closet somewhere and some guy decides which one to use on a particular day? "I think we'll have the puce sky on Monday and the lavender sky on Tuesday." Personally, I wouldn't want to live someplace that has a puce sky, even if it was only on Monday.

04 Aug 20 - 11:53 PM (#4067334)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Never been in is a dust storm, have ya?

05 Aug 20 - 12:57 AM (#4067337)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Are you saying dust storms turn the sky puce? How horrible! Then we must ban dust storms! Puceness should be avoided at all costs!

05 Aug 20 - 07:01 AM (#4067357)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Along with banning storms we should also move earthquake faults, put sprinkler systems in dry forests and raise the water table.

People are saying the stratosphere and ionosphere are a waste of skies.

06 Aug 20 - 10:31 AM (#4067486)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

People also say that the troposphere is not spherical and probably unnecessary.

06 Aug 20 - 07:31 PM (#4067549)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Flatulosphere: The layer of the atmosphere where really potent farts are permanently exiled.

06 Aug 20 - 07:35 PM (#4067550)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Flautophone: A guitarist who thinks s/he can play brass.

07 Aug 20 - 04:12 PM (#4067643)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If you see this man please notify the Federal Bureau.

08 Aug 20 - 12:26 PM (#4067725)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A new diverse political movement is reminding me of the Tea Party. The DIE party is dedicated to DENY IGNORE and EVADE the law.
Their credo and legal defense is the first ammendment. To them the right to lie, liberty and pusuit of happiness is guaranteed by the constitooshun. They have risen from the ashes of the NRA, arson at BLM protests and armed no mask protests. The DIE party is attracting racists, narcicists and the stupidly proud. Their emblem is a human skull which makes membership cool quick and easy.

08 Aug 20 - 12:28 PM (#4067726)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

All of those Bureaus and Departments and Agencies are lying low right now, hoping to avoid the gaze of the Orange one. You know that back room at the Hovel that usually is used for storing old WWII Army/Navy store gear and cots for the Next Big One? They've been coming and going there to meet out of sight of the D.C. crowd. I think there are cots made up if you look at the back of the room. I hear the Joint Chiefs of Staff had extra keys made to the back door.

08 Aug 20 - 03:00 PM (#4067741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thats the spirit but also true.
Give away projects are running out of time and are opting for briefcases/dufflebags of cash to avoid a paper trail.

Those dedicated to snack food and obiesity belong to the EAT SHIT party and are destined to join the DIE party.
There are plans to wage a patriotic war with only AMERICAN made products. After looking into it we would have to go to war with only My Pillow, Car floor mats, Weber Grills, Airstream Trailers, Gibson Guitars, Wilson Footballs, Chesapeake Bay Candles and Colt pistols. Everything else uses at least some foriegn components.

08 Aug 20 - 09:51 PM (#4067768)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Colt firearms contain steel made Elsewhere. Many of the machines that make them are made Elsewhere. There ARE gunsmiths who make their arms from scratch, including making their own steel and using machines that were made either by them or truly historic pieces.

A flintlock will set you back up to USD 20,000, cheapest about 1,500. French and English gunflints are well thought of, but getting your own from nearby hills will work. Chickenshit makes good saltpeter, but it takes awhile and the neighbors might complain when you start pouring "chamber lye" over your nitrate beds in the backyard. Domestic sulphur and charcoal are easily had, but the best charcoal is stuff you make yourself from willow.

REAL Americans make their OWN firearms.

I am not a REAL American.

09 Aug 20 - 04:37 AM (#4067779)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What I have learned of new or old firearms I either learned from you or 'Pawn Stars'.

09 Aug 20 - 11:23 AM (#4067804)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Good Sci Fi reflects social issues and cutting edge and future science.
I'm exploring the concept of a possible choice being made by a conscious entity who can slip between many worlds of Quantum possibilities as an evolutionary advancement. In the process in the discovery of the many worlds multiverse it was found the number of multiverses are actually far from infinite.
It turns out that most universes burn out from a wave collapse.
Quantum events too small to diverge significantly, fail to develop.
'Rick' is the being that can traverse universes as easily as slipping sideways in an impossibly narrow gap. He finds he is faced with a choice between a nuclear holocaust on Earth, or the worst possible President ever to take power. It turns out to be a more difficult choice than at first thought.

09 Aug 20 - 01:33 PM (#4067823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You should know enough about firearms to handle them safely and, preferably, to unload them. "There are just too damned many guns out there," said my mother. "I want my kids to know enough to be safe."

09 Aug 20 - 04:53 PM (#4067840)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I don't know enough.
In my out of bound limits vingnette, The unwitting villains in one universe is Admiral Palsy and General Betrayus and in this universe is Steve
Bannon.

09 Aug 20 - 07:26 PM (#4067847)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I do not know how to unload a bazooka. But, since the chances of my ever needing to unload a bazooka are vanishingly small, I don't worry about it very much. It's not like I'm going to walk out the door in the morning and someone is going to thrust a loaded bazooka into my arms and say, "Here, you unload this while I go get another one!"

09 Aug 20 - 09:24 PM (#4067855)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Re-attach the safety clip to the exhaust of the rocket OR use a grounded (to a grounded rod!) paperclip. Put the weapon in the "safe" or "please don't shoot!" status or cut the wires from from the magneto to the trigger. The CAREFULLY grasp the rear of the rocket and CAREFULLY remove it. GENTLY lay it on the ground and get the hell away from it! That thing contains a shaped charge of about a half kilogram of C4 or TNT. The easiest and safest way to unload it (for you) is to pull the trigger and don't have any body parts behind the backblast of the rocket. Your neighbors might not speak to you ever again, especially if you hit their chickenhouse. Just remember to keep yourself clear of the backblast from rockets, recoilless rifles, claymore mines, fougasse, and so on. There is also no truth to the rumor that C-4 suppositories "will clean ya out real good."

10 Aug 20 - 06:23 AM (#4067874)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There is a recall on some C-4
suppositories. This country has regulations coming out of its ass.

10 Aug 20 - 07:15 AM (#4067877)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Calmol-4, for when you need to calm your ass right down!

10 Aug 20 - 11:54 AM (#4067898)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

When my ass needs calming I hit him right between the ears with a two-by-four. Never a bray outa him after that.

10 Aug 20 - 02:20 PM (#4067905)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In these days of challenging procrastination and xxxxxxxation isolation, I need some grand examples of WILL POWER.
You know something for get up and go.
I gave up after only coming up with things that haven't happened yet-
like Ruth Ginzburg passing away one day after Trump is defeated.
However Fred Trump's 'WILL' POWER gave Donald enough $ to be President.

11 Aug 20 - 08:16 AM (#4067980)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

RBG needs to hang on until after Biden's inauguration, not just until after Trump loses the election. If you don't think Trump and McConnell are big enough assholes to ignore the "Thurmond Rule" and try to push a SCOTUS nomination through during a lame duck period, there's something wrong with your thinker.

That it has never been done before is not due to a law or Constitutional provision. The Thurmond Rule is more of a "gentlemen's agreement". Trump and McConnell are not gentlemen.

11 Aug 20 - 11:51 AM (#4067995)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm drinking my later-than-usual morning cuppa tea out of my RBG cup (they sell them at Fishs Eddy in NYC) and aiming a force field of good thoughts to surround her. And every so often I think through what I would say if I was ever face-to-face with the orange one and had his attention - what insult could I offer that is so concise and to the point and so clear that even he would understand it was an insult.

Have at it.

11 Aug 20 - 06:19 PM (#4068057)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Classless, ignorant, unloved bully -- assuming that you know what thatmeans! May you defecate in your trousers during your upcoming nomination acceptance speech, and may the stink be such that it carries over television and Twitter!

12 Aug 20 - 08:50 PM (#4068178)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There will be no damning with faint praise for our Donald - Kamala will mop the floor with him. We can trust her to say what needs to be said.

13 Aug 20 - 09:39 AM (#4068220)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

Do I strike you as the type of person who really gives a shit whether or not his iPhone is backed up?

13 Aug 20 - 02:54 PM (#4068260)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You don't strike me as the type of person who would have an iPhone.

13 Aug 20 - 04:43 PM (#4068271)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Oh, I do have an iPhone, but there's not a damned thing on it I'd miss if the thing should die.

Seriously, here's the thing: I live too far out of town for regular broadband Internet service. I have a personal hotspot through my cellular provider. It works well, but I only get 15 GB per month at "full speed". After that, the speed throttles way down. So, I try to avoid unnecessary expenditures of bandwidth.

Backing up an iPhone requires that the phone be connected to a WIFI network. This is a bit silly in my case since the phone and the personal hotspot both use the same cellular provider and are on the same billing plan. The phone has unlimited high speed access, but Apple won't let me use the phone's own unlimited GBs of data transfer for backup. It requires that I connect through WIFI and use up some of my precious 15 GB.

So, the phone never gets backed up and I don't care.

13 Aug 20 - 08:42 PM (#4068286)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Apart from my contact list there's not a lot to lose.

13 Aug 20 - 09:03 PM (#4068288)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I have this backup device called "a piece of paper" with all my contacts' information.

And any photos I take that I actually care about are copied to my laptop.

14 Aug 20 - 09:16 AM (#4068336)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I've probably lost track of all of the places my photos backup to. Microsoft, Dropbox, and I think Google has a hand in some photo storage. An embarrassment of riches. And my details like that are in a three-ring notebook.

14 Aug 20 - 09:30 PM (#4068410)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Lots of places to go after this plague is over. Back to the Arctic! Viva la Aurora!

15 Aug 20 - 01:32 AM (#4068416)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Places that may have changed with the absence of people (for the better, we hope!)

15 Aug 20 - 08:04 AM (#4068428)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

After surviving the plague, I would like to round out my education by taking a grand tour of places which afford visitors opportunities to survive famine, pestilence, and war.

15 Aug 20 - 12:54 PM (#4068463)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here's a question I just asked myself.

A wildfire is QUICKLY approaching you home and you have 30 minutes to evacuate. You have "grab and go" boxes containing insurance, family pictures, and other important papers; you can easily grab your laptop and the backup drives; your toiletries and medicines are simple to grab -- but you have room and weight for no more than six books.

What six books would you take? The rest of what you own will be ashes very quickly and you gotta load and scoot!

16 Aug 20 - 10:53 AM (#4068546)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

New coinage inspired by the current resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave:

"Overflowing lack of compassion."

Example: "His overflowing lack of compassion is exceeded only by his overflowing abdomen."

16 Aug 20 - 10:21 PM (#4068603)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

I wish mothers would stop using the possibility of an emergency room visit as a reason to wear clean underwear. If you should wind up in the ER due to a serious accident, they're going to cut all your clothes off anyway, So why waste a good pair of clean underwear? If they're going to be sacrificed, just wear dirty ones. In fact, you should make it a point to wear dirty underwear any time you get an a car, just in case you're in an accident.

16 Aug 20 - 10:22 PM (#4068604)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Theme song.

17 Aug 20 - 10:09 AM (#4068630)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Campaign song.

17 Aug 20 - 10:13 AM (#4068631)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCP76JTY4kE

The definitive rendition of a Certain Candidate's campaign song.

17 Aug 20 - 01:58 PM (#4068654)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It's Monday. All week feels like Monday. I have a couple of birthdays coming up in a little over a week but I think both of us are simply going to stay the same age and try again next year.

18 Aug 20 - 06:43 AM (#4068703)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

My Mondays are now 165 hours long. The only part of the week that isn't Monday is the three hours on Saturday evening that I spend playing socially-distanced music on a friend's porch. Monday begins immediately thereafter and runs until 8 PM the following Saturday.

My phone still says there are other days. For example, it says it's currently Tuesday. But I don't believe it. If I were to do that OS update that I've been putting off, it would probably say "Monday" every time I looked at it.

18 Aug 20 - 10:23 AM (#4068717)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Something keeps telling me that it's January 15, 1969 and I'm stuck to go on a night patrol in the Republic of Korea. -37F, winds at >40mph, and lots of snow, and what I want to do is go to the NCO Club and drink hot toddies. I could get hurt out there!

18 Aug 20 - 03:12 PM (#4068750)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Still having dreams when I suddenly realize the people around me are too damned close. You'd think at least in your dreams people could approach safely!

18 Aug 20 - 07:58 PM (#4068772)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I've got the cough. On the bright side we hope its cancer.

18 Aug 20 - 10:06 PM (#4068787)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

1,300!!!

19 Aug 20 - 10:07 AM (#4068828)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Stay safe, Don.

19 Aug 20 - 08:17 PM (#4068884)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

367 California wildfires are adding to my coughing here in Idaho. Doesn't include the homegrown ones, which have burn a couple thousand acres around town so far this summer.

20 Aug 20 - 09:37 AM (#4068940)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

A big plastic factory on the far east side of the county has been on fire for several days. The general direction of wind is NW so over downtown Fort Worth. I suspect everyone within a four county area has inhaled incompletely combusted hydrocarbons this week. Soon the air will be filled with ragweed pollen. The face masks are something we should probably be wearing anyway, even without COVID-19.

20 Aug 20 - 09:54 AM (#4068945)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We carefully watch the AQI. I change the furnace filters (HEPA) more often than I need to. We even "sanitize" the blades of the ceiling fan. AC isn't high on my list of faves, but it's better than 100F heat and pollen. Recently I discovered that I'm allergic to the news.

20 Aug 20 - 11:01 AM (#4068952)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Did you know kiwi fruit have stiff, sharp, microscopic fibers in them that temporarily attach to your throat like tiny cactus thorns? It's not really noticeable if you only eat one fruit, but if you buy a marked down bag of ten and eat five at one setting, it'll feel like your throat is going to close up. Trust me on this. Do not attempt to verify by personal experimentation.

20 Aug 20 - 03:14 PM (#4068977)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Florida is going forward with the release of millions of genetically modified mosquitos at the peak of the pandemic. What could possibly go wrong? There have been genetic experiments that have gone wrong

Pioneers who did it first so you don't have to

Add Steve Bannon to the list of pioneers who was arrested aboard a Chinese exile's yacht while in a giant hot tub filled with caviar.
What struck officials odd was that he was wearing 2 shirts.

20 Aug 20 - 04:00 PM (#4068980)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The Mudcat E book will soon be unveiled with its collection of essays, stories, musings, PM exchanges, candid conversations, compromising photographs, and audio and video (semi-musical) clips, as well as interactive quizzes, is unlike anything else available when it comes to the e-book experience. Folk Fans and musicologists will delight in its direct access to the brilliant, wacky minds of these popular and talented authors/musicians. There’s plenty of teasing, riffing and ragging on each other, but at the heart of the book are these writers’ innermost sentiments about the friendships formed, the love found, and the tragedy of losing to cancer the person who brought them together.
Unfortunately many posts by Amos will not be included due to an abundance of hope of future publication profits.

20 Aug 20 - 06:47 PM (#4068999)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

That's okay, I have an autographed copy of his book.

20 Aug 20 - 07:08 PM (#4069005)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think I un-hid Amos' poems after he died.

21 Aug 20 - 09:43 AM (#4069057)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Have yourself a microscopic Christmas
Let your heart beat on
From now on our virus will go out of sight
Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Respect blacks and gays
From now on Christmas is just a click away
Here we are as in olden days
Like pandemic golden days of yore
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Are all far from us, once more
Through the years we all will be together
If vac-cines allow
Hang the Donald Trump upon the highest bough
And have yourself a merry little Christmas
Have yourself a little tiny Christmas
So have yourself a merry little tiny itty bitty Christmas now

21 Aug 20 - 10:05 AM (#4069060)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You losed Amos' poetry upon the world again??????

21 Aug 20 - 12:43 PM (#4069078)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

You can still read everything in the original MOAB - you just have to get there via a search and read it one post at a time. So do a search on Amos (and Amos as a guest, because we could post in there that way also until recently) and figure out which posts are poetry. It took a while to hide them (he told me which, so I should see if I still have that list).

21 Aug 20 - 05:15 PM (#4069089)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

E book Mudcat addendums (only a nickel) will include the best of Maggie, Little Hawk/Chongo, Richard Fielding, Bill D, Spaw, BWL, Cat Laughing, Rapaire and chief musicologist and crypto fascist Joe Offer. :^/

22 Aug 20 - 07:23 AM (#4069142)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My old posts do not even appear in the 'worst of' section but instead are in a separate not ready for prime time catagory called 'sarcasm satire and sacriledge'.

22 Aug 20 - 01:55 PM (#4069190)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I want to go outside but the AQI hovers near the "Hazardous" level. I wish to thank California.

22 Aug 20 - 06:57 PM (#4069219)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

It just gets weirder and weirder....

We have two tropical storms, both predicted to become hurricanes, in The Gulf of Mexico for the first time in history. If that's not enough, current forecasts have them both making landfall on the Louisiana coast in the same spot 24 hours apart.

In any other year, that asteroid that's headed for Earth the day before Election Day wouldn't concern me at all....

22 Aug 20 - 09:42 PM (#4069233)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I went outside and took a short walk around the yard. I don't think I've ever seen so many grasshoppers in such a small area in my life!

22 Aug 20 - 10:17 PM (#4069234)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Uh oh. Is this the August catastrophe or has the September catastrophe arrived early?

23 Aug 20 - 08:41 AM (#4069304)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

astroid? its hardly bigger than me.
Prepare for Harvey like rain.

23 Aug 20 - 09:37 AM (#4069307)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The CA fires are said to equal the size of RI.
I've been to Rhode Island and its huge.

23 Aug 20 - 09:51 AM (#4069311)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Two hurricanes possibly slamming into the Gulf Coast soon, but it won't deter the windbags on the east coast (the Hatch Act isn't sparing the federal White House staff from party politics this week). Knocking the GOP off of the front page would be nice, but they're like the worst grass burs, once they're stuck on clothing or skin nothing is very effective against them.

23 Aug 20 - 11:59 AM (#4069331)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

The word "holdup" makes perfect sense when describing the robbery of a stagecoach. If a stagecoach is moving from one place to another, its progress needs to be held up for a robbery to occur.

But why are bank robberies also called "holdups"? Banks don't move. They aren't going anywhere.

23 Aug 20 - 01:34 PM (#4069336)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Back to 14 days of quarantine - in the house away from everyone.

I've had to bypass the Hatch Act with nuance regarding yard signs
like a Halloween picture of Trump attacked by torches and pitchforks.

Mike Lindell of 'my pillow' isn't selling pillows like he used to so he now sells Oleandrin drops to put on your pillow for a magic 'Trump Approved' Covid cure. I bet he would do better selling My Dildo.

24 Aug 20 - 07:15 PM (#4069500)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Hi, Mom! I'm cooking dinner! We're having sausage made from Italians and unexploded shells in a tomato sauce with things in it.

24 Aug 20 - 07:57 PM (#4069505)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I made Chicken a la King with Trump sauce and China Flu id rice.

Trump sauce is made with fictious ingredients and stolen money.
China Flu id rice is just cooked rice in a blender with soy.
The Pandemic version is made the same but you don't cook the chicken.

25 Aug 20 - 08:06 AM (#4069562)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We also enjoyed a sausage made from that nasty kid who lived next door: bratworst, we called it.

25 Aug 20 - 10:01 AM (#4069574)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Stay safe, Don. Are you having symptoms or were just in the proximity of someone with COVID?

Thinking about a foray out for fresh vegetables, but it's late enough now the stores will have regular shoppers, not just sleepy seniors who had to arrive at the crack of dawn for Senior Shopping.

Maybe tomorrow. There is still stuff in the freezer.

25 Aug 20 - 10:49 AM (#4069584)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I tried bratwurst for the 1st time ever Sunday. I don't like it.
There is only a typical morning cough but there is distancing going on because my wife with no discussion went to support her recently widowed oldest sister in rural Oregon, which is in her character regarding family. My only good memory of the deceased was during a family photo when he laughed at my joke that 'extraneous DNA' always stand in the back row. After 20 years the joke still works.

25 Aug 20 - 01:50 PM (#4069597)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There are many varieties of bratwurst using different mixes of meats and seasonings. I'm partial to smoky beef brats.

25 Aug 20 - 05:57 PM (#4069632)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Yes, Donuel, I noticed that post
reporting that you had 'the cough.'
You are doing well to be prudent about it.

As to Rhode Island:
I've been to Rhode Island,
and a lot of it is ocean water.

25 Aug 20 - 06:45 PM (#4069634)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its a good place to go submarine spotting, highway race, raise chickens and probably smuggle. *The pandemic is the main thing, the fire is the second and coming in third is the hurricane. Fourth is the open season for police shooting black people. The long standing crisis is the coup against democracy.

*in order of lethality

deadly bratwurst is #1354 on the lethal list.

25 Aug 20 - 09:07 PM (#4069640)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Funny you should mention submarines around Rhode Island,
because that reminds me of something else actually.
My brief acquaintance with Rhode Island,
especially the closer you get to the shore and the Long Island Sound,
is that there is more to it than
Newport and those impossible mansions rising seemingly out of the water's edge.

In places like Greater Providence, with its many suburbs,
or Pawtucket to the north and east,
there are whole enclaves of people who are
Italian-Americans by way of New York and New Jersey,
and submarines to them are sandwiches,
often very peppery spicy ones.
Don't even get them started on pizzas ...

25 Aug 20 - 09:08 PM (#4069641)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

... and I just remembered ChanteyLass,
the Mudcatter who lives in Rhode Island.

25 Aug 20 - 09:40 PM (#4069647)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I thought ChanteyLass lived in New Mexico. I'm probably thinking of someone else.

My niece married into a well-to-do Boston family (a house in Cambridge/Harvard Square, etc.) and they have a beach place in Rhode Island. I poked around on Google maps. It's in the realm of "just a house" a block or two from the beach, but I'm sure even those don't go for a song. Every one of them seems to be built large with plenty of bedrooms for family visiting in the summer.

Don mentioned a cough before, I was hoping it was a passing thing and there are no symptoms now? Anyway, you don't need to discuss it in the open thread, but stay well, my friend!

26 Aug 20 - 09:58 AM (#4069704)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Thanks to California we've been coughing AND staying inside the shelter of the HVAC filters wherever we can. This is the first day in a week that the AQI is "healthy."

In the last week I've given away three human skulls, two matching mandibles, and two human femurs, and a boatload of trophies for head-bowling, bone-baseball, and the other sports the Legion has engaged in over the years.

I knew only the owner of one of the skulls in his pre-skull days, a noxious old f*rt named Samworthy. He's the one who started the rout at the Battle of Tinymatters, where General Sothoth burned all the crops so they wouldn't fall into the hands of the German Army. That was in Idaho in 1967.

26 Aug 20 - 02:06 PM (#4069720)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Our air quality is about to shift to wet and blowy, a one-two hurricane punch. We're usually on the fringes of where the weather hits, so I'm hoping that trend continues.

26 Aug 20 - 03:23 PM (#4069726)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

No irritation or infection. I started smoking last week so my cillia are pissed off. Quitting again is in order when in home quaranine is over. Maybe I'll write a Film Noire story about the hunting down of the Post Master General.

26 Aug 20 - 05:25 PM (#4069741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I mentioned the pilot wave phenomenon regarding quantum strangenss that traces a future course and motion - the total opposite of the wake behind a boat.
pilot waves you can see pushing a particle.

Another view over time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmC0ygr08tE
If you will, we are a surfing in an ocean of time.

ABSTRACT

The investigation of dynamical systems has revealed a deep-rooted difference between waves and objects regarding temporal reversibility and particlelike objects. In nondissipative chaos, the dynamic of waves always remains time reversible, unlike that of particles. Here, we explore the dynamics of a wave-particle entity. It consists in a drop bouncing on a vibrated liquid bath, self-propelled and piloted by the surface waves it generates. This walker, in which there is an information exchange between the particle and the wave, can be analyzed in terms of a Turing machine with waves as the information repository. The experiments reveal that in this system, the drop can read information backwards while erasing it. The drop can thus backtrack on its previous trajectory. A transient temporal reversibility, restricted to the drop motion, is obtained in spite of the system being both dissipative and chaotic.

https://www.quantamagazine.org/fluid-experiments-support-deterministic-pilot-wave-quantum-theory-20140624/

With a little imagination you may see why I believe in a 3D model of time on a quantum scale.

Since I was 14 I always wanted know why the 2 slit experiment suggested a particle wave at 2 places at once. I'm glad to 'SEE' a clear cut answer. This news is 10 years old in the visual experiment and the de Broglio theory is 100 years old, so its not like gravity waves being discovered.

I have even done this in my kitchen. Just like this guy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIyTZDHuarQ

26 Aug 20 - 05:59 PM (#4069743)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I kinda already knew that life/reality is both random and partially deterministic. I've even noticed the tiny time loops by whatever name want to call it. It's not all deja vu. Its not all deja vu.

27 Aug 20 - 09:22 AM (#4069838)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

kids say the darndest things
adults flaunt their collected bias'
seniors have no audience for wisdom
and the living speak for the dead
but there are a special few who listen

27 Aug 20 - 08:05 PM (#4069909)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Rapparee, are the grasshoppers still around?

27 Aug 20 - 09:58 PM (#4069915)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yes. One attacked me today. He won't hop again in grass or anywhere else.

29 Aug 20 - 09:04 AM (#4070049)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I was in the 1956 Colorado grasshopper plague. The biggest danger was driving on slick grasshopper guts right off the road

29 Aug 20 - 09:13 AM (#4070051)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The smell of dead grasshoppers and crickets is distinctive. We had a couple of really bad years in Central Texas back in the early 1980s and the municipality would spray at night. You'd go to a store and walk past piles of dead bugs.

We almost had a dead squirrel yesterday. The girls are beginning to coordinate their routine and they were within a whisker of catching one reckless squirrel that didn't decide it would be smartest to stay up the tree. Dead squirrels stink also, though when I find those things I toss them into the creek for the turtles and fish or bury them in the compost pile.

29 Aug 20 - 09:47 PM (#4070115)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I counted 12 grasshoppers on a 10 x 10 slab of concrete this afternoon.
Tomorrow around 10 a.m. MDT I shall engage in chemical warfare, doing my best to avoid bees, etc. I do not care how many box elder bugs also bite the dust. DEATH TO GRASSHOPPERS (since I can't use live bait.)

