Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Aug 04 - 01:10 PM

Kat,

We've seen several parishioners and their families through this (CHF, etc), up close, and I can tell you this-- whatever one's spiritual views may be, it's the most blessed time in a family, as it all unfolds. (I wrote about Kelts' Dillman's lassing in the Why We Sing thread once.) I think you will find the silences the fullest you've ever experienced, and all the usual family stuff that goes wrong in words can go so very right, in that silence. Even the most painful parts are so replete with joy.

I wish you all the best in this time to come... and please, take good care of yourself in it so you can be fully there during and afterwards.

~Susan

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST,JennyO
Date: 21 Aug 04 - 10:14 AM

Your dad will know when he is ready to move on to the next stage - he knows you will be all right, and part of him will always be with you.

We are all here for support when you need us.

Sending {{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}} from Oz.

Jenny

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Amergin
Date: 21 Aug 04 - 02:24 AM

You know...your mum will come by and take him home, when it is time...just know you have friends here....who will offer their shoulders to you virtual or otherwise.

I know your dad is so happy that he has this life....esopecially after raising such wonderful kids...and grandkids. He has a family that loves him. That truly is all a person can hope for.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 09:06 PM

and I say what Amos said.

kat, you know this, but you'll experience depression. Just don't stay there, come back to us.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Amos
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:56 PM

He'll make his decision and take his own step past the point of return some time; until then, you do what you can to let him know it is okay, to comfort, and if nothing better is possible, just to sympathize. He knows you.

A

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:43 PM

Best wishes to all of you.

SRS

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bill D
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:35 PM

we don't wish an end, but we don't wish misery and sadness either. He has done pretty durn well for 87 years, and there would be relief at knowing he AND you didn't have to cope every day.

hoping that it all works out reasonably and comfortably...

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bobert
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:27 PM

(((((((((((((((Prayers from Wes Ginny & Hugs, too)))))))))))))))

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:14 PM

I will pray for that, kat. You have had a rough summer. Take care.
Mary

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: katlaughing
Date: 20 Aug 04 - 08:01 PM

Dear Friends,

Just an update: Dad's quality of life is going downhill with congestive heart failure and all of it attendant problems. I cannot say all that I would, at the moment, except that I'd like to give thanks for an end to his discomfort and suffering.

Thanks, so much,

kat

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Mudlark
Date: 23 Jul 04 - 12:41 AM

Dear Kat...anyone worth loving is worth crying over...all dads are special, and yours maybe more than most. Loss is a part of life, but that doesn't make it any easier. But holding it back surely makes it worse. Hang in there, and I hope that Sparky has lots of good times left...good daughters, good wife, good animal companions...that's a lot to live for.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Ebbie
Date: 23 Jul 04 - 12:27 AM

You know, kat, since we all do travel that same road eventually (although I personally am not yet sure that I'm going to:), it's a great comfort for the ones who are having to let their loved one go to know that the traveler has chosen the gradual, releasing-the-fingers-bit-by-bit route. Given the choice, animals do that and I think that we can learn a lot from them. To sleep more and more and get all drifty- hey, that's not so bad.

So, yes, cry, get it out- and then when you can't possibly cry anymore, discover that there are yet more tears, and will be for a long time to come.

I still cry sometimes at some losses (including dogs!), no matter how long ago- and I don't cry easily. However, I did learn eventually not to choke back the tears- that lump in the throat is mighty hard to swallow.

{{{{{{{Hugggggg}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: catspaw49
Date: 22 Jul 04 - 08:32 PM

It's a tough time katmyluv, but I will hold an even bigger part of my heart open to you with the best thoughts yours for an easy transition as Sparky travels the road.

Much love,

Pat

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: katlaughing
Date: 22 Jul 04 - 08:02 PM

Thanks, so much, Bert. Sorry I didn't answer earlier. I hadn't talked to him or his wife until just now, this week.

He seems to be holding his own; having very clear moments, some confusion, lots of sleep. He watches the news and can turn the air blue with what he thinks of the currrent Resident et alia; then ask me to get a copy of H. Rider Haggard's "She", so that he can read it, because "it's very popular right now." He read it years ago, of course, but all in all, he seems to be doing fairly well that way.

Physically, he has a full-time catheter, has to walk with a cane, very slowly, and is still cooped up in the house, but as he said earlier, he's still getting a lot of pleasure out of his dog, cat, and wife. Thank the gawds and gawdesses for the critters...he'd be all alone in the mornings if it weren't for them.

