Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Bill D
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 11:42 PM

reminds me of an old joke....

One day a sailor, while bringing flowers to a cemetery to place by the grave of a departed friend, noticed an old Chinese man placing a bowl of rice on a nearby grave.

The sailor walked up to the man and with a smirk on his face, asked,

"When do you expect your friend to come up and eat the rice?"

The old Chinese man replied with a smile, "Same time your friend comes up to smell the flowers."

When I am dead, you may do as you wish...sing to me, offer me pie, but I doubt very much that it will make any difference....I expect to be very quiet forever.

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: DougR
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 11:35 PM

Rick! You opend this door. where are you? I think I'm a little bit out of my element here. I do believe that somewhere in the bible there is an admonition (paraphrasing), if thy hand offends thee, cut it off, or words to that effect. Not to make light of the subject, but a bunch of guitar players would be in deep dodoo if they accepted that passage literally.

DougR

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: bflat
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 11:31 PM

Yes,I do that. I have read letters and played recordings that I felt the deceased would have an interest in knowing. I like looking for names I might recognize. There are some very pretty graveyards which I have strolled through for the view and the chance to have some time with my thoughts; to speak aloud without anyone giving me negative feedback. It has helped me in an odd way.

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: JenEllen
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 11:30 PM

My mom has been dead for 20 years now, we were great friends while we had the time. I can only get back home to 'visit' about once a year or so, but when I do, I always make time for 'girl-talk'. I remember when the Reese's Peanut Butter Cups with cookies in them came out, my first thought was "Mom would LOVE these!" When I went home that year I left some out at her grave. It's a strange thing really, I can't say that I believe in an 'afterlife' of any kind, just that your energy goes on, but I can't stop going out and sharing the news of family, boyfriends, and where life has taken me.

We clean up the pioneer cemetaries out here, and I fell in love with the cemetaries in Williamsburg VA. In high school, my best friend and I got plastered and drove in the middle of a thunderstorm to 'visit' Hank Williams. I remember going out there, but I can't say I remember coming home. I like to think he was watching out for a couple of stupid kids.

Rick, did you ever think that we go to the cemetaries more for ourselves than those who are buried there? Like the thought of them 'looking down' (in the case of most of the folks that I know it would be 'looking up'!) on us gives us a sort of protective shroud to face what life on this earth doles out? I think some of the best decisions that I ever made after talking to my mom weren't so much from her approval or disapproval, but in sitting quietly for a few minutes and hearing myself say the things out loud. If it sounds ridiculous saying it to a tombstone surrounded in sweet-pea vines, then it's probably not a very good decision to begin with.

~JenEllen

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 11:09 PM

It's been a while but I occasionally visit the graves of dead friends, most of the old gang having succumbed to overdose, fatal traffic accident, or gun violence. I pour a little libation over them, take a swig myself, ask how they've been doing, tell them the latest news about so-and-so and such-and-such. They never answer back, but communing with them like this makes it seem as though they've not gone so far away.

Relatives the same way. I pat their gravestone, as if I were stroking my grandmother's hair as she lay dying in a hospital bed, and offer a few words of encouragement.

"It's okay," I say. "It's all right."

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Ebbie
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 10:50 PM

Jon, I understand where you're coming from- I was brought up that way. However, I do believe you're jumping the fence here instead of using the gate. When a person goes to a seer with the aim of contacting the dead, that is a dozen miles' difference from talking to someone in a graveyard. I personally don't see any reason why a person's spirit would hang around the grave site- or around a cast off body- so I doubt that one would have a meaningful experience in a graveyard with that person.

However, again, anecdotal evidence suggests that at least on occasion there is contact. Perhaps it's simply that we are easier to 'reach' in a relaxed or pensive or wistful state than when we are busy in our work-a-day lives. Maybe, if we were but sensitive enough, we'd find there are beings who have tried unsuccessfully and repeatedly to get our attention.

In any case, intent must be the operative ingredient. When a person walking in the light, protected by the light of Love, whether purposefully or inadvertently contacts or is contacted by beings gone before, I say it comes from God.

I trust the Creator and if he/she ordains that I have such an experience, I'm humbled and exalted at the same time.

So I shall continue to stroll and linger and ponder among the graves. And yes, address a thought or a song to individuals.

All the above IMHO. :)

Ebbie

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Sorcha
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 10:46 PM

Jon, I think that it is Calling Up the dead that is forbidden, and I agree, it can be dangerous. I was raised, but am not now, Christian, and yes, I talk to the dead nearly every day, be it in a graveyard or other. We need the counsel of the dead, we need their wisdom, their "advice". What we don't need is their actual presence. And neither do they.They are "There", we are "Here",for yet a while.

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 10:44 PM

Doug, I am no good at rembering quotes from the bible and where they came from and I will try to find some referene tommorrow. I think it starts in the OT with somebody consulting a medium instead of God.

Like it or not, these matters are religion specific and in some cases divisions within a religion. I am one of thsose Christians who believes in the unseen world. It would be impossible to proove one way or other but my personal feeling is that when people think they are talking to the dead, they are in fact communicating with imposters - demons/ evil spirits.

Jon

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: DougR
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 10:29 PM

Jon: Don't know what you base your statement on. I'm a Christian (if that makes any difference) and I can't recall any substantive reports written or verbal that forbids one to talk to the dead. My wife died last August and I find myself, from time to time making comments to her as though she were present. Does that mean I am condemned to some sort of purgatory or something? I'm really curious. Where did you get such an idea? Or maybe you are just putting us on!

Rick, I think cemeteries are facinating. I went back to my old hometown recently to attend a reunion of classmates and visited my mother and father's graves. I saw markers on graves of many old friends that brought back lots of good memories.

DougR

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 09:20 PM

I have to state my Christian view point here. To enjoy the peace of a graveyard is fine but talking to the dead is forbidden and is IMO dangerous.

Jon

Subject: RE: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 09:13 PM

Rick: i've walked grave yards but for me battlefields are also places to confer with those gone on. It is always special to me to participate in the annual re-enactment of the battle of Cedar Creek for that reason. The re-enactment is held on the actual battlefields and I make it a point to walk (Respectfully of course) through the Belle Grove plantation house. The house is reputed to be haunted. It is also the place where General Stephen Ramseur died as a result of his wounds. The Confederate general was a classmate and good friend of Gen. Custer who would suffer a similar fate twelve years later in the wilds of Montana. I played Taps and Amazing Grace at Cedar Creek. Both bring tears to my eyes each time I play them. How about the other mudcatters? Any input? Neil

Subject: Chatting With The Deceased? Do You?
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 16 Jun 00 - 09:00 PM

In another thread someone mentioned visiting Patsy Cline's resting place (think it was "Flattop"), and it got me thinking. I've always loved to walk through graveyards, check out the names of the folks who've "been", and in general just revel in the peacefulness. Many times I've taken an instrument and just sat under a tree and played (no jokes about "captive audience").

Once I discovered a hitherto unknown relative (a "Fielding" from the mid-1850s) as I walked through an older part of a local cemetary. A little further research made that person "live again" for me.

Friends of mine have made pilgrimages to the graves of Charlie Poole and Leadbelly, and while in Britain I've hunted down Marx, an obviously fraudulent "Robin Hood" site (that he probably didn't exist didn't deter the locals) and an equally fraudulent but nonetheless fascinating "King Arthur" site.

Perhaps one of the nicest sites I've been to, is the grave of humourist Stephen Leacock. He's mostly known in Canada, but made millions laugh. I played a song about Orillia Ontario for "him".

Any other graveyard wanderers?

Rick