30 Aug 20 - 07:58 AM (#4070155)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If you allow the natural world in you begin to see how the natural world treats you differently as if latent ancient DNA expresses knowledge that allows an interplay within and outside you. You see differently as though even the organization of a grasshopper cycle is more than the sum of its parts. The parts consist of a squad and multiple squads form a brigade that transforms plant life into flying protein packaged in chitin that need not go to waste. You can almost see their ancient contribution to a biome which is now extinct but was very much in harmony in their day. They were the food to new giant avian species in variations beyond belief millions of years ago
"Now you know the rest of the story"

30 Aug 20 - 06:40 PM (#4070190)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

They're also edible by humans. I've even eaten roasted grasshoppers. At the moment they are doing me more damage than I will do them.

01 Sep 20 - 01:11 AM (#4070285)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think taking out a lot of box elder bugs is also a worthwhile enterprise. I set up a mosquito trap this afternoon; it's passive, a bucket of water with some floating vegetation (weeds pulled today) that will rot and make the stagnant water all the more inviting to mosquitoes. Whose eggs will not survive the Bacillus thuringiensis israelii (mosquito dunk) in the water.

01 Sep 20 - 06:20 AM (#4070314)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Do you hear the grasshopper ?

01 Sep 20 - 07:19 AM (#4070327)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The western and mid western right wing militias are now in competition with each other. Some ride in pick up truck beds shooting mace and paintball guns into demonstrators. Some show up with live ammo. They are defending themselves and Trump, their excuser and chief.
Escalation will culminate in intensifying a fear of going to the polls. Militas are correct in assuming they have most police on their side. The use of the term civil war is discouraged and it is said that we are a country at war with itself. More blood may be shed as the election draws closer and Trump throws more troops into Portland and Chicago. It maybe won't be as bad as I think but it could make Trump President for four more years as more nazi like folk heros are created and memorialized while ignoring the dead mad crazy democrats and blacks. At least strategists like Steve Miller, McConnel, Bannon and Trump probably hope so.

Yesterday I watched from my parked car as a policeman in a cruiser detained an apparant exhausted vagrant and homeless black man and called for back up of two more police vehicles. There was no search or abuse that I witnessed but I did not not approach or obstruct the police and left early. There was simply the appearance and fear by the police. Even a firetruck showed up but soon left the scene. I feel like things are on a hair trigger. Perhaps it was just a humanitarian call to help the black man? If you didn't know, the police can now call paramedics to administer 500 mg of Ketamine to suspects. It has been fatal to small people but only renders larger people unconscious.
Things are moving just slow enough that Americans are getting used to it. It remains that Trump is the only one calling balls and strikes be it about violence or the pandemic. I guess I don't trust Trump to be Umpire and Chief.

01 Sep 20 - 03:07 PM (#4070378)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

1351

01 Sep 20 - 03:14 PM (#4070379)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Edward III of England institutes the Treason Act of { 1351 },
defining treason in English law. It is currently one of the earliest statues still in force under English law. ...
April 8 – Hundred Years' War: At the Battle of Taillebourg the French are defeated by the English.

01 Sep 20 - 06:10 PM (#4070392)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

1352: The Black Death is slowly dying out in England and Europe. Flagellants discover that it really hurts!

02 Sep 20 - 12:48 PM (#4070490)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I read this morning in The New York Times that some basic and inexpensive steroids are helping people who had severe cases of COVID-19 recover. Not recommended for mild cases. Now lets see what kind of BS Trump calls on behalf of Prednisone and it's family of magic bullets (but you have to be careful with them and taper off - that's the part that requires patience of patients.)

02 Sep 20 - 10:31 PM (#4070550)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Prednisone and similar drugs can send blood sugars through the roof -- and beyond. If you're diabetic, be very, very careful.

03 Sep 20 - 05:01 PM (#4070659)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Go BIG 10 or go home

04 Sep 20 - 02:42 PM (#4070747)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Big 10 what?

04 Sep 20 - 04:47 PM (#4070769)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I see. One third of the college football players who contracted Covid 19 suffered inflamation of the heart muscle as well as other organs.
Sometimes the inflamation goes away on its own. The head coach of Penn State U. was willing to err on the side of caution and stop the school's seasonal games.

04 Sep 20 - 09:23 PM (#4070797)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh. Football. I see.

05 Sep 20 - 08:13 AM (#4070841)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mid 2021 I expect a Covid vaccine wil be available for nearly a quarter of all Americans. My adverse reaction to Ford's swine flu vaccine was a one in 10 million reaction so don't worry about phase 3 trials and safety. Rare events may occur but unless Trump is involved you will be safe.

07 Sep 20 - 08:35 AM (#4071063)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM!! Gitcherass back up where you belong! Second from the bottom indeed!!! Never in all my born days....

07 Sep 20 - 10:32 AM (#4071072)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

This is MOAB Annex post # 1362.

1362 was the year in which The English Act made English, rather than French, the official language in law courts. If it weren't for 1362, we'd have to try to argue our way out of traffic fines in French!

"Je n'allais pas trop vite!"

07 Sep 20 - 05:58 PM (#4071115)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mon avocat dit, "Cherchez la femme! Y los dinero!"

08 Sep 20 - 11:33 AM (#4071191)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Voulez vous couchez avec moi votre honour?

08 Sep 20 - 04:15 PM (#4071219)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Here comes the mature pandemic. Even with the downsized administration numbers we are at 1,000 deaths a day and 6.2 million contagious infections in the USA. The total number of deaths could double by Jan. 1st. As Rap said the real number of deaths may never be known. Just as people are exhausted of keeping their guard up we will be going indoors, kids to schools, bars to open and gathering at the yule log, all while the number of infections sky rocket. Some call it the second wave. I call it the lingering Trump disaster. LTD

08 Sep 20 - 04:19 PM (#4071220)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Despite my doom and gloom post I'm surprisingly in a good mood.
Watching things go down the tubes is the ultimate entertainment:^)

09 Sep 20 - 06:41 PM (#4071367)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Good News
The FDA said Phoenix Biotechnology provided evidence of a history of medicinal use of Nerium oleander (a sweet smelling but deadly flower leaves and stems) extracts and some evidence of preclinical and clinical studies, but the safety evidence was not "qualitatively and quantitatively" related to oleandrin as a supplement.
"Studies performed in advanced cancer patients generally cannot establish the safety of your ingredient in its intended population of normal healthy adults, and you did not provide any information to indicate that such extrapolation between different populations would be scientifically valid," the FDA's letter said.
The FDA's letter did not mention using the extract as a treatment for Covid-19.
My Pillow Guy Mike Lindell, who has no scientific background or medical training, has said previously he was so enthusiastic about the product as a Covid-19 treatment that he had started taking the extract as a prophylactic and has encouraged his friends to do the same.
He had brought his research to Housing and Urban Development Secretary Dr. Ben Carson, a member of the White House Coronavirus Task Force. Lindell said in July that Carson was "just amazed," and thought "it was very exciting seeing all the data."
After Lindell met with Trump in July, he described the President's response to the extract as "enthusiastic." Lindell told CNN in July that Trump wanted the FDA to "do its course."
When asked about the extract in August, Trump said he had "heard about" oleandrin and said, "We'll look at it, we'll look at it, we're looking at a lot of different things." It's unclear if Trump raised the issue with the FDA. If Mike Lindel follows the rules he could get rat shit approved as a food supplement if proven safe.

10 Sep 20 - 10:38 PM (#4071493)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oleandrin as medication. Well, diarsenic trioxide is used in certain blood cancers, but I wouldn't just chow down on it because the President said it was a good idea.

10 Sep 20 - 11:48 PM (#4071497)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm invited to join a noon Zoom meeting tomorrow with other museum volunteers, and they're sending lunch, to be delivered sometime between 9 and 11:30am. The odd thing about this - they didn't tell us what they're planning to send or ask what we want to eat. I'm wondering if we'll get a last minute query tomorrow, or if I missed something on the invitation. They took us out for lunch back in January, and if someone kept track of what we ordered at that nice Italian restaurant and are planning to send that, okay. But I doubt anyone had a clue that September was going to be like this back in January.

11 Sep 20 - 08:39 AM (#4071524)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its the thought that counts except when it comes to lunch :^)
Sounds like a nice thing.
Government virtual meetings and Zoom meetings are not very nice
and would NEVER offer lunch.

11 Sep 20 - 11:49 AM (#4071541)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In ten minutes I'll be on a "Go To Meeting" meeting.

11 Sep 20 - 07:04 PM (#4071571)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I, being of sound mind and body do hereby post that I bequeath upon my death, 15 instruments to mudcat.org under the direction of Bill D and Maggie as executors. Stand up Bass, Triton piano, 5 string electic cello, 12 string guitar, Gibson Flat Iron Cadet mandolin, Martin Guitar, Mitchell steel ukelele, 3 more baritone ukes, Autoharp, banjo, tropical guitar, dark brown one piece back fiddle and glockenspiel.

To Rap a Roman Senator dagger. One of 9 that killed Ceasar.
BWL George Carlin books

11 Sep 20 - 10:03 PM (#4071580)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

There are an awful lot of strings attached to that Mudcat bequest.

12 Sep 20 - 06:35 AM (#4071609)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

As a child if my school had a sax there would have been no strings in my life and my life would have been entirely different.
All they had was a cello. Thats the power of a tiny quantum shift in life.

13 Sep 20 - 09:21 PM (#4071776)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My school had two rocks and a stick to beat on a log. All percussion, no melody.

14 Sep 20 - 10:20 AM (#4071832)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

My elementary school's approach to instrumental music was very simple: If you want to learn to play an instrument, talk your parents into buying it and paying for lessons. It's not our job. We only do classroom sing-alongs.

I don't recall having an instrument in my hand until I got my first guitar. Classrooms had pianos, but they were strictly for teachers. We weren't allowed to touch them.

That many classrooms nowadays have a ukulele and/or recorder for each student is a paradigm shift in the philosophy of music instruction.

14 Sep 20 - 12:24 PM (#4071848)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When I first took the cello home bullies of course took it apart for me. I'm still putting cellos together.

14 Sep 20 - 12:45 PM (#4071852)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are lots of player pianos but very few player cellos

14 Sep 20 - 03:33 PM (#4071865)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Why does the sun go on shining?
Why does the sea rush to shore?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
'Cause Trump rules the world evermore
Why do the birds go on singing?
Why do the stars glow above?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when the Dems lost the race
I wake up in the morning and I wonder
Why nothing is the same as it was
I can't understand, no, I can't understand
How cults go on the way that they do
Why does my heart go on beating?
Why do these eyes of mine cry?…

14 Sep 20 - 09:01 PM (#4071891)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Air tankers flying all afternoon and the smoke seems to be thickening. Tomorrow I see the doctor.

14 Sep 20 - 09:18 PM (#4071894)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I was fortunate my NYS school had 3 highly talented teachers, The choir sang in Notre Dame, The orchestra went to State competition and
and drama used both to do a different Rogers and Hammerstien every year. We did have to cut the fantasy ballet from Carousel since it was in 9 different keys. I played cello despite nerve reatachment and french horn despite the 9 iron accident. High School was still a battleground 8^o When a graduate came back from Nam and showed us his machine gun wounds, I doubled down to become college bound.

15 Sep 20 - 07:49 AM (#4071932)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When I was a kid people were tall
there were 5 billion people on Earth
Parents knew everything I didn't

When I was a kid it was fun to fall
To splash about or roll on the turf
Now they would call it an incident.

Now most folks are short
There's 7 billion souls
and parents are rarely right

Now it floods at the ports
some days I feel old
and friends just want to fight

15 Sep 20 - 11:15 AM (#4071962)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When I was a kid we measured rain in inches
Now rain is measured in feet
it flows down our toxic street
as a kid we rafted the creek

As a kid we trained to duck&cover
Now we can not even hide in bunker
Its to late for some who to try to breath air
Without Walter Cronkite the news isn't fair

Some things have changed
and some are the same
if ya can't love your neighbor
its really a shame.

15 Sep 20 - 06:32 PM (#4072002)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Medical appts today, flu shot tomorrow, dermatologist Thursday.

15 Sep 20 - 06:33 PM (#4072003)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And a VA doctor appt. Friday.

15 Sep 20 - 09:58 PM (#4072027)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

. . . and what's new, Rapparee,
about the grasshoppers?

13 Sept post. "a stick to beat on a log" ...
this is a music subject, but:

anybody remember that Filipino "Tinikling" thing
that was in three-quarter time, and
two lines of people pair up and sit on the floor,
and each pair takes a pair of bamboo sticks and
moves the sticks around on the floor, in the space between them:

tap, tap, slide-together
tap, tap, slide-together

and there is this little tune that goes with it that
somebody sings,
and everybody else
has to dance this little dance on either side of the
tapping bamboo sticks ...
without getting your foot caught when the sticks get to the
slide-together part ...

I suppose I had better use Joe Offer's well-promoted
search/filter features
and see if there is a "tinikling" thread.

In grade school when PhysEd would make us do this thing,
we had really competitive athletic kids in our class
who would flip into total high-anxiety freak-outs
over these bamboo-stick dances.
It helped if one was slightly musical, though.

15 Sep 20 - 10:25 PM (#4072035)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Busy week, Rap. I make a note in my calendar of anyplace I go on the day as my own early approach to "contact tracing" just in case it's needed. Next week I have a dentist appointment - and am probably going. I postponed it from three months ago. Hopefully it isn't into the COVID-abyss.

BWL, how's the weather forecast for your area?

16 Sep 20 - 10:09 AM (#4072081)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Bee-Dub, are you flooded? Can I mail you a life jacket?

16 Sep 20 - 10:57 AM (#4072090)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Until fairly recently, myxosporeans were considered to be protists, offshoots of the eukaryotic line that are neither plants, animals nor fungi. In 1995, however, Mark Siddall, then at the Virginia Institute of Marine Science, and his colleagues argued that myxosporeans are weird members of the cnidarians, the group that includes jellyfish and corals. Since then, genetic studies have bolstered that position.

Their location on the tree of life doesn’t explain how myxosporeans ended up with such strange traits. Myxosporeans boast some of the smallest known animal genomes. The genome of Kudoa iwatai, for example, is estimated to be a mere 22.5 megabases, considerably smaller than that of any other cnidarian genome. It’s less than one-twentieth the size of the genome of Polypodium hydriforme, a closely related cnidarian parasite.

Moreover, their genomes have not just been catastrophically reduced. They specifically lack certain genes thought to be essential for multicellular life. It’s not clear how or why a complex multicellular creature discarded these seemingly necessary genes along with huge chunks of its DNA.

Yet Alexander Panchin, a senior researcher at the Russian Academy of Sciences, and his colleagues have an intriguing if controversial hypothesis to explain it. Early this year, they proposed that myxosporeans initially branched off from their cnidarian kin not as independent animals but as tumors.

Evolutionary Scandals
Panchin knows the idea of cancer-derived animals sounds far-fetched — so much so that, in the paper, he and his co-authors refer to them as Scandals (an acronym for “speciated by cancer development animals”).

At first, Scandals were just a thought experiment. While Panchin was writing about transmissible cancers, he heard his colleagues express surprise at the genes for complex tissues that were turning up in certain unusual but simple parasitic animals. Further conversations led to what Panchin calls the “fantastic” idea that such simple parasites could have cancerous origins. “So we took all the data and we proposed this hypothesis,” he said.

According to Panchin’s three-step scenario, a Scandal would start off as a cancer, but not just any cancer. It would have to be transmissible, so that it wouldn’t die when its host did. Then the cancer would have to spread to other species, and then codependently evolve multicellularity. Panchin placed the Scandal tumors in sea water along with Hydro Sporodean jellfish and indeed a new species arose in the new jeuvenile immortal planulae.

In 2016 Panchin was declared missing and his lab was found in shambles. Mark Siddall said the biology world will mourn the loss of Dr. Panchin.

16 Sep 20 - 09:26 PM (#4072146)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oh, I love it when people talk dirty to Mom!

17 Sep 20 - 09:16 AM (#4072206)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here, Mom. More excitement for you!

For the classic LT, once the contagion spreads from the initial active nodes through the network, the system eventually reaches a stationary configuration if the threshold, the network structure, the diffusion parameters, and the focal nodes are fixed. In other words, the classic LT is path-independent if nodes can be repeatedly chosen, e.g., a node that is not activated at this time may be activated at one time in the future. In this model, a path-dependent process entails that the diffusion result may vary for different paths of diffusion, while a path-independent process is one for which the diffusion result is always consistent no matter the path of diffusion. Fig 2 gives an illustration of path independence in the classic LT: if the threshold T is assigned to be 0.5, then it does not matter whether we first activate node 4 or node 5; the final result is the same with active nodes 4 and 5, and inactive nodes 6, 7, 8. However, it should be noted that LT may be path-dependent if inactive nodes can be only chosen once or a limited number of times.

17 Sep 20 - 10:14 AM (#4072213)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In other words that was a statement of approximations without a plot or story line. The languages of Physics and Econonomics are even harder.
The record for speaking entirely in acronyms is 7 minutes 42 seconds.
People complain about legalese but William Barr AG has a way of simplifying it with comments such as "ALL PROTESTORS, DEMOCRATS AND candidates who challenge DONALD TRUMP SHALL BE CHARGED WITH SEDITION."

17 Sep 20 - 05:06 PM (#4072258)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm guilty of sedition fer sure, I'm fairly sedentary.

17 Sep 20 - 07:52 PM (#4072291)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I survived Hurricane Sally with no major issues. No damage to person, pets, structures or autos. Lots of limbs down (though I suspect some of them may be branches in disguise). Power was only out for ten hours or so and cell/Internet was down for a day. The bridge near the south end of the road I live on is underwater, so trips to the south entail a detour north and then back south via roads with no (or higher) bridges. That's okay. I'll just stay home. Got food, water, toilet paper, two unread books, and 18 guitars. What do I need to go to town for?

17 Sep 20 - 08:12 PM (#4072296)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

You lucky basterd. Good for you. Here is a gift of time you can use as you wish. https://www.quantamagazine.org/what-is-time-a-history-of-physics-biology-clocks-and-culture-20200504/

17 Sep 20 - 08:52 PM (#4072302)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Now that you have Internet you can download tons of books (and it won't amount to an ounce).

I recommend It Can't Happen Here. From 1935, this dystopian novel fits today's political situation remarkably well. Depressingly well. But it's Sinclair Lewis so it is also entertainingly well.

18 Sep 20 - 12:20 PM (#4072382)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

An easter egg grants access to Mudcat 2 (the search for more BS).
Special features include an idiot free digital world, access to posting in the afterlife, free IP, tuition free PHD programs and limited omniscience .
The Easter egg can be found somewhere in the original (not Annex) MOAB

18 Sep 20 - 08:52 PM (#4072434)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Why search for limited omniscience when I AM totally omniscient already?

18 Sep 20 - 11:56 PM (#4072441)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

There's no such thing as limited omniscience. It's an oxymoron.

19 Sep 20 - 10:54 AM (#4072477)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

No, I am still great friends with the Oxymoron family and there's nobody named An. There's Bill, Theresa, Sheri, Helen, the twins Billy and Willy, and the dog Fido.

19 Sep 20 - 11:39 AM (#4072481)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I've had more exposure to prescient lately, rather than omniscient. Mr. P would be Sinclair Lewis, whose 1935 novel It Can't Happen Here is a playbook for the GOP this year.

21 Sep 20 - 01:04 AM (#4072631)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Here comes Beta, a storm in a year where they used up the whole list of alphabetical names so now they're restarting with the Greek alphabet.

21 Sep 20 - 04:47 PM (#4072691)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One day Nazis, Trump and McConnel will just disappear like a miracle but virus won't die of old age.

The good ol days of the new normal aren't what they used to be.

Denying the dieing wish of an old bat is what makes it more delicious.
Trump tweet.

The AGE OF MISINFORMATION is over.
Q Anon.

Republicans agree to a 10 trillon dollar stimulus package to Wall St.

Trump's omnicience is limited only by the greatness in his own mind.
(he's a bleached hydro oxymoron)

But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of Covid. Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of Covid as a little child, shall in no wise survive unscathed."

21 Sep 20 - 08:11 PM (#4072713)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

“How many valiant men, how many fair ladies, breakfast with their kinfolk and the same night supped with their ancestors in the next world! The condition of the people was pitiable to behold. They sickened by the thousands daily, and died unattended and without help. Many died in the open street, others dying in their houses, made it known by the stench of their rotting bodies. Consecrated churchyards did not suffice for the burial of the vast multitude of bodies, which were heaped by the hundreds in vast trenches, like goods in a ships hold and covered with a little earth.”
-Giovanni Boccaccio

22 Sep 20 - 06:55 AM (#4072744)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Answer: About a 1,000 a day in the US. The stench of rotting flesh is hidden today by the use of civilized refridgerated semi trucks.

What is differnt today are the crowds of cheerleaders for the virus.

22 Sep 20 - 01:27 PM (#4072774)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mr. Open: Hey Donuel you must be ecstatic about Trump's stroke and that he hasn't recovered his speech.

Donuel: Ecstatic? That means out of one's mind. No I'm not ecstatic.
I'm sad, it's a lonely end for a lonely man. In that way he truly was a common man.

Mr. Open: You hypocrite, you hated him. You never had anything good to

Donuel: I understood the mistakes he made to please his father. He was inspired by the wrong God.

Mr Open: I thought you said you were an athiest - and how could Trump be lonely, he had crowds breathing poison just to see him.

Donuel: Yes, that was some sick inspiration but thats how vulnerable and desperate people are when it comes to the power of sharing hate.
He had a hole in him he could never fill and didn't respect the knowledge that could have saved him. No I didn't respect him but I can feel sorry for him and his innocent followers.

Mr. Open: Greedy suck up innocents my ass. They were in it for the money!

Donuel: Not all of them. Look, the man is in hell now. I suggest he have a long stay.

My Open: Well amen to that.

23 Sep 20 - 12:18 PM (#4072890)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Rapparee, are you free of the grasshoppers at last?

23 Sep 20 - 12:50 PM (#4072893)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A worm's eye view of the universe is grounding.
But only tasting and feeling sound is its world.
The mighty grasshopper can see his horizon and fly.
Each of the many worlds have their special pleasures.
The pleasure of arriving at Sirius B is reserved for X
but not man

25 Sep 20 - 09:52 PM (#4073134)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM!!! MOM!!!
You get up there!!!!! Right NOW!!!!

26 Sep 20 - 01:27 PM (#4073205)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

She was out in the back yard working, taking a day off from news. A moratorium on news helps keep her attitude better when she visits down at the Legion Hovel. Then the stuff the others are complaining about is new to her and has been thoroughly digested and presented with the answers as well as the questions the news brings up. Saves time.

26 Sep 20 - 03:41 PM (#4073225)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

She's getting quite a reputation at the Hovel. Nobody thought someone as frail-looking as Mom, could do the splits like that, and on top of a piano as well!

27 Sep 20 - 09:46 PM (#4073405)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Channel Firing
By Thomas Hardy

That night your great guns, unawares,
Shook all our coffins as we lay,
And broke the chancel window-squares,
We thought it was the Judgment-day

And sat upright. While drearisome
Arose the howl of wakened hounds:
The mouse let fall the altar-crumb,
The worms drew back into the mounds,

The glebe cow drooled. Till God called, “No;
It’s gunnery practice out at sea
Just as before you went below;
The world is as it used to be:

“All nations striving strong to make
Red war yet redder. Mad as hatters
They do no more for Christés sake
Than you who are helpless in such matters.

“That this is not the judgment-hour
For some of them’s a blessed thing,
For if it were they’d have to scour
Hell’s floor for so much threatening....

“Ha, ha. It will be warmer when
I blow the trumpet (if indeed
I ever do; for you are men,
And rest eternal sorely need).”

So down we lay again. “I wonder,
Will the world ever saner be,”
Said one, “than when He sent us under
In our indifferent century!”

And many a skeleton shook his head.
“Instead of preaching forty year,”
My neighbour Parson Thirdly said,
“I wish I had stuck to pipes and beer.”

Again the guns disturbed the hour,
Roaring their readiness to avenge,
As far inland as Stourton Tower,
And Camelot, and starlit Stonehenge.

28 Sep 20 - 12:10 PM (#4073476)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Dulce et Decorum Est
By Wilfred Owen

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs,
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.

Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!—An ecstasy of fumbling
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime.—
Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,—
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

28 Sep 20 - 12:48 PM (#4073484)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Dover Beach
By Matthew Arnold

The sea is calm tonight.
The tide is full, the moon lies fair
Upon the straits; on the French coast the light
Gleams and is gone; the cliffs of England stand,
Glimmering and vast, out in the tranquil bay.
Come to the window, sweet is the night-air!
Only, from the long line of spray
Where the sea meets the moon-blanched land,
Listen! you hear the grating roar
Of pebbles which the waves draw back, and fling,
At their return, up the high strand,
Begin, and cease, and then again begin,
With tremulous cadence slow, and bring
The eternal note of sadness in.

Sophocles long ago
Heard it on the Ægean, and it brought
Into his mind the turbid ebb and flow
Of human misery; we
Find also in the sound a thought,
Hearing it by this distant northern sea.

The Sea of Faith
Was once, too, at the full, and round earth’s shore
Lay like the folds of a bright girdle furled.
But now I only hear
Its melancholy, long, withdrawing roar,
Retreating, to the breath
Of the night-wind, down the vast edges drear
And naked shingles of the world.

Ah, love, let us be true
To one another! for the world, which seems
To lie before us like a land of dreams,
So various, so beautiful, so new,
Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light,
Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;
And we are here as on a darkling plain
Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,
Where ignorant armies clash by night.

28 Sep 20 - 01:30 PM (#4073489)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Clean War
by Patricia Wellingham-Jones

Tell that to the ravens
plucking out eyes
on the blood-packed sand

To fathers cradling
the last of their hopes
in torn bodies

To young girls swelling
with the unwanted gifts
of swift strong soldiers

To mothers and wives
pulling on veils of grief
as they wash their dead

Inform the children
who wander dazed with thirst, alone
among ruins

28 Sep 20 - 10:47 PM (#4073553)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Young British Soldier
by Rudyard Kipling

WHEN the 'arf-made recruity goes out to the East
'E acts like a babe an' 'e drinks like a beast,
An' 'e wonders because 'e is frequent deceased
Ere 'e's fit for to serve as a soldier.
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
Serve, serve, serve as a soldier,
So-oldier of the Queen!

Now all you recruities what's drafted to-day,
You shut up your rag-box an' 'ark to my lay,
An' I'll sing you a soldier as far as I may:
A soldier what's fit for a soldier.
Fit, fit, fit for a soldier . . .