He thinks the world of you all and said to say-so when next I posted. He gets a little teary when I tell him about your words, all of you, and how far-flung are those who know of him and have heard his songs. It touches his heart and I believe it helps him, immensely, to carry-on.

I've been struck with inconsolable crying a couple of nights in a row, now. Don't have any idea why; can't think of anyone I might've picked up vibes from, but I do suspect, it probably has a lot to do, subconsciously, with the thought of his passing and the knowledge of you all and your infinite kindness to us all. Thanks dear friends, from Dad and myself.

luvyakat

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bert
Date: 22 Jul 04 - 12:09 PM

Hey Sparky Lad, we still love you!

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bert
Date: 21 Jul 04 - 03:32 PM

How is Sparky doing? We can't let this thread drop down too far 'cos we have to let him know we are still thinking of him.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST,Augie
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 10:10 PM

Sorry about the unsigned post-geez I hate those

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 10:09 PM

Kat
Remind your father that he should be proud, for the obviously excellent (judging from your posts anyway) daughter he raised. For those of us fortunate enough to be parents, there is no better legacy to leave.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 07:11 PM

...and let him know that I included "some of his cowboy ballads" on my short list of favorite ballads in the recent thread here asking for folks' fav trad ballads.

And love to you both, Ms. Kat.

Art

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST,winterbright
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 07:04 PM

Kat, love to you and best to your dad. White light is boundless.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 03:45 PM

Oh ... and tell him I got the 100th post which cheered me up. Thanks Sparky!

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: TheBigPinkLad
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 03:44 PM

Ask him for advise. That'll cheer him up.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Ebbie
Date: 19 Jul 04 - 12:14 PM

Jeri said: "Remind him there's a whole bunch of folks out in the world who know about him because of you, and care about him and his little girl." Thanks for that, kat.

Buddy Tabor recently wrote a song about "wild, running horses" that sings a cowboy's last request. The imagery is wonderful and from the first time I heard it, it has made me think of Sparky. Shows you that you don't have to have met someone in order to know them!

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Mudlark
Date: 18 Jul 04 - 02:02 PM

Love and all good wishes to you both. Sounds like you are both approaching this with grace and a remarkable go-with-the flow attitude, a tribute and an inspiration.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bert
Date: 18 Jul 04 - 10:09 AM

I was just reading the Comfort food thread and got to wondering. Is there anything that your Dad would like that us Mudcatters could make and send him?

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Flash Company
Date: 18 Jul 04 - 06:03 AM

Hi kat!
Sounds like he has maybe turned an important corner, glad about that, I was getting worried for you.
Tell him that there is an event coming up in Huddersfield, Yorks called Sing Live which in the local paper declares that singers have to be at least 116 years old to take part! (There is no upper age limit!)
I expect to see him there in about 29 years time. Unfortunately I'll still be 20 years to young to take part myself!

LOL to you both

FC

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: katlaughing
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 05:42 PM

I was wondering that, too, Sister Dear? Maybe you were on your daughter's pc, instead? Anyway, it's nice to see you here and your beautiful words made me cry, as do most of the postings in here. I often print them out and send them to Dad. I don't know if I will this time, but I'll surely tell him about them over the phone.

Folks, whatever you are doing is helping. His bladder is still old and falling to pieces, but right after I asked for your help, he called me, bright and early the next day, to ask if there was something I wanted to say to him on the phone, the night before, but hadn't had a chance to say! Pretty good moment of short-term memory there.

We talked about him maybe walking on the the other side which he is not doing and that he knows he doesn't have to hang around for any of us. He said, though, he is getting a lot of good out of his dog, cat, and wife and as long as he can get around, even if it's just in the house with a cane, he wants to be here. He said if he ever gets like some "poor bastards" he's seen in nursing homes, bed-ridden, then he wouldn't want to be here.

Your words have gone to my heart and dad's and I am gratefull. Thanks, so much,

luvya'llkat

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: bet
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 05:12 PM

Hum, wonder why I came up as a guest? bet

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Sonnet
Date: 17 Jul 04 - 02:47 PM

Kat - picturing you all in a circle of love, light and protection.

love,

Jay and Chris McS

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Jul 04 - 07:43 PM

My dear sister, What wonderful words and thoughts these people have for you and Dad. I wish him love and peace. And for you, remember all the great memories of him that you can. Love ya, bet

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: CapriUni
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 11:26 PM

{{{{{{{{{Kat}}}}}}}}}}

{{{{{{{{{Sparky}}}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: JennyO
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 02:14 AM

Surrounding you both with {{{{{{{{{{{{{{love and light}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Jenny

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: wilbyhillbilly
Date: 15 Jul 04 - 01:53 AM

Hey, come on Sparky, I'm waiting to clean up your NEXT tape, so get on in there to the music room.