First mind you steer clear o' the grog-sellers' huts,
For they sell you Fixed Bay'nets that rots out your guts -
Ay, drink that 'ud eat the live steel from your butts -
An' it's bad for the young British soldier.
Bad, bad, bad for the soldier . . .

When the cholera comes - as it will past a doubt -
Keep out of the wet and don't go on the shout,
For the sickness gets in as the liquor dies out,
An' it crumples the young British soldier.
Crum-, crum-, crumples the soldier . . .

But the worst o' your foes is the sun over'ead:
You must wear your 'elmet for all that is said:
If 'e finds you uncovered 'e'll knock you down dead,
An' you'll die like a fool of a soldier.
Fool, fool, fool of a soldier . . .

If you're cast for fatigue by a sergeant unkind,
Don't grouse like a woman nor crack on nor blind;
Be handy and civil, and then you will find
That it's beer for the young British soldier.
Beer, beer, beer for the soldier . . .

Now, if you must marry, take care she is old -
A troop-sergeant's widow's the nicest I'm told,
For beauty won't help if your rations is cold,
Nor love ain't enough for a soldier.
'Nough, 'nough, 'nough for a soldier . . .

If the wife should go wrong with a comrade, be loath
To shoot when you catch 'em - you'll swing, on my oath! -
Make 'im take 'er and keep 'er: that's Hell for them both,
An' you're shut o' the curse of a soldier.
Curse, curse, curse of a soldier . . .

When first under fire an' you're wishful to duck,
Don't look nor take 'eed at the man that is struck,
Be thankful you're livin', and trust to your luck
And march to your front like a soldier.
Front, front, front like a soldier . . .

When 'arf of your bullets fly wide in the ditch,
Don't call your Martini a cross-eyed old bitch;
She's human as you are - you treat her as sich,
An' she'll fight for the young British soldier.
Fight, fight, fight for the soldier . . .

When shakin' their bustles like ladies so fine,
The guns o' the enemy wheel into line,
Shoot low at the limbers an' don't mind the shine,
For noise never startles the soldier.
Start-, start-, startles the soldier . . .

If your officer's dead and the sergeants look white,
Remember it's ruin to run from a fight:
So take open order, lie down, and sit tight,
And wait for supports like a soldier.
Wait, wait, wait like a soldier . . .

When you're wounded and left on Afghanistan's plains,
And the women come out to cut up what remains,
Jest roll to your rifle and blow out your brains
An' go to your Gawd like a soldier.
Go, go, go like a soldier,
Go, go, go like a soldier,
Go, go, go like a soldier,
So-oldier of the Queen!

29 Sep 20 - 06:42 PM (#4073644)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

The Thomas Hardy poem, "Channel Firing," was nicely set to music
by Gerard Finzi (English composer despite the name).
Right, Mom,
now upstairs before
Rapparee hollers at you again.

30 Sep 20 - 05:51 PM (#4073785)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

We've had some fall-like weather this week, but it's warm again today. MOM can't decide if she needs to keep making iced tea or get out the hot pumpkin spice drinks for any visitor who spends time on the screened in porch.

30 Sep 20 - 09:54 PM (#4073814)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We ate dinner on the back porch/deck this evening. It was 71F and quite pleasant. Supposed to be that was the rest of the week and into next.

01 Oct 20 - 03:55 PM (#4073910)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Mom!

I have a poly leaf rake. It says so right on the sticker. I need to know if it will work for raking natural leaves, or only poly ones?

01 Oct 20 - 09:59 PM (#4073952)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Did Poly leaf you to clean up the leaves?

03 Oct 20 - 06:33 PM (#4074209)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Well, MOM, if you don't want Rapparee hollering at you,
better hustle up to the top of the queue.

03 Oct 20 - 11:50 PM (#4074239)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I most certainly do not shout, yell at, holler, or otherwise orally abuse Mom! Why, someone might get the wrong idea and believe that she doesn't like me, her Favorite (Favourite in Canada) best.

04 Oct 20 - 02:40 PM (#4074309)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Still on sub-lurk, here.

04 Oct 20 - 06:38 PM (#4074332)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Nephew Ted is back from Georgia (the Tblisi one) and will probably start training as a Game Warden in Wisconsin the end of this month. Whether he stays in the Marine Reserves is an open question. Soon I'll be able to hunt all over WI with impunity!

04 Oct 20 - 10:04 PM (#4074347)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Been working on my presentation on past pandemics in US. I'm not going to create the links (do some work yourself!) but the virus causing measles looks to me like Cookie Monster from Sesame Street and the one for polio like the planet in Saint-Exupery's The Little Prince.

04 Oct 20 - 11:38 PM (#4074352)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM saw a rock painted for Halloween out in someone's front yard. Now she's back in the paint shelves looking to see what she can use. I guess if a rock will work in one yard, white washing the big trees and painting scary faces on them will be even more impressive.

05 Oct 20 - 11:44 AM (#4074404)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I shall make no suggestions that Mom or anyone begin doing things like
this.

06 Oct 20 - 07:07 PM (#4074542)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

At the risk of playing Pete and re-Pete, there's another hurricane headed for the Gulf. What do you want to bet that it has BWL's address in it's contact list for once it comes ashore?

06 Oct 20 - 07:37 PM (#4074546)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

bathyscaphe sub lurk.

07 Oct 20 - 09:26 PM (#4074699)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Of course it does. And it's sent collect on and after delivery.

08 Oct 20 - 07:30 PM (#4074799)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Went to the doctor today. He reduced one medication, a statin, by half and increased another from two to three pills a day. I guess it even out. No surgery or anything in the foreseeable future, but it's pretty dark out there.

08 Oct 20 - 08:28 PM (#4074803)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Is it the future thats dark or early nights?

It looks like bringing light to the dark of the moon will be unlikely since Trump will probably be the biggest loser this election cycle. - To explain we have to go all the way back to Reagan's Star Wars defense program where a small underground nuke would be exploded and its energy converted to a high power X ray laser weapon. This idea was recently reworked by Dr. Godfrey McMillain to use an enormous visible light laser instead, and was presented to Trump as a way to project the word Trump on the dark phase of the moon for the entire world to see. Branding the moon with light has Donald more excited than a thousand mile wall.
If Trump wins, survivors will be able to see 'Trump' in the sky on clear nights for at least 4 years.

08 Oct 20 - 10:21 PM (#4074808)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

See Robert A. Heinlein, "The Man Who Sold The Moon," (1950).

09 Oct 20 - 04:54 PM (#4074887)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

have a heart, Hancock.

10 Oct 20 - 04:31 PM (#4075048)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

MOAB is reduced to the Fantastic 4.

I fear a promotion of free beer to post here
might not work. Especially if it is Bud light.

11 Oct 20 - 09:00 AM (#4075120)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Lite beer? I'd rather be fat than sober.

11 Oct 20 - 06:25 PM (#4075168)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'd drink horse piss before I'd drink Budwe...wait, that's the same thing.

12 Oct 20 - 08:58 AM (#4075230)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Idaho Legion Hovel has all-you-can-drink free beer tomorrow.

12 Oct 20 - 05:41 PM (#4075306)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My lap top today fell into 3 pieces rendering it dead.
With some ol reliable duct tape, epoxy and super glue I brought it back to life. Score one against the engineers of planned obsolesence.

12 Oct 20 - 07:20 PM (#4075316)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

And no one will steal a laptop that looks like that so you've assured a higher level of security.

Free beer tomorrow? How about every day through election day. The news is so fraught that an evening glass of whisky is the self-Rx to treat the otherwise palpable anxiety generated by news out of the nation's capital.

Two of the dogs and I are drying out now after I took the hose with the nozzle out to give the two big dogs a rinse-off. I fear there was shampoo left in their coats a couple of weeks ago during their baths, that's the only way I can explain all of the itching and chewing in dogs who don't have fleas. I've switched them to one of their old foods also, for a break from the one they've gotten this summer. Itching dogs is bad enough for them and it's driving me nuts!

13 Oct 20 - 07:41 AM (#4075361)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Did I mention that a toilet stopped working yesterday? Fortunately, the plumber could visit. Unfortunately it's one of those types with an air-assisted flush, so I couldn't fix it. Fortunately the part was on the truck.

Now comes the part about paying.

13 Oct 20 - 08:10 AM (#4075365)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

For me booze=snooze. Black gorilla tape covers all glue areas on my lap top so it looks good enough to steal but it never leaves home since I don't have an active academic life like yours. Maybe you could be a curator one day as museums are in a fluid state nowadays.

Rap, my glass coated toilets are virtually self cleaning. Thanks for the Lennox tip, the difference is great.

13 Oct 20 - 11:55 AM (#4075400)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I have remembered that the Labrador retriever used to get a daily dose of Zyrtec for his itching (3 pills for a 75 pound dog, the vet calculated, though I only take 1 and I weigh more. Go figure). So last night I finally got smart and started the two itchy dogs on Zyrtec (the 45 pound dog will get 2 pills, because.) Let's hope this works. It can be purchased in bulk at Costco (Sam's Club is less expensive, but I've stopped going there. Because.)

Gorilla glue, eh? I don't think I've tried that, though I've seen enough ads for it. And there's some kind of miraculous tape for fastening things to walls. The ads flow past like the water in a stream, turning up again every so often, possibly to be acted upon at a later date.

So it's Prime Day now and I ordered another Echo speaker because it comes with a "free" smart light bulb. And because of the cost it's like I'm getting one of these things free. They suck you in that way. And I have a discount to spend but it didn't kick in yet so I must see what that's all about. If one type of advertising doesn't get you, another will.

Good luck with the toilet. I may begrudge the high fees charged by the plumber, but considering the places and times they do their job, it's mostly worth it.

13 Oct 20 - 02:43 PM (#4075414)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Gorrilla TAPE is long lasting indoors. Its triple thick duct tape.
Gorilla Glue (original) EXPANDS and will fill in a cracked fencepost or loose stone masonry or hand rail. Not good for any instrument repair - it pushes the wood apart but is good to mount a table top on a pedestal. After 7 years it turns a dark brown red outdoors. Indoors it stays a light tan color. Get it on yours hands and its there for a week despite soap and water.

I'm cutting the TV cable and going to streaming. Youtube looks like the best deal. Verizon is just too big for its britches and getting slow, stupid and crammed to the gills. I will still use their IT.

13 Oct 20 - 06:09 PM (#4075432)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I signed up for Sling TV (Blue package) a few months ago and am quite happy with it. $30 a month for several channels that I regularly watch, and if you want more they have on-demand streaming (I haven't done that so I don't know how much those items cost.) I have high speed internet and it streams into things like Roku, Fire Stick, Chrome stick, and some of the newer smart TVs with downloadable or installed apps.

The holiday shopping started here several weeks ago but got a big boost from Amazon Prime day. And it's just as well I did it early because the guys at the Legion hovel were doing all of their shopping on their phones and tablets and laptops and tying up the WiFi this afternoon.

No matter how many cushy beds I put out for the dogs, this darned puppy always wants to sleep on the rug on top of my rubber mat at my standing desk (that is rarely cranked to the standing position these days). Why is that? Is that mat really that comfortable, is it because she's into leaning on my lumpy feet, or just because I say no so she wants to do it? Inquiring minds and all that.

13 Oct 20 - 10:03 PM (#4075459)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My presentation on Pandemics Past In The US is coming apace. I hope to have it done by midnight on the 19th, as I'm giving it on the 20th at 11 a.m. MDT.

14 Oct 20 - 10:55 AM (#4075501)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

A virtual presentation, Rap? Will you be Zooming around the planet?

14 Oct 20 - 11:00 AM (#4075502)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Some folks may be physically present (safeguards in place!). Others will be there via some sort of magical connection called "Zoom" (refers to hypersonic brooms, I think). Assuming that they get the magic to work -- it's been iffy lately due to the overweaning conceit of some PhDs who can't admit they don't know something. I have confidence that this will be taken care of by Tuesday next...abandoned mineshafts abound.

14 Oct 20 - 01:05 PM (#4075510)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

An excellent use of your talents Rap.
I'm surprised how pandemics have little or no logic as a parasite or in our response to it. Our life and its life seem random.

Now for some top notch PHD BS...

I don't give logic much credit. Logic arises out of the situation where there is often zero freedom to question the original assumption. Not only is it the case that logic arises out of this lack of freedom (as some kind of necessary pre-condition), logic is the lack of freedom which it arose from. What has the most freedom in all reality is space and not what we call a thing. For example; Hollowed out, clay makes a pot. Where the pot’s not, is where it’s useful. Cut doors and windows to make a room, where the room isn’t, there’s room for you. What is, is in the use of what isn’t. This sounds illogical but true doesn't it? In cosmology space breaks all our rules. Space can move faster than light. It is enormously small. Different spaces can exist within a space. If I continue, your mind may explode so allow me to simply say things are not as the seem to our POV, yet space allows room for things to change.

14 Oct 20 - 09:34 PM (#4075531)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My mind exploded at 7:10 a.m., February 11, 1945, when I was thrust from a nice, warm, quiet womb into the cold, harsh, delivery room. It's never been reconstructed.

15 Oct 20 - 09:54 PM (#4075634)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I've been busy, Mom.

17 Oct 20 - 09:13 AM (#4075754)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Man:
I knew about misinformation and the difference with disinformation.
But when I started seeing fake websites that looked real I didn't know what was happening so I kept it in.
Wife: He started believing things that weren't true. I knew something was wrong but I didn't say a word.
Moderator: During the course of Trumpism around 50% of people with Trumpism may experience hallucinations or delusions but now Doctors are prescribing new Bidenox, the only FDA approved medicine that significantly reduces hallucinations delusions and conspiracies related to Trumpism. Do not take Bidenox if you are allergic to its ingredients. It can reduce death in older patients who are addicted to Trump rallies. Bidenox can reduce exposure to the side effcts of Covid 19. Tell you doctor about any changes in Facebook and Twitter exposure. Side effects may include rational thought and identifying bald faced lies and conspiracies. Ask your Senator about new Bidenox.

17 Oct 20 - 12:34 PM (#4075765)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Re: your remarks about space, a friend one time told me that one of his favorite things to photograph is doorways, and doorways with windows. I started making a point of trying his theory about the pleasure of photographing these portals and find he was correct. I have some very nice photos of doorways on historic houses that have experience a lot of "space travel" through them.

17 Oct 20 - 02:02 PM (#4075773)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, when you're preparing a program on pandemics pretty soon EVERYTHING begins to look like a virus: nebulae, bushes, even hair on heads. Perhaps everything IS a virus, even the Earth and the Solar System, and the entire Universe. Just looking for something to stick our bacteriophage into and inject our DNA/RNA.

18 Oct 20 - 06:50 AM (#4075828)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Mass keeps colliding from gravity

18 Oct 20 - 09:04 AM (#4075832)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

oops
My old idea has been..,
As Mass and dark matter keep colliding and collapsing from gravity ultimately into black holes,

Space keeps expanding and accelerating (dark energy) from singularities where time and mass change places with space and time.
-
Penrose diagrams show how this can happen. So
as mass makes more black holes, black holes makes more space from those singularities.
-
7 billion years ago there were fewer black holes and the expansion of space was much slower. Now there more BH's and faster space creation formation. The young universe looked like a dense sponge or internal bone structure. An old universe will look like osteoporosis.

-
How long can this perpetual motion, like a snake eating its tail, continue? Until an entropic state change happens when space stretches no further and mass has collapsed all it can.
A big rip happens ending with a universe with a lower energy state.
So for now galaxies keep merging and space keeps accelerating.

Therefore we are living inside the bones of the cosmic dog.

18 Oct 20 - 10:48 PM (#4075907)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Black holes look like viruses. Perhaps they are the bacteriophage of extra-dimensional virus galaxies, but instead of injecting GNA (Galactic ribonucleic acid) it's sucking ours out.

18 Oct 20 - 11:40 PM (#4075911)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

SARS-Cov-2 looks like a diagram for something galactic. An invading alien, to be sure.

19 Oct 20 - 09:04 AM (#4075952)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Viewer alert! Planet Porn

19 Oct 20 - 10:46 AM (#4075967)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The best kind, and such nice organ work.

19 Oct 20 - 10:49 AM (#4075968)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Not healthy. Nope, not at all.

19 Oct 20 - 05:11 PM (#4076031)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I once wrote that if we lived 700 years, wars would be 800 years apart. If all veterans are dead and there are no living witnesses to the carnage, a society could be more easily conned into war.
This might be key to some right wing think tanks that happily advise Trump to advance infection among the oldest generation.
This hypothesis is as crazy as what is already going on but the more likely causitive factor in our deliberate runaway infection rates is simply the self interest of our sociopath President.

The President has earnestly tried to make Dr. Fauci (the most published epidemiologist in the world) a target of assasination and has suceeded with Dr. Fauci receiving numerous threats.
You won't see Trump stand close to Fauci ever again.

19 Oct 20 - 10:03 PM (#4076084)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I'm done and I'm going to bed. Walter Reed died in 1902 or a burst appendix after finishing his work in Cuba on Yellow Fever (proving the hypothesis of Dr. Carlos Finley of Cuba that YF is spread by mosquitoes) in 1901. This also proved the worth of the cleanup of New Orleans by Benjamin Butler during the Civil War, but nobody paid any attention at the time.

I've learned that if a disease isn't carried by an insect it spreads by inhaling and exhaling or because people foul the water with their shit and other people ingest it.

So, to avoid disease, don't eat, drink, or breathe.

20 Oct 20 - 07:50 AM (#4076112)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

On the other hand eat drink and be joyous.
I live near 2 different Walter Reed facilitie. West Nile infected mosquitos escaped from one 20 years ago. I guess west nile didn't like the climate here and didn't persist. As far as I know.

20 Oct 20 - 10:52 AM (#4076145)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I just had a 'Go Fund Me' idea regarding an unofficial Trump memorial statue of a heavenly golden golf bag containing broken golf clubs with a bronze plaque saying:
"In loving memory to Donald J Trump from immigrant parents, gay lesbian, bi transgender, advocates of diversity, Covid victims and patriots of democracy - for his timely passing."
The golf bag and each club is labeled TRUMP.

I would like to see it on Obama Plaza at the Trump tower or as a replacement for the defiant young lady that will sadly soon be removed from the Wall street statue site of the Raging Bull.

20 Oct 20 - 03:58 PM (#4076192)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Northern Tool took so long to send my electric string trimmer that I called a couple of times to ask where it was. I guess they must have ordered it again; I had a FedEx message that they wanted a street address for a delivery (after I'd already picked up the one that arrived at the store) so I gave the store the tracking number and told them they might want to check it out. Either this was the same one I'd picked up (after FedEx took it to the store) or it was a duplicate.

Today they sent an email acknowledging the return. I think they credited me back the purchase price. Duh. If they're going to be that slow and disorganized I guess they're going to give away the merchandise occasionally.

20 Oct 20 - 08:51 PM (#4076230)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You could have asked. We have an electric Stihl trimmer we don't use.

Mom, the months of preparation ended around 12:20 pm MDT. I was complemented several times on the preperartion, presentation, and overall content on the Pandemics Past lecture this this morning. I was even complimented on my memory! The Zoom part worked pretty well too, once they got it ready to go.

21 Oct 20 - 07:14 AM (#4076264)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Historic pandemics is an interesting subject to be sure. I am also intrigued by prehistoric pandemics. Cretaceous pandemics may have been huge, not to be confused eith mass extinction events.

For those who have been to the Tidal Basin in DC with the Jefferson Memorial and cherry trees may be interested to know of its slow demise due to to the mysterious rising waters. Sixteen more cherry trees have drowned this year. There are plans to solve this water problem and solutions actually include moving the MLK monument which Trumo shows the most enthusiasm.

21 Oct 20 - 12:45 PM (#4076306)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Mysterious rising waters in the Tidal Basin:
pardon my ignorance,
is this strictly the harbor/shore,
or does this include the Potomac?
And why mysterious?

21 Oct 20 - 02:25 PM (#4076321)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its world wide.
In America some government agencies are silenced from using certain WORDS. NOOA is forbidden from saying global warming. Florida has state bans on words.
Now the word FETUS has fallen out of favor.

21 Oct 20 - 08:28 PM (#4076377)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

edit NOAA

This is not your typical tweedle dee or tweedledumb choice this election. It is more like his excellency Dungmold J Trounce vs. citizen Joey. Ignorant bullies will unite behind their like minded Fuerer. Yes this includes police who were drawn to the bully force in the first place. I have heard a Police Captain in an unguarded moment and he sounded like a mini Turdp and confused insult with power. We have seen a rethinking of our civil war and its monuments. Trump will not be forgotten but will become a martyr for terrorists as long as the 1865 civil war rememberance and will remind the haters how close they got to a 4th Reich. Its not over for a long time and the past has not passed.

Stream of consciousness; I do more than parrot facts. I can do parody, editorializing, opinion, historical resemblance (but not as good as Rap) , epic cartoons and fail at jokes where BWL excels. This confuses folks keb. It burns Joe O's toast but thats the way the kook e-crumbles. If it is a straight up humorous take I sometimes label it with :^/ In these grim times I often give a smirk version of facts but that is not in any way misinformaion. Other things are too subtle to label.
Unless new rules will require all posts must be footnoted, communication will be truncated. Then there are people like Maggie who naturally get it. Like discussing science it has to be predicated on a whole list of pre existing knowledge and shared truths.

21 Oct 20 - 11:22 PM (#4076391)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Rap, if you need to unload that trimmer you can send it to me, I'll pay your postage. I go through them pretty quickly with this large yard.

MOM sat sipping her single malt this evening and watching MSNBC - and snorted out loud several times. The Worm is turning.

22 Oct 20 - 04:48 PM (#4076475)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Well ya gotta learn how to load new string. :^/

22 Oct 20 - 06:17 PM (#4076484)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I kept my allergies under tight control last spring, just as COVID was taking hold, but the ragweed is kicking my butt this fall, when it isn't a good time to have a headache, watery eyes, sneezes and the urge to cough. MOM suggested taking a flamethrower to the creek banks out behind the house. We have rain in the forecast for tomorrow, so maybe timing it so any escaped embers will be put out by rain . . .

22 Oct 20 - 08:32 PM (#4076495)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I can no longer live in Boston due to a seasonal red oak allergy that seals my eyes shut. Fall is good for a visit.
Kurt Russel's 'the Thing' has my favorite flamethrower action. Rap do they use laundry detergent and gasoline for fuel?

22 Oct 20 - 08:53 PM (#4076496)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Pressurized napalm. Napalm is jellied gasoline and when used in a flamethrower does NOT flame on exposure to the air -- there is an igniter for the steam. Napalm can be made at home from gasoline (unleaded is more environmentally friendly) by combining it with a plasticizer such as styrofoam or polystyrene beads, Joy soap (in the past, they changed for formula).

23 Oct 20 - 09:44 AM (#4076535)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I intentionally didn't mention napalm, but make a suggestion about fire around here and everyone jumps to that conclusion. I should have said drip torch, not flame thrower. None of you ever used a drip torch with a gasoline and diesel fuel mix? The diesel keeps the gasoline from being explosive.

23 Oct 20 - 12:48 PM (#4076548)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Um, yes, I have. Please don't ask why or where.

23 Oct 20 - 01:50 PM (#4076552)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I too intentionally did not mention napalm. I was just being a second bannana.

Have you ever seen vintage candy for sale from the lost candy warehouse, whereabouts unknown? https://www.candywarehouse.com/themes/old-fashioned-candy-retro-sweets
I was thinking about how ice cores can determine the atmosphere in the past as well as tree rings and climate.
Back in the day there was honey or cane sugar in sweets.
These can be tested with a mass spectrometer at NIH and show how much fission by products and radioactive decay has taken place in the organic sugars and honey. It turns out that even years after the atmospheric test ban there were still traces of atomic misdeeds.
There were a few candies that were not dated. There were other pre atomic age candies and drinks that you would not believe what was revealed. Moxie was amazing.

Vintage candies Inc. is just about sold out so let me know if you need some really old candy.

23 Oct 20 - 02:01 PM (#4076553)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

70 year old Royal Crown Sour Cherry is still good. (Malic acid did not decay). I do wonder what some parents might think if they find an ancient and extinct candy in their child's pillowcase. A ghost?

23 Oct 20 - 02:33 PM (#4076557)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A movie company has pretty much bought out the candy warehouse but you can still relive those tooth rotting moments when you were a kid if you buy hard candy. The chocolate has oxidized into a white stone substance. The Willy Wonka Candy Company was discontinued in September 2015 and their candy products were put under the Nestle name in Switzerland. The warehouse location is still undiscovered. Its harder to find than the warehouses for billionaires in China.
Those warehouses and trusts are called 'family offices'. 64 TRILLION DOLLARS WORTH !!!
Maybe they will be the next target for Ocean's 11.

23 Oct 20 - 07:44 PM (#4076593)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Imaging the billionaire warehouses aka 'family offices' from the air or space, they look fairly typical although enormous and are marketed as impenetreble.

23 Oct 20 - 08:01 PM (#4076596)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

https://www.vermontcountrystore.com/candy/category/classic-candy

23 Oct 20 - 08:10 PM (#4076598)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Chuckles has been extinct for decades. Their factory was in Danville Ill.

24 Oct 20 - 08:15 AM (#4076657)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Where were we, oh yeah, flamethrowers. One can build a modest flamethrower that goes 15 feet with parts from Home Depot. For the kids this holiday, lighting the spray from Lysol cans is great fun and is in keeping with the pandemic theme.

25 Oct 20 - 01:57 PM (#4076777)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Lighting one or more firecrackers taped to a butane lighter has its exponents.

25 Oct 20 - 04:12 PM (#4076800)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Poking my head in and using MOAB to help push down the thread full of treacle that WAV has pushed to the top again with more of the Pablum he refers to as "Poetry." Gotta do this for Amos - I won't dignify his thread by going in and remarking there, since he did start it.

25 Oct 20 - 06:30 PM (#4076837)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Now I know
And I wish
I had not looked.

25 Oct 20 - 07:56 PM (#4076845)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That crap, once seen, is hard to unsee.

25 Oct 20 - 10:13 PM (#4076853)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Just in case anyone is overly concerned this week, remember that Trump talks an aggressive game but there are not people willing to obey illegal orders be it impounding ballots, sending troops to polling places or any other of his violent sedition orders. Those bases are covered behind the scenes. I am not willing to guarantee the behavior of the supream court. I hope they learned from their W choice in 2000.

25 Oct 20 - 10:16 PM (#4076854)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I didn't have a chance to finish my polemic thread.

26 Oct 20 - 08:11 AM (#4076889)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I had the delusion that wav would get better or try to improve.
He gets an A for organization and an f for form, kinda like the nazi penchant for record keeping of very bad things. I wish I had his record keeping ability even if it was a short list.

26 Oct 20 - 08:23 AM (#4076890)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Vogon poetry is described as "the third worst poetry in the Universe" behind that of the Azgoths of Kria; four members of an audience died of internal haemorrhaging during a recitation by their poet master Fartabout the Flatulent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Pus I Found in My Armpit One Autumn Morning"
Didja ever notice the greatest surge in amateur poetry occured after 9-11 like a scab over a wound?

26 Oct 20 - 09:06 AM (#4076892)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Southern Scourge

The yellow fever was raging,
Down in the sunny south;
And in many of the cities,
There was a death at every house.
This plague a war was raging,
With the lives of people there;
The young and old were stricken down,
And lay in sad despair.

No comfort, all was misery
In many a southern home.
Where once was peace and quietness,
Now in distress are thrown;
For death the house has visited,
And caused the inmates to mourn
The loss of some dear loving friend,
That on earth no more shall roam.

Some people in delirium,
Have wandered from their home;
Have wandered to a vacant house,
And there have died alone,
With no kind friend to care for them,
Or close their dying eyes.
Oh God! in horrid misery
Hundreds of people died.

There were many whole families
Taken down sick in a day;
With no one to care for them,
In death they passed away.
Their spirits arose to God above,
Where sickness is no more;
Where peace and comfort ever reign,
On Heaven's blissful shore.

There is many a southern city
To-day is filled with woe,
And many of the inhabitants
Have wandered to and fro
To nurse the sick and dying --
The dead for the grave prepare.
They tried to do their duty,
With hearts filled with despair.

The Howard Association
Have been doing all they can,
To keep the "plague" from raging
Throughout the southern land;
They nursed the sick, they fed the poor,
They work both night and day,
This brave band in the southern scourge
Heroic courage display.

This noble band of charity
Have went from house to house,
To ease the sad misery of
The sufferers at the south;
Sad scenes of death and suffering
Each day they must endure,
As in the daily rounds they went
Among the afflicted poor.

The noble northern people
Have helped them all they can,
In money, food and clothing
Which they had at their command;
There is many a southern person
That will bless this Howard band,
For their noble deeds of charity
To the sufferers of their land.
-- Julia Ann Moore

26 Oct 20 - 01:24 PM (#4076922)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I scribbled a limerick this morning to post to the "DON'T POST" thread in order to bring it back to the top. A limerick is still a higher class of lit than the codswallop it was pushing to the bottom of the page. :)

26 Oct 20 - 03:26 PM (#4076931)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We're turning the coroner
with Covid 19
Our evil sorcerer
pretends a vaccine

The dieing is rising
with each passing day
on goes campaigning
for which they will pay

They say in time
It will all go away
Just like the dead
in the ground - they will stay

26 Oct 20 - 03:33 PM (#4076933)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Rapparee's Julia Ann Moore --
is she not the Sweet Singer of Michigan,
celebrated in "Pegasus Descending"?

26 Oct 20 - 03:56 PM (#4076935)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Writing words like those takes me 3 minutes
but to write real codswallop
knows no limits

26 Oct 20 - 04:23 PM (#4076940)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

My poems are between
shel silverstien
and Gahon Wilson
for children

A little scary
a bit witty
not very hairy
and sometimes ******

26 Oct 20 - 05:18 PM (#4076946)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Example of an improvised spontaneous ditty
or as the kids say; bustin a rhyme

The 300 year scope
of slow motion slaughter
used chains, iron and rope
Today bullets go farther
and has to stop or the holocaust
will shatter your life

You always knew that
black lives matter.

Anything can be a poem and doesn't need to rhyme,
but there should be some sort of rhythm implied.

Amos often stuck to a strict format but toward the end blew me away with organic brevity. To each their own.

26 Oct 20 - 08:23 PM (#4076966)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

regarding the treacle:
I have not looked.
I do not know,
nor do I wish to know.

Cannot they who must not be named
reach a consensus concerning
the membership of the author of the treacle?

26 Oct 20 - 09:31 PM (#4076969)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Sorry I think I ate too much vintage candy today.
I even posted to Walkabout Verse to make it more interesting.

26 Oct 20 - 09:36 PM (#4076970)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Ms. Moore indeed! She should have collaborated with, or at least married, McGonnigle of faméd memory.

26 Oct 20 - 11:19 PM (#4076974)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

What you posted could earn you a libel suit. It has disappeared.

Poetry doesn't need to rhyme, but it certainly needs to make you think and enjoy it.

I posted a limerick in the "Do not post" thread because limericks are traditionally naughty and fun to write and lots of others have already been posted there.

27 Oct 20 - 06:37 AM (#4076992)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It was a review of Proust's most boring excretions of his pen sketching his intermitably bad anti verse in the vacuum of the innocuous. His writing was like a weapon in the Great Deadly Boring War. It is rare to find a baseline of the "most" in life but WAV is truely the most boring.
WARNING: Excessive reading of walkabout verse may cause catatonia and an inability to chew gum and walk.
Sue me.

27 Oct 20 - 07:16 AM (#4076993)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

While I am at it, it was delightful, refreshing and novel to see Stilly's limerick as a rare example of somthing she did not do well.
HAR Arrgh
Thar she is. She's human afterall. C'mon maties, to the small boats.
Bring all the lampoons.

27 Oct 20 - 06:29 PM (#4077039)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Bagpipe Music
by Louis Macneice

It's no go the merrygoround, it's no go the rickshaw,
All we want is a limousine and a ticket for the peepshow.
Their knickers are made of crepe-de-chine, their shoes are made of python,
Their halls are lined with tiger rugs and their walls with head of bison.

John MacDonald found a corpse, put it under the sofa,
Waited till it came to life and hit it with a poker,
Sold its eyes for souvenirs, sold its blood for whiskey,
Kept its bones for dumbbells to use when he was fifty.

It's no go the Yogi-man, it's no go Blavatsky,
All we want is a bank balance and a bit of skirt in a taxi.

Annie MacDougall went to milk, caught her foot in the heather,
Woke to hear a dance record playing of Old Vienna.

It's no go your maidenheads, it's no go your culture,
All we want is a Dunlop tire and the devil mend the puncture.

The Laird o' Phelps spent Hogmanay declaring he was sober,
Counted his feet to prove the fact and found he had one foot over.
Mrs. Carmichael had her fifth, looked at the job with repulsion,
Said to the midwife "Take it away; I'm through with overproduction."

It's no go the gossip column, it's no go the Ceilidh,
All we want is a mother's help and a sugar-stick for the baby.

Willie Murray cut his thumb, couldn't count the damage,
Took the hide of an Ayrshire cow and used it for a bandage.
His brother caught three hundred cran when the seas were lavish,
Threw the bleeders back in the sea and went upon the parish.

It's no go the Herring Board, it's no go the Bible,
All we want is a packet of fags when our hands are idle.

It's no go the picture palace, it's no go the stadium,
It's no go the country cot with a pot of pink geraniums,
It's no go the Government grants, it's no go the elections,
Sit on your arse for fifty years and hang your hat on a pension.

It's no go my honey love, it's no go my poppet;
Work your hands from day to day, the winds will blow the profit.
The glass is falling hour by hour, the glass will fall forever,
But if you break the bloody glass you won't hold up the weather.

27 Oct 20 - 11:21 PM (#4077062)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The thing is, if better words occur, I can go back and edit. It was a word salad meant to push WAV down the page, and for that, it worked. (I did enjoy the exercise. And I think my point was clear, correct?)

28 Oct 20 - 08:12 AM (#4077089)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In my long days when I was small
the world held secrets in its craw.
Couriosity abounded.
Serendipity astounded
and innate ideas were my dreams.
Secrets like all's not as it seems
were at odds with hold to the past.
What I was taught did try to last
but thankfully faded to know more.
The secrets I sought made me sore.
They were not mine,
they were not kind
There are better ideas when small
Most secrets aren't secrets at all.
Love works best
Forget the rest
Get on with your amazing life.

As Ebbie tells me "Don't quit your day job".
My day job is life.

28 Oct 20 - 08:31 AM (#4077091)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are dire rhymes that ring like a bell after every shout of "SHAME", or a like a klaxon bell at the end of a phrase.
It can still be used to amuse and sometimes claim praise,
but me it makes things sound PLAIN.

28 Oct 20 - 08:39 AM (#4077092)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I write a skeleton of a poem like below, then go back and edit.

28 Oct 20 - 10:33 AM (#4077101)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The limerick I composed was full of cross-outs and lines added above and below. Writing poetry on paper, not the computer screen, means I'm looking at all of my attempts at once and can revert back in places easily. MOM suggests it's a waste of paper, but whatever. :)

28 Oct 20 - 01:51 PM (#4077133)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are dire rhymes
that ring like a bell

after every shout of "SHAME"
like a klaxon bell

at end of phrase.
used to amuse or praise

But to me it makes important things
sound patheticly PLAIN.

It makes things so cutesy wootsy
sometimes it hurts my brain.

28 Oct 20 - 02:27 PM (#4077136)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

All my poems
are quick and easy
Bound by a chat room box

It may be, about a tree
or a notion
of a potion or a pox

There are some so cheesy
they really are easy
as Rhyme zone on pot

ditties and verse
are not from the forests
but a big fat Thesaurus

such as:

Trump gave such a tongue lashing tirade
in denunciating condemnation and blame
of all the disloyal crazies
He put them all to shame...

28 Oct 20 - 03:10 PM (#4077139)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

...only in the eyes of Trump's gunmen.

28 Oct 20 - 09:09 PM (#4077176)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A complacent old Don of Divinity
Made boast of his daughter's virginity.
They must have been dawdlin'
Down at old Magdalen --
It could never have happened at Trinity.

There was a young man from Dunbar
Who playfully pickled his ma.
When he finished his work
He remarked with a smirk,
"This will make quite a family jar."

Concerning the bees and the flowers
In the fields and gardens and bowers,
You will note at a glance
That their ways of romance
Haven't any resemblance to ours.

28 Oct 20 - 09:39 PM (#4077182)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Those are good
But there is a resemblance even in Corals, Morels or Sorrels
The only exception is oral.

Birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
In Spain, the best upper sets do it
Lithuanians and Latts do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
The Dutch in old Amsterdam do it
Not to mention the Fins
Folks in Siam do it - think of Siamese twins
Some Argentines, without means, do it
People say in Boston even beans do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
Romantic sponges, they say, do it
Oysters down in oyster bay do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
Cold Cape Cod clams, 'gainst their wish, do it
Even lazy jellyfish, do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
Electric eels I might add do it
Though it shocks em I know
Why ask if shad do it - Waiter bring me
"Shad roe"
In shallow shoals English soles do it
Goldfish in the privacy of bowls do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
Transcribed (from the stated recording) by Todd Peach
Other verses I've seen in print follow:
In old Japan, all the Japs do it
Up in Lapland little Laps do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love
The chimpanzees in the zoos do it
Some courageous kangaroos do it
Let's do it, let's
Fall in love
I'm sure giraffes on the sly do it
Even eagles as they fly do it
Let's do it, let's fall
In love
Electric eels I might add do it
Though it shocks em I know
Why ask if shad do it - garcon de
"Shad roe"
The world admits bears in pits do it
Even Pekingeses at the Ritz do it
Let's do it, let's
Fall in love

29 Oct 20 - 09:33 AM (#4077246)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You have to take everyone with the initials DJT.

29 Oct 20 - 12:07 PM (#4077276)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

DJT had a severe sibalance seizure. Its uncertain if he sustained permanent suckhood, staff said he sounded like a Macys super sized Thanksgiving Spiderman snagged on a spike.

29 Oct 20 - 12:12 PM (#4077278)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Scheriff Sedgewig is suspecting suicide.

29 Oct 20 - 04:48 PM (#4077333)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

To me english sounds like a bunch of sss' followed by k's and t's.
English is the Slitherin of languages.
German sounds gruff and unct.
Hebrew sounds like ancient egyptian as much as Yiddih sounds German.
French and Italien seem melodic and Chinese the most melodic of all complete with agreed upon pitch and rhythm.
My own language, a youthful vestige of dyslexia, was never spoken but only written. Its Greek to me now. I think it was still a Rebus language.

29 Oct 20 - 11:42 PM (#4077376)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

COVID-19 is racing to the polls along with all of the voters. MOM voted absentee by mail and got notification that it was accepted. All of the back yard chickens have absentee ballots that were dropped off at various mailboxes around town.

30 Oct 20 - 08:28 AM (#4077432)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I'm gonna take my horse to the polling place
Gonna make sure my country's in the global race
Gonna wait in line till I can't no more
Gonna make my vote like I did for Gore

I'm gonna ride my horse past A R 15's
Past guys making sure that they look cold and mean
Gonna wait a month for the last result
While lil donnie trump makes his last insult

OO-OOOO-O OOO

They call the wind 'the liar'
They say it says 'you're fired'

Gonna face next year with a cup of Joe
Gonna hope the nazis will decide to go.
They got lots of friends in the pen today
Along with all the ass holes in the KKK

30 Oct 20 - 12:54 PM (#4077468)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Actually my voting only took 5 minutes and was friendly and civil as always.

30 Oct 20 - 09:15 PM (#4077531)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I researched the candidates online (https://www.lwv.org/elections/vote411) then sat at the kitchen table and filled out my ballot. I mailed it at the post office in late September and it arrived on Oct. 2. It has been accepted so will be counted.

31 Oct 20 - 09:57 AM (#4077593)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Pat dropped our ballots off in early October and yes, they've been accepted. As I drive past the Elections Office I see at least four, and usually more, people going in to vote early. I'm a little annoyed by the political signs outside the office, urging us to vote for someone with the surname "Here." Whoever this "Here" is, he or she certainly wasn't on my ballot!

31 Oct 20 - 10:01 AM (#4077595)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

By the way, for the first time in 138 years the Legion Hovel was designated as a polling place. It was almost instantly revoked when the Elections Commission inspection team visited.

Well, there's next year, and the year after that, and the year after that....

01 Nov 20 - 04:17 PM (#4077784)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

"let's do it" ...
but have you heard Dinah Washington sing it?
Heaven can wait.

01 Nov 20 - 05:05 PM (#4077792)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Trouble is, they have to stop serving alcohol if the election folks are going to use the building and the bartender refused to go home or stop pouring drinks. He said it was a public service to keep the stress levels down.

01 Nov 20 - 09:32 PM (#4077813)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

And since Prohibition ended, Legionnaires sell their votes for cash, not drinks. This year, one vote is $20.00, two for $35, three for $60, and so on. In 2016 Boldface Smitty made enough to spend a month on the "Mexican Riviera."

02 Nov 20 - 09:00 AM (#4077873)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

By the way, the Hovel never stops "serving liquor." You just go get your own; nobody brings it to you. It is, in fact, that way year 'round. Even mixed drinks, like the "Purple Pickle Zombie" you make yourself. Barkeep Barbara just tells you what to do (and you'd better do it!).

02 Nov 20 - 09:34 AM (#4077875)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Beyond alcohol is a drink of Telepathine aka Harmine. It is an ingredient in ayahuesca without all the crap.
Its also legal and prolific. I first discovered it as an ingredient in Romilar 60 years ago. As its name suggests it does enhance telepathic abilities. In general it is a dreamy clear minded stimulant. It is a secret ingredient in some micro breweries.
https://www.medchemexpress.com/Harmine.html?src=google-product&gclid=CjwKCAiA-f78BRBbEiwATKRRBD1AY5VcGlX-Mvl_A6Kyl_yGyNb2qrPOF1p

If you are curious about how healthy this stuff is, check out Wiki
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harmine

A sweet drink can counteract its alcoloid bitterness.

I'm starting to think it slows down telemerase loss.
I would only share this info with friends.
It is not a daily supplement kind of thing so drink respondsibly.

02 Nov 20 - 04:29 PM (#4077920)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Our VFW bought a barrell of election whiskey - To celebrate or commiserate.

02 Nov 20 - 04:53 PM (#4077921)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

When I look out my front door
What do you think's in store
When I look in the bushs
So many mosquitos at dusk
Those bloodsuckers
Very strange

You've got to stare at every itch
You've got to slap every bitch
females bite to feed their young
Oh no, must be the season
Oh no, must be the season

Oh no, must be the season of the itch
When I look over my shoulder
What do you think I see
Mosquitos lookin' at me
Its so strange

Now its turnin colder
Its the silent biters plight
But come next year
When I'm older
It will be another fight

Oh no...

02 Nov 20 - 06:22 PM (#4077936)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Scotch is the therapeutic of choice this week, has been for a couple of weeks now. Take the edge off and then turn off the news and it gets even better.

02 Nov 20 - 07:04 PM (#4077944)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I prefer our family vintage, La Bonne Merde (Chateau Athens, 2009). Estate selection and bottled, of course. A small run of an excellent red wine, assuming the air hasn't gotten to it. The only bottle that remains is on my mantle, gently aging in glass. It will almost certainly be the last.

02 Nov 20 - 09:14 PM (#4077962)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

However, there might be a bottle or two of bourbon, rye, Irish, Scotch, Wyoming, and other whiskeys and whiskies around, as well as some Moab (YES!!) distillery gin.

03 Nov 20 - 11:10 AM (#4078077)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Let's get back to the head of the queue, Mom.
Better vantage point up there
for all the Election Day commotion.

03 Nov 20 - 08:32 PM (#4078139)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Right now the vantage point is from the cheap seats, with the prognosticators. I like the numbers guy on MSNBC, but it's too early.

I took the Biden sign out of my yard, on the off chance that Trump supporters decide to take a loss out on the supporters when they lose. If Biden wins I'm not worried that anyone will take it out on my neighbor's house (with the Trump sign).

03 Nov 20 - 08:41 PM (#4078143)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I put the TV on Ice Road Truckers and slept.
Maybe tommorrow I'll take a look at cable news.

03 Nov 20 - 09:31 PM (#4078149)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The Grand Ballroom and Basketball Court at the Legion Hovel has the traditional net filled with the traditional water balloons ready to drop in the revelers when the outcome of the election is more-or-less known. It's the only bath some of the attendees get in four years.

04 Nov 20 - 11:01 PM (#4078264)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Up we go, Mom.

05 Nov 20 - 07:46 AM (#4078315)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Earth has been an outlieing amusment park for the Galactic Overlords and have announced through their mouthpiece 'Q-Anon' that Donald Trump is the winner by lawsuits waged by Saul&Son. The only thing changed is that Trump is now the alternative fact President from the White House in Mara Lago. The tweets continue hourly.

Biden has contracted movers to help settle into the basement of the White House.

05 Nov 20 - 02:53 PM (#4078363)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Have yourself a solitary christmas
make the yule grind low
eat chocolate covered cherries
till its time to throw

Up above, it looks like its about time to snow
and have yourself a very little christmas OW
now you've done it you choked on an ornament
and there's no one there to Himlick you.

no one near to you
oh dear

The warm north pole is practicly deserted
the jobs went way down south
Look in the mirror and feel flirted with
discouraged with
yourself

So have youself an angry little Xmas now.

05 Nov 20 - 08:18 PM (#4078403)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Do you mean 90° North, or the magnetic North Pole? The magnetic North Pole has been moving towards Siberia.

05 Nov 20 - 09:23 PM (#4078408)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Santa's workshop is going left to the Commies? I thought they went to Mexico. We need right wing Workshop watchers to slow down or stop the toys.

05 Nov 20 - 09:49 PM (#4078413)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We can not allow illegal alien Hecho a Mexico TOYS to cross our border.
Caravans of toys are breeching our walls and are carrying covid and leprosy. Better Putin Red toys than rapist hispanic illegal tickle me Elmos.

06 Nov 20 - 10:43 AM (#4078483)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Its clear to see throughout history that
mankind loves the lie.
Warlords, religion and politicians
all use the childs cry
to get what they want although they're not hurt
for food love or thirst.

We lie to ourself with truth on the shelf
for war, love and gain.
The lie is the path for the psychopath
or a King to reign.
Belief is a knife that can stab your heart.
So take care if you wish to remain.

06 Nov 20 - 02:02 PM (#4078500)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

As a poet of parody,
prose and rhyme
I find it perverse
that Walkabout Verse
will last in time
like a curse

Pin light from stars
that shine like past scars
are words that can be seen.
If words are organized
it may make a footprint
in the ground

After we die
and can't advertise
its all up to posterity
IF dead words fossilize
Others will realize
form outlives substance.

But then you'll be dead
You can't be flattered
and it won't matter
as words slowly
turn to dust

06 Nov 20 - 09:40 PM (#4078550)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yet let me flap this bug with gilded wings,
This painted child of dirt that stinks and stings;
Whose buzz the witty and the fair annoys,
Yet wit ne'er tastes, and beauty ne'r enjoys,
So well-bred spaniels civilly delight
In mumbling of the game they dare not bite.
Eternal smiles his emptiness betray,
As shallow streams run dimpling all the way.
Whether in florid impotence he speaks,
And, as the prompter breathes, the puppet squeaks;
Or at the ear of Eve, familiar toad,
Half froth, half venom, spits himself abroad,
In puns, or politics, or tales, or lies,
Or spite, or smut, or rhymes, or blasphemies.
His wit all see-saw, between that and this ,
Now high, now low, now Master up, now Miss,
And he himself one vile antithesis.
Amphibious thing! that acting either part,
The trifling head, or the corrupted heart,
Fop at the toilet, flatt'rer at the board,
Now trips a lady, and now struts a lord.
Eve's tempter thus the rabbins have express'd,
A cherub's face, a reptile all the rest;
Beauty that shocks you, parts that none will trust,
Wit that can creep, and pride that licks the dust.

Not fortune's worshipper, nor fashion's fool,
Not lucre's madman, nor ambition's tool,
Not proud, nor servile, be one poet's praise,
That, if he pleas'd, he pleas'd by manly ways;
That flatt'ry, even to kings, he held a shame,
And thought a lie in verse or prose the same:
That not in fancy's maze he wander'd long,
But stoop'd to truth, and moraliz'd his song:
That not for fame, but virtue's better end,
He stood the furious foe, the timid friend,
The damning critic, half-approving wit,
The coxcomb hit, or fearing to be hit;
Laugh'd at the loss of friends he never had,
The dull, the proud, the wicked, and the mad;
The distant threats of vengeance on his head,
The blow unfelt, the tear he never shed;
The tale reviv'd, the lie so oft o'erthrown;
Th' imputed trash, and dulness not his own;
The morals blacken'd when the writings 'scape;
The libell'd person, and the pictur'd shape;
Abuse, on all he lov'd, or lov'd him, spread,
A friend in exile, or a father, dead;
The whisper, that to greatness still too near,
Perhaps, yet vibrates on his sovereign's ear:—
Welcome for thee, fair Virtue! all the past:
For thee, fair Virtue! welcome ev'n the last!

07 Nov 20 - 01:13 AM (#4078555)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

To strive for virtue's better end
feels like it would be enough.
but there is room for much more.
So much in fact, we oft ignore.

07 Nov 20 - 08:06 AM (#4078587)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rap did you feel guilty or inadequate when you wrote that ? :^)

No, I can't forget that evening
Or Fox News as votes were leaving
But I guess that's just the way the story goes
I always yell but in my eyes my anger grows
Yes, it grows
No, I can't forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrows
I had the white house then they turned off the power
And now it is not fair they turned off the power
The fucking power
I can't lie, if lieing is without power
I can't grift, I can't gripe any more
Can't live, if living is without TV !
I can't tweet, I can't tweet any more!
Well, I can't forget that evening
Or the anger of them stealing
But I guess that's just the…

07 Nov 20 - 09:49 PM (#4078688)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Neque sermonibus vulgi dederis te, nec in præmiis spem posueris rerum tuarum; suis te oportet illecebris ipsa virtus trahat ad verum decus. Quid de te alii loquantur, ipsi videant, sed loquentur tamen.

08 Nov 20 - 02:39 PM (#4078788)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Res ipsos loquitor.

08 Nov 20 - 03:35 PM (#4078799)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I'm going to go through the house a room at a time dusting everything. By the time I finish it will be time to start over again. I'm going to be virtuous and not ignore the dust.

Did someone trigger the balloons at the Legion Hovel?

08 Nov 20 - 09:55 PM (#4078839)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Always. The first batch of balloons to fall contains plain old water to wet down the merry-makers and the second half contains a 50-50 solution of soap and disinfectant. After everyone is clean and dry (warm air spray) they are liberally sprayed with DDT (the last legal use of that in the world) to kill off any and all insects infesting hair, beards, and other body hair and orifices. The fire department's hazmat team then does their job with the DDT-laced residue and everyone has some more "Portneuf Lemonade", toasts the newly-elected, and heads to their home or a house of some sort or other.

09 Nov 20 - 01:00 AM (#4078846)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Keeps the malaria down also.

09 Nov 20 - 12:56 PM (#4078923)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I ordered a heating pad and lidocaine from Amazon yesterday (Sunday) at 3PM and it arrived 4 hours later.
I ordered a silk carpet from China and it took nearly 72 hours.

09 Nov 20 - 04:57 PM (#4078950)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Quid de te alii loquantur, ipsi videant, sed loquentur tamen. ["... you will not any longer attend to the vulgar mob's gossip nor put your trust in human rewards for your deeds; virtue, through her own charms, should lead you to true glory.

-only in a tolerent democracy-

09 Nov 20 - 05:36 PM (#4078956)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Is there a preacher, much bemus'd in beer,
A maudlin poetess or rhyming peer anywhere?
A jerk, forelorned his father's soul to cross,
Who pens a stanza, when he should egress?
Is there, who, lock'd from ink and paper, scrawls
With desp'rate sharpie round his bathroom walls?
All fly to Tweet, and in angry strain
HE tries to keep them mad or vain.
Donald, whose giddy son neglects the laws,
Imputes and damn'd my works for cause:
Poor Donald sees his frantic life go down,
And curseing wit, and poetry, he drowns,
In his arrogance, rhetorical sputum and shit
His next election will end with a hit.

10 Nov 20 - 01:48 PM (#4079077)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I was with you up to the last line. There will be no more elections for that cretin. Only prison. His loyal zealots are blocking access to GSA facilities and dollars to the new administration. I suspect court hearings will soon follow.