WE LOVE YOU,

Kat, our thoughts and prayers are with you.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 09:20 PM

My best thoughts and wishes go to your dad, katlaughing, and to you and the rest of your family.

So sorry to hear about the loss of your mother, Andrés. My best thoughts and wishes go to you and your family as well.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: open mike
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 07:05 PM

i am singing a cow boy song here to lift your spirits!
yipee ti yi yo...sometimes life is a hard row to hoe...
there's too much holdin' on and not enough lettin' go
i won't look at hobbles and I can't stand fences...
the smell of pin~on smoke, the wind kickin' up a dust
devil or two, and the freedoem of the wide open spaces,
the sun shine etches lines upon our faces..
the milky way and the coyote's howl
and on the high ridges the panther does prowl
the mustang herd thunders across the plain
life is so real with joy,m grief and pain,
maybe this life is not the best
but oh, aren't we lucky to live in the west!

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: SINSULL
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 06:21 PM

Miss kitty,
How hard it must be for you to let him go. You are both in my prayers. Stay strong, love.
Mary

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Joybell
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 06:16 PM

Kat and Mr Sparky, My thoughts too from across the ocean. Sorry I missed your thread earlier on Kat. My Dad died when I was 10, nearly 50 years ago, but I still remember his singing. Please give my love to your Dad Kat and keep some for yourself. Joy

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Amergin
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 06:15 PM

Well hell katdarling, you know you're not suppose to be giving us bad news like this...and your dad knows he's not suppose to get sick...you tell him that he's suppose to get better again so he can live to an old age. anyways I'll keep him in my thoughts...and you take care of yourself too.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bobert
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 05:37 PM

Warm thoughts from this Wes Ginny holler.

Bobert

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Metchosin
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 03:24 PM

My heart goes out to both you and your dad, kat. We are going through a similar process with my Mum right now too.
Warmest regards,
Susan

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 02:20 PM

I'm sorry, Kat--this is a hard time for your father and the rest of the family. You don't mention any medical attention--I hope that his medical caregivers have the compassion to not make this time a misery of needles and such, unless there is a true cure at hand. My mother finally rebelled against it all and refused food and medication except for pain. She wanted to go in peace, and I hope for your father when the time comes that he also has peace.

SRS

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Mark Clark
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 02:08 PM

Kat, I'm sure sorry to hear this. I'll keep him my thoughts and prayers.

      - Mark

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Jeri
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 01:49 PM

Kat, I understand this somewhat. Know that through all those arguments and any things you feel you could have done better, he's loved you and known you loved and love him. My mom and I used to joke about that sort of thing: "You remember how mad you got when you wanted to go to Woodstock, and I said 'no'?" Write down the memories, sing the songs, look at the pictures, and talk to him when you can. Remind him there's a whole bunch of folks out in the world who know about him because of you, and care about him and his little girl.

Love,
Jeri

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Escamillo
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 01:12 PM

That's what he is, INSPIRATION for us. Many of us know Sparky through the loving words of his daughter Kat. That's also a good way to be known. Our prayers are with you and your family, Sparky.

Un abrazo,
Andrés
(I've lost my mother Ester (83) on June 28. She had spread her love to all of us and others, for so many years, and she will be with us forever)

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Áine
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 09:46 AM

Hey there, Sparky,

I'm so sorry to hear that you're ailing. You're an inspiration to a lot of us here at the Mudcat, and I hope that you don't let that ol' plumbin' problem get you down. You have a great family that really loves you, whether you pee standing up, sitting down or standing on your head -- so what the hey!

Keep those spirits up and keep the music going -- they do kinda work together, don't they. ;-)

Big hugs and good thoughts to ya, Áine

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: jeffp
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 09:40 AM

Hugs and prayers.

Jeff

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: wysiwyg
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 09:00 AM

Aw. Breathing love.

~Susan

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 08:33 AM

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Wish they weren't virtual - but hope you can feel them anyway.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Bert
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 08:32 AM

Lots of love and good thoughts are on the way.

Bert & Tree.

Subject: RE: Kat's Dad, Sparky, needs some good thoughts
From: Big Mick
Date: 14 Jul 04 - 08:27 AM

I'm here, sweetie. The great circle continues to turn, and glory be that it does. But these times certainly try our beliefs. Be close, and help him along. Don't worry, his voice will always be with you, just as those that care about you are now.

All the best,

Mick