10 Nov 20 - 03:58 PM (#4079095)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

hehe "I fully expect a smooth transition from republican prez to inmate." quote Mike Pompous

Let the punishment fit the crime;
Tell him that there is a toilet paper shortage in prison
force him to walk the ramp
give him a flesh eating infection and deny its serious
while in solitary tell him only bizaar lies
Play 'He's a Loser' in his cell 24/7
Let guards eat chocolate cake in front of him
Do not allow any other white person on the prison block
When Golf digest comes on the TV change channel to MSNBC
Promise him Putin will visit - but never comes
Ask him if he would prefer an Epstein resolution.
Tell him James Baker and Dershowitz are his lawyers but Rudy shows up instead

10 Nov 20 - 04:47 PM (#4079097)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Sugar in the gas tank, sand in the gears
gum up all the works, for years and years
The brat wants sweet revenge for losing face.
Its not his fault should he lose a race.
All his 2 faced friends agree he won.
Pretending that he's right is kinda fun.
He's the kinda kid who steals the trophy.
He eats chocolate cake and drinks kofefe.

10 Nov 20 - 08:15 PM (#4079113)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

What we had for dinner this evening. Not as good as eating it in Alsace in Joseph and Arlette's garage and fresh from the cooker, but I do recommend it. Hint: it's NOT a pizza.

11 Nov 20 - 05:43 PM (#4079270)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom, I woke up with a numb left arm this morning. I got to ride in an ambulance to the horsespittle and they did scans and all and found I'd had a stroke (not of good luck). I'm going to get my right carotid artery reamed out on the 16th because the surgeon said that it's full of "junk" -- a medical term, so you'll have to look it up. Tomorrow is an echocardiogram and pre-op is Friday the 13th and surgery (that is, the throatcutting) is Monday the 16th.

We'd planned to stay home for Thanksgiving anyway this year.

11 Nov 20 - 06:23 PM (#4079274)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Plumbing problems are best done sooner than later. I so hope the numbness is only sensory. People need an embollism like a hole in the head. A carotoid stint? Repair under by pass? Let us know how it goes when convenient. Clogged pipes are better than anurisms but good health is best. Get well as healing allows. Good thoughts are turned up to 11.

11 Nov 20 - 08:16 PM (#4079286)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

What Donuel said.

11 Nov 20 - 08:35 PM (#4079287)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Carotid stents are not his treatment of choice. He opens the artery, uses a plunger first and then a Roto-rooter machine and hopes he doesn't bust the pipe.

Seriously, he said stents can cause plaque to build up on the surface. I have to believe the surgeon because I'm not up to doing this myself.

11 Nov 20 - 10:40 PM (#4079292)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Have Pat take along some of her quilting materials and other crafts - does she have any knitting needles or really fine crochet hooks? They might come in handy. Just ask the head surgical assistant to throw those in the autoclave before the surgery so he has them available.

12 Nov 20 - 09:38 AM (#4079355)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

She can't come into the hospital. They tightened the rules a couple weeks ago -- no visitors! Surgery is being done at the Idaho Legion Hovel Surgical Center and Horseface Ike Memorial Delirium Tremens Ward

13 Nov 20 - 01:15 AM (#4079424)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: JennieG

Geez, Rap......I pop in this morning to check up on how folks are doing and what do I find!

Here's wishing you a non-eventful stay in the horsepittal, and I hope Nurse Natched is kind.

13 Nov 20 - 12:16 PM (#4079483)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Have Pat slip those items in your pocket when you head into the building then. And both of you stay safe. This pandemic is no B.S.

13 Nov 20 - 09:44 PM (#4079551)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

10 a.m. Monday, Mountain Standard Time (about 1700 GMT). My surgeon.

14 Nov 20 - 12:40 AM (#4079558)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The mama pajama rolled out of bed
And she ran to the police station
When the papa found out he began to shout
And he started the investigation
It's against the law
It was against the law
What the mama saw
It was against the law
The mama looked down and spit on the ground
Every time his name gets mentioned
The papa said, "oy, if I get that boy
I'm gonna stick him in the house of detention"
Well I'm on my way
I don't know where I'm going
I'm on my way
I'm taking my time
But I don't know where
Goodbye to Maggie, the queen of Corona
Seein' me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard
Seein' me and Julio
Down by the schoolyard
Whoa, in a couple days they come and take him away
But the press let the story leak
And then the radical priest
Came to visit the clink
they found he had escaped
Where Julio is I don't know
They say he's in Idaho
to do his unique procedure
If they catch that boy practice medicine again
They're gonna stick him in the house of detention
I'm on my way...

15 Nov 20 - 08:29 AM (#4079708)
Subject: PRE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM!! Stop mourning and tearing your hair out and GIT BACK UP TO THE TOP WHERE YOU BELONG!!!!!!

16 Nov 20 - 05:09 AM (#4079795)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Off for the throat-cutting in an hour and fifteen minutes, Mom. Well, I have to be there in an hour and fifty minutes.

Don't doctors and medical people SLEEP? You'd think they'd been up all night!

16 Nov 20 - 02:48 PM (#4079857)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Hoping all went well. I've always wondered about those early starts. And it seems when you finally get yourself psyched for heading over at 6:30am they call and tell you to be there at 5:45am instead.

17 Nov 20 - 01:05 PM (#4079967)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Sweet exquisite pain. There is such a thing. Like when I laughed surprisingly when they set my broken ankle. But last night wasn't funny. I thought of Tom Hanks in Castaway who was in so much tooth pain that he had to improvise. This morning I had a root canal and I am glad it took only 15 minutes. Was it worth the risk, I'll know in 14 days. Oh sweet relief.

17 Nov 20 - 08:56 PM (#4080014)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I'm home. Instead of three nights in the resort I spent one. However! The hypoglossal nerve was stretched, and so I have difficulty with some speech patterns, eating, and swallowing. I'm told it will get back to normal in a couple of weeks, but I'll be doing "tongue strengthening" exercises in the meantime.

Home health care comes tomorrow afternoon for "admitting." If you want to see a picture of my wound, I'll send you one via email. I can't imagine why you'd want to.

17 Nov 20 - 11:40 PM (#4080018)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Too bad its vertical. Horizontal would look like Frankenstien.
scar

18 Nov 20 - 09:00 AM (#4080060)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You mean, I'm sure, Frankenstein's monster. This
gentleman, Viktor von Frankenstein, is certainly no monster!

18 Nov 20 - 09:33 AM (#4080069)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Monsters like children of white supremacists or the SS sound dangerous but it all depends on how they were raised and carefully taught.
My step dad Nate was 100% Jewish.
He was a clerk in the US Army in London but saw action in Germany at the end of the war. By clever paper schuffling and clerk magic fairy dust he managed to adopt me from a Liebensborne orphanage in Dusseldorf at the urging from a rabbi that said it would be a mitzvah and atonement for killing nazis. While most GI's were bringing home booty, my step dad brought me to America to meet my step mom in the midwest. My biological parents were probably strangers to each other but its unknown with no German documents. As a pig in a poke I was probably a disappointment since I was not a scholar or avid reader early on due to dyslexia I discovered decades later. I did very poorly with languages.

Starting with Hebrew study to be bar mitvahed I was given the choice of religious studies or not. I chose not, but more or less I identified with the culture.
Later on I heard that Ghandi advised a Hindu to adopt a Muslim man's son after the tragic killing of the father and bring up the boy as a Muslim to attone. There were a couple of moral parallels with my adoption but sort of opposite to my history. One thing is for sure - I'm walking proof that there was no German master race unless it was Eienstien .
One possible irony was that my first girl friend, Priscilla Stephanie von Dieseldorf, from Guatamala was the child of a German couple who escaped Germany in the 40's and joined the grandfather who was an archeologist unearthing the Mayan civilization.
What does all this mean? Mostly that Ancestry.com would be a waste of my time, nurture trumps nature and that kids of the KKK turn out krazy if raised by dad. :^/

18 Nov 20 - 10:27 AM (#4080080)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A coffee plantation supplied the funding for the archeological expeditions. The German founded coffee

https://www.dieseldorff.coffee/ still exists

https://lal.tulane.edu/sites/default/files/lal/docs/Collection%20212%20Guide.pdf

18 Nov 20 - 11:13 AM (#4080089)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Heck, I could've saved Rap a lot of money—I had to rent a sewer machine to cut tree roots out of the line. Dip it in a little alcohol and Zip your problem's gone (okay, okay, so is your head . . . )

It's the thought that counts.

18 Nov 20 - 02:46 PM (#4080128)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The Legion Hovel bartender would provide the anesthesia.

18 Nov 20 - 06:17 PM (#4080151)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Sitting in this very chair and spot at 0630 today a half-dozen elk ran up the golf course. First elk I've seen, but mule deer, moose, wolf, and other critters are sometimes seen.

18 Nov 20 - 06:50 PM (#4080155)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Whew Stilly, that was really in the spirit of MOAB.

Todays cartoons;
A lonely Trump at a kids lemonade stand with a sign 'Pardons 4 SALE'
500 Mil.

Another version has a long line of customers including McConnell, the Trump kids, Lindsey etc. Rudy with his pockets turned out walks away with a shrug.

Giant ghostly figure of Mao Tse Tung saying in chinese (with english subtitles} GO Trump GO!

18 Nov 20 - 10:56 PM (#4080171)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Thanks! I thought so! Amos seemed to generate this stuff effortlessly, some of us have to put on our "not being a grownup today" hats and come up with silliness. He sent such effortless BS, and from such a vein of rich imagination.

19 Nov 20 - 07:03 AM (#4080193)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [Facebook News]
From: Donuel

Oregon counties (22 of 32 counties) hope to vote to secede and join 'Greater Idaho'. So far they have 2 counties commited to join Greater Idaho. However no one thought to ask Idahoans what they think.

19 Nov 20 - 07:31 AM (#4080200)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Yeah, and there are some in Washington as well. Montana, Wyoming, Utah, Colorado don't seem to think it's a good idea.

Constitutionally, part of a state can secede from another and join something else IF AND ONLY IF both state legislatures agree and Congresss agrees. Aint' gonna happen!

19 Nov 20 - 12:29 PM (#4080252)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

breaking wind news: 7 Million Trump mail in votes were found in a brothel in St. Petersburg Russia !
Rudy has an explanation. He will 'splain tommorow for a cheeseburger today.

19 Nov 20 - 12:49 PM (#4080256)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think if anything Washington state will join British Columbia. A much better move, in my opinion.

19 Nov 20 - 08:15 PM (#4080293)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Idaho could become South Alberta.

21 Nov 20 - 08:42 AM (#4080461)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All S [annex]
From: Rapparee

Heavens to Betsey, Mom!! I know pre-meridial exercise is blasphemy unto your deeply held beliefs, but please crawl back up where you belong. I left a new bottle of gin up there just for you!

21 Nov 20 - 03:32 PM (#4080504)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

For the first time in a long time the dining table is in good shape as far as easily clearing and setting for Thanksgiving. Especially since it only needs room for one place-setting. MOM can bring some of her gin over and we'll sit out on the back patio and watch the dogs chase squirrels after dinner.

21 Nov 20 - 06:04 PM (#4080528)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Come to think of it there are several states that would be much better off as Canadian Provinces.

22 Nov 20 - 08:12 AM (#4080575)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One seat at the Thanksgiving table

The poignant epitomy of pathos

sounds like a folk song

22 Nov 20 - 09:00 AM (#4080576)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It looks like Pinterest is going all in for the one person Thanksgiving. Be the first on your block to get the Siri and Siri like apps to create a dialog of the crazy Thanks giving uncle, the critical mother in law, crying kids, Debbie Downer and Karen like creatures.
Toys are also influenced by current events like "Don't breathe on me" Elmo, "i'm so worried" Telly and "EV'RYTHING IS GREAT" Trumpybear.

Some recipes are easy to prepare like the 6 five hour energy shots on a plate and goblet of Gin.

23 Nov 20 - 11:50 AM (#4080673)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

We're staying home this year, and no, I'm not even going to the Legion Hovel. For one thing, roof of the nave caved in a couple nights ago, leading to the creation of the "Navecave" drink: grain alcohol, schnapps, Jim Beam (get it?), and prune juice concentrate. If you don't cave in Butch the Bartender will use his blackjack to see that you do.

23 Nov 20 - 03:43 PM (#4080700)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I give up

Its put up or shut up
Living is too exclusive
to be smartly cell phoneless,
I now have the great artificial brain

To be without a smart phone
is to miss the great waster of time
To not ignore your fellow man
to be free of sinister algorhythms

Now I Get to pay for my soylent green BURger
with an expensive device
WITH DIGITAL COUPON
But I won't be caught dead
on Facebook

23 Nov 20 - 05:51 PM (#4080715)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Heil to the good ol boys
heart of the master race.
With Trump on our side - Oy!
our blood can't be defaced

by blacks or spics or Jews.
We'll even kill the Irish
You're next, to name a few
We'll help you all to perish

by our militia's best.
It seems that some of our own
can't pass the purity test - Oops
there goes the last good ol boy

where facists go to rest

23 Nov 20 - 06:21 PM (#4080720)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

We're going to trade food for Thanksgiving; I'll hand over half of a roast chicken and some homemade dinner rolls and he'll bring by half of a pumpkin pie. Then we'll all eat dinner at our own houses. MOM said something about killing germs with some glasses of gin and tonics out on the screened in porch. (That would be fancying it up for the holiday).

23 Nov 20 - 07:44 PM (#4080728)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live without nazis on my side
But then I spent so many nights thinking how Dems did me wrong
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along
And so they're back
From outer space
I walked in on crazy Dems with that smile upon their face
I should have changed the secret service, I should have hidden white house keys

If I'd known for just one second they'd be back to bother me
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not welcome anywhere
Weren't you the one who tried to impeach me with your ugly lies?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd runaway and hide?
Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to fire, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got all the basest base and know that Fox news will survive
I will survive, hey, hey

It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying hard to sue in court to mend my broken heart
And I spent oh-so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to tweet
But now I tweet in complete sentences and golf some place new
I'm not that chained-up giant person born just to hate you
And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free
Well, now I'm planning a long term coup for 2024
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not welcome at my door
Weren't you the one who tried to break me with your lies?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to golf, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got Putin on my side so I know I will survive
I will survive
Oh
Go on now, go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Cause you're not for tyrants anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to hoax the news
and tell all those ugly lies?
You think I'd grow stale?
You think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I, I will prevail
Oh, as long as I know how to fix elections, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got all my hate to give and I'll survive
I will survive
I will survive

Dear Mr. Trump your biggest lie is that you will survive
No one leaves this planet alive

23 Nov 20 - 08:49 PM (#4080741)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Oldie but still appropriate and a goody.

24 Nov 20 - 07:02 PM (#4080853)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I knew about the John Birch Society since my Dad was a poli sci professor in the 50's. They the acorn that is now a tree.

25 Nov 20 - 05:44 PM (#4080946)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Has it ever occurred to anyone else that radical fringe groups have patience and goad the more precipitous among them to act so that the patient ones can use the actions against the actors?

25 Nov 20 - 09:05 PM (#4080971)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The long game is insideous. Lotsa frog boilin goin on.

26 Nov 20 - 01:39 PM (#4081062)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think it's occurring to a lot of people about now. "Frog boiling" is right!

26 Nov 20 - 09:47 PM (#4081094)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I believe that I shall begin reading the works of Howard of Warwick.

27 Nov 20 - 12:39 PM (#4081138)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

How are you feeling, Rap? Are you back to firing blunderbusses or waving various swords around?

I'm sorting out the greenhouse this afternoon, and MOM reminded me to leave the porch swing out there so she can go take a nap on sunny afternoons.

27 Nov 20 - 09:21 PM (#4081167)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

If you are offering me a blunderbuss this is a nice one in 10 gauge; they also have one in 4 gauge. This kit is on USD 999.99, too, and I get to put it together. I have found that a blunderbuss is quite a good argument not to "stand and deliver" a coach!

No, I haven't been doing either in the past few months. First the SARS-Covid-19 and now surgery recovery. I probably won't make the Christmas party either. Now, as the song says, the ground is white...and going to the range in winter can be iffy. Sliding off an icy road that clings to the side of hill can test your seat belts! It's also cold and windy up there. But a set of longjohns and a good coat and hat and gloves...well, maybe.

On February 10 I present a program called something like "The Recent Crime Spree in Idaho: 1840-1910 or so" for the local continuing education group (New Knowledge Adventures, or NKA). I've done these before; this one will concentrate on names like David Updycke, Boon Helm, Henry Amos Plummer, Marion More, Jack Slade, and a few others. Bear in mind that the towns of Bannack and Virginia City, Montana were in the Idaho Territory in 1864.

In the meantime, I recuperate and play my horn. Speech therapist, a wonderful person and fellow trumpeter, said it would be excellent exercise for tongue and cheek muscles -- much better than the tongue push-ups I thought he'd order.

Swallowing is still a problem and will be for a while.

28 Nov 20 - 06:26 AM (#4081185)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In lieu of Thanksgiving travel this year I went to the nearest parallel universe where I am am glad to say there is no pandemic. However Trump is still President there so I returned the same day. It was an empty trade off coming home.

28 Nov 20 - 01:27 PM (#4081229)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Apropos of nothing.

28 Nov 20 - 05:07 PM (#4081250)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

That reminds me. With my new cell phone I should post a youtube of my 'unique' ukelello playing.

28 Nov 20 - 09:09 PM (#4081267)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Someday...I'll sing again. Assuming the restraining order had been lifted.

29 Nov 20 - 06:33 AM (#4081285)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Do it out of State. Witnesses rarely travel long distance to testify.

29 Nov 20 - 06:39 PM (#4081353)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Out of which state? Confusion? Perplexity?

30 Nov 20 - 02:02 PM (#4081435)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

State of Conciousness?

You and Stilly both obey Zipf's law but I have found that Trump does not graph at a 45 angle. This suggests Donald may have a mutation on the fox p2 gene. Trump is breaking Zipf's Law!

30 Nov 20 - 09:12 PM (#4081469)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Among others, yes.

01 Dec 20 - 07:09 AM (#4081512)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Even Dolphin's obey Zipf's law. I like the irony of the involvment of the Fox p2 gene aiding his law breaking. That gene is respondsible for more complex vocalizations accross many species of birds to mice and men.

01 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM (#4081581)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I think that the Presidental actions are more and more representative of Titius-Bode's Law.

02 Dec 20 - 12:21 PM (#4081679)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Except for the fact that his BS is toxic, Trump has been creating so much BS lately that he is *almost* an honorary member of the group. But he would be wise to subscribe to the adage that he doesn't want to join any club that would have him.

02 Dec 20 - 07:11 PM (#4081713)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Today his 46 minute speech was about why Biden is not the President and named who are enemies of the people for certifying a fraud.

Death threats are the new Hallmark greeting cards.

02 Dec 20 - 09:00 PM (#4081720)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Fringe speakers in Georgia are saying Trump won by 80 million votes and 410 'electrical votes'.

02 Dec 20 - 09:27 PM (#4081721)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Saw my doctor yesterday and the surgeon today. Apparently a carotid endarterectomy is a major surgical procedure. I've been told that for the last couple of weeks, but I now have a copy of the operative notes and am forced to agree that having your throat cut is major surgery. However, the surgeon estimated that only 20 cc's of blood were lost. And from what they said I'm doing pretty well for someone who had major surgery.

The CAT scan and MRI notes say that my skull is intact and that no gross abnormalities were found...just little ones, apparently.

03 Dec 20 - 12:32 AM (#4081725)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I've had surgery before, soft-tissue stuff, and a bunionectomy. The knee tops all of that for the "Major" part of major surgery. It is sometimes better that we don't realize how big these things are until after the fact.

03 Dec 20 - 05:47 AM (#4081754)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

A happy routine outcome with no need for bypass or gross transfusion is what you want. Every procedure has a whoops or two. When they don't matter, YOU WIN.

Other than expense, the reason there should not be routine MRI's is because they invariably show small abnormalities. In Boston I met a woman who was on the team that developed real time MRI's. Back then there was propriatary caution involved in discussions.

03 Dec 20 - 09:29 AM (#4081772)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

This surgery started, according to the surgical notes, with a "time-out" until everyone agreed. I'm glad I was well under anesthesia as I probably couldn't have taken all the arguing a yelling -- I had enough of that as a kid.

03 Dec 20 - 09:33 AM (#4081773)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My last post was 1630, the number of the house where I grew to immaturity. Obviously this is A Sign, an Omen, of some sort. It must be propitious, as well. Shall I play the lottery? Perhaps even take a shower? Shall I bet that Biden wins the election? Oh, whatever can it mean?!

03 Dec 20 - 12:16 PM (#4081789)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There are some doorways you can go through with little effort but great reward. If it can't hurt go for it. Regret is burdunsome over time.

I was given the next days winning lottery # by Linda Love*.
It won without me playing

04 Dec 20 - 01:58 PM (#4081936)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Around the World in Covid days
Its a little cough and then a sneeze
and then you're on your knees
About the time your fever swells
Its hard to breathe, into your sleeve
and you feel unwell.
Of all the things you've had before
its hard to say if you'll stay or go.
In the last two days you start to fade
with no O2 its got U too
and its time, to say, goodbye.

05 Dec 20 - 09:55 AM (#4082001)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Looking around the house at all of the stuff here. MOM keeps picking up interesting rocks and leaving them on the front edges of the bookshelves. With this much extra weight no wonder the foundation is shifting.

05 Dec 20 - 04:21 PM (#4082056)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Texas foundations often are without basements. We noticed a marble tends to roll west on our floors.

05 Dec 20 - 06:50 PM (#4082077)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Thats ENTERTINMENT
From: Donuel

Anything that happens in life
Can happen in DC
You can make 'em mad
You can make 'em cry
Anything and everything goes
-
(Chorus)
[SCHUMER]
The clown
With his tweets falling down
Or the case
Right before arraignment
Or the man
That the country can't stand
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The lights
On first ladies in tights

[BIDEN]
Or the bride
With a guy on the side

[SCHUMER]
Or the ball
Where she, infects them all

[BIDEN, SCHUMER, AND PELOSI]
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The plot
Could be hot
Simply teeming with porn

[SCHUMER]
A gay
Senator
Who is after his ex

[BIDEN]
It could be Oedipus Rex

[SCHUMER]
Where a teen kills off the Congress
And gun nuts have wronged us.

[NANCY]
The jerk
Who is thrown out of work

[JOE]
By the boss
Who is thrown for a loss

[CHUCK]
By the flirt
Who is doing him dirt

[ALL]
The world is a stage
The stage is DC
Its entertainment!

(instrumental break)

[ALL]
The doubt
While the jury is out
Or the drill
When the judge has his fill
Or the case
For the man in disgrace
That's entertainment!

[NANCY]
The dame
Who is known as the flame

[CHUCK]
Of the king
Of an underworld ring

[CHUCK AND JOE]
He's an ape
Who won't let her escape

[ALL]
That's entertainment!
It might
Be a fight
Like you see on the screen
A gang
Getting banged
For the love of some cash
For some huge party bash
At a spot that really is sweet
And everyone ends in mincemeat.
The gag
Where he's waving the flag
That began
With a crooked con man
Hip hip hooray
The American way!
The world is a stage
The stage in DC
Is entertainment!

05 Dec 20 - 08:10 PM (#4082083)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Ah crap scrap that

edited
Anything that happens in life
Can happen in DC
You can make 'em mad
You can make 'em cry
Anything and everything goes

(Chorus)
[SCHUMER]
The clown
With his tweets falling down
Or the case
of the man in disgrace
Or the scam
That the country can't stand
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The lights
On first ladies in tights

[BIDEN]
Or the bride
With a gal on the side

[SCHUMER]
Or the ball
Where she, infects them all

[BIDEN, SCHUMER, AND PELOSI]
That's entertainment!

[PELOSI]
The plot
Could be hot
Simply teeming with porn

[SCHUMER]
A gay
Senator
Who is after his ex

[BIDEN]
It was John but there never was sex

[SCHUMER]
Where a teen kills off the Congress
And gun nuts have wronged us.

[NANCY]
The jerk
Who is thrown out of work

[JOE]
By the boss
Who is thrown for a loss

[CHUCK]
By the flirt
Who is doing him dirt

[ALL]
The world is a stage
The stage is DC
Its entertainment!

(instrumental break)

[ALL]
The doubt
While the jury is out
Or the drill
When the judge has his fill
Or the case
For the man in disgrace
That's entertainment!

[NANCY]
The whore
Who Donald adored

[CHUCK]
He's the king
Of an underworld ring

[CHUCK AND JOE]
He's an ape
Who tries to escape

[ALL]
That's entertainment!
It might
Be a fight
Like you see on the screen
A gang
Getting banged
For the love of some cash
For a huge party bash
At a spot that is sweet

And everyone ends in mincemeat.

The gag
Where he's waving the flag
That began
With a crooked con man
Hip hip hooray
The American way!
The world is a stage
The stage in DC
Is entertainment!

06 Dec 20 - 11:34 PM (#4082209)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Just dropped in to say, "I still ain't here."

07 Dec 20 - 06:41 AM (#4082227)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Behind the kitchens of Trump hotel restaurants
the dumpsters are fermenting and distilling
a dumpster juice that is rotten but addictive.
Sure it is toxic but artificially sweetened
so the rotten after taste makes people drink more
sweetened dumpster juice to hide the rotten flavor.
Compared to salty Liberal tears dumpster juice
has more appeal among people who don't drink wine.

07 Dec 20 - 09:48 AM (#4082251)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

gnu, shouldn't that read "I still ain't ALL here"?

07 Dec 20 - 01:19 PM (#4082270)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That is an important distinction, though from what I read on Facebook recently there is more "all" than there was a year ago, so it may average out.

07 Dec 20 - 07:07 PM (#4082321)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I am shocked, shocked that I have nothing to say in this establishment

08 Dec 20 - 05:57 PM (#4082506)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Neither does anyone else here, so say it.

08 Dec 20 - 09:36 PM (#4082523)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Now warm with ministerial ire,
Fierce sallied forth our loyal 'Squire,
And on his striding steps attends
His desperate clan of Tory friends.
When sudden met his wrathful eye
A pole ascending through the sky,
Which numerous throngs of whiggish race
Were raising in the market-place.
Not higher school-boy's kites aspire,
Or royal mast, or country spire;
Like spears at Brobdignagian tilting,
Or Satan's walking-staff in Milton.
And on its top, the flag unfurl'd
Waved triumph o'er the gazing world,
Inscribed with inconsistent types
Of Liberty and thirteen stripes.
Beneath, the crowd without delay
The dedication-rites essay,
And gladly pay, in antient fashion,
The ceremonies of libation;
While briskly to each patriot lip
Walks eager round the inspiring flip:
Delicious draught! whose powers inherit
The quintessence of public spirit;
Which whoso tastes, perceives his mind
To nobler politics refined;
Or roused to martial controversy,
As from transforming cups of Circe;
Or warm'd with Homer's nectar'd liquor,
That fill'd the veins of gods with ichor.
At hand for new supplies in store,
The tavern opes its friendly door,
Whence to and fro the waiters run,
Like bucket-men at fires in town.
Then with three shouts that tore the sky,
'Tis consecrate to Liberty.
To guard it from th' attacks of Tories,
A grand Committee cull'd of four is;
Who foremost on the patriot spot,
Had brought the flip, and paid the shot.

By this, M'Fingal with his train
Advanced upon th' adjacent plain,
And full with loyalty possest,
Pour'd forth the zeal, that fired his breast.

"What mad-brain'd rebel gave commission,
To raise this May-pole of sedition?
Like Babel, rear'd by bawling throngs,
With like confusion too of tongues,
To point at heaven and summon down
The thunders of the British crown?
Say, will this paltry Pole secure
Your forfeit heads from Gage's power?
Attack'd by heroes brave and crafty,
Is this to stand your ark of safety;
Or driven by Scottish laird and laddie,
Think ye to rest beneath its shadow?
When bombs, like fiery serpents, fly,
And balls rush hissing through the sky,
Will this vile Pole, devote to freedom,
Save like the Jewish pole in Edom;
Or like the brazen snake of Moses,
Cure your crackt skulls and batter'd noses?

"Ye dupes to every factious rogue
And tavern-prating demagogue,
Whose tongue but rings, with sound more full,
On th' empty drumhead of his scull;
Behold you not what noisy fools
Use you, worse simpletons, for tools?
For Liberty, in your own by-sense,
Is but for crimes a patent license,
To break of law th' Egyptian yoke,
And throw the world in common stock;
Reduce all grievances and ills
To Magna Charta of your wills;
Establish cheats and frauds and nonsense,
Framed to the model of your conscience;
Cry justice down, as out of fashion,
And fix its scale of depreciation;
Defy all creditors to trouble ye,
And keep new years of Jewish jubilee;
Drive judges out, like Aaron's calves,
By jurisdiction of white staves,
And make the bar and bench and steeple
Submit t' our Sovereign Lord, The People;
By plunder rise to power and glory,
And brand all property, as Tory;
Expose all wares to lawful seizures
By mobbers or monopolizers;
Break heads and windows and the peace,
For your own interest and increase;
Dispute and pray and fight and groan
For public good, and mean your own;
Prevent the law by fierce attacks
From quitting scores upon your backs;
Lay your old dread, the gallows, low,
And seize the stocks, your ancient foe,
And turn them to convenient engines
To wreak your patriotic vengeance;
While all, your rights who understand,
Confess them in their owner's hand;
And when by clamours and confusions,
Your freedom's grown a public nuisance,
Cry "Liberty," with powerful yearning,
As he does "Fire!" whose house is burning;
Though he already has much more
Than he can find occasion for.
While every clown, that tills the plains,
Though bankrupt in estate and brains,
By this new light transform'd to traitor,
Forsakes his plough to turn dictator,
Starts an haranguing chief of Whigs,
And drags you by the ears, like pigs.
All bluster, arm'd with factious licence,
New-born at once to politicians.
Each leather-apron'd dunce, grown wise,
Presents his forward face t' advise,
And tatter'd legislators meet,
From every workshop through the street.
His goose the tailor finds new use in,
To patch and turn the Constitution;
The blacksmith comes with sledge and grate
To iron-bind the wheels of state;
The quack forbears his patients' souse,
To purge the Council and the House;
The tinker quits his moulds and doxies,
To cast assembly-men and proxies.

09 Dec 20 - 09:46 AM (#4082597)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell

Hi, Mom!

I'm painting the exterior of my house and have run into a bit of a problem. I have finished the east, west, and south sides, but since it's December, the sun is in the southern sky all day long. The remaining northern side of the house gets no sun at all. The paint is drying very slowly and working there is just a bit on the chilly side.

What I need is a few volunteers to help me turn my house 180° so the north side becomes the south side. Not permanently, but just for a couple of days, and then we'll spin it back. Who's up for lending a hand?

If that sound like too much trouble, we could try reversing the earth's axial tilt for a few days. That would probably work just as well.

09 Dec 20 - 10:39 AM (#4082609)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Try placing a few mirrors - 100 might do it - to reflect back onto that side. The work will warm you.

09 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM (#4082673)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Build a really big fire and wrap lots and lots of aluminum foil behind it, stretched from tree to tree. This will reflect heat from the fire on the cold side, AND you can cook biscuits and cornbread at the same time.

Lasers could also work. Just get a few pointer-lasers and jack up the input to a few thousand watts.

09 Dec 20 - 08:00 PM (#4082683)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Everyone is gravitating to a scientific approach involving E.
The Lord will watch the paint dry. If you used oil it may take more than your lifetime.

10 Dec 20 - 08:41 PM (#4082840)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

MOM! I thought I told you to get up there! Now do it, okay? For me, your favorite kid? Please?

10 Dec 20 - 10:03 PM (#4082848)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

MOM, did you get moved to the head of the line for the COVID-19 vaccination? They're going to set up a booth at the Legion Hovel and your name should be on the list.

11 Dec 20 - 08:06 AM (#4082897)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Idaho did not join the amicus brief to overturn the election of Biden.

NO VACCINE FOR YOU

Texas however has friends in the white house/mara lago so Stilly gets the vaccine.

11 Dec 20 - 08:12 AM (#4082899)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

BWL's Florida also supports overturning the election - Vaccine for you

However without a Covid relief bill
NO SOUP FOR YOU!

11 Dec 20 - 03:28 PM (#4082980)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

While shopping for chess sets there were all kinds; Game of Thrones, The Hobbitt, Haarry Potter, Trump vs Biden(however Biden and Harris are not available but can be purchased seperately).
There were no Dicks vs Assholes chess sets. There should be:
dick 1 |d?k|
noun vulgar slang
1 a man’s penis.
• Brit.a stupid or contemptible person.
2 [ mass noun ] [ with negative ] N. Amer.anything at all.
verbchiefly N. Amer.
1 [ no obj. ] informal waste time; mess around.
2 [ with obj. ] (of a man) have sexual intercourse with.
ORIGIN mid 16th cent. (in the general sense ‘fellow’): pet form of the given name Richard. Sense 1 of the noun dates from the late 18th cent.
Next, from the same dictionary:
asshole
noun vulgar slang
US spelling of arsehole.
arsehole |'??sh??l|
nounBrit. vulgar slang
1 the anus.
2 a stupid, irritating, or contemptible person.
Suppose for a moment that we don’t give a rat’s ass(hole) about the lexical definitions. Suppose… for a moment that you would only want to hear my analysis of these two words.
A ‘dick’ is predominantly used to describe someone who’s actively irritating others with various malicious acts. An ‘asshole’, on the other hand, is passive. Let me elaborate.
For example, you’re shopping for groceries at the supermarket. A ‘dick’ would push his cart into your butt, say sorry, laugh about it, and then cut in line. Hell, he would steal the items from your cart and throw in items that are embarrassing or super expensive.
An asshole, however, would just stand in your way. When asked to move, he would stare at you incessantly, as if he was the owner of the space, and frown.
Thus, being called an ‘asshole’ is still better than being referred to as ‘dick’.
MY CHESS SET
The pawns for ass holes are pretty straight forward. The Castle Assholes are HUGE. The knights are drive a Ferrari, Bishops are 2 of the 4 major religious symbols. The King Asshole and Queen can be custom ordered.
The Dick pawns were small. The Dick rooks were large, the Bishops looked pretty normal but were dicks. The knights wore condoms. The Dick king or queen came in only one version. Rich Dicks and Bitch Dicks.

13 Dec 20 - 08:44 PM (#4083319)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Last night one of the Idaho Legion Fortresses was attacked by the forces of the Galactic Overlord (who is now styling itself as the "Multidimensional Intergalactic Overlord"). As you can see, they used a cloaking device to attack from a direction other than that which the Multifocal Incinerator Beamcaster was pointing. Fortunately it was possible to rapidly swing the 'caster and destroy the attacking fleet. This has led to a lawsuit in the Extreme Court of Mercy charging the Legion with "Unwarranted Ugly Behavior Against the MIO" and asking that time be rolled back and the whole incident redone.

The Legion isn't having any of it and asked that the case be dismissed "With Extreme Prejudice And Then Some."

14 Dec 20 - 06:34 AM (#4083359)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

This weekend 4 people were criticly stabbed at a pro Trump rally in DC.
This did not happen until after the Donald made a show of support by making a Marine one helicopter fly by over the samll gathering .
All the opponents were refered to as anti fascists by the media but the victims were not assigned any viewpoint as to pro or anti trump.

14 Dec 20 - 08:30 PM (#4083483)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Why do those stabbed, or the stabbers, need to be assigned a label? The stabbed are hurt, the stabbers are liable for arrest if they can be found. What does it matter what "side" they were on?

14 Dec 20 - 09:14 PM (#4083492)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I don't know. From an omnicient POV, sides don't matter. To law and order it matters. Reasons are variable. Due to infinities some reasons that probably are held by entities that consider themselves Galactic Overlords would be alien to us. Einstien's equations can end in infinities which clues me into thinking infinities exist. If they exist anything is possible like there is no outer edge to the universe. Time may have an edge and could make black holes inside our universe the only edges where time stops and space time and mass change places with each other. In our observable universe we can see Mass transform into Energy as sunlight everyday. I suppose Energy turns into mass someplace really cold. The transformations inside black holes are probably beyond our comprehension like spacetime and energetic mass transforming into its opposite. It might be a gateway or a new universe...like I said I don't know.

15 Dec 20 - 08:58 AM (#4083562)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mom's Xmas carols
From: Donuel

It started with a glass of beer
sung to the tune it came upon a midnight clear

It started wi-th a glass of beer
the way it so often does
Soon Don had knocked off a pint of rye
and Mom had one helluva buzz
the yelling started round half past nine
and push came to shove around ten
the screams grew loud and the neighbors knew
the mudcats were at it again
Don's eyes were black from the countless blows
Mom's body was bloody and raw
his nose was broken - he'd lost 4 teeth
from stopping a vase with his jaw
they fought each other since god knows when
and neither show any remorse
they stick together because they know
The Church won't allow for divorce.

15 Dec 20 - 09:16 AM (#4083566)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

The fight and the stabbings recently mentioned - those aren't reenactments of a chess game with full-size humans as players, are they? The game is a little more rough than I remember.

15 Dec 20 - 11:32 AM (#4083579)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

local news said aout 40 arrests were made

Rudy the red nose lawyer

Rudy the deadbeat lawyer
loved Donald like his fam-ily
dooming his wife and children
to insolubil-ity

Rudy enjoys the good life
takes a royal princess cruise
makes it with teen age bimbos
Buys the most expensive booze

Then one foggy xmas eve< Rudy got a call
If he'd shoot joe b tonight
Trump would win it all all right -

soon the law was on his trail
Rudy changed his name
had some hair dye and botox
Now he is a star on Fox

the only thing about poor Rudy
he looks exactly like an older Pense
when he reports on Donald
he doesn't make a bit of sense

15 Dec 20 - 09:33 PM (#4083661)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

As my dear old friend Manny Kant said, "Die Logiker sagen mit Recht, daß man beim Gebrauch der Urteile
in Vernunftschlüssen die einzelnen Urteile gleich den allgemeinen
behandeln könne. Denn eben darum, weil sie gar keinen Umfang haben,
kann das Prädikat derselben nicht bloß auf einiges dessen, was unter
dem Begriff des Subjekts enthalten ist, gezogen, von einigem aber
ausgenommen werden. Es gilt also von jenem Begriffe ohne Ausnahme,
gleich als wenn derselbe ein gemeingültiger Begriff wäre, der einen
Umfang hätte, von dessen ganzer Bedeutung das Prädikat gelte.
Vergleichen wir dagegen ein einzelnes Urteil mit einem gemeingültigen,
bloß als Erkenntnis, der Größe nach, so verhält sie sich zu diesem
wie Einheit zur Unendlichkeit, und ist also an sich selbst davon
wesentlich unterschieden. Also, wenn ich ein einzelnes Urteil
(judicium singulare) nicht bloß nach seiner inneren Gültigkeit,
sondern auch, als Erkenntnis überhaupt, nach der Größe, die es
in Vergleichung mit anderen Erkenntnissen hat, schätze, so ist
es allerdings von gemeingültigen Urteilen (judicia communia)
unterschieden, und verdient in einer vollständigen Tafel der Momente
des Denkens überhaupt (obzwar freilich nicht in der bloß auf den
Gebrauch der Urteile untereinander eingeschränkten Logik) eine
besondere Stelle."

15 Dec 20 - 10:12 PM (#4083663)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu

Rap... 15 Dec 20... So, summed up, my reply would be, to quote Cousin Rodney of Kent, "Money talks, and bullshit walks."

15 Dec 20 - 10:15 PM (#4083665)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Good to hear from you, gnu,

and I sincerely hope
that the holiday season for you this year,
in some way or other,
is a more life-affirming experience
than the one you must have endured in 2019,
a year ago at this time.
Keep hanging in there.

15 Dec 20 - 11:22 PM (#4083667)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

It seems I should put this in a music thread, or even start one, but a Google Blob opera machine learning just does sound like a great source of BS, doesn't it?

Let the dulcet tones of Google’s Blob Opera ring in the holiday season with machine learning

16 Dec 20 - 09:54 AM (#4083728)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hark the hearald googles sing!

16 Dec 20 - 01:11 PM (#4083769)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Sounds like some squeezy toys that dogs play with.

16 Dec 20 - 04:21 PM (#4083795)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Rap you were 1,666
The blobs were cute when singing christmas carols.
I couldn't get them to sing my suggestions.

16 Dec 20 - 05:08 PM (#4083805)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

This is 1668. These people die in 1668:

    January 6
       Luis de Benavides Carrillo, Marquis of Caracena (b. 1608)
       Magdalene Sibylle of Saxony, Crown Princess of Denmark (b. 1617)
    January 14 – Arnauld de Oihenart, Basque historian and poet (b. 1592)
    January 31 – Hermann Busenbaum, German Jesuit theologian (b. 1600)
    February 2 – Antonio del Castillo y Saavedra, Spanish artist (b. 1616)
    February 8 – Alessandro Tiarini, Italian painter (b. 1577)
    February 21 – John Thurloe, English Puritan spy (b. 1616)
    March 16 – Francis Talbot, 11th Earl of Shrewsbury (b. 1623)
    April 12 – Alexander Daniell, sole proprietor of the Manor of Alverton, Cornwall (b. 1599)
    April 21 – Jan Boeckhorst, Flemish painter (b. c. 1604)
    May 1 – Frans Luycx, Flemish painter (b. 1604)
    May 8 – Catherine of St. Augustine, French nun and nurse of New France (b. 1632)
    May 9 – Otto Christoph von Sparr, German general (b. 1599)
    May 21 – Christoph Delphicus zu Dohna, Prussian-born Swedish soldier, diplomat (b. 1628)
    June 20 – Heinrich Roth, German Sanskrit scholar (b. 1620)
    July 26 – Hans Svane, Danish statesman (b. 1606)
    August 9 – Jakob Balde, German Latinist (b. 1604)
    August 23 – Artus Quellinus the Elder, Flemish sculptor (b. 1609)
    August 24 – Tyman Oosdorp, Dutch brewer and magistrate of Haarlem (b. 1613)
    September 16
       Paolo Emilio Rondinini, Italian Bishop of Assisi (b. 1617)
       Jan Miense Molenaer, Dutch painter (b. 1610)
    September 19 – Sir William Waller, English Civil War general (b. c. 1635)
    October 12 – Zacharias Wagenaer, secretary, painter, then merchant and administrator (Dutch East-India Company) (b. 1614)
    October 13
       Robert Sutton, 1st Baron Lexinton, English politician (b. 1594)
       Algernon Percy, 10th Earl of Northumberland, English military leader (b. 1602)
    November 17 – Joseph Alleine, English non-conformist preacher (b. 1634)
    November 21 – Adolf William, Duke of Saxe-Eisenach (b. 1632)
    December 3 – William Cecil, 2nd Earl of Salisbury, English earl (b. 1591)
    December 14 – Charles Berkeley, 2nd Viscount Fitzhardinge, English politician (b. 1599)
    December 23 – Martin Bauzer, Gorizian Jesuit priest and writer (b. 1595)
    December 24 – Wadham Wyndham, English judge (b. 1609)

I didn't know any of them. Did you?

16 Dec 20 - 09:06 PM (#4083834)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

What a concept. I would love to know many of them.

17 Dec 20 - 01:10 PM (#4083884)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Here are flags for every Texan known to have died of COVID-19 in 2020 so far. I'd like to have known a few of them. Perhaps I do/did and am not aware yet that they died. :-(

17 Dec 20 - 05:02 PM (#4083918)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Didja ever get a sonogram of yur brain? It is suppose to get you high depending on frequency and short duration. It has something to do with the singing neurons and pyramidal cells which contain your micro
tubuels which can measure wave function collapse on a quantum scale.
Quantum consciousness goes back to Schrodiger's 1932 book What is Life. In the last 10 years the awareness of quantum consciousness has exploded. The ventricals can help islate the quantum and the pyramidal cells in the tmporal lobes can decipher the signals.
The universe operates on a non computational level including time insights that spreads events out. The insights you have goes beyond the rules. Understanding goes beyond computation. Do I understand quantum mechanics role in consciousness, HELL NO, but I love the extra help. How do you think I guessed Trump's twitter password to be maga2020?

17 Dec 20 - 07:14 PM (#4083932)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I watch Bach in a graphic manner as the music is highlighted in color as it moves along.
I realized that Toccata and Fugue was like a fractal with an added dimension of pitch and frequency. An audio fractal may only be doubled in rhythm and added in its simplest form an octave higher.
Add counterpoint lines and the fractal creates yet another dimension.
This would be a different approach to machine learned chorale 4 voice leading Bach. The usual method is by programing examples in the hundreds and have the computer create a new version based on those examples.

18 Dec 20 - 05:49 AM (#4083972)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I have an updated theory of evolution.
Survival of the most joyous and good feelings a species have.

On a quantum level of cillia on a paramecium to a human being's comprable micro tubuels in our pryamidial cells the good feelings of being alive and reproducing are factors in the continuation and groth of life.
The power of orgasm derives all life in the universe.
If it feels good, its alive. This an eastern concept that life is derived from the innate joyous universe and not just organization and computation by accident or pan spermia.

I like thinking of (new to me) ideas because it feels good.
If making quilts feel good and benefits a species it will grow.
If Elon Musk feels good about putting a car in orbit it is an expression of the universe. 8^}

18 Dec 20 - 08:31 PM (#4084086)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My old buddy Fred Schiller wrote this!

Freude schöner Götterfunken, Tochter aus Elysium
Wir betreten feuertrunken himmlische dein Heiligtum
Deine Zauber binden wieder was die Mode streng geteilt
Alle Manschen werden Brüder wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt
Deine Zauber binden wieder was die Mode streng geteilt
Alle Manschen werden Brüder wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt

Wem der große Wurf gelungen eines Freundes Freund zu sein
Wer ein holdes Weib errungen mische seinen Jubel ein
Ja, wer auch nur eine Seele sein nennt auf dem Erdenrund
Und wers nie gekonnt der stehle weinent sich aus diesem bund
Ja, wer auch nur eine Seele sein nennt auf dem Erdenrund
Und wers nie gekonnt der stehle weinent sich aus diesem bund

Freude Freude heißt die Feder in der ewigen Naturfreude Freude treibt die Räder in der großen Weltenuhr
Blumen treibt sie aus dem Keime, Sonnen an das Virmament
Ein dringtsie in Tiefen, die des Sehers Rohr nicht kennt
Blumen treibt sie aus dem Keime, Sonnen an das Virmament
Ein dringtsie in Tiefen, die des Sehers Rohr nicht kennt.

19 Dec 20 - 10:38 AM (#4084141)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

DON'T SWAT YOUR MOTHER
(Brian Hooker & Porter Steele (c) 1919)

Homeward to their mother, two working men did come,
Weary from their honest toil and lighted up with rum.
Supper was not ready. One aimed a brutal blow,
When the blue-eyed baby stopped them, saying, "Brothers, don't do so.

Don't swat your mother, boys, just 'cause she's old!
Don't mop the floor with her face.
Think of her love as a treasure of gold,
Shining through shame and disgrace.

Don't put the rocking chair next to her eye.
Don't bounce the lamp off her bean!
Angels are watching you up in the sky.
Don't swat your mother, boys, it's mean!

19 Dec 20 - 09:26 PM (#4084205)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

In her eyes there's the blue of Killarney
On her cheeks the rose of Kildare
On her lips just a bit of blarney
and the rose of Kildare in her hair
She was cradled and born
on St. Patrick's morn
with a smile on her face so sublime
She's as sweet as the day
She stole Dad's heart away
That old Irish Whisky of mine

20 Dec 20 - 12:14 PM (#4084309)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I like Ode to Joy best.

20 Dec 20 - 02:09 PM (#4084331)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

When Schiller's text is dropped into Google translate (I couldn't work up any sturm und drang during the process, but it still worked), the resulting English column is a lot shorter. The Germans sure use a lot of extra syllables and letters.

Joy, beautiful spark of the gods, Daughter of Elysium
We enter your sanctuary drunk with fire
Your spells bind again what the fashion strictly divided
All people become brothers wherever your gentle wing dwells
Your spells bind again what the fashion strictly divided
All people become brothers wherever your gentle wing dwells

Who succeeded in being a friend's friend
Whoever wins a lovely woman mix in his jubilation
Yes, who even calls to be a soul on the earth
And whoever has never been able to steal their way out of this bond
Yes, who even calls to be a soul on the earth
And whoever has never been able to steal their way out of this bond

Joy Joy is the name of the spring in the eternal joy of nature.
Joy drives the wheels in the great world clock
She drives flowers from the bud, suns to the virmament
It penetrates into depths that the seer's pipe does not know
She drives flowers from the bud, suns to the virmament
It penetrates into depths that the seer's pipe does not know.

20 Dec 20 - 03:49 PM (#4084343)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

rapparee, that "Don't Swat Your Mother" lyric recalls
Brendan Behan's doggerel from his "The Hostage."

There's no place on earth like the world,
There's no place wherever you be,
There's no place on earth like the world,
That's straight up and take it from me.

Never throw stones at your mother,
You'll be sorry for it when she's dead.
Never throw stones at your mother,
Throw bricks at your father instead.

The South and the North Poles are parted,
Perhaps it is all for the best;
Till the H-Bomb will bring them together,
And there we will let matters rest.

20 Dec 20 - 06:23 PM (#4084367)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Hey Rap you may have guessed I think Freud was full of Crap. I'm more of a Carl Jung fan. So I ask if you ever ran into the book 'Corpus Hermeticus'?

It was found after a millenium of being lost by a book scout hired by Lorenzo D'Medichi.

20 Dec 20 - 07:43 PM (#4084379)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Sure. Here's a translation for you. I have the original -- autographed! -- in my own library.

21 Dec 20 - 06:08 AM (#4084421)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Holy Cow. That Hermes signature could be worth a fortune.
Second century science books are all the rage now.
This was a special request from Q-Anon himeself!
The astrology and alchemy chapters have a finders fee I can retire on..

21 Dec 20 - 09:30 AM (#4084443)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

OhNo this is a Monastic forgery with no mention of astrology and alchemy. It is a early Christian attempt at misinformation and fake news. There goes my nest egg.

21 Dec 20 - 04:19 PM (#4084495)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thanks anyway Rap, praise be upon you - long may you reign

Deep in the bowel of the US Capitol the sub basement had a foul draft of sewerage. McConnel was leading incantations from the Egyptian Book of the Dead. Mitch did not know he was reading the Dedication. Except for Romney in a suit all the High Reichical Senators were dressed in hooded cloaks and reverentially repeating everything Mitch said 5 syllables at a time. You could hear a flag pin drop when Mitch stopped.
Mitch slowly squeezed a resounding whoopee cushion and began slowly "Fellow loyal Trumpists... the time has come...the body of Donald Trump has died...but even death doth die...We are here to restore and Transform der Leader into...Dark Trump the Vanquisher! ...long may he reign. Repeat after me "Hushmon Knee con varee"...**** ** ***"tush emon zer schwinfelt"...

A mile away the Lincoln Memorial began to darken and Abe appeared to try and stand...

21 Dec 20 - 05:42 PM (#4084509)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here you are, complete with footnotes.

22 Dec 20 - 04:06 PM (#4084624)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

That makes one helluva coffee table book.
I'd be afraid what it would say about me if people saw it on my table.

The book speaks of an actual journey a pharoh would take down an underground canal to the great pyramid from ~50 metres underneath the ass of the Sphinx.
We don't make rituals like they used to.

22 Dec 20 - 08:15 PM (#4084644)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Well then, here ya go!

23 Dec 20 - 10:30 AM (#4084708)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Good thing I took High School French.

After reading I seem to have swelled with an unholy inspiration;

The tragedy of the commons happens all the time
No food for children is not a despicable crime
But a tragedy of corporations is the worst on Earth
Thank my god Wall Street peaks and isn't cursed

Desolate death, evictions, addictions and pests
are glorious for the unequivical master of lies
Mercy is the power of pardons as sweet revenge crests
The most beautiful music comes from anguish and cries

Killing blacks is even better when its done by slow knee
Calling us racists and Nazis is fake news and simply phony
They say God called upon Donald Trump to cure these times of evil
That is hysterically funny to those who know it's the DEVIL

23 Dec 20 - 02:05 PM (#4084725)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Prove it conclusively by calling Lucifer up and putting him on Fox, etc.

23 Dec 20 - 04:42 PM (#4084740)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Cut to the chase and pick up a copy of Jonathan Edwards' Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God.

“The arrows of death fly unseen at noon-day; the sharpest sight cannot discern them.”

23 Dec 20 - 05:09 PM (#4084754)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There is a Lucifer in the DC phone book. I called him up and put him on hold.

23 Dec 20 - 08:37 PM (#4084785)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

You mean this one?

The God that holds you over the pit of hell, much in the same way as one holds a spider, or some loathsome insect, over the fire, abhors you, and is dreadfully provoked; His wrath towards you burns like fire; he looks upon you as worthy of nothing else but to be cast into the fire; He is of purer eyes than to bear to have you in His sight; you are ten thousand times more abominable in His eyes than the most hateful venomous serpent is in ours. You have offended Him infinitely more than ever a stubborn rebel did his prince; and yet, it is nothing but His hand that holds you from falling into the fire every moment. It is to be ascribed to nothing else, that you did not go to hell the last night; that you were suffered to awake again in this would, after
you closed your eyes to sleep; and there is no other reason to be given, why you have not dropped into hell since you arouse in the morning, but that God's hand has held you up. There is no other reason to be given, but His mercy; yea, no other reason can be given why you do not this very moment drop down into hell.

O sinner, consider the fearful danger you are in! It is a great furnace of wrath, a wide and bottomless pit, full of the fire if the wrath that you are held over in the hand of that God whose wrath is provoked and incensed as much against you as against many of the damned in hell. You hang by a slender thread, with the flames of divine wrath flashing about it and ready every moment to singe it, and burn it asunder; and you have no interest in any Mediator, and nothing
to lay hold of to save yourself, nothing to keep off the flames of wrath, nothing of your own, nothing that you have done, nothing that you can do, to induce God to spare you one moment. And consider here more particularly.

23 Dec 20 - 08:58 PM (#4084789)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

If I had to guess that sounds like the invocation ceremony for admission to Bob Jones University.

23 Dec 20 - 09:26 PM (#4084792)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Funny thing is, Edwards really liked spiders. He did some naturalist work following them around.

24 Dec 20 - 02:18 PM (#4084866)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

He also wrote, changing a much earlier quote from the days of early Christianity, "The floor of Hell is paved with the skulls of unbaptized children" even though he supported infant baptism. FYI, the original quote is "the floor of Hell is paved with the skulls of bishops."

24 Dec 20 - 03:50 PM (#4084888)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

The skulls of bishops, eh?
How Covenanter of him ...

24 Dec 20 - 09:42 PM (#4084924)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

"...and the path with the bones of priests."

Merry Christmas, Mom.

24 Dec 20 - 11:11 PM (#4084931)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Poking around the streaming offerings, can't go wrong with A Christmas Story. Have a good xmas, everyone!

a tapestry of obscenity

getting ready for school was like getting ready for deep sea diving

25 Dec 20 - 07:37 PM (#4084986)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mom MOAB! You get back up where you can wish everyone a Merry Christmas (or whatever their choice is) and OUT of that gutter RIGHT NOW! Is that a bottle of hair tonic you're drinking? Heavens to Betsy, you'll make yourself sick yet! Here, drink this Courvoisier VSOP!

25 Dec 20 - 10:17 PM (#4085015)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Obscenities are still floating above Lake Erie .
The ephemeral virtual violent quality of social media includes wishing everyone a merry Christmas and having some joker issueing a death threat against those Christian Kwanza haters or 'extreme' bhuddists declaring a fatwa against the 2,000 page snooze pill called the bible.
Of course the King James beta version 2.4 of the 'bile bull' is the real one and not that 1st Jewish version. But re-legends aside there are greater arguments we can pretend to have. Anything to make the life of a moderator ulceriffic. (Facebook aside) FB somehow makes money on nazi forums discussing the real reasons for safely blowing up Nashville with a broken down motor home for the facist cause not be confused with fact-cious causes.
As long as America can safely dream of sugar plum masked singers and dancers and pimple poppers.
Old Mister Potter sleeps tonight with happy revenge of NO Covid, unemployment insurance, or food bank relief. The lying sleeps tonight, in the jungle the mighty jungle....

26 Dec 20 - 11:12 AM (#4085067)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

That odd blast in Nashville, a white recreational vehicle driving down the street broadcasting to vacate the area - then BOOM! - that should be the singular story of the weekend, you'd think. But the toxic BS being served up (now from Florida) puts it all into the shadows. It really is difficult to top some of that. I am waiting for the justice system to try to stuff that evil genie back into a courtroom-shaped bottle (followed by a prison cell shaped bottle, better than an ankle bracelet on the golf course bottle).

I'm gonna go make cinnamon rolls. You'll know by the smell when they're ready and can come get a couple each. Who wants icing on top?

26 Dec 20 - 12:50 PM (#4085076)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Cinnamon rolls washed down with prison wine sounds fine.

26 Dec 20 - 02:29 PM (#4085078)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Prison wine?
Is that the kind that they cultivate using toothpaste and stuff?

26 Dec 20 - 03:41 PM (#4085084)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Hair tonic and iodine, in Mr. Roberts.

26 Dec 20 - 09:42 PM (#4085108)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

A largish black plastic trash bag. In that put as much fruit cocktail and other canned fruit stuff as you can swipe from the mess hall. Throw in a few slices of bread for yeast and as much sugar as you can swipe. Put it all under your bunk for a few days to ferment. Take it out and drink at your leisure, but watch the odor and the guards!

27 Dec 20 - 03:12 PM (#4085213)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Thats the one. You forgot its ususally brewed in the toilet for concealment.

I got a hand made quilt for xmas. It has a border of a full philharmonic orchestra with all the different instrument players but since it repeats it is a 3,000 member orchestra. The middle panel has a full size cello scroll, cellos,a strad,concert piano, music manuscript and more. The other side has concert harps, violins, violas and string bass.

28 Dec 20 - 08:43 AM (#4085309)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

There is an editorial called the 19th in the New Yorker that sums up my opinion of Covid 19 management in the US.

28 Dec 20 - 11:13 AM (#4085322)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

"To the living we owe respect, to the dead we owe the truth".
Voltaire

He got it wrong, the truth is wasted on the dead.

28 Dec 20 - 08:36 PM (#4085420)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Unless you're the one being lied about, and then, well, George Washington couldn't tell a lie and became the Father of His Country. Of course, that was a lie about him, and we owe it to him to tell the Truth about him. He wasn't the "Father of His Country", he had no biological children of his own (although he did adopt two from Martha's previous marriage). Unlike some Presidents (e.g., Warren Harding, FDR) he didn't keep a mistress in DC during his Presidency.

29 Dec 20 - 06:40 AM (#4085460)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

We tend to print all of the legends and lies and ignore the ugly truth.
The truth of our beauty is brief and the lifetime of lies is long.
The truth need not demand incontravertible proof.
Nor are all lies necessarily wrong.
It is because we are all mortal
That time is a locked portal.

see what i did there?

29 Dec 20 - 11:29 AM (#4085507)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Countdown to the most important date in our near future: the 46th president.

29 Dec 20 - 12:06 PM (#4085515)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

2 million seconds...whimper

29 Dec 20 - 08:48 PM (#4085598)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Important Date? Nonsense! My birthday isn't for 44 days yet!

30 Dec 20 - 06:38 AM (#4085650)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

All the world is a mothered BS thread and all the players upon the stage have fault within themselves. The fault is from the stars in violent gamma ray Nova storms. From chaos the threads of life in the most violent regions, must reproduce ferociously and often. Where calm, near imortality may reign. To burn twice as bright and hot or cool and still is the ancient response of life. We can not choose our region of birth. Feel fortunate if it is Earth.

cosmic pond

30 Dec 20 - 12:48 PM (#4085709)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Nonsense! I decide upon Life, the Universe, and Everything! And for your information, the last two digits of pi are (in decimal notation as used on Terra) 42.

30 Dec 20 - 01:01 PM (#4085715)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I always suspected it was an even number. Peace is restored. This is not one of those odd cosmos afterall, you know, one with an odd god.

There is news, just now, that they are going to close the restaurant at the end of the universe.

30 Dec 20 - 06:37 PM (#4085743)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

No, but masks are required and so is social distancing. In this case, six parsecs.

01 Jan 21 - 07:25 PM (#4086083)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Now it's only 1,615,068 seconds. And it's 2021. And Trump is pissed about so many things here's hoping he blows an aneurism soon and puts us out of our misery earlier. Different idiot in the Oval Office for a couple of weeks, but soon . . . very soon . . . Trump will face the courts for all of his dirty dealing for years. The floor show of 2021 will begin (though it will waste time and distract from important business, so we need to ration the amount of time we spend watching that dog and pony show.)

02 Jan 21 - 10:50 AM (#4086153)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

To have a vaccinated population we have to inoculate about a million people per day to be ready for NEXT Fall.

We are not even close because there is no national response to pandemic issues. It is left to the states and hospitals which are already overstretched with too many victims to respond to.

Operation 'Warp Speed' is delayed by the Trump adminisration who still have the parking brake on and can't move.

Human error, waste and theft are a given but this problem was ignored from the beggining.

How many are we vaccinating per day? I decline to be the bearer of this bad news.

02 Jan 21 - 09:26 PM (#4086197)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

It is estimated that we'll get ours in (roughly) mid-February. Of course, there are fewer people in Idaho that in Howard or Montgomery Counties, Maryland. There are NOT fewer nut jobs, they're just better camouflaged back East.

03 Jan 21 - 10:47 AM (#4086260)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

In the vaccination race Isreal is in the lead with 13% done and the US is just over 1%

Arkansas Has 20,000 doses but they lost the directions and no on was listening when it was explained.

03 Jan 21 - 01:03 PM (#4086279)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

Rapparee has a valid point.
Idaho has become notorious for the, er, "eccentric" people.
But he's right --
in other places camouflage and concealment is the way to go,
but Idaho's reputation is that
the Armageddon freaks can let their freak flag fly free out there.

03 Jan 21 - 02:51 PM (#4086300)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of nAll BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Old man Potter wanted to eat the tiny Baily Savings and Loan
Old man Walgreen devoured Rexall and Rite Aid it's told
Old man Sam ate Mom's and Pop's by the truckload
Now Wall mart-green will dispense vaccine
that got too warm and is way too old.
There's another hunger of the poor and cold
They've been down so long they wish death upon everyone
Armageddonist vs anti armeggeddonist is the civil war to come
Race wanrs and Face wars have police on the run
Amid disease we forgot about having fun
I didn't notice the poet write his very last one.
Or the homeless eat the last palm oil nutrition free crumb.
The wealthy have their island and can still luxuriate in the sun

03 Jan 21 - 04:41 PM (#4086316)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

edit

Old man Potter wanted to eat the tiny Baily Savings and Loan
Old man Walgreen devoured Rexall and Rite Aid it's told
Old man Sam ate Mom's and Pop's by the truckload
Now Wall mart-green will dispense vaccine
that got too warm and is way too old.
There's another hunger of the poor and cold
They've been down so long they wish death on everyone
Armageddonist vs anti armeggeddonist is the civil war to come
Race wars and Face wars have police on the run
Amid disease some forgot to have fun
I didn't notice the poet write his very last one.
Or the homeless eat the last palm oil nutrition free crumb.
The wealthy have their secret supply and can luxuriate in the sun
Only the newly dead are perfectly mum all except for a hiss
Earth has its revenge as thriving life is kissed
DNA has a trick to again and again
take the ultimate risk
that a mutation is
an adaptation

03 Jan 21 - 08:21 PM (#4086348)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

My Mother’s Rosary

It takes an old-time love song
To keep this old world young
Each heart must have a love song
Tho’ some are never sung
Some people worship money
The song of clinking gold
But mother’s song at twilight
Brings you right back to the fold

Chorus:
There’s an old-time melody, I heard long ago
Mother called it the Rosary
She sang it soft and low
Without any rhyme, without any prose
I even forget how the melody goes
But then baby fingers and ten baby toes
She’d watch them by the setting sun
And when her daily work was done
She’d count them each and every one
That was “My Mother’s Rosary”

One day we may be happy
Next day we may regret
Some things that we remember
We wish we could forget
Sometimes you may be lonely
In darkness you may roam
But mother’s song at twilight
Keeps telling you to go home.

04 Jan 21 - 12:42 PM (#4086441)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

I had a dear old mother,
And dearly she loved me
And when I was in trouble,
She took me on her knee.

One night as I lay sleeping,
Alone upon my bed
An angel came and whispered
And told me she was dead.

Next morning when I woke up
I found the words were true
My mother was in heaven
Above the sky so blue.

So obey your mother children
No matter big or small
For when you lose your mother
You lose the best of all...

04 Jan 21 - 12:43 PM (#4086442)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

"That Silver Haired Daddy Of Mine"

In a vine covered shack in the mountains
Bravely fighting the battle of time
There's a dear one who's weathered life's sorrow
It's that silver haired daddy of mine

If I could recall all the heartaches
Dear old Daddy, I've caused you to bear
If I could erase those lines from your face
And bring back the gold to your hair

If God would but grant me the power
Just to turn back the pages of time
I'd give all I own if I could but atone
To that silver haired daddy of mine.

I know it's too late, dear old daddy
To repay for the heartaches and care
But dear mother is waiting in heaven
Just to comfort and solace you there

If I could recall all the heartaches
Dear old daddy, I've caused you to bear
If I could erase those lines from your face
And bring back the gold to your hair

If God would but grant me the power
Just to turn back the pages of time
I'd give all I own if I could but atone
To that silver haired daddy of mine...

04 Jan 21 - 01:53 PM (#4086448)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Pages can turn backwards in time but 'you' can't.

Antimatter is in every precise meaningful sense matter moving backward in time. The notion of "moving backward in time" is nonsensical in a Hamiltonian formulation, because the whole description can only go forward in time. That's the definition of what the Hamiltonian does--- it takes you forward in time a little bit. So if you formulate quantum mechanics the Hamiltonian way, this idea is difficult to understand (still it can be done--- Stueckelberg discovered this connection before the path integral, when field Hamiltonians were the only tool).

But in Feynman's particle path-integral picture, when you parametrize particles by their worldline proper time, and you renounce a global causal picture in favor of particles splitting and joining, the particle trajectories are consistent with relativity, but only if the trajectories include back-in-time trajectories, where coordinate time ticks in the opposite sense to proper time.

Looked at in the Hamiltonian formalism, the coordinate time is the only notion of time. So those paths where the proper time ticks in the reverse direction look like a different type of particle, and these are the antiparticles.

Sometimes there is an identification, so that a particle is its own antiparticle.

Precise consequence: CPT theorem
The "C" operator changes all particles to antiparticles, the P operator reflects all spatial directions, and the T operator reflects all motions (and does so by doing complex conjugation). It is important to understand that T is an operator on physical states, it does not abstractly flip time, it concretely flips all momenta and angular momenta (a spinning disk is spinning the other way), so that things are going backwards. The parity operator flips all directions, but not angular momenta.

The CPT theorem says that any process involving matter happens exactly the same when done in reverse motion, in a mirror, to antimatter.

The CPT operator is never the identity, aside from the case of a real scalar field. CPT acting on an electron produces a positron state, for example. CPT acting on a photon produces a photon going in the same direction with opposite polarization (if P is chosen to reflect all spatial coordinate axes, this is a bad convention outside of 3+1 dimensions).

This theorem is proved by noting that a CPT operator corresponds to a rotation by 180 degrees in the Euclidean theory, as described on Wikipedia.

Precise consequence: crossing
Any amplitude involving particles A(k_1,k_2,...,k_n) is analytic in the incoming and outgoing momenta, aside from pole and cut singularities caused by producing intermediate states. In tree-level perturbation theory, these amplitudes are analytic except when creating physical particles, where you find poles. So the scattering amplitudes make sense for any complex value of the momenta, since going around poles is not a problem.

In terms of mandelstam variables for 2-2 scattering, s,t,u (s is the CM energy, t is the momentum transfer and u the other momentum transfer, to the other created particle), the amplitude is an analytic function of s and t. The regions where the particles are on the mass shell are given by mandelstam plot, and there are three different regions, corresponding to A+B goes to C+D , Cbar + B goes to Abar+ D, and A + Dbar goes to C+Bbar. These three regimes are described by the exact same function of s,t,u, in three disconnected regions.

In starker terms, if you start with pure particle scattering, and analyticaly continue the amplitudes with particles with incoming momentum k's (with positive energy) to negative k's, you find the amplitude for the antiparticle process. The antiparticle amplitude is uniquely determined by the analytic contination of the particle amplitude for the energy-momentum reversed.

This corresponds to taking the outgoing particle with positive energy and momentum, and flipping the energy and momentum to negative values, so that it goes out the other way with negative energy. If you identify the lines in Feynman diagrams with particle trajectories, this region of the amplitude gives the contribution of paths that go back in time.

So crossing is the other precise statement of "Antimatter is matter going back in time".

Causal pictures
The notion of going back in time is acausal, meaning it is excluded automatically in a Hamiltonian formulation. For this reason, it took a long time for this approach to be appreciated and accepted. Stueckelberg proposed this interpretation of antiparticles in the late 1930s, but Feynman's presentation made it stick.

In Feynman diagrams, the future is not determined from the past by stepping forward timestep by timestep, it is determined by tracing particle paths proper-time by proper-time. The diagram formalism therefore is philosophically very different from the Hamiltonian field theory formalism, so much so Feynman was somewhat disappointed that they were equivalent.

They are not as easily equivalent when you go to string theory, because string theory is an S-matrix theory formulated entirely in Feynman language, not in Hamiltonian language. The Hamiltonian formulation of strings requires a special slicing of space time, and even then, it is less clear and elegant than the Feynman formulation, which is just as acausal and strange. The strings backtrack in time just like particles do, since they reproduce point particles at infinite tension.

If you philosophically dislike acausal formalisms, you can say (in field theory) that the Hamiltonian formalism is fundamental, and that you believe in crossing and CPT, and then you don't have to talk about going back in time. Since crossing and CPT are the precise manifestations of the statement that antimatter is matter going back in time, you really aren't saying anything different, except philosophically. But the philosophy motivates crossing and CPT.

There is a maximum speed limit for causality and that sis the speed of light which is what the speed o ligh actually is. Jus sayin...

04 Jan 21 - 04:44 PM (#4086477)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I just want to know why the transformation of maximally entangled states under the action of Lorentz transformations in a fully relativistic setting can not be used as FTL messeging when entanglement is optimal? By explicit calculation of the Wigner rotation, we can describe the relativistic analog of the Bell states as viewed from two inertial frames moving with constant velocity with respect to each other. Though the finite dimensional matrices describing the Lorentz transformations are non-unitary, each single particle state of the entangled pair undergoes an effective, momentum dependent, local unitary rotation, thereby preserving the entanglement fidelity of the bipartite state. The details of how these unitary transformations are manifested are explicitly worked out for the Bell states comprised of massive spin 1/2 particles and massless photon polarizations.

SETI might be barking up the wrong cosmic tree with the eletrodynamic spectrum of radio waves when entangled receivers are at work and can never be hacked or deciphered.

Well I kinda know why FTL entanglement communication doesn't work but the answer still pisses me off. Whadu I hafta do, use neutrinos instead of electrons.....EUREKA

04 Jan 21 - 07:41 PM (#4086516)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One more impossible thing.

In my thirties I found myself beneath a Bodhi tree meditating.
I was inside a complicated life thinking simple thoughts.
Now in my den I am in a simple life thinking complicated thoughts.
Between conscious innerspace and cosmic space I forsee a changed Earthly society despite the reptillian ignorance of the liars. By their camoflage you will see them. By their lies you will know them.

This winter beside a stair step stream, an icicle from an over hanging branch traced a wide spiral dripping as it grew like a spring. It is a mystery to me like myself. Why is it here, how did it form? The small mystery humbled my complicated questions. There has to be an explanation. There is only one explanation. Its just one more impossible thing I've seen in my life. One of them is you.

04 Jan 21 - 09:34 PM (#4086536)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

There was a young fellow named Fisk
Whose fencing was exceedingly brisk.
So fast was his action
The Fitzgerald contraction
Turned his epee to a disk

06 Jan 21 - 08:34 PM (#4086823)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Mother MOAB! You get yourself up where you belong, and don't give me any of your sass!

06 Jan 21 - 11:20 PM (#4086840)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

uk version

There was a young fellow named Buck
Whose thing was exceedingly Fucked.
So fast was his action
The Fitzgerald contraction
made his pepee almost get stuck

06 Jan 21 - 11:25 PM (#4086841)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

trump theme
"killing me softly, with his saw"

07 Jan 21 - 08:46 AM (#4086878)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Here is an action photo of the Idaho Legion's nifty keen Backatcha Mechanism in action! When the GO's forces attacked yesterday and tried to Destructoray Washingon, DC the Legion's Space Corps sprung into action, launched the new Mark XXXIV Scout ship, and reflected the Destructoray back at the Galactic Overlord's Super Cruiser. The day was saved!

07 Jan 21 - 09:34 AM (#4086881)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Horatio the fault is in ourselves not the galactic overlords.

07 Jan 21 - 12:52 PM (#4086920)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The backatcha reflecto metal made of nickel tungston selenium and propriatory elements delivers inertia back at 90%
Its unique double punch some say defies conservation of energy.

When Ford made a pick up truck with a backatcha unibody it totaled Toyota, Dodge and Chevy Trucks while it sustained only broken headlights.

08 Jan 21 - 07:04 AM (#4087028)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

One of two Space X's Dragon cargo ships were docked with theISSalong with with three Sovus space craft early this year. To make room for another cargo ship they brought one home.One isway back the astronauts heard an impact behind them. Finding no apparent damage they continued to proceed through the atmospere. A difficulty trimming the ship in the lower entry orbit caused only a momentary concern.

Back on Earth a diagnostic was done and it was discovered part of the main engine exhaust cone was dented and feeder pipes had a residue and damage apparent. After 2 days it was determined that at least 22 kilos of frozen poop from the ISS had impacted the rear of the ship.

Missions in the future will take these discharges into account to safely have emmission orbits decay and burn up in the atmoshere.

08 Jan 21 - 11:57 AM (#4087066)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

dark matter black holes?
well its my guess anyway

08 Jan 21 - 12:33 PM (#4087073)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

5 in a row is a record.

Betelgeuse farted! toward bottom of page

10 Jan 21 - 07:44 PM (#4087437)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I think the political miasma has sucked all of the normal BS energy out of the atmosphere. We'll just bid our time till the Trump methane cloud gets hit by a spark. Be prepared to duck when that happens.

10 Jan 21 - 08:30 PM (#4087441)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

He can always check in to the NYCFTTS.

11 Jan 21 - 12:55 PM (#4087519)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I couldn't remember what NYCFTTS stood for and when I Googled it the top result were a bunch of Mudcat threads. :-/

11 Jan 21 - 02:03 PM (#4087527)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

I found a number of diamonds beneath the ping pong table where people had hit their rings on the edge while playing and dislodged their setting. The true gem is far beneath.

12 Jan 21 - 05:38 PM (#4087664)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu

The important thing is that
Rapparee is still checking in,
so that ultrasound ordeal must be hopefully past.

12 Jan 21 - 06:56 PM (#4087670)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

The average fundamental vibration of the universe is a very deep B flat and the averaged visible light spectrum of the universe is beige.

With different alien senses it would probably be a different color.

12 Jan 21 - 09:06 PM (#4087688)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

The doppler ultrasound showed good blood flow in the carotid arteries (both right and left). They said I can do whatever I feel up doing, within reason. My speech, especially with S-sounds, remains a trifle problematic but I have a speech therapist and we're working on it. Saying something like, "Sue sold Susie a slew of slaw" would be come out as, "Shoe shold Shushie a shlew of shlaw" -- or at least that's what I hear and others say my speech is fine. That is why I'm not speaking at the Inauguration next week.

13 Jan 21 - 09:08 PM (#4087839)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

C₂H₆O.

14 Jan 21 - 10:58 AM (#4087915)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

It was time for Shane's audition. Sirely he was nervous, but this was his shot at becoming famous. He was a talented musician and singer. The audition was his chance to play at a well known nightclub Shooting Star in Los Angeles.

His wish was to produce his own album, but he needed this job to help him make the money to do it. Shane's type of music was unique. His music was a combination of pop and hip-hop music with an Irish twist. He had been born in Ireland and his family moved to the United States when he was very young.

Shane had practiced for many hours for his audition. He had polished and perfected the shitty songs he would play for the nightclub owners.

He stood in front of the owners with his guitar in hand. He began to play. His songs were shaping up nicely and the owners seemed to like it. Everything was going smoothly, when all of a sudden...Crash! A shower of glass flew past him.

A large stage light had fallen and shattered on the stage he was auditioning on. For most people this would have been a huge shining distraction, but this was Shane's moment to shine. He kept playing and didn't miss a beat.

After finishing his songs, the owners gave him a standing ovation.
Even drunk patrons gave him a shtanding ovation. They loved Shane's songs so much, they thought he planned for the light to crash during his song. Shane assured them that he had not planned it.

The owners offered him the job. "Yes!" Shane said. He started that Saturday and couldn't wait to shine at the Shooting Shtar club.

14 Jan 21 - 06:04 PM (#4087991)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Was this Shane McBride of Blind River, Ontario??

14 Jan 21 - 06:45 PM (#4087999)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Yep the pandemic and bar closures cleaned him up real good.

15 Jan 21 - 06:01 PM (#4088191)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

I see your C₂H₆O and raise my single malt Scotch in salute (though lately I've switched to a nice 12-year-old blended Scotch that's pretty good).

15 Jan 21 - 08:38 PM (#4088213)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

Is Sparkling Pineapple wine any good?

15 Jan 21 - 09:12 PM (#4088216)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Only if it's brewed in the toilet.

16 Jan 21 - 09:46 AM (#4088276)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel

C11H15NO2 + (1 hour later) C12H16N2 - any monoamine inhibitors = cure for trump syndrome

16 Jan 21 - 09:31 PM (#4088373)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Welcome, Noodles. I'm in Pocatello,ID. You have found the Annex to MOAB -- not Utah's MOAB, but the Mother Of All BS threads. Perhaps Stilly (our very own moderator) can make you a link to the original MOAB -- something better than 50,000 posts. Stilly has deep roots in the Seattle scene, even though now she lives in Texas.

17 Jan 21 - 01:04 PM (#4088445)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage

Noodles put his introduction in the wrong thread - I'm going to find a better place to move it so more people will see it. Rap was correct. :)

17 Jan 21 - 05:04 PM (#4088484)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee

Of COURSE he was correct! Are you implying I could possibly make an error?

17 Jan 21 - 06:59 PM (#4088502)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: noodles_incident

Whoops! Thanks for sorting that out, Stilly :)

18 Jan 21 - 08:02 PM (#4088689)
Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS year in review
From: Donuel

If, however, you wish, for some sick reason, to re-experience 2020, now is the time to put on your face mask, douse your entire body with hand sanitizer and then — to be safe — don a hazmat suit, as we look back at the unrelenting insanity of this hideous year, starting with…

January
…which begins with all of Washington, as well as parts of Virginia and Maryland, gripped by the gripping historic drama of the impeachment of Donald Trump. Remember that? How gripped we were?

To set the stage: Back in mid-December, the House of Representatives passed two articles of impeachment, after which Speaker Nancy Pelosi, in accordance with the U.S. Constitution, handed out souvenir signing pens. Everyone expected that Pelosi would then send the articles to the Senate.

But as of early January the Senate has not received them. People are wondering if Pelosi, what with her various official duties and hairdresser appointments, simply forgot to send the articles. Or maybe she tried to send them, but because of a bureaucratic snafu they wound up at a different federal entity, such as the Coast Guard.

Eventually, however, the articles arrive at the Senate, where Majority Leader Mitch “The Undertaker” McConnell promises that the impeachment issue will receive full and fair consideration.

He is of course joking, but this is not obvious, because even when Mitch is in a jovial mood he looks like a man passing a kidney stone the size of the Hope Diamond.

Meanwhile in other political news, all eyes are on Iowa as it prepares for the caucuses, which are closely scrutinized because they are the first opportunity for a tiny group of unrepresentative voters to engage in an incomprehensible and deeply flawed process by which they anoint presidential candidates who traditionally go on to fail.

This year, in an effort to modernize the caucuses, the Iowa Democratic Party has upgraded from its old-fashioned manual reporting procedures to a modern, state-of-the-art “app” based on the same software used in the Boeing 737 MAX airliner.

In international news, the big story is a U.S. targeted drone strike, ordered by Trump, which kills Iranian military leader Qasem Soleimani, thereby triggering World War III and forcing the U.S. to reinstate the military draft, at least on Twitter. Iran responds — this is a good indicator of what kind of year it will be — by shooting down a Ukrainian airliner.

Elsewhere abroad, Chinese news media report that a man in a city named “Wuhan” died of a mysterious new virus. This is not considered a big deal in the U.S., since it has nothing to do with either impeachment or the Iowa caucuses.

A much bigger international story concerns Prince Harry and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, who announce via Instagram that they are sick and tired of being part of the British royal family and want to just be regular normal everyday hardworking folks making millions of dollars solely because one of them was born into, and the other one married into, the British royal family.

This plunges Great Britain into a crisis the likes of which it has not been plunged into since “Brexit.” The crisis finally ends when, after a royal summit meeting with Queen Elizabeth II described by participants as “frank and heartfelt,” Harry and Meghan are beheaded.

In sports, Major League Baseball is rocked by scandal with the release of a report concluding that the Houston Astros engaged in an elaborate multi-year cheating scheme, which critics charge enabled the team to win the 2017 World Series as well as six congressional seats in the 2018 midterm elections.

By way of punishment, the league — sending a clear message to future would-be cheaters — rules that all players involved in the scheme will continue to play baseball in exchange for enormous amounts of money.

Speaking of scandal, in…

February
Washington and its immediate suburbs remain gripped by the U.S. Senate’s historic impeachment trial of President Trump, with Democratic prosecutors arguing that Trump illegally pressured Ukrainian leaders to benefit himself politically, while the Republican defense team, employing an alibi strategy, claims that Trump was playing golf at the time.

Under the watchful eye of Chief Justice John Roberts, who is kept from nodding off by a law clerk armed with a pellet gun, everyone, in accordance with Senate rules, repeats everything 127 times, after which the Republican majority, to the surprise of anyone who has the IQ of sponge cake, acquits the Republican president. Washington and its suburbs immediately start looking around for a new historic thing to be gripped by.

In the midst of the impeachment drama, Trump delivers the State of the Union address, an awkward affair that begins with Speaker Pelosi refusing to use the traditional “high privilege and distinct honor” introduction; then Trump refusing to shake Pelosi’s hand; then Pelosi tearing up her copy of Trump’s speech; then Trump hocking a loogie onto Pelosi’s suede pumps.

OK, the loogie part did not happen. As far as we know.

In other political news, Iowa Democratic Party officials sense that there may be a problem with their new “app” when it declares that the winner of the state’s caucuses, with 43 million delegates, is Walter Mondale, followed by the Houston Astros (who also win the Super Bowl). This fiasco does not sit well with the other Democratic candidates, who realize they have wasted an entire year trudging around Iowa eating fried objects on sticks and pretending to care about Iowans.

Things go more smoothly for the Democrats in the New Hampshire primary and Nevada caucuses, with Bernie Sanders emerging as the clear front-runner, which only seems to make him angrier.

A new challenger emerges in the form of charisma-impaired billionaire Mike “Mike” Bloomberg, who uses his personal fortune to hire a vast army of consultants to supply him with a powerful arsenal of focus-group-tested policies, retorts, memes, jokes and humanoid personality traits. Nevertheless he struggles in the debates, the low point coming when Elizabeth Warren, during a heated exchange about non-disclosure agreements, pulls the waistband of Bloomberg’s underpants over the top of his head, a debate tactic known as the “atomic wedgie,” first performed by Lincoln on Douglas in 1858.

Despite all these exciting political developments, the number one concern of the American public, based on the amount of passionate debate it generates on the internet, is the burning issue of whether it is, or is not, OK to recline your airplane seat.

Remember? Those were good times.

As February draws to a close, 2020 seems to be shaping up as a typical election year, in which the political-media complex is repeatedly engulfed by raging apocalyptic dramas that the regular human public pretty much ignores.

And then, unfortunately, comes…

Marpril
…which starts off calmly enough, as the Democratic Party, desperate to find an alternative to 132-year-old white guy Bernie Sanders, settles on 132-year-old white guy Joe Biden, who cruises to a series of primary victories after replacing “No Malarkey” with a bold new campaign slogan: “Somewhat Alert At Times.”

Biden is endorsed by most of his Democratic opponents, including “Mike” Bloomberg, who spent more than $500 million on his campaign, which seems like a lot of money until you consider that he won the American Samoa Caucus, narrowly edging out Tulsi Gabbard, who spent $13.50.

And then, sprinkled in amid all the political coverage, we begin to see reports that this coronavirus thing might be worse than we have been led to believe, although at first the authorities still seem to be saying that it’s basically the flu and there is no reason to panic.

But all of a sudden there seems to be no hand sanitizer for sale anywhere, which makes some sense although there is also no toilet paper, as if people are planning to be pooping for weeks on end (ha) and then we learn that Tom Hanks — Tom Hanks! — has the virus and now they’re saying it’s a lot worse than the flu and we need to wash our hands and not touch our faces and maintain a social distance of six feet and use an abundance of caution to flatten the curve (whatever “the curve” is) but they’re also saying we don’t need face masks no scratch that now they’re saying we DO need face masks but nobody HAS any face masks but hey here’s a funny meme about toilet paper but ohmigod look at these statistical disease models WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE but Trump says maybe this hydroxysomething medicine will work no it won’t work yes it will work no it won’t and now they’re saying there won’t be enough ventilators or hospital beds or PPE and Dr. Fauci and Dr. Birx are saying everybody has to shelter at home or else WE ARE ALL DEFINITELY GOING TO DIE hey here’s another funny toilet-paper meme but seriously what is PPE and is that different from PPP and where will we get the ventilators and there won’t be enough hospital beds and there is still no hand sanitizer and I keep touching my face and they just canceled the NBA can they even DO that wait now they canceled ALL the sports and closed all the schools the colleges the stores the restaurants the bars the theaters the hair salons the parks the Atlantic and Pacific oceans and now they’re saying we need to stay at home for HOW LONG what about the toilet paper I can’t stop touching my damn face are you seriously telling me all this is because somebody ate a freaking bat maybe Amazon has toilet paper ohmigod they’re sold out too WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THE TOILET PAPER not another Zoom meeting I am so tired of shouting at people in little boxes maybe I should take a shower but what’s the point hey here’s a bunch more funny memes ohmigod look at the Stock Market the price of oil maybe I’ll just take a peek at my 401k oh NOOOOOOOO and WHAT ARE PEOPLE DOING WITH ALL THIS TOILET PAPER and how long do we have to keep being abundantly cautious what did Trump say about the ventilators and what did Dr. Birx and Dr. Fauci say about what Trump said about the ventilators and what did Trump say about what they said about what he said about the ventilators ventilators ventilators LOOK AT THESE MODELS WE ARE STILL GOING TO DIE but do we really want to go on living in a world where there’s no toilet paper and every single TV commercial sounds like “as we navigate these difficult times together, the National Association of Folding Chair Manufacturers wants you to know that we are committed to running these TV commercials with a somber narrator voice telling you how committed we are” and WHY WOULD SOMEBODY EAT A DAMN BAT these memes are getting old hey do you think that Carole Baskin woman actually fed her husband to a tiger maybe we should order pizza tonight wait I think we had pizza last night are you sure it’s Tuesday because it feels more like Thursday no please God not another freaking Zoom meeting stop already with the memes if the tiger ate her husband shouldn’t there be a skeleton somewhere are we flattening the curve yet Dr. Fauci Dr. Birx because we’re in a recession no wait maybe it’s a depression look at the unemployment numbers we are never going to recover from this if the virus doesn’t kill us we will starve to death we need more money from the government we need billions no we need trillions no we need MORE trillions where is this money coming from we have to open the economy up but if we do WE WILL ALL DIE hey I found some toilet paper oh no it’s one-ply which is basically the same as using your bare hand thank God I also found some hand sanitizer and speaking of good news Bernie Sanders is endorsing Joe Biden so apparently they’re both still alive if I see one more meme I am going to puke in my facemask I’m afraid to get on a scale my thighs are basically two armadillo-sized wads of pizza dough hey Dr. Birx Dr. Fauci when will we have a vaccine when will we have herd immunity when can we go outside when can we go back to work what is the “new normal” good lord what did Trump say about disinfectants DON’T INJECT CLOROX YOU IDIOTS what about the food chain what about reinfection what about the second wave hey they’re showing the NFL draft and Georgia is opening the tattoo parlors and holy crap now it’s…

May
…and we are, as a nation, exhausted. We are literally sick and tired of the pandemic. But amid all the gloom, there is a ray of sunshine: As we go through this harrowing experience — affecting all Americans, in both red states and blue states — we are starting to realize that our common humanity is more important than our political differences.

Ha ha! Seriously, we hate each other more than ever. We disagree about everything — when to reopen the economy, whether to wear masks, whether to go to the beach, whether it’s OK to say “China” — everything. Each side believes that it is motivated purely by reason, facts and compassion, and that the other side is evil and stupid and sincerely wants people to die. Every issue is binary: My side good, other side bad. There is no nuance, no open-mindedness, no discussion.

On the other hand, there is starting to be more toilet paper.

President Trump continues to provide leadership during the crisis by repeatedly pointing out that he knows an incredible amount about viruses — more than most medical doctors! — and is frankly doing a terrific job.

For its part, the White House press corps, seeking as always to be fair and objective, asks the president many probing questions, all of them variations of “why are you so despicable?”

Somewhere in here the president goes on Twitter to suggest, without evidence, that MSNBC anchor Joe Scarborough committed murder, but we have reached the point where this falls into the category of “ho-hum.”

Meanwhile, in a basement somewhere in Delaware, Joe Biden and his campaign team have managed to procure a “webcam,” which they intend to use to “log on” to the “internet” so that Joe’s campaign message can go “viral,” just as soon as Joe decides what it is.

In scandal news, the justice department moves to drop all charges against former Trump National Security Advisor Michael Flynn. Outraged Democrats claim this is a travesty of justice; outraged Republicans claim it is proof that the Deep State tried to stage a coup. And thus we are back to arguing about the 2016 election, which we are going to keep arguing about until everybody involved has been dead for 50 years.

On a more uplifting note, America cheers the first manned space launch from U.S. soil in nine years as the commercially built SpaceX rocket, carrying two NASA astronauts, blasts off for the International Space Station, only to discover, upon arrival, that it has been closed since 2014.

Here we should at least mention the arrival of the Asian murder hornets. In any other year they would have been a huge story, comparable to famous celebrity pests of the past, such as the killer bees, or the cast of “Jersey Shore.” But in 2020 there is simply too much competition, and the murder hornets end up living in a cheap motel near the Canadian border, their dreams of fame shattered.

In sports, Major League Baseball tries to come up with a plan to salvage the 2020 season, a task that becomes more urgent each day as the Houston Astros already have won 137 games, all of them no-hitters.

The National Football League also is trying to adapt to the pandemic, exploring the possibility of a season with no fans, no coaches and no players.

“We’re thinking of just showing 60 minutes of referees throwing penalty flags and peering at replay monitors,” says NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. “So it won’t really be much different.”

Meanwhile the National Hockey League admits that it stopped playing games in 2003, but nobody noticed.

Toward the end of the month the economy is starting to open up, the virus numbers in many places seem to be improving and people are starting to venture out of their homes. For a few minutes, the nation seems to be groping its way, an inch at a time, toward relative calm. And then…

WHAM, 2020 strikes again, this time in Minneapolis, where the horrendous killing of George Floyd at the hands of police ignites a protest movement that quickly spreads across the nation, sometimes mutating into violence. In the past, such movements tended to lose energy, smothered under a thick cloud of politicians’ platitudes, but this one has legs, and as we enter…

June
…the protest movement grows in size and passion with frankly not a whole lot of social distancing. In Washington, D.C., large crowds gather in front of the White House.

President Trump, angered by reports that at one point he retreated to an underground bunker, states that in fact he was merely inspecting the bunker, this being a responsibility explicitly assigned to the president by the Constitution, right after where it says he’s in charge of foreign policy.

To demonstrate that he is not the kind of leader who hides in bunkers, the president courageously goes outside (after the protesters have been cleared away) and personally walks several hundred feet to historic St. John’s Church, where he holds up a Bible. Or possibly it is a thesaurus. The important thing is that it is a serious-looking book and a strong visual, at a time when what this wounded and divided nation needs, more than ever, is strong visuals.

For their part, the Democrats, fed up with the longstanding pattern of systemic racism and police misconduct in major U.S. cities, vow to bring about real reform, just as soon as they can figure out who, exactly, is in charge of these cities.

One much-discussed reform proposal is defunding the police, which is clearly defined by its proponents as “taking the funding away from the police” as well as “not taking the funding away from the police.”

Meanwhile COVID-19 cases are rising alarmingly, especially in the South. President Trump, having apparently decided that the best way to deal with the pandemic, as chief executive, is to occasionally tweet about it, focuses his efforts on getting re-elected. He holds a rally in Tulsa, where, addressing an issue of concern to all Americans, he explains in detail that the ramp he had to walk down at the West Point graduation ceremony was slippery AND steep. The president gets a big hand from the crowd when, displaying leadership, he drinks from a water glass with one hand.

During this period the Biden campaign focuses its energies primarily on being in Delaware.

Also during this time important news events are occurring in Europe, Asia, Africa, South America and possibly even Canada. But we frankly do not have time to think about these places.

In sports, Major League Baseball owners and players, faced with the very real threat that the Houston Astros will win the World Series unopposed, reach an agreement to hold a shortened season, with a few COVID-related rule modifications:

The “batter’s box” will be an actual plexiglass box completely enclosing the batter.
To minimize airborne saliva droplets, umpires will call balls and strikes by shouting into their elbows. Also players must limit infield chatter to fewer than 10 syllables.
Unacceptable: “HeybatterbatterbatterbatterSWING!”

Acceptable: “ HeybatterbatterbatterSWING!”

In the event that a batter gets on base, all players on both teams will immediately be tested for coronavirus.
At the end of nine innings or one week, whichever comes first, the team with the fewest positive tests will be declared the winner.
Speaking of positive tests, in…

July
…COVID-19 cases continue to rise sharply in some southern states, accompanied by what the World Health Organization describes as an “alarming” spike in smugness in some northern states, notably New York, where Gov. Andrew Cuomo unveils a poster, for sale at $11.50, commemorating, in a cartoony manner, New York’s pandemic experience. Really. It is as if the White Star Line sold whimsical souvenirs of the Titanic.

On July 4, despite all the bad news and the gloomy outlook, Americans pause to celebrate the independence of their nation by reducing entire neighborhoods to smoking rubble with illegal fireworks.

In a decision that outrages Democrats, President Trump commutes the federal prison sentence of his longtime friend and political operative Roger Stone. The White House states that imprisoning the 67-year-old Stone would be inhumane because he has a medical condition that requires him “to roam free at night seeking fresh human blood.”

Meanwhile in Delaware, Joe Biden’s team continues to ponder the question of who should be Joe’s running mate, the goal being to find somebody who (a) is a woman and (b) has a name that Joe can remember.

Kanye West announces that he is running for president, representing the Birthday Party. In any other year this would seem ridiculous, but in 2020 a lot of people are like “why not?”

In other political news, the coronavirus continues to disrupt both major parties’ convention plans. The Republicans, having already moved Trump’s acceptance speech from the Spectrum Center in Charlotte, N.C., to the VyStar Veterans Memorial Arena in Jacksonville, Fla., announce that they are now considering the Roll ‘n’ Shoot Bowling Alley & Gun Range in Elwood, Okla., contingent on the availability of “a long enough extension cord.”

The Democrats also have downsized their convention, which originally was to be a four-day event at the Wisconsin Center in Milwaukee but is now going to take place mainly on Instagram.

On the diplomatic front, the Trump administration announces that, after tense high-level negotiations, it has reached a peace agreement under which U.S. troops will be withdrawn from Portland, Ore., where for many weeks protestors have been seeking social justice via a combination of peaceful demonstrations and arson.

By far the month’s most disturbing event occurs on July 15 when Twitter, responding to a cyberattack, temporarily suspends many verified blue-check accounts. Within minutes emergency rooms in Washington and New York are overwhelmed by media thought leaders whose brains are literally exploding from the pressure of unreleased insights.

Meanwhile in the rest of the nation, non-elite Americans wander the streets aimlessly, with no way to know what they should think. Fortunately this situation lasts only a few hours, but it highlights the urgent need for a federally maintained Blue Check Media Emergency Tweet Reserve, similar to the National Helium Reserve, but more gaseous.

In sports, the Washington Redskins, bowing to mounting public pressure, announce that they are changing their name, which critics say is insensitive. They will henceforth be known as the Pittsburgh Redskins.

In Major League Baseball, the teams begin a shortened season with stadium seats occupied by cardboard cutouts representing fans, except in the case of the Houston Astros, who use live human snipers.

Speaking of threats, in…

August
…President Trump escalates his attacks on TikTok, a Chinese-owned social-media app that threatens our national security by causing millions of Americans to learn stupid dances while Chinese people are making useful products to sell to Americans. The president wants to force TikTok to be sold to Microsoft, apparently in the hope that Microsoft will render it unusable by means of “updates.”

In other foreign-policy action, Trump brokers a historic Middle East peace agreement, which, along with the estimated 45 previous historic Middle East peace agreements, brings the Middle East one step closer to potentially being on the verge of reaching the brink of what could some day become a stepping stone to lasting peace, although you should not hold your breath.

Meanwhile at home, the nation’s mood increasingly is tense and angry as Americans are bombarded all day, every day, with a constant stream of news about protests, boycotts, disruption, despair and rage. And that’s just on SportsCenter.

California, as it traditionally does at this time of year, bursts into flames. Adding to the citizens’ misery are rolling electrical blackouts, possibly related to the fact that the state legislature has banned all sources of electricity except windmills and 9-volt batteries.

In politics, controversy swirls around the U.S. Postal Service, which until now most Americans have viewed as a non-sinister agency whose function, as authorized by the Constitution, is to faithfully, rain or shine, deliver vast quantities of bulk mail to us so we can discard it unread.

But now there are reports of USPS mailboxes mysteriously disappearing from the streets, which Democrats charge is part of a sinister Trump administration plot to sabotage mail-in voting, the theory being that voters, having no place to deposit their mail-in ballots, will give up in despair and, we don’t know, flush them down the toilet or something.

While this alleged conspiracy is being debated, Steve Bannon, a former influential Trump aide with the uncanny ability to always look like he just woke up in a dumpster, is arrested by increasingly — this cannot be a coincidence — agents of the U.S. Postal Inspection Service.

Bannon is charged with fraud in connection with a GoFundMe project called “We Build the Wall,” which is supposedly raising money for President Trump’s largely imaginary wall between the U.S. and Mexico, although according to prosecutors a better name for the project would be “We Basically Keep the Money.”

In other legal developments, Trump pardons Susan B. Anthony, calling her, in impromptu remarks delivered as aides hustle reporters away, “a terrific person who I look forward to inviting to the White House.”

In election news, Joe Biden makes history by choosing Kamala Harris as his running mate; if elected, she would become the first U.S. vice president whose name can be rearranged to spell “I Alarm A Shark.” During the Democratic debates Harris leveled some harsh criticisms at Biden, but a Biden campaign source says that “Joe has forgotten all about that. Literally.”

For his part, Trump dismisses rumors that he might change running mates, telling reporters “I’m very happy with whatshisname.”

Because of the pandemic, both parties hold their conventions virtually, which means that instead of endless hours of repetitious blather, the TV broadcasts consist of endless hours of repetitious blather but without the entertaining visuals of delegates in stupid hats.

The Democrats adopt a sweeping platform filled with bold policy initiatives that nobody will ever look at again. The Republican platform consists of, quote, “whatever was in the president’s most recent tweet.”

Speaking of principles, in…

September
…the death of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg triggers a classic display of Washington-style ethical consistency as both political parties, addressing the issue of when the vacancy should be filled, passionately embrace positions diametrically opposite the ones they passionately embraced in 2016.

Trump nominates Amy Coney Barrett to fill the seat, arguing that she is “perfectly qualified” for the high court because she is “a woman, but not like super hot.” Critics allege that Barrett belongs to a dangerous religious cult that subjugates women by forcing them to become Supreme Court justices. Everyone prepares for a cordial and informative confirmation process.

In other political news, the New York Times, in a politically devastating career-ending bombshell report, reveals that an analysis of Trump’s tax records shows that pretty much his only major success, as a businessman, has been playing the part of a successful businessman on a TV show.

Coming on the heels of two politically devastating bombshell reports earlier in the month — one alleging that Trump mocked the military, and one that he lied about the seriousness of the coronavirus — this brings to an even 500 the total number of times Trump has been devastated by bombshell media reports.

Joe Biden leaves Delaware briefly to give a campaign speech in Philadelphia, where he makes the following statement: “If Donald Trump has his way, the complications from COVID-19, which are well beyond what they should be — it’s estimated that 200 million people have died — probably by the time I finish this talk.” Then it’s back to Delaware for Joe.

The biggest political event of the month is the much-anticipated Trump-Biden debate, a lively affair featuring a frank and open exchange of sentence fragments highlighted by a heroic but ultimately unsuccessful attempt on the part of moderator Chris Wallace to silence the president with a taser.

Biden inspires his supporters by appearing, most of the time, to be fully aware that he is participating in a debate. For his part, Trump displays presidential leadership by firmly yet calmly reassuring an anxious nation that the election will be a complete fraud.

When it’s over both sides declare victory as Chris Wallace retreats to his dressing room to ingest Xanax pills through a funnel.

In other domestic news, there are these alarming developments:

The federal deficit reaches $3.3 trillion, as the government continues its unchecked descent into horrendous, unsustainable levels of debt, with neither political party even seriously acknowledging the danger, let alone taking meaningful action to prevent future generations of Americans from being permanently screwed.
The Kardashians decide to stop making “Keeping Up With The Kardashians.”
Meanwhile as fires continue to devastate the West, the California legislature, meeting in emergency session, votes to ban lightning.

Abroad, the Middle East moves a step closer to eventually being on the verge of approaching the threshold of what could some day become a pathway to lasting peace as the Trump administration announces yet another historic agreement, this one involving Bahrain, which the president says “is apparently a country over there.”

In other foreign-policy action, the president orders an air strike on TikTok.

In college sports, both the Big Ten and Pac-12 vote to resume playing football, citing the improving COVID-19 situation and the fact that the Houston Astros are leading both conferences with a combined 179-0 record. Conference officials say they will implement strict medical protocols to insure that the athletes can safely resume violently injuring each other.

The pandemic continues to dominate the news in…

October
…when the White House announces that President Trump is infected with the coronavirus, as are the first lady, White House staffers and others who have been near the president at events where many people did not wear masks or observe social distancing. This seems to suggest, crazy as it sounds, that the virus — Who could possibly have known this? — is an infectious disease that you can catch from other people.

In an effort to keep the nation informed on the president’s health without creating confusion, the administration employs a two-pronged communications strategy:

Prong one: The president’s doctors hold a press briefing in which they say that the president is doing fine.

Prong two: Immediately thereafter, White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows tells reporters that the president’s vital signs are “worrying.”

While hundreds of certified Twitter users without medical degrees offer their insights on this situation, the president begins a course of treatment at Walter Reed that includes an antibody cocktail, an antiviral drug, a steroid and — this really happened — a motorcade ride around the hospital. Trump’s doctors describe the motorcade as “a totally standard medical treatment that is not insanely irresponsible at all.”

Meanwhile the virus continues to spread through the White House, eventually infecting everyone in the executive branch above the rank of custodian. But never mind those people: The important thing is that the president recovers quickly and announces that COVID-19 is frankly no big deal for anybody who has a large team of doctors, 24/7 access to a world-class medical facility and a helicopter. Then, having learned an important lesson from his experience, the president resumes holding massive rallies where many people do not wear masks.

The Senate confirms Amy Coney Barrett after she successfully completes the traditional Judiciary Committee hazing ritual, in which she must answer questions for three consecutive days without saying anything.

Joe Biden enters the final stretch of the campaign with a schedule that sometimes has him doing as many as one appearance per day. Also taking a brutal toll on the former vice president is the fact that he must repeatedly, day after day, deal with the grueling physical strain of not telling reporters what he thinks about packing the Supreme Court. At one appearance, when asked about this, Biden says (this is an actual quote): “the moment I answer that question, the headline in every one of your papers will be on the answer to that question.” While reporters wrestle with the Confucian profundity of this statement, Joe is whisked back to Delaware.

In other political action, vice presidential candidates Mike Pence and Kamala Harris square off in a debate, and the only thing anybody remembers about it 10 minutes later is that a fly landed on Pence’s head.